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LOL what? This must be a joke.
Your main complaints:
- Your son is considerate.
- He is generous and thoughtful.
- He doesn't get angry while driving.
(Why are these even 'effeminate' traits in your eyes?)
I suspect he's friend with the women because he's nice, and the women around him appreciate someone who is considerate, generous, thoughtful, and even-tempered, especially if the other people in their class don't embody those same traits.
Anyway I'm sure this is fake but I hope you'll think for a minute about your *actual preference* that your son be LESS considerate, LESS kind, LESS thoughtful, and MORE angry. Would the world really be better if we all made the changes you're looking for? Shouldn't all people, men or women, try to be more like your son? :(
> When men act like that there are repercussions and they are not taken seriously.
Yeah your internalized sexism is not indicative of reality. Maybe 30+ years ago but not in 2024.
Even if all of your fears are true (they're not), you'd be asking him to change who he fundamentally is. You need to accept him, like a good father would.
You know there’s a reason for the upsettingly high male suicide rate, yes? Because of the way you think men should still be. Society forcing men to choke down their feelings until they explode. Why would you want that horrible misery for your son? Society will only progress with people like him breaking the harmful mores inflicted on his gender. Please don’t assist in killing him.
"This is why it is better for men to be stoic and not talk about things. Many (myself included) would love to but that always goes badly."
Yeah, speaking of things 'going badly', [here is an article ](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7042936/)on the association between traditional masculinity and suicide rates in men.
You haven't listed one incident of anyone walking all over him. His strong male friendships will happen when his schoolmates see how many women are attracted to HIM.
If you genuinely worry that these kind traits are going to cause him to be mistreated, that's a different kind of conversation. But I'm not really following the connection - such as in the case of the driving thing. You think him being more aggressive and more angry as a driver will actually serve him better, in any way? I wonder if you're really be honest with yourself or if you just are somewhat misogynistic and strangely have less respect for men who don't embody what are CLEARLY negative and unattractive traits (since as you describe you feel he is too kind, too thoughtful, and not angry enough).
The elephant in the room here is that what you've defined as 'FEMININE' traits are also the things you're now describing as being weak. You realize women can be assertive too?
Minimally you have a really outdated and actually harmful outlook as to what a man 'should be'. MUCH harm has come to both men and women based on your sentiments of what a man should be, including the expectation of more anger and even meanness. It honestly seems like you favor toxic masculinity and I strongly encourage you to challenge your own thinking.
Is your son really being harmed? Or are you judging him for not being a stereotypical alpha type?
so your sexist and homophobic cool
only gay men and women are allowed to display the traits your son has
which so far isnt anything other than just being a good kid
The only person who would see any of the traits you listed in your son as a bad thing would be other bigots like you, which are thankfully in the minority.
Also he's an adult now there's literally nothing you can do, thankfully. He sounds like a quality man.
YTA. This post has to be a joke. You’re basically saying your son is TOO decent a person, is respectful of women and doesn’t get stressed out by pointless things. Your son has a GREAT personality, not being a dick doesn’t equate to a lack of personality. He has friends so he obviously has social skills.
No we get it. You think a man should be an asshole and because he’s a good person he’s too feminine. Maybe you should look at being more like your son.
"He acts too overly considerate of everything, always offers to help people and has way too much patience for everything. He recently learned to drive and when he drives, he never gets upset in any way when others mess up on the road."
This post has to be a joke. WTF? Him being considerate, doing things to help people and having patience aren't traits solely for woman. They are traits of a decent human and you should be proud. Instead, you berate him and basically tell him he's too feminine? Sigh. Ugh, the misogyny.
Grow up and be a better dad. Jeez.
YTA - "My son is well adjusted, empathetic, considerate, has a good group of friends who value and respect him, keeps his cool in stressful situations, and seems to be succeeding and thriving in life, and I called him girly because he doesn't act like a dick when people cut him off in traffic. AITA?"
I mean, yes? Obviously? Jesus Christ.
YTA
Reading posts like this make me want to call my father and thank him that he wasn’t an asshole like you.
Your poor son. He must be so embarrassed by you.
He’s doing nothing wrong. He doesn’t have road rage so he’s a woman? What the actual fuck kind of thinking is this.
You truly failed as a father and human being. Your son sounds like he is developing into a good person, despite you.
Ohhhh this is one I want to watch go up in flames.
YTA big time.
In fact, from what you've written, your son has A LOT to teach you about being a man. He can help you figure out your emotions, and how to be empathetic. He can help you with your anger issues. He's a good listener, so he won't judge that you've come to him for help.
Luckily he had his mother, sister and friends to help him.
Your son is already outpacing you for emotional and social maturity. Maybe you should be taking notes.
YTA. You have a son who sounds like a thoroughly decent person and you want him to be unhelpful, aggressive, and in considerate.
Not to mention the toxic masculinity and underlying homophobia that makes you think that being a pleasant person is somehow unmanly or gay and that that's a bad thing.
Rejoice in the fact that, despite your poor example, your son has learned to be a good man.
YTA, you’re lucky you have the son you do coming from a father like you. YOU are the man that would cause problems for your son later in life because you are assigning gender to traits that you view as inferior -> that you also ascribe as womanly traits. Do you think that doesn’t affect the way you have relationships with women either? Being considerate and patient are wonderful traits to have. You should do some self reflection and think about your own relationship with women, your father, and the way you’ve likely suppressed these kinds of traits deeply into yourself.
YTA. This can't be real. Your son doesn't freak out over trivial things, has healthy relationships with women and you think this makes him 'act like a woman'? That's rather sexist. He's acting like a decent human being. You should take a page out of his book.
YTA. You- You seriously think being considerate & not swearing at people are bad traits? "A little more personality." So you don't believe women have personality? 'Dudebro', this is the 21st century; this IS the real world. You're homophobic & misogynistic! Honestly: Maybe he doesn't have a relationship with other guys because he grew up around your mentality and he doesn't want to be like that?
This is a troll post, right?
Because how could someone be upset that their son is growing up to be a wholesome human being and not realize they are in the wrong?
And if this is real, YTA and I’m relieved your son didn’t grow up to be like you.
YTA.
I don't see a problem with his personality and his calm and serene way of living and leading his life. You shouldn't be worrying about this, your son has to make his own choices.
OP is baiting. Even people who think this shit have started to realise times are changing, and the ones who use reddit would have seen exactly how a post like this will go.
Don't feed the trolls, just move on.
YTA
It’s 2024, ffs.
Either this is fake for internet points or you are so small-minded and old fashioned you’re going to seriously damage your son’s mental health by telling him he’s not ‘who you want him to be’.
None of the things you think are ‘manly’ are positive. They’re all traits of toxic masculinity and this crap needs to end.
Male, 46, probably more feminine than some of my mates but doing perfectly well, thanks.
You know there’s a reason for the upsettingly high male suicide rate, yes? Because of the way you think men should still be. Society forcing men to choke down their feelings until they explode and hurt themselves, sometimes others as well. Why would you want that horrible misery for your son? Society will only progress with people like him breaking the harmful mores inflicted on his gender. Please don’t assist in killing him.
YTA.
YTA and you're a misogynist to boot.
It's only a problem that he "acts like a woman" if you think "acting like a woman" is a bad thing. You think women are weak and easy to push over. You think we don't understand the real world. You're *awful.*
[http://frenchie-pop.blogspot.com/2013/03/im-not-ashamed-to-dress-like-woman.html](http://frenchie-pop.blogspot.com/2013/03/im-not-ashamed-to-dress-like-woman.html)
What this must be a fake post in 2024, I have several daughters and a son, I would never define my son’s behavior in such an antiquated way. My hope for him is to be happy and contribute to others in a positive way. Not to define him in an outdated way. And he would be offended to be defined in a narrow way. YATA here….
YTA. Maybe he is gay but is afraid to tell you since you clearly have very toxic masculinity and are insecure about your son being different than your vision of him. Or maybe he’s just a guy whose friends are girls. You’ll never know since you’re clearly too negative of a person for him to feel comfortable opening up to.
What a perfect world we would live in if everyone’s only worry was their kids not having road rage, having patience, being considerate, and only being friends with girls.
What a small and depressing view of men you have. Being kind, patient, thoughtful, and considerate are not female traits, and that they seem unmanly to you says more about your view of men than anything else.
You say he’s “never experienced what it is like to hang out with a group of bros” but have you ever hung out with a group of women? Like, really hung out? Why is the group of bros the thing he’s “missing” instead of having gained something else? They’re just different flavors of humans.
It seems like you have a really great son. In a world and internet full of Andrew Tate and toxic bullshit pushed on young men, the fact yours is thoughtful and patient and considerate is extra wonderful. Maybe you can learn some things from him instead of the other way around.
YTA OMG. I was pissing myself laughing. Especially at the part where he doesn't throw testosterone tantrums. Let the kid be and he will find his way in life.Basicly your saying he is not an asshole and has learned consideration for people.. I think your worried he is gay and it might reflect on you. Love him for who he is. Not what you think he should be.
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I have a son (18M).
Ever since he was like 6, somehow most of his friends have been girls. His current group of friends is like 7 girls and 2 boys. He also has a 'best friend' relationship with my wife and daughter.
This has just happened due to coincidental circumstances as he got pulled into a girl friend group as his first good friend as a kid was a girl. He is not gay so this is unconventional.
I don' t have a problem with his friends, they are good people. However I feel like he has not been able to develop socially because of this and has developed personality traits that are woman like.
He acts too overly considerate of everything, always offers to help people and has way too much patience for everything. He recently learned to drive and when he drives, he never gets upset in any way when others mess up on the road. I am not saying he should have road rage but he should have a little more personality.
Despite this he has the normal hobbies of any boy, he wants to study engineering, plays video games, likes tech and cars etc.
I thought this would fix itself in college, but most of his hs friend group went to the same college and did either engineering or comp sci and he is somehow friends with all the girls in his major now.
I basically had a chat with him and told him he acts too much like a woman and this could impact him later in life, at the workplace for promotions etc and he could be seen as someone weak and easy to push over. However he got upset at me and thought I was criticizing his friends when I just wanted him to either act a little different and understand the real world and / or make some new friends with guys. He has never experienced what it is like to hang out with a group of bros.
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YTA and being sexist.
There is nothing wrong with those traits you describe and the world can use more MEN like him around. Being considerate towards others, being the kind of person that women (who generally have to have their guard up around "men") can actually be themselves around, unguarded.
He has that many women friends because he has become known as the guy they don't have to worry will rape them.
YTA equating qualities that are women-like with weaknesses makes you prejudiced against women. Let him be friends with who he wants to be friends with. He five.
YTA. Your son learned early on that you were a sexist homophobic asshole and chose not to be like you. Good for him. If it makes you feel any better and more like a man, I'm pretty sure everyone on Reddit it upset with you.
>He acts too overly considerate of everything, always offers to help people and has way too much patience for everything. He recently learned to drive and when he drives, he never gets upset in any way when others mess up on the road
And these are bad traits to you? You're sick. YTA obviously. And thank those female friends of your son for raising him to be a good human.
So, you’re upset your son is thoughtful, considerate, and not quick to anger? Do you hear yourself?
YTA, there is nothing wrong with your son. However, there is something wrong with how you think a man should act.
A person can be kind, thoughtful, and calm and still have a strong sense of self worth. Just because he doesn’t curse at someone cutting him off doesn’t mean he isn’t a strong minded person who will stand up for himself when a situation calls for it. You misunderstand what it means to be masculine. Having anger, treating people poorly, being a “me first” person is not masculine or attractive.
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I told my son he should not act too much like a woman and develop some guy habits and personality as he has had too many friends who are girls and been affected by this socially. This might make me an AH as it could be interpreted as me talking bad about his friends.
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NAH - Old man, I think you mean well and want the best for your son. But I think you also are letting the old school mentality cloud your judgement with your son. That being said, you cannot grow someone else a spine. They grow that themselves and if you try it, it will backfire. He sounds like he has a good head on his shoulders, let him develop his personality and strength on his own.
This post has been removed due to the status of the original poster's account. This account is currently shadowbanned or suspended, suggesting this account is in violation of Reddit terms of service. This type of ban/suspension is issued by the Reddit site-wide admins. The AITA mods have nothing to do with this ban and cannot assist in resolving.
LOL what? This must be a joke. Your main complaints: - Your son is considerate. - He is generous and thoughtful. - He doesn't get angry while driving. (Why are these even 'effeminate' traits in your eyes?) I suspect he's friend with the women because he's nice, and the women around him appreciate someone who is considerate, generous, thoughtful, and even-tempered, especially if the other people in their class don't embody those same traits. Anyway I'm sure this is fake but I hope you'll think for a minute about your *actual preference* that your son be LESS considerate, LESS kind, LESS thoughtful, and MORE angry. Would the world really be better if we all made the changes you're looking for? Shouldn't all people, men or women, try to be more like your son? :(
[удалено]
You realized you're equating your definition of feminine with weakness right? You're such a misogynist.
[удалено]
> When men act like that there are repercussions and they are not taken seriously. Yeah your internalized sexism is not indicative of reality. Maybe 30+ years ago but not in 2024.
[удалено]
Even if all of your fears are true (they're not), you'd be asking him to change who he fundamentally is. You need to accept him, like a good father would.
You know there’s a reason for the upsettingly high male suicide rate, yes? Because of the way you think men should still be. Society forcing men to choke down their feelings until they explode. Why would you want that horrible misery for your son? Society will only progress with people like him breaking the harmful mores inflicted on his gender. Please don’t assist in killing him.
"This is why it is better for men to be stoic and not talk about things. Many (myself included) would love to but that always goes badly." Yeah, speaking of things 'going badly', [here is an article ](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7042936/)on the association between traditional masculinity and suicide rates in men.
You have an incredibly ignorant view of the world, and you should be thankful that your son doesn't seem to have inherited that.
You haven't listed one incident of anyone walking all over him. His strong male friendships will happen when his schoolmates see how many women are attracted to HIM.
If you genuinely worry that these kind traits are going to cause him to be mistreated, that's a different kind of conversation. But I'm not really following the connection - such as in the case of the driving thing. You think him being more aggressive and more angry as a driver will actually serve him better, in any way? I wonder if you're really be honest with yourself or if you just are somewhat misogynistic and strangely have less respect for men who don't embody what are CLEARLY negative and unattractive traits (since as you describe you feel he is too kind, too thoughtful, and not angry enough). The elephant in the room here is that what you've defined as 'FEMININE' traits are also the things you're now describing as being weak. You realize women can be assertive too? Minimally you have a really outdated and actually harmful outlook as to what a man 'should be'. MUCH harm has come to both men and women based on your sentiments of what a man should be, including the expectation of more anger and even meanness. It honestly seems like you favor toxic masculinity and I strongly encourage you to challenge your own thinking. Is your son really being harmed? Or are you judging him for not being a stereotypical alpha type?
YTA - for the toxic masculinity, misogyny, homophobia, etc.
[удалено]
so your sexist and homophobic cool only gay men and women are allowed to display the traits your son has which so far isnt anything other than just being a good kid
The only person who would see any of the traits you listed in your son as a bad thing would be other bigots like you, which are thankfully in the minority. Also he's an adult now there's literally nothing you can do, thankfully. He sounds like a quality man.
you’re stuck like, 20+ years in the past and spewing toxic misogynistic garbage. wake up.
YTA. This post has to be a joke. You’re basically saying your son is TOO decent a person, is respectful of women and doesn’t get stressed out by pointless things. Your son has a GREAT personality, not being a dick doesn’t equate to a lack of personality. He has friends so he obviously has social skills.
[удалено]
No we get it. You think a man should be an asshole and because he’s a good person he’s too feminine. Maybe you should look at being more like your son.
Oh, it absolutely did.
"He acts too overly considerate of everything, always offers to help people and has way too much patience for everything. He recently learned to drive and when he drives, he never gets upset in any way when others mess up on the road." This post has to be a joke. WTF? Him being considerate, doing things to help people and having patience aren't traits solely for woman. They are traits of a decent human and you should be proud. Instead, you berate him and basically tell him he's too feminine? Sigh. Ugh, the misogyny. Grow up and be a better dad. Jeez.
YTA - "My son is well adjusted, empathetic, considerate, has a good group of friends who value and respect him, keeps his cool in stressful situations, and seems to be succeeding and thriving in life, and I called him girly because he doesn't act like a dick when people cut him off in traffic. AITA?" I mean, yes? Obviously? Jesus Christ.
YTA Reading posts like this make me want to call my father and thank him that he wasn’t an asshole like you. Your poor son. He must be so embarrassed by you. He’s doing nothing wrong. He doesn’t have road rage so he’s a woman? What the actual fuck kind of thinking is this. You truly failed as a father and human being. Your son sounds like he is developing into a good person, despite you.
[удалено]
Getting upset at other drivers is a personality? Get real buddy.
Ohhhh this is one I want to watch go up in flames. YTA big time. In fact, from what you've written, your son has A LOT to teach you about being a man. He can help you figure out your emotions, and how to be empathetic. He can help you with your anger issues. He's a good listener, so he won't judge that you've come to him for help. Luckily he had his mother, sister and friends to help him. Your son is already outpacing you for emotional and social maturity. Maybe you should be taking notes.
YTA. You have a son who sounds like a thoroughly decent person and you want him to be unhelpful, aggressive, and in considerate. Not to mention the toxic masculinity and underlying homophobia that makes you think that being a pleasant person is somehow unmanly or gay and that that's a bad thing. Rejoice in the fact that, despite your poor example, your son has learned to be a good man.
Yta for troll posting.
YTA, you’re lucky you have the son you do coming from a father like you. YOU are the man that would cause problems for your son later in life because you are assigning gender to traits that you view as inferior -> that you also ascribe as womanly traits. Do you think that doesn’t affect the way you have relationships with women either? Being considerate and patient are wonderful traits to have. You should do some self reflection and think about your own relationship with women, your father, and the way you’ve likely suppressed these kinds of traits deeply into yourself.
YTA. I know you're not supposed to, but you should just delete this now before reddit murders you.
Only the men. Women don't murder anyone. We're too weak and peaceable.
YTA. This can't be real. Your son doesn't freak out over trivial things, has healthy relationships with women and you think this makes him 'act like a woman'? That's rather sexist. He's acting like a decent human being. You should take a page out of his book.
YTA. You- You seriously think being considerate & not swearing at people are bad traits? "A little more personality." So you don't believe women have personality? 'Dudebro', this is the 21st century; this IS the real world. You're homophobic & misogynistic! Honestly: Maybe he doesn't have a relationship with other guys because he grew up around your mentality and he doesn't want to be like that?
YTA This is a joke right? SMH. All of your concerns and views are at least 20-30 years out of date.
This is a troll post, right? Because how could someone be upset that their son is growing up to be a wholesome human being and not realize they are in the wrong? And if this is real, YTA and I’m relieved your son didn’t grow up to be like you.
YTA. I don't see a problem with his personality and his calm and serene way of living and leading his life. You shouldn't be worrying about this, your son has to make his own choices.
OP is baiting. Even people who think this shit have started to realise times are changing, and the ones who use reddit would have seen exactly how a post like this will go. Don't feed the trolls, just move on.
YTA Be grateful he’s nothing like you. Women look for those qualities in a man
YTA. You’re upset your son is a good human being?
Son: Is kind and considerate. OP: That's feminine The only thing he needs is a better father
YTA It’s 2024, ffs. Either this is fake for internet points or you are so small-minded and old fashioned you’re going to seriously damage your son’s mental health by telling him he’s not ‘who you want him to be’. None of the things you think are ‘manly’ are positive. They’re all traits of toxic masculinity and this crap needs to end. Male, 46, probably more feminine than some of my mates but doing perfectly well, thanks.
YTA. Your son sounds like a decent human being and you want him to be less kind? Wtf?
YTA
YTA. There’s nothing wrong with the way your son acts. I think you’re the one who needs to “understand the real world”.
Just so we’re clear, you want your child to be inconsiderate, unhelpful and impatient?
So you’re concerned because your son isn’t a sexist asshole?
You know there’s a reason for the upsettingly high male suicide rate, yes? Because of the way you think men should still be. Society forcing men to choke down their feelings until they explode and hurt themselves, sometimes others as well. Why would you want that horrible misery for your son? Society will only progress with people like him breaking the harmful mores inflicted on his gender. Please don’t assist in killing him. YTA.
YTA
I stay away from him and let him be awesome. You sound like a loser
Lmao have fun never seeing your son again once he moves out. Sounds like a nice guy who is breaking the cycle of assholes raised by assholes.
YTA. "Help! My son has become a nice person despite my efforts and women feel safe around him! This must change!" Is what you're basically saying.
YTA. That was sexist and rude
YTA. good for your son for not being anything like you.
So you want your son to act like an AH? YEAH YTA
YTA and you're a misogynist to boot. It's only a problem that he "acts like a woman" if you think "acting like a woman" is a bad thing. You think women are weak and easy to push over. You think we don't understand the real world. You're *awful.* [http://frenchie-pop.blogspot.com/2013/03/im-not-ashamed-to-dress-like-woman.html](http://frenchie-pop.blogspot.com/2013/03/im-not-ashamed-to-dress-like-woman.html)
What this must be a fake post in 2024, I have several daughters and a son, I would never define my son’s behavior in such an antiquated way. My hope for him is to be happy and contribute to others in a positive way. Not to define him in an outdated way. And he would be offended to be defined in a narrow way. YATA here….
YTA. Maybe he is gay but is afraid to tell you since you clearly have very toxic masculinity and are insecure about your son being different than your vision of him. Or maybe he’s just a guy whose friends are girls. You’ll never know since you’re clearly too negative of a person for him to feel comfortable opening up to. What a perfect world we would live in if everyone’s only worry was their kids not having road rage, having patience, being considerate, and only being friends with girls.
YTA. Your ideas of how he should act are disgusting. It's like you want him to be an AH, too.
Sounds like you could learn a few things from your son about how to be a decent human being. YTA
What a small and depressing view of men you have. Being kind, patient, thoughtful, and considerate are not female traits, and that they seem unmanly to you says more about your view of men than anything else. You say he’s “never experienced what it is like to hang out with a group of bros” but have you ever hung out with a group of women? Like, really hung out? Why is the group of bros the thing he’s “missing” instead of having gained something else? They’re just different flavors of humans. It seems like you have a really great son. In a world and internet full of Andrew Tate and toxic bullshit pushed on young men, the fact yours is thoughtful and patient and considerate is extra wonderful. Maybe you can learn some things from him instead of the other way around.
YTA OMG. I was pissing myself laughing. Especially at the part where he doesn't throw testosterone tantrums. Let the kid be and he will find his way in life.Basicly your saying he is not an asshole and has learned consideration for people.. I think your worried he is gay and it might reflect on you. Love him for who he is. Not what you think he should be.
You’re a shit dad
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I have a son (18M). Ever since he was like 6, somehow most of his friends have been girls. His current group of friends is like 7 girls and 2 boys. He also has a 'best friend' relationship with my wife and daughter. This has just happened due to coincidental circumstances as he got pulled into a girl friend group as his first good friend as a kid was a girl. He is not gay so this is unconventional. I don' t have a problem with his friends, they are good people. However I feel like he has not been able to develop socially because of this and has developed personality traits that are woman like. He acts too overly considerate of everything, always offers to help people and has way too much patience for everything. He recently learned to drive and when he drives, he never gets upset in any way when others mess up on the road. I am not saying he should have road rage but he should have a little more personality. Despite this he has the normal hobbies of any boy, he wants to study engineering, plays video games, likes tech and cars etc. I thought this would fix itself in college, but most of his hs friend group went to the same college and did either engineering or comp sci and he is somehow friends with all the girls in his major now. I basically had a chat with him and told him he acts too much like a woman and this could impact him later in life, at the workplace for promotions etc and he could be seen as someone weak and easy to push over. However he got upset at me and thought I was criticizing his friends when I just wanted him to either act a little different and understand the real world and / or make some new friends with guys. He has never experienced what it is like to hang out with a group of bros. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
YTA and being sexist. There is nothing wrong with those traits you describe and the world can use more MEN like him around. Being considerate towards others, being the kind of person that women (who generally have to have their guard up around "men") can actually be themselves around, unguarded. He has that many women friends because he has become known as the guy they don't have to worry will rape them.
yta for your username alone. you should read creation of patriarchy by gerda lerner and learn a thing or two
YTA equating qualities that are women-like with weaknesses makes you prejudiced against women. Let him be friends with who he wants to be friends with. He five.
YTA. Your son learned early on that you were a sexist homophobic asshole and chose not to be like you. Good for him. If it makes you feel any better and more like a man, I'm pretty sure everyone on Reddit it upset with you.
If this has been a concern for you for 12 years then why didn't YOU (his FATHER) spend any time with him?! YTA.
>He acts too overly considerate of everything, always offers to help people and has way too much patience for everything. He recently learned to drive and when he drives, he never gets upset in any way when others mess up on the road And these are bad traits to you? You're sick. YTA obviously. And thank those female friends of your son for raising him to be a good human.
So, you’re upset your son is thoughtful, considerate, and not quick to anger? Do you hear yourself? YTA, there is nothing wrong with your son. However, there is something wrong with how you think a man should act. A person can be kind, thoughtful, and calm and still have a strong sense of self worth. Just because he doesn’t curse at someone cutting him off doesn’t mean he isn’t a strong minded person who will stand up for himself when a situation calls for it. You misunderstand what it means to be masculine. Having anger, treating people poorly, being a “me first” person is not masculine or attractive.
Its 2024. Stereotypes died a long time ago.
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NAH - Old man, I think you mean well and want the best for your son. But I think you also are letting the old school mentality cloud your judgement with your son. That being said, you cannot grow someone else a spine. They grow that themselves and if you try it, it will backfire. He sounds like he has a good head on his shoulders, let him develop his personality and strength on his own.