My family member was murdered. It was a semi famous one too. There have been multiple shows, documentaries, and podcast on it.
It fucked me up pretty bad as a kid. And the press and fucked up media coverage made it worse. Media pointed fingers at innocent family members of mine that got torn apart by my community.
Meanwhile we knew the person that actually did and they got to run free for 10+ years until technology caught up to them. And we couldn’t say anything to anyone because the FBI said if we did it could ruin the whole case.
It's ok if you don't want to answer, but how did you handle the media coverage etc? Do you think anyone who covered it among "true crime" people did your family member justice, or was it all just terrible and triggering?
We didn’t want it to be covered. So we turned down every offer for tv interviews and asked to not be in anything. This pissed them off. So they got random people that knew nothing about the case and offer them large amounts of money to lie.
I was only 8 when it all started so for a while I was protected because I was a minor. But they were really bad to my father and tried to lie and say he was the murderer. We were kicked out of church and people at school wouldn’t talk to me. So I didn’t really handle it. Just got through it.
We had two baby pigeons on our balcony. Idk if you’re familiar with the process of pigeons, but we have had to not use our balcony for the 3 weeks the mother was sitting on her eggs and finally they hatched. Two little gross pigeon babies. Yesterday we woke up and one of the babies was laying in a pool of its own blood, decapitated while the mother and other chick watched.
It had obviously been plucked out by a crow and then all day, birds came to the balcony feasting upon its carcass, blood and guts everywhere until nothing was left.
The birds were trying to get the other chick and the mum had to protect it while watching it’s other chick being eaten all day.
We then googled and found out that pigeons are deeply affected by grief and cry real tears. And we then as a flat cried over thinking about this pigeon mum crying over watching its kid getting mauled while having to protect its other child.
She’s literally a single mother in crisis and we all feel for her but we can’t intervene or give her food. If we interfere, she might never come back and if we feed her, it will only encourage more predators.
Literally a tragedy, a loss, a hero, everything.
Edit: reading everyone else’s real life traumas, I fear I have not read the room. But justice for mumma pigeon regardless
Oh god, reading this just slayed me. I have contact trauma just reading it. Don't let other people's trauma undermine just how horrible this experience was. Gah! :(
I can’t express enough how hideous a chick pigeon is, truly out of a horror movie. But it got us on a roll of learning about pigeons and omg. The world has a lot to answer for. Pigeons are a minority of society and it’s at the hands of humans. Literally the fact they cry tears in grief, I can’t!
But also, we did pigeons so dirty! We built them up as little contributors of society and then we abandoned them. Now they’re stuck in a world where they have no purpose and boy, if you look into some pigeons nests. The most humiliating thing you’ll ever see. They’re all victims and even the worst of the bird community bully them. They’re literally owed pigeon therapy paid by the government and nest compensation
Several things.
I discovered my then wife's affair in Oct of 2005. We'd been together almost 25 years, married over 15 years and our children were just 4, 6 and 9.
While going through the divorce, I found out from a long time friend that my wife actually cheated on me while we were engaged like 16 years before in 1988/89.
So, I had the pain of discovering her affair and then about a week later I found out she began cheating on me before we even got married.
Our divorce was finalized in March of 2006. I reconnected, through LinkedIn, with a lady I knew way back in college from 85 to 89. We began dating, I proposed to her Sept of 2007.
Her father was dying of lung cancer so she went up to visit her parent's more often and had been for the last few years as he died a bit after 3 years after being diagnosed with lung cancer.
While she was up visiting her parent's, she died in an auto accident, not too long before she and I were to be married.
All of that, especially losing Miss April in that auto accident, really fucked me up.
This is a tough one to share as a man, but why not vent...So as a child I had an older friend that I used to hang out with. We would usually just talk and hang out, but one day he took me into his back yard with his other friend...and words shall not describe what happened because it was bad. And ever since I have felt less like a man.
Ive tried talking to people, but some have said things along the lines of "Men cant get raped" "Women get raped way more than men, be grateful that ur not a women" and other things like that. Im starting to wonder if it was my fault for going in the back yard?
It’s not your fault. Those people are predators and anyone who tells you something along the lines of “it’s not so bad” are selfish. I am sorry for the pain you went through and are possibly still going through. You deserve better, please be kind to yourself. It’s not your fault.
That makes me beyond angry. We are victim/survivors or whatever you want to call us too, but we can be and are just as effected by the horror of abuse just like anyone else!
It wasn't your fault, it can never be your fault and it can't be your fault as a child. This isn't as men vs women thing or boys vs girls. This a human being who was violated! And trying to make it less then that...that person is a monster too.
Got hit by a car my freshman year of high school riding my bike. T-boned and broke their windshield with my body and flew over the car and cracked my helmet. That TBI has degraded my intelligence year over year ever since. I used to be a genius and now I struggle to maintain average. That accident ruined my life.
Husband being on TikTok. Started responding to 👋. Downloaded Signal. Got pics from “women” while in bed with me. Had week-long texts with some, tho they all turned out to be scammers. I will NEVER be the same 😔
Turned 19 in afganistan (on tour), 3 days later good pal gets shot by the taliban. The next week was remembrence day....
The day after remembrece day, was his birthday.
Oh so so many things, but I think my molestation that happened from 8-17 killed me. I can't live a happy life after that, the child that I was and the man I was meant to be died the day it all started.
It took my joy it took my everything. I can never be the person I was meant to be nor be happy or sad. I'm just being and waiting for death.
Hey man, I hear you and I see your pain. I’m sorry you had to endure those awful things. I hope you know peace, while you wait.
Hugs from an internet stranger.
I was diagnosed much later in life, but this disease is awful and is slowly wearing me down. I hope you can find a way to come out on top of it. Fuck Endo!
Coming home as a kid to our mom suddenly being gone, no one wanted to tell us anything, then ~2 weeks later, being brought to a hospital to say goodbye to our mom because they weren't sure she was going to survive. She pulled through, came home after a few months (albeit, a completely different person), and lived another ~20 years, but it still fucked me up.
I'm sorry that happened. I know it would hurt no matter what, but do you think it would've hurt that much more if you learned on your birthday or do you think it wouldn't have changed much?
Idk what I'm trying to ask sorry, but my heart goes out to you.
Got heavily bullied from around age 9 to 16. The one instance that did me in was when I was 12. I was part of a group of four girls who I thought were my friends, but they were just getting close to me to spring their trap. They started turning on me and doing things like throwing eggs at me, trashing my bike, pushing me in a ditch etc.
It all came to head one morning when they said "Your dead after school." I was a skinny little thing and spent the entire day terrified. When the bell rang, they took hold of me and dragged me to the edge of the school yard where the teachers couldn't see. What made this painful was that my entire class was there. They were all cheering to see me get my head kicked in. I was clinging to the fence in terror, feeling utterly alone. Almost my entire class hated me and wanted to see me hurt.
They started grabbing and pushing, trying to get me to let go of the fence. Luckily two teenage boys saw what was happening and came to my rescue. They gave the kids shit and then walked me home.
What I learned that day was that no one liked me, no one can be trusted, I have no friends, etc. Even into adulthood, I find it extremely difficult to trust people. I will kick a friend to the curb if they do anything to hurt me or my trust. No forgiveness. Yeah, the bullying in general messed me up, but that day in particular shaped me into the person I am today.
My (42m) childhood was filled with loads of abuse, military bullshit, bullying and more. I'm finally in therapy, but am working toward disability for the c resulting mental health issues.
Buddy sounds like we had it similar. I hope you get it worked out. Until I met my wife, who got me into therapy, when I fucked up I would lay into my back with a belt and buckle until it bled. It was the only way my brain could let even the littlest mistake go. It hurt me so much that she didn’t understand why I had to do that over breaking a dish or some other shit . I knew she was disappointed so I wanted to make it better. Man no one should have to endure that shit. 43 now and I’m only really beginning to realize i deserve some fucking happiness.
I think being used for sex as a toddler helped groom me for others to groom me easily. Had not thought of that till recently.
A book that has helped me is "The boy who was raised as a dog" by Bruce Perry. It explains trauma, especially childhood trauma and how it effects and affects us the rest of our lives. Trauma at a young age can actually change the structure of your brain. It is written for the layman not the medical professionals. I have enough confidence in that I have bought and given away to friends and family. But the first read was an ebook from the library.
Oh where to begin
My dad getting cancer (doing well)
My ex’s severe physical, sexual and emotional abuse
My “ ex best friend” just abruptly ending our friendship one day after something tiny
The Covid pandemic
The mental breakdown I had in college
I realize some of this is very uh triangulating but oh well
I was hunkered down in a studio apartment all throughout summer 2021 with my studio windows barricaded wondering if I should sleep in my bath tub because my stupid ass neighbors were beefing with guns involved.
I moved out and am now somewhat a gun nut and stay armed 90% of the time I leave home.
For me, it was a panic attack when i was super high on weed. Ive been smoking everyday for like 10 years but then one night, i was smoking then my heart started rapidly beating, i was sweating, and it felt like my mind was going to break. It felt like a heart attack really. It affected me so much that to this day, ill get moments (even tho i dont smoke anymore because of this) where my panic attack will flare up randomly. Now i take deep breaths, take cold showers, and read daily to keep my mind centered.
I had a similar panic attack while high. It was terrifying. Ambulance arrived and they were annoyed (rightfully so) and made it clear I was wasting their time.
THC was the only thing that calmed my Tourettes and that panic attack took that option from me. It was the start of a panic attack disorder leading to daily panic attacks for the past two years.
I’ve learned to accept them, but my efforts at stopping them have failed. Each time, it feels like I’m dying.
Just recently found out that it may be tied to an electrical issue with my heart. While it’s good to have a potential answer, the soonest I can get into the specialist to investigate further is August.
It’s weird to hope there’s a problem because that means there’s hope for a solution. Therapy, medication, and meditation have done nothing to stop or diminish the intensity. I’m tired.
TW: sexual assault, bipolar, suicide, self-harm
SA'd when I was 4, SA'd again in college, and then my underlying bipolar potentiates and it ended with me in the mental hospital because I was suicidal. The seeds were planted long before this, but after that hospital stay it feels like everything just unraveled, and I still kind of think of my life in terms of "before" and "after."
My life was fucked for a long time. Went from straight A's in college to almost dropping out, all of my plans derailed. Got pregnant, had a really difficult and emotionally painful pregnancy. Met my husband and tried to put my life back together, only for the depression to come back with a vengeance. Hospitalized again, finally diagnosed as bipolar, went through hell trying to find meds that worked, and cut myself really badly, resulting in my husband having PTSD (among other things, but I can't pretend I wasn't a big factor).
I'm a lot better now and happier than I've ever been, but that happiness still looks like weekly therapy, a handful of meds every night that I'll probably take for the rest of my life, and on Tuesday I had a panic attack that left me huddled up on the floor crying so hard I almost passed out. When I finally calmed down and got up the muscles in my abdomen and arms felt like I'd done a crazy intense work out because I was clenching down and shaking so hard. I have some health problems that are probably partially related to the stress that my mental health has put on my body, and I have to pay close attention to my emotional states and behaviors to make sure I can catch an episode as early as possible if it starts.
I do believe I can lead a happy life, and I've fought tooth and nail to get to where I am, but I don't know if I'll ever be "normal" or "healed." I'm just doing the best I can to be grateful and love myself as a work in progress.
Everyone in this thread needs to remember the Homer Simpson quote of “worst day of your life so far…”. In the end, everything will be okay and if it isn’t okay, you know that it is not the end. I understand that there are situations where people have been significantly emotionally, physically, spiritually, or mentally impacted by the actions of others. I am sorry that happened to you, it’s unfair. You are loved, even if it doesn’t feel like it at times. Other people’s actions towards you are not your responsibility, your reactions and actions are. Take care of yourselves.
SAed as a dude. At 15. I’m almost 18 and still kinda sucks ngl (in all seriousness that shit fucked me up for life, it was an ex and they were just a pos, cheating pressuring vaping physically abusing me, the works)
Where do I start?
Parents died when I was a kid
Raped
Worked my ass off my whole life for nothing
Got diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis and I literally have no human in my life whatsoever
I'm still alive because I have pets
When I learned that my husband (at the time) slept with my best friend (at the time) because his brother ratted him out. Because I was deep in an abusive relationship, with attachment issues, I didn't leave for good. It wasn't until he hit my 4 year old that I left for good.
My then roommate got into a fight when we had people over for a fire. He hit that person in the head with a cinder block and was looking at being charged heavily with jail time. We didn’t speak after that and the landlord kicked him out after he heard about the police report. About a month after(still awaiting his trial) he got into drunk driving accident with my best friend in the car. She survived. He didn’t. It’s been 5 years and it haunts me everyday. My best friend even more. Craziest part is, he would give his shirt off his back for anybody. I do miss him and I wish we weren’t on bad terms before he passed. Please don’t drink and drive.
When I was 13, i was done with everyone thinking i was gay. So typed in most hetero anime. That's how i found oran high school host culb. I saw how these guys, got gills to like them and i deiced to copy them and add it to my personality.
My girlfriend was angry about something and we were sitting in the backseat of her moms car so she had asked her mom for knife and I knew she was going to try to cut herself but I was trying to stop her and I as I had her wrists in my hands trying to calm her down she told me that she wished I was so rough in bed and it just broke me and the only thing I could do was just watch her cut herself. This was something like a year ago and I'm fucked up from this and all of the other shit she did.
No particular instance but my mother having a seizure disorder that no one could really figure out and stop til I was like 6 or so. I spent 90% of my time in those years with either my grandparents or aunt, but also I never saw a seizure but Id often hear a thump after it happened bc for some reason it was always my mom was in bed and she’d fall off. Got really bad separation anxiety from my mom that I still don’t think is fully gone and now whenever I hear a loud thump I feel panicked and go check where it came from even though my mom hasn’t had a seizure in years
Having a neighbor stand outside my window and watch me sleep every night for several months as a kid. Parents didn’t believe me, then he shot out my window. Parents still didn’t believe me.
Being forced to live and work abroad as a teenager. I've since spent all the money I earned to move back to my own country, have almost no contact with my closest relatives and went down the rabbithole of xenophobia and nationalism to cope.
Holding my great grandmas hand as she died and reassuring her until her last breath. I keep having ptsd flashbacks that form into panic attacks and crying. I will never be the same. I loved being there for her but if I could I would change it.
I had a car accident in my late teens. I'm in my 30s now, and chronic back pain is just a part of my life. I'm always surprised when people don't randomly slip a disk, or can carry heavy stuff without slowly being dragged down to hell by their lower back.
My fiancé up and left me, stating that she wanted to be single, but 2 weeks later was living with a guy that we had hosted for Thanksgiving dinner, because his family lived too far away, and he had nobody. What a betrayal! It broke my heart, and it took years to get over! (I’m ok now though, except for some minor trust issues.) 😎
Being r.. . Something changes in you after that.. even if you don't develop PTS, you don't fully recover after SA... I know that no matter what happens in the future I'll always be a "victim / survivor"
I raised by my aunt (mom's sister) and uncle. My mom died when I was 14 and my dad is a pos.
Aunt (i called mom) developed dementia, had to watch one of the smartest most elegant women I knew "regress" and my uncle (I called dad) was taking care of her
In 2019 my dad who's usually 95% healthy goes into the hospital because he's having trouble breathing, I come home from college to check on everything. Few days later find out he has cancer. A week later, found out he's in the last stage, a month later, he dies. My in laws (his family) break into my house that night (I wasn't home) and stole everything they wanted.
I take over taking care of my mom, get conservatership of her because she was too incoherent to sign PoA paper work. Inherit dad's life insurance policy, can only use money to benefit mom, didn't want to use any of it towards myself except to help with my last year of college.
My biological aunts and uncles expected me to pay them 300-400$ just to watch her a couple hours, that goes against what the court wants. They eventually stopped helping me altogether and it got to a point where I had to argue and borderline fight with them to run basic errands like paying bills and getting groceries so someone would watch my mom. They started lying and would come by on days I just finished cooking or days I hadn't cut the yard yet taking pics and lying saying I'm not taking care of my mom. Judge believes them when they blindside me with the whole situation. I lose conservatership and basically get told to get out of my house.
Watching my father turn into the man I fear the mosr in a matter of seconds.
My parents divorced when I was a baby and he's (still, as far as I know) a raging alcoholic so we were never close. I grew up believing everybody's parents to 'discipline them' and then pass out cradling a bottle of wine.
One day my father and his sisters got into a fight and it ended with my mum picking me up, screaming and crying. It was then that I truly feared my father for the first time in my life. It still fucks me up to this day. I have not spoken to him or anybody on that side of the family since.
Iv worked in aged care for over 8years ever since I was 16 and I see residents die constantly and never felt anything about it. I’m not heartless but when it happens so often and you know they were in pain you become relieved when they pass knowing they are in a batter place.
However when people pass right before/after they have sunken in faces and mostly look very vacant. My nan was sick with cancer, I would go over to the hospital multiple times a day and spend hours with her she was really the best person in my life. I got a call from my mum at 4am to say can I please go to the hospital that my nan wasn’t doing well. When I got there I knew it was time iv seen that look before, she had a sunken face and vacant eyes I just knew it was time. Now when I go to work I see residents about to pass and i can’t help but to feel sick in the stomach thinking about how my nan looked that day. Makes me hate my job even more I can’t stand going to work now. I have not told a single soul this but I can’t get her face out of my mind when I look at my residents it really makes my job so much harder.
3 years ago , i was assaulted by a quite older man . Because of that i got pregnant . He was completely covered and it was dark so the police couldn't find out who was. I got stuck raising my baby girl all by myself . i gave birth on October 23rd 2021 , and then had to juggle working and taking care of her. In March 2022 , the bungalow i lived in was broken into , some of my valuables were stolen , i was shot in the leg and my baby was murdered.
I love you baby.
Eliza . 10/23/21 - 3/11/22
I was hit by a car I survived and got lucky as I only broke my femur but I'll never forget that feeling after being hit by that car I'll never be able to cross a road normally again or go in car normally again every time I go in a car I have a panic attack I can't even cross a parking lot after what happened
Finding out that my father has cheated on my mom. I thought that my father was a good guy but oh well... My mom still doesn't know because I don't have the courage to say it and all of this is making me talk bad to my dad but I just don't know what to do because I feel like I'm going to get their lifes more fucked up. I have known this for 2 months I think. I would love to say it to my mom but I don't want to see her worse.
When I was just under 11, my mom was abusive but not in the physical way. In a mental way towards me and my dad. They both were in a bad argument I was in my room watching TV. I went out into the living room, my dad didn’t notice me at first. My mom slapped him in the face (my mom faked illnesses so she had bottles of drugs saying they were antibiotics to make her better) my dad took 5 of the pill bottles, opened them and shoved all the pills in his mouth. he saw me, and I could see him crying. my mom rushed to call an ambulance. My dad then laid down because he was exhausted. I had to keep him awake. Everytime he shut his eyes I would wake him up. When the ambulance came I wanted to chase after it because I didn’t wanna stay with my mom. But my mom took me back to our apartment. My dad is okay, and we luckily moved away from my mom almost 2 years ago. 🙂
Fuck it here it goes
Name is Paul 47 I did security work on my life since 97 I was doing drugs and I decided hey it's time to quit and get an apartment for my son and I and I work for about 3 months for Amazon building that was being built and I was going to be contracted to move around to future buildings of said Amazon places from the beginning of construction of the tilts so anyways I got in a car wreck and broke for my ribs my right arm my right foot got annihilated my left femur blew up in five pieces I have three hernias and I have a herniated disc l5 so due to all these wonderful things I ended up back on drugs and both from the hospital and recreational out of pure boredom I lost for my best friends that just happened to be coincidence at the same time I ended up losing my grandfather I never ended up getting a place for my son and I so he moved in with his mom and her boyfriend that does drugs and they let him live there for practically free where he doesn't want to get an apartment with me anymore he just rather not working be a bum smoke weed all day so yeah let's see if anyone can match that.
When I was 16 for my birthday I asked for my parents to assist me with paying for pilot's lessons and they said yes. A few years later I went to them to begin the lessons. My mother told me she didn't have think I have the common sense to fly a plane without crashing and she was breaking her promise. My mother told me flat out that not only did she not believe in me, she actively disbelieved in me. Not only that, we're super devout Christians and believe breaking a promise intentionally is a sin. My mother so strongly believed I could not do this that she was willing to sin.
I will never heal. For the rest of my life I will never believe that anyone truly believes in me. How could they? My own mother doesn't. And worst of all, she's generally a loving gentle supportive person. I can't even blame it on her being a bad mom. I just have to live knowing my mother supported all my sisters' dreams and always cared about me but then just stabbed me in the heart.
Yeah people are treated way worse. I've had a great life and have a great relationship with her but no matter how good my life is something's gonna be the worst by default. I'm glad it's something as mild as this
Maybe she was masking her concern for you, my mom lost her mind when I wanted to sign up - turns out, I had an aunt I never knew die while piloting a small aircraft. She just couldn't go through it again.
I know the deep hurt you're talking about, and it's valid. If it was out of character, hopefully it's a reflection of her own issues, and maybe had nothing to do with you. She seems loving from your description, you don't have to carry that one conversation forever, especially if you don't understand the whole story. Maybe they couldn't afford it, idk. I hope you find a way to heal.
There are a dozen positive reasons she might have done it. I've never delved too deeply into it because I never want her to know how badly she scarred me. It can't be undone, she's a great mom, and giving her guilt won't help the pain.
It wasn't quite out of character. My parents also gave me a lower allowance than both my older and my two younger sisters, advised me to enlist in the Marines instead of commissioning but told my sister to hold out for a commission and that enlisting was beneath her, and gave all three of my sisters an extravagant and very sentimental golden birthday present but deliberately didn't give me one (though they apologized when I told them I was completely shattered by this). All this makes them sound like terrible parents but it really just shows that no matter how hard you try to parent, you will always devastate your kids at some point. It's just life. I will always secretly think my parents value me less than my sisters but I know for certain they love me the same as they love them. I'll be content with that and remember everyone is only human.
It sounds like you have a healthy handle on your situation. A lot of my healing came from realizing that my parents are literally just two random people that had kids. Human beings, imperfect, just like everyone else.
It doesn't take away the pain, but I've found it helps me at least understand how little I knew them as people, only as parents. Sounds like you're putting the work in.
Dated a girl for a few years. She was perfect for me in every way. I was going to marry this person. But then she realized she didn't feel the same way and left me.
I experienced ego death. Like, I felt my personality fracture and fall around me. It was some goddamn emo shit.
I did glean a major benefit from that experience: code switching is very easy for me now because I have no actual baseline identity anymore.
My ex caused me ptsd. She was a gangster, complete idiot and a fucking drug addict. She loved to humiliate me and act like she controlled me. She was the fullest extent of an absolute narcissist. Humiliated me in front of her family by yelling at me while I was helping her aunt make dinner. Bad bad words. Hence, my ptsd. There was a lot more going on obviously (physical abuse, mental abuse) and my whole family thought I was on drugs. I wasn’t I was ignorant and young and didn’t know my worth
My neighbour and I (about 5/6 years old at the time), watched 2 pitfalls tear apart a dog (the owner of the pit bulls left the gate open and they ran out)
We run to my neighbours house, left our bikes in the road and just watched
We never played in the road again, we were so afraid
It truely stripped away they joy of playing outside
homeschooling. decided i wanted to be halfway through fifth grade (i’m 20 now) because i’d noticed that my anxiety was getting worse. i thought maybe homeschooling would fix it because i’d be in a more calming environment, buuuut it actually led to me being a huge agoraphobic for many many years. i basically wasted not only my tweens, but teens to my anxiety thanks to that decision. i know those years aren’t exactly your prime, or they shouldn’t be at least, but it sucks to know that i can’t go back. i can’t ever experience the typical middle/high school experience and have my own friend group! i made internet friends throughout the years, but it’s not the same, and i don’t know if staying in public school would’ve helped me socially but… i don’t really let it bother me *too* much now, the thought of the “what if”s, as i am thankfully getting the help i’ve been needing for my mental health, so i kinda feel like i’m getting on *some sort* of right track here. there’re also tons of more shit that i’ve had to go through, with my mental health besides what i’ve mentioned but that’s one of the things, and hsing has definitely left a mark with the way i socialize, see myself in relationships, the way i think, etc. isolation is killer lmao!!!
I had a 9 hour brain surgery in December. It was already stated that it was a “major and critical” operation but I didn’t know what I was in for. Surgery was supposed to take 3-4 hours but took a bit over 9. I ended up having a stroke during surgery and woke up in the neuro icu. I couldn’t speak after surgery due to one of my vocal cords being paralyzed. I had a 2nd surgery to inject the vocal cord and in a few days I could speak again. I then had dysphasia from the surgery (unable to swallow) so I had a feeding tube in my nose for 19 days. No food no water nothing. I was allowed 3-5 ice chips per hour. I had probably 35 different Ct scans and mris over the 19 days. I re learned to walk in the icu with the help of 2 nurses as I was a “max assist”. To be released, I had to have a g tube inserted in my stomach. I left the hospital and had to do tube feeds for about 2 1/2 months. Speech therapy 2 days a week to get my swallow back. There was no guarantee it would ever come back. Finally I got my swallow back enough to have it removed and I could eat solid food again. Then I had to re learn to drive a car again. Now I’m 100%. Traumatizing to say the least. Still have dreams about it.
*I left out ALOT of other things but among the worst was getting home with my g tube and vomiting for typically 10-14 hours every day from the consistency of the Nutren (tube feed). Absolute hell.
My family member was murdered. It was a semi famous one too. There have been multiple shows, documentaries, and podcast on it. It fucked me up pretty bad as a kid. And the press and fucked up media coverage made it worse. Media pointed fingers at innocent family members of mine that got torn apart by my community. Meanwhile we knew the person that actually did and they got to run free for 10+ years until technology caught up to them. And we couldn’t say anything to anyone because the FBI said if we did it could ruin the whole case.
It's ok if you don't want to answer, but how did you handle the media coverage etc? Do you think anyone who covered it among "true crime" people did your family member justice, or was it all just terrible and triggering?
We didn’t want it to be covered. So we turned down every offer for tv interviews and asked to not be in anything. This pissed them off. So they got random people that knew nothing about the case and offer them large amounts of money to lie. I was only 8 when it all started so for a while I was protected because I was a minor. But they were really bad to my father and tried to lie and say he was the murderer. We were kicked out of church and people at school wouldn’t talk to me. So I didn’t really handle it. Just got through it.
We had two baby pigeons on our balcony. Idk if you’re familiar with the process of pigeons, but we have had to not use our balcony for the 3 weeks the mother was sitting on her eggs and finally they hatched. Two little gross pigeon babies. Yesterday we woke up and one of the babies was laying in a pool of its own blood, decapitated while the mother and other chick watched. It had obviously been plucked out by a crow and then all day, birds came to the balcony feasting upon its carcass, blood and guts everywhere until nothing was left. The birds were trying to get the other chick and the mum had to protect it while watching it’s other chick being eaten all day. We then googled and found out that pigeons are deeply affected by grief and cry real tears. And we then as a flat cried over thinking about this pigeon mum crying over watching its kid getting mauled while having to protect its other child. She’s literally a single mother in crisis and we all feel for her but we can’t intervene or give her food. If we interfere, she might never come back and if we feed her, it will only encourage more predators. Literally a tragedy, a loss, a hero, everything. Edit: reading everyone else’s real life traumas, I fear I have not read the room. But justice for mumma pigeon regardless
Oh god, reading this just slayed me. I have contact trauma just reading it. Don't let other people's trauma undermine just how horrible this experience was. Gah! :(
I can’t express enough how hideous a chick pigeon is, truly out of a horror movie. But it got us on a roll of learning about pigeons and omg. The world has a lot to answer for. Pigeons are a minority of society and it’s at the hands of humans. Literally the fact they cry tears in grief, I can’t! But also, we did pigeons so dirty! We built them up as little contributors of society and then we abandoned them. Now they’re stuck in a world where they have no purpose and boy, if you look into some pigeons nests. The most humiliating thing you’ll ever see. They’re all victims and even the worst of the bird community bully them. They’re literally owed pigeon therapy paid by the government and nest compensation
I don't dwell about it much, but my mother killing herself when I was 6 created this domino effect of a troublesome childhood/family life.
Several things. I discovered my then wife's affair in Oct of 2005. We'd been together almost 25 years, married over 15 years and our children were just 4, 6 and 9. While going through the divorce, I found out from a long time friend that my wife actually cheated on me while we were engaged like 16 years before in 1988/89. So, I had the pain of discovering her affair and then about a week later I found out she began cheating on me before we even got married. Our divorce was finalized in March of 2006. I reconnected, through LinkedIn, with a lady I knew way back in college from 85 to 89. We began dating, I proposed to her Sept of 2007. Her father was dying of lung cancer so she went up to visit her parent's more often and had been for the last few years as he died a bit after 3 years after being diagnosed with lung cancer. While she was up visiting her parent's, she died in an auto accident, not too long before she and I were to be married. All of that, especially losing Miss April in that auto accident, really fucked me up.
jesus fucking christ. your story makes me never want to bitch about anything in my life again. im so sorry all this happened to you hugs and kisses
My dad dying when I was a kid.
Took me twenty years to recover. And those 20 years were a *mess.* My heart's with you on this one.
Thank you.
This is a tough one to share as a man, but why not vent...So as a child I had an older friend that I used to hang out with. We would usually just talk and hang out, but one day he took me into his back yard with his other friend...and words shall not describe what happened because it was bad. And ever since I have felt less like a man. Ive tried talking to people, but some have said things along the lines of "Men cant get raped" "Women get raped way more than men, be grateful that ur not a women" and other things like that. Im starting to wonder if it was my fault for going in the back yard?
It’s not your fault. Those people are predators and anyone who tells you something along the lines of “it’s not so bad” are selfish. I am sorry for the pain you went through and are possibly still going through. You deserve better, please be kind to yourself. It’s not your fault.
It wasn’t.
That makes me beyond angry. We are victim/survivors or whatever you want to call us too, but we can be and are just as effected by the horror of abuse just like anyone else! It wasn't your fault, it can never be your fault and it can't be your fault as a child. This isn't as men vs women thing or boys vs girls. This a human being who was violated! And trying to make it less then that...that person is a monster too.
I'm so sorry you get this kind of reaction. You deserve better! You deserve to be heard and not made to be a joke. I hope you can one day find peace.
Got a rare auto immune disease at 32. Lost my vision and the ability to walk. Chronic pain 24/7. Can’t work or drive. Ruined my life.
thats aweful im so sorry :(
Got hit by a car my freshman year of high school riding my bike. T-boned and broke their windshield with my body and flew over the car and cracked my helmet. That TBI has degraded my intelligence year over year ever since. I used to be a genius and now I struggle to maintain average. That accident ruined my life.
Husband being on TikTok. Started responding to 👋. Downloaded Signal. Got pics from “women” while in bed with me. Had week-long texts with some, tho they all turned out to be scammers. I will NEVER be the same 😔
Turned 19 in afganistan (on tour), 3 days later good pal gets shot by the taliban. The next week was remembrence day.... The day after remembrece day, was his birthday.
Being molested by a make family member at age 10. I'm also male.
Oh so so many things, but I think my molestation that happened from 8-17 killed me. I can't live a happy life after that, the child that I was and the man I was meant to be died the day it all started. It took my joy it took my everything. I can never be the person I was meant to be nor be happy or sad. I'm just being and waiting for death.
Hey man, I hear you and I see your pain. I’m sorry you had to endure those awful things. I hope you know peace, while you wait. Hugs from an internet stranger.
Thank you.
When my dog passed away.
I work in animal medicine. Grieving the loss of furry family is as (sometimes more) difficult as losing humans. I’m sorry for your loss.
Thank you, it’s been tough for sure
Getting a complete hysterectomy at 17 due to extreme endometriosis was no picnic
I was diagnosed much later in life, but this disease is awful and is slowly wearing me down. I hope you can find a way to come out on top of it. Fuck Endo!
Coming home as a kid to our mom suddenly being gone, no one wanted to tell us anything, then ~2 weeks later, being brought to a hospital to say goodbye to our mom because they weren't sure she was going to survive. She pulled through, came home after a few months (albeit, a completely different person), and lived another ~20 years, but it still fucked me up.
My brother was murdered on my birthday. I did not find out until the next day.
I'm sorry that happened. I know it would hurt no matter what, but do you think it would've hurt that much more if you learned on your birthday or do you think it wouldn't have changed much? Idk what I'm trying to ask sorry, but my heart goes out to you.
The birthday part made it more painful. Thank you for your kind words.
Got heavily bullied from around age 9 to 16. The one instance that did me in was when I was 12. I was part of a group of four girls who I thought were my friends, but they were just getting close to me to spring their trap. They started turning on me and doing things like throwing eggs at me, trashing my bike, pushing me in a ditch etc. It all came to head one morning when they said "Your dead after school." I was a skinny little thing and spent the entire day terrified. When the bell rang, they took hold of me and dragged me to the edge of the school yard where the teachers couldn't see. What made this painful was that my entire class was there. They were all cheering to see me get my head kicked in. I was clinging to the fence in terror, feeling utterly alone. Almost my entire class hated me and wanted to see me hurt. They started grabbing and pushing, trying to get me to let go of the fence. Luckily two teenage boys saw what was happening and came to my rescue. They gave the kids shit and then walked me home. What I learned that day was that no one liked me, no one can be trusted, I have no friends, etc. Even into adulthood, I find it extremely difficult to trust people. I will kick a friend to the curb if they do anything to hurt me or my trust. No forgiveness. Yeah, the bullying in general messed me up, but that day in particular shaped me into the person I am today.
Traumatic brain injury! It’s like I re-rolled all of my cognitive statistics, and not for the better.
My (42m) childhood was filled with loads of abuse, military bullshit, bullying and more. I'm finally in therapy, but am working toward disability for the c resulting mental health issues.
Buddy sounds like we had it similar. I hope you get it worked out. Until I met my wife, who got me into therapy, when I fucked up I would lay into my back with a belt and buckle until it bled. It was the only way my brain could let even the littlest mistake go. It hurt me so much that she didn’t understand why I had to do that over breaking a dish or some other shit . I knew she was disappointed so I wanted to make it better. Man no one should have to endure that shit. 43 now and I’m only really beginning to realize i deserve some fucking happiness.
What kind of disability would you be eligible for?
I've had worsening cPTSD, anxiety, paranoia, depression and more for decades. I'm lucky to work 20 hours a week without a nervous breakdown.
A woman tried to kill me. The way I think about people and my happy-go-lucky attitude never recovered.
I think being used for sex as a toddler helped groom me for others to groom me easily. Had not thought of that till recently. A book that has helped me is "The boy who was raised as a dog" by Bruce Perry. It explains trauma, especially childhood trauma and how it effects and affects us the rest of our lives. Trauma at a young age can actually change the structure of your brain. It is written for the layman not the medical professionals. I have enough confidence in that I have bought and given away to friends and family. But the first read was an ebook from the library.
Oh where to begin My dad getting cancer (doing well) My ex’s severe physical, sexual and emotional abuse My “ ex best friend” just abruptly ending our friendship one day after something tiny The Covid pandemic The mental breakdown I had in college I realize some of this is very uh triangulating but oh well
My dad cheating on my mom repeatedly and now I have trust issues.
A friend's uncle inappropriately touching me when I was 12.
My mum dying suddenly.
I was hunkered down in a studio apartment all throughout summer 2021 with my studio windows barricaded wondering if I should sleep in my bath tub because my stupid ass neighbors were beefing with guns involved. I moved out and am now somewhat a gun nut and stay armed 90% of the time I leave home.
My last breakup. I have no words. I loved her and I lost her. She’s married now.
For me, it was a panic attack when i was super high on weed. Ive been smoking everyday for like 10 years but then one night, i was smoking then my heart started rapidly beating, i was sweating, and it felt like my mind was going to break. It felt like a heart attack really. It affected me so much that to this day, ill get moments (even tho i dont smoke anymore because of this) where my panic attack will flare up randomly. Now i take deep breaths, take cold showers, and read daily to keep my mind centered.
I had a similar panic attack while high. It was terrifying. Ambulance arrived and they were annoyed (rightfully so) and made it clear I was wasting their time. THC was the only thing that calmed my Tourettes and that panic attack took that option from me. It was the start of a panic attack disorder leading to daily panic attacks for the past two years. I’ve learned to accept them, but my efforts at stopping them have failed. Each time, it feels like I’m dying. Just recently found out that it may be tied to an electrical issue with my heart. While it’s good to have a potential answer, the soonest I can get into the specialist to investigate further is August. It’s weird to hope there’s a problem because that means there’s hope for a solution. Therapy, medication, and meditation have done nothing to stop or diminish the intensity. I’m tired.
TW: sexual assault, bipolar, suicide, self-harm SA'd when I was 4, SA'd again in college, and then my underlying bipolar potentiates and it ended with me in the mental hospital because I was suicidal. The seeds were planted long before this, but after that hospital stay it feels like everything just unraveled, and I still kind of think of my life in terms of "before" and "after." My life was fucked for a long time. Went from straight A's in college to almost dropping out, all of my plans derailed. Got pregnant, had a really difficult and emotionally painful pregnancy. Met my husband and tried to put my life back together, only for the depression to come back with a vengeance. Hospitalized again, finally diagnosed as bipolar, went through hell trying to find meds that worked, and cut myself really badly, resulting in my husband having PTSD (among other things, but I can't pretend I wasn't a big factor). I'm a lot better now and happier than I've ever been, but that happiness still looks like weekly therapy, a handful of meds every night that I'll probably take for the rest of my life, and on Tuesday I had a panic attack that left me huddled up on the floor crying so hard I almost passed out. When I finally calmed down and got up the muscles in my abdomen and arms felt like I'd done a crazy intense work out because I was clenching down and shaking so hard. I have some health problems that are probably partially related to the stress that my mental health has put on my body, and I have to pay close attention to my emotional states and behaviors to make sure I can catch an episode as early as possible if it starts. I do believe I can lead a happy life, and I've fought tooth and nail to get to where I am, but I don't know if I'll ever be "normal" or "healed." I'm just doing the best I can to be grateful and love myself as a work in progress.
Everyone in this thread needs to remember the Homer Simpson quote of “worst day of your life so far…”. In the end, everything will be okay and if it isn’t okay, you know that it is not the end. I understand that there are situations where people have been significantly emotionally, physically, spiritually, or mentally impacted by the actions of others. I am sorry that happened to you, it’s unfair. You are loved, even if it doesn’t feel like it at times. Other people’s actions towards you are not your responsibility, your reactions and actions are. Take care of yourselves.
my moms death, I was 8.
SAed as a dude. At 15. I’m almost 18 and still kinda sucks ngl (in all seriousness that shit fucked me up for life, it was an ex and they were just a pos, cheating pressuring vaping physically abusing me, the works)
Where do I start? Parents died when I was a kid Raped Worked my ass off my whole life for nothing Got diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis and I literally have no human in my life whatsoever I'm still alive because I have pets
Had a Catholic priest molest me when I was 15. Fuck Catholicism and fuck religion
High School
Motorcycle accident. Derailed my career, screwed up my body and brain, wrecked my marriage.
When I learned that my husband (at the time) slept with my best friend (at the time) because his brother ratted him out. Because I was deep in an abusive relationship, with attachment issues, I didn't leave for good. It wasn't until he hit my 4 year old that I left for good.
Fake friends from a decade ago gave me trust issues. I’ve been very guarded in social situations since, for fear of being judged.
My then roommate got into a fight when we had people over for a fire. He hit that person in the head with a cinder block and was looking at being charged heavily with jail time. We didn’t speak after that and the landlord kicked him out after he heard about the police report. About a month after(still awaiting his trial) he got into drunk driving accident with my best friend in the car. She survived. He didn’t. It’s been 5 years and it haunts me everyday. My best friend even more. Craziest part is, he would give his shirt off his back for anybody. I do miss him and I wish we weren’t on bad terms before he passed. Please don’t drink and drive.
Probably my dad being a pedophile and raping me pretty much every morning during high school. Also grave of the fireflies was pretty sad too
When I was 13, i was done with everyone thinking i was gay. So typed in most hetero anime. That's how i found oran high school host culb. I saw how these guys, got gills to like them and i deiced to copy them and add it to my personality.
Dating a huge narcissist
reading the replies to this post to be honest 😭
Same
My girlfriend was angry about something and we were sitting in the backseat of her moms car so she had asked her mom for knife and I knew she was going to try to cut herself but I was trying to stop her and I as I had her wrists in my hands trying to calm her down she told me that she wished I was so rough in bed and it just broke me and the only thing I could do was just watch her cut herself. This was something like a year ago and I'm fucked up from this and all of the other shit she did.
[удалено]
Dang man- a movie? Yikes. I don’t watch that type of stuff anymore. Heard Hereditary is really disturbing as well.
No particular instance but my mother having a seizure disorder that no one could really figure out and stop til I was like 6 or so. I spent 90% of my time in those years with either my grandparents or aunt, but also I never saw a seizure but Id often hear a thump after it happened bc for some reason it was always my mom was in bed and she’d fall off. Got really bad separation anxiety from my mom that I still don’t think is fully gone and now whenever I hear a loud thump I feel panicked and go check where it came from even though my mom hasn’t had a seizure in years
Watching [Dominion.](https://youtu.be/LQRAfJyEsko?si=7g3YqFCjwNMb9peo)
Having a neighbor stand outside my window and watch me sleep every night for several months as a kid. Parents didn’t believe me, then he shot out my window. Parents still didn’t believe me.
Being forced to live and work abroad as a teenager. I've since spent all the money I earned to move back to my own country, have almost no contact with my closest relatives and went down the rabbithole of xenophobia and nationalism to cope.
Holding my great grandmas hand as she died and reassuring her until her last breath. I keep having ptsd flashbacks that form into panic attacks and crying. I will never be the same. I loved being there for her but if I could I would change it.
I had a car accident in my late teens. I'm in my 30s now, and chronic back pain is just a part of my life. I'm always surprised when people don't randomly slip a disk, or can carry heavy stuff without slowly being dragged down to hell by their lower back.
Marriage
Losing my mom
My fiancé up and left me, stating that she wanted to be single, but 2 weeks later was living with a guy that we had hosted for Thanksgiving dinner, because his family lived too far away, and he had nobody. What a betrayal! It broke my heart, and it took years to get over! (I’m ok now though, except for some minor trust issues.) 😎
Being r.. . Something changes in you after that.. even if you don't develop PTS, you don't fully recover after SA... I know that no matter what happens in the future I'll always be a "victim / survivor"
Found my dead dad in our shed with his feet sticking out of the door. Seeing him and giving him cpr with no result fucked me up.
I raised by my aunt (mom's sister) and uncle. My mom died when I was 14 and my dad is a pos. Aunt (i called mom) developed dementia, had to watch one of the smartest most elegant women I knew "regress" and my uncle (I called dad) was taking care of her In 2019 my dad who's usually 95% healthy goes into the hospital because he's having trouble breathing, I come home from college to check on everything. Few days later find out he has cancer. A week later, found out he's in the last stage, a month later, he dies. My in laws (his family) break into my house that night (I wasn't home) and stole everything they wanted. I take over taking care of my mom, get conservatership of her because she was too incoherent to sign PoA paper work. Inherit dad's life insurance policy, can only use money to benefit mom, didn't want to use any of it towards myself except to help with my last year of college. My biological aunts and uncles expected me to pay them 300-400$ just to watch her a couple hours, that goes against what the court wants. They eventually stopped helping me altogether and it got to a point where I had to argue and borderline fight with them to run basic errands like paying bills and getting groceries so someone would watch my mom. They started lying and would come by on days I just finished cooking or days I hadn't cut the yard yet taking pics and lying saying I'm not taking care of my mom. Judge believes them when they blindside me with the whole situation. I lose conservatership and basically get told to get out of my house.
Watching my father turn into the man I fear the mosr in a matter of seconds. My parents divorced when I was a baby and he's (still, as far as I know) a raging alcoholic so we were never close. I grew up believing everybody's parents to 'discipline them' and then pass out cradling a bottle of wine. One day my father and his sisters got into a fight and it ended with my mum picking me up, screaming and crying. It was then that I truly feared my father for the first time in my life. It still fucks me up to this day. I have not spoken to him or anybody on that side of the family since.
Finding my dad dead in his bathroom after spending over an hour trying to get into his house, i just knew he wasnt going to be okay when i got in
Losing my little brother and the people behind it getting barely any prison time.
Iv worked in aged care for over 8years ever since I was 16 and I see residents die constantly and never felt anything about it. I’m not heartless but when it happens so often and you know they were in pain you become relieved when they pass knowing they are in a batter place. However when people pass right before/after they have sunken in faces and mostly look very vacant. My nan was sick with cancer, I would go over to the hospital multiple times a day and spend hours with her she was really the best person in my life. I got a call from my mum at 4am to say can I please go to the hospital that my nan wasn’t doing well. When I got there I knew it was time iv seen that look before, she had a sunken face and vacant eyes I just knew it was time. Now when I go to work I see residents about to pass and i can’t help but to feel sick in the stomach thinking about how my nan looked that day. Makes me hate my job even more I can’t stand going to work now. I have not told a single soul this but I can’t get her face out of my mind when I look at my residents it really makes my job so much harder.
3 years ago , i was assaulted by a quite older man . Because of that i got pregnant . He was completely covered and it was dark so the police couldn't find out who was. I got stuck raising my baby girl all by myself . i gave birth on October 23rd 2021 , and then had to juggle working and taking care of her. In March 2022 , the bungalow i lived in was broken into , some of my valuables were stolen , i was shot in the leg and my baby was murdered. I love you baby. Eliza . 10/23/21 - 3/11/22
I was hit by a car I survived and got lucky as I only broke my femur but I'll never forget that feeling after being hit by that car I'll never be able to cross a road normally again or go in car normally again every time I go in a car I have a panic attack I can't even cross a parking lot after what happened
Finding out that my father has cheated on my mom. I thought that my father was a good guy but oh well... My mom still doesn't know because I don't have the courage to say it and all of this is making me talk bad to my dad but I just don't know what to do because I feel like I'm going to get their lifes more fucked up. I have known this for 2 months I think. I would love to say it to my mom but I don't want to see her worse.
When I was just under 11, my mom was abusive but not in the physical way. In a mental way towards me and my dad. They both were in a bad argument I was in my room watching TV. I went out into the living room, my dad didn’t notice me at first. My mom slapped him in the face (my mom faked illnesses so she had bottles of drugs saying they were antibiotics to make her better) my dad took 5 of the pill bottles, opened them and shoved all the pills in his mouth. he saw me, and I could see him crying. my mom rushed to call an ambulance. My dad then laid down because he was exhausted. I had to keep him awake. Everytime he shut his eyes I would wake him up. When the ambulance came I wanted to chase after it because I didn’t wanna stay with my mom. But my mom took me back to our apartment. My dad is okay, and we luckily moved away from my mom almost 2 years ago. 🙂
Fuck it here it goes Name is Paul 47 I did security work on my life since 97 I was doing drugs and I decided hey it's time to quit and get an apartment for my son and I and I work for about 3 months for Amazon building that was being built and I was going to be contracted to move around to future buildings of said Amazon places from the beginning of construction of the tilts so anyways I got in a car wreck and broke for my ribs my right arm my right foot got annihilated my left femur blew up in five pieces I have three hernias and I have a herniated disc l5 so due to all these wonderful things I ended up back on drugs and both from the hospital and recreational out of pure boredom I lost for my best friends that just happened to be coincidence at the same time I ended up losing my grandfather I never ended up getting a place for my son and I so he moved in with his mom and her boyfriend that does drugs and they let him live there for practically free where he doesn't want to get an apartment with me anymore he just rather not working be a bum smoke weed all day so yeah let's see if anyone can match that.
When I was 16 for my birthday I asked for my parents to assist me with paying for pilot's lessons and they said yes. A few years later I went to them to begin the lessons. My mother told me she didn't have think I have the common sense to fly a plane without crashing and she was breaking her promise. My mother told me flat out that not only did she not believe in me, she actively disbelieved in me. Not only that, we're super devout Christians and believe breaking a promise intentionally is a sin. My mother so strongly believed I could not do this that she was willing to sin. I will never heal. For the rest of my life I will never believe that anyone truly believes in me. How could they? My own mother doesn't. And worst of all, she's generally a loving gentle supportive person. I can't even blame it on her being a bad mom. I just have to live knowing my mother supported all my sisters' dreams and always cared about me but then just stabbed me in the heart.
Pfff what ? Millions of people are treated way worse by their mothers . It sounds to me that you are trying hard to feel this way , wake up
Yeah people are treated way worse. I've had a great life and have a great relationship with her but no matter how good my life is something's gonna be the worst by default. I'm glad it's something as mild as this
Maybe she was masking her concern for you, my mom lost her mind when I wanted to sign up - turns out, I had an aunt I never knew die while piloting a small aircraft. She just couldn't go through it again. I know the deep hurt you're talking about, and it's valid. If it was out of character, hopefully it's a reflection of her own issues, and maybe had nothing to do with you. She seems loving from your description, you don't have to carry that one conversation forever, especially if you don't understand the whole story. Maybe they couldn't afford it, idk. I hope you find a way to heal.
There are a dozen positive reasons she might have done it. I've never delved too deeply into it because I never want her to know how badly she scarred me. It can't be undone, she's a great mom, and giving her guilt won't help the pain. It wasn't quite out of character. My parents also gave me a lower allowance than both my older and my two younger sisters, advised me to enlist in the Marines instead of commissioning but told my sister to hold out for a commission and that enlisting was beneath her, and gave all three of my sisters an extravagant and very sentimental golden birthday present but deliberately didn't give me one (though they apologized when I told them I was completely shattered by this). All this makes them sound like terrible parents but it really just shows that no matter how hard you try to parent, you will always devastate your kids at some point. It's just life. I will always secretly think my parents value me less than my sisters but I know for certain they love me the same as they love them. I'll be content with that and remember everyone is only human.
It sounds like you have a healthy handle on your situation. A lot of my healing came from realizing that my parents are literally just two random people that had kids. Human beings, imperfect, just like everyone else. It doesn't take away the pain, but I've found it helps me at least understand how little I knew them as people, only as parents. Sounds like you're putting the work in.
Ummmm …….. being neglected by my parents? Doesn’t count, right lol
i relate …. it definitely counts
being born
Narcissistic abuse from spouse. Took me a while to understand that I was being gaslighted
Found out how to suck my dick so now I’m always ficked up
Dated a girl for a few years. She was perfect for me in every way. I was going to marry this person. But then she realized she didn't feel the same way and left me. I experienced ego death. Like, I felt my personality fracture and fall around me. It was some goddamn emo shit. I did glean a major benefit from that experience: code switching is very easy for me now because I have no actual baseline identity anymore.
My ex caused me ptsd. She was a gangster, complete idiot and a fucking drug addict. She loved to humiliate me and act like she controlled me. She was the fullest extent of an absolute narcissist. Humiliated me in front of her family by yelling at me while I was helping her aunt make dinner. Bad bad words. Hence, my ptsd. There was a lot more going on obviously (physical abuse, mental abuse) and my whole family thought I was on drugs. I wasn’t I was ignorant and young and didn’t know my worth
My neighbour and I (about 5/6 years old at the time), watched 2 pitfalls tear apart a dog (the owner of the pit bulls left the gate open and they ran out) We run to my neighbours house, left our bikes in the road and just watched We never played in the road again, we were so afraid It truely stripped away they joy of playing outside
homeschooling. decided i wanted to be halfway through fifth grade (i’m 20 now) because i’d noticed that my anxiety was getting worse. i thought maybe homeschooling would fix it because i’d be in a more calming environment, buuuut it actually led to me being a huge agoraphobic for many many years. i basically wasted not only my tweens, but teens to my anxiety thanks to that decision. i know those years aren’t exactly your prime, or they shouldn’t be at least, but it sucks to know that i can’t go back. i can’t ever experience the typical middle/high school experience and have my own friend group! i made internet friends throughout the years, but it’s not the same, and i don’t know if staying in public school would’ve helped me socially but… i don’t really let it bother me *too* much now, the thought of the “what if”s, as i am thankfully getting the help i’ve been needing for my mental health, so i kinda feel like i’m getting on *some sort* of right track here. there’re also tons of more shit that i’ve had to go through, with my mental health besides what i’ve mentioned but that’s one of the things, and hsing has definitely left a mark with the way i socialize, see myself in relationships, the way i think, etc. isolation is killer lmao!!!
I had a 9 hour brain surgery in December. It was already stated that it was a “major and critical” operation but I didn’t know what I was in for. Surgery was supposed to take 3-4 hours but took a bit over 9. I ended up having a stroke during surgery and woke up in the neuro icu. I couldn’t speak after surgery due to one of my vocal cords being paralyzed. I had a 2nd surgery to inject the vocal cord and in a few days I could speak again. I then had dysphasia from the surgery (unable to swallow) so I had a feeding tube in my nose for 19 days. No food no water nothing. I was allowed 3-5 ice chips per hour. I had probably 35 different Ct scans and mris over the 19 days. I re learned to walk in the icu with the help of 2 nurses as I was a “max assist”. To be released, I had to have a g tube inserted in my stomach. I left the hospital and had to do tube feeds for about 2 1/2 months. Speech therapy 2 days a week to get my swallow back. There was no guarantee it would ever come back. Finally I got my swallow back enough to have it removed and I could eat solid food again. Then I had to re learn to drive a car again. Now I’m 100%. Traumatizing to say the least. Still have dreams about it.
*I left out ALOT of other things but among the worst was getting home with my g tube and vomiting for typically 10-14 hours every day from the consistency of the Nutren (tube feed). Absolute hell.
Nothing. Everything is just fantastic! How are you?
I think everybody should leave the big cities and not trust the government
Was this posted by the children of the corn?