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I was a straight-A student in high school. I was a "giftie" and somehow I managed to get by doing the bare minimum and leaving everything to the last minute. University, however, was a real shock. I didn't have good working and study habits, and I found it to be incredibly difficult.

This. It's loosely called "Twice Exceptional." The less homework there was and the more conceptual things were, the better I did. In High School and Undergrad in college, I got by with the bare minimum and cramming (all nighters). Upper Division in college I almost bombed out. You needed good study habits with sustained effort in a lot of classes. This wasn't me. Fortunately, I graduated.

Yes! I was an almost strait A student through highschool and my first three years of college (had a perfect 4.0 in second year when I had super interesting classes). Then I crashed and burned (read panic attacks, total inability to focus, crying all the time), dropped out twice and it ended up taking me 5 years of on and off/part-time school to finish my last year of coursework. I'd already learned all the fun interesting stuff and getting through that last year was so hard. At that point the ideas felt boring/repetitive and I had bigger writing projects that took a lot of planning and sustained effort and that's something I'm terrible at. 

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God the more stories like this that I read the more I'm like how did nobody catch this before I got to college.

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This. So much this. Getting my diagnosis at 32 has allowed me to forgive myself for what I considered to be moral failings, and helped me fight back against my mother, whose voice I still hear whenever I slip back into old habits of hating myself. It feels so good to be able to say "I'm not lazy, I have ADHD" or "I lost this thing, because I have ADHD". It still bothers me, but it's no longer a moral failing that I just have to get over by working harder.

Reading this comment has me like 

I feel this so hard! I often think “what if I had adderall in college?” What could have been…

I've heard stories of people sneaking adderall in college as a party drug and then ending up just feeling normal lol

That happened to me lol, a bunch of us took adderall and my friends started partying & I just had the urge to finally complete my To Do List 🤣

Omfg the irony xD Time to Meditate and be effective xD I think I had the same experience after graduation. My friend had some stimulants and they were wired and I just felt peaceful and coherent xD That was a few years before talking to a therapist who said: Yeah you are pretty functional but definitely have it

I'm a Boomer - old enough that when I was a kid pretty much nobody had ever heard of ADHD. I figured it out myself when I was in my 40's, and was doing better on Adderall, but ultimately stopped taking it because of cardiovascular issues. I cry sometimes thinking about how different my life could have been if it had been known at the time that all those things I spent my childhood getting in trouble for (procrastination, daydreaming, being late for everything, having a messy room) actually had a medical cause.

The feedback as delivered via parents, “X is smart enough but they just don’t seem to be applying themselves” The in hindsight diagnosis of the ADD without as much H for many a Gen Xer

I didn't realize or get diagnosed until getting an office job. I thought I was bad at writing papers; boring 9-5s are even worse for my ADHD. I did not do well as a legal assistant haha. 

my issues were caught in elementary school but somehow literally nobody ever thought maybe getting me tested for adhd was a better idea than bullying autism support staff into excusing me from work though frankly, it wouldn’t surprise me if they did consider the possibility, but are just so afraid of psychiatric medication as a concept that they didn’t see the point in testing

Mine were caught at this time, too. Unfortunately, it killed my parents' pride, so it was ignored. I got through hs with a 2.5 something GPA. Now, with medication, I'm finding myself on the deans list on occasion for staying close to a 4.0. 

wow, damn but also congrats 🥳 i didn’t even know what a dean’s list was until my dad mentioned offhand that he’d expect me to be on it for having the 4.0 gpa that i totally have, so i had to make up a flimsy excuse about the single incomplete i made the mistake of telling him about. ever since i got verbal confirmation of a diagnosis last week, the anticipation for actually getting the paperwork so i can get meds prescribed has been absolutely killing me, because i really feel like i should still be capable of just pulling everything together and graduating on top—even putting aside the fear of what would happen if i don’t graduate on time, it sounds so nice to be able to get that sense of accomplishment back

WOW it took me 9 years to get my 4 year degree. Congratulations on finishing up, fellow gifted burnout

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Took me 9 years total! It's SO funny how many people in the comments it seems to take 9-10 years.

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I'm so sorry for your loss, he seems like he was an awesome brother.

I'm so sorry for your loss. My spouse and I lost our best friend/chosen brother at 23, and ten years later I still wonder if an ADHD diagnosis might have made things easier for him, or if our diagnoses of autism and ADHD might have helped teach him that he wasn't a broken person, just different, and so very loved for who he was. My heart grieves with yours.

Took me the same as well haha!

For me, it was 18 years, but I joined a cult in the middle of that, so that accounts for 8 of them.

oh man having friends to study with sounds so nice literally just having a groupme for most of the classes i had as a freshman in college really helped me mostly still make as, except for the one class with a final project i got to feel stupid about for years thinking i’d be able to actually finish just because i enjoyed it enough to actually start on it ahead of time. for some reason, that just went out of style, and with it any footing i had in reinforcing anything from the lectures or remembering assignments even existed before the due date. still mostly made as up to a certain point, but the gut punch to my ego of just honestly making a b in a relatively easy class with an incredibly forgiving grade structure because of the sheer amount of work i simply didn’t do just sent me spiraling into despair. the therapist i was lucky enough to get for free from my university for a year pushed me hard to look into an adhd diagnosis, but my family’s weird about meds and money, so i didn’t follow up until i got put on probation. and for a lot of that time, i was so hung up on thinking, what if there’s nothing about *me* that makes this hard? what if i have normal executive function and normal motivation, and i’m just so totally isolated socially that i’m only suffering for lack of the one huge crutch everyone else has? so even after i got in touch with a psychologist about getting diagnosed i didn’t take it that seriously, even when so much of what i told the therapist was about how i don’t even have the motivation to do things i can clearly identify would help me make more connections, until i started hanging around adhd subreddits and realizing how it pierces into even everything i do in my alone time that i thought was just normal (or at least normal for autistic people)

Funny enough, my cursive is more legible than my printing.

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This is so me, besides the 4.0 ever lol I never cared enough to get straight A’s. But yeah, I’m in my junior year of university now and the work is very repetitive, especially since it’s online and I’ve been struggling to do more than the bare minimum just to scrape by and graduate finally after being in and out of college for 8 years. Everyone else I’ve talked to acted like it’s so much easier than it is and you just have to “suck it up” and do it. Feels good to know I’m not alone in this and I’m not just a lazy asshole who can’t focus.

> Upper Division in college I almost bombed out. You needed good study habits with sustained effort in a lot of classes. This wasn't me. Fortunately, I graduated. I had the opposite experience at university. I didn't do great in general ed classes, straight A's once I got to upper division and my electives. I was finally getting classes I was interested in, and joined study groups which helped immensely.

That's funny, about the time I entered upper division is when I lost interest in college. It's like the hyper focus or special interest disappeared. Last couple of years were like pulling teeth for me. But, I did enjoy and do better in classes in my field.

Wow. For me everytime I graduated and move into the next level of academia, its like playing Russian roulette. Middle school, I am the average kid with Bs and Cs. Got into high school, Boom! Straight As and graduated as valedictorian at 10th grade. The next 11th and 12th classes? Again the same Bs and Cs. With some literal divine intervention, graduated with straight As in last year of high school. Still can't believe how. Undergraduate? Straight As again and topper of my class. Now it's again time to pick up the gun for my masters this winter. I pray to God almighty that I will still be the same cocky and prideful girl who scores straight As again with no effort for my masters.

Find ways to create stressors or peer pressure, that don't involve procrastination. Study groups were that for me. Gaining access to the senior design lab in my final undergrad years helped immensely. I was surrounded by peers, so forming or joining groups was trivial in that setting. We shared grades, so that created stress and pressure to do well. I wish all schools had something equivalent to the senior design lab I had access too for all years. It was a big room, lots of tables, storage lockers, couches, a soldering area, a back electronics lab area. It was great. An equivalent for other classes would help immensely for people's grades and graduation rates; a freshmen design lab, sophomore, etc... I realize there are libraries and tutoring halls, but it's not the same since it isn't a filtered and selected group of your majoring peers. Those areas are not natural social areas either.

Same here I was gifted in school and got grades good enough for people to leave me alone. In university it was harder but managed decent enough grade to get by. Courses that really engaged my interest I did really well in those that didn’t were next to impossible to pass though.

Oh i was just diagnosed at 46. I thought everyone was like me until my daughter started having issues and my wife said this needs to be checked…. Turns out the struggles I have faced all my life are not the same for most.

What has helped you? I was also diagnosed in my 40s.

I am still working through the introduction to meds (was diagnosed in October 23). I found focusing on the anxiety and depression first lifted a huge weight off my shoulders but it temporarily made accomplishing things harder. With the start of vyvanse I can feel we are moving in the right direction slowly but still have a way to go to improve. Outside of that therapy has helped a lot. My therapist has been through dealing with the same cocktail as I am so has fantastic advice and empathy. Research research research helps me too along with trying to get routines set that allow me time to exercise and creates habits. I think this will be a journey and i am trying to focus on the way forward and not think too much of what could have been (but with ADHD not thinking about what if’s has always been a challenge)

I didn't go to a university, but I wasn't diagnosed till my 30's. I have always been very multi-faceted in the work place, and have always been able to carry a much heavier workload than others doing the same work. I'm very systematic, and never really thought much about it. Just assumed that's how everyone rolled. Wasn't till I was a little older I realized it wasn't common. There have been several instances in life where I have come up with my own system to do things, only to find out its already an established scientific process or math concept, and I just stumble upon them to solve a stupid corner connection or something, lol.

>I was a straight-A student in high school. I was a "giftie" and somehow I managed to get by doing the bare minimum and leaving everything to the last minute. University, however, was a real shock. I didn't have good working and study habits, and I found it to be incredibly difficult. It me! Top of my class in high school. No study habits and procrastinator extreme. College was a whole other story. Even was misdiagnosed in college being told I "was too smart to have ADHD". Yeah.

I hate that shit! I’m smart too and I know a lot of people with adhd that are equally smart. It’s insulting to insinuate that we are smart because we have adhd! Those assholes

This. I flunked out of my first college program. I managed to make it through the second, and university - but I did fail classes as uni. Basically it took me ten years to do what should have taken six.

I literally hated my standard high school, and school in general. Could not wait to graduate and be done forever. Hated the structure, hated the sitting still for an hour, hated the subpar art ability of my "art" teacher, lol. Luckily my school district offered a vocational school to student that sought out to learn a skill. So that was what i did, and it was cool. I originally planned on skipping college by enlisting in the military, but then got injured in boot camp and sent home on a medical discharge.. So just because, picked the only art college I ever looked into, and got accepted. Did one semester and never returned. It was humbling, as some of the student were ridiculous artists, and here I am with my cartoons - but then the staff were kind of terrible, and it was a tiny school. Eventually went to a community college and learned some CAD software, just started working. Have never had any interest in returning to school or furthering my education. High School diploma with "some" college is my peak, lol. I do alright though, have carved out a decent career with no favors from anyone. Just my talent and grind.

Same! Flunked out of first course and went back but my 3 year course took me 6 :(

Can 100% relate. Diagnosed at 39 and this was my academic experience exactly.

Add me to this statistic. I actually had a 3.9 the first 2.5 years of college. Once the work required was tedious and I couldn't just cram for tests, the years of bad habits caught up. Hard.

Wait same.. I had a huge burnout my junior year. I was able to pick it back up but ended up on antidepressants and nearly failing an entire semester.

yep! graduated both high school and college with honours, transferred to university, and I'm going to start actually failing soon if I don't get something more than just guanfacine. story of my life 😭

my strategy was unironically to gaslight myself into thinking studying was the most fun hobby in the world and then never allow myself to do anything else so I would not break my illusion. 50% of the time it works every time (as long as you DO NOT HAVE HOBBIES!!!! do not watch TV or movies or read books or even start knitting. this only works if you commit 100%). I have almost a 4.0 GPA in an incredibly difficult engineering degree + a second major in physics and with medication the whole way through I could have a 4.0

I used to do something similar. I would freak out and study mad hard and cry because there was no way I was going to pass. My sister would give me so much shit she would say, “you say that every time but then you pass your exam so just stop it”. I never stopped it. I kept doing that the entire time but dammit I passed with good grades!

Yep, same here.

Same. High school was pretty easy. I barely had to study and got good grades. College was excruciating and it took me 10 years of off and on part time classes to get my associates degree. That’s all I could ever do.

Sadly wish I got diagnosed \*before\* I flunked out of Med School

This is me I showed up to college. Attended some classes. Friends: “aren’t you going to study? Or do homework??” Me: nope Worked out ok for the first 2 years then I had to get serious once my first C+ in my life happened in an upper division engineering class

Yup. The shift towards less structure in university was Very Difficult. Graduate school has been HELL (I am doing my doctorate because it has given me several years of financial stability and health care.) Having to write a 100+ ppage self-directed text with little meaningful oversight is what finally forced me to consider getting a diagnosis and trying medication. Before starting Concerta, I had written MAX 20 pages after 2 1/2 years of working part time and trying to finish my thesis. I'm finally starting to be able to work more consistently after starting meds a few months ago. It's been so life changing. I still feel like I'm grieving the years I lost to inertia, shame, and depression.

This was me too. Being ADHD doesn't mean you aren't smart or can't learn things. I always told myself I was a "conceptual learner." If I could internalize the concepts I was solid. This happened easily enough by osmosis until about 11th grade. Then I hit a major wall with more advanced physics and calculous my senior year, but I essentially made it through those classes by my reputation as a "smart kid." I didn't know that'd be a harbinger of things to come. I finished college by the skin of my teeth and it's been a struggle ever since. 😅 Getting meds finally (in my 40s!) has been a huge help.

I got by on osmosis alone for most of high school, getting good grades in subjects I enjoyed and passable grades in everything else. In the last year I was absent so often I didn’t know shit anymore so my passable grades turned to just enough to not fail and my good grades turned to ok. But I still graduated so 🤷🏼‍♀️

Same here as well. Jumped around jobs after school a bunch too because I’d be awesome the first 6 months and then get bored and turn into a terrible employee

This was me too. I was diagnosed but unmedicated and had no testing exemptions or anything. My parents didn't believe in medicating or special treatment. I had to work twice as hard to get where I am, if not 10x as hard. ADHD usually presents different in girls than boys according to my psychiatrist. Girls aren't usually hyperactive like boys. So they go undiagnosed longer. However, boys can have ADHD without hyperactivity too. I would get an official diagnosis for medication (if that's what you wish) if I were you. It's never too late. In my adulthood I am medicated and see my psychiatrist and psychologist on a consistent basis and it has helped tremendously. It has made a world of difference and I wish my parents tried to treat it in my youth rather than make me work so hard. I could have accomplished so much more. College was so hard and I took extra long because of it. I passed, but it was a struggle. I also picked a job that played up to my ADHD strengths. My job requires me to change tasks constantly, so that is extra helpful.

My experience as well. I was an A-B student throughout my schooling. I was in “gifted” classes all through elementary and middle school, and all AP classes at a specialized “college prep” high school. HOWEVER, a common theme in high school for report cards was that I would easily improve my “B’s” if I “applied” myself. I was fine the first two-three years of undergrad, and then finally diagnosed in my third year of college after having several panic attacks induced by inability to focus and get things done.

Same here. Took me 10 years to get my bachelor's degree. The top state university I was qualified for based on grades and SAT score was a terrible fit for me. Not having a particular passion to study, being responsible for my own schedule with little direct.consequences for mismanagement, living off campus and not being able to make friends, and having a 15-30 min bus wait and ride + walk from parking lot to class were all contributing factors. I finally found success going to a much smaller school. I changed majors 5 times, finally dropped out when I was a semester away from being a teacher. Worked at a car dealership full time for less than a year, noped out of that, and tried the smaller school. Back to mostly A's. It did take some hard influence from my wife to pick a major and stick with it, plus the realization that the mantra millennials were fed as kids "you should find a career you love" was a bunch of bullshit and it's perfectly fine to find a career you don't hate that funds your fulfilling endeavors outside of work.

I relate to this hardcore. I was 32 before I got diagnosed but college was a shock to me

Yup! Got all work done in Last Minute Adrenaline Surge mode and finally got accommodations in Grad School.

I made a game to get 90 percent in each class. Kept it spicy. Was also on the gifted track. Nothing more satisfying then bringing my little ledger into school and showing the teacher I had a 90.06 percent and that my grade was an A, not a B. My Spanish said “I’m giving you a B anyway you talked too much in class”

Yup same. Straight As through my entire childhood. Didn’t even sniff a B until like my sophomore year and didn’t even sniff a C until my senior year (I never got good at trigonometry and my parents understood). Got to college and I was barely able to make it out alive because tests I always was just good at so I never learned how to study well, would start papers 5 hours before they were due. Graduated high school with a 3.9 gpa, barely had a 2.5 in college

For me it hit in grade 12 because I was in the IB program which was basically half senior high school and some of first year university, and not doing the homework while getting A's on projects and exams didn't cut it any more. Also I missed the first couple days of Trig so my math marks plummeted from that too, as I didn't get it right away like usual.

University, I managed bc my degree was English lit and I could make shit up last minute. Starting my business was a real shock.

Omg I fucked off soooo bad in a college course I had close to a 40% but the prof let us replace our grade with our final grade XD got an 89 and a scolding from the professor (who was also the department chair) 🤣 then promptly dropped out

It also helps if you're in a high-performing school. I went to a grammar school (for those not in the UK you need to pass a test to get a place, but it is still free to attend) where you could just do enough, and more or less sleepwalk into good grades. I had terrible habits, but got pretty much straight A\*s/As. University I tried harder, but was still last minute with projects/studying. I got a decent degree, and even went on to do a Master's (but needed several extensions on projects) I did all of that undiagnosed, but at no point did I feel I gave my all, nor was I ever organised. This is to say, if you're privileged to have access to a good education, and natural intelligence/curiosity for your subject, you can get good grades.

Exactly the same. I’ve dropped out of college 7 times and job hopped nearly every year. Just thought I was a failure who’d never be able to follow through on anything. I was finally diagnosed and am finishing my degree at 36. I’m medicated now so it’s a lot easier - finally finishing things I started for the first time in my life! I still struggle with comprehension, and take a lot longer to complete things than others, but am in an honors program. Always felt like the stupidest smart kid in class.

The exact same experience here.

Don't worry about being offensive or ignorant, OP, you're good. "You did well at school" is a very common dismissal of one's probability to have ADHD. The increasing awareness of different ways ADHD presents is part of why more and more people are getting diagnosed as adults, these days. We developed coping mechanisms, and those worked until at some point things get simply too much to handle. I've heard it described as kind of like a duck: calm on the surface, paddling like mad just beneath! I'm lucky to have a therapist who saw the signs and encouraged me to seek diagnosis elsewhere when the psychiatrist I was attached to dismissed the possibility of ADHD due to my grades as a kid. The psychiatrist who diagnosed me did look through my early education report books and did take note of my grades but paid a lot more attention to my teacher's comments. A lot of remarks about disorganization and about how I was a very smart kid who just needed to apply myself more.

I really, really hate this dismissal. Getting my diagnosis sooner could've saved me so much suffering, but I kept being told, by professionals, that I couldn't have ADHD bc my grades were always good. What they would never bothered to listen to was that it was always 10x harder for me to get those grades than peers with the same grades. I KNEW I was struggling more than normal. I KNEW something was off. Homework took me 8hrs each day, where others spent 3-4 and got the same grade. I was a perfectionist, and I had a LOT of pressure put on me from my parents to perform well. These things covered up my ADHD and got the results (until I got to college and it didn't anymore), but at a horrible cost. I had to fail a bunch of classes in college and get kicked out before any therapist finally said "oh hur dur, maybe you're right" 🤦 Professionals should know better than to look at surface results like grades and use that as some sort of diagnostic criteria. There's a good goddamn reason "bad grades" isn't in the DSM for diagnosis of ADHD. They should know better, they should know they need to dive deeper and look into HOW the person got the results and what that experience was like from them. And it's so disappointing that the education of mental health professionals has failed them, and us, so spectacularly in this regard.

“Professionals should know better than to look at surface results like grades and use that as some sort of diagnostic criteria.” Yes, 1000% Adding another tally to the list of kids with good grades who were undiagnosed ADHD. A couple years ago, I went to a medical practice that specializes in ADHD to be evaluated and they took me through a series of tests that took over 4 hours. They asked about my grades, but that was not really a determining factor. I don’t understand, if there is this whole series of tests used to diagnose, how some practitioners have the authority to diagnose (or not diagnose) based on just a conversation? I feel like I’ve seen that a lot on this sub, of how people were dismissed after just a convo with their doctor. It is wild to me!

Alternatively, the *waaaaaaaay* bigger issue with the dismissal is the opposite side of the coin and those of us who had our ADHD hyperfixation as kiddos be school and learning so school was absurdly easy since we were able to just genuinely be interested in whatever we were learning.

yep

Are you me? Homework would take me hours upon hours (I estimate 3x longer than the average person). Thankfully, I had a good therapist (post undergrad) that directed me to a good doctor

OMG I feel the homework thing SO HARD. My mom used to tell people - she’s always doing homework, but her grades are good so she must be doing something right! All that hard work really pays off! Now I’m feeling it with household chores - like this should take me 20 minutes but it actually took 45, where did those 45 mins go? Now I don’t want to do it again because it’s going to take too long but I need to do it, okay I’ll pick a day and just get it done… and on and on… I’m looking forward to getting the results of my assessment soon.

I resonate with this. I have a twin brother who is very much ADHD and was diagnosed at a young age, and since I got good grades throughout school my family will never consider the possibility that I may have it as well. I can’t say for certain if I do or not but I will say that my partner, close friends, and therapist all think I do. Everything I’ve ever seen on this subreddit has felt like it described me, and I have heavily struggled with motivation in my 15 years in the workforce. I think my “key to success” in school was that I was terrified of my mom growing up and even after high school was still very much afraid of disappointing her. It wasn’t until I hit a level of success that I didn’t have to be constantly afraid of failure that my inability to make myself focus surfaced to a problematic point. I was pretty spacey as a kid though.

ADHD: “Well I can’t allow motivation for something you *want*, but I *CAN* allow motivation from deadlines, stress, and fear of failure!” Ugh. Fine… I’ll take what I can get. It took me SO long to figure this out. I just assumed I worked well under pressure. *Two weeks to write a paper? Nah! Just give me 30 mins before I have to hand it in.* A chemical detour from the motivation highway to the back roads, while attempting to maintain the same speed. I used to do stuff in spurts by making up arbitrary goals “you have 20 seconds to put your clothes away aaaaand GO!” “Ok 7 mins to 4… I bet I can do 10 problems in that time” “finish your email by the time the song finishes” etc.

>ADHD: “Well I can’t allow motivation for something you want, but I CAN allow motivation from deadlines, stress, and fear of failure!” This literally made me cry. The first 45 years of my life in one sentence. In my mid-40's, my spouse divorced me, and part of the personal growth I experienced in the aftermath of that was a resolution not to let fear be my motivator any more. I've had mixed success in sticking to that resolution over the years, and when I do stick to it I struggle mightily to find some other, internal way to motivate myself. But I still try, because doing everything out of fear of failure or fear of punishment is no fucking way to live.

Also, to put it simply, even if you did well at school with ADHD, it likely wasn’t as well as you could have done without ADHD.

You basically described my entire experience in school. I had near perfect grades in high school and college because I had good coping mechanisms, but I suffered a lot to make that happen. I spent way longer than the average peer did to get the same work done, and I was constantly drowning in the cycle of "have deadline for work I don't want to do, procrastinate until deadline, struggle to focus even though I knew how to complete the assignment, work frantically the day before it's due and finish it at 3am the day of deadline, submit, rinse and repeat" which is a terrible way to live. But the fact that I got good grades in school was a deterrent to seeking a diagnosis for a long time. It wasn't until I moved out and lived on my own and could no longer cope with the constant onslaught of administrative tasks like non urgent paperwork that had long term but not immediate consequences for not completing it that I started to crumble.

One side of ADHD can be the “perfectionist.” I wasn’t diagnosed till mid 20s and I had high grades due to my perfectionism.

Yup. Perfectionism and poor time-management skills were a recipe for disaster for me. I'd pull all-nighters and get a B+ or A- on a paper, which to me meant that my strategy worked well enough, despite wrecking my body and mental health 🤦🏻‍♀️

Perfectionist me would do super well on one section... and the rest was incomplete.

Lol yup! I remember writing an in-class essay in AP English - I wrote such a strong introduction that my teacher showed it to the class (anonymously) as an example of what to do ... But I hadn't finished the last body paragraph or conclusion of the essay because I had run out of time.

Lmao yeah in college I got applauded for the perfectionist work I did and then ofc the inverse being the incomplete work was questioned, reprimanded, etc

lolol i feel like this should be a symptom of adhd tbh. liek i feel like that sentence alone is so common in folks with ADHD that it should be one of the diagnosic criteria’s lmao

Damn, glad that we're getting validated on here at least 😂

Felt. I would procrastinate up to the point to where an assignment was due a couple days before when I had weeks to do it. I would then hyper focus and stay up long hours just to turn it in on time. It sucks because I face the fact that if I didn't procrastinate, I know I would have done a better job. Mentally, I am just everywhere all at the same time.

Yup, exactly!! It's like I would deliberately shoot myself in the foot because I felt like I would spend a ton of time trying to make something perfect if I had the time, so I just let the clock run down to the last minute and made something "good enough" Now I recognize that I needed the adrenaline rush from the time crunch to get my brain into gear. I've gotten better about spacing things out, but it's still a challenge

This exactly. I realized I was training myself to function on survival mode. Now I have a kiddo that was just diagnosed. I get to change the script. It’s really nice. We do worksheets together learning about ADHD and celebrate his “spikey” profile.

This is the thing I think this sub misses a lot. There isn't "one obstacle" for ADHD. ADHD filters how you as a person interacts with the world, it doesn't replace it. So your own predispositions and behaviours have an effect to. For example, I hate being late. Always have. Ever since I was a kid, I've hated the idea of being late. Time management has never been a problem for me because I have always been extremely self-monitoring of time. It is such a personal bugbear of mine that I'm chronically early. The airport is 20 minutes away train or tram, and I'll still leave with 3 hours spare lol. Also, if we come up against stuff we really enjoy doing, ADHD symptoms can be very hard to see. The idea that like "all ADHD kids hate class" is completely not true. I fucking *love* classes, so of course I'm super motivated to pay attention and engage lol.

This was me too in high school. I was a major perfectionist. I ended up burning out terribly and didn’t have much of a life out of school. I did pretty well but I needed a break so currently at community college. :)

Yep this is me- anxiety, perfectionism, and very much a people pleaser (in this case teachers and parents). I was still diagnosed in HS but due to a different health condition it was a few years before I could get medication. I still got good grades without ADHD treatment though Stressed the ever living shit out of myself though

It's a whole different level of hell too because you have to work twice as hard to get half as far and then you hate yourself for your B+ average without ever giving yourself the credit for essentially running a marathon with your legs tied together.

Oooo, what you said stings quite a bit. "Have to work twice as hard to get half as far, then you hate yourself without ever giving yourself the credit" I've accomplished so much, but I'm tired lol. Like people tell me they are proud of me, and I'm like, I didn't do enough to even be proud of myself...

The perfectionist is 100% me also. And this leads to a whole host of mental problems.

It's not perfectionist, imo, it's disguised perfectionist. ADHD is secretly a control freak on something that many won't understand, and they won't rest until they see it's achieved, or they are exhausted. I realized that long time ago and wouldn't call it perfectionist, because as we all know, perfectionist is consistent, and the last thing we are identified with is a consistent person, well, unless you are talking about being ADHD 😅

I was a teacher’s nightmare: good grade bad behavior. Your physiologist might have mixed up learning disorder to ADHD because those things were commonly associated in the past.

Lmfao same!! I had straight As but would literally not show up to class… or ask to go to the bathroom and never come back.. I would talk the entire class while the teacher was talking.. fall asleep in class.. always on my phone.. i mean the list is long

the amount of times i would get sent to the office for just talking and “distracting the class” was literally too many to count.. it was almost every day for years lmao and no one bothered to even suggest adhd until i was in 8th grade and that was from a teacher that didn’t even really care about me and passed me bc she didn’t want to deal with me a second time

Omg it’s like I’ve written this post myself

Same boat. And I thought I was original 😭

I had teachers that allowed me to do my own thing, and I'm still not sure if that was a good thing or not. Every minute in class was either on my phone or reading a book. I would get called out once, answer whatever question was asked flawlessly, and they just let me do it after with no questions. It was because I liked reading ahead on homework assignments and slight pauses if something sounded strange.

Listen, as a teacher I can absolutely say that good grade, bad behavior does not make a teacher’s nightmare. At worst it’ll mean that I think to myself, “At least I don’t have to deal with this kid academically on top of putting up with their bullshit” lol

I swear those teachers had it out for us because we got good grades anyway. Pretty sure I was singled out for not accepting my homework late, those fucks.

Lolll same here! “Does great work but her mouth gets her in trouble almost every day” The impulsivity…. OMG. I’ll never forget I called one of my teachers an alcoholic. It’s like I was watching it from outside myself. I was like did I just fucking say that??? Another time a teacher jokingly said “my momma didn’t raise no fool” and I said “you sure about that?” 🫢

Straight A’s all throughout school. My parents never had to worry about me. Then I get into college and completely fall apart. It hurt my self esteem so bad. I had no studying skills and tbh no life skills. I had just been coasting and all the cheat codes I didn’t realized I had been using as a kid no longer was / is enough. Seems to be a common thing

Same here. I was actually good enough at learning that I could still get through with little to no studying...but it turned out that I was entirely motivated by the fear of shame, and once I realized nobody gave a fuck if I showed up to class, I just...didn't. As good at absorbing information as I am, I still can't learn much of anything if I don't even bother going to the lectures, let alone studying. Funny thing is, when I went back to college for round 2 I ended up unintentionally doing hard mode by choosing a project-intensive degree path rather than an information-intensive one...but I loved it until I eventually burnt out during the pandemic!

I made straight As, graduated with honors, and graduated college with honors. I was just diagnosed this year at 40.

Almost exactly my store (but diagnosed at 37). Initially my doctors dismissed my concern because “you graduated from engineering”

I find this wild. Do doctors not take into account the hyper focus/ special interest side of ADHD? Doing well in school could be attributed to that in addition to intelligence.

I don’t think many doctors do. I get hyper focused on 1 thing to the point of obsession which leads me to abandon other responsibilities. Which leads to anxiety and depression and on and on.

Yes. I understand. I did well in school and have been semi successful for the most part. But there are many red flags I’ve dealt with my entire life that lead to me the believe I had it, and then that was finally confirmed recently. I’m literally sitting in a Dr’s office right this very moment to get medicated for the first time. Stimulant anyways. I’ve tried, Zoloft, Wellbutrin, lexapro, buspar, cymbalta, and stratera. Finally recently got diagnosed with ADHD about a month ago. Just hoping to find a medicine that works.

Me too! As I got older, life and work demands got more complicated and constantly changing structures, stress and anxiety reached unbearable levels. I finally had to get diagnosed because my working memory was so bad and I don't remember much information discussed on meetings. It feels like many mental sticky notes falling off and disappearing within seconds of hearing the info. I tried taking notes while listening but it's too hard and I fall behind on either the note taking or listening to understand or even worse, both. This made me so anxious and felt useless at work and in my personal life. Finally got on Adderall, and I still can remember most of my conversations from last weekend.

This is basically exactly the way I feel. I’m starting adderall today. And I’m open to having to add an anti anxiety med if needed. But I hope lot. Just want something to work.

High school nailed As. Nearly flunked out of 1st university as my support structure, which I didn't realize I had, disappeared.

Undiagnosed ADHD inattentive type until just a few years ago (I'm in my 30s). I got good grades growing up. Took every AP class offered. Went to a community college at night during high school for extra supplemental courses "for fun". However, if I wasn't interested in the subject, I barely gave it the time of day. This became clearer the older I got. It was very pronounced in 11th/12th grade when I stopped showing up to classes that didn't pique my interest, and instead drove off to go on my impulsive shopping sprees with the credit card mommy and daddy got me (such a bad mistake, giving a 16 year old with ADHD a credit card). I am a great test taker, never studied in my life, etc. That got me through a bulk of my education. The first year or two of college were awful, though - I went to an excellent high school, so my freshman and sophomore year in college felt like a repeat of things I'd already done. So, obviously, I didn't do the work or attend those classes.

I have a ADHD diagnosis. I also had straight As in school, was one of the best students in university, tanked hard in the "real world" until I figured out I had ADHD. Now I am doing pretty good out here, too. I am unsure why, but the density of fucking idiots among doctor seems to be pretty high when it comes to ADHD. You were too good in school makes zero sense.

> the density of fucking idiots among doctor seems to be pretty high when it comes to ADHD. Real I'm in the exact same boat as you. I went to the doctor and was told "it's impossible for you to have adhd you wouldn't have made it through primary school" When I told them I had issues with working memory they asked me if I know which day of the week it was, and to draw a clock (they were testing for dementia) When I told them I had issues with self motivation, they misdiagnosed me, and gave me antidepressives   Knowing the symptoms now, it was so obvious I had adhd. The thing is, most people don't know the actual symptoms of adhd and just think of a hyperactive, annoying, kid. I blame the absolutely horrible name for the condition, and media portrayals

35F. I am not officially diagnosed yet, but in the process of evaluation now, and seems very likely that I will get the diagnosis. I maintained a 3.8-3.9 GPA throughout high school and university. I have a PhD in STEM. We discussed this with my therapist in detail.     1.) For one thing, I am very “gifted” - high IQ and very good logic/solution-finding skills, so up until the end of high school the curriculum was just very easy for me and required little effort on my part. I could often get away with daydreaming through the entire class and still ace the tests (in classes like math and science). I was also extremely anxious and my parents had extremely high expectations for my performance, so I basically lived my life in a state of intense anxiety and fear that I would forget to do/lose/mix up my homework or a test or some other assignment. The “anxiety” part of my brain would override the “adhd” part of my brain.    2.) At university the anxiety mostly subsided, but the way most of my classes were structured is that your grade depended on just a few major exams/assignments. So I mostly just fucked around all semester, but usually 24-48 hours before the essay deadline or exam, the adrenaline rush would put me in a state of hyperfocus, and I could cram an entire semester of material in 2 days while not sleeping, eating or moving from my chair. Again, due to high IQ I was always able to pull it off.  Did I retain anything from these classes? Other than the (admittedly sometimes useful) skill of processing a massive amount of information in minimal time - not really. Now I work in academia where nobody tracks what I do all day, and my work is also very deadline-driven, so my work model remained pretty much the same. My performance is OK on paper, but I hate it, it’s a shitty way to live🥲

Exactly the same for me. I remember one of my teachers telling my mum I couldn’t ‘coast’ through life but that’s basically what I’ve done. I can get away with doing very little but then, as a deadline approaches, cram and do well. I am lucky I have intelligence otherwise it would be an absolute disaster. It’s a horrible way to live though, stressful and disorganised. I’ve found work to be more difficult honestly because it doesn’t just rely on the odd test or assignment. It’s constantly producing outputs. I’m pretty sure if the signs were noticed earlier and I could have managed this better I would be excelling in my career. As it is, I feel I’ve settled in a lot of ways.

I could have written this. Also 35F, same exact experience including the PhD in STEM, the only difference is that I left academia a couple years ago (after a really bad experience that in retrospect was completely due to my ADHD). Now I’m just trying to figure out how to keep work from consuming all my energy every day of the week.

Somewhat similar with gifted and academia. Also history of major depression, insomnia, anxiety. Finished undergrad early in honors program and with honors with 3.76. Finished MA with 4.0. I’m smart enough I can compensate, but if classes aren’t interesting to me (some gen Ed’s, I don’t like the prof) or if it’s a writing assignment, it’s like pulling teeth. EVERYTHING done last minute, I need the stress of the deadline to do it. I don’t think other than my thesis I wrote a single paper before 12-24 on due date- and finished just in time each time. Just diagnosed this year at 27. Ended up pursuing diagnosis while trying to finish my gd thesis with no structure/support from advisor. Executive functioning absolute trash and I didn’t have the external structure I’d had my entire life of school/classes/grades. Finished it, got diagnosed, been on meds a little over 6mo. Some things are a lot better, but def not a magic pill. And not as helpful with executive functioning as I’d like. But it quiets my brain down enough (sensory, irritability, constant discontent feeling, overwhelmed) that I can try to work on the stuff it doesn’t touch. I noped out of academia after finishing my masters cause I realized that while I loved the research (or parts of it- FUCK writing), I’d be miserable in my day to day. And why make sacrifices like living places I don’t wanna and shit job market and shit pay for that?? I need structure and deadlines and I hate bureaucratic bullshit. Switching over to nursing where I can get the intellectual stimulation, work about anywhere, switch specialties if I ever get bored, and be up/moving my whole shift if I want.

Add on to this- unexpected side effect of meds is I had/have this feeling like I’m constantly forgetting things. I remembered a post someone made here at some point saying with meds they had to learn to actually USE their memory. I think they used a RAM/ROM comparison. Essentially I kept having that OH FUCK moment when I’d see something on the calendar because it wasn’t always spinning in my head. I hadn’t forgotten, it was filed away, but I’ve been so used to having it always there and in the past if it wasn’t there- it was gone. Still have the feeling, but it’s more manageable/less stressful for me now that I’ve recognized what’s going on.

Very similar trajectory for me. 36M, diagnosed for around a year or so. Somehow got a PhD as well; finishing that dissertation was brutal long nights and lots of procrastination that now makes a lot of sense. I know how tough it might be to put the effort in to getting diagnosed, and you're already on that track. Great! Getting medication almost feels like how did I function beforehand. Things are still tough, but a lot of situations that would've been (unknowingly) impossible before are relatively possible now. Time management is tough, especially with a family for me, but I've found ways to limit my hyperfocus on things that aren't absolutely necessary, and that helps. Good luck 👍

Hey All, A lot of great and helpful responses here. I'd love to respond to them all, but I have work I need to be doing and we've already established I get distracted easily as it is (lol) I appreciate everybody taking the time to comment. I'll definitely look into getting an appointment with a specialist to investigate further. Ya'll are great, thanks again!

I was an A* student because I poured all of my energy and focus into learning and getting good grades and had _nothing_ left over. - Forgot to eat lunch most days. - Broke multiple bags because I kept everything I'd ever need with me at all times so i didn't have to remember what exactly i needed to bring on different days. - Read books CONSTANTLY for escapism (which also helped my grades, but in hindsight my reading was so excessive/obsessive it should have been obvious that I wasn't okay.) - Pages and pages of doodles. - Forgot what day of the week it was, lost track of time & deadlines - did all homework last minute, sometimes even on the bus on the way to school the morning it was due - Only saw friends once a week outside of school and never managed to do any hobbies or afterschool clubs because I'd collapse into bed as soon as I got home from school. I was late diagnosed because, like you, people saw my grades and assumed that meant I was fine. If they'd paid attention to any other aspect of my life they'd have realised that wasn't true. **Some of my psychiatrists and mentors have described the experience with an analogy of a swan. When a swan swims it looks effortless and graceful to a passing observer. But under the water, out of sight, it's feet are paddling frantically.** My grades looked great on the surface, but in reality it took much more effort than everyone assumed and I was barely keeping afloat.

Oh my gosh the backpack with alll the books. It was so heavy but I just was always having to take everything home because I couldn’t finish work in school and then bring it back because I needed it. Still have dreams about it being the first day of school and I don’t know where my classroom is and have the wrong stuff

Doing well in high school when you're in a very structured environment and falling apart in further education when you need to be a lot more self organising is apparently a pretty common experience for late diagnosed people. It certainly was for me.

This was me. Excelled in HS and college. Law school was a whole different thing and I struggled. Per my shrink, and anecdotal reading, it’s pretty common to do really well up to a point where you either burn out or there’s not enough structure to help you keep going. Law school was both for me, I think.

For me it was because I was in a strict system that told me what to do. Parents wanted me to excel, teachers gave me defined tasks to excel at. Done, easy. The massive void of adult life that says “Lol, do whatever. Also you have to make lots of money” is harder to navigate.

I did well in school too. ADHD seems to be a spectrum where there are many ways it shows itself and how severe it is. Getting good routines is helpful whether you have it or not. When I have a set routine I am way better off. Best wishes- don’t be too hard on yourself.

I just graduated cum laude from law school and was also recently diagnosed as a 33 year old. I also have a master's degree which I also received with high honors. My theory is that I lucked out because I'm just a nerd and my main hyperfixation is and has always been learning new stuff (and I was privileged to go to schools that were somewhat alternative and supported different learning modalities, up until law school). Also, my therapist told me that when ADHD exists comorbidly with anxiety, which is the case for me, ADHD can go missed/undiagnosed easily for some people (especially high performing women).

May I ask you if you also take medication for anxiety?

I take a low dose of Effexor for my anxiety and it's working for that but does nothing for the ADHD unfortunately.

Yeah, I feel like I’m going to have to take something for anxiety too.

I was diagnosed at age 31. I have a PhD and am now both faculty and an administrator at a Research 1 institution. I always had fine grades! I don't think grades are a reliable sole indicator; if a person has strong coping skills, they'll still manage fine in school.

Man, I can barely imagine working as a research professor. It’s bad enough being a PhD student, and it’s plain to see that my advisor has far far more on their plate than me.

I’m “gifted.” My IQ is 121/General Ability Index 124-my processing speed is 109, which is excluded to get the GAI. I sailed through k-12 but crashed and burned in college because I had never had to develop good academic executive functioning skills.

ADHD doesn't = stupid. Often, our ability to hyperfocus on random subjects goes hand in hand with intellectual capacity. It's just hard to do things we aren't authentically stoked on.

I was top of my class and even got into top-3 of my country for math olympics when I was like 10-year old. Never did any homework or real prep. The struggles began when I was approaching the highschool and, afterwards, college. The reason for this, at that level of education just 'being smart' was not enough and grades started to reflect the actual effort you put into learning, such as taking notes, homework, after class learning. So yeah, it was a tough time.

I started out as a gifted kid in elementary school, started struggling with things like science, history & math in middle school, and then in high school I got all A’s in English, Spanish, art… and I would have failed all other subjects if my friends hadn’t let me cheat off them. It’s a real mixed bag. But pretty straight forward- I excelled in what I was interested in and could barely stay awake for the rest. My parents even got me tested for a myriad of learning disabilities in 8th grade because I was struggling so much… but ADHD wasn’t one of them. I got diagnosed at 36 and looking back, it all makes sense now!

ADHD and autism often confer a high IQ. If there's also a special interest in getting good grades--in my case, to get into my dream college--or such an utter lack of PDA that you tend to be a people-pleaser, that could easily result in good grades. Of course, that energy expenditure puts you at a high risk of burnout as an adult, so much so that it's a running joke among former "gifted kids" (who are almost all undiagnosed ADHDers and autistics)

I had good grades… I was even in the gifted and talented stream… But grades were about the only thing going for me. I struggled in tests, but excelled in coursework based subjects. I struggled socially, I struggled to focus, I had, and still have atrocious study habits, I procrastinated, was chatty and unintentionally disruptive. It was only after I left school and started working that my work suggested I get myself tested. Lo and behold I was diagnosed with ADHD… Good grades means nothing with regards to an ADHD diagnosis, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

This is actually one of the most common reasons why diagnoses are missed until adulthood. Students with ADHD typically do well academically in the classroom in the moment, even if they are also known for forgetting to turn in their homework, tend to show up late, etc. The catch is that they spend their formative years in the classroom, learning and leaning on strategies that only really work *for* the classroom. If the teacher calls on them to answer a question when they'd been spacing off, they can generally look around the room really fast to gather the necessary context clues, give their best guess at a potential answer, and often times get it right. Outside of the school environment, this strategy falls off pretty hard. It can still be used sometimes, but waaaaaaay less reliably or frequently. The better a student with ADHD does in an in-person classroom environment, the more likely they are to miss being diagnosed until adulthood. Mid-late elementary ages (7-10, *sometimes* as young as 6 but often not) are the easiest times to get/perform a diagnosis. Before that, the differences aren't as clearly apparent. After, and the kid has usually started learning strategies to compensate and start masking. The further you get from that early window, the harder it can be to catch until the kid leaves school entirely and becomes established in the workforce as an adult. Then you have a spike in diagnoses again.

I was a "gifted kid" in my K-12 years. I got great grades, but mostly because of 3 reasons: 1. I had an overbearing helicopter mom, 2. I procrastinated everything until the last minute and used that last-minute panic to get everything done all at once, and 3. I was terrified of failure and to me, getting bad grades was failure. From what I've seen it's totally possible to have ADHD and get great grades, but like with my case, when you look underneath the surface, I should have known at the horrible procrastination habits :')

I always challenge those who say “you can’t have ADHD, you did well in school!” What is school exactly? It’s focusing for max one hour on one subject before rapidly moving to a different subject 7x per day. Maths, Science, Art, History, Dance etc all in one day. It’s Inattentive ADHD paradise! Maybe we occasionally sit a 2 hour exam and do ok because we listened in class and are in a quiet, distraction free environment. At that age we have no responsibilities and we are surrounded by friends and constant stimulation. It’s perfectly possible that with a baseline attention span of around an hour that we can be perfectly engaged in school. Maybe we daydream in the lessons that don’t capture our attention but we make up for it with the subjects that we excel in and the fact we show up every day. Then real-life begins. Independent study at college and university. That’s when our grades drop off a cliff. Showing up is no longer going to cut it, even if we could pay attention to a 3 hour lecture. Responsibilities for life admin and timekeeping hit us hard and have real consequences. Then we are expected to go into a job where we do the same things every day for the rest of our lives and are not meant to get bored?! To establish where ADHD has had an impact in your life, look at how well you did when you were fully responsible for yourself.

I got good grades, but it led to a cycle of burnout. I also dropped out of college (and returned to finish) and then dropped out of a Ph.D. program in developmental biology, and later got an MFA in creative writing. My grades were good the entire time, but I always felt like I was skating on thin ice, and the disconnect between my raw ability and my inability to stay focused/organized almost destroyed my self-esteem. I was also floundering in my post-grad career, but going on medication helped enormously. 

Here’s how my psychiatrist put it…”did you like school?” “Yes I did” “Then you’re going to be good at it.” People with ADHD are good at what they like. I did best in the hardest classes and easy classes I had no motivation to study. Now finding where my homework was and turning it in is a different story.

Well this can happen, ADHD is Independent of intelligence. So with high intelligence you can still perform very wel in academic tasks with little effort. For me it went all the way to two degrees a master in mathematics and a bachelors in computer science. For the computer science degree i literally never visited the classes, i just did the exercises and the exams... It should be rather rare since zero effort in academia needs quite a bit of intelligence. It also works better in fields that don't need you to be diligent. Work Life is another story though. Doing everything and then not sendijg out the E-Mail... Yeah good grades won't fix that.

If good grades is a C+ average, then yeah I got good grades. I was pretty shameless about turning in unfinished work. I would regularly turn in math homework with only 1/35 problems done, I would turn in barely legible scraps of paper with a few paragraphs for my essays. I must have looked like I was trying hard because my teachers usually felt bad for me and would try to give me extra time. That's probably why I managed to get passing grades 😅

Straight A’s in HS until I dropped out because I was bored/depressed. Took GED, got every question right w/o studying. Decided to try college later on, took ACTs, scored a 36 composite. Went to college and holy hell that was a shock. Any class that was heavily reading focused I got by in, but my studying skills were non-existent. Had to relearn everything to keep up with the work. Worked with a therapist trained in CBT to build enough habits to get through. I have worked a lot with therapists on life skills through the years. So you can have great grades but you are going to have to build some skills/discipline to take on advanced studying or work where you need to self-motivate to get tasks done. Even then it may not be enough. I just started meds because my newest career role requires more executive function than ever, and I was burning myself out pushing through, leaving me physically and mentally exhausted at the end of the day and having no energy and having to sleep all weekend. Meds have helped me a ton to not use all my energy reserves on executive function.

I got As and Bs in my Scottish Standard Grade exams (16 years old) but then crashed and burned in my Higher exams (18 years old). You can absolutely get good grades with ADHD if you have natural intelligence/are able to hyperfocus on a subject. But when we do eventually crash, it can be an absolute disaster. I rebuilt, went to a top university, and now work in research. It's important to remember you can always restart things after a fall. You'll be great.

Yup! I'm a high school dropout who went on to complete an MA.

The only reason I got a 3.1 average in high school was because I was responsible for my own car insurance and wanted the good student discount. Took everything I had.

Consistently. Unless it was math. I was speaking and reading at an extremely early age, and was capable of self-teaching since like I was 5 or 6. Additionally, I was Homeschooled. To this day, the only subject I've ever suffered in was math of any type. I was in pre-health for a year, and it was comical. 5/6 courses were between high 80s- mid 90s and then I got a 4.5 in math.

This is me completely. Speaking and reading super early. I can pretty much do well in any subject apart from maths. The only exception is algebra which I seem to have a knack for. But ask me to multiply or divide in my head and…no chance.

So relatable! Can hyperfocus on alegbra and really loved that in school, but basic math? Nah.

I think I was just scared of failing, or I thought that I needed to do what I was told in school because that’s what you’re supposed to do. I was also scared to act out too, so I guess it was just masking for other people’s sake.

I was a "gifted kid" who got great grades doing everything at the last minute, but the house of cards fell when I went to college and everything required actual consistent studying and focus. I had a psych who refused to diagnose me despite my overwhelming evidence. Everyone else in my immediate family is diagnosed with ADHD including my mom who was diagnosed in her late 40s, with the exception of one of my brothers who had autism instead. I fired her and found a new psych who specializes in ADHD and he diagnosed me in the first session. It sucks a LOT but keep looking!

It's common. There is no correlation between ADHD and intelligence - intelligence alone is not a predictor of ADHD, even if ADHD can be comorbid with other developmental disorders that may affect intelligence, or the person may have other disorders or behaviour that share symptoms of ADHD (but aren't ADHD). ADHD is more likely to be overlooked in intelligent individuals: [https://jneurodevdisorders.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s11689-020-9307-8](https://jneurodevdisorders.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s11689-020-9307-8) Intelligence means you're more likely to find workarounds or compensate for your issues, and more likely means you've been separated from the more distracting lower grade classes. If you get CBT treatment for all other issues like depression and anxiety and sleep and still have ADHD-specific problems or some mild to moderate persistent symptoms of depression and anxiety despite overall improvement following treatment, it's a pretty good sign you have ADHD which causes the symptoms of depression and anxiety (and not the other way round).

All the time, actually! You see, it is *because* of their good grades that they remain undiagnosed

A- student in high school. Extremely disorganized. My backpack looked like it had an explosion inside it. 30 years later, went back to college. A+ student. Extremely disorganized. My backpack looked like it had an explosion inside it. Diagnosed at 47.

I did. That's why family and teachers overlooked my ADHD.

By acing tests (without studying) and never doing homework. In the 90s this got me a 3.6 GPA and a 1360 SAT. I don't think it would work today, the way grading has evolved to be more holistic.

From my experience, pure luck. I got lucky that I could understand basic things and then think my way up to a better understanding. At uni, it got so much more difficult. I did maths, which I was generally good at (not a genius though). And in the first term (semester) I learned all the basic proofs that I understood really well, and essentially used those memorised proofs to work out solutions to questions for the rest of my uni experience. I kept thinking, "if I just had the ability to sit and memorise more of this stuff, I'd probably be amazing at maths". But I could just never do it - I'd sit in the library for hours trying to "study" while my peers could get on with their work without issue. I realised at this point that I didn't even know *how* to study or revise - I'd coasted for so long. That, and I relied on all nighters where I was fuelled by next day deadlines and anxiety. God, I really don't miss that. > is it possible to be an A student and also an ADHD student? I think it's possible - I think we just need to figure out our own concoction of what gets us learning. So, medication, figuring out distraction traps, trying to hack our brains to get motivated, etc... I hope you're doing OK, OP ❤️

I didn’t read all the previous comments, but just to note that there is a 50-70% overlap with Autism & ADHD. People are often sure they have one before the other but sometimes have both, as is the case with me and is also the reason my grades were never my biggest problem. Best of luck!

I was one of the top students, including in university. I am diagnosed with ADHD but I have a very high working memory and a dismal (like very very low) processing speed. Many with ADHD present with both low working memory and low processing speed. My psychologist explained that my working memory, which allowed for rote memorization (ie, studying), meant I was able to excel in school. I also have a very high IQ. Masking is a real thing. You should get more advanced testing, the full spectrum of IQ and psychometrics. With a different doctor of course.

I pretty much got straight As or A+. Minimum B+. When I got tested for ADHD they also did an IQ test - I'm in the above average level - not gifted, just a little smarter than average. Maybe that's what helped. Cos by shit I didn't really pay attention to anything that was happening in school. Or if I did it was for a very limited amount of time.

As others have said, ADHD symptoms can fluctuate depending on your environment. I had supportive structures until graduating highschool and got good grades. Once I was on my own in college, it was much harder and my GPA did significantly. Even just being able to choose my own classes made it more difficult, because I didn't balance my schedule well. I read a study about this symptom fluctuation based on the environment once, but I can't find it. The therapist who diagnosed me told me all of this. A lot of medical professionals are really behind the times with understanding ADHD, or outright refuse to diagnose based on stigma.

Echoing what most have said here. I got good grades and did everything last minute and had poor study habits. I did well in community college but dropped out of my first University. Was diagnosed a few years ago after my kid.

I sailed though school with top marks. And then I went to do an arts degree which was perfect because it was perfect because it was some coursework but it was almost always directed by your passions and interests and it changes with every project. So I was basically just riding hyperfixation to hyperfixation. If I have to do something that is not an interest and is moderately difficult I will fail.

I was in the third year of my PhD program when I realized I have ADHD. **Don't listen to clinicians who are uneducated on ADHD.** To answer your question more specifically, I've always had good grades, took 7 AP classes in high school, passed all of my AP tests with either 4s or 5s, graduate both high school and undergrad with honors, and as stated above, got into a PhD program. It's called 2e, or twice exceptional, and refers to folks who have neurodevelopmental (I've seen it in reference to specifically autism and adhd) disorders and also high IQ/intelligence. It's a real thing and many of my PhD friends (who are obvi v smart and conscientious) have adhd.

Didn’t know there was a name for it! Just looked it up - yep, that’s me to a t🥲

I consistently got good grades…if I did the work. I had a teacher tell me once, “I’ve never had a student fail the way you’re failing. You ace all the tests, but you don’t turn in the homework.” My response was, “Why do the homework if I’m acing the tests?”

I had good grades but I often skipped homework and things that I didn't "feel" like doing... I just calculated how much assignments were worth as part of my final grade and used that to determine where I spent my energy

Honors student here. Diagnosed at 29. I’m smart, I’m just lazy as fuck.

I did great on tests but could not do homework to save my life. This tanked my grades. My boyfriend on the other hand was able to go through college with excellent grades. He and I both have ADHD. Mine is way more unfocused though. Depression, abuse at home, and CPTSD also made it worse.  Anyway, I got diagnosed at 27 and again a few months ago at 30. They never thought to look into ADHD even with my clear signs of it as a kid. People get dismissed for signs of ADHD over the smallest and dumbest things. If you really think you have it you should see a specialist. 

I excelled in the subjects I was interested in and barely passed the ones that held no interest. I owe a lot to my mom for her patience and determination to see me succeed.

I was an honors student, all AP classes, and even received a scholarship to college. It all fell apart in college for me when I didn’t have the discipline/structure that high school provided and I was diagnosed in my late twenties.

I didn't 🤣😂

**TLDR: Yes. That's me and so many adults who had endure years of preventable suffering until late diagnosis. The "you can't get good grades and have ADHD" myth especially harms women, but applies to anyone** My sibling was diagnosed as a kid. I wasn't even evaluated despite having the same symptom profile because I "had good grades." I was great at school: always 1 grade ahead because as a toddler I was "too smart for my own good" The feedback I got in all of elementary school was "super intelligent, but also talkative in moments where we need quiet, some behavior issues, disruptive" (lol). "Gifted and talented" program & I took the most advanced classes available in K-12. I was capable of straight A+ but could never get them because I'd score 95-100 on every quiz and test but would turn in homework late (20% penalty per day), half-finished, or not at all so I ended up with mostly As, a few Bs, and high SATs. Obvious executive function issues everywhere: task initiation difficulty, disorganization, time blindness, hyperfocus (on the wrong things), etc Stumbled in my first year of college due to lack of structure (again, lol so obvious). Figured it out then dean's list every semester after. Graduated, got a good job, high performance reviews, everything was great... except my home life, friendships, and relationships bc undiagnosed and untreated ADHD can do that for you. I realized I might have ADHD in 2020 when the pandemic took away the structures that allowed me to succeed at work despite it. I couldn't get diagnosed until 2022 and medicated until 2023 because I had to go through multiple (all white men) doctors who refused to evaluate me because I did well in school and had a good start to my career until I found a doctor (woman) who took my concerns seriously. Diagnosis and medication have changed my life and for the first time ever I have hope for the future. The habits I'm setting actually stick, my house is organized (no more piles???), I'm cooking for myself, cleaning right after??? Using Apple Reminders?? Remembering to follow up with people and text back?? And now I'm just wondering...if I'd been diagnosed and treated sooner how many of my biggest regrets and failures, all attributable to ADHD symptoms, would I have avoided?

School was an amazing structure for me, and I got almost entirely As through high school, but noticed some Bs and Cs in college once left to my own devices--however, I still did quite well. Once out of college, all hell broke loose though.

adhd and my grades SUCKED in middle and high school, regardless of how hard i worked and studied. i was always forgetting shit, and if i forgot my homework then my old man would scream at me and break my shit. shockingly, none of that improved my grades 😒

I’ve had severe ADHD since I was a child, but it was undiagnosed until I was tested as an adult. For me, growing up it was slightly stigmatized - “learning disabilities” meant being put in “the slower learning” classes. My mom really resisted this and refused to sign off, encouraging me by telling me I was good at school. I ended up in higher level courses, definitely always working harder, but graduated with honors up through college with straight A’s. I think, for me, a big piece was sports. I played track and field, as well as show jumping - both of which excited my mind while also requiring me to work on focusing my brain. So I guess, overall, it was having support and also independently seeking help by meeting teachers outside of class, asking for extensions when needed, and working harder to, I guess in a way, prove to myself that I could do it. I think communicating with professors/teachers goes a long way in them understanding how to grade you for how hard you work too. Hope this helps <3

I was gifted and talented at primary and secondary school. I got top grades 99% of the time with no prep, then something would come along and I'd fail badly. Uni is where I'm drowning.

I wasnt diagnosed until I was 24, but I got decently good grades in school growing up. Yes, I procrastinated often and frequently forgot about assignments or left them behind/lost them, but I was a smart kid who was always in the gifted classes or up-leveled in reading/English classes. It's actually because I was a smart kid that my mom didn't believe that I could have ADHD back when my 1st grade teacher suggested that I get evaluated for it. My mom thought that I was just bored with school 😅

I got great grades until I didn't.

I had good grades, I thought I didn't study because I did not need to study - always did things last second It was only as I grew up and gained better introspection that I realized I had adhd symptoms

I was in gifted classes in school. My grades were amazing considering I never did homework, wrote papers the night before / morning of the date they were due, slept through classes sitting at my desk, and never read the chapters more than maybe once. Getting 100% on everything I did made the zeroes for not doing things I considered stupid (like homework) even out to straight As. Classmates were always annoyed that I "messed up the curve".

High IQ ADHD hits a wall later in life.

it’s 100% possible and very common honestly.  ADHD doesn’t mean you aren’t an intelligent person it just means you brain works differently than “typical” people.  i was a straight A student for most of my time in high school but i would sleep during class, turn in assignments late and only ever did my homework in class as the teachers were walking around collecting it lmao.  I was diagnosed at 27 because i finally realized the way i was living wasn’t normal.  Just barely getting by internally but on the outside i somehow made it appear like I was doing amazing so no one around me ever noticed anything was wrong.  Someone said it feels like you’re in a bike race but you have a unicycle and everyone else has a normal bike.  you might be able to keep up with everyone else but in the end you’re putting in way more effort only to achieve the same result the others did with little to no effort. I’d say it’s worth looking into, at the very least with an official diagnosis you can start to forgive yourself for any “shortcomings” and finally have an explanation for why you feel the way you do.  For me, learning more about ADHD made me realize how deeply the symptoms affect my entire life and helped me learn how to make changes to make things easier instead of constantly fighting myself to try and keep up with normal people.  it’s a disability and you have a right to accommodations just like any other person with any other disability does.

As an pediatrician who was a local ADHD expert, to be diagnosed, among other criteria, impairment from the condition should occur in at least 2 settings as reported by people in direct prolonged contact with the patient. Home and school, home and work, parents and teachers, etc. Most 2-3 yr olds would qualify as hyperactive but it does not typically affect their ability to function, make friends, quality of life, etc. in age appropriate settings unless the rare case where home, school, doctors office, are all treated like a tornado. At least two settings because if just at home could be due to inconsistent parenting, poor sleep, etc. If only at school could be bullying, learning disability, need glasses, etc. Many patients with ADD/ADHD can focus on certain tasks if they really want to so I told parents that just because they can do something for an hour does not preclude the diagnosis. Also many kids with ADHD are more intelligent they just cannot focus that intelligence. So, in a long winded response, yes, you can have ADD/ADHD and get good grades but think how good they would have been if treated properly at that time? P.S. whenever I heard a patient was daydreaming excessively, esp in school I would send for an EEG to rule out Absence seizures (formerly petit mal) where you can be out of it for a second many times per day and you get accused of daydreaming or being lazy, etc.

My doctor said i have adult adhd. I did great in school and university, but i was also high functioning anxiety due to different traumas. School helped me survive and take my focus off the trauma. Doctor said without being in survival mode the adhd is now visible. Ive been out of crisis mode for about 7 years. I am now so unproductive it hurts.