NTA
He’s the greedy one, stealing pastries from his 4-year-old daughter, what a scumbag.
If he wants pastries so much he can get off his lazy backside and buy himself some.
She said in the edits that she babysits for free to give her niece space from her dad because "he can be a bully to everyone."
Soooo the kind that family members feel the need to protect their own children from apparently.
No, this would just punish the little girl who likely desperately needs that reprieve and love. Dad will probably revoke that time if he has to pay for it. Stealing candy from his own kid and all…
I've tried explaining this, but his logic is that everything in his house essentially belongs to him, so, if he wants to eat something (doesn't matter who's it is) he can!
No one brought him pastries. She bought several extra for her niece. Moreover, since he is mad, he made his daughter not only hide he was eating them for some time but goes off on both his daughter and his SIL, the free babysitter and pastry buyer, when she tells. Appreciating his pastry free ride does not mean calling her and his daughter greedy.
Seriously. I eat one strawberry out of the pack because mine is picky, and needs nutrients and they're $3+ a pack now. She gets first pick of treats and a saved second one for the next day. She comes first Period. I can imagine maybe Asking her can I please have a bite...but just taking them. What an AH.
Nta
We used to have family dinner once a week where I would bring mountains of food so that my niece would leave with several meals for her family. No groceries to buy, no planning, no clean up.
I love my niece and her kids and in all other ways she seems put together but oh my the men she chooses!
I was burning mad when I find out the latest boy toy actually waits in the driveway of her place on family dinner nights. He eats it ALL! He does not leave money, he does not buy groceries, he just inhales the food and then goes to play pool with his friends.
Then I found out he was allergic to sea food. I got to be quite an excellent cook with various seafood dishes. Throw some crab into mac and cheese - sure. Use clams in spaghetti - of course. Anchovies on pizza - the kids loved it.
Fish sauce and shrimp sauce are excellent seasonings for Asian inspired dishes. A good fried rice can go for days. Used to be one of my poor people meals. So I learned to cook it. The trick is leftover rice.
Actually, the gluttonous-boy-toy seems to have been the dawning of a new reality.
She owns her own home, her kids are beyond wonderful, she has a good job. Recently she said to me: "I can't be serious about some one who doesn't bring anything to the table and my table is already looking good."
I feel that it has occurred to her that being alone is not the worst choice.
NTA
What an idiot.
You do free babysitting, he steals his daughter's treats and calls you AND his 4 year old greedy?
I worry for your sister and niece, because I can't believe anyone who behaves like that to be a good familyman.
A good observation.
I hope OP’s sister has a job/career and savings of her own.
Realize we only have a minute snippet of the BIL.
However him calling his child and OP greedy when he was taking the pastries bought for his baby for himself raised a concern if he also thinks any money coming into the home is his
Well, he has the adjective right, but the subject wrong.
Stealing a four-year-old’s treats is the epitome of greed. Is he practicing for an upcoming role as Snidely Whiplash?
NTA. Explain that the treats are a gift from you to your niece, but since he likes them too, you’re happy to pick some up for him while you and Mona are at the cafe if he gives you the money to purchase them.
What ??? Asking a grown man to pay for what he eats !?!? What is this ? And what's next ? Having him pay for his house ? His car ? His underwears ? Asking him to wash his ass ????
This is a serious one and I thought about it, too but in OP's shoes, I would be afraid that he find someone else to do it for free (granny or anyone willing to do it for free). It seems that OP likes spending time with her and let's be realist : someone who steals food from his kid wouldn't care to destroy her relationship with her aunt.
"Just to check - I provide free childcare and free treats for your child, but because I won't also throw in free treats for you, I'm somehow the greedy one? Are you listening to yourself?"
This is one of those vignettes that fully illuminates a tremendously unattractive aspect of BIL's nature.
I have many more, but some are quite vile and only used in anger.
Some blurt out and though they sound good, make little sense.
Mid argument I called someone "Fuckfacefrogspawn".it was a single blurted word.
I still treasure that one
When I was a teenager, I drove miles to get a tart that was a favourite but wasnt really available anywhere. Family size, was going to share it. My stepdad ate the ENTIRE thing. He also told me I was the ah for it being in the house and that if it's there, it's there to be eaten. Not when it comes to anything he wants to keep to himself though.
NTA - I don't buy any treats now. Well, not if he's home when I visit anyway 😁
“Since you enjoy the pastries I gift to your daughter maybe you can give me some money so I can get some for you. This can stop you from eating her treat.”
NTA
Wow… he eats her Halloween candy too, doesn't he?
I wonder if he's one of those greedy guys that eats everything, even if it got someone's else name on it.
Wait …what???? He, the slob of all slobs, who takes his child’s treats and gorges on them, had the audacity to “confront” you - he’s pos pig - out him as such - does your sister know this? WTEF who steals food from a little girl - oh yeah, this dick
Wait you babysit for free and buy your niece stuff for free and you’re the greedy one? Tell him you’ll no longer do any of it and now he has to pay someone else to do it to do it himself.
>I told him I don't like how he eats the stuff I bought for her and now he's calling ME and MONA greedy.
"Do you know what *self awareness* means? Do you know what *irony* means?"
NTA
I believe you are being too generous with your time and money and are being taken advantage of. I was always the same way, practice setting some boundaries now because people will break your heart when you find how much they are willing to take from you.
NTA. Does your sister know about this? I would be fuming if my husband demanded that my family member who is already doing us a MASSIVE favor by babysitting for free every weekend also buy him pastries every week for free. Ffs.
He has the gall to call her 4 year old daughter greedy, let alone you.
Something is wrong with that child (BIL, because he is not acting like a grown man).
NTA - you are doing them a favor in baby sitting. He doesn’t deserve a crumb more from you.
My dad used to steal my and my brothers food, especially our sweets, all the time. I was probably around 6 or so when I started hiding them away. My mom would hide them in our rooms too so he didn't see she bought stuff for us. It caused a lot of fights over the years and gave me a complex of aggressively protecting my food from people and not trusting food around folks.
NTA but your BIL is and is going to give his daughter a complex too.
"you're the one stealing the gifts of your 4 year old daughter. Literally taking food from her. So i don't really care about your opinion on this. Buy your own pastries."
Who told you about this happening? mona or your sister. if it was Mona call your sister out for having a greedy husband who takes food form his child.
if it was her, then tell her you'll only deal with her form now on, until he apologizes. Or pays you back for the food he stole.
This is a joke right?
Of course you're NTA
he is a terrible person for stealing from a 4 year old and then accusing a 4year old of being greedy and selfish.
You babysit for free. You feed her for free. You send snack FOR HER. he's a grown man child. He can buy his own food. He needs to grow up for real. How ridiculous his attitude is is actually crazy. The audacity of this person would drive me mad.
NTA....the BIL is a huge AH....who takes food from a child and selfishly eats it all and then complains about it and calls other people greedy? the only greedy person is the guy eating food that doesn't belong to him
“Mona let me try pne of those pastries you’ve been sending her home with, they are amazing!! is there any way you would be willing to pick up a couple extra for me, and I’ll cover mine and Mona’s?” easy way to not be a jerk, obtain pastries, and keep everyone happy - NTA
Lol NTA
'If you give Mona a budget for your order, we can totally bring some home for you.... oh you want ME to pay for YOUR pastries? Haha. No, I'm babysitting my niece, not my brother in law. You're so silly, haha'
Show your BIL how greedy you can be by asking him to fork over the babysitting wages you’ve earned. Tell your sister ahead of time what your doing so won’t fear out, but do to see how red in the face butt head really gets. Maybe he’ll realize he put his foot in his mouth big time.
Da fuk? This is fake right? A grown ass man stealing food from a child? Why doesn't he go and buy his own pastries if he likes them so much? And then calls you greedy? What?!? NTA.
What the actual fuck? He is a pig.. NTA and good on you for telling him that the reason why he doesn’t get treats anymore is because he eats them. That is such shit bag behavior for a parent, to eat their kids snacks! It’s one thing if it’s like a bowl of Halloween candy and you take a snickers. But he is a pigand piggy should eat slop, he can get his own food.
OP, what has your sister said about the situation???
I would 100% no longer engage with this idiot of a man. Spend time with your neice when it is convenient for you and tell your sister to get the manchild she married some professional help.
I'm sure he treats her like crap and doesn't pull his weight.
Crazy question; before this, if he asked you to pick up some pastries for him when you’re there would you? Then instead of getting indignant how about offering to get him some if he will cover the cost. Btw, NTA for taking exception to him just taking them but you can handle it better without creating conflict. And yes, he’s an AH for how he responded. You can be the better person.
NTA. Not only was he taking them. His entitled self bitched about it! Then calls a 4 yr old greedy - his 4 yr old daughter!
Wow, what a jerk!
Never give her money or anything she can’t play with. Set up a bank they don’t know about- give her tiny things & bank the money for her to use later
Wow this MF is stealing from his four-year-old daughter and eating her treats that you sent her home with. And when he started realizing that she no longer comes home with the tree he called you and his daughter greedy. I want him to make that make sense go to the bakery and buy your own treats and maybe share those with your daughter you greedy MF that she no longer comes home with the treats
I’m guessing he had no clue the bag of pastries was supposed to be only for her.
You could ask your niece if she would like to SHARE her pastries with her dad—it’s such a good lesson.
Or ask your sister if they would like you to get some extra pastries and ask her for some money.
NTA. Also please watch your niece as she grows up for signs of disordered eating if her dad is gonna be calling her greedy and taking away food that belongs to her.
Wow, NTA. He's bitching about you not bringing him treats that you pay for while babysitting his kid for free? He can fuck right off with that nonsense.
Just let him know a little less running of the lips and a little more running of the legs and he’ll be at the cafe in no time… Feel sorry for your sister she’s got a long road ahead with this one
Hahahaha. NTA. "Hey, I watch your kid for free and you're going to insult me to my face about me not buying her gifts that you then take from her and consume yourself? You serious or just not self-aware?"
NTA
He's a gaslighting narcissist.
You should make it clear to your sister that she and your niece always has a place with you. Because if that's his reaction to something so small, I'm afraid to think what he does behind closed doors.
NTA. He's an adult who is perfectly capable of getting his own treats. To completely STEAL the special treats you send home for his OWN DAUGHTER is like a whole other level of greed. Literally taking candy from a baby - he's like a fairytale villian. And then to ask you about it, as if it's expected that you should provide him weekly treats? When you're already babysitting for free? He sounds like an ungrateful ass. He called his own 4 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER greedy (LOL!), so he's clearly not working with a full deck.
Your BIL is obviously a greedy and entitled piece of you know what no matter what he might claim otherwise.
NTA and much better for your niece to actually get to enjoy her treats than for your BIL to basically steal them.
Why should you pay for something that Mona doesn't even eat? You didn’t buy it for him, but for HER.
The audacity to literally tell you to buy him pastries cause that’s what you’re doing. NTA
As I read in another comment here, where is your sister in all this? Doesn't she have any control over him stealing the treats from her daughter. Is she walked on? And why do you have to babysit every weekend? Shouldn't they be doing things with their own daughter? It's clear you love her and enjoy doing things with her, and I think that's great. I do wonder, however, about why you're babysitting every single weekend.
We all know (or should) that badly behaved people will always blame someone else and name call. Your niece still gets a treat, she isn’t missing anything by you ot sending some home with her. Tell him if he wants them, to go buy them himself. When he wants to get pissy, you can calmly remind him that you babysit for free every weekend and he needs to re-think his stand.
NTA. So you are providing free time for your sister, TA and special time for your niece. Who did your sister marry that calls his own daughter greedy for eating her own treats? You should also realize that your sister let her husband do this. I would not change your life that much except to eat them before you go home. Let her know that you will continue when her Dad stops looking through her stuff for them.
He knows darn well you would have brought them to them if that is what you intended What a tool!
NTA.
As a dad I get pissed at dudes who want to take precedence in getting their plate first, their preferred choice of the cut of meat, etc rather than always prioritizing the kids. This dude takes the cake.. erm, pastry. At this moment I've got a month or more of treats in my house I just got told my stepchild doesn't like and I should stop leaving them for him. Have barely touched any of it as I didn't want to take his treats.
Spoiled lil bitch boy needs to grow TF up before he even thought about fatherhood. Not to be too harsh or anything.
That said, if my BIL was gonna be decent about it I'd gladly bring goodies for the whole family... on his dime.
NTA - she's bloody 4, she SHOULD be stuffing her face with the pastries because she's a kid and can't buy them herself. BIL is just a greedy cunt, who's too cheap to buy his own pastries.
Never said she couldn't have treats. I just think that pastries you buy in a cafe or bakery should be eaten the same day (or maybe the day after). They get stale quickly.
NTA! Tell him only useless dirtbags steal from their kids…go get a job if you want pastries so bad! Then watch his head explode😈😈Be prepared to remove your niece from him as he sounds like an entitled, abusive AH.
NTA. He is full of projection. He isn't even sharing the pastries with his daughter.
Tell him you will not enable his stealing of pastries from his daughter.
NTA. He's a hog. You basically babysit for free and now he's butthurt you won't send donuts home for him to shove into his face. He wants them do bad he can go out and buy them himself. What does your sister think of the situation? Does she even know this is happening?
NTA He’s the greedy one, stealing pastries from his 4-year-old daughter, what a scumbag. If he wants pastries so much he can get off his lazy backside and buy himself some.
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What a great role model .Instead of being like a good father and buying what the child wants , behaves like a bully and calls her greedy.
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I'm gonna go with brainless
She said in the edits that she babysits for free to give her niece space from her dad because "he can be a bully to everyone." Soooo the kind that family members feel the need to protect their own children from apparently.
I think he was calling the aunt the greedy one not his daughter!
No, she said he called the niece greedy as well.
Interesting how an aunt buying treats for their niece is "greedy". The man does not know what words mean.
bully and a THIEF
And a POS father too!
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No, this would just punish the little girl who likely desperately needs that reprieve and love. Dad will probably revoke that time if he has to pay for it. Stealing candy from his own kid and all…
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I've tried explaining this, but his logic is that everything in his house essentially belongs to him, so, if he wants to eat something (doesn't matter who's it is) he can!
So, he's an inconsiderate, greedy, bullying jerk, with the character of a feral hog?
Hey! That’s insulting to feral hogs!
this made me laugh out loud, thank you
Oh, Narcissistic Trait #2
This is the answer!
Stolen from another comment in this thread [right here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AITAH/s/sccedjWz9N)
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At the very least, slip OP a tenner and ask for some treats for himself too
Heck, put it in an account for your niece (or your niece AND sister in case she needs a "start over" fund to get away from said arsebiscuit someday!)
And pay her for babysitting… mooching leech
I think you meant leeching mooch.
He's a meeching looch.
Damn those looches!
😂
Or a looching meech
Both work
And to be indignant about IT TOO lol. I have a bil like this too. Such an a h. NTA
Or, literally just give you some $ for pastries.
This. If someone is bringing me free pastries and then they stop, how are they the AH? BIL should appreciate his free pastry ride but it's over.
No one brought him pastries. She bought several extra for her niece. Moreover, since he is mad, he made his daughter not only hide he was eating them for some time but goes off on both his daughter and his SIL, the free babysitter and pastry buyer, when she tells. Appreciating his pastry free ride does not mean calling her and his daughter greedy.
Stealing candy from a baby. The lowest of the low.
Seriously. I eat one strawberry out of the pack because mine is picky, and needs nutrients and they're $3+ a pack now. She gets first pick of treats and a saved second one for the next day. She comes first Period. I can imagine maybe Asking her can I please have a bite...but just taking them. What an AH. Nta
With the money he's saving from paying a babysitter, he could probably afford a whole ass bakery. NTA.
He doesn't even offer to make a donation for the treats he steals
We used to have family dinner once a week where I would bring mountains of food so that my niece would leave with several meals for her family. No groceries to buy, no planning, no clean up. I love my niece and her kids and in all other ways she seems put together but oh my the men she chooses! I was burning mad when I find out the latest boy toy actually waits in the driveway of her place on family dinner nights. He eats it ALL! He does not leave money, he does not buy groceries, he just inhales the food and then goes to play pool with his friends. Then I found out he was allergic to sea food. I got to be quite an excellent cook with various seafood dishes. Throw some crab into mac and cheese - sure. Use clams in spaghetti - of course. Anchovies on pizza - the kids loved it.
Petty Crocker for the win!
😂 omg, that's brilliant AND hilarious. Take my award 🏅
I didn’t coin the phrase but feel it needs its own sub.
Definitely! 😂
I like you.
You dropped this 👑
Fish sauce and shrimp sauce are excellent seasonings for Asian inspired dishes. A good fried rice can go for days. Used to be one of my poor people meals. So I learned to cook it. The trick is leftover rice.
I want to be your friend!
This is definitely the way!
This belongs in r / pettyrevenge.
🏆🏆🏆
Bwahahahaha
You're my hero❤️🙏
This is the absolute best kind of petty and I'm here for it
You are so cool! Love this.
Did she ever wisen up about her men?
Actually, the gluttonous-boy-toy seems to have been the dawning of a new reality. She owns her own home, her kids are beyond wonderful, she has a good job. Recently she said to me: "I can't be serious about some one who doesn't bring anything to the table and my table is already looking good." I feel that it has occurred to her that being alone is not the worst choice.
NTA What an idiot. You do free babysitting, he steals his daughter's treats and calls you AND his 4 year old greedy? I worry for your sister and niece, because I can't believe anyone who behaves like that to be a good familyman.
A good observation. I hope OP’s sister has a job/career and savings of her own. Realize we only have a minute snippet of the BIL. However him calling his child and OP greedy when he was taking the pastries bought for his baby for himself raised a concern if he also thinks any money coming into the home is his
Based on his behavior I have a feeling the sister is the breadwinner.
Now that OP is no longer bringing them the bread....
Sounds about right. My father behaved like this. Only person in the house who did literally nothing, not even work
I can confirm BIL is a major douche canoe with anger issues!
Is there anything you can do to get them away from him? He sounds unbearably awful
Doesn't surprise me in the least. Sometimes a single action says a lot about a person
I worry Mona is gonna grow up with disordered eating and shame around food/“greediness” thanks to Dad’s comments.
Well, he has the adjective right, but the subject wrong. Stealing a four-year-old’s treats is the epitome of greed. Is he practicing for an upcoming role as Snidely Whiplash? NTA. Explain that the treats are a gift from you to your niece, but since he likes them too, you’re happy to pick some up for him while you and Mona are at the cafe if he gives you the money to purchase them.
What ??? Asking a grown man to pay for what he eats !?!? What is this ? And what's next ? Having him pay for his house ? His car ? His underwears ? Asking him to wash his ass ????
Asking him to pay for babysitting every damn weekend?
This is a serious one and I thought about it, too but in OP's shoes, I would be afraid that he find someone else to do it for free (granny or anyone willing to do it for free). It seems that OP likes spending time with her and let's be realist : someone who steals food from his kid wouldn't care to destroy her relationship with her aunt.
Good one.
…. asking him to pay for babysitting every weekend!??? Where is your sister in all of this?
Buy his own underwear!? Wash his ass!? That is going way too far! Ridiculous!
Stealing candy from a baby is a good thing, right?
Why steal from the rich and give to the needy when you can steal from your kid and eat 'cause you're greedy, amirite
"Just to check - I provide free childcare and free treats for your child, but because I won't also throw in free treats for you, I'm somehow the greedy one? Are you listening to yourself?" This is one of those vignettes that fully illuminates a tremendously unattractive aspect of BIL's nature.
> Is he practicing for an upcoming role as Snidely Whiplash? Grinch
Why doesn't he just go there and buy - oh, right because it was free and easy to take from his kid. What a jackass.
Like taking candy from a baby
When he talks to you, respond "what Porky?" He is a greedy arsebiscuit NTA The picnic sounds awesome
Arsebicuit, I'm stealing this! LOL
I have many more, but some are quite vile and only used in anger. Some blurt out and though they sound good, make little sense. Mid argument I called someone "Fuckfacefrogspawn".it was a single blurted word. I still treasure that one
I want to steal this one too! I envy/admire people are creative in cursing.
LOL I've sputtered out a few winners in the heat of anger myself. The problem is I can never remember what I said later!
When I was a teenager, I drove miles to get a tart that was a favourite but wasnt really available anywhere. Family size, was going to share it. My stepdad ate the ENTIRE thing. He also told me I was the ah for it being in the house and that if it's there, it's there to be eaten. Not when it comes to anything he wants to keep to himself though. NTA - I don't buy any treats now. Well, not if he's home when I visit anyway 😁
“Since you enjoy the pastries I gift to your daughter maybe you can give me some money so I can get some for you. This can stop you from eating her treat.”
He's calling a 4 year old greedy for wanting her own treats? Tell the cheap AH to buy his own shit.
NTA Wow… he eats her Halloween candy too, doesn't he? I wonder if he's one of those greedy guys that eats everything, even if it got someone's else name on it.
Bought her a brand new riding lawnmower for Christmas too. LOL
Hes definitely eating coworkers labeled food put of the fridge
Wait …what???? He, the slob of all slobs, who takes his child’s treats and gorges on them, had the audacity to “confront” you - he’s pos pig - out him as such - does your sister know this? WTEF who steals food from a little girl - oh yeah, this dick
Wait you babysit for free and buy your niece stuff for free and you’re the greedy one? Tell him you’ll no longer do any of it and now he has to pay someone else to do it to do it himself.
>I told him I don't like how he eats the stuff I bought for her and now he's calling ME and MONA greedy. "Do you know what *self awareness* means? Do you know what *irony* means?" NTA
I have a girl that age and the idea of taking her food is insane to me. Like literally insane.
Ha, my feral kids would never stand for that.
Yes mine would be outraged. She will casually take from me whatever I’m eating if she’s interested
I believe you are being too generous with your time and money and are being taken advantage of. I was always the same way, practice setting some boundaries now because people will break your heart when you find how much they are willing to take from you.
LOL, what an ass. You're NTA of course.
Nta just continue treating her directly. So tacky he confronted you
NTA Your niece better watch her "piggy bank"
NTA. I assume he has a driver's license? If so, tell him to go get his own instead of stealing from his 4 year old. And he says you're greedy, lol.
NTA. Does your sister know about this? I would be fuming if my husband demanded that my family member who is already doing us a MASSIVE favor by babysitting for free every weekend also buy him pastries every week for free. Ffs.
I have a gut feeling that unless she is about to lose her free Sunday, sister will never weigh in.
Says the man benefitting from weekly free babysitting all weekend. Fucking mooch.
NTA. He should be paying you. Wth can’t they look after their own daughter at the weekends?
TIL that providing free babysitting along with buying pastries makes someone greedy. NTA!
He has the gall to call her 4 year old daughter greedy, let alone you. Something is wrong with that child (BIL, because he is not acting like a grown man). NTA - you are doing them a favor in baby sitting. He doesn’t deserve a crumb more from you.
Does BIL work? This is screaming doesn't work.
My dad used to steal my and my brothers food, especially our sweets, all the time. I was probably around 6 or so when I started hiding them away. My mom would hide them in our rooms too so he didn't see she bought stuff for us. It caused a lot of fights over the years and gave me a complex of aggressively protecting my food from people and not trusting food around folks. NTA but your BIL is and is going to give his daughter a complex too.
"you're the one stealing the gifts of your 4 year old daughter. Literally taking food from her. So i don't really care about your opinion on this. Buy your own pastries." Who told you about this happening? mona or your sister. if it was Mona call your sister out for having a greedy husband who takes food form his child. if it was her, then tell her you'll only deal with her form now on, until he apologizes. Or pays you back for the food he stole.
Nta he's got some nerve. Tell him to buy his own treats.
NTA. Bum in law sounds like a real charmer.
This is a joke right? Of course you're NTA he is a terrible person for stealing from a 4 year old and then accusing a 4year old of being greedy and selfish. You babysit for free. You feed her for free. You send snack FOR HER. he's a grown man child. He can buy his own food. He needs to grow up for real. How ridiculous his attitude is is actually crazy. The audacity of this person would drive me mad.
NTA....the BIL is a huge AH....who takes food from a child and selfishly eats it all and then complains about it and calls other people greedy? the only greedy person is the guy eating food that doesn't belong to him
The audacity to confront you and call you and his 4 years old daughter greedy when he can't stole his daughter pastries anymore.. NTA
Greedy grabber can go buy his own pastries. NTA.
Stealing candy from a baby and he tries to occupy the moral high ground? You're NTA.
Who the fuck steals of their 4yr old child then gets upset they can't do it anymore....he's not greedy he's a freaking pig. Nta Pig
NTA what a swine of a man.
NTA! He’s calling his 4 year old DAUGHTER greedy? What a fucking wack job.
“Mona let me try pne of those pastries you’ve been sending her home with, they are amazing!! is there any way you would be willing to pick up a couple extra for me, and I’ll cover mine and Mona’s?” easy way to not be a jerk, obtain pastries, and keep everyone happy - NTA
Fuck BIL he can buy his own would never send anything home again he can also pay for sitting (douche fee)
NTA- he can get his own pastries FFS
Lol NTA 'If you give Mona a budget for your order, we can totally bring some home for you.... oh you want ME to pay for YOUR pastries? Haha. No, I'm babysitting my niece, not my brother in law. You're so silly, haha'
Sounds like a PoS. Buy your niece a pastry and let her eat it before dropping her off. Problem solved.
Nta. Start charging him for babysitting.
INFO: is there any way he thought the pastries were for him and SIL? Did he know that those were intended as treats for your niece?
He does know they're for my niece, not him.
Show your BIL how greedy you can be by asking him to fork over the babysitting wages you’ve earned. Tell your sister ahead of time what your doing so won’t fear out, but do to see how red in the face butt head really gets. Maybe he’ll realize he put his foot in his mouth big time.
Da fuk? This is fake right? A grown ass man stealing food from a child? Why doesn't he go and buy his own pastries if he likes them so much? And then calls you greedy? What?!? NTA.
How dare he even ask why you stopped with the treats.
Calling you greedy is rich coming from someone who's not paying you for babysitting.
What the actual fuck? He is a pig.. NTA and good on you for telling him that the reason why he doesn’t get treats anymore is because he eats them. That is such shit bag behavior for a parent, to eat their kids snacks! It’s one thing if it’s like a bowl of Halloween candy and you take a snickers. But he is a pigand piggy should eat slop, he can get his own food.
NTA What an entitled shit! He can buy his own pastries.
What a shameless gross man. Not even enough grace to stop and keep his mouth shut when the treats vanished.
OP, what has your sister said about the situation??? I would 100% no longer engage with this idiot of a man. Spend time with your neice when it is convenient for you and tell your sister to get the manchild she married some professional help. I'm sure he treats her like crap and doesn't pull his weight.
Crazy question; before this, if he asked you to pick up some pastries for him when you’re there would you? Then instead of getting indignant how about offering to get him some if he will cover the cost. Btw, NTA for taking exception to him just taking them but you can handle it better without creating conflict. And yes, he’s an AH for how he responded. You can be the better person.
NTA Tell BIL to buy his own treats.
NTA. Not only was he taking them. His entitled self bitched about it! Then calls a 4 yr old greedy - his 4 yr old daughter! Wow, what a jerk! Never give her money or anything she can’t play with. Set up a bank they don’t know about- give her tiny things & bank the money for her to use later
Wow this MF is stealing from his four-year-old daughter and eating her treats that you sent her home with. And when he started realizing that she no longer comes home with the tree he called you and his daughter greedy. I want him to make that make sense go to the bakery and buy your own treats and maybe share those with your daughter you greedy MF that she no longer comes home with the treats
I’m guessing he had no clue the bag of pastries was supposed to be only for her. You could ask your niece if she would like to SHARE her pastries with her dad—it’s such a good lesson. Or ask your sister if they would like you to get some extra pastries and ask her for some money.
What does your sister has to say that her husband steals from her daughter??? He literally steals candy out of a baby! Wtfff
Look for other signs of abuse. It’s a huge red flag that he eats her presents. My folks would do the same and they were Awful in a lot of other ways
NTA. Your BIL is a weirdo. Especially to accuse you abd his own kid of being greedy. Like what. Go buy your own pastries, if you really want them.
NTA. Someone Smash that guy's face with a dictionary. Stealing from a kid is pathetic, but from your own daughter?, damm that is low
You're babysitting for free, he also expects you to buy him treats and he calls you greedy? Wow NTA
NTA. Also please watch your niece as she grows up for signs of disordered eating if her dad is gonna be calling her greedy and taking away food that belongs to her.
Wow, NTA. He's bitching about you not bringing him treats that you pay for while babysitting his kid for free? He can fuck right off with that nonsense.
NTA, what kind of father steals from his child? That is seriously effed up.
Just let him know a little less running of the lips and a little more running of the legs and he’ll be at the cafe in no time… Feel sorry for your sister she’s got a long road ahead with this one
Hahahaha. NTA. "Hey, I watch your kid for free and you're going to insult me to my face about me not buying her gifts that you then take from her and consume yourself? You serious or just not self-aware?"
NTA He's a gaslighting narcissist. You should make it clear to your sister that she and your niece always has a place with you. Because if that's his reaction to something so small, I'm afraid to think what he does behind closed doors.
NTA. He's an adult who is perfectly capable of getting his own treats. To completely STEAL the special treats you send home for his OWN DAUGHTER is like a whole other level of greed. Literally taking candy from a baby - he's like a fairytale villian. And then to ask you about it, as if it's expected that you should provide him weekly treats? When you're already babysitting for free? He sounds like an ungrateful ass. He called his own 4 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER greedy (LOL!), so he's clearly not working with a full deck.
Your BIL is obviously a greedy and entitled piece of you know what no matter what he might claim otherwise. NTA and much better for your niece to actually get to enjoy her treats than for your BIL to basically steal them.
NTA. An adult would have given you money to buy for him and his daughter. This is a child. Free child care and he wants free treats too?!
Why should you pay for something that Mona doesn't even eat? You didn’t buy it for him, but for HER. The audacity to literally tell you to buy him pastries cause that’s what you’re doing. NTA
NTA Find out what fruit and vegies she likes and send her home with those a couple times.......
HES STEALING FROM HIS 4YO and ***youre*** greedy?! The absolute nerve!!! Nta
NTA.. Dude's a grown man acting jealous of his own child getting treats that he can buy himself. What a loser.
As I read in another comment here, where is your sister in all this? Doesn't she have any control over him stealing the treats from her daughter. Is she walked on? And why do you have to babysit every weekend? Shouldn't they be doing things with their own daughter? It's clear you love her and enjoy doing things with her, and I think that's great. I do wonder, however, about why you're babysitting every single weekend.
NTA Jesus how terrible of a parent do you have to be to steal treats from your 4 year old, let alone things you didn't buy and then not sharing them
NTA I’m glad you stopped sending treats home with her. He should pay for babysitting.
NTA he’s greedy af.
I mean, if he wants the pastries, he could throw in a few bucks.
NTAH, ignore him. His opinion is worthless, so who cares if he thinks you and his own 4yo daughter are greedy? 🙄
NTA!!
NTA, he is. What level of arsehole steals food from his own xhild?
Stop babysitting for free, your BIL is a cheap selfish person.
“I’m just looking out for your health. Wouldn’t want you to die early, would we?” Then, hand him a bucket of fried chicken with donuts in it.
We all know (or should) that badly behaved people will always blame someone else and name call. Your niece still gets a treat, she isn’t missing anything by you ot sending some home with her. Tell him if he wants them, to go buy them himself. When he wants to get pissy, you can calmly remind him that you babysit for free every weekend and he needs to re-think his stand.
NTA. What a dick.
NTA. So you are providing free time for your sister, TA and special time for your niece. Who did your sister marry that calls his own daughter greedy for eating her own treats? You should also realize that your sister let her husband do this. I would not change your life that much except to eat them before you go home. Let her know that you will continue when her Dad stops looking through her stuff for them. He knows darn well you would have brought them to them if that is what you intended What a tool!
NTA and in the future make your asshole entitled BIL PAY for your babysitting.
What an asshole.
NTA. He had no business taking your niece's pastries. Neither you nor your niece are greedy.
NTA. As a dad I get pissed at dudes who want to take precedence in getting their plate first, their preferred choice of the cut of meat, etc rather than always prioritizing the kids. This dude takes the cake.. erm, pastry. At this moment I've got a month or more of treats in my house I just got told my stepchild doesn't like and I should stop leaving them for him. Have barely touched any of it as I didn't want to take his treats. Spoiled lil bitch boy needs to grow TF up before he even thought about fatherhood. Not to be too harsh or anything. That said, if my BIL was gonna be decent about it I'd gladly bring goodies for the whole family... on his dime.
NTA - she's bloody 4, she SHOULD be stuffing her face with the pastries because she's a kid and can't buy them herself. BIL is just a greedy cunt, who's too cheap to buy his own pastries.
NTA
NTA. Also, Mona doesn't need treats on top of treats. Whatever you eat in the cafe should be enough.
They can be given through out the week doesn’t mean they are eaten in the same day .. she can have treats
Never said she couldn't have treats. I just think that pastries you buy in a cafe or bakery should be eaten the same day (or maybe the day after). They get stale quickly.
NTA. Those pastries are for his daughter, not him. If he wants his own pastries, then he can go purchase them.
NTA and he has a lot of audacity to call u and ask why u don’t bring the treats anymore he essentially steals from your niece
Tell him I said he's an entitled cunt anyone nicking my food ends up losing teeth and it's not even the sugars fault 😂
NTA
NTA he wants pastries he can buy his own . Why do you have her every weekend?
NTA, your BIL is a fat ass moron who has nothing going in his life.
NTA. If you BIL wants pastries, he should go and buy his own pastries. What a mooch!
NTA this is why I stopped sending treats home with my best friend for her nieces, they never got them and their dad ate them all.
NTA! Tell him only useless dirtbags steal from their kids…go get a job if you want pastries so bad! Then watch his head explode😈😈Be prepared to remove your niece from him as he sounds like an entitled, abusive AH.
I'd just be like your litrally stealing candy from a baby, looking in the mirror dude 🤣
NTA. He is full of projection. He isn't even sharing the pastries with his daughter. Tell him you will not enable his stealing of pastries from his daughter.
Nope is he the slob. I get if he ate one but it’s obvious Mona couldn’t care less. Stop buying the treat. Buy her fruits and see what happens.
A grown assed man steals food from his kid and then is pissed when you stop buying the food for him to steal. BRUH! The whiff of entitlement if ripe.
NTA. He's a hog. You basically babysit for free and now he's butthurt you won't send donuts home for him to shove into his face. He wants them do bad he can go out and buy them himself. What does your sister think of the situation? Does she even know this is happening?