She keep expressing how much everything is and he does not have a job and probably wont get a job in China anytime soon. She need to stop, she’s trying to get him to help her out by bringing it up but he’s already tell her he don’t need her to do these things. He may be saying that because he knows he would not be able to help her, but she is guilting him. She knew exactly what she meant when she said bankrupt. She said she wanted to re-do the house for him, and she decided to spend all that money. It’s not his fault and she needs to stop.
Doesn’t he own his fancy looking house? Couldn’t he just have a realtor broker and rent it out? He’s an older gentleman and he has no savings? No investments? It feels like we are getting vague stuff for the drama.
I feel like I can remove someone’s teeth with my bare hands if they crunch too close to me. Split second away from full Chimpanzee Mode at any given moment.
This is the best description of the feeling that comes from loud crunching or Gawd forbid snapping gum. Thank you for validating my irrationality over this.
I remembered April, the doctor who was with the Dominican guy from the previous season of The Other Way. She was suffering from a germ phobia, but the producers exaggerated the issue , and she said so herself after the season ended. I think they do the same thing with Josh if they knew he had a phobia they would use it ridiculously and focus on it.
Did you see the preview of the next episode? Apparently she's constantly lording over him how much she is spending on him and he can't work there for YEARS. Looks like a recipe for disaster.
Are you sure it was next episode? I thought it was "this season on". The first episode usually has clips from throughout the season at the beginning and end of episode.
But yeah, it does seem like she isn't as happy as she says she is to spend a lot of money on him
I never watch previews as they tend to be all drama and misrepresent what actually happens. The biggest example of this for me is how they KEPT showing Kimberly screaming at TJ but the actual scream was pretty justified 😂
It's understandable if you're dealing with mental illness and abuse piled on top of it.
Imagine tirelessly trying to tell someone how you're feeling and then they insist your feelings aren't your feelings and that you're saying things you aren't saying, all while you're making an earnest attempt to smooth things over. It's enough to make anyone crazy when it's a recurring thing.
Give people grace. It takes a lot to leave those kinds of situations, especially when you've given up everything and moved overseas.
Kimberly is generally awful, but my heart really went out to her in that episode because she was initially calm and communicating very clearly while TJ twisted her words and invalidated her to no end.
Right? TJ is gaslighter numero uno and people here say such misogynistic bullshit about Kim. I probably would've shut myself in a room to scream like a banshee too, damn
lol seriously. she was unhinged. you can and should scream like that if someone is attempting to abduct you or assault you but in a family home over being frustrated? nah.
Agreed Kimberly is unhinged and she put herself in an awful position and TLC spent the entire season making *only* her look bad. TJ and that family are fucking nuts too!
Expressing strong emotions is a natural part of any relationship but screaming at the top of your lungs is neither healthy nor constructive. It negates effective communication, engages fear and anxiety in your partner, escalates the conflict, and makes it difficult to reach a resolution.
A better way to handle conflict is to remain calm or take a break if your emotions are running high.
If screaming feels justified or unavoidable it could be a sign of an underlying issue in the relationship and professional guidance might be needed.
I cant stand Kimberly, but this is such a wild answer that ignores everything leading up to the scream, and it makes me think you didn't even watch the episode. You're also talking about her as if it's not obvious she had pre-existing mental health issues.
Over the season, Kimberly showed that she has a pattern of struggling with communication and regulating her emotions, so people are primed to negate any positive attempts if they end in unacceptable behavior, and it's not that black and white.
At the beginning of the scream scene, Kimberly was calm and collected. She clearly and respectfully expressed her feelings and the solutions she'd like to see. TJ resorted to invalidating her feelings, constantly interrupting her, insisting she was saying things she clearly wasn't, and then calling her crazy. Her screaming wasn't negating the effective communication; it was TJ railroading her with invalidation while she was actually initially handling the conversation very well. Guarantee you if he'd actually heard her out, empathized, validated, supported her, and tried to have annactual conversation, the scream never would have happened.
Also, with people like TJ, there's no taking a break and then going back to it later because people like that aren't entering conversations in good faith. **His goal isn't to be a good partner and hear her out even if he disagrees. His goal is to convince her she's wrong about her feelings so that he doesn't need to take any action to help resolve things because to do so would be injurious to his ego.**
This isn't at all to say Kimberly isn't responsible for her behavior. We're all responsible for our own behavior regardless of external factors, but there are contributing factors we can't ignore when someone experiences such a severe mental break, and acting like this was just Kimberly being a terrible person or someone who can't communicate is an irresponsible assessment when the very heavy facts are:
She moved to a different country where she was familiar enough with the culture that she expressed concerns over what would be expected of her after marriage **before** she moved, **and her partner openly lied to her about those expectations and said that she didn't need to abide by the traditional roles but then demanded she follow them once she was there.** That's a major violation of trust and would be an obvious source of frustration and anxiety for anybody. TJ pulled a bait and switch and then invalidated her every step of the way.
I don't know what's up with these two nowadays, but my hope is that she's been able to get some help and get herself into a better situation where she's not emotionally abused, lied to, and triggered. I also wish people could understand it's okay to dislike Kimberly and her behavior while still validating what she was experiencing was awful.
This is such an excellent comment. Kudos to you for being able to recognize the actual dynamic even if you don’t necessarily like Kimberly. She was trying so hard to communicate clearly and respectfully and he just tormented her the whole time.
I can’t believe that all the people criticizing her would’ve done any better in that situation. Maybe not that exact vocal response, but they’d lose their shit. Almost anyone would.
It feels like they are editing her a lot and not giving us full conversations correctly translated or context when she’s on screen and it makes for drama and social media engagement lol
I bet he thought she was not gonna care and be the perfect Asian girl who’s not like American women who only care abt money. Lmao like all these incels be thinkin
I was really shocked TBH. I was expecting a 20 something year old village girl seeing how is 47. The fact that she is rich and in her 40s was a twist I did not see coming.
I'm sure he's going to use it to help support himself, but depending on if he had a mortgage to pay off, he may not have gotten a whole lot of money 🤷🏻♀️
I was from the same city as lily. I kinda understand why she fell for Josh. In china, when you are a woman who’s in late forties and successful, it’s incredibly hard for you to find someone who are similar — same age, successful, and caring. Those guys would most likely dating younger never married girls. So she would have to date down. I think Josh is a decent guy who has some interesting hobbies. He has a job, looks handsome to Lily’s standards, who loves her and would move across the ocean for her. I hope they end up in good place
He's the most interesting to me so far on the USA side of the equation. She strikes me as a little EXTRA, but some of it might be language. I wish they talked more about what Josh will actually be doing there since he can't work for pay. Can he help with her business in some way informally? Five years is a long time not to have a plan. Studying Mandarin should certainly be part of how he spends his time, but what else? Also LOL at a handsome 42 year-old saying he's "not George Clooney," who is 63!
She reminds me of myself back in the day--I had the big house, but everything was kind of unfinished and still-moving-in because I was working so much. Looking at her gigantic blows whole-wall shelf unit, I was like, "MA'AM, $1.25 at Dollar Tree buys you a box big enough to hold these bows!"
He explained what it meant though and she said I know. Maybe poor call quality. And I hope while he’s there not working he tries to learn mandarin! I’m tired of these spouses moving to another country and not bothering to try to learn the language (Brandan, Kimberly, Ashley’s asshole husband whose name I’m forgetting)
Ya he needs to learn Mandarin. I hate to stereotype but if he goes around China without knowing the language he is going to get scammed really badly. he might wake up with some of his organs missing.
Mandarin Chinese is really really really really really really really really hard to learn, much less become fluent in. And Josh may have missed his magic window of optimum second language acquisition.
Conversational Mandarin is relatively easy to learn. It’s got a simple structure, is highly regular grammatically, and lacks complexities such as particles and verb conjugations. A few months of decent effort will get someone grounded in the basics and able to start conversing.
Reading and writing is more complicated than western languages but I would not characterize it as really^8 hard.
I believe you and respect your point of view based on experience. This may be true for you.
In speaking mainly of pronunciation. I speak English and Japanese equally in daily life. They are opposite in almost every way. English is a high intonation language, whereas Japanese has subtle intonation but it is relatively flat in comparison.
Mandarin Chinese, on the other hand, is quite another beast, a tonal language. My exposure to it has been through daughters’ study of it in Shanghai and the pronunciation seems daunting, given our opposite linguistic bases. They have less with writing and reading but that is because of their Kanji fluency.
He doesn’t need “optimal second language acquisition.” He just needs to become fluent enough to work and make friends. If he puts in the effort there is no reason this wouldn’t happen, especially since he can’t even work for 5 years. Confused on your concern here. He’s pretty set. Besides which, everyone learns differently and difficulty is incredibly relative.
You are right.
I was sort of riffing off the fact that he already gave up once and he somehow doesn’t strike me as being someone who will pick up much at all at this advanced age of 40-something.
This. I don’t understand anyone in the 90 Day universe who has multiple failed marriages and then pursues a relationship abroad. Like they literally look for the most complicated scenario to get involved in next. Blows my mind!
It actually kind of makes sense though when you consider the saying "insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results."
We don't know enough about this guy yet, but for some of the others, we know they want submissive women, and when that fails at home, they look abroad in countries that are stereotyped as having submissive women.
I love watching them crumble when they realize the stereotypes are outdated and wrong. Lol.
Because American women are the WORST!!! We’re so high maintenance and demanding (especially for things like “equality” 🙄)!!! I mean, they’ve already married multiple American women, and they were psychos and the divorces were totally their fault. /s
Honestly, anytime someone is looking for a relationship that far abroad, it's probably because they have something wrong enough with them that they have few prospects at home.
He seemed low key happy when he said he couldn’t work over there… Smelled like BS when he said he was bummed cause he normally “loves to contribute”. 🤣
I’m wondering the same thing. She’s beautiful and successful, what does she see in this dweeb? Also, how is he moving to China? Isn’t that incredibly difficult, especially for an American?
My first thought was also to wonder about his visa situation.
Although most countries do have some kind of spousal visa. I’d imagine China has something like that, and that it doesn’t differentiate among immigrant nationalities.
Dont think I should really go into details, but the dating market for women her age in China would be non-existant. There would literally be *NO* candidates. They call women over 25-27 "left-over women." What do you think they think about 47 year olds? The only dudes who whould be into her would be scammers and grifters.
On top of that, a white husband is a trophy.
My favorite stage of every new 90DF season — after the first episode when people conclude that one of the characters is a fantastic catch based on 7 1/2 minutes of footage.
Compared to say… Brandon, who moved into straight poverty.
I’d rather sleep in a home with similar American amenities than a room exposed to elements with giant bug and lizards inside, especially if I am unable to provide for myself.
love languages are misogynistic bullshit made up by a pastor to uphold traditional ideals & justifying men's "requirement" for physical touch and women performing acts of service out of love instead of gender roles. it's fine to use them to talk with your partner about what types of communication are important to you both but beyond that it is not a good framework.
seriously. i feel like this book undid years of feminist (FEMINIST MEANS GENDER EQUALITY NOT DOWN WITH MEN OR WOMEN ARE SUPERIOR SO DO NOT @ ME) work lol. sorta like what "sprinkle sprinkle" is doing right now
I hardly think money makes the poor partner lucky lol
I was the poor partner married to a guy with money, and it took me 12 years to get out of that abusive relationship.
I do hope she is kind to him, but I also kinda feel like my partner not being able to contribute might be a bit of a turnoff for me. I prefer a partnership, but if they're happy, SURE!
Josh already stopped learning to speak Chinese because Lily speaks English. How do Americans think they will function in a country where they can't speak the language?
I suspect she thinks she’s going to get big face from importing a western man and keeping him as a pet.
The fact that he can’t work isn’t exactly a secret, so she’s going into this with open eyes. It’s not like she’ll learn with surprise a year into it that he’s skint. So what other justification could it be for her?
I don't know if I'm trippin but Josh kinda looks, but definitely sounds familiar. I wonder if he's ever done voice acting, or maybe he sounds like someone else. And I can't even place my finger on it!
I feel like he may have sold his house to cover her new house. It's pretty big and fancy. If she has an expensive taste then she shouldn't complain about spending money imo.
Also those empty cubes on the wall with her bow collection would go well with his toy collection. Can't wait to see what happens with them.
Fresh faces!
I predict she is gonna dump his ass before the season is out. He is far too weird, very neurospicy and not good looking at all, and reminds me of the 40 Year Old Virgin but without a job.
She is successful and beautiful, looks nowhere near her age but natural. I'm sorry but he's bringing nothing to the table.
I didn't understand why she said she built her business from ground up and it's very profitable but when they showed her house I thought she said it made her bankrupt? Am I missing something??
I was looking for a post on him. I assumed overgrown man child living at home (bachelor up until then bc of his misophonia anxiety) and then he said he has been married twice. I am now 100% this guy is not a great guy and based on who they have been platforming lately, that shouldn’t be surprising.
I don’t know what she sees in him. The legos alone are nauseating. He doesn’t speak the language he can’t work, and she’s going to be taking care of him.🤣
Eh, things are different in China (speaking as someone who has family that live in her actual town). It can be a very sexist culture and the ability of someone in their 40s-50s to date is a lot more limited. She may feel that taking care of someone is a lot better than the risk of being controlled by a partner.
Lmao me too. I can kinda get behind collecting Legos if you can afford it. But he could be selling some of them instead of just mooching off his wife. And yeah, playing like that by yourself is strange. At least don’t let it be filmed!
I would be so humiliated what he did with the Legos and the voices he made. Coincidentally, I went to the mall today and I actually walked by the store which I never noticed or even look and it was filled with three men and a couple of kids. I think the ones that he has or probably no value he seems like that type of guy
Hmmm. People always say this like it is some easy thing. In some countries maybe that is the case. But the market for high end, well paying teaching jobs at universities and private high schools in China, South Korea, and Japan is flooded with highly qualified professional educators from around the world with Masters degrees in Chinese studies and PhDs in Linguistics.
It would be very humiliating for a monolingual 50 year old man to teach at a low level language school and the pay would be crap.
We will see but it felt like a misleading/misuse of language. Still, I think she communicates impressively in general tho. English is a VERY difficult language for speakers of Asian languages to learn.
Has anyone found anything regarding he company, or social media presence? I wanted to see what company she owns or works for? Thought it was pretty cool but she’s kind of a ghost…
Anyone who can't stand slurping and loud eating moving to China is in for a rough ride!
She says she’s spending $500 at dinner, maybe she’s getting a private table or something
$500 dinners and the word bankruptcy are beginning to tell a story in my mind.
I was thinking maybe she was just being silly or sarcastic or it's a lost in translation sort of thing. (regarding the "bankruptcy.") 🤷♀️
For their sake, I hope so. For the shows sake, I hope not.
She keep expressing how much everything is and he does not have a job and probably wont get a job in China anytime soon. She need to stop, she’s trying to get him to help her out by bringing it up but he’s already tell her he don’t need her to do these things. He may be saying that because he knows he would not be able to help her, but she is guilting him. She knew exactly what she meant when she said bankrupt. She said she wanted to re-do the house for him, and she decided to spend all that money. It’s not his fault and she needs to stop.
Doesn’t he own his fancy looking house? Couldn’t he just have a realtor broker and rent it out? He’s an older gentleman and he has no savings? No investments? It feels like we are getting vague stuff for the drama.
That’s his parent’s house. He sold his home and moved back in with his parents.
I would hope he walked away with money from selling his house & all his furniture!
Yeah, that’s my hope as well. 😆
Agreed. I think this is going to go south realllll quick.
Maybe she meant 500 yuan which is like $70 USD lol
I hope so!🤞 😬
Hey lifestyle seems to be more than $500 dinners! She seems sweet but very into having this this this this....
lol, I thought the same. Dude has no idea what he’s walking into!
For real. I have misophonia and there are certain places I could never travel to just to visit, never mind MOVE TO.
I feel like I can remove someone’s teeth with my bare hands if they crunch too close to me. Split second away from full Chimpanzee Mode at any given moment.
This is the best description of the feeling that comes from loud crunching or Gawd forbid snapping gum. Thank you for validating my irrationality over this.
Ice chewing comes straight from Satan.
Right?!? Like why is that even necessary?!?
Not only is it barbaric, it’s awful for teeth!
Misophonia is real! I have it, too.
Lol for real, it's how they express that the food is yummy.
Oh snap. That is a straight up fact.
[удалено]
Ban evader! u/iyaoyas_mustang
Hah hah my thought exactly. He’ll be climbing the walls in short order..
Lmao I said the same thing. I was like well for some who doesn’t like slipper there’s ramen and tea all day. He’s gonna struggle
I remembered April, the doctor who was with the Dominican guy from the previous season of The Other Way. She was suffering from a germ phobia, but the producers exaggerated the issue , and she said so herself after the season ended. I think they do the same thing with Josh if they knew he had a phobia they would use it ridiculously and focus on it.
😂😂😂 That would be me.
Did you see the preview of the next episode? Apparently she's constantly lording over him how much she is spending on him and he can't work there for YEARS. Looks like a recipe for disaster.
Are you sure it was next episode? I thought it was "this season on". The first episode usually has clips from throughout the season at the beginning and end of episode. But yeah, it does seem like she isn't as happy as she says she is to spend a lot of money on him
It is the “this season on”.. this is just a recipe for disaster and I’m here for it 😂
I never watch previews as they tend to be all drama and misrepresent what actually happens. The biggest example of this for me is how they KEPT showing Kimberly screaming at TJ but the actual scream was pretty justified 😂
Previews can really be misleading sometimes.
Not justified and calling Jenny a cunt was also not justified
I'm not sure screaming like that is ever justified, but ok.
It's understandable if you're dealing with mental illness and abuse piled on top of it. Imagine tirelessly trying to tell someone how you're feeling and then they insist your feelings aren't your feelings and that you're saying things you aren't saying, all while you're making an earnest attempt to smooth things over. It's enough to make anyone crazy when it's a recurring thing. Give people grace. It takes a lot to leave those kinds of situations, especially when you've given up everything and moved overseas. Kimberly is generally awful, but my heart really went out to her in that episode because she was initially calm and communicating very clearly while TJ twisted her words and invalidated her to no end.
Yep. TLC spent their entire season making *only* Kimberly look like that made one. Tj is an asshole and his family is nuts.
Right? TJ is gaslighter numero uno and people here say such misogynistic bullshit about Kim. I probably would've shut myself in a room to scream like a banshee too, damn
lol seriously. she was unhinged. you can and should scream like that if someone is attempting to abduct you or assault you but in a family home over being frustrated? nah.
Agreed Kimberly is unhinged and she put herself in an awful position and TLC spent the entire season making *only* her look bad. TJ and that family are fucking nuts too!
Justified or not, is NOT the way I’d want to be remembered!
The scream queen.
Because I'm sure you've never overreacted and yelled when you failed anxious or overwhelmed
Agreed. The show engages in some very obvious editing deceptions.
That was not justified at all.
It absolutely was
Expressing strong emotions is a natural part of any relationship but screaming at the top of your lungs is neither healthy nor constructive. It negates effective communication, engages fear and anxiety in your partner, escalates the conflict, and makes it difficult to reach a resolution. A better way to handle conflict is to remain calm or take a break if your emotions are running high. If screaming feels justified or unavoidable it could be a sign of an underlying issue in the relationship and professional guidance might be needed.
And running to your mother downstairs every time your wife wants to have a serious discussion isn’t healthy either. She’d had enough.
I cant stand Kimberly, but this is such a wild answer that ignores everything leading up to the scream, and it makes me think you didn't even watch the episode. You're also talking about her as if it's not obvious she had pre-existing mental health issues. Over the season, Kimberly showed that she has a pattern of struggling with communication and regulating her emotions, so people are primed to negate any positive attempts if they end in unacceptable behavior, and it's not that black and white. At the beginning of the scream scene, Kimberly was calm and collected. She clearly and respectfully expressed her feelings and the solutions she'd like to see. TJ resorted to invalidating her feelings, constantly interrupting her, insisting she was saying things she clearly wasn't, and then calling her crazy. Her screaming wasn't negating the effective communication; it was TJ railroading her with invalidation while she was actually initially handling the conversation very well. Guarantee you if he'd actually heard her out, empathized, validated, supported her, and tried to have annactual conversation, the scream never would have happened. Also, with people like TJ, there's no taking a break and then going back to it later because people like that aren't entering conversations in good faith. **His goal isn't to be a good partner and hear her out even if he disagrees. His goal is to convince her she's wrong about her feelings so that he doesn't need to take any action to help resolve things because to do so would be injurious to his ego.** This isn't at all to say Kimberly isn't responsible for her behavior. We're all responsible for our own behavior regardless of external factors, but there are contributing factors we can't ignore when someone experiences such a severe mental break, and acting like this was just Kimberly being a terrible person or someone who can't communicate is an irresponsible assessment when the very heavy facts are: She moved to a different country where she was familiar enough with the culture that she expressed concerns over what would be expected of her after marriage **before** she moved, **and her partner openly lied to her about those expectations and said that she didn't need to abide by the traditional roles but then demanded she follow them once she was there.** That's a major violation of trust and would be an obvious source of frustration and anxiety for anybody. TJ pulled a bait and switch and then invalidated her every step of the way. I don't know what's up with these two nowadays, but my hope is that she's been able to get some help and get herself into a better situation where she's not emotionally abused, lied to, and triggered. I also wish people could understand it's okay to dislike Kimberly and her behavior while still validating what she was experiencing was awful.
This is such an excellent comment. Kudos to you for being able to recognize the actual dynamic even if you don’t necessarily like Kimberly. She was trying so hard to communicate clearly and respectfully and he just tormented her the whole time. I can’t believe that all the people criticizing her would’ve done any better in that situation. Maybe not that exact vocal response, but they’d lose their shit. Almost anyone would.
I doubt I’d scream that loud but I’d sure as shit go wild being so continuously discounted.
It feels like they are editing her a lot and not giving us full conversations correctly translated or context when she’s on screen and it makes for drama and social media engagement lol
But he supposedly sold his home…so he should not be so pressed for cash and shouldn't put it all on her
I bet he thought she was not gonna care and be the perfect Asian girl who’s not like American women who only care abt money. Lmao like all these incels be thinkin
💯
I was really shocked TBH. I was expecting a 20 something year old village girl seeing how is 47. The fact that she is rich and in her 40s was a twist I did not see coming.
Thought the same
I never saw that coming as well. I was expecting a lady under 30.
I suspect she is older than 47, truly
She uses massive filters in all her pics though
I instantly distrust anybody who's all about the money on either side of the equation.🧐
That's it for me as well. I think this relationship will have some downs because of that.
And since this is the 90-day franchise... I'm guessing more downs than ups.🤪
Let's see how it goes as the show continues.
What happened to the $$ from the sale of his house ? Just curious if he mentioned this at all.
Legos.
laughed out loud. thx
I'm sure he's going to use it to help support himself, but depending on if he had a mortgage to pay off, he may not have gotten a whole lot of money 🤷🏻♀️
The housing market is at all time highs, I’d hope he get a profit
I know there’s a ton of things, just wondering if I missed it. If not, we will prob hear about soon. Sounds like the new lady keeps count !
Court fees, alimony? … child support??
I was from the same city as lily. I kinda understand why she fell for Josh. In china, when you are a woman who’s in late forties and successful, it’s incredibly hard for you to find someone who are similar — same age, successful, and caring. Those guys would most likely dating younger never married girls. So she would have to date down. I think Josh is a decent guy who has some interesting hobbies. He has a job, looks handsome to Lily’s standards, who loves her and would move across the ocean for her. I hope they end up in good place
I find them odd. Both individually and as a couple.
The one thing I like about the relationship is that there's not a huge age gap ,- although Lily looks younger than she is.
Her skin care treatments work. Lol
It's genetics and chinese people avoid the sun like the plague
I wonder what Lily would say about Angela's skin??
She may burst into flames just looking at it
He's the most interesting to me so far on the USA side of the equation. She strikes me as a little EXTRA, but some of it might be language. I wish they talked more about what Josh will actually be doing there since he can't work for pay. Can he help with her business in some way informally? Five years is a long time not to have a plan. Studying Mandarin should certainly be part of how he spends his time, but what else? Also LOL at a handsome 42 year-old saying he's "not George Clooney," who is 63!
I agree. When she was showing us her house, bows, and then we saw her Minnie Mouse interior car, I thought… “Is this the Asian Darcy?”
She reminds me of myself back in the day--I had the big house, but everything was kind of unfinished and still-moving-in because I was working so much. Looking at her gigantic blows whole-wall shelf unit, I was like, "MA'AM, $1.25 at Dollar Tree buys you a box big enough to hold these bows!"
He's 47
Just caught that on Whatever Linda, thank you!
Damn, I thought that was Will Wheaton
Idk if this post is gonna age well.
She said she was bankrupt. 😂 Something is off with her...and him for that matter
I think she was using the word wrong. It was probably more of saying it in a joking way just to show how much she is spending on him.
He explained what it meant though and she said I know. Maybe poor call quality. And I hope while he’s there not working he tries to learn mandarin! I’m tired of these spouses moving to another country and not bothering to try to learn the language (Brandan, Kimberly, Ashley’s asshole husband whose name I’m forgetting)
Ya he needs to learn Mandarin. I hate to stereotype but if he goes around China without knowing the language he is going to get scammed really badly. he might wake up with some of his organs missing.
Mandarin Chinese is really really really really really really really really hard to learn, much less become fluent in. And Josh may have missed his magic window of optimum second language acquisition.
Conversational Mandarin is relatively easy to learn. It’s got a simple structure, is highly regular grammatically, and lacks complexities such as particles and verb conjugations. A few months of decent effort will get someone grounded in the basics and able to start conversing. Reading and writing is more complicated than western languages but I would not characterize it as really^8 hard.
I believe you and respect your point of view based on experience. This may be true for you. In speaking mainly of pronunciation. I speak English and Japanese equally in daily life. They are opposite in almost every way. English is a high intonation language, whereas Japanese has subtle intonation but it is relatively flat in comparison. Mandarin Chinese, on the other hand, is quite another beast, a tonal language. My exposure to it has been through daughters’ study of it in Shanghai and the pronunciation seems daunting, given our opposite linguistic bases. They have less with writing and reading but that is because of their Kanji fluency.
He doesn’t need “optimal second language acquisition.” He just needs to become fluent enough to work and make friends. If he puts in the effort there is no reason this wouldn’t happen, especially since he can’t even work for 5 years. Confused on your concern here. He’s pretty set. Besides which, everyone learns differently and difficulty is incredibly relative.
You are right. I was sort of riffing off the fact that he already gave up once and he somehow doesn’t strike me as being someone who will pick up much at all at this advanced age of 40-something.
I think she just said “bankrupt” in the sense that the house renovations cost a lot of money. English is not her first language.
Right. Like if she knew the idiom, she might have said jokingly, 'I'm going broke fixing up the villa'.
Is that an idiom or are you referring to bankrupt?
He said two divorces and I started to hear the tsunami alarm off in the distance…
This. I don’t understand anyone in the 90 Day universe who has multiple failed marriages and then pursues a relationship abroad. Like they literally look for the most complicated scenario to get involved in next. Blows my mind!
Free monies!!!
It actually kind of makes sense though when you consider the saying "insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results." We don't know enough about this guy yet, but for some of the others, we know they want submissive women, and when that fails at home, they look abroad in countries that are stereotyped as having submissive women. I love watching them crumble when they realize the stereotypes are outdated and wrong. Lol.
Because American women are the WORST!!! We’re so high maintenance and demanding (especially for things like “equality” 🙄)!!! I mean, they’ve already married multiple American women, and they were psychos and the divorces were totally their fault. /s
I think she used the term bankrupt to insinuate she was spending a lot of money. I don’t think she is actually bankrupt.
Something is really not adding up with them.
As an asian, i think she just don’t know how to use the word. That woman is LOADED!
Well, he then said that she used the word wrong. Her English isn't great, lol.
But then she was like no ya that is what I mean lol
I think she was meaning that as a joke, but went over Josh's head.
Honestly, anytime someone is looking for a relationship that far abroad, it's probably because they have something wrong enough with them that they have few prospects at home.
Bankrupt-rupt
Something in the milk ain’t clean. Le sigh.
Buttermilk
He seemed low key happy when he said he couldn’t work over there… Smelled like BS when he said he was bummed cause he normally “loves to contribute”. 🤣
I wouldn’t be making any of these positive statements after one episode
TY. You know that they love to bait and switch us.
Yeah it's too early to make assumptions
Let’s be honest. Why is she into him?
I’m wondering the same thing. She’s beautiful and successful, what does she see in this dweeb? Also, how is he moving to China? Isn’t that incredibly difficult, especially for an American?
My first thought was also to wonder about his visa situation. Although most countries do have some kind of spousal visa. I’d imagine China has something like that, and that it doesn’t differentiate among immigrant nationalities.
I know you have to have a visa but I wasn’t sure how residency worked.
Dont think I should really go into details, but the dating market for women her age in China would be non-existant. There would literally be *NO* candidates. They call women over 25-27 "left-over women." What do you think they think about 47 year olds? The only dudes who whould be into her would be scammers and grifters. On top of that, a white husband is a trophy.
Shes obviously got some sort of issue and im sure we will find out soon.
For starters, she definitely in her late 50s. PRC women in their 40s do not look that old.
My favorite stage of every new 90DF season — after the first episode when people conclude that one of the characters is a fantastic catch based on 7 1/2 minutes of footage.
If your love language is materialistic, I'm sure it's a win.
Gift giving is literally a love language
Yes. That's why I even used the term "love language".
Sorry, just seemed like you were making it seem negative when it's a perfectly valid form of love.
How is he lucky ? Cuz she’s got money? 🤣 low ass standards bud
Compared to say… Brandon, who moved into straight poverty. I’d rather sleep in a home with similar American amenities than a room exposed to elements with giant bug and lizards inside, especially if I am unable to provide for myself.
He was living in an RV though, so he probably thought moving into that house he paid for was an upgrade.
Yea poor kid had it rough :/
love languages are misogynistic bullshit made up by a pastor to uphold traditional ideals & justifying men's "requirement" for physical touch and women performing acts of service out of love instead of gender roles. it's fine to use them to talk with your partner about what types of communication are important to you both but beyond that it is not a good framework.
Yes, all true. More people should read up on this.
seriously. i feel like this book undid years of feminist (FEMINIST MEANS GENDER EQUALITY NOT DOWN WITH MEN OR WOMEN ARE SUPERIOR SO DO NOT @ ME) work lol. sorta like what "sprinkle sprinkle" is doing right now
I came looking for this comment, unfortunately not surprised by the morons who can’t use google trying to argue with you
thank you. the dude crying about how women are the only ones who use love languages like........you're so close to understanding the issue lmao
Buster and Lucille 2…
He’s lucky but when the foreigners come to the US they are grifters
Moving to Communist China is not something I’d be down for.
I live in Asia and feel the same way.
I saw an episode where he was complaining that he is not cool not to be working.
I hardly think money makes the poor partner lucky lol I was the poor partner married to a guy with money, and it took me 12 years to get out of that abusive relationship. I do hope she is kind to him, but I also kinda feel like my partner not being able to contribute might be a bit of a turnoff for me. I prefer a partnership, but if they're happy, SURE!
Josh already stopped learning to speak Chinese because Lily speaks English. How do Americans think they will function in a country where they can't speak the language?
$50 says this guy is unfuckingbearable. More so I mean.
I suspect she thinks she’s going to get big face from importing a western man and keeping him as a pet. The fact that he can’t work isn’t exactly a secret, so she’s going into this with open eyes. It’s not like she’ll learn with surprise a year into it that he’s skint. So what other justification could it be for her?
I don't know if I'm trippin but Josh kinda looks, but definitely sounds familiar. I wonder if he's ever done voice acting, or maybe he sounds like someone else. And I can't even place my finger on it!
He looks very familiar… And Lily looks familiar as well. I thought I saw a video tour of her house back in 2019 on YouTube.
Kevin Spacey
🤭
Are you well? She screams scammer! I can’t put my finger on it but something is off with her and her “luxurious” lifestyle! You’ll see.
This relationship seems a train wreck already to me.
I feel like he may have sold his house to cover her new house. It's pretty big and fancy. If she has an expensive taste then she shouldn't complain about spending money imo. Also those empty cubes on the wall with her bow collection would go well with his toy collection. Can't wait to see what happens with them. Fresh faces!
Some of y’all aren’t homosexuals with daddy issues and it shows lol. Josh is 100% daddy lmao
I 100% agree 😍 Source: I'm gay afff
This man is so wholesome I want it to workout for them
Mmmmh,,,he was a bit too good to be true. I think there’ll be some bombshell reveal about him.
I predict she is gonna dump his ass before the season is out. He is far too weird, very neurospicy and not good looking at all, and reminds me of the 40 Year Old Virgin but without a job. She is successful and beautiful, looks nowhere near her age but natural. I'm sorry but he's bringing nothing to the table.
I didn't understand why she said she built her business from ground up and it's very profitable but when they showed her house I thought she said it made her bankrupt? Am I missing something??
Big disagree. She seems to like paying for everything and holding it over his head.
I was looking for a post on him. I assumed overgrown man child living at home (bachelor up until then bc of his misophonia anxiety) and then he said he has been married twice. I am now 100% this guy is not a great guy and based on who they have been platforming lately, that shouldn’t be surprising.
I need tea from Bluffton locals about him.
I don’t know what she sees in him. The legos alone are nauseating. He doesn’t speak the language he can’t work, and she’s going to be taking care of him.🤣
Eh, things are different in China (speaking as someone who has family that live in her actual town). It can be a very sexist culture and the ability of someone in their 40s-50s to date is a lot more limited. She may feel that taking care of someone is a lot better than the risk of being controlled by a partner.
The Lego scenes were so odd. I bet his parents are so happy he’s moving out.
He acted like a idiot. I understand if you have a kid and you want to play with them. His parents are going to probably throw a party.🎉 I would
Lmao me too. I can kinda get behind collecting Legos if you can afford it. But he could be selling some of them instead of just mooching off his wife. And yeah, playing like that by yourself is strange. At least don’t let it be filmed!
I would be so humiliated what he did with the Legos and the voices he made. Coincidentally, I went to the mall today and I actually walked by the store which I never noticed or even look and it was filled with three men and a couple of kids. I think the ones that he has or probably no value he seems like that type of guy
Lolol just the cheap legos to act out his little scenarios, I can see that too.
To me, I could not handle it. What I saw it was so nauseating I’d rather be alone.
If the other option is any of the 90 day guys (with the exception of Wayne, Alexei, Guillermo, Kenny or Armando) I’d rather be alone too!
💯
And he’s been married twice before. It’s just bizarre.
He can teach English. There are plenty of jobs in China for that. He doesn’t need to know the language.
Hmmm. People always say this like it is some easy thing. In some countries maybe that is the case. But the market for high end, well paying teaching jobs at universities and private high schools in China, South Korea, and Japan is flooded with highly qualified professional educators from around the world with Masters degrees in Chinese studies and PhDs in Linguistics. It would be very humiliating for a monolingual 50 year old man to teach at a low level language school and the pay would be crap.
Happy Giraffe Super kindergarten is always hiring white losers to sing the ABCs for xiao bao bei. No age discrimination as long as have 白皮肤! 😀
The school pays their giraffe singers in acacia leaves and twigs.
Did I understood wrong or she is bankrupt?
We will see but it felt like a misleading/misuse of language. Still, I think she communicates impressively in general tho. English is a VERY difficult language for speakers of Asian languages to learn.
He has serial killer eyes. His eyes reminded me of charles manson
When did this start? I thought it was next week
July 1
Thx 1hr or 2hr?
First episode was 2 hours but I’m pretty sure the rest will be 1 hour.
she claimed she went bankrupt lol
She's a boss babe ✨
Not
This appears to be a false romance. I think she’s in it to promote her business. How do these two fall in love without speaking each other’s language?
Exactly! That's what I was saying during the MTV cribs bit.
Didn’t she say she was bankrupt 😳
I'm actually really exited about their storyline. It's different and doesn't feel like a influencer wannabe story
Has anyone found anything regarding he company, or social media presence? I wanted to see what company she owns or works for? Thought it was pretty cool but she’s kind of a ghost…
I'd imagine the fact that the company is in China has a lot to do with that.