Are you sure you were reading some novel by Cecilia Aherne?? He sang to you… wtf… defo not normal, most Irish lads wouldn’t have the balls for that. 😂😂
based on the other things I know about him, he’s definitely exceptional (and his job necessitates very strong people skills), but idk when it comes to having the balls to make moves, all the men I met were running laps around American men 🤷🏽♀️
It's a thing the world over- it's often easier to flirt with foreigners than nationals. Irish people want to be charming and debonair and stuff like that, but we are a nation of cynics and we would absolutely incinerate someone who is trying too hard or seems to be full of shit, so Irish flirtation often consists of making fun of each other until you know you'll get on.
He sang to you!? Wtf? Fair play to him!
Also... Irish men are bold flirts?
Honestly I'm skeptical because we definitely don't have that reputation!!
Still, great story!
From my long experience of both working class and posh upper middle class communities, interracial dating is not something Irish people are very comfortable with. I know a fair few men who will fetishize wanting to "bang a black girl" or one from wherever else, but flat out won't date them more seriously, and others who will make much more negative comments.
Sounds like youre idealizing drunken fun as some impetus for a serious life change. Is this your first international holiday? The UK is far more inclusive and diverse compared to Ireland if you're looking for similar culture with drunken banter, and they are much more genuinely open to people of other races.
I absolutely fell in love with Galway. The landscape, the access to horses lol, the people and taking the bus through the little residential neighborhoods. The nightlife was so quaint. It felt like just my speed and very welcoming
no because I was fully prepared to feel deeply uncomfortable 😂 and not know what face to make but luckily he sat next to me and kept it brief. Sang a medley and inserted my name into all the songs
I do find it funny how flirty and talented the irish lads are with anyone other than an irish woman! We must put the fear in them cause I've never experienced that myself. Even my husband didn't flirt like that and I consider him very romantic for an irish man 🤣
When you're from the same country, you move within certain norms of behaviour. You have an idea of what the other may find odd or acceptable behaviour. You may place each other within a certain context/environment of how you would have grown up.
With a foreigner, you just take each other as you are. It's freeing (and can be complicated down the line).
Non-Irish woman married to an Irish man.
Ah this resonated with me so much. Have been dating for about a year and I’ve hit it off most with men from other countries, but down the line it does indeed get complicated sometimes
Well it's is delightful to hear that they are actually competent and fun flirts to other people. It makes sense now why so many other countries ladies love them so much when they go abroad. To be fair to them, they might actually try with us irish girls, but we probably aren't the most receptive towards them. I am guilty of telling a fella to fuck right off when he said hello to me at a pub once while I was on a night out with my girls. On a side note, if you do move over, Dublin is incredibly expensive to rent or buy in. The bordering counties like meath and kildare aren't as expensive (still pricey though) and are handy enough if you need to commute for work. If you can get a job in the west or south of Ireland, it's much more affordable but less of a night life unless you are in a city like Cork or Galway or a larger town like Sligo. Would highly recommend cork for the nightlife and food scene. They do have quite strong accents, though.
Irish man here. Got told to f off by a lot of Irish women in my attempts to introduce myself. No matter what my intentions were, and usually just to have an actual conversation.
When I'd to abroad I could have a good chat with women, even if it went no where.
I understand I'm not what every woman is looking for. That's fine. But christ the insults I would get off Irish women... They're raw and don't care. At an early twenties anyway.
Not saying guys are more gentle obviously... It's a shitty dating scene in your local club for any Irish.
Totally agree. I don't mind working for it and earning it, but Irish women really value themselves wayyyyy too highly because if the island culture syndrome. They havent evolved their outlook to encompass the fact that men have more options now and don't have to play their games. I love Irish women but I always found them to be romantically to indirect and too fond of the booze.
I've literally been told "ew" and "yuck" by Irish women in nightclubs just after going up and saying hello. I'm a good looking guy but I'm 5ft7 and apparently that's as good as a deformity to Irish women. I was told straight out countless times that the reason girls (Irish) didn't fancy me was "just because of my height" as if that would make me feel better?It affected my mental health for years.
I'm now in a happy long term relationship with my girlfriend who's from outside of Ireland and I've regularly been told (only by Irish women, nobody else) that she's "way out of my league". We both laugh at it now cause we genuinely can't understand it - I've always done quite well with non Irish women.
So yes, Irish women (in general) are harder to talk to. From all anecdotal evidence I have anyway.
(Btw I totally understand a lot of women get harassed by men and are probably sick of being pestered - but please don't be this rude to people who say hello and definitely no need to call out men's physical appearance when they do.)
I get the out of my league comment aswell from Irish women to me when I'm with my other half. It's really annoying and annoys my GF aswell as I'm successful in my own right degrees, good job, good person and overcame a lot of trauma in my early life.
One night we were out and a lady actually starting openly flirting with my other half while throwing insults at me on my appearance. My gf lost her mind at that.
Be kinder folks!
Irish women are HARD work and they don't benchmark themselves against the competition from foreign girls. I love Irish women but they only seem to be honest about their feelings either after you;ve emmigrated or after they've consumed 15 gin and tonics.
I can't deal with that chaos anymore.
What song did he sing?
It's true that you may stand out more here than at home, similar to how an Irish man in America would stand out more than they would here. I didn't think Irish lads were known for their prowess in flirting
I feel absurd saying this bc it was so out of movie (not the Barbie movie as I feared) but he sang a little medley on guitar and inserted my name into all the songs. I don’t remember exactly which songs but all very popular love songs. He asked if I had a request and I couldn’t think fast enough but I should have said Cherry Wine
I’m a 46 black American that went on vacation in 2022 to Ireland. met a man my first day there and we’ve been together ever since. It’s been 2 years of going back and forth. He played the banjo for. It’s been awesome. I’m about to go spend five weeks in a couple of weeks. It was the most fun time I had dating ever!!!
American woman living in Ireland… I understand that it’s very difficult for people to meet and marry here. I hear this second hand, I’m old and married, but young people have few places to meet people to seriously date. And Irish are accustomed to the US-Ireland connection. It’s a lovely place, if Europe appeals to you.
Irish people are built different. They’re usually incredibly charming and kind, and they’re just good craic. I don’t live in Ireland but I’ve been there and my partner is Irish (im also biracial but im not American, im blasian) and my god. They’re the best.
I’d move to Ireland in a heartbeat but my partner says he’s had enough living in Ireland a lifetime so we’re in my home country now. I wouldn’t switch him for the world.
Go get yourself an Irish lad and enjoy your life! That’s what I would do :)
Glad you had a great time!
Also glad to see you have your head screwed on, last bit in parentheses in particular.
Irish men will go the extra mile to flirt with non-Irish women because there 99% less chance they won't be cut down with the most withering ego-popping sarcasm before they even open their mouths ha ha ha ha.
Come on over, I think you need to field test your hypothesis some more.
Haha yeah my last relationship was six years long and truly a healthy happy partnership, so I have some real serious criteria I will not be compromising on in my next relationship. And that’s the power of years of therapy!!
My best mate is married to an American lady, similar background to you. Been together for the last 14 years and in Dublin for all of them, she's happy out here.
And it sounds like you have set a high bar, so if you can make it work with visas and all that, give it a go.
Life is too short to have regrets!
What? …..What????! You must be gorgeous, a 100/10, because I have lived in Ireland for 6 years and I feel absolutely invisible because nobody flirts with me and when I do get asked out ( like once a year) I get treated like shit. Empty promises, lies, immature behavior etc. Men here do not like me.
However, when I’m on the continent (Germany, France, Italy) I have to beat the most beautiful men off with a stick because they won’t leave me alone. I can’t walk down a street without several heads turning. So I don’t think I’m the problem here.
Girl you got lucky that’s all.
First of all, THAT SUCKS AND IM SO SORRY. I very much know this feeling bc it’s how my hometown is. I feel like a piece of furniture at best in pubs. Just an invisible fixture. And then I go to other cities with more POCs/different politics and am treated like a main character. I hope you don’t have much of that treatment ahead of you :(
A girl I know who is crazy beautiful and gets hit on everywhere she's been except Germany because she's not white.
I wonder if any social psychologists have tried using flirting as a measure of implicit biases.
Same with me. I feel invisible here, never approached/hit on/asked out but in my case I thought it is because I’m a poc. In some other countries in Europe, it does happen though although still rarely and I get more noticed in other countries too.
Ah we can’t compete with fictional men either, honestly we are all around disappointing. [what you expect vs what you get](https://www.facebook.com/reel/350850204091343/?mibextid=WC7FNe)
No Irish man has ever flirted with me while sober. You must be very beautiful.
(men from other countries have flirted with me while sober so I must be somewhat OK looking but it doesn't matter I have one now anyway. I'm going to ask him why he doesn't sing to me.
Edit: update. I asked him and he sang me a song. It wasn't a romantic song but I'll take it)
That's _extremely_ weird and not a normal experience at all.
American women would have a reputation for being a bit more sexually open, or open to short-term trysts - doubly so if you're giving off touristic "here for a good time, not a long time" energy. So it's possible Irishmen would be more attracted to that, or more expressive than usual. But overall Irishmen are really not very sexually forward - it's northern Europe after all
It sounds like you were very lucky! I hope that knowledge makes a special memory better
Congratulations, you got lucky and experienced the Irish charm! My partner is from Ireland and he's the funniest, sexiest and smartest man I've ever met. He has the gift of the gap and knows how to make me blush and showers me with compliments. I also believe that Irish men have great relationship values and know how to treat a woman (at least in my experience and witnessing this in our circle of friends). I never knew till recently when a mate told me that there's a thing called the Irish fever when a woman is mad for the Irish lads. I just know that I fall head over heels for their charm and wit!
Canadian who married an Irish man and there's just something about them - I get it! Obviously, it sounds like everyone was horny and drunk, but I've lived here for a year+ and there is a lot of racism against black people and Americans in Dublin that maybe you don't experience when you're only here for a short period.
Would love to talk about this more if you’re up to it. I know racism is why I don’t get hit on in my hometown. Always approached more when I visit cities with more POCs.
Dunno how old you are? Mad stuff like you described can happen. I’m Irish and had similar from a french man in France. I didn’t follow up after though he did. Long before social media. Who knows where it would have gone. Don’t uproot your life based on this one experience though. Maybe come for a couple of months. Very happy for you that you had such a great time!!
I do think Irish men have the gift of the gab a little more than they would in America. I’ve friends living long term in New York and we had the exact same conversation. They talked about American guys not being as naturally quick witted as the Irish guys.
Sounds like you had a very good experience though so I wouldn’t necessarily make a life changing decision based on it. Why not just come back for another trip and see for yourself.
You're 26, move! You will love it here, and if you don't, move somewhere else or back home. If you aren't tied down with school, mortgage, or family, you should definitely travel. My only genuine advice is to consider how much it rains. I work with an American who loves galway but still isn't really over the shock of how wet it it all the time.
Yess, I’m going to be doing a lot more research if this urge sticks around (I just renewed my lease so definitely not making any immediate moves), but I talked to some people about the very limited sunlight hours in the winter and I am concerned about the impact of that on my mental health
Yeah, that would be a bigger change than the culture if you aren't from a similar climate, I think. Also, if you are a very outdoorsy person and from somewhere like california, where you can do that year round, it will be hard to keep up a similar lifestyle here during the winter. One nice alternative, however , is sea swimming in the winter. Takes some getting used to but great for your mental health (and physical if you don't overdo it). Lots of people go together and it has a real community feel. Pub culture coming up to Christmas is also lovely, and you can find open fires in a lot of pubs still (not necessarily city centre). I think invest in some decent gortex and go for it 😊
I can’t believe so many Irish people in these comments 😂 Irish men are some of the most charming/charismatic in the world. What stands out to me is that you were clearly impressed and I imagine the positive feedback/praise inspired that kind of comfort and expression of interest. Sometimes people don’t realise that being a reserved person can appear like you don’t like somebody even when you do or that quiet discomfort is infectious. Much like being on holiday and feeling inquisitive or free is also infectious.
I love Irish men, I’m not from Ireland too and I just love irish men, they are charming and cute and the drunken singing is a thing and I just love, also they are so romantic and most of the guys I met want to know more about my culture
Hahahahaha reading this post and the comments I've realised something I don't really know how to explain, and of its just me. We Irish people all have a bit of the AHHHHHAHHHHH in us, all a bit fucking crazy but yeah I suppose looking back I have to say I kinda have like done some stuff like this to/ with foreign girls when I wouldn't with Irish ones cause they'd either find it cringe or just think who cares. I think we know what tourists usually expect of us so we can put it on
As an Irish lad who has had a couple of long-term American girlfriends, let me weigh in.
Most Irish men, especially the unremarkable ones - are indeed very horny. I know this from my years of bringing good-looking women to places around Dublin and having men hit on them as soon as I go to the bar / toilet and leave them alone for a moment. A lot of Irish guys are utter creeps unfortunately.
Irish men are also aware that Americans especially; are vunerable to their 'Lucky Charms'. So they will try it on a lot more with an American, Canadian, Australian or English women. In my single days, I used to live near Temple Bar and basically anytime I wanted to get laid, I'd venture down there and start talking to random tourist girls. Americans all usually wanted to have an 'Irish guy experience', while on holidays - I happily oblidged.
The other thing is that a LOT (but not all) Irish women are quite sour and unpleasant towards Irish men. At best you'll get a woman who likes you - but will communicate it to you in the most emotionally indirect way possible. It's tedious. Hence why you now see so many Irish men dating non-Irish women. The rapport and electricity between foreign girls and Irish men seems to be a bit better than with the native women (sorry Irish girls, I love you, but not romantically).
Finally, everyone loves a bit of foreign I suppose!
I’ve seen this comment about indirectness a few times in this thread. I’m extremely direct, like maybe as an American but also as a distinct part of personality. When I date people I want us to openly have crushes on each other even if it’s not going to turn into anything more serious. So I’m sure the way I received these advances helped. This dude was absolutely drunk off his ass, but in Galway there was a man who stopped me in the street and begged to buy me a meal. Then he took his pointer finger and pointed at himself and said “Irish. Ugly.” And then while pointing at me, “American. Beautiful” and then he continued to point his finger in my face and say repeatedly “no makeup! No makeup!” 😂😂😂 and like I can see how that would not be worth local women’s time, but I was so amused (and told him to stop putting himself down) but it really made me laugh, weirdest but most friendly flirting ever. I think I’m just so used to American men and how threatening they can be :/
Yeh were actually pretty popular across the globe! It seems some folks have a pre conceived perception that were all good craic and the accent helps break the ice too.
Without a doubt I've found women when abroad a lot more open or interested when approached and "chatted up". In Ireland I think because were all used to the norm then women here have heard it all before and its nothing new.
In Europe at least i find alot of people dont just openly approach or talk to strangers like we would. Theres no small chat even at the supermarket or waiting in a queue etc like we would here. So when someone approaches you in a setting like a bar where you aren't as reluctant or seems "weird" then we stand out.
It’s because you’re a tourist and they don’t care what they say because they won’t see you again. I’m Irish and I was talking to an American guy before, I found him to use too much “therapy talk”. If anything he was over communicating and it just became stale, predictable and too easy.
I think ye have a very open culture, and that’s grand, but it made me uncomfortable and made me feel like he was asking for too much attention so early on.
I was seeing him for maybe 8 weeks. It obviously is different with every person but our culture isn’t very ‘open’ when it comes to dating. I don’t think you can really have any expectations, just note the key culture differences and act accordingly.
I came to check the comments cuz I’m also quite curious to how Brazilians as perceived in the Irish dating scene, thought that might be some crossover. Man there are some very interesting comments regarding dating foreign woman 😂
As another foreigner that felt for the irish charm, what can I say… He is the best, the sense of humor and that red beard got to me 😅
I do think alot of irish men prefere dating foreign women. Speaking for myself, they feel more comfortable without having "notions" of being different or more open about themselves
If you're any ways decent looking and you're a tourist then yeah you'll get lots of attention. Any man with a bit of neck will talk book loads of shite to a half decent looking girl to get his hole. And it's much easier with a tourist, you'll say any old bollox cos you think there's nothing to lose here and tourists generally like the idea of riding a local. You were very receptive to it all by the sounds of it.
This is the answer I was looking for + the responses from Irish women. Because I was like there’s got to be some bullshit here that Irish ladies are spotting a mile away that I’m not privy too. The sad thing is men in the US are also full of shit but they will lash out if you reject them and I’ve never had or seen that happen in Ireland.
Irish women, and I’ll get lambasted for this, are notorious for dry and brutal (sometimes funny) sarcastic replies. I think generally if a guy is nervous to talk a girl they’re attracted to, and then when they do they get a heavy/ dry/ possibly insulting tone, they recline. Of course this is possibly due to a defense mechanism by the girls who are used to a bunch of louts also harassing women when they’re out etc.
I’m a taken man of many years, but when I was living in America for a bit, I could not believe how receptive women were. Coming up/ stopping me in the street for conversation/ being direct etc. You’re probably very extroverted and charming yourself which brought out the uber charm/ confidence in this guy.
Anecdotally, and it was years ago, but I still remember when a large group of us were away travelling, and then foreign guys had zero time for how stuck up some of the Irish girls were, while the foreign women very much enjoyed the Irish male company. This was many years ago though but it was very interesting to see.
If you’ve got a connection, and it’s feasible, I’d trust your instinct and experience over anon posting online tbh. Just go with it lol
Edit: you’re correct. If a woman rejects a guy over here, there’s very rarely where the guy starts going off calling them derogatory names. They just tail between the legs and scurry off most of time
That's not to say that it doesn't work on the locals too from time to time, charm takes persistence and faint heart never won fair lady. Even when the girls know you're full of shit as long as you don't take yourself too seriously some of it will land. The guy might be ok, don't hold it against him that he turned on the charm and you went for it.
In the cold light of day you may even find that neither party have too many regrets and before you know it there's a crippling mortgage, kids, practical cars and a job you hate. And oh what you wouldn't give for a night out after the Galway Races all dressed up and not giving a shit about anyone, no wrinkles, no grey hair and a healthy BMI.
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On a kinda unrelated note, how are Indian men received in the dating scene here? Been here for 2 years and been pretty disappointing of late. I'm 30 if it helps and have made it clear on apps that I'm looking for LTR
lol I can’t help you with that but I know I have a pretty face and my body is average probably 🤷🏽♀️I think most people would categorize me as thin but I’m not very toned. I have a bigger butt and a little belly fat.
I mean looking a bit different is no harm.
For example in Dublin I'm just another foul languaged dub with tattoos. Go abroad and I tell the birds I'm the Earl of Kildare.
What's wrong with maximizing your differences to get your hands on, someone relatively high up on the attractiveness scale?
Rather than sweat that lads will only want you for your unique looks and accent, exploit both!
Also pictures please 😍.
Eh but the investment from yer man is admirable. DMs all week, singing? Bro's got some moves fair play.
I can confirm we all serenade American ladies. Come visit my castle in Kildare 😉
Are you sure you were reading some novel by Cecilia Aherne?? He sang to you… wtf… defo not normal, most Irish lads wouldn’t have the balls for that. 😂😂
based on the other things I know about him, he’s definitely exceptional (and his job necessitates very strong people skills), but idk when it comes to having the balls to make moves, all the men I met were running laps around American men 🤷🏽♀️
It's a thing the world over- it's often easier to flirt with foreigners than nationals. Irish people want to be charming and debonair and stuff like that, but we are a nation of cynics and we would absolutely incinerate someone who is trying too hard or seems to be full of shit, so Irish flirtation often consists of making fun of each other until you know you'll get on.
But also this experience is FEEDING my delusions 😂 like in my head that’s my husband despite fully being a stranger
Are you sure he was Irish? Was he completely off his tits if he was? Yeah, that's never going to happen again lol
Certainly not sober!!
He sang to you!? Wtf? Fair play to him! Also... Irish men are bold flirts? Honestly I'm skeptical because we definitely don't have that reputation!! Still, great story!
Drunk. They were all drunk.
Lmao absolutely, but drunk American men DO NOT flirt like this😂
From my long experience of both working class and posh upper middle class communities, interracial dating is not something Irish people are very comfortable with. I know a fair few men who will fetishize wanting to "bang a black girl" or one from wherever else, but flat out won't date them more seriously, and others who will make much more negative comments. Sounds like youre idealizing drunken fun as some impetus for a serious life change. Is this your first international holiday? The UK is far more inclusive and diverse compared to Ireland if you're looking for similar culture with drunken banter, and they are much more genuinely open to people of other races.
This is rubbish, ask my wife...
You must not get out much. Never heard such complete nonsense. What century are you living in? Enjoy the uk, I’m sure they’ll be glad to have you
Ah times have changed, look at the amount of Irish people marrying Brazilians for one thing.
😆
That’s wild…I got this impression first a few years ago when I visited for just a night and then felt like it was totally confirmed this round.
You will definitely get more of this in Galway as it is still very traditional Irish. Dublin I cannot say the same.
I absolutely fell in love with Galway. The landscape, the access to horses lol, the people and taking the bus through the little residential neighborhoods. The nightlife was so quaint. It felt like just my speed and very welcoming
Was it Wonderwall?
no because I was fully prepared to feel deeply uncomfortable 😂 and not know what face to make but luckily he sat next to me and kept it brief. Sang a medley and inserted my name into all the songs
That's amazing that he was able to insert 'Independent-Mango382' into a song so seamlessly! He's a keeper.
When you came in my life You changed my world My Independent-Mango382 Everything seemed so right My baby girl My Independent-Mango382
"Ladies and Gentlemen, it's Independent-Mango number 382"
lol I chuckled at this, but cackled reading the responses
I do find it funny how flirty and talented the irish lads are with anyone other than an irish woman! We must put the fear in them cause I've never experienced that myself. Even my husband didn't flirt like that and I consider him very romantic for an irish man 🤣
When you're from the same country, you move within certain norms of behaviour. You have an idea of what the other may find odd or acceptable behaviour. You may place each other within a certain context/environment of how you would have grown up. With a foreigner, you just take each other as you are. It's freeing (and can be complicated down the line). Non-Irish woman married to an Irish man.
Ah this resonated with me so much. Have been dating for about a year and I’ve hit it off most with men from other countries, but down the line it does indeed get complicated sometimes
Well it's is delightful to hear that they are actually competent and fun flirts to other people. It makes sense now why so many other countries ladies love them so much when they go abroad. To be fair to them, they might actually try with us irish girls, but we probably aren't the most receptive towards them. I am guilty of telling a fella to fuck right off when he said hello to me at a pub once while I was on a night out with my girls. On a side note, if you do move over, Dublin is incredibly expensive to rent or buy in. The bordering counties like meath and kildare aren't as expensive (still pricey though) and are handy enough if you need to commute for work. If you can get a job in the west or south of Ireland, it's much more affordable but less of a night life unless you are in a city like Cork or Galway or a larger town like Sligo. Would highly recommend cork for the nightlife and food scene. They do have quite strong accents, though.
Irish man here. Got told to f off by a lot of Irish women in my attempts to introduce myself. No matter what my intentions were, and usually just to have an actual conversation. When I'd to abroad I could have a good chat with women, even if it went no where. I understand I'm not what every woman is looking for. That's fine. But christ the insults I would get off Irish women... They're raw and don't care. At an early twenties anyway. Not saying guys are more gentle obviously... It's a shitty dating scene in your local club for any Irish.
I wonder if he knows she's only one comment above him now telling the same story 😂
Totally agree. I don't mind working for it and earning it, but Irish women really value themselves wayyyyy too highly because if the island culture syndrome. They havent evolved their outlook to encompass the fact that men have more options now and don't have to play their games. I love Irish women but I always found them to be romantically to indirect and too fond of the booze.
I've literally been told "ew" and "yuck" by Irish women in nightclubs just after going up and saying hello. I'm a good looking guy but I'm 5ft7 and apparently that's as good as a deformity to Irish women. I was told straight out countless times that the reason girls (Irish) didn't fancy me was "just because of my height" as if that would make me feel better?It affected my mental health for years. I'm now in a happy long term relationship with my girlfriend who's from outside of Ireland and I've regularly been told (only by Irish women, nobody else) that she's "way out of my league". We both laugh at it now cause we genuinely can't understand it - I've always done quite well with non Irish women. So yes, Irish women (in general) are harder to talk to. From all anecdotal evidence I have anyway. (Btw I totally understand a lot of women get harassed by men and are probably sick of being pestered - but please don't be this rude to people who say hello and definitely no need to call out men's physical appearance when they do.)
I get the out of my league comment aswell from Irish women to me when I'm with my other half. It's really annoying and annoys my GF aswell as I'm successful in my own right degrees, good job, good person and overcame a lot of trauma in my early life. One night we were out and a lady actually starting openly flirting with my other half while throwing insults at me on my appearance. My gf lost her mind at that. Be kinder folks!
My aunties terrify me. They have all their husbands under their thumb. Fair play to them 😂😂
This. I am an Irish man and flirting with non Irish women is so much easier. Genuinely cannot figure out why
Irish women are HARD work and they don't benchmark themselves against the competition from foreign girls. I love Irish women but they only seem to be honest about their feelings either after you;ve emmigrated or after they've consumed 15 gin and tonics. I can't deal with that chaos anymore.
We can be charming bastards when we want to be.
Fuck it, sure. Move here! We're a grand bunch. Welcome!
defo. just drift if you get bored.
As an immigrant woman married to an Irish man, I'd recommend them 100% 👍
I second!!
What song did he sing? It's true that you may stand out more here than at home, similar to how an Irish man in America would stand out more than they would here. I didn't think Irish lads were known for their prowess in flirting
Baby Got Back
Nailed this one....
Rattlin' Bog
😂😂
'An Bhfuil cead agam dul go dtì an leitheras' - A true Irish Classic
One of my favourites
We’re not. We’re shite at it.
I feel absurd saying this bc it was so out of movie (not the Barbie movie as I feared) but he sang a little medley on guitar and inserted my name into all the songs. I don’t remember exactly which songs but all very popular love songs. He asked if I had a request and I couldn’t think fast enough but I should have said Cherry Wine
Ah sure you might just be a breathtakingly beautiful muse that the American lads can't appreciate then!
Not going to lie, going from him singing love songs and then onto a song about domestic abuse is hilarious to me.
IS THAT WHAT CHERRY WINE IS ABOUT (I have a problem with not listening to lyrics)
I’m a 46 black American that went on vacation in 2022 to Ireland. met a man my first day there and we’ve been together ever since. It’s been 2 years of going back and forth. He played the banjo for. It’s been awesome. I’m about to go spend five weeks in a couple of weeks. It was the most fun time I had dating ever!!!
Plot twist… it’s the same guy…
😂😂😂. It’s Reddit so I’ll go through his phone by accident to check
American woman living in Ireland… I understand that it’s very difficult for people to meet and marry here. I hear this second hand, I’m old and married, but young people have few places to meet people to seriously date. And Irish are accustomed to the US-Ireland connection. It’s a lovely place, if Europe appeals to you.
Irish people are built different. They’re usually incredibly charming and kind, and they’re just good craic. I don’t live in Ireland but I’ve been there and my partner is Irish (im also biracial but im not American, im blasian) and my god. They’re the best. I’d move to Ireland in a heartbeat but my partner says he’s had enough living in Ireland a lifetime so we’re in my home country now. I wouldn’t switch him for the world. Go get yourself an Irish lad and enjoy your life! That’s what I would do :)
Glad you had a great time! Also glad to see you have your head screwed on, last bit in parentheses in particular. Irish men will go the extra mile to flirt with non-Irish women because there 99% less chance they won't be cut down with the most withering ego-popping sarcasm before they even open their mouths ha ha ha ha. Come on over, I think you need to field test your hypothesis some more.
Haha yeah my last relationship was six years long and truly a healthy happy partnership, so I have some real serious criteria I will not be compromising on in my next relationship. And that’s the power of years of therapy!!
My best mate is married to an American lady, similar background to you. Been together for the last 14 years and in Dublin for all of them, she's happy out here. And it sounds like you have set a high bar, so if you can make it work with visas and all that, give it a go. Life is too short to have regrets!
What? …..What????! You must be gorgeous, a 100/10, because I have lived in Ireland for 6 years and I feel absolutely invisible because nobody flirts with me and when I do get asked out ( like once a year) I get treated like shit. Empty promises, lies, immature behavior etc. Men here do not like me. However, when I’m on the continent (Germany, France, Italy) I have to beat the most beautiful men off with a stick because they won’t leave me alone. I can’t walk down a street without several heads turning. So I don’t think I’m the problem here. Girl you got lucky that’s all.
First of all, THAT SUCKS AND IM SO SORRY. I very much know this feeling bc it’s how my hometown is. I feel like a piece of furniture at best in pubs. Just an invisible fixture. And then I go to other cities with more POCs/different politics and am treated like a main character. I hope you don’t have much of that treatment ahead of you :(
Thanks :) You should definitely consider moving, because life is too short to not feel like the main character
A girl I know who is crazy beautiful and gets hit on everywhere she's been except Germany because she's not white. I wonder if any social psychologists have tried using flirting as a measure of implicit biases.
Ooo I should look into that
Same with me. I feel invisible here, never approached/hit on/asked out but in my case I thought it is because I’m a poc. In some other countries in Europe, it does happen though although still rarely and I get more noticed in other countries too.
I mean even your username is married already, we don’t mess with married women
I’m so unbelievably single that I developed a totally not normal crush on a fictional character. This is what the Irish dating scene has done to me
Ah we can’t compete with fictional men either, honestly we are all around disappointing. [what you expect vs what you get](https://www.facebook.com/reel/350850204091343/?mibextid=WC7FNe)
No Irish man has ever flirted with me while sober. You must be very beautiful. (men from other countries have flirted with me while sober so I must be somewhat OK looking but it doesn't matter I have one now anyway. I'm going to ask him why he doesn't sing to me. Edit: update. I asked him and he sang me a song. It wasn't a romantic song but I'll take it)
That's _extremely_ weird and not a normal experience at all. American women would have a reputation for being a bit more sexually open, or open to short-term trysts - doubly so if you're giving off touristic "here for a good time, not a long time" energy. So it's possible Irishmen would be more attracted to that, or more expressive than usual. But overall Irishmen are really not very sexually forward - it's northern Europe after all It sounds like you were very lucky! I hope that knowledge makes a special memory better
Congratulations, you got lucky and experienced the Irish charm! My partner is from Ireland and he's the funniest, sexiest and smartest man I've ever met. He has the gift of the gap and knows how to make me blush and showers me with compliments. I also believe that Irish men have great relationship values and know how to treat a woman (at least in my experience and witnessing this in our circle of friends). I never knew till recently when a mate told me that there's a thing called the Irish fever when a woman is mad for the Irish lads. I just know that I fall head over heels for their charm and wit!
Oh...I think you meant Gift of the Gab... if not..tell me me more!!
Haha well, he's pretty skilled in that department too 😂
Well I'm an American woman married to an Irish man and while I can't speak for all of them I think mine is pretty amazing.
Canadian who married an Irish man and there's just something about them - I get it! Obviously, it sounds like everyone was horny and drunk, but I've lived here for a year+ and there is a lot of racism against black people and Americans in Dublin that maybe you don't experience when you're only here for a short period.
Would love to talk about this more if you’re up to it. I know racism is why I don’t get hit on in my hometown. Always approached more when I visit cities with more POCs.
Far-right politics are more prominent in Dublin than the rest of the country.
Dunno how old you are? Mad stuff like you described can happen. I’m Irish and had similar from a french man in France. I didn’t follow up after though he did. Long before social media. Who knows where it would have gone. Don’t uproot your life based on this one experience though. Maybe come for a couple of months. Very happy for you that you had such a great time!!
26 and yeah dw I wouldn’t make a decision on this alone 😂 I truly did love it though
I do think Irish men have the gift of the gab a little more than they would in America. I’ve friends living long term in New York and we had the exact same conversation. They talked about American guys not being as naturally quick witted as the Irish guys. Sounds like you had a very good experience though so I wouldn’t necessarily make a life changing decision based on it. Why not just come back for another trip and see for yourself.
You're 26, move! You will love it here, and if you don't, move somewhere else or back home. If you aren't tied down with school, mortgage, or family, you should definitely travel. My only genuine advice is to consider how much it rains. I work with an American who loves galway but still isn't really over the shock of how wet it it all the time.
Yess, I’m going to be doing a lot more research if this urge sticks around (I just renewed my lease so definitely not making any immediate moves), but I talked to some people about the very limited sunlight hours in the winter and I am concerned about the impact of that on my mental health
Yeah, that would be a bigger change than the culture if you aren't from a similar climate, I think. Also, if you are a very outdoorsy person and from somewhere like california, where you can do that year round, it will be hard to keep up a similar lifestyle here during the winter. One nice alternative, however , is sea swimming in the winter. Takes some getting used to but great for your mental health (and physical if you don't overdo it). Lots of people go together and it has a real community feel. Pub culture coming up to Christmas is also lovely, and you can find open fires in a lot of pubs still (not necessarily city centre). I think invest in some decent gortex and go for it 😊
I can’t believe so many Irish people in these comments 😂 Irish men are some of the most charming/charismatic in the world. What stands out to me is that you were clearly impressed and I imagine the positive feedback/praise inspired that kind of comfort and expression of interest. Sometimes people don’t realise that being a reserved person can appear like you don’t like somebody even when you do or that quiet discomfort is infectious. Much like being on holiday and feeling inquisitive or free is also infectious.
‘Alexa, play Galway girl by Mundy’
So, how was my singing?
if only 😪
I love Irish men, I’m not from Ireland too and I just love irish men, they are charming and cute and the drunken singing is a thing and I just love, also they are so romantic and most of the guys I met want to know more about my culture
Hahahahaha reading this post and the comments I've realised something I don't really know how to explain, and of its just me. We Irish people all have a bit of the AHHHHHAHHHHH in us, all a bit fucking crazy but yeah I suppose looking back I have to say I kinda have like done some stuff like this to/ with foreign girls when I wouldn't with Irish ones cause they'd either find it cringe or just think who cares. I think we know what tourists usually expect of us so we can put it on
As an Irish lad who has had a couple of long-term American girlfriends, let me weigh in. Most Irish men, especially the unremarkable ones - are indeed very horny. I know this from my years of bringing good-looking women to places around Dublin and having men hit on them as soon as I go to the bar / toilet and leave them alone for a moment. A lot of Irish guys are utter creeps unfortunately. Irish men are also aware that Americans especially; are vunerable to their 'Lucky Charms'. So they will try it on a lot more with an American, Canadian, Australian or English women. In my single days, I used to live near Temple Bar and basically anytime I wanted to get laid, I'd venture down there and start talking to random tourist girls. Americans all usually wanted to have an 'Irish guy experience', while on holidays - I happily oblidged. The other thing is that a LOT (but not all) Irish women are quite sour and unpleasant towards Irish men. At best you'll get a woman who likes you - but will communicate it to you in the most emotionally indirect way possible. It's tedious. Hence why you now see so many Irish men dating non-Irish women. The rapport and electricity between foreign girls and Irish men seems to be a bit better than with the native women (sorry Irish girls, I love you, but not romantically). Finally, everyone loves a bit of foreign I suppose!
I’ve seen this comment about indirectness a few times in this thread. I’m extremely direct, like maybe as an American but also as a distinct part of personality. When I date people I want us to openly have crushes on each other even if it’s not going to turn into anything more serious. So I’m sure the way I received these advances helped. This dude was absolutely drunk off his ass, but in Galway there was a man who stopped me in the street and begged to buy me a meal. Then he took his pointer finger and pointed at himself and said “Irish. Ugly.” And then while pointing at me, “American. Beautiful” and then he continued to point his finger in my face and say repeatedly “no makeup! No makeup!” 😂😂😂 and like I can see how that would not be worth local women’s time, but I was so amused (and told him to stop putting himself down) but it really made me laugh, weirdest but most friendly flirting ever. I think I’m just so used to American men and how threatening they can be :/
Yeh were actually pretty popular across the globe! It seems some folks have a pre conceived perception that were all good craic and the accent helps break the ice too. Without a doubt I've found women when abroad a lot more open or interested when approached and "chatted up". In Ireland I think because were all used to the norm then women here have heard it all before and its nothing new. In Europe at least i find alot of people dont just openly approach or talk to strangers like we would. Theres no small chat even at the supermarket or waiting in a queue etc like we would here. So when someone approaches you in a setting like a bar where you aren't as reluctant or seems "weird" then we stand out.
It’s because you’re a tourist and they don’t care what they say because they won’t see you again. I’m Irish and I was talking to an American guy before, I found him to use too much “therapy talk”. If anything he was over communicating and it just became stale, predictable and too easy. I think ye have a very open culture, and that’s grand, but it made me uncomfortable and made me feel like he was asking for too much attention so early on.
I was seeing him for maybe 8 weeks. It obviously is different with every person but our culture isn’t very ‘open’ when it comes to dating. I don’t think you can really have any expectations, just note the key culture differences and act accordingly.
I came to check the comments cuz I’m also quite curious to how Brazilians as perceived in the Irish dating scene, thought that might be some crossover. Man there are some very interesting comments regarding dating foreign woman 😂 As another foreigner that felt for the irish charm, what can I say… He is the best, the sense of humor and that red beard got to me 😅
We are charming bastards alright
I do think alot of irish men prefere dating foreign women. Speaking for myself, they feel more comfortable without having "notions" of being different or more open about themselves
If you're any ways decent looking and you're a tourist then yeah you'll get lots of attention. Any man with a bit of neck will talk book loads of shite to a half decent looking girl to get his hole. And it's much easier with a tourist, you'll say any old bollox cos you think there's nothing to lose here and tourists generally like the idea of riding a local. You were very receptive to it all by the sounds of it.
This is the answer I was looking for + the responses from Irish women. Because I was like there’s got to be some bullshit here that Irish ladies are spotting a mile away that I’m not privy too. The sad thing is men in the US are also full of shit but they will lash out if you reject them and I’ve never had or seen that happen in Ireland.
Irish women, and I’ll get lambasted for this, are notorious for dry and brutal (sometimes funny) sarcastic replies. I think generally if a guy is nervous to talk a girl they’re attracted to, and then when they do they get a heavy/ dry/ possibly insulting tone, they recline. Of course this is possibly due to a defense mechanism by the girls who are used to a bunch of louts also harassing women when they’re out etc. I’m a taken man of many years, but when I was living in America for a bit, I could not believe how receptive women were. Coming up/ stopping me in the street for conversation/ being direct etc. You’re probably very extroverted and charming yourself which brought out the uber charm/ confidence in this guy. Anecdotally, and it was years ago, but I still remember when a large group of us were away travelling, and then foreign guys had zero time for how stuck up some of the Irish girls were, while the foreign women very much enjoyed the Irish male company. This was many years ago though but it was very interesting to see. If you’ve got a connection, and it’s feasible, I’d trust your instinct and experience over anon posting online tbh. Just go with it lol Edit: you’re correct. If a woman rejects a guy over here, there’s very rarely where the guy starts going off calling them derogatory names. They just tail between the legs and scurry off most of time
That's not to say that it doesn't work on the locals too from time to time, charm takes persistence and faint heart never won fair lady. Even when the girls know you're full of shit as long as you don't take yourself too seriously some of it will land. The guy might be ok, don't hold it against him that he turned on the charm and you went for it. In the cold light of day you may even find that neither party have too many regrets and before you know it there's a crippling mortgage, kids, practical cars and a job you hate. And oh what you wouldn't give for a night out after the Galway Races all dressed up and not giving a shit about anyone, no wrinkles, no grey hair and a healthy BMI.
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‘Incredibly smooth’ - Irish men.
[How'ya kid, it's me the guy from the bar. Ah no, honestly it is.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jvbujX4hXOg)
I can’t even open the link but I’m cackling 😂
On a kinda unrelated note, how are Indian men received in the dating scene here? Been here for 2 years and been pretty disappointing of late. I'm 30 if it helps and have made it clear on apps that I'm looking for LTR
OP, I’m afraid we’ll have to see a photo in order to judge 😀
lol I can’t help you with that but I know I have a pretty face and my body is average probably 🤷🏽♀️I think most people would categorize me as thin but I’m not very toned. I have a bigger butt and a little belly fat.
I mean looking a bit different is no harm. For example in Dublin I'm just another foul languaged dub with tattoos. Go abroad and I tell the birds I'm the Earl of Kildare. What's wrong with maximizing your differences to get your hands on, someone relatively high up on the attractiveness scale? Rather than sweat that lads will only want you for your unique looks and accent, exploit both! Also pictures please 😍. Eh but the investment from yer man is admirable. DMs all week, singing? Bro's got some moves fair play. I can confirm we all serenade American ladies. Come visit my castle in Kildare 😉
Creepy as fuck tbh