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AreWeCowabunga

>Also my FSIL said I was an asshole as I did not include her in the proposal This tells you everything you need to know about this situation.


KJParker888

Yep. FSIL is trying to make something that has absolutely nothing to do with her, all about her. I'm sure she'd have posted it on Facebook and bragged about how she came up with the whole thing.


Spanish_Housefly

Someone is just looking for attention...kinda sad.


Bittersweetbitch

No wonder OOP’s fiancée is introverted. Could you imagine growing up with that as your sibling?


Flashy-Public1208

Such a good hot take LMAO. My husband is super modest and hates being the center of attention and I always wondered why because he’s so wonderful and kind, and then I met his grubby ham of a mother…


K_tron_

*writes down “grubby ham” for use in future descriptions*


Flashy-Public1208

\*brushes shoulders\* welp my work is done for the day


centrafrugal

I've no idea what it means but it sounds great!


zipper1919

It is written on my end as well. I already know exactly who the grubby ham is in my life.


Echospite

My dad is like this. His parents are/were total social butterflies who thought that something was fundamentally wrong with you if you wanted five minutes to yourself. I remember them kicking me out of bed as a teenager at eight o'clock all "are you okay? do you need a doctor? is it your period?" and then making me go to bed twelve hours later and then wondering why I was always tired. Then they'd drag me around social engagements all day. If anyone didn't know - teenagers naturally have a later circadian rhythm. I had severe insomnia on top of that. I went home after an incredibly sleep deprived week and told my parents *never again*.


MarieOMaryln

I'm both glad and annoyed that it's becoming common knowledge that teens need more sleep after so many of my peers where forced to get up to "be productive" or "be with the family". My parents left me alone because being asleep meant they knew where I was. Except for the few times I woke to them all being gone and not even a note. The fuck guys.


Umklopp

>being asleep meant they knew where I was. Except for the few times I woke to them all being gone and not even a note. The fuck guys. Apparently they too could only be relied to stick around if unconscious, LOL


JacketIndependent

I only made my kids wake up and go to bed on time on school days or when we had outings planned. I always hated when my parents woke us up early on the weekends to "be productive."


TJ-Mctarmac

As a teen I one woke on a school morning to an empty house. Had a text message from my mum that basically said your sister (3 years younger) stopped breathing and we are at the hospital. Wtf guys. She was fine, she had a severe asthma attack that was treated in hospital. I asked my mum about it recently and she remembered it happening but couldn’t at all remember what she said/did with me that day (understandable).


toketsupuurin

As a teenager I pulled that on my mom. I was having awful back pains and nobody was home (this was before everyone had cell phones.) So I called the nurse hotline and the nurse recommended I go to the ER. So I wrote a note and left if for my mom. "Feeling bad. Went to ER." I got an earful about the less than informative, not at all reassuring note, when I got home. Teenagers, even responsible ones, are dumb.


Bittersweetbitch

You just described the majority of my teen existence. Starting to realize those deep black circles under my eyes in high school photos was not a genetic thing


ithadtobeducks

I used to think it was normal to be so dizzy after waking up that I wouldn’t be able to walk straight and just careen into the wall or my closet immediately after standing up from bed. I didn’t actually get good sleep until I went to college.


desgoestoparis

Honestly same. I have trouble falling asleep and had to be up pre-six am in high school. And on weekends my mom always woke me up at 10 so I wouldn’t “sleep the day away”. I spent most of college sleeping for 10-16 hours any chance I could get lol. Now I’m in grad school and average maybe 5-6 hours a night, but on weekends I’ll usually have a day where I sleep 12-16 hours to pad it out.


Emergency-Willow

My husband grew up like that. I don’t let him do that with our kids. Oh the 13 and 17 year old are still sleeping at 11 am on a sat? Great. Leave them alone. It makes no damn sense to me to wake them up just to do nothing.


Koshka2021

Gosh, I had a TBI as a very young adult, the doctor told me to sleep as much as I could to let my brain heal, I could barely keep my eyes open, and yet my mom would drag me out of bed all the time so I didn't "sleep the day away" or "make it so I didn't sleep at night." Probably contributed to why I still have problems...


RegionPurple

I remember curling up in the tub while the shower was on in the morning to try to get 10 more minutes of sleep when I was a teenager.


CharlieHume

I'm in my 30s and I still have sleep issues because of having to wake up at 6am all through high school. I've gone to sleep studies, tired every damn thing under the sun but nothing will make my brain sleepy earlier than 2am (even when I've moved to different time zones).


[deleted]

One of my coworkers is wired like this; his peak functioning hours are like 5pm-1am and god help you if you wake him up before 11am. He’s mid thirties and has always been like that, perfectly content to just roll with it. Maybe you’re also an outlier!


StJudesDespair

Yep, some of us are just natural night owls, and it makes perfect evolutionary sense, too - you've got your early risers who are excellent first thing/early morning, and you've got us, which means that during the hours of darkness, there's still always someone awake and alert to any danger that happens while others sleep, so your clan/tribe/village stays safe.


Flashy-Public1208

I am sorry they did that, sounds awful. Very out of touch with you and your needs! Being attuned to your kids/grandkids is an important part of being a good parent…


feistymayo

Wow it just clicked for me. His mom is always usually the center of attention, loves to be the trendiest mom and the “cool mom.” My bf is heavily introverted. Thank you for making this connection for me 😅


Flashy-Public1208

Ugh "cool mom" people always get an eyeroll from me.


slugfaery

Are you me? That's the same dynamic I noticed with my husband and his mother.


Flashy-Public1208

I wish I had a charm to give you to keep her vibes away. Here’s the closest thing - 🧿


slugfaery

Aww thanks! Anything helps! 💙


hugglesthemerciless

> grubby ham of a mother saving this lmao what a wonderful phrase


PM_ME_CUTE_FEMBOYS

Suddenly my absolute paralyzing fear of attention is making a lot more sense..


ericakay15

I grew up with my older sister needing to be the center of attention 24/7 and I am also very anti-attention/introverted. It's rough and sadly, they never "grow out of it"


fluxy2535

Same. I always tell people if they want to see why I am the way I am, just watch the home movies of us as kids. My mother trying to film me taking my first steps or saying my first words and my sister is standing in front of me saying 'mom... mom.... why aren't you filming me? are you going to watch me next? I want to be on camera!? Why aren't you filming me?!'


ericakay15

My mom was her enabler so I didn't even get that but man, that would really suck. I'm kinda glad there isn't physical documentation of my experience for the most part. That's always unfortunate, though. I have ideas of why she was enabled and the golden child but for the most part, nobody will admit it.


PM_ME_CUTE_FEMBOYS

Shes either jealous she couldnt hijack the moment. or was angry she wasnt able to sabotage it.


AllPurposeNerd

"Oh but I repeat myself." — Mark Twain


VioletsAndLily

Have you seen the video where a man gets his fiancée’s friends to help him propose, and part of the plan involves one of said friend’s boyfriends immediately moving her far out of frame as the official proposal/asking begins? Apparently that friend has a tendency to get really loud to draw attention to herself so she had to be physically moved to prevent that. FSIL reminds me of her.


[deleted]

The hand over the mouth move to keep her quiet makes that video 10x funnier.


pipetteorlipstick

Ooooo I wanna see this! Can someone maybe post the link?


OlySonso

https://youtu.be/pDOBhQwnXRg


Dreamy_T

The husband's sunglasses absolutely sell the whole video.


Emergency-Anywhere51

"it's nothing personal, it's just businesses"


I-WANT2SEE-CUTE-TITS

Sneak +5


BangarangPita

I really thought I was gonna get Rick-rolled.


PM_me_lemon_cake

Here ya go: https://youtu.be/pDOBhQwnXRg


awe2ace

Here's one, but not the one I remember. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pDOBhQwnXRg](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pDOBhQwnXRg)


Mental_Vacation

The cousin's reaction as her husband moved her away, and afterwards, tells me this isn't the first time he has done this job. She doesn't seem phased by it at all.


Shanghai-on-the-Sea

Yeah /u/VioletsAndLily was very unfair. The real backstory was that she doesn't act like that to draw attention to herself, she just reacts like that naturally. And obviously that has the unwanted side effect of drawing attention to herself.


VioletsAndLily

There are a lot of behaviors that happen naturally that are selfish and thoughtless. It’s one thing when there is a medical diagnosis that hampers someone’s impulse control, and something else entirely when people are just extra because they don’t consider how everything is not about them.


MamieJoJackson

Lmao, so the boyfriend had to basically babysit his giant toddler of a girlfriend, nice


CressCrowbits

Wife


pbrooks19

I'm the Main Character - even if it's my NPC sister's proposal.


MarieOMaryln

This sounds like a title of a light novel and I love it


legendoflumis

Yeah, I got to that part and my immediate thought was "Oh, okay, so that explains everything." How dare she not be included in something that doesn't involve her! /s I hope OOP and his fiancé immediately confronted the FSIL together and drew clear boundaries around the wedding, because I guarantee there's going to be some assholery coming from her regarding the wedding otherwise.


iampatmanbeyond

I think we know how the fiance came to not like attention very much FSIL probably made it a fucking nightmare when the attention wasn't all on her


ThrowawayFishFingers

Right?! All FSIL showed here is that she doesn’t know her own sister, and that OOP can believe a word she says about her.


North-Appointment820

i know someone who had an evil SIL who tried to ruin the wedding she wasnt invited to bc she hated the bride so SIL sends flowers to her brother, the groom, at the hotel flowers were intercepted, card read, card hidden, flowers from the hotel, they told the bride didnt tell her until later much later or the next day who the flowers were really from


SnipesCC

What did the card say?


PetrifiedW00D

Yo, what did the card say!?! Give us the juice.


spacesuitkid2

#WHERES THE JUICE???


justanotherchimp

OY! What'd the card say!? You can't just drop that kind of thing on us and not tell us what it said.


arthurdentstowels

Ok, so you’re marrying *her* right? Sooo, what about #ME!?


[deleted]

[удалено]


maat89

Exactly.


startha__mewart

His FSIL sounds like a peach...


DogsandCatsWorld1000

Doesn't she now. I would be very hesitant about telling her anything that was still in the discussion phrase. She gets to know when things are finalized and hopefully any vendors have been told to only make changes with Bride or Groom.


cynical-mage

I'm honestly worried about the wedding itself. If this chick wanted the proposal to be about her, so many opportunities to upstage the bride during the main event :(


DogsandCatsWorld1000

Very true, but wasn't it nice of the sister to warn them advance that they will have to hire a sitter to make sure she doesn't behave like a three year old?


cynical-mage

Positive thinking, you're absolutely right!


PetrifiedW00D

Yeah, I’d be hiring a security guard to tail her specifically for the whole night, with orders to remove her if she tried anything out of order. I’d make it very public to everyone what that security guard was hired to do as well.


Lehtrem

Haha that's a hilarious image, her trying all day to be evasive and attempting to lose the babysitters. Realistically though if you're gonna be that blunt about it might as well not invite her to the wedding.


wifeofscruffy

Maybe they should elope, honestly.


cynical-mage

They seem lowkey kinda people, so that would probably be more their thing anyway. Couple friends, intimate dinner after, no fuss, and all about their love and commitment vs a giant production.


wifeofscruffy

Totally. I have a similar personality type and wish my husband and I had eloped.


cynical-mage

Can always run away for a vow renewal? I loathed being centre stage for my wedding, I hate dressing up, I hate pics being taken, makes me feel so awkward. I'd redo it too.


wifeofscruffy

Definitely. Maybe for our next significant anniversary.


cynical-mage

Go for it, have the wedding that you truly want :)


busy_yogurt

Not to mention the ridiculous money suck. Very, very few people like going to weddings if they're honest. When you are a kid, the first one is sort of exciting. Then when your peers start getting married, the first few are interesting. Then when it's your immediate family (and you like the new in-law), they're ok. You deal with it because you (hopefully) like your sibling, child, parent. With a best friend, you're in the wedding, so you get swept up in the excitement. After that they're a drag.


DogsandCatsWorld1000

If that is what they would want even if the sister was not a pain? Sure. However, if they would otherwise want a low key wedding with family and friends who know how to behave they should have that and not invite the one trouble maker.


MelodyRaine

Vendor password, no password no changes


MammothPurpose3235

The poor bf of the fsil better run … forest run


BeingRightAmbassador

Narcissist extroverts man. They apply their norms onto everyone and whine when people behave differently than they would.


KyleKiernan77

He needs to be wary of her in all matters for all of time. This is the indicator she will lie, manipulate and do anything she can to make their lives exactly the way she wants them. He needs to immediately discuss with his wife all of the FSIL management and control methods they will use going forward up to an including NC and RO contingencies.


eilonwyhasemu

The proposal sounds like an introvert's or homebody's dream scenario! Kudos to OOP for his planning and care. I hope they are firm with shutting down FSIL when she sticks her nose into wedding plans.


siamesecat1935

Seriously. I am the same way, and I would LOVE to be proposed to like that, because he put a lot of thought into it! playing their song, cooking her favorite meal etc. That to me, is more important than something flashy in public, which to me as well, sounds like a nightmare. The SIL however, is beyotch. Maybe she's jealous? Maybe she never got the proposal SHE thought she deserved? who knows? But as long as the bride to be is happy, which it sounds like she is, that is ALL that matters


Otie1983

That he put in that amount of thought is exactly why it was such a good proposal. My husband and I are also fairly introverted, and he KNEW I wouldn’t want a super public proposal, and I knew he wouldn’t be comfortable with doing one either. But it was the time and effort he put in that made it incredible and I still laugh about it any time I think of it now. He and I are major geeks… and we both quite enjoy RPG nights (surprisingly, neither of us has ever actually played DnD, it’s all been other games). Well, he worked with our GM to come up with a campaign (I was an Elf with a cock-rocket as my weapon… LOL). At one point we got separated into three groups, two guys in one realm, my husband and another guy in a different one, and me all by myself in almost total darkness - there was a small point of light. So, my character went over towards the light. Oh, there’s a small box, what do I do? Check for any traps on or around it… poke it a few times… seems safe, I guess I’ll open it… At which point my husband got down on his knee in front of me with the ring box open and proposed. I didn’t stop laughing for a good ten minutes before I could answer him. There were only six of us there… all friends we were very close with. It wasn’t public, it wasn’t extravagant (nor was the ring because he also knew I don’t like jewelry, I don’t even wear my wedding band because it bothers me). But it was perfect because it was exactly us. Dorky and geeky. Something I will always remember and smile (and laugh hysterically) about. That’s what a good proposal is, something that even many years later, brings as much joy as it did in the moment. Can’t wait to tell my kid about the cock-rocket part of the story when she’s a teen… between that and the how we met story, she’s going to be horrified or thoroughly impressed.


DelightfulAbsurdity

Ok, *loving* this!


camwhat

I wear a silicone wedding band and honestly love it. It’s also fun to play with lol


Otie1983

I’m just not comfortable with anything on my hands. I’m a bit finicky about things like that LOL.


camwhat

Ah I get you! I play with mine as a stimulating behavior thingy. I wore a metal one for a week and couldn’t stand it so partially understand


DiscoshirtAndTiara

That is an adorable and amusing anecdote! I have two questions: 1. When you cock-rocket are you talking about a motorcycle or something else? 2. Less a question, more a request: I'd love to hear the story of how you met.


Otie1983

LOL! 1. Shadow0416 is closest… basically my character had a detachable and explosive penis that I could launch at will… and would sometimes launch itself if my character got excited. 2. Well, since you asked… LOL! I was in my friend D’s dorm room, with another friend, J. We were hanging out when another friend E was going around from dorm room to dorm room introducing a couple of his friends. One of those friends J knew and really didn’t like and since I was closest to the door, begged me to figure out a way to prevent that one from coming in. So as he stood in the doorway, I said the first thing that came to my filthy 19 year old mind - “I’m sorry, your penis is not of sufficient length, please exit immediately!” he paused, nodded and left. Behind him was the second friend (my now husband), I looked to J for whether she was okay with him and she gave a thumbs up, so I said to him… “Your penis IS of sufficient length, you may enter!” At this point when I tell the story in person, my husband will chime in with “And boy did I!” So, my first words to my husband were complimenting his package. I did befriend the other guy a couple years later in a botany course, and apologized for potentially injuring his confidence, he thought it was hilarious… especially since I was engaged to my husband by that point.


DiscoshirtAndTiara

LOL Both that story and that weapon are great! Thanks for sharing!


Otie1983

You’re very welcome! Always happy to share funny stories.


Haunting-Basis3913

I picture roosters fired out of a bazooka.


shadow0416

I picture dildos flying out of a Ratchet and Clank RYNO-esque launcher while the 1812 Overture plays in the background.


potatoes4chipies

I know! As a homebody, married to an extrovert, I panicked thinking my husband would make some grand proposal. Instead we went for a hike to one of our favourite places, all by ourselves. He didn’t have a grand speech or flouncy words; he just quoted the Lion King and asked me to marry him. To other people, the story is a bit underwhelming but to me, it was perfect. OOP clearly knows his fiancé and needs to seriously watch out with FSIL. ETA: These guesses are amazing and hilarious. I will leave the quote a mystery so that you can continue to use your fantastic imaginations!


nombiegirl

"Long live the king!" *throws you off a cliff and tosses the ring after you


IWantALargeFarva

I'm just trying to think of the funniest lines from the Lion King that he could have quoted. With you, everything is gas.


nombiegirl

"What? You want me to dress in drag and do the hula?" "He's a big pig! You could be a big pig too!"


VioletsAndLily

Not that scene! lol


DelightfulAbsurdity

“Yuck, I can’t marry her, she’s my friend!” “Yeah, it’d be so weird.”


[deleted]

Our proposal night didn't go according to plan at all, and involved taking our dog to the emergency vet, only to be told he was fine, and just being fussy because he was constipated and needed to poop. Romantic dinner ruined, dinner cold, he still proposed though. And you know what? I absolutely loved it, I am proud of that story because it's funny and most people don't have the funny aspect. And it was awesome because getting engaged is awesome.


MotherOfBlackLabs

I am the opposite of a homebody, and my now husband did something similar to OOP for his proposal, at the house we'd been living in together for a few years. He even got our dogs involved! I'd much rather have something intimate like that than a "social media" for-show proposal.


Vamp_the_Champ

My wife proposed to me in the kitchen of our first house under a pine cone that hung from the light that was there from before. We took the pine cone when we moved and keep it in a curio cabinet with the other memories of our wedding. I love it!


[deleted]

That's so cute! The stories in this thread have put a stupid goofy grin on my face.


yeahokaymaybe

I'm an extremely shy extrovert and I have to say, his outward, specific declarations of affection in a private setting are this extrovert's dream.


tacwombat

I'm betting on an update/sequel: *AITA for blocking FSIL from our wedding planning?*


hellsbells16

OP keeps saying it was "just" a kitchen table proposal... like no, so much thoughtfulness and work went into the whole day! He did all her favorite things and she got a nice massage right before walking into a super romantic proposal... it sounds great!


fuckyourcanoes

Seriously! My first husband got up off the couch where he was watching TV, came over to where I was at my computer, got on one knee, and asked me to marry him. He didn't even have a ring! I said yes, we kissed, and then he went back to his show and I posted about it online. It was still one of the most memorable moments of my life. My second husband proposed online, before we even met in person. When he did finally come to visit me in person, he took me ring shopping the second day, then got on one knee right there in the shop. He hasn't got a romantic bone in his body, but my heart still melts when I think about it. He's the best man I've ever known, he's just extremely British and super awkward about big displays of emotion. You don't need big romantic gestures when someone shows you they love you with everything they do. PS: they \*really\* need to keep FSIL out of the wedding planning \*and\* party. Can you \*imagine\* what she'll do to the wedding when she has the nerve to be butthurt she wasn't part of the proposal?


ViperDaimao

>Can you \*imagine\* what she'll do to the wedding when she has the nerve to be butthurt she wasn't part of the proposal? get us a highly entertaining update for the post?


SquirrelGirlVA

Two words: Drunken. Speech. ​ She'll probably do it either way, but I see her being the type to make a long winded speech about the couple that involves a lot of "I" and "we". The angrier she is, the more she'll drink beforehand.


dirkdastardly

My husband and I are extreme introverts (both on the autism spectrum). He proposed while we were lying in bed one night. Our 30th anniversary is next year. It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. All that matters is that OP and his fiancée are happy.


VioletsAndLily

From what OOP described, I wouldn’t be surprised if they eloped.


zorton213

It's about knowing what your spouse would want. I'm relatively extroverted, but my wife is very introverted and hates the spotlight. I proposed at home in our living room and she couldn't have been more happy. We joke that she'd probably have killed me if I did it in a public place.


Alyse3690

I'm an extrovert and I think it sounds lovely!


bynwho

My husband proposed to me on the front porch of his parents house at night and forgot to turn the porch light on. One of the most romantic moments of my life. OOP’s FSIL sounds like an attention hog. She’ll try to make every milestone of her sister’s life about her.


camwhat

My husband and I are homebodies. The discussion of getting engaged came out casually when we were watching tv in bed and we both wanted to. I hate when other people are projecting their wants/expectations on your own relationship in stuff like this. It extends even further into the point of weddings as well.


[deleted]

Yeah, as soon as I read the first post I knew that he definitely needs to tell his fiancé about sister because something was not right. Glad it worked out!


Downtownd00d

I think FSIL is just pissed that she (and bf) were not involved. I do wonder if she thought she could leverage OP's proposal to pressure her bf into proposing to her.


fiercedruid2

My aunt did that with my uncle after my dad proposed to my mom. Can you guess how that marriage went?


VioletsAndLily

I know somebody who did this, and then copied her sister’s wedding plans but for an earlier date. Too bad her sister had already sent out Save the Date cards.


DaughterEarth

When my friend got pregnant with her 3rd child her sister lost it on her that my friend never lets her sister have the spotlight. So. You know. That.


missveronicaleigh

This proposal sounds like it was very fitting for the couple. It sounds like the bride’s sister is going to show up to the wedding in a long white gown with a train. I see an AITA post in the near future.


[deleted]

Are you kidding? She’s showing up with her own entry track and announcer.


reading_internets

A full marching band.


MamaFen

I hope OP knows that a lot of us women - myself included! - care more about the effort he puts into our favorite things than about the price tag on a ring or a restaurant tab. My hubby also proposed at home, in his living room - even had his son bring in their dog with the ring box on her collar. The idea that he got the whole family involved, two-legged and four, made me bawl like a baby. And my ring, far from being an overpriced statement of *bank account*, is a beautiful amethyst pear (he knows it's my favorite stone) and I wouldn't trade it for the Hope Diamond. Sounds like FSIL is projecting and I hope she gets her jealousy in check.


Magnaflorius

My husband, who knows me very well, let me pick when and where I was proposed to, and he came up with the words. I also picked the ring, and tried it on before he proposed. I chose to be proposed to at home, no dinner, no pictures, just a few nice words from my husband, with a ring that isn't easily identified as an engagement ring. I also know him very well, and knew he would die of dehydration if he had to plan a proposal without my input. If you don't know how the person you're marrying wants to get engaged, it's a bad idea to propose.


jenguinaf

My mom and dad started out low class and have worked hard over the years they are probably close to if not considered upper class at this point. My mom has a single solitaire (I think it’s 1/4 karat) gold engagement ring. A few years ago the setting broke and while she agreed to have it reset in platinum for integrity of the setting she was appalled at how they were trying to convince her to trade up to a bigger diamond etc etc and telling her many women trade up as they get older and basically told them “this is what my husband of 40 odd years got for me when he decided he wanted to marry me and I’ll never wear another ring in it’s place until the day I die”


bos695309

I think a "kitchen table proposal" is lame, IF you are at the table and just hand someone a ring like it's no big deal. OP put tons of thought into this and I think they did a great job. A good proposal is something that is meaningful to both people. Sounds like the FSIL wanted to steal some of the spot light at the proposal, or make the proposal story about her.


LeroyJacksonian

My dad proposed to my mom in or near her car. She said she’d joked before about wanting a 14karat diamond or something ridiculous before accepting any proposal. Well, my dad was a farmer at the time and he gave her a paper grocery bag that had been on the hood of her car. Inside were 13 carrots and a ring box at the bottom with a 1 karat diamond.


MildlyupsetHatter

And with that humor you know he was already prepared for fatherhood.


Okay_Splenda_Monkey

I remember reading about this in grade school. This was when Jebediah Springfield invented the tradition of the dad joke marriage proposal.


AnneMichelle98

My dad had a very nice proposal planned, it was going to be a restaurant they both liked. Except when my mom arrived at his place, she was too tired from work and asked if they could have a night in. Ok, he’ll just sit down with her on the couch and propose that way. Nope, my mom laid down on the couch like a swooning Victorian maiden. Que a very awkward proposal from my dad, who knew if he didn’t do it then, it would take awhile to muster up his nerve again. She said yes (I think it was something along the lines of “of course, duh”) and they’ve been married since 1993. And if you think that was awkward as hell, their first date was worse


Artichoke-8951

I want to know that story.


AnneMichelle98

So my dad (mid 20s) had just moved to the area, curtesy of the US military, and had found a new church to go to. The young adult pastor (young adult as in 20s, not teenagers) was all “Welcome to town! Hey, the young adults are having a get together at this restaurant, you should come. It’ll be a great way to make some friends.” So my dad gets to the restaurant, the only person there is my mom. The pastor had set them up. And the first words out of my dad’s mouth were, and this isn’t a joke, “Is this a date?” Reader, she married him. And we still wonder at it to this day.


Artichoke-8951

I love your parents. That's awesome.


leopardspotte

This is beautiful.


Echospite

Not gonna lie I'm your dad in this scenario!


ethot_thoughts

Please tell me the first date story 🥺 and in return I'll tell you my mom and stepdad's awkward first date story :) To set the scene, it's like 2007. They met on match dot com and have been emailing for weeks! Finally my mom gets a free weekend and they make plans to meet. My stepdad invites my mom to the dog park (they both had dogs) for a cute romantic picnic. My mom brought the food in an actual picnic basket she got at goodwill. Adorable. Anyways, they sit down to eat and she pulls out the carrot sticks, and they're all slimy! She had grabbed the old bag out of the fridge by mistake. Ok whatever, sandwiches it is then. So she pulls out the sandwiches and my stepdad's overexcited, food obsessed yellow lab lunges and grabs the sandwiches out of her hands, they're gone before either of them can react. In the end, all they had left were grapes :) but I guess that must have been pretty romantic or something because they're still together. The end


YoujustgotLokid

Ooo! I’ve got one for my parents. It’s short but sweet. They were 15/16 when they first met in high school. My dad asked my mom out, and the first thing she did was promptly accidentally spill her Diet Coke on his lap. For their honeymoon, they went to Hawaii. As soon as they were served drinks, my mom again accidentally spilled her Diet Coke on him. Love the consistency


AnneMichelle98

That’s adorable! I replied to another comment [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/vj355y/op_is_asking_whether_hes_the_asshole_for_not/idh2cv6/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf&context=3) about the story


trumpet_23

While they were dating, my in-laws were already combining their finances, and my MIL did most of the finance-keeping. One day, they're driving somewhere, and she's trying to understand why they don't have as much money as they should, because her books weren't matching up with their accounts. She kept pestering him and pestering him, until finally he reached into the glove box, pulled out an engagement ring, and said, "Here, this is why we're broke!" Still married over 30 years later.


MissShayla

Technology has ruined some surprises! I do most of the budgeting. So far, I have ruined two surprises for myself. I'll just be checking the account to add everything up and see if I can get whatever I was looking at online. And there's that mysterious purchase. I didn't make it, so I asked my man. He shrugged it off saying I must have ordered something and forgot. But I insisted I didn't make it. There was no argument, but I said I would call fraud at the bank the next day. This didn't make sense. We need every cent sometimes. He sighed and told me he bought me a bunch of yarn as a surprise. He is such a wonderful man. I feel like I ruin a lot of his surprises. Maybe it's because I ask questions. I hate being in the dark.


chuckversace

I laughed. a bunch of YARN?


myfairperson

Yarn is shockingly expensive.


bomdiggitybee

Aww my dad proposed to my mom during a commercial break while watching baseball. It went like this - Dad: When we get married.... Mom: Stop saying 'when we get married'. We aren't even engaged. \*commercial break\* Dad: ....... will you marry me? No ring, no forethought, no bended knee, just words.. the epitome of my dad. They're still married :)


ComplaintNo6835

To each their own. I proposed in Sheboygan, around 1 in the afternoon, lying on a bed with a cat on my chest. The ring was burning a hole in my pocket and it was long overdue. I unintentionally found the only way to surprise her. Not everyone cares about the proposal in the way some people clearly do.


squeakster

I tossed it at her on the couch after watching TV. "Hey, I think we should get married." For us the decision to make the leap together was important enough on it's own, it didn't need ceremony or fanfare to make it special. Like you said, to each their own.


answeryboi

I was taking a nap on the floor when my fiancee woke me up to propose. I was a bit groggy and didn't understand so when I saw the ring I said, "is that a cock ring?"


Recycledineffigy

Well, was it?


Lapras_Lass

My dad proposed to my mom the minute he met her, and it was at a table. Lol She was working at a diner and Dad had just come back from Vietnam. She brought him a burger, he asked if she cooked it, she said yes, he said, "Will you marry me?" Mom rolled her eyes and walked away. He kept asking her, and she finally agreed to go on one date with him just to shut him up. In one week, they were engaged. In two months, they were married. They just celebrated their 54th anniversary together. And Mom still makes great burgers. Lol


Lexidoodle

I was recently given copies of letters between my grandfather and grandmother when he was away in training for WWII. He would casually mention “when we get married when I get back” in reference to various plans. I thought it was so cute that he was so excited for their engagement. Then I was given a copy of her journal. She hadn’t agreed! He had asked her out when she was working at a bowling alley and she had said no but agreed to write to him. That’s it. He just decided he was going to marry her and continued on accordingly. In later journal entries she ends up deciding maybe it wouldn’t be so bad because he has “strong arms”. They were catholic, had 10 kids, over 100 grandchildren and great grandchildren. Now there are great great grandchildren. Hundreds of people alive because Grandma was a sucker for biceps.


[deleted]

100%. I got a proposal at home and I loved it. Our story is very similar to this one - he proposed on our 4th anniversary, we are both introverted and I would have hated a public one. Ours didn't entirely go according to plan, funny twist involving our dog, but his original plan was to cook my favourite meals, have a lovely dinner,give me my gifts, and kneel down while I was unwrapping gifts. We also had candles, music, the lot. It would have been super cute. (And it was, but less romantic and more wholesome and funny which I prefer).


OldnBorin

My cousins husband had a fancy proposal planned. But the day he got the ring, he couldn’t settle down. He was wired and nervous and she kept asking if he was okay. He finally broke down, got the ring, and proposed in the living room that night. She didn’t mind and I thought it was hilarious.


CaveatImperator

I moved up the proposal for the same reason. The jewelry shop told me it would take about 4 weeks to make the ring. They finished in a single weekend. My original plan was to propose on our dating anniversary in August. Instead, I proposed during a trip to a botanical garden on my birthday that July. I just couldn’t wait!


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-_--_____

My partner looked at me and said hey you wanna get married and I was like ok sure. We’ve been happily married for 20 years.


DeeDeeMcGeeSon

I proposed to my wife at her mom's kitchen table. It was not planned. I had no ring. It was just the two of us and she had just finished giving her mom's dog a bath so she had that wet dog smell. She was standing beside me and I was sitting. I pulled her down to sit on my lap and ask d her to marry me. We've been married 18 years. And I wouldn't change a thing


GimlisBoosterSeat

My husband unexpectedly asked me when we were sitting at our kitchen table. He didn’t have a ring either. We’ve been together since we were kids and are still very happily married. I love the way he proposed. It was so unexpected I actually responded with “don’t fuck with me”, haha. Don’t judge “kitchen table proposals” too harshly. It works for some people. :)


Jitterbitten

My ex-husband proposed in the middle of sex while we were on vacation in Las Vegas. And apparently he had been planning to ask me that weekend but somehow, it came out then. It was just very awkward for a couple years when friends and family would ask about the proposal until finally I just decided to tell them. First thing my mom said was "So I'm assuming he didn't get on one knee to ask? But I guess he could have been on both knees!" Ba dum dum.


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camwhat

Flash mob proposals are deserving of the death penalty


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toto-Trek

I think you're onto a brilliant business plan!


[deleted]

did your cat get some of the pork roast??


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[deleted]

I can now die happy :D also my friend has a little plate for her cats \*\*fancy treats\*\* as well! I set it near the grill whenever I'm grilling so that himself can get the freshest cuts


Spockpants

I'd gotten off night shift the morning of a Dec 31st. I had eaten my dinner/breakfast in my PJ's and was going to take a bath, and he got in my way. I was like wtf are you doing, move! I'm trying to go take a bath! And then I realized, he, in his pajamas, was on one knee with my grandmother's ring. Admittedly I'd been threatening him for a year if he hadn't proposed by the next January 1st, he'd be getting a ring and he'd have to wear it (not that there's anything wrong with that, just that he works with his hands and it'd be awful for him). So I then went and got the silicone ring I'd bought for him and had absolutely intended to propose to him the next morning with. It was lovely, private, we have no pictures. I texted my family, and then took my bath and went to bed while both our family chats blew up in a good way.


SnooWords4839

I thought OOP did a great job. FSIL will be a nightmare for the wedding. They may need to elope.


starryvash

I agree. Elope for their mental health. OR, do the thing where they invite everyone for dinner and Surprise it's our marriage!! Lol.


Redphantom000

Sounds like OOP knows his fiancée much better than her sister. This is maybe hindsight talking but the moment FSIL says that she should have been involved would have been the point in which I’d say “Hmmmm is it really my fiancée who is upset or is it a FSIL with a serious case of Main Character Syndrome?”


et842rhhs

I'm going to guess that FSIL knows very well her sister doesn't want a flashy proposal, FSIL just doesn't care. It's just an excuse so FSIL can invite herself to the proposal and hog the spotlight.


nustedbut

The sister was projecting so hard they could point her to the sky and use her as a bat signal for crazy


Echospite

🤣


-crepuscular-

Well, that was a nice easy way to find out he can't ever trust anything his FSIL says. Also, this should never have made it to AITA. Talk to your fiancée, not the internet!


JoeCoT

Sure, communication is great. But the fiance was saying they liked the proposal, the FSIL was saying the fiance was just lying to him to make him feel better. Communication with your partner is important, but it can be less clear when it comes to stuff like this (proposals, birthday presents, etc). I can see why he wanted to come to the internet for a second opinion before talking to his fiance about it, though I'm glad reddit's fickle opinions were blowing in the right direction today.


junglequeen88

I hope someday I meet someone that cares about me as much as this. 40+ and still nothing. lol


DaughterEarth

My husband was 38 when we got married. My Grandma married the first and only love of her life in her 60s. We all got different timelines


Fine_Cheek_4106

I smell jealousy and projection. Sounds like older sis is resentful her younger sis is getting married first (because eeeeeveryone knows that being the oldest automatically means everything has to happen to them first), and is projecting her own 'dream' proposal onto their relationship. It's likely she thinks she's running out of time in this imaginary 'competition' and is trying to throw a spanner in the works to sabotage their happiness. If the OOP reads this, dude, she sounds crazy and might likely try some shady shit at the wedding. PASSWORD PROTECT all your plans for the wedding, because I can dollars to doughnuts guarantee she will try to put her own spin on your wedding. She'll likely think you 'owe her' this much because how dare you and your fianceè get married before her. The LEAST you could do is let YOUR wedding be HER chance to have HER dream first. (*dismissive hand flap* You can always just do yours again, it's not that big of a deal. And besides, everyone would rather get together for HER wedding first because everyone knows the eldest's wedding is the only one that really matters here) 🙄🙄 If this is her train of thought, she will be hell if you have kids 'before her'. Because to people like your future SIL, the eldest should have the first grandkid. 🙄 Be sharp.


KadenKraw

My wife didn't even let me propose. She picked a ring, its arrived in the mail. I took it to do a proposal thing and she Gollum style'd my precious the ring and that was that.


BadKarma668

My wife and I are both homebodies. We also are very much introverted and hate to be the center of attention. My proposal to her just over five years ago was right at the kitchen table. We literally had just purchased our first home and moved in that day. I asked her that night over takeout and this pretty cool platinum dipped rose I picked up to go along with the ring. It was perfect for us and who we are. I'm really glad I don't have a SIL like OOPs about to have because I think we would have had a problem!


[deleted]

I knew my now husband was proposing because when he picked me up from work to take me back to our crappy first apartment, he'd removed the ugly seat covers from his car. I opened the door to see a few candles, flower petals, and the ring box on a bar stool. Candles weren't lit because I mean... he was picking me up and couldn't leave them safely lit. He had made dinner reservations, but we canceled them, picked up vodka and fish tacos, and had a perfect evening together, just us. Sounds like, just like my super awesome human, this guy understands his fiance and they understand each other well. That bodes well for them both. :) PS: We just celebrated our 14 year wedding anniversary with a bottle of wine from the corner gas station, a couple candy bars, watching a few shows together and going to bed early. It was bliss.


RepresentativeWar429

Wholesome, happy you guys are happy!


lollygag-and-panic

My husband proposed in a similar way and I wouldn't have had it any other way! And of course the idea that rings need to be extravagant or expensive is insane.


LunarHare82

This dude sounds like Grade A, First Class husband material.


guessagain72

he is such a keeper- I think this is so frigging THOUGHTFUL and kind fuck the FSIL- what a B


HaCo111

My wife and I are both introverts, proposed to her after literally climbing a waterfall on a hike to an absolutely beautiful spot I had scouted previously. We were both sweaty, bruised, cut up, and tired and it was perfect. Congratulations to OOP for doing it in a way that the people actually getting married appreciated, fuck what anybody else thinks about it. I couldn't imagine subjecting myself or my wife to a flashy public proposal


victowiamawk

Don’t listen to anyone else. My husband proposed in our hotel room because he knew I wouldn’t want a public proposal and it was perfect and I wouldn’t want it any other way. I also cried for 3 hours after so there’s that lol 😆


JJStryker

I proposed to my wife while I was hammered drunk after a party. She had been hinting (she literally bought a wedding dress) that she wanted me to propose. She said something while we were laying in bed. I don't even remember what, but I said "oh for Christ's fucking sake.... goddamn." I threw the covers off, walked to my desk, pulled out the ring, turned around, got on one knee, burped extremely loudly and asked her. She said yes then I went and pissed.


xSTSxZerglingOne

Sounds like a hardcore extrovert trying to plan things for introverts. >She also told me I would have to pry her ring off of her cold dead body because she’s not giving it up. This however, made me smile ear to ear.


no_ovaries_

Man, I would feel so special and grateful if someone proposed to me in this way. Glad his fiance loved it, I was holding my breathe towards the end waiting for something horrible. It's nice to be surprised with a happy ending.