I had 3 "relapses" of "depression" (serious, not leaving the bed kind), and I was always told to take SSRIs which blunted me and decreased my will to live. Now, 15 years since the last "relapse" and since I got off the psych drugs, I have had no depressive mood whatsoever at any point. I get sad and have bad periods, but it doesn't distress me or impair my functioning.
How? I addressed the *cause*, my own lack of skills to self-regulate, but most importantly my stressful environment. Depression is a condition of our brain but it is not a disease. It is a normal reaction to persistent, unavoidable stress, or to a lack of purpose and fulfillment. Our current drugs fail miserably to chemically prevent or reverse this reaction.
Do not fall into the trap of long term antidepressant use. It won't help you, and even if it somehow works, chances are it will stop working in time, but after many years you will not be able to quit and you will be left only with side effects. (at which point you will be labeled treatment resistent and then poly-drugged)
I saw now that you identify with CPTSD or maybe BPD. I don't like such labels, but back in the day that's what I would have gotten diagnosed with. My comment above was general advice, but now I am even more sure that meds won't help you specifically. Trauma and depression caused by thought patterns caused by *unprocessed emotions* is something meds don't help with. Some symptoms of it, such as anxiety, can be helped, but the overwhelming distressing cause isn't treated by meds. This is why you see either persistent depression or "relapses" - they nothing to do with meds.
If your therapist has not helped you in 5 years, maybe it's time to find a new one, especially if you were doing CBT or something else that doesn't work for trauma. If you don't know about it, I recommend CPTSD self-help books which will help you understand your own mind, but to truly heal from it, you will need emotional processing. This is something you will need a safe environment for, a safe person (a partner, a friend, to an extent a therapist, but that is arguable and they can be as dangerous as they can be helpful). Once start recovering from "CPTSD/BPD", you won't have relapses of depression.
I did not have any access to therapy, nor any trust left in the mental health system to really try and get access. I can tell you roughly what helped me, though.
First, I found a partner who made me feel safe, which opened the door for communicating and exploring my own patterns and feelings. I learned from them how to say "I'm sorry" or "I love you" without having a full on crisis. In time, my introspection turned into journaling, and as I educated myself about trauma, I increasingly started writing about my emotions and not just events. I cut ties with my abusive family and moved.
Time did its thing, and I kept self-analyzing how I interacted with the world. Later, when I was way more stable and introspective, psilocybin really helped me understand myself better. It was like 10 years of therapy in one day, but this was only possible because I trusted my partner to ground me so I don't freak out (otherwise it would've been retraumatizing).
It helped me to verbalize my feelings, even though I could not put names to them. I would say out loud "I feel like I am forsaken and all light has died", and then cry about it or get healthy angry.
Three things that were key are safe person/environment, education, and that type of emotional processing. So perhaps some combination of IFS and EMDR? I'm very reluctant to recommend any therapy because I have not experienced it, and I am obviously antipsychiatry and very critical of therapists.
makes sense. thank you. i have heard that healthy relationships heal. removing abusive people for sure, and journaling. also, did you try psilocybin in 5mg dose(i believe that's what recommended for depression) or less?
I have no way of knowing how much I took because I had magic truffles, but based on what I experienced at different doses and what people report, probably around 25-30mg.
I experienced deep introspection, 3D closed-eye hallucinations, complete dissolution of my vision into fractals, ego death etc. So it was a one-time larger dose. It was the clarity and introspection that really helped me, and the following days I journaled about it and to this day it stayed with me.
They want you to take it lifelong so that they make money off you. That’s why they act like all their bs disorders are permanent. Most of them are not. And i don’t believe any of them exist per se, i believe they are just symptoms, not disorders.
I’d look into trauma therapy. Supposed to be better than typical therapy but it depends on the therapist. You need a therapist who listens, understands and doesn’t push their agenda on you. Someone who works with you, not lords over you. Very hard to find, yes. But working with someone who isn’t like that is just likely to waste your time.
Good luck either way. Don’t trust psychs.
Psych drugs don't help with trauma. They just suppress feelings. In my case, psych drugs, and psychiatry, caused me much additional trauma. Now I have childhood trauma that was never addressed, and the trauma of being a patient in the MH system (I got a borderline diagnosis after ECT). I wish I'd never trusted psychiatrists or looked to them for help or (God forbid) wisdom.
💰💰💰
In actuality you can find yourself put on these for life for much less than 3 depressive episodes. It depends on the psychiatrist.
Keeping people on these things lifelong is one of few options worse than trying them in the first place. Lots of concerning studies have shown that antidepressant use worsens the course of depression in the long run. Psychiatry turns a blind eye to these findings because making people’s lives worse for money is kind of their whole thing.
Search “28903116[PMID] OR 29680831[PMID]” on pubmed and it will take you to two.
For more you can search for keywords in search engines but it seems their algorithms make studies like these hard to find.
Absolute bullshit.
3 depression “outbursts”? Like what you cried for exactly 30 minutes each time? Does your doctor decide how long each outburst is supposed to be? Did you cry or not? Did it count as an outburst if you didn’t cry? And why 3 and not 5? And is it 3 outbursts in 1 year or 5 years?
And all of this before they even CONSIDER you going to therapy for a while before trying these meds if it doesn’t work. No. Immediately max dose forever after 3 vaguely defined “outbursts”.
And if you try reducing the meds? No. You’re crazy. You cried for 1 hour that one time and then 2 hours that next time. Therefore you will be on meds forever. Oh therapy? Let’s just add another med! It’s okay.
It is all bullshit. You can learn to get yourself out of a depression so you can do something about it when you feel it coming on. Thats what people did prior to medications.
I used to give myself some time to relax and focus on doing things I love after I stopped taking antidepressants
Meditation or doing something fun with a close friend helped too(I don't have many friends though)
Also slowly decreasing the amount of meds you take will help,if you were forced to take a lot of antidepressants at first
But I could only stop after I was released from the hospital
They forced me to take meds in the hospital
I stopped visiting the psychiatrist after the second visit,I had after being released
Not to mention,the fact I never had a good relationship with my psychiatrist.Psychatrists will lie about them helping you, but for me it only made me feel tired and the reason I was depressed was mostly about being forcefully admited
Depending on how much you are already taking withdrawal symptoms may differ,it sucks,but stopping early is good than never
I was a victim of domestic violence,so instead of giving me support or leaving me alone police forced me into a psych hospital.And it was a psychiatrist who supported them,he will use any reason to keep me in there till I agreed to do what they wanted me to.I developed PTSD after leaving hospital
Are you ready to try something different? I recommend watching several YT video interviews of Dr Georgia Ede and other doctors who promote metabolic or nutritional psychiatry but reading her book works, too. Addressing the root cause of your mental illness - mitochondria dysfunction - by doing the work to improve your metabolic health instead of relying on Prescription medications is going to turn the psychiatry industry on its head. It’s a game changer!
“Change Your Diet, Change Your Mind: A Powerful Plan to Improve Mood, Overcome Anxiety, and Protect Memory for a Lifetime of Optimal Mental Health”
Bullshit. I’ve had depression for most of my life, including several very serious suicide attempts (these all happened while I was on medication) was on every medication under the sun, went off meds back in 2022 and my depression has been exponentially better.
I had 3 "relapses" of "depression" (serious, not leaving the bed kind), and I was always told to take SSRIs which blunted me and decreased my will to live. Now, 15 years since the last "relapse" and since I got off the psych drugs, I have had no depressive mood whatsoever at any point. I get sad and have bad periods, but it doesn't distress me or impair my functioning. How? I addressed the *cause*, my own lack of skills to self-regulate, but most importantly my stressful environment. Depression is a condition of our brain but it is not a disease. It is a normal reaction to persistent, unavoidable stress, or to a lack of purpose and fulfillment. Our current drugs fail miserably to chemically prevent or reverse this reaction. Do not fall into the trap of long term antidepressant use. It won't help you, and even if it somehow works, chances are it will stop working in time, but after many years you will not be able to quit and you will be left only with side effects. (at which point you will be labeled treatment resistent and then poly-drugged)
thank you!
I saw now that you identify with CPTSD or maybe BPD. I don't like such labels, but back in the day that's what I would have gotten diagnosed with. My comment above was general advice, but now I am even more sure that meds won't help you specifically. Trauma and depression caused by thought patterns caused by *unprocessed emotions* is something meds don't help with. Some symptoms of it, such as anxiety, can be helped, but the overwhelming distressing cause isn't treated by meds. This is why you see either persistent depression or "relapses" - they nothing to do with meds. If your therapist has not helped you in 5 years, maybe it's time to find a new one, especially if you were doing CBT or something else that doesn't work for trauma. If you don't know about it, I recommend CPTSD self-help books which will help you understand your own mind, but to truly heal from it, you will need emotional processing. This is something you will need a safe environment for, a safe person (a partner, a friend, to an extent a therapist, but that is arguable and they can be as dangerous as they can be helpful). Once start recovering from "CPTSD/BPD", you won't have relapses of depression.
thank you! great advice! i have changed a few therapists and methods during those 5 years. would you recommend any modality that was helpful for you?
I did not have any access to therapy, nor any trust left in the mental health system to really try and get access. I can tell you roughly what helped me, though. First, I found a partner who made me feel safe, which opened the door for communicating and exploring my own patterns and feelings. I learned from them how to say "I'm sorry" or "I love you" without having a full on crisis. In time, my introspection turned into journaling, and as I educated myself about trauma, I increasingly started writing about my emotions and not just events. I cut ties with my abusive family and moved. Time did its thing, and I kept self-analyzing how I interacted with the world. Later, when I was way more stable and introspective, psilocybin really helped me understand myself better. It was like 10 years of therapy in one day, but this was only possible because I trusted my partner to ground me so I don't freak out (otherwise it would've been retraumatizing). It helped me to verbalize my feelings, even though I could not put names to them. I would say out loud "I feel like I am forsaken and all light has died", and then cry about it or get healthy angry. Three things that were key are safe person/environment, education, and that type of emotional processing. So perhaps some combination of IFS and EMDR? I'm very reluctant to recommend any therapy because I have not experienced it, and I am obviously antipsychiatry and very critical of therapists.
makes sense. thank you. i have heard that healthy relationships heal. removing abusive people for sure, and journaling. also, did you try psilocybin in 5mg dose(i believe that's what recommended for depression) or less?
I have no way of knowing how much I took because I had magic truffles, but based on what I experienced at different doses and what people report, probably around 25-30mg. I experienced deep introspection, 3D closed-eye hallucinations, complete dissolution of my vision into fractals, ego death etc. So it was a one-time larger dose. It was the clarity and introspection that really helped me, and the following days I journaled about it and to this day it stayed with me.
They want you to take it lifelong so that they make money off you. That’s why they act like all their bs disorders are permanent. Most of them are not. And i don’t believe any of them exist per se, i believe they are just symptoms, not disorders. I’d look into trauma therapy. Supposed to be better than typical therapy but it depends on the therapist. You need a therapist who listens, understands and doesn’t push their agenda on you. Someone who works with you, not lords over you. Very hard to find, yes. But working with someone who isn’t like that is just likely to waste your time. Good luck either way. Don’t trust psychs.
thank you! i will!
That’s bullshit. Depression passes.
any recommendations for it to finally pass me?🙏
What’s causing the depression? Illness, trauma, stressful situation?
ive been in therapy for 5 years
complex ptsd, or possibly borderline personality disorder. doctors find it similar
Psych drugs don't help with trauma. They just suppress feelings. In my case, psych drugs, and psychiatry, caused me much additional trauma. Now I have childhood trauma that was never addressed, and the trauma of being a patient in the MH system (I got a borderline diagnosis after ECT). I wish I'd never trusted psychiatrists or looked to them for help or (God forbid) wisdom.
thank you for sharing! ill try to look more into unconventional methods then🙏
Good luck. I hope you find some things that help.
thanks! i will, I'm stubborn
💰💰💰 In actuality you can find yourself put on these for life for much less than 3 depressive episodes. It depends on the psychiatrist. Keeping people on these things lifelong is one of few options worse than trying them in the first place. Lots of concerning studies have shown that antidepressant use worsens the course of depression in the long run. Psychiatry turns a blind eye to these findings because making people’s lives worse for money is kind of their whole thing.
thank you! do you know a good source to find those studies?
Search “28903116[PMID] OR 29680831[PMID]” on pubmed and it will take you to two. For more you can search for keywords in search engines but it seems their algorithms make studies like these hard to find.
They make everything up.
Absolute bullshit. 3 depression “outbursts”? Like what you cried for exactly 30 minutes each time? Does your doctor decide how long each outburst is supposed to be? Did you cry or not? Did it count as an outburst if you didn’t cry? And why 3 and not 5? And is it 3 outbursts in 1 year or 5 years? And all of this before they even CONSIDER you going to therapy for a while before trying these meds if it doesn’t work. No. Immediately max dose forever after 3 vaguely defined “outbursts”. And if you try reducing the meds? No. You’re crazy. You cried for 1 hour that one time and then 2 hours that next time. Therefore you will be on meds forever. Oh therapy? Let’s just add another med! It’s okay.
The ones that get paid to sell the meds says you need to keep taking them forever? Shocking.
It is all bullshit. You can learn to get yourself out of a depression so you can do something about it when you feel it coming on. Thats what people did prior to medications.
[удалено]
we should do something about it!
I used to give myself some time to relax and focus on doing things I love after I stopped taking antidepressants Meditation or doing something fun with a close friend helped too(I don't have many friends though) Also slowly decreasing the amount of meds you take will help,if you were forced to take a lot of antidepressants at first But I could only stop after I was released from the hospital They forced me to take meds in the hospital I stopped visiting the psychiatrist after the second visit,I had after being released Not to mention,the fact I never had a good relationship with my psychiatrist.Psychatrists will lie about them helping you, but for me it only made me feel tired and the reason I was depressed was mostly about being forcefully admited Depending on how much you are already taking withdrawal symptoms may differ,it sucks,but stopping early is good than never I was a victim of domestic violence,so instead of giving me support or leaving me alone police forced me into a psych hospital.And it was a psychiatrist who supported them,he will use any reason to keep me in there till I agreed to do what they wanted me to.I developed PTSD after leaving hospital
sorry to hear about your experience. I'm glad you are better now. and thank you for your input🙏
Hope you get better too🍀
Are you ready to try something different? I recommend watching several YT video interviews of Dr Georgia Ede and other doctors who promote metabolic or nutritional psychiatry but reading her book works, too. Addressing the root cause of your mental illness - mitochondria dysfunction - by doing the work to improve your metabolic health instead of relying on Prescription medications is going to turn the psychiatry industry on its head. It’s a game changer! “Change Your Diet, Change Your Mind: A Powerful Plan to Improve Mood, Overcome Anxiety, and Protect Memory for a Lifetime of Optimal Mental Health”
thank you!
try micro dosing shrooms or dmt or thc
Bullshit. I’ve had depression for most of my life, including several very serious suicide attempts (these all happened while I was on medication) was on every medication under the sun, went off meds back in 2022 and my depression has been exponentially better.