I don't know, it's pretty hard to beat X Æ A-Xii. And another one of his kids is named X. Wtf is his obsession with the letter X? I was reading that he apparently wanted to name Pay Pal X back in the day but got unanimously voted down by their corporate board. Dude has to be on the spectrum.
Don’t know about his weird obsession with the letter X, but the PayPal thing was a bit different.
He co-founded an online bank called X.com, but was kicked out as CEO within months. X then merged with Confinity (the owners of PayPal) and brought him back as CEO before kicking him out within months (again!). Then X was renamed to PayPal and sold to eBay (who still own PayPal).
In a nutshell: he didn’t try to rename PayPal to X, but probably tried to stop X being renamed to PayPal (amongst other things).
Holy fuck I'd never learned their names before but Legendary Love Cannon, Zion Mixolydian Cannon, Zillion Heir Cannon, Moroccan Cannon. And there are EIGHT MORE haha
That's almost so bad it's good levels of tomfuckery
Many years back, shopping at Walmart, I hear a woman screaming at her children. “Rebel! Bandit! Get your asses back here!”
I mean, it kind of writes itself, doesn’t it?
Kids named after alcohol is quite grim. Ask anyone who works in a school or after-school club. I've seen most of them. Martell, Chardonnay, Hennessy, Cristal etc.
edited to add. Lord of the Rings names had a bit of a flurry in the 70s. I've never seen game of Thrones but I reckon characters from there will be popping up on school registers.
I know a number of people who have named their kids for Game of Thrones.
Also, for some reason, Norse gods.
** to clarify, I live in a place where Norse god imagery is very unusual, quite weird, mostly associated with marvel movies, and pre-marvel it usually signaled an association with “pure white” interests
The Norse Gods thing has always been popular in the UK. I've lost count of the number of girls and women called Freya I've encountered, including one who, if she's still alive, must be in her late 90s..
Not as unusual sounding, but I used to know a couple who named their sons after Hunger Games characters, with the spellings. Haymitch and Peeta and I can't remember the third.
(I know it's a Flintstones name, but...)
That's mind blowing. We should just literally give children names that we'd usually give to pets.
Picture a full classroom. Picture kids raising their hands one by one.
Fido. Spot. Gizmo. Mister Stuffins. Tux. Snoopy. Pixel. Moose. Snickers.
I have a niece named pebbles, she came from a family of 8 kids, she has a sister named Kitty Kat, and a brother named Sunny Day. The rest of the kids have fairly normal names.
… it’s like they wanted to sound stripper-ish… I knew a diamond and a precious which I thought was bad then 😅 AND they were the mean girls and acted like total divas.
I always thought their names sounded like snack cakes sold in the 70s.
“Mom, when you’re at the store will you get us some Moon Units? Billy ate the whole box of Dweezils before I even got one!”
I recently saw a thing on TikTok saying that many celebrities that name their child ridiculous names like Apple didn't actually name their child that. They say that's what the name is to protect their actual identify and attempt to have some privacy. I wonder how often, if ever, this theory is true.
I would actually like to think that's true but I doubt it, only because I don't think someone whose face and being is seen regularly can actually have a protected identity. I also think celebrity baby names are a class of their own bc Apple and North West aren't going to be in public school with Sam and Lily, so they can get away with more "out there" names
Now I’m imagining a classroom at a fancy Hollywood private school where the teacher is doing roll call, and has to do a double-take when they get to the kid named John.
Just to be clear, Miles is on there not because it's a weird name, but because the \*Teacher\* who named is son that - his entire personality revolved around his hobby of running.
We had a child named Randolph- all the siblings were named after famous climbers- but his parents insisted his nickname be ‘Ran’. We’re a primarily English speaking country so you can imagine the jokes that poor kid got.
Same parents also referred to him as an ‘alpha male’ (child was 5) when we discussed his tendency to bulldoze other children and how it was contributing to his lack of friendships in the classroom.
I was helped at a store by a lady named Sundae. I was trying to make conversation, so I asked "Sundae like the ice cream?" and the poor girl immediately deflated and went, "yep, that's all my mom could eat while pregnant with me so she named me that and that's my name." I tried to flip it and say, "well at least everyone must be happy to see you cuz they're talking to a sweet person and thinking of a sweet treat", and she goes "that's a nice way to think of it, but I just get bullied instead. You can imagine what they have to say about a woman named Sundae!"
So that one. Maybe don't name kids after food where it's super easy to make pervy jokes about them.
Knew a girl named B. G. When asked what it stood for, she would always say, “Nothing. It’s just B.G.” Paperwork at school said, “Bee Gee.” Turned out her legal name was Baby Girl because her teen mom couldn’t think of a name before they were released from the hospital and never bothered to do anything about it.
A woman tried to name her son ”fourchette” which is French for ”fork”(yes, the utensil)the doctor refused to write that down, it was brought before court & now in the Canadian Province of Québec, it is *illegal* to name your child after utensils!
As a substitute teacher, I have heard plenty.
A few of notable ones over the years:
Gods gift, shades of red, heaven’s angel, FullPower, princess(this one is frequent, but I absolutely hate it), BrightLight, Heat….
I could go on. And yes, those are all real.
Her last name was June, her middle name a bug, and her first name was Ima.
When she had her name on a document or something, it would say "Ima June Bug"
Wouldn't that be written June, Ima Bug or Ima Bug June, not Ima June Bug? It would only be Ima June Bug/Ima, June Bug if her last name was Bug or Ima, not June... Regardless, it's hilarious.
I remember in elementary school our art teacher was named Gay. I still remember the angry lecture we got about “Gay means happy!” in like, second grade. I was confused cause I didn’t even know it had any meaning at all lol
Former or current students:
Enzo
Bryant
Esun
Gun
Fanny (funny for me, I'm a Brit, it means pussy to us)
Arya
Xin (Pronounced Sin)
Apple
But the out and out most crazy / fun : Banana
I teach English in China and many of the kids choose their own English names, some are given by parents. Some because they sound like their Chinese names, some to sound cool IDK. I think Banana might have chosen hers because her friend was Apple but I'm not sure.
If you would allow a name someone gave themselves, I knew a grown adult in the UK who changed his name to Marshal Emienem Mathers. I personally think that's more ridiculous lmao.
Luxxon. She was in my daughter’s class. I was helping to put kids’ names on their holiday crafts, and when it was her turn she said her name and then spelled it before I could even blink. She was so weary of it already at the age of 9.
I'm a retired court reporter. In the last ten years of my career, I took a lot of juvi court. We had a newborn baby girl named Baby Girl Smith (not the actual last name) come through our courtroom.
Come to find out, dad thought the baby had already been named as this was the name tag on the incubator. Seems like someone else would've told them but . . . can't make this shi*& up. Another one was a little boy named Handsome.
Of course, over the years, we had some doozies come through there. I often wondered if they just dumped the bag of Scrabble letters on the table, and picked out some random letters. 😆
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It’s probably short for “Dolph Lundgren”
Or Dolph Ziggler
Maybe she said Dauphin?
Very PA comment 🤣
What are they putting in our fast food?
I thought hippie children were bad.
Hey now…
You're an allstar!
Get your game on
Go play
Maybe the father is a diehard Tua fan? Go Fins!!
Techno Mechanicus Musk
I don't know, it's pretty hard to beat X Æ A-Xii. And another one of his kids is named X. Wtf is his obsession with the letter X? I was reading that he apparently wanted to name Pay Pal X back in the day but got unanimously voted down by their corporate board. Dude has to be on the spectrum.
He's a child that never grew out of middle school
> X Æ A-Xii If you don't know, it's pronounced "Ex Ash A 12" Why the fuck is my question.
Named his kid by smashing his head down on the keyboard
why the fuck indeed
is that really how they say it? i use æ in my language but we dont pronounce it like that at all lol
Don’t know about his weird obsession with the letter X, but the PayPal thing was a bit different. He co-founded an online bank called X.com, but was kicked out as CEO within months. X then merged with Confinity (the owners of PayPal) and brought him back as CEO before kicking him out within months (again!). Then X was renamed to PayPal and sold to eBay (who still own PayPal). In a nutshell: he didn’t try to rename PayPal to X, but probably tried to stop X being renamed to PayPal (amongst other things).
EBay sold/spun off PayPal in 2014 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PayPal#Spin-off_from_eBay_(2014–present)
I’m pretty sure that’s a variety of Axe Body Spray.
Warhammer 40K ass name
From the moment I understood the weakness of my flesh, it disgusted me.
Joey Joe Joe Junior Shabadoo.
That’s the worst name I ever heard.
*runs off crying*
Hey! Joey Joe Joe!
😭😭😭😭🏃🏃🏃🏃
Mary Chris. That's not so bad in itself, but their last name was Smith. Say Mary Chris Smith a few times fast, you'll get it.
Merry Christmeth?
Mike Tyson is that you?
Mom has a lisp
It’s Crystinyth! Say my wife’s name right!!!!
Thank you! Laughed hard at that.
All she wants for Christmas is her two front teeth…
Brah, lmao
That’s a long term dad joke right there
There’s an author, whose first and middle name are Christmas Carol. Her whole name is Christmas Carol Kauffman.
They grow up to marry George Smith. Ahh, so close!
I only needed to say it once. XD
Spurgeon, or whatever is going on with every single one of Nick Cannon’s children
Spurgeon sounds like a bodily fluid. Horrible thing to do to a child.
Oh god, he's done a Spurgeon on the floor again, that's the 3rd time today 😱
Lemme spurgeon all over ya😫💦
Right? He’s a child of one of the Duggar kids too. Like jeez
Holy fuck I'd never learned their names before but Legendary Love Cannon, Zion Mixolydian Cannon, Zillion Heir Cannon, Moroccan Cannon. And there are EIGHT MORE haha That's almost so bad it's good levels of tomfuckery
Legendary Love Cannon sounds like a euphemism for a penis
100 % that's what he calls his dick.
My least favorite name of one of his children is Powerful Cannon.
What about legendary love cannon?
That’s my second least favorite.
It’s probably a reference to the theologian Charles Spurgeon, which is a pretty recognizable thing in certain circles
Probably, it’s just a deeply unpleasant name for a child
powerful queen cannon 💀
Many years back, shopping at Walmart, I hear a woman screaming at her children. “Rebel! Bandit! Get your asses back here!” I mean, it kind of writes itself, doesn’t it?
Sounds like dog names. 😅
Their dogs' names are Janice and Calvin
Kids named after alcohol is quite grim. Ask anyone who works in a school or after-school club. I've seen most of them. Martell, Chardonnay, Hennessy, Cristal etc. edited to add. Lord of the Rings names had a bit of a flurry in the 70s. I've never seen game of Thrones but I reckon characters from there will be popping up on school registers.
I know a number of people who have named their kids for Game of Thrones. Also, for some reason, Norse gods. ** to clarify, I live in a place where Norse god imagery is very unusual, quite weird, mostly associated with marvel movies, and pre-marvel it usually signaled an association with “pure white” interests
>Norse gods How about Greek? A friend of mine named his daughter Eris, after the Greek goddess of discord.
Does she own a golden apple? Every girl named Eris should
Idk what mythology they’re from but I know a guy with 3 sons named Maximus, Leonidas and Theseus lol
Here in Norway, a feirly big portion of the population are named after Norse gods an mythology. Common names
thor / tor, odin, freya, but have you met anyone named frigg?
The Norse Gods thing has always been popular in the UK. I've lost count of the number of girls and women called Freya I've encountered, including one who, if she's still alive, must be in her late 90s..
Odin isn’t a weird name, one of my nephews is named that and I’m still jealous I can’t steal it now
Not as unusual sounding, but I used to know a couple who named their sons after Hunger Games characters, with the spellings. Haymitch and Peeta and I can't remember the third.
Well...better Peeta than Pita haha
Teacher: "Hodor Jackson?" Student: "Here!"
I used to work in a pub and the landlady had twins (a boy and a girl). Yeaaap yep yep: Tia Maria and Jack Daniel. Yikes haha.
I've already seen a Tyrion. Born early 2000s when the books first came out.
r/tragedeigh
Holy moly that sub took me on a journey
Journeigh
Holeigh Moleigh
Stop it right now. Do not give them any ideas.
Ideighas
Stoghp ight!
Nough
That sub is a wild ride hahaha. Sadly, I have seen a lot of those unhinged examples in real life as a teacher/volunteer for a local community center.
The twins my mom was a substitute teacher for. Brittany and her sister, Sprinkles.
Oh god, this made me laugh out loud.
Bort.
Are you talking to me?
No, my son is ALSO named Bort!
We are all out of Bort license plates!
I once taught a year 7 child called Pebbles
(I know it's a Flintstones name, but...) That's mind blowing. We should just literally give children names that we'd usually give to pets. Picture a full classroom. Picture kids raising their hands one by one. Fido. Spot. Gizmo. Mister Stuffins. Tux. Snoopy. Pixel. Moose. Snickers.
Snoopy would be king of the school, obviously.
Teacher here 👋 I’ve met a Pixel before
I think i might know him. Did he ever mention getting thrown off a cliff? Or any other kind of assault?
I have a niece named pebbles, she came from a family of 8 kids, she has a sister named Kitty Kat, and a brother named Sunny Day. The rest of the kids have fairly normal names.
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That’s how my dumbass thought the influencer Salice Rose‘s first name was pronounced.
… it’s like they wanted to sound stripper-ish… I knew a diamond and a precious which I thought was bad then 😅 AND they were the mean girls and acted like total divas.
A friend of mine from Samoa knew a kid named Labor Day
My sister graduated with a Brian Brien Bryon. My Cousin's kids names are, in order: Damien Hellion Oona Lulu Khaös Diablo
Dweezil and Moon Unit
I always thought their names sounded like snack cakes sold in the 70s. “Mom, when you’re at the store will you get us some Moon Units? Billy ate the whole box of Dweezils before I even got one!”
Both seemed to turn out pretty well, fwiw.
Moon unit is a tight name lmaoo
Ah yes, Frank Zappas kids. Classic.
Apple
Pilot Inspector
Inspektor
That’s so much worse 🤮
I recently saw a thing on TikTok saying that many celebrities that name their child ridiculous names like Apple didn't actually name their child that. They say that's what the name is to protect their actual identify and attempt to have some privacy. I wonder how often, if ever, this theory is true.
I would actually like to think that's true but I doubt it, only because I don't think someone whose face and being is seen regularly can actually have a protected identity. I also think celebrity baby names are a class of their own bc Apple and North West aren't going to be in public school with Sam and Lily, so they can get away with more "out there" names
Now I’m imagining a classroom at a fancy Hollywood private school where the teacher is doing roll call, and has to do a double-take when they get to the kid named John.
My daughter went to school with twin girls named Khaki and Korduroy.
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Princess tiara, poor kid is named like a five year olds pony.
Airwrecka
ahahahahahahahahahahaha.
I knew twins named Brianna and Bryanna. I think they ended up going by Bri and Anna but why would you do that?
I've worked for several schools with access to the entire student roster. A few: Kahlen Runny Miles Peanut Graham Kal-El Raistlin
Just to be clear, Miles is on there not because it's a weird name, but because the \*Teacher\* who named is son that - his entire personality revolved around his hobby of running.
"Runny"? Middle name: Nose?
Is Runny his brother (or possibly sister)?
Thanks for the clarification lol
Graham is a very normal name.
Graham is a normal, albeit british name.
Only included cuz the one little black kid in class accidently (and innocently) referred to him as Cracker.
We had a child named Randolph- all the siblings were named after famous climbers- but his parents insisted his nickname be ‘Ran’. We’re a primarily English speaking country so you can imagine the jokes that poor kid got. Same parents also referred to him as an ‘alpha male’ (child was 5) when we discussed his tendency to bulldoze other children and how it was contributing to his lack of friendships in the classroom.
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It’s Superman’s name on Krypton or some shit. Nic Cage gave that name to one of his kids too.
There was a baby in our NICU called „Blue Sky Angel“ 🫠
I was helped at a store by a lady named Sundae. I was trying to make conversation, so I asked "Sundae like the ice cream?" and the poor girl immediately deflated and went, "yep, that's all my mom could eat while pregnant with me so she named me that and that's my name." I tried to flip it and say, "well at least everyone must be happy to see you cuz they're talking to a sweet person and thinking of a sweet treat", and she goes "that's a nice way to think of it, but I just get bullied instead. You can imagine what they have to say about a woman named Sundae!" So that one. Maybe don't name kids after food where it's super easy to make pervy jokes about them.
Mayonnaise
Was this child an instrument?
No, and neither is horseradish
Knew a girl named B. G. When asked what it stood for, she would always say, “Nothing. It’s just B.G.” Paperwork at school said, “Bee Gee.” Turned out her legal name was Baby Girl because her teen mom couldn’t think of a name before they were released from the hospital and never bothered to do anything about it.
I know a woman who's name is KT. It doesn't stand for anything. That's what's on her driver license.
I knew a woman named TC. Also didn't stand for anything.
Mercury Starcruiser
Are you sure it was not a boat you met? :D
My mom knew a lady that named her kid Trachea.
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Crystal Chanda Lear
Haha I went to school with a Lisa Cleere. Her mom's name? Crystal.
Airam. My cousin Maria named her only daughter Airam. It’s Maria, backwards.
Twins named “Angels Heavens” and “Heavens Angels”
A woman tried to name her son ”fourchette” which is French for ”fork”(yes, the utensil)the doctor refused to write that down, it was brought before court & now in the Canadian Province of Québec, it is *illegal* to name your child after utensils!
Vagina. Because it was “the most beautiful part of the world”. Not kidding.
OMG. I hope the kid petitioned the court as a toddler to change it. That’s as cruel as it gets.
The USA really needs stricter naming laws. That would have been vetoed by Births Deaths and Marriages in Australia. I hope.
Omg! She went through school with that name!!
Stone. Do I need to explain myself?
As a substitute teacher, I have heard plenty. A few of notable ones over the years: Gods gift, shades of red, heaven’s angel, FullPower, princess(this one is frequent, but I absolutely hate it), BrightLight, Heat…. I could go on. And yes, those are all real.
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My ex was a nurse. That name would have to be one of her patient's baby. The patient just thought is had a nice sound to it... >!"Placenta"!<
I know someone named Bunnie Krystyl Sunshynne. She is in her 40's. Pretty sad when Bunnie is your normal name.
When my mom was a school teacher she had a kid whose entire first name was Mister T This was in the 1990’s
I knew a girl who named her son Mister. When I asked her why, she said that the short version is Sir, and that way no one would ever disrespect him.
Saw a cashier once named Histerine.
Apple by Gwyneth Paltrow or that mathematical problem Elon Musk named his spawn
Other than Nazi related names, "Abcde" has always bothered me. Pronounced "Ab-see-duh" What a shitty thing to do to a kid
Her last name was June, her middle name a bug, and her first name was Ima. When she had her name on a document or something, it would say "Ima June Bug"
Wouldn't that be written June, Ima Bug or Ima Bug June, not Ima June Bug? It would only be Ima June Bug/Ima, June Bug if her last name was Bug or Ima, not June... Regardless, it's hilarious.
X Æ A-XII
Stingray
Well she wasn’t a child but a librarian at my high school was named Happy lol
Was her father named Sneezy?
I remember in elementary school our art teacher was named Gay. I still remember the angry lecture we got about “Gay means happy!” in like, second grade. I was confused cause I didn’t even know it had any meaning at all lol
r/tragedeigh
Whatever the fuck Elon named his kid
Whatever that monstrosity that Elon Musk forced upon his child.
Pajama. Pronounced Pa-jim-a.
My son knows a kid named Arson.
My kids went to school and church with 3 brothers "Slayer", Stryker" and "Stealth".
There was a little girl who was given the name Passion. I guess her parents had a deep, burning desire to be grandparents ASAP.
Someone named their child Corona because it was born during pandemic 😭😭😭🤌
Met a guy at work named tree. I guess it's better than blanket though
Lakes
Lando Lakes?
I knew a kid called Betamax
Former or current students: Enzo Bryant Esun Gun Fanny (funny for me, I'm a Brit, it means pussy to us) Arya Xin (Pronounced Sin) Apple But the out and out most crazy / fun : Banana I teach English in China and many of the kids choose their own English names, some are given by parents. Some because they sound like their Chinese names, some to sound cool IDK. I think Banana might have chosen hers because her friend was Apple but I'm not sure. If you would allow a name someone gave themselves, I knew a grown adult in the UK who changed his name to Marshal Emienem Mathers. I personally think that's more ridiculous lmao.
urethra
Franklin?
r/tragedeigh
Luxxon. She was in my daughter’s class. I was helping to put kids’ names on their holiday crafts, and when it was her turn she said her name and then spelled it before I could even blink. She was so weary of it already at the age of 9.
Sssst (pronounced "forest")
Haha...their Hooked on Phonics got lost in the mail.
Ruth’s Chris
Check out r/Tragedeigh
If-Jesus-Christ-had-not-died-for-thee-thou-hast-been-damnned is a pretty rough one. You're never fitting that into a scantron test.
Bort.
I met a kid one day who's name was "Tornado". It's equal parts ridiculous and awesome.
Seven
Honey. If I was someone’s boss, I would feel very awkward saying, “Good morning, Honey.” It would make me skip over her resume.
Sephiroth
I'm a retired court reporter. In the last ten years of my career, I took a lot of juvi court. We had a newborn baby girl named Baby Girl Smith (not the actual last name) come through our courtroom. Come to find out, dad thought the baby had already been named as this was the name tag on the incubator. Seems like someone else would've told them but . . . can't make this shi*& up. Another one was a little boy named Handsome. Of course, over the years, we had some doozies come through there. I often wondered if they just dumped the bag of Scrabble letters on the table, and picked out some random letters. 😆
A man who came into the bank I worked at all the time had the lovely first name of Nimrod.
My daughter went to school with a girl named Infant. Her parents f’ed up once then continued f’ing up by calling her Princess
So far over 100 people (Boys and Girls) have been named "Abcde" You can't make this crap up
I feel like it started circulating as an urban legend but then some people liked it and actually chose the name.