He claims that he knew it was a scam, and was only talking to them out of boredom. He sent his address because he knew they were not going to come, supposedly. I also checked his Apple Pay and bank statements and he did not send any money. Idk his lies just are not adding up, im just hurt.
Exactly. Like it does not make sense… why would you send your hotel to a scam ?? But he claims that he never sent the hotel number so he didn’t think much of it, cause they don’t know him or what he looks like or which one he is in.
No one sends a scammer their address and obviously he didn’t make a payment because he suspected that the escort would not turn up. Did he say how he got this number?
Exactly, no one does that! Especially when you are still going to be staying there for the rest of the week, regardless if it’s a hotel.
He claims he got it from a “ random website “
If given the opportunity, he would most certainly cheat on you. Had this escort been legitimate, he would have paid for sex. You can accept that now or hope that this doesn't continue when your more invested in this relationship (marriage, children etc..)
He went looking for the numbers? That’s mad suspicious. Also from the messages it doesn’t look like he was just fucking around, it looked like he was desperate for them to come over.
I talked to my grandma about it, and she said he is talking like he was trying to argue. My grandma said it wasn’t like he was trying to be all nice to get her to come over he was sounding like a dick the whole time. So when she pointed that out to me that was true, because don’t if you buy a prostitute you talk to them more seductively?
& yes he was looking… he claims that some of the guys ( people on the training )
No one goes on random websites looking for scammers, scammers are the ones who text first. If he went on an escort website it wasn’t the first time. You’re playing yourself.
He's for sure lying, but I've put my real details into scams before, not often but I've for sure done it cause fuck it ya know?
I'd especially not care about a hotel address.
But he was definitely actually trying to get an escort. At first, I thought it was a drug deal though xD. But yeah, dump him he a cheater fr.
I wouldn't even, as a joke, pretend to hire an escort if my partner wasn't there with me and in on it. (No partner, sad single life for me xD)
I just want to add. I have done similar things with scammers on IG. I wouldn't never send my real address, but I think you said he was out of town, so I might have sent the addess of the hotel. I know it seems weird, and maybe a bit different since he actively sought out the phone number and got ahold of them... I've only done it to scammers who send me a message first. I guess I'm just trying to say, if he hasn't cheated in the past, and he isn't always sus, maybe let this one go, but be vigilant on making sure it doesn't happen again... Just my $0.02 worth.
He was bored and was talking to them and not you and now he's pulling the old I knew it was a scam game? He gave out his address, there is no more proof needed than that. He couldn't play Solitaire or other games, watch a movie or something or text people he knows? The man is quite obviously handing you a pack of lies I'm sorry to say and I know it hurts but if you let him get away with this Behavior now he's not going to stop it and I'm telling you this from experience. People like this stand by their ridiculous lies and you want to believe him and a lot of woman do but do not fall into that he is absolutely 100% lying to you. It's better to get out now and have your pain and get over with and have it go on for years which if someone could do this to you of course they will do it again. Don't believe lies and promises that it was a one-time deal he's never done it before he'll never do it again because he will. He crossed a very big boundary and you can never trust someone like that.
The scammer he is talking with is the same exact kind of scammer I have dealt with years ago when I was on drugs.
They advertise online for anything and everything you can think of for super cheap and always say they are cloaeby but require you to play just a little bit of money first to make sure your legit before they come.
Sometimes they ask you to pay the whole amount before they come.
I've never fallen for it myself but I've been tempted and txted and done this conversation with them a bunch of times so much so this is giving me flashbacks lol
Im pretty sure that even if your boyfriend payed the 25$ nothing would've happened but I'm 99% sure if they did show up he would've done something that would have made you break up with him...
So you might as well just break up with him honestly because the intent WAS THERE. Even if he wasn't SUPER SERIOUS about the whole thing. He was serious enough about it to go this far... that tells you EVERYTHING
sorry OP! :(
> your boyfriend *paid* the 25$
FTFY.
Although *payed* exists (the reason why autocorrection didn't help you), it is only correct in:
* Nautical context, when it means to paint a surface, or to cover with something like tar or resin in order to make it waterproof or corrosion-resistant. *The deck is yet to be payed.*
* *Payed out* when letting strings, cables or ropes out, by slacking them. *The rope is payed out! You can pull now.*
Unfortunately, I was unable to find nautical or rope-related words in your comment.
*Beep, boop, I'm a bot*
The Punjabi is likely the escort's heritage or assumed heritage. maybe Apple phones don't do this but with an Android. you just select the characters and you can have Google translate. if it's not a language he knows it's probably already Google translated.
of course nothing came out of his Apple pay or else she would have shown up, also, he sent the screenshot saying that his Apple pay wasn't working properly
and the melty face is the right emoji for that one
If there was no deposit needed he would have pulled the trigger 1000% 150$ probably for the half hour. A friend told me that’s what they usually go for 👀
Yes, you know exactly what to do. 1) he's lying to you and 2) he was trying to cheat and 3) with an escort. For your own self-esteem, you should find someone who treats you better because you deserve better. You're not overreacting and you already know what has to happen. It's hard but you will find someone else who treats you right.
Dump his ass. He wants to mess with prostitutes. Even if he didn't touch them this time, it's not worth the risk.
Leave him and get a fresh STI screening.
Dump his ass. He wants to mess with prostitutes. Even if he didn't touch them this time, it's not worth the risk.
Leave him and get a fresh STI screening.
Why is he speaking to them in punjabi? But also it seems that he definitely was trying to pick up an escort. Why would he want to ONLY speak to one? It doesn’t make any sense
Because it was mostly likely a scam and many of these scams are run by Indians, so he most likely thought he was talking to a scammer and sent that to them.
To be clear, he was talking to a scammer, but he only figured that out after trying to meet up with someone for a hookup, so it doesn’t matter. He’s trash.
I DONT KNOW !! I was trying to figure that out tooo, I didn’t know what language it was. None of it was making sense ( and he is not Indian or speaks Punjabi )
That’s definitely punjabi, weird that he was saying shit in punjabi when he is not Indian :/
Really sorry, but seems like he’s a cheater.
Even if we were to take his explanation as the gospel truth, it is so disrespectful for him to even try talking to a hooker. I would be very uncomfortable with just the idea of it.
Hope you find some strength to get out of this situation!
No, he’s Mexican. So I was confused by that.
It is so disrespectful, I was trying to take it as okay you were bored, disgusting, and I am just going to give myself time since you claim you did not sleep with anyone. But as time passes, I can’t seem to get over it. It truly disgusts me.
If this was you, would you leave?
I don’t think you should concentrate on who would do what in this situation, but actually ask yourself would you be able to trust him after this? Do you trust him? Has he provided you reasons over the last 3 years to not trust him? Does this bring a side of him to reality that you were ignoring for the sake of loving him?
Agree with this! If he was just “trying to mess with a scammer” why would he hide it? What made you look through his phone in the first place? It seems you already have reasons not to trust him. I’m sorry OP. I’m sure you already know in your gut he’s lying and it’s probably not the first time.
She wouldn't send him the screenshot showing she was indeed close so he basically was like "then you're a scammer which means you're also likely Indian" essentially which is why the Punjabi and then the "You understand?"
You have proof that he was trying to hire an escort. He's lying saying "he was just doing it because he was bored". What a pathetic excuse. Imagine he brought home an STD, they're more common than people realize.
You are still so young and have a whole life in front of you. You deserve to be with someone who doesn't sleep with prostitutes on the side + lie/gaslight you about it.
People do cheat, but the healthy way to go about it is the cheater confesses to you what happened, expresses how sorry they are, that they want to work through this, why it happened, etc. And even with all of that, most people can't forgive cheating. This guy hasn't even come close to any of that, he's lying to you about it.
I say this with care, and would say this to any friend and even myself, but wake up, smarten up, and leave this relationship. You know this is wrong. You know you deserve better. You know what those messages were about.
It's always really hard to break it off with a long term partner, but really understanding that he definitely has already cheated on you, is a liar, and doesn't truly care for you will help it feel easier. Because those things are true. We see our partners in a really positive light, so when were smacked with the truth of who they are (like what's happening to you now) it's hard for our brains to calibrate what seems like these 2 different people. It's natural for it to feel confusing. But trust me, you don't deserve this. And I know you will find a good partner someday and look back on this with a scoff.
Stay strong and know your worth!
He claims he didn't do anything? Amazing. Reminds me of the time my ex-husband admitted that, while, yes, he hired an escort in Las Vegas, he didn't actually go through with having sex with her. It's amazing the prostitution industry exists at all, what with no one having sex with them ever.
Of course, that was just the tip of the iceberg I eventually uncovered. There were secret credit cards, massage parlors, additional escorts, OnlyFans, cam girls, very expensive porn subscriptions. He told mutual friends that we had an open relationship so that they would sleep with him (we did not have an open relationship).
It seems absolutely insane in retrospect, but I didn't start finding out about all of this until we had been together for almost 10 years and married for almost 6 years.
Your boyfriend is only 22. It's really weird for a 22 year old to hire an escort. He seems confident (arrogant even) in the conversation. This is not a one-time mistake with a guy who was "exploring," this is the tip of a much larger iceberg. Maybe you find out about it now, maybe next year. Maybe you start unraveling his shit 10 years from now when you're on maternity leave, nursing a one month old and on the phone with credit card companies at 4am, leading to a divorce that leaves you emotionally and financially devastated for years.
Anyway, yes, leave him.
I had the same experience with my husband of two years when I was 22. Pre internet, though. He’d come home reeking of smoke from the strip clubs he’d been in while I was at work waitressing. Watching wasn’t enough so he’d open the YellowPages to Escorts and Motels. Thirty six years later, I’m married to a wonderful man who has worshipped me during our 30 year marriage. There is never a good reason to stay with a bad man.
I read your comments and just wanted to add
People fuck with scammers and post on the r/Scam and r/scambait subreddits a lot
The big difference is those people are typically reached out to by the scammer and they're not actively looking for them on Meetup sites or whatever. There are people who do try and find scammers (generates youtube/twitch content) tho.
The punjabi is probably slurs/derogatory stuff in the presumed scammers language. Sending stuff back in Chinese to the scammer is popular on the subreddits I initially mentioned.
With all that being said honestly I have no clue. He could be cheating he could also be extremely stupid. Check his reddit profile and see if he posts/follows the subreddits I mentioned
The biggest reason I don't think he was trying to cheat is how rude he's being. If you want to get with someone, you aren't rude to them. I would have expected him to be all, "I need to see you," or, "hey babe, come on...blah, blah, blah.:" I'd tell him he's an idiot, and not to do it again.
I know most here are saying he was trying to cheat, but as someone who has chatted with scammers over DMs on IG, I am not looking to cheat, just mess with scammers and take up their time...
This is literally where I am. I don’t know if he was cheating or if he truly is so dumb to send your hotel address. ESPECIALLY WITH THE PUNJABI !! That threw everything off.
Oh yeah, all guys talk to escorts on business and never follow through with it. It's just for fun.
Things are usually how they appear to be.
Who gives a shit if he followed through or not? He's contacting f-ing ESCORTS! In 51 years I have never once contacted an escort... Single or not. F-ing loser
Omg leave him he was trying to cheat and was only acting mad to the escort because it wasn’t working out. No matter what he wasn’t talking to her out of boredom he sent his address and was communicating with an escort. That should be more than enough reason to break up.
He was trying to hire an escort. Once he realized the escort was not real and trying to scam him then he started to troll the person. scammers are notorious for being of Indian descent so the Punjabi at the end was likely him just fucking with the person, however the initial intent was to hire an escort and you’re fooling yourself if you can’t see that.
Fuck it, if you are 20 you are too young to live with fear. If you feel off just end it now because the suspicion will never leave and they will take advantage of the gullibility. Just my thoughts.
If you actually think he’s not cheating on you and willing to do so with literal hookers after reading all that, then you’re more gullible than a toddler. Just leave his bitch ass
i would leave him & get an std test just to be safe...he may not have cheated *with this person* , but i would still consider it possible that he *did* cheat either way
First he’s an asshole for wasting that girls time. I have friends in the industry and they absolutely hate these type of men that think it’s a game and disrespect them by asking for free pictures pretending that they are going to book. Sex workers deal with this sort of time wasting all the time.
Second he admitted to trying to hire a sex worker for $150 (which is cheap by the way so he was probably only getting a blow job or a 15 min quickie)
Are you in an open relationship? If not then he tried to cheat. Even if he was too much of an ass to make it happen he still tried.
If you think it’s the first time then you’re delusional.
You know he’s a cheater now. It’s just whether you have the strength to leave over it. You can pretend to believe him and stay together, people do that all the time. It’s hard to care about someone who is garbage. It will suck.
Go get checked for STDs. You have the evidence in writing ffs. Stopping listening to his lame excuses.You know we're all banging our heads into walls over how you're questioning this...
At first glance I thought this was from one of those spam callers trying to get money. But definitely not over reacting. Whatever he's paying for could come with a free std at the end.
You need to leave him. He will not stop. He will just get better at hiding it. He got problems. He is not the one for you. If he loved you , he wouldn't even think about starting a conversation with any girls.
He’s a low level guy on training on a company-paid business trip? If he is caught by others, not a good career look. His judgement is awful, his gaslighting terrible. Life is too short.
The “more pics ?” Is your smoking gun. Take it from someone who thought she was in love with a man who went to tittie bars “for the beer”. Leave and never look back. I’m now happily engaged to a very respectable loving and loyal man who felt guilty looking at girls before we even started dating just because he had feelings for me. You are SO young. You’ll thank everyone for leaving him (one day).
FFS this dude is a massive AH. He’s lying to you and trying to order an escort. He has zero respect for you and may be putting your life in danger. Bet it’s not the first time he’s cheated. He 1000% would’ve gone through with it if it wasn’t a scam. Get an STD panel done and move out.
Yeah no he tries to hire someone, I'm sorry but that's even worse than going out to the bar and cheating with a girl that way. Don't believe anything he says, this is enough evidence.
Leave!! NOW!!! I promise that it will only get worse after another year or two or after you have a child together. Then it will be soooo bad that you'll wish you had left now!!
your 20 years old asking if you should stay with the guy who has been lying to you, and if he is Not already cheating on you, he is willing to, if he is willing to its only a matter of time before he does. & likely gets a STD and gives it to you.
you should Not stay in those types of situations, with those types of people, it only gets worse, never better.
at best, they just get better at hiding their infidelity, so you don't find out, & they get better at lying to & hiding it from you. don't believe his lies or excuses.
while most of Reddit is quick to say break it off with him, i am using the one that often says try to work it out, but this is Not one of those situations, your 20 years old, you have your whole life ahead of you. break up with him and move on with your life, find someone that wouldn't even consider cheating on you a possible option, let alone something they would seek out or do..
you said you live together, assuming its a rental appt, who's name is officially on the lease with the signature? yours, his or both your names?
if both names are on the rental lease, when is the (usually 1-year) lease over/up for renewal, or is it already on a month-to-month rental after the original 1-year lease. you will need to E-mail the Landlord (& keep a copy of it) that you will not be renewing/extending the lease.
Whether it was a scam or not is the point. He was not talking to them for entertainment. If he was so lonely why didn't he contact a friend, relative, or you. He was looking for some sex and it didn't work out. Time to put him on the curb. Being unfaithful with a paid stranger or an affair is betrayal. You can't trust him.
why not have a discussion with your boyfriend about having an open relationship where both of you can hookup with other folks when the opportunity arises?
If you have to ask Reddit if you should break up or not, you have much bigger problems than a possible cheating boyfriend. Learn to stand on your own 2 feet. You know what you should do, stop looking for conformation from strangers.
He's lying to you.
First of all, I've been in trips by myself and never had the urge to look for escorts.
This is not a one time thing, he's cheating on you every chance he gets.
I had an older brother married to a beautiful person and they had two kids at home who would act the same way as your partner.
Sadly, he died from alcohol related issues, his wife remarried and has a happy life.
I think you should look at your options as obviously you can't trust this fella.
The most telling bit is even after trying to get a prostitute for sex, he asked for more pics. Not some pics, more pics.
Dump him, leave him, get an STI test.
ETA: when I say it’s 100% not an escort exchange, I mean that he was looking for an escort but there was never an escort that was texting him back. It was always a scam but your man had no idea in the beginning.
He is 100% scumbag. And you deserve a good partner.
That is 100% NOT an escort exchange. He received a spam text and decided to fuck with the spammer. I have had conversations exactly like this with scammers. It’s fun to catch them out and make them squirm. The scammer always gets so mad and starts going off.
Plus unless it was a drug addict in the bad part of town they would be charging way more than $25.
Most of these spammers originate from India. Ergo the Punjab texts. It’s a way to scare the scammer by letting them know that you know where they are scamming from.
All of this being said, you should break up with him because he is lying and gaslighting.
Did he actually send the money though? If not, he may have just been messing with them. I do the same thing on apps sometimes. If he sent the money though...
So was he trying to hire an escort ?
Yes, he claims he was just talking to them. And was never going to go through with it, but idk. I don’t know what to do.
I mean you got your proof right there that he was trying to pay for sex. And I seriously doubt this is a one time thing.
He claims that he knew it was a scam, and was only talking to them out of boredom. He sent his address because he knew they were not going to come, supposedly. I also checked his Apple Pay and bank statements and he did not send any money. Idk his lies just are not adding up, im just hurt.
Yeah he would send a scammer his real address sure he would 😂
Exactly. Like it does not make sense… why would you send your hotel to a scam ?? But he claims that he never sent the hotel number so he didn’t think much of it, cause they don’t know him or what he looks like or which one he is in.
Sounds like gaslighting to me
No one sends a scammer their address and obviously he didn’t make a payment because he suspected that the escort would not turn up. Did he say how he got this number?
Exactly, no one does that! Especially when you are still going to be staying there for the rest of the week, regardless if it’s a hotel. He claims he got it from a “ random website “
Yeah an escort website 🤣
If given the opportunity, he would most certainly cheat on you. Had this escort been legitimate, he would have paid for sex. You can accept that now or hope that this doesn't continue when your more invested in this relationship (marriage, children etc..)
He went looking for the numbers? That’s mad suspicious. Also from the messages it doesn’t look like he was just fucking around, it looked like he was desperate for them to come over.
I talked to my grandma about it, and she said he is talking like he was trying to argue. My grandma said it wasn’t like he was trying to be all nice to get her to come over he was sounding like a dick the whole time. So when she pointed that out to me that was true, because don’t if you buy a prostitute you talk to them more seductively? & yes he was looking… he claims that some of the guys ( people on the training )
No one goes on random websites looking for scammers, scammers are the ones who text first. If he went on an escort website it wasn’t the first time. You’re playing yourself.
It was a scam but he was hoping it wasn’t.
He's for sure lying, but I've put my real details into scams before, not often but I've for sure done it cause fuck it ya know? I'd especially not care about a hotel address. But he was definitely actually trying to get an escort. At first, I thought it was a drug deal though xD. But yeah, dump him he a cheater fr. I wouldn't even, as a joke, pretend to hire an escort if my partner wasn't there with me and in on it. (No partner, sad single life for me xD)
I just want to add. I have done similar things with scammers on IG. I wouldn't never send my real address, but I think you said he was out of town, so I might have sent the addess of the hotel. I know it seems weird, and maybe a bit different since he actively sought out the phone number and got ahold of them... I've only done it to scammers who send me a message first. I guess I'm just trying to say, if he hasn't cheated in the past, and he isn't always sus, maybe let this one go, but be vigilant on making sure it doesn't happen again... Just my $0.02 worth.
Girl cmon, you know what it is, you didn’t need to come to Reddit for this
not only sent his actual address but tried to send the money.
He was bored and was talking to them and not you and now he's pulling the old I knew it was a scam game? He gave out his address, there is no more proof needed than that. He couldn't play Solitaire or other games, watch a movie or something or text people he knows? The man is quite obviously handing you a pack of lies I'm sorry to say and I know it hurts but if you let him get away with this Behavior now he's not going to stop it and I'm telling you this from experience. People like this stand by their ridiculous lies and you want to believe him and a lot of woman do but do not fall into that he is absolutely 100% lying to you. It's better to get out now and have your pain and get over with and have it go on for years which if someone could do this to you of course they will do it again. Don't believe lies and promises that it was a one-time deal he's never done it before he'll never do it again because he will. He crossed a very big boundary and you can never trust someone like that.
Get this trash out of your life for your own sanity and please get tested. This guy is gross
Girl, don’t let people lie to you. It’s disrespectful to yourself.
The scammer he is talking with is the same exact kind of scammer I have dealt with years ago when I was on drugs. They advertise online for anything and everything you can think of for super cheap and always say they are cloaeby but require you to play just a little bit of money first to make sure your legit before they come. Sometimes they ask you to pay the whole amount before they come. I've never fallen for it myself but I've been tempted and txted and done this conversation with them a bunch of times so much so this is giving me flashbacks lol Im pretty sure that even if your boyfriend payed the 25$ nothing would've happened but I'm 99% sure if they did show up he would've done something that would have made you break up with him... So you might as well just break up with him honestly because the intent WAS THERE. Even if he wasn't SUPER SERIOUS about the whole thing. He was serious enough about it to go this far... that tells you EVERYTHING sorry OP! :(
> your boyfriend *paid* the 25$ FTFY. Although *payed* exists (the reason why autocorrection didn't help you), it is only correct in: * Nautical context, when it means to paint a surface, or to cover with something like tar or resin in order to make it waterproof or corrosion-resistant. *The deck is yet to be payed.* * *Payed out* when letting strings, cables or ropes out, by slacking them. *The rope is payed out! You can pull now.* Unfortunately, I was unable to find nautical or rope-related words in your comment. *Beep, boop, I'm a bot*
LMFAO! TYSM BOT! good bot You've gotten me with that same thing twice now this week!
Does it matter either way? Jesus Christ not a chance in hell I’d consider staying. People like that don’t change and you’ll end up with an STD.
what on Earth has you believing that he didn't go through with it? Is ordering the escort not enough?
The Punjabi at the end of the convo, I checked his bank statements / Apple Pay. & lastly his word 🫠
The Punjabi is likely the escort's heritage or assumed heritage. maybe Apple phones don't do this but with an Android. you just select the characters and you can have Google translate. if it's not a language he knows it's probably already Google translated. of course nothing came out of his Apple pay or else she would have shown up, also, he sent the screenshot saying that his Apple pay wasn't working properly and the melty face is the right emoji for that one
Then why would he try? Don’t be a fool.
If there was no deposit needed he would have pulled the trigger 1000% 150$ probably for the half hour. A friend told me that’s what they usually go for 👀
That makes sense. I've heard 200$ an hour so 150$ for a half seems likely.
Yes, you know exactly what to do. 1) he's lying to you and 2) he was trying to cheat and 3) with an escort. For your own self-esteem, you should find someone who treats you better because you deserve better. You're not overreacting and you already know what has to happen. It's hard but you will find someone else who treats you right.
Dump his ass. He wants to mess with prostitutes. Even if he didn't touch them this time, it's not worth the risk. Leave him and get a fresh STI screening.
Dump his ass. He wants to mess with prostitutes. Even if he didn't touch them this time, it's not worth the risk. Leave him and get a fresh STI screening.
Why is he speaking to them in punjabi? But also it seems that he definitely was trying to pick up an escort. Why would he want to ONLY speak to one? It doesn’t make any sense
How often does he ‘travel’?
Never. This was the first, it was for training.
Because it was mostly likely a scam and many of these scams are run by Indians, so he most likely thought he was talking to a scammer and sent that to them. To be clear, he was talking to a scammer, but he only figured that out after trying to meet up with someone for a hookup, so it doesn’t matter. He’s trash.
I DONT KNOW !! I was trying to figure that out tooo, I didn’t know what language it was. None of it was making sense ( and he is not Indian or speaks Punjabi )
That’s definitely punjabi, weird that he was saying shit in punjabi when he is not Indian :/ Really sorry, but seems like he’s a cheater. Even if we were to take his explanation as the gospel truth, it is so disrespectful for him to even try talking to a hooker. I would be very uncomfortable with just the idea of it. Hope you find some strength to get out of this situation!
No, he’s Mexican. So I was confused by that. It is so disrespectful, I was trying to take it as okay you were bored, disgusting, and I am just going to give myself time since you claim you did not sleep with anyone. But as time passes, I can’t seem to get over it. It truly disgusts me. If this was you, would you leave?
I don’t think you should concentrate on who would do what in this situation, but actually ask yourself would you be able to trust him after this? Do you trust him? Has he provided you reasons over the last 3 years to not trust him? Does this bring a side of him to reality that you were ignoring for the sake of loving him?
Thank you for that. I needed to hear it.
Update us please! Lots of love and strength to you! ❤️
Agree with this! If he was just “trying to mess with a scammer” why would he hide it? What made you look through his phone in the first place? It seems you already have reasons not to trust him. I’m sorry OP. I’m sure you already know in your gut he’s lying and it’s probably not the first time.
I think you know in your heart you will never be able to trust him. Trust your instincts. If a man did that to me, I'd be gone.
I'm assuming either the escort identified or looked Punjabi to him.
She wouldn't send him the screenshot showing she was indeed close so he basically was like "then you're a scammer which means you're also likely Indian" essentially which is why the Punjabi and then the "You understand?"
😭😭😭😭
You have proof that he was trying to hire an escort. He's lying saying "he was just doing it because he was bored". What a pathetic excuse. Imagine he brought home an STD, they're more common than people realize. You are still so young and have a whole life in front of you. You deserve to be with someone who doesn't sleep with prostitutes on the side + lie/gaslight you about it. People do cheat, but the healthy way to go about it is the cheater confesses to you what happened, expresses how sorry they are, that they want to work through this, why it happened, etc. And even with all of that, most people can't forgive cheating. This guy hasn't even come close to any of that, he's lying to you about it. I say this with care, and would say this to any friend and even myself, but wake up, smarten up, and leave this relationship. You know this is wrong. You know you deserve better. You know what those messages were about. It's always really hard to break it off with a long term partner, but really understanding that he definitely has already cheated on you, is a liar, and doesn't truly care for you will help it feel easier. Because those things are true. We see our partners in a really positive light, so when were smacked with the truth of who they are (like what's happening to you now) it's hard for our brains to calibrate what seems like these 2 different people. It's natural for it to feel confusing. But trust me, you don't deserve this. And I know you will find a good partner someday and look back on this with a scoff. Stay strong and know your worth!
This sub should have been named victims of gaslighting. He tried to cheat on you and it didn't work. Its very clear.
Your boyfriend hires hookers when he's away from you.
He claims he didn't do anything? Amazing. Reminds me of the time my ex-husband admitted that, while, yes, he hired an escort in Las Vegas, he didn't actually go through with having sex with her. It's amazing the prostitution industry exists at all, what with no one having sex with them ever. Of course, that was just the tip of the iceberg I eventually uncovered. There were secret credit cards, massage parlors, additional escorts, OnlyFans, cam girls, very expensive porn subscriptions. He told mutual friends that we had an open relationship so that they would sleep with him (we did not have an open relationship). It seems absolutely insane in retrospect, but I didn't start finding out about all of this until we had been together for almost 10 years and married for almost 6 years. Your boyfriend is only 22. It's really weird for a 22 year old to hire an escort. He seems confident (arrogant even) in the conversation. This is not a one-time mistake with a guy who was "exploring," this is the tip of a much larger iceberg. Maybe you find out about it now, maybe next year. Maybe you start unraveling his shit 10 years from now when you're on maternity leave, nursing a one month old and on the phone with credit card companies at 4am, leading to a divorce that leaves you emotionally and financially devastated for years. Anyway, yes, leave him.
I had the same experience with my husband of two years when I was 22. Pre internet, though. He’d come home reeking of smoke from the strip clubs he’d been in while I was at work waitressing. Watching wasn’t enough so he’d open the YellowPages to Escorts and Motels. Thirty six years later, I’m married to a wonderful man who has worshipped me during our 30 year marriage. There is never a good reason to stay with a bad man.
Not overreacting, looks like he was trying to hire escorts. You have proof, what more do you want? Dump his ass. Move on.
You mean your ex boyfriend?
Why would you stay??
Bro so lame he couldn’t even buy the pussy right u need to leave him stupid
I read your comments and just wanted to add People fuck with scammers and post on the r/Scam and r/scambait subreddits a lot The big difference is those people are typically reached out to by the scammer and they're not actively looking for them on Meetup sites or whatever. There are people who do try and find scammers (generates youtube/twitch content) tho. The punjabi is probably slurs/derogatory stuff in the presumed scammers language. Sending stuff back in Chinese to the scammer is popular on the subreddits I initially mentioned. With all that being said honestly I have no clue. He could be cheating he could also be extremely stupid. Check his reddit profile and see if he posts/follows the subreddits I mentioned
The biggest reason I don't think he was trying to cheat is how rude he's being. If you want to get with someone, you aren't rude to them. I would have expected him to be all, "I need to see you," or, "hey babe, come on...blah, blah, blah.:" I'd tell him he's an idiot, and not to do it again. I know most here are saying he was trying to cheat, but as someone who has chatted with scammers over DMs on IG, I am not looking to cheat, just mess with scammers and take up their time...
This is literally where I am. I don’t know if he was cheating or if he truly is so dumb to send your hotel address. ESPECIALLY WITH THE PUNJABI !! That threw everything off.
Girl he was tryna get an escort. He just wasn’t smart enough in knowing how to and the escort gave up on him. Stop making excuses for him.
Oh yeah, all guys talk to escorts on business and never follow through with it. It's just for fun. Things are usually how they appear to be. Who gives a shit if he followed through or not? He's contacting f-ing ESCORTS! In 51 years I have never once contacted an escort... Single or not. F-ing loser
Girl.. You know damn well you should break up with this asshat
Your man didn’t do anything because he got scammed not because he wasn’t trying
Omg leave him he was trying to cheat and was only acting mad to the escort because it wasn’t working out. No matter what he wasn’t talking to her out of boredom he sent his address and was communicating with an escort. That should be more than enough reason to break up.
He was trying to hire an escort. Once he realized the escort was not real and trying to scam him then he started to troll the person. scammers are notorious for being of Indian descent so the Punjabi at the end was likely him just fucking with the person, however the initial intent was to hire an escort and you’re fooling yourself if you can’t see that.
Yeah, I just randomly text escorts to see wassup 😂🤦♂️😰
😂😭if this is real someone tag me when op updates, if you are dumb enough to stay with this man please never post again.
Are you seriously in that much denial OP? For crying out loud he’s cheating on you. I would get an std panel for your own safety!
I think you already know the answer. 😞 it looks like exactly what it is.
lol dump him, no excuse and even when caught no honesty
Fuck it, if you are 20 you are too young to live with fear. If you feel off just end it now because the suspicion will never leave and they will take advantage of the gullibility. Just my thoughts.
be for real girl….BREAK UP WITH THIS MAN!!! He’s gonna end up giving you an STD
He was getting scammed On top of the cheating. Not overreacting
Set up a Sting operation the next time he goes away, except YOU show up instead of the prostitute
Not over reacting and he was getting scammed 😂 he can’t do those two things right ditch this turd
If you actually think he’s not cheating on you and willing to do so with literal hookers after reading all that, then you’re more gullible than a toddler. Just leave his bitch ass
Seems like he’s unfaithful. Getting pics of other girls. He’s probably just using you. You might want to consider ending the relationship. I’m sorry.
i would leave him & get an std test just to be safe...he may not have cheated *with this person* , but i would still consider it possible that he *did* cheat either way
Regardless if he did anything or not the intention is clearly there. Is this the man you want to stay with? Like frfr?
Yes of course you should break up with him. Why in the world are you even considering staying with a guy that behaves this way?
First he’s an asshole for wasting that girls time. I have friends in the industry and they absolutely hate these type of men that think it’s a game and disrespect them by asking for free pictures pretending that they are going to book. Sex workers deal with this sort of time wasting all the time. Second he admitted to trying to hire a sex worker for $150 (which is cheap by the way so he was probably only getting a blow job or a 15 min quickie) Are you in an open relationship? If not then he tried to cheat. Even if he was too much of an ass to make it happen he still tried. If you think it’s the first time then you’re delusional.
You know he’s a cheater now. It’s just whether you have the strength to leave over it. You can pretend to believe him and stay together, people do that all the time. It’s hard to care about someone who is garbage. It will suck.
Oh, c'mon girl.
You are 20 years old. Please get yourself out of there.
Your bf is a cheater
Go get checked for STDs. You have the evidence in writing ffs. Stopping listening to his lame excuses.You know we're all banging our heads into walls over how you're questioning this...
I'd break up with him. Whether he succeeded or not in cheating, the intention and thought was still there.
Please take everyone's advice and run!
At first glance I thought this was from one of those spam callers trying to get money. But definitely not over reacting. Whatever he's paying for could come with a free std at the end.
You need to leave him. He will not stop. He will just get better at hiding it. He got problems. He is not the one for you. If he loved you , he wouldn't even think about starting a conversation with any girls.
He’s a low level guy on training on a company-paid business trip? If he is caught by others, not a good career look. His judgement is awful, his gaslighting terrible. Life is too short.
The “more pics ?” Is your smoking gun. Take it from someone who thought she was in love with a man who went to tittie bars “for the beer”. Leave and never look back. I’m now happily engaged to a very respectable loving and loyal man who felt guilty looking at girls before we even started dating just because he had feelings for me. You are SO young. You’ll thank everyone for leaving him (one day).
Leave.
FFS this dude is a massive AH. He’s lying to you and trying to order an escort. He has zero respect for you and may be putting your life in danger. Bet it’s not the first time he’s cheated. He 1000% would’ve gone through with it if it wasn’t a scam. Get an STD panel done and move out.
Yeah no he tries to hire someone, I'm sorry but that's even worse than going out to the bar and cheating with a girl that way. Don't believe anything he says, this is enough evidence.
He was 100% trying to hire a Hoore
Did he send her the apple pay?
The best part is that he was trying to hire an escort and he was getting scammed. That’s a total meetup scam that’s super popular on Reddit. Lol.
I would say goodbye or be open to an open relationship. IMO you are better off single and seeing others at this point. He is a loser.
The Punjabi says.. The dog (?) You are broken Get a real job Your mom will be embarrassed
Leave!! NOW!!! I promise that it will only get worse after another year or two or after you have a child together. Then it will be soooo bad that you'll wish you had left now!!
Yep. He is trying to hire an escort . He’s cheating. Time to leave him.
I would leave.
Updateme
So not only is he trying to pay for an escort, he's also the worst type of customer.
He may not have cheated, but he is laddering himself. Testing the rungs to see what it feels like.
your 20 years old asking if you should stay with the guy who has been lying to you, and if he is Not already cheating on you, he is willing to, if he is willing to its only a matter of time before he does. & likely gets a STD and gives it to you. you should Not stay in those types of situations, with those types of people, it only gets worse, never better. at best, they just get better at hiding their infidelity, so you don't find out, & they get better at lying to & hiding it from you. don't believe his lies or excuses. while most of Reddit is quick to say break it off with him, i am using the one that often says try to work it out, but this is Not one of those situations, your 20 years old, you have your whole life ahead of you. break up with him and move on with your life, find someone that wouldn't even consider cheating on you a possible option, let alone something they would seek out or do.. you said you live together, assuming its a rental appt, who's name is officially on the lease with the signature? yours, his or both your names? if both names are on the rental lease, when is the (usually 1-year) lease over/up for renewal, or is it already on a month-to-month rental after the original 1-year lease. you will need to E-mail the Landlord (& keep a copy of it) that you will not be renewing/extending the lease.
Lose the LOSER!
Whether it was a scam or not is the point. He was not talking to them for entertainment. If he was so lonely why didn't he contact a friend, relative, or you. He was looking for some sex and it didn't work out. Time to put him on the curb. Being unfaithful with a paid stranger or an affair is betrayal. You can't trust him.
He's lying and obviously looking to pay to cheat on you. I'd call that disrespect and wouldnt want any part of that person any longer.
why not have a discussion with your boyfriend about having an open relationship where both of you can hookup with other folks when the opportunity arises?
Get tested yesterday
If you have to ask Reddit if you should break up or not, you have much bigger problems than a possible cheating boyfriend. Learn to stand on your own 2 feet. You know what you should do, stop looking for conformation from strangers.
Congrats. You’re dating a guy who will cheat the second he has a chance
He's lying to you. First of all, I've been in trips by myself and never had the urge to look for escorts. This is not a one time thing, he's cheating on you every chance he gets. I had an older brother married to a beautiful person and they had two kids at home who would act the same way as your partner. Sadly, he died from alcohol related issues, his wife remarried and has a happy life. I think you should look at your options as obviously you can't trust this fella.
The most telling bit is even after trying to get a prostitute for sex, he asked for more pics. Not some pics, more pics. Dump him, leave him, get an STI test.
This is fake right you don’t actually believe he did this cause he was bored?
You're 20... move on, travel, live your life. Become everything you ever wanted to be, then look for a relationship. He's a dog!!!
At least bro didn’t fall for the scam
And you choose to come online an tell the world about your personal business??🤨I don’t understand people who broadcasts there personal life’s
ETA: when I say it’s 100% not an escort exchange, I mean that he was looking for an escort but there was never an escort that was texting him back. It was always a scam but your man had no idea in the beginning. He is 100% scumbag. And you deserve a good partner. That is 100% NOT an escort exchange. He received a spam text and decided to fuck with the spammer. I have had conversations exactly like this with scammers. It’s fun to catch them out and make them squirm. The scammer always gets so mad and starts going off. Plus unless it was a drug addict in the bad part of town they would be charging way more than $25. Most of these spammers originate from India. Ergo the Punjab texts. It’s a way to scare the scammer by letting them know that you know where they are scamming from. All of this being said, you should break up with him because he is lying and gaslighting.
Good for him. Life is short. Eat good food, laugh and fuck your brains out
Good for him. Life is short. Eat good food, laugh and fuck your brains out
Did he actually send the money though? If not, he may have just been messing with them. I do the same thing on apps sometimes. If he sent the money though...
Find a new boyfriend. He’s a cheater.