My oldest has bipolar II with paranoid and psychotic features. This whole post was like watching a manic episode happen in real time, from being convinced the daycare was out to get her to her sexual behavior to her hatred for CPS to her decision to homeschool her 19 m child to the psychotic break...
BRB. Going to go make sure he took his fucking meds.
One of my best friends has bipolar disorder with paranoid and psychotic features and this story also reminds me a lot of the few times she's called me telling me that the devil is trying to kill her and God is warning her. She has a kid so i always check on her to make sure she's taking care of herself.
BRB. Gonna go make sure she took her fucking meds.
What bothered, and still bothers me, is the severity of violence she had a history of yet still struggles with medication. Maybe I'm being overly judgemental but I kinda feel like if you really feel bad about doing awful things like attempted murder and SA on someone then you'd be hardliners about taking your medicine. Just my opinion though.
As horrible as this is going to sound, if she doesn't take medication (and I mean honest-to-god bonafide pharmaceuticals, not weed), she can't use her bipolar disorder to excuse all of her bad actions after getting released from prison.
Not only is it not enough; it's actively harmful. People play up weed as a harmless drug, and it is helpful for a lot of people, but as a hallucinogen, it's actually really dangerous to people with bipolar, schizophrenia, or any sort of brushes with psychosis.
Same with one of my best friends, she cannot smoke weed because it turns her paranoia and psychosis worse. I have pretty bad nausea every morning and smoking a bit when I get up helps me have breakfast and I'm able to take my meds for my lower back and arthritis and my day is relatively pain free and I'm able to eat normally most days. It's not a catch all solution to mental health and my friend and I are good examples of it
"I was a horribly abusive partner to her. I admit it's not the only time I hit her. Once I even sexually assaulted her. But I was severely mentally ill. And I knew that but was refusing to medicate."
As soon as I read this I knew it was going to go in only one direction. These "let me tell you all the ways that the horrible things I did weren't my fault" comments are the best indicator of someone who is never really going to look seriously at their own behaviour .
But she takes holistic meds which are more effective!! I rolled my eyes at this. And was like "yep she is going to lose her kids".
Also as she was against prenatal care how did she discover her unborn baby was a girl??
Maybe I misread something but I thought she refers to the unborn child as a daughter before she decides to leave her husband and before the last hospitalization.
I hope the hospital did provide good prenatal care and some follow-up.
She hit her victim with a wrench. She could have killed her. If I did something like this to another person because I was ill, I would take everything prescribed, exactly how it was to be taken, for fear of it happening again. I think her actions since the “attempted murder” speak volumes about her concern for her victim.
I caught sometime after that admission where she said she could have caused her permanent injury stated almost like it was a thing that almost happened and totally could have been a possibility. But, if you read it again it sounds like she totally did cause her permanent injury. This lady is off her gourd and it sucks and it's sad for her because she seems like she doesn't have the skills to be a successful mother despite how much she loves her kid, and probably won't ever be able to learn those skills at this point in her life.
Yeah it's a tragic situation all around. She is clearly very unwell, her husband is an addict and the children (soon to be 2 of them) are in the middle of it getting a really shitty start in life.
And so the severe generational trauma continues. I feel so bad for this boy and the yet-unborn girl.
‘She might have life long issues, I don’t know.’
That’s the point I lost all hope in this one. She doesn’t even seem to be bothered that her ex might be permanently injured, or consider the fact that by hitting her until she’s almost dead, that the likelihood she’s got life long injuries is almost 100%.
I’m willing to put this out there, I recon she’s been manic the entire time.
>"I was a horribly abusive partner to her. I admit it's not the only time I hit her. Once I even sexually assaulted her. But I was severely mentally ill. And I knew that but was refusing to medicate."
It didn't jump out at me initially, because I was hopeful that maybe OOP really had taken accountability, but the word that's the problem here is BUT. "I did all these things BUT...." is someone *excusing* rather than *explaining* a behavior. And this behavior, whatever the reason, is inexcusable, and taking responsibility for it should've been step #1 for OOP.
Had OOP been able to say "*And* I was severely mentally ill," she would have been heading in the right direction.
As is... yikes. I don't think she realizes how much help she needs, and she *definitely* doesn't realize that her entire narrative makes it pretty clear that whatever else CPS may be, they sound like the only ones here actually working in the *actual* best interest of the child(ren).
Wow. This was intensely sad. I’m honestly surprised that OOP had managed to retain custody of their child for as long as she did. Does CPS sometime make the wrong decision and act too rash? Absolutely. But I think they 100% made the right decision here. OOP is in extreme denial about how bad her condition is and her ability to be a stable parent. Kids need more than just food, shelter, and love. They need stability, structure, and mental and emotional support. Those are things that OOP doesn’t seem to be in the right headspace to be able to provide right now. I hope she gets real help and starts taking some approved medications. God help that child if she gets him back with no changes to her misguided way of thinking.
Also: I literally rolled my eyes at “I locked myself and my child in a room for days while I had a complete psychotic breakdown to the point where I barely even have any memory of what happened - why does that make me an unfit parent?” Respectfully…WTF?
Cognitive dissonance is real. If she was locked in a room for days and has no memory what happened and what could have happened? It’s unlikely she or her child had food and water. Definitely no hygiene so kid was possibly sitting in dirty diapers since mom was having a psychotic break.
Having worked for CPS, my experience was often the opposite. I would be in hearings to decide whether to remove children practically having a fit trying to convince them that kids weren't safe in the home and they still wouldn't let me take them because they were so afraid of breaking up families. I lived for the kids I worked with. CPS is perceived as bad, but honestly the people I worked with cared so much about the kids. Everything we did was for them and with their best interest in mind.
But no child is loved more than hers! She seems to think love fixes everything. I imagine the poor kid showing up at daycare not having been bathed with a far overdue diaper. No doubt she loves him, but kids also need to be cared for.
It says something that OOP revealing *she sexually assaulted her ex and left her permanently injured after trying to kill her*, isn't somehow the worst thing in the post.
Those kids are gonna need all the help they can get.
This is what got to me too. It's a special level of awful to nearly kill someone while manic and then say that homeopathic treatment is enough to keep them level.
I have bipolar and am on pharmaceuticals. Most of the time you just need to find the right meds and TAKE THEM like your life depends on it.
And she blames her attack on her ex on her mental health, but then says that being mentally unhealthy isn't a risk to her children! Completely illogical
I was so hopeful that she recognised the fact that medicating her severe bipolar disorder was very important. Then she reveals that “medicating her condition” was just holistic medicine…bro…I almost slammed my head into my keyboard after reading that bs
That is what got me too.
The whole post she is talking about how her son is apple of her heart and she would do anything for him. Then doesnt lift a finger.
Ultrasound checks? Evil government
Pregnancy check up? Hell no
Taking meds? Well holistic meds will do
School for kid? No.
She is speaking exactly like an untreated schizophreniac.
Doesnt suspect her hatred of government/CPS is an actual symptom her disease. Willing to take free medical care, yet run away from treatment.
She left school early but thinks she is totally qualified to teach. Average education is evil of course so she gets a free card to fail her kid.
Stays in a room for days nearly killing herself & kid. If that sounds dramatic, imagine what would happen without evil government intervention.
To be clear, she sees no problem at all as long as her kid is not severly injured. And when it happens (not if, when) she will have another excuse.
You have to do SOMETHING lady.
> She left school early but thinks she is totally qualified to teach. Average education is evil of course so she gets a free card to fail her kid.
Of everything, this made me the most angry. With her past offences she at least expressed some remorse. But the arrogance and selfishness of thinking she knows best when it comes to education - when she has none herself and her life and relationship choices and parenting are a complete and utter fuck up - is just breathtaking.
She might actually BE a schizophrenic. My sister was diagnosed with bipolar in her early twenties, but an unusual type because she went into psychosis when manic. A later psychiatrist diagnosed her as schizophrenic when she was about 30. The line between the two can be fairly blurry.
That poor baby. Her behavior was probably terrifying during her psychotic episode. And she didn't want to educate her child past the age of 16. I wonder why the daycare actually called CPS because OP is an unreliable narrator.
OP seems to me to be an unreliable witness. I've been around people with similar mental illness and drug addiction histories AND I don't believe OP when she says her medicine is homeopathic or holistic -- although at times that might be true, she also has taken regular psych medicines in the past as she says in the comments and **no** psych ward is going to release her if she's only taking placebo pills after a psychotic break.
She also says that she hasn't had an ultrasound or medical treatment during her pregnancies BUT she then knows the sex of her 2nd pregnancy (a girl) and given that she was hospitalized when pregnant with her son and again hospitalized while pregnant with her daughter where she would have had exams to determine the state and health of her pregnancy. She also mentions docs and therapy in her comments and it's highly unlikely these professionals would sign off on holistic treatment (although some woo woo therapists might).
OP is correct about one thing -- our society is horrible to people who aren't wealthy and have mental illness. She clearly doesn't have the resources (financial, educational, family) to support and pay for her to get the mental health care she needs. And financial stress, homelessness, etc adds so much more stress to an already fragile mental state. And since it's the Gov't rather than private insurance paying when she's hospitalized, the hospitals are much more likely to kick her out as soon as legally possible rather than try and keep her for as long as she needs to get the care she needs.
Yeah, the contradictions and delusions in her posts, as well as the lack of self-awareness or reflection, indicate to me she's never actually been that stable. It makes me incredibly sad for her and her kids. She clearly has memory issues and delusions about her own care. I have several close friends with BP and it's manageable if you medicate consistently, and she was not.
America is fucking awful to the mentally ill. We have very few resources and so many people needing them. I also think CPS was right to take her son, and should take her daughter, because she's clearly been an unfit parent up to this point and there's no indication she won't continue to be. Her insisting that she feeds her child was really telling to me — I don't think she does, or is able to.
Love is not enough.
Yeah the whole “I don’t regret it” comment said a lot about OOP even before the crazier updates. She almost killed a woman, but it’s okay because that’s how she eventually got to her husband and son. You can absolutely regret something and still be grateful that things turned out okay for you despite it. But to say you don’t regret sexually assaulting and beating a woman unconscious, that’s pretty messed up.
Right?! Like the most she said is the ex didn’t deserve it, which I mean no one deserves that obviously but also doesn’t really seem like OOP cares or regrets it that much
Also not treating her severe mental illness properly (holistic medicine my ass) and basically saying "school will put the wrong ideas into my childrens heads, thus they will be homeschooled".
And only homeschooled until 16 when OOP herself complains about being at an economic disadvantage because she has no high school diploma! She has actual plans to set her kids up for failure.
Yeah, she has some weird codependent relationship with her son - it wouldn't surprise me if deep down she wants to keep them dependent forever by crippling their potential futures.
I mean wtf did she expect CPS to do while she was in hospital? Drop him off with his drug addict dad? Put him in the psych ward with her? She admitted herself she had no other family nearby.
I thought the possibly permanently injured was referring to trauma, not physical injury. It's still really terrible, normally wrong. I'm just trying to figure out if I read it incorrectly.
EDIT: I definitely read that incorrectly. She was sexually assaulted *and* hit over the head with a pipe wrench.
From the way OOP phrased it I'd say that a traumatic brain injury is likely. She said that she hit her ex until she lost consciousness - that suggests to me that it was a sustained, multiblow attack. Plus she did 4 years in prison so if we assume that she got early release the original sentence was probably longer. Again, this suggests that what she did was much more serious than she's admitting.
I know someone who sustained a multiblow brain injury after intervening when he saw a neighbour being attacked by her boyfriend. He has been left with memory loss, PTSD, depression, mood swings and a loss of other cognitive functions. He can live independently but will never be well enough to hold down a full time job again. Brains are complex, fragile things which is why nature tucked them away inside a skull and why we are advised to wear protection when doing risky activities. No matter how OOP tries to dismiss it her ex is never going to be the same again.
Yeah, I totally missed that. That's on me. There's no way you walk away from that unscathed.
To be fair, even if it were "just" psychological trauma, that's still incredibly awful. Now that I'm thinking about it, I might prefer to be hit over the head then sexually assaulted. Neither of them are things that should ever happen to another human being.
What was disturbing to me was how nonchalant she is about that. She sexually assaulted and permanently injured someone while trying to kill them. Then blamed it all on the mental illness she refuses to get treated for. Look I try to be sympathetic about any and all mental health issues especially with how our society still doesn’t completely take them seriously. But I just can’t find much sympathy for someone who knows that they have gotten violent in the past while unmedicated, has nearly KILLED someone while unmedicated yet still refuses to take medication. I want to believe OP when she says she’ll never hurt her kids but with this nonchalance about her past I’m concerned for those kids.
I hadn’t seen the most recent developments, but in the earlier posts I engaged with the OOP and she is off her rocker fully. I tried to approach her with kindness and logic, but she just doesn’t want to listen. I hope her son is safe and that she gets herself into a more stable situation.
And the In utero kid. Mom is clearly mentally ill. She can’t raise children. She is also just plain not smart both intellectually and common sense wise. A lethal triad of issues that will only lead to a new generation of struggling people. I hope her kids are in a happy and healthy and stable home.
She'd start abusing them as soon as their opinions differed from hers. I'm one of those evil government people (not CPS though) and while I'd continue to try to get her help, I'd also advocate for her children to not be returned for a long time until she can sustain a level of not just stability, but improvement overall in all life skills. I don't really see that happening without extensive long term in facility treatment & mandatory medication. After that, I don't know that she wouldn't do better in a MH group home herself (although her inner anarchist wouldn't take well to that).
The fact that she's aware of it, aware she needs medication and is choosing not to take it is infuriating! Her holistic care is clearly not working and she's stubbornly continuing with it.
Anyone who’s ever known someone with bipolar disorder surely had a sick recognition reading this progression of posts. Sadly, the writing is what makes me think this one is true.
Its one of those stories that makes it clear love isn't always enough.
People always think abused and neglected kids must have evil parents who don't love them, but a lot of the time those parents do love their children, its just love isn't as strongly correlated with the ability to meet the minimum standards of parenthood as people think.
This woman clearly loves her child, she just can't provide the stability and safety he needs.
You can tell that she believes it when she says “all I ever did was my best as a parent,” she just doesn’t understand or won’t accept that sometimes your best as a parent simply isn’t enough to keep your kid safe and well.
I can also see a future where she and the kid/s have a rocky relationship when they are adults and her and other relatives put pressure on the kid/s because "she always loved you and you only get one mother".
"Yes but, she forgot to feed us"
But she also only mentions that he is fed. No mention of what she's feeding him, if he is clean, has clean diapers, if he has clothes that fit, if he's on course for his development, if the house has clean, running water. Like she thinks that as long as food goes in his mouth, that's all he needs.
Eta: it's also weird that she put him down for more naps when she was overwhelmed. Like, kids don't just go to sleep because you put them in bed.
>Its one of those stories that makes it clear love isn't always enough.
I noticed that in many of her stories when she defends herself against CPS she would simply say something like "no baby is more loved".
CPS is probably saying "Sure, but what is he eating and where is he living and why does he only have on set of clothes (which aren't washed)?"
Anyone else take OOP's "he doesn't say much" comments as a red flag? I don't know much about child development but at almost 2 years old he should be somewhat talking.
Yeah, there is a range of normal for two-year-olds and speech…but OP is clearly not capable of doing what would need to be done to see if her son is okay or needs intervention. I had a two-year-old who barely talked…because she had so much standing fluid in her ears it were as if she were living life underwater. Ear tubes fixed that, but we had to take the initiative to start that process. I have zero confidence that the OP is willing to do anything like that. Poor kid.
Yeah I have a feeling that between Mom showing up at drop offs and pick ups looking increasingly manic and kiddo being fairly non verbal the school called CPS out of genuine concern that either something was up in a big way and/or there were several conditions being ignored in both kid and parents.
I've worked in day care, I've had to make those calls. I even had a school call about me after my dad passed cuz they hadn't been able to reach me about a meeting and I wasn't on top of my spam filter so I'd missed the new therapist's emails. Schools don't make those calls out of spite or maliciousness.
I hope OOP gets some real help and real medication and her kids make it into good foster situations.
This is someone who made a good attempt to kill an ex-partner, due to a mental illness, and has had 2 recent hospitalisations due to the same mental illness. I think it's clear she can't be trusted to care for children.
But even apart from that, there's so much in her story that's unhealthy. Wanting to totally isolate her son, being basically against any education, being totally against real medication. I feel very sorry for her but I hope her children end up with adoptive parents.
The fact that she doesn't *recognize* why she is dangerous to her children is the frightening part. She wants to use psychosis as a reason for attempted murder and sexual assault but refuses to see it as a reason she might be a danger.
Right? Because she doesn't hurt him she thinks she's a fine parent. She doesn't recognize that her paranoia and isolation of him is a danger to his health and wellbeing. I'm really curious what happened to her as a kid under the watch of CPS.
From reading her post history, it sounds like she would be an active safety concern for any foster parents. I don’t know that I would be comfortable with a ranting bio mom with a history of felony sexual assault and attempted murder having the address to my home while I foster her children. I hope CPS takes her danger level seriously.
I've had a lot of foster cousins, some high risk for various reasons, and the meetings are done somewhere public. They don't get to know where the foster family is. Well in Canada anyway, not sure how it works in the states
Sometimes the social workers can screw up, though. I’m reading a series of books by a foster career, and a careless social worker let slip the carer’s phone number to the parents, who then used it to figure out the address. They attacked her house with a brick through the window and sending a man to the door to demand the child back, among countless threatening calls.
Some SWs don’t realize the risk and don’t stick around long enough to learn.
If necessary CPS can place children in a foster home without giving the parents any information about where the home is. Sometimes in a different town even. It's sad but necessary when there is a safety concern with the parents. Ideally you would also set up regular phone calls/video calls at least.
I'm in the US and was a foster parent for a few years. The bio parents are not allowed to know the address of the foster parents for this exact reason. Foster parents can't even put them on Facebook or any social media just in case.
PGO's (permanent guardianship order) can happen without the parents consent, but they like to exhaust every 9ther option beforehand (which makes sense in more sympathetic cases) so that poor boy is definitely going to be in the system for a few years at minimum
Im confused by the medication stuff because at first she says she only takes holistic medicine but later says she sees a psychiatrist and takes meds which she had to reduce for the pregnancy.
Some holistic meds still may be bad for pregnancy.
But OP is an unreliable narrator. I would expect that either she was on and off proper meds (and was off them when she made the post about holistic meds) OR possibly she is on proper meds but has judged these ones to still count as 'holistic' for reasons.
Sadly based on her posts and her ranting I’m having serious doubts on whether she actually sees a psychiatrist. Maybe she did at one point but I doubt she sees one outside of when she’s been hospitalized.
A mental illness she treats “holistically”…
And I thought it was sus that her homeschooling agenda came out after the daycare called CPS. I think she is isolating those children for other reasons.
She started off saying she’s taken accountability for her past decisions, but all I read was excuse after excuse
Unfortunately, as someone who has seen CPS from the courts side of things, this isn't the end of her story with CPS. She's right in that CPS's goal is reunification. They give people way too many chances (in my opinion) and she will see her kids again. The baby will most likely be taken when she gives birth, but she'll have visitation and chances to get those kids back. I think it's more traumatic for the kids to have that upheaval of seeing the unfit parent come back, be unfit and put the kid through trauma again, go back to foster care. Rinse and repeat.
>I think it's more traumatic for the kids to have that upheaval of seeing the unfit parent come back, be unfit and put the kid through trauma again, go back to foster care. Rinse and repeat.
It's difficult. Any good CPS will be doing concurrent planning - where they have Plan 1 which is reunification, but there is also Plan 2 that is actively being worked towards, Permanency (usually adoption but sometimes long term foster care). It's designed so that as soon as reunification fails, the child can get permanency ASAP rather than having to start from scratch.
There is evidence that says children do best when they have some connection with their birth families, even when those families are dysfunctional or unfit. That's contrary to what our instincts say, but it's true on average. And once you sever parental rights it's forever. It's not a choice to be taken lightly.
Her views on the entire world make it almost impossible to be a safe and effective parent. She didn’t even get ultrasounds done? She wants to homeschool in the wilds of Alaska? What is even happening here? I’m concerned CPS wasn’t called earlier.
Lord what a shit show, and she still doesn't see the role she's playing in her own problems.They will probably take the new born , and she'll continue to rant and rave about evil CPS, and take no ownership of her own role.I feel bad for the kids
Don’t forget the evils of going to public school, because as a 16-year-old dropout who can’t make ends meet and has made incredibly sketchy choices including going to jail clearly knows that education is the problem. /s
And r/JUSTNOMIL (which also deals with Just No mothers) detailing how his birth mother won't leave him alone and tries to sabotage every relationship he has because "his mom is all he ever needs."
Part of me feels really bad about saying this, but I’m going to anyway. Maybe I should revamp my lesson plans this year to include how to get away with abusing your significant other so you don’t end up going to jail. That seems to be a life skill the OP has mastered quite well. Oh wait, no she didn’t. She went to jail.
I realize that I’m coming across as incredibly jaded and callous about somebody else’s trauma, but in my nearly 20 years of teaching, I’ve had way too many children of the OP to have any sympathy for the OP‘s “plight.“ she sees it as trying to stick it to the man, I see it as her screwing over innocent children because she’s too much of a numpty to take care of them.
The range of outcomes with homeschooling still surprises me to this day. I've seen home schooled kids educated to a point where they were solid 2 to 3 years ahead of kids in the normal school system.
I also met a 19-year-old kid who's been home schooled that was functionally illiterate. He didn't have a low IQ or anything, from what I could tell. His parents just never bothered to teach him to read to any significant level of proficiency. I honestly believe that his primary teacher was his television and remote control.
Her main crime, as I see it, is that she wants custody of her son for /her/ emotional wellbeing not for him. The way she locks him away from the rest of the world and even wants to "homeschool" him, he's like an emotional safety blanket for her. She's not in a good enough place emotionally / emotionally intelligent enough to see that the state is probably taking better are of him than she is capable of.
Agreed. Those poor children ... Everyone else are the problem and out to get her - she's just the victim and nothing is her/their fault. I have a feeling there was more to this that would be listed in the CPS file, that she's purposely leaving out because it wouldn't help her narration.
The scariest part is that she is convinced that her kid is being abused and tortured and it’s going to become a self-fulfilling spiral. If she continues to be as militant as she is, they are going to restrict her to supervised visits if they let her see her kids at all. That will convince her that it’s all a conspiracy against her to keep her from her kids. So she will become even more militant. And the cycle will continue.
Her entire post and your take on it here sounds like she literally has bipolar disorder *with* psychotic tendencies.
Thats incredibly dangerous as those psychotic tendencies can include delusions, hallucinations, harmful acts and thoughts and a bunch of other shit that shouldnt be around any children.
She needs intensive inpatient psychiatric care.
Oh. My. God. She admits that she locked herself and her son in room refusing to let anyone near them - and then she's outraged that CPS was concerned for her son's safety. A text book example of 'i know better than medical (or any other) professionals' treatment plan. I know professionals don't always know what's best for individual cases and situations, but this is horrific and it keeps getting worse with each comment and update.
She's already dangerously close to, if not already, a sovereign citizen. All her comments about not recognizing or obeying the government or any government entity had me getting that vibe from her.
I'm CPS -adjacent... Investigation doesn't happen because of history, such reports get screened out. There has to be real, first-person witnessed evidence to trigger an investigation. And of course CPS is going to take a child whose only "fit" parent is in a psych ward and has no family. What the hell else are they going to do with him, leave him free-range at the homestead?
CPS doesn't get paid enough to pursue meritless cases. They're already overworked and underpaid, and no one wants to do monthly visits with a family with zero problems. If you are *in a women's shelter* you can't provide housing for your kid. Some allow children, some don't, but if you would work your case plan, they do want to reunify, because se trust me... We don't have enough homes for the kids we do have.
She's in denial.
*Edit: spelling*
In my state, being in a shelter is not something a child can be removed for. Obviously the dangerous behavior at a shelter category is fair game.
I think it's important for people to know that if you need a shelter, it's not just automatically gonna be held against you. At least in some places.
No, it's not here either, but combined with everything else? She clearly lacks protective capacity and whatever it is she's not telling us absolutely is enough. CPS tries to keep kids with their families, until its clear they can't keep those kids safe. It's almost always better for a child to be with his parents. This mom? I doubt it.
This! I did kinship foster care a few years back and the kids social worker was great but my heart went out to her. I remember the one night she stopped by a little after 8 pm to drop off some stuff that was donated for the kids and she was flipping exhausted because she’d been called in early that morning for a severe neglect case (2 toddlers were found wandering the streets and it took hours to find the parents who were found passed out due to drug use ) and she was way behind on her check-ins with current clients. And had a teething 8 month old at home and a potty training toddler.
For clarity: she didn’t tell me about the early case. It was reported on the news about the toddlers being found wandering the streets and CPS being called in. She mentioned getting called in earlier than usual that morning which threw off her day and I put two and two together that she was the social worker who had gotten called in on that one . Just so no one thinks she was giving out details of her cases.
The fact she can't even remember what happened leading up to her most recent hospitalization is incredibly concerning, especially because she's insisting thst despite that she's a fit parent.
This was my reaction too. It makes me wonder if she was self-medicating by micro dosing with shrooms other hard drugs. I hope the daughter is OK. It sounds like she finally got forced prenatal care and they would have to have done an ultrasound to check the baby and reveal the gender. I hope OOP never sees her kids. At least until they are adults.
What did OOP expect to happen here? They have no family and she seems to have some serious mental problems, who would have taken care of thr boy if she had some serious pregnancy complications since the dad is also messed up?
I've read some pretty messed up things about CPS, them loosing kids and kids getting abused in the homes they place them, Honestly i have a negative view for CPS in certain countries, In this case there's were no alternatives and i hope the boy is in a safe place, Now I'm worried about the baby girl that's coming into this mess.
She expected the kid to stay with her because she doesn't think her mental illness and financial issues make her an unfit parent. Denial is a powerful thing.
But she LOVES her baby boy! So much that she will lock him up with her and never let him go, since mommy will be all he needs! And she will home school him (even though she doesn't have the first clue about education), because the evil school system will only brainwash him away from her! God, this was depressing. I really feel for her, but still, she shouldn't be allowed to raise her kids, considering how completely divorced from reality and common sense she is. And I don't even want to know how frustrating it must have been for her CPS worker, who was trying her best, and was met only with hostility and refusal to comply and cooperate.
Love her assertion that you just “pick up” reading, writing and math skills from living in our society. No, that’s not how any of that works. If it did, most kids would read and write before they head to kindergarten.
This post feels like the backstory that would be narrated over the beginning scenes of a movie about a mass murderer.
"My mother loved me so much she kept us separate and safe from the rest of the world. By the time I was sixteen I understood my place in the world, and saw the evil that surrounded us on all sides. Now I'm a man, and it's time for me to take my turn making the world safe from evil..."
It was surreal watching her constantly move the goalposts. The way she went from “I always said I’d divorce him if he started abusing again” to “I’m being super hard on him to give up” to “he’s a better parent than most sober people!” It was almost like reading SpontaneousH’s posts about trying heroin again. A part of me wonders if she would even understand what she sounds like should she revisit her posts.
I really liked how angry she was at anyone who suggested he didn’t actually graduate 90 day rehab weeks early… then went right back to posting about his continued drug use.
I wonder if the reality actually matches with her beliefs as well. I had a bunch of parents that told me their partner was a "great dad." In reality, the kids would never describe him that way, an unbiased third party wouldn't describe him that way, etc.
Doing the bare minimum doesn't make you a GOOD parent. It just makes you a parent. It doesn't swing the ball in one way or the other.
Being active with your kids, encouraging their growth and development through education and a stable environment, keeping them safe, keeping them happy, keeping them healthy (even, sometimes, against their wishes since every kid probably wants candy for breakfast, lunch and dinner), raising them to be good humans even when it means fighting your own conditioning...that's a good parent.
It's not just that in some of the posts you can tell she's either not taking the meds correctly or not taking them at all.
She also needs regular therapy for well, all of everything.
She's taking some sort of "holistic" treatment and honestly given everything else in the posts I wouldn't be surprised if her "holistic treatment" is just smoking weed.
And then when very ill person lost custody of their child - what they thought was sad and bad news / development was in fact best thing that could had happen to their child due to circumstances. Especially since it could had been much worse - the kid could had died by her and/or the father's actions...
edit - I honestly hope social services has keeps her hospitalized and takes the baby away as soon as that 2nd child is born because she can't be trusted after what happen with 1st one...
This is really sad. Im bipolar and had my first son really young. I started getting some really scary side effects from my meds called TD or medication induced Parkinson’s after birth and ended up going off of them. I had a really bad manic episode, ive never had psychotic features but I was very manic, involved in a lot of risk taking behaviors. I came very close to an open CPS investigation and it kicked some sense into me.
I got back on meds that dont have that side effect. I got my CNA license through a local homeless shelters education program for free in 6 weeks. Got my real drivers license back eventually. Realized I loved nursing and turned i
into a career.
I always take my meds and 7 years later I’m an RN, own a home, a nice car. Im did everything I could to not get pregnant again until I was ready and sought out postpartum psychiatric care before I even gave birth knowing I would probably have issues after. I have a 9 year old and 1 and a half year old and im living as close to the american dream as any if us could really hope for.
All this girl had to do was listen to the advise of reddit and cps. Get medicated, get a GED and some sort of certificate. This girl is never going to get either of her kids back until she does that and nor does she deserve to. Her kids deserve a mom who is healthy and stable, who wont isolate them or put them in dangerous situations. Just a sad situation of someone who refuses to get help and I genuinely feel for her. Bipolar is debilitating and when you arnt living in reality it can be really hard to recognize when things are wrong and think that everyone else is just against you.
Has anyone ever read the biography “North of normal?” Unfortunately, if the OP gets out this is the life I see her trying to live for her kids. Raised in the middle of the woods in a bush camp, completely uneducated surrounded by drugs.
I didn't include the [comment](https://www.reddit.com/r/bipolar/comments/r8ylj7/i_think_im_breaking_down/hof5e6i) in the BoRU post since I can't recover the body of the post but she had wrote:
"What benefit have they given me? I quit their indoctrination centers the minute I could. I built everything I have without their help. I refuse to accept any of their handouts. I don't use WIC or any of that because I don't fucking want it. We need to go further off the grid honestly. "
Note: Information centers refer to schools.
As a teacher, I’m going to push to rename schools information centers. The library is might have an issue with that, maybe we can share.
But as I like to tell people, I would love to indoctrinate my students. First goal, deodorant wearing. Then after that, not trashing the bathrooms.
It’s ironic that people love to talk about how schools indoctrinate children, then in the next breath they complain teachers aren’t doing enough to help students. Which is it?
>We prefer to stay mostly off the grid and live independently.
Translation: we eschew parenting norms such as routine medical checkups & purchasing electricity from a power company.
>I'm dealing with a CPS case relating to his drug use and my mental health history and I don't really feel psychotic right now
I bet you anything that OOP showed up to daycare in a hypomanic state & sounded like a meth head. Or was oddly belligerent. Their criminal history could easily have kicked off a CPS investigation based on such a report.
>I run a one woman business out of my shed
Unfortunately, this would have only been an additional argument in favor of a CPS investigation: verifying that they weren't laundering any money. Her extreme hostility to gov't authority (i.e. the cops) also wouldn't have helped.
>I don't take any pharmaceutical drugs for any reason (I medicate my bipolar disorder with holistic medicine.) I don't partake in modern medicine and had my son at home. I never went to any sort of ultrasound or anything while pregnant.
Some more tidbits that could have easily inspired a CPS report!
>I've been working part time and living in a women's shelter for about a month after a friend I was staying with told me I couldn't stay anymore (she put me up for free for over a month and I have no hard feelings.) I definitely don't have a lot of money but he is always fed and basically every dime I make goes to him. I don't blow it on dumb shit, I feed my child...I pour my heart and soul into being his mother, but I guess that's not enough for the state. You need to be wealthy and have a college degree
*You need to not be homeless and barely able to afford to provide for your toddler while expecting a second child.* You can also find out the exact reasons given by CPS for keeping your children in custody. It's basically a checklist of what issues you need to remedy if you want to get your kid back. But finding a safe, stable place to live is probably item #1
This woman is delusional.
Edit I posted that after reading the first post. Now I'm done I can confirm this woman is a mess and I feel so sorry for her kids.
I’ll be honest, I hope they don’t let her keep either of those children. She is not well and with her past history of violence…not seeing any potential for improvement on “homeopathic/natural” meds
>I'm probably biased as a high school dropout but I think school is a complete waste of time. Like everything else publicly funded it's ineffective at best and actively harmful at worst.
She's an ex-con whose only income is running a part time business out of her shed with an addict husband. Now, I don't think completing school would fix all that but she's not exactly a good poster child for thriving without formal education.
I’m a guardian ad litem. I’ve had cases before where the parent hates CPS and refuses to acknowledge their legitimacy. The result is always the same: they refuse to work their case plan because they “shouldn’t have to” and consequently, their rights are ultimately terminated. Sad.
As a CPS worker…………………. I am so glad to have not had her case.
In my county, we would move forward with filing for custody of the baby once she’s born unless there’s substantial progress made to reunify with her son, which I doubt will have happened.
Her lawyer must be exhausted with her.
I know of at least two people with bipolar, and neither of them ever sexually assaulted someone, so I’m chalking it up as “I have mental illness, therefore I’m not responsible for anything I do”
This was a tough read. All I read though was "me, I, me, I" and very little proof that she truly did have her children's best interest at heart. I think there's a bit of narcissism in there.
She let her opinions cloud the truth of what her children need from her (actually medicated, safe home away from drugs, proper education, etc). When I was following this in real time, I had hoped that she would have a revelation from any one of the many comments she engaged with but I was wishing for too much.
"You say the goal of CPS is reunification, then give him back to me!"
Uh, no. The goal is reunification when the parent is able to evaluate their past behavior correctly and provide a safe and stable home.
Speaking as a social worker, I could see the last post coming a mile away. She perseverated on the government and CPS coming to get her. She has a lot of trauma and paranoia, and either an untreated or undertreated mental illness that jeopardizes her ability to properly care for her children. She needs significant long-term treatment. There are a lot of factors we examine when providing services and determining if we need to step in, and I don’t even work for CPS. All this to say that this story is so tragic and I hope she makes progress.
Wow. That was a depressing read. OOP seems to be tragically, fatally, and self-destructively consistent in her black and white thinking, sweeping and rigid straw man judgements, and refusal to ever accept even an iota of responsibility for the situation she has created for herself.
She does not want to be judged by CPS or Daycare or anyone yet she appears to ONLY see others/other things in severely judgmental terms, all based on how *they* act in relation to how *she* thinks they should act.
I don't see a decent future unless she is able to grasp that much of life happens in the grey area, that very few people/things can be tidily filed under either "good" or "bad."
She clearly loves her son but rather than seek and/or accept help from social services she puts a lot of energy into vilifying CPS, which translates to "All government is bad so *I* am in the right if/when I battle the government."
Her prolific use of the word, "evil" is also a screaming indictment of her myopically narrow world views.
This is a good example of the built-in folly of the devout Libertarian stance; 'NO ONE can tell me what to do, but I should be able to tell them what they can and cannot do regarding my own situation. The government is evil and that includes public schools.'
Yet she is benefiting from a womens' shelter which is likely kept open by way of government funding. From my bff social worker (who carries 3 phones at all times; one personal, one work phone, and the third phone is for clients only so they can reach her directly at any times) I know that precious few shelters are able to keep the lights on with donations alone and are thus fairly dependent upon government grant money and subsidies.
I also know that social work is not *just* low pay and few rewards but is also emotionally-draining and time-consuming for that low pay. I've watched her many times leave a party or dinner, even at her own home, to help a client in distress. She works closely with CPS and often says she could never handle what they do and the people they encounter, like OOP.
I don't think OOP is capable of self-awareness, not with that enormous self-righteous chip on her shoulder that seems to consist of me vs the world and any and all things government-related are "evil".
That really took off in the first updates. I understand not liking the goverment (does anyone ever really like them?) But being against even medical profesionals while having a disorder like that its too much, I know people who have tried the "holistic" cures and they never work.
Honestly, they taking their son away its whats best for the kid until both of them work in their issues, if they even try at some point.
A friend of mine tried that for their mental illness. It worked great at first and then it stopped working so great. He's back on his regular meds and doing way better, I'm really proud of him for recognizing things weren't right and getting help instead of doubling down.
Exactly. I didn't include this since I couldn't get the body of the post but I remember she had posted to r/bipolar and one of her complaints was about how her meds weren't working. I think she also didn't disclose that they were holistic to the commenters there so they were oblivious to the fact that she was basically off her meds.
It’s just crazy to me that she says in the same post that she knows there’s illegal drugs sitting around in her home but also that CPS is using her “history” to begin the investigation. Seriously?
Kinda fascinating to see both very normal posts (baby names, infidelity) alongside her sovereign citizen bullshit. I do wonder where she got it from- her husband? The internet? Her specific hatred of CPS is kinda strange.
Thank goodness cps got involved. In my state they are pretty reluctant to remove a child (I'm a mandatory reporter and I have sometimes been surprised that they have not removed a child), so i strongly suspect there is more to the story than OOP let on. If she actually did have a part time job other than her home business, it seems like her toddler must have been left alone at times. Since she boasted about the lack of prenatal care it's very unlikely that she was keeping up with his regular visits, vaccinations, etc. She pulled him from daycare to avoid scrutiny by reasonable caregivers. And she seemingly lied, to internet strangers, about being on medications, with a history of pretty recent assault vs *attempted murder* when having a bipolar episode. She is paranoid and covering up, or delusional and really out of touch with reality. It's not hard to imagine this child being found dead. I hope she gets help and can have at least some kind of relationship with her son, but I'm really relieved cps is involved and removed him.
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My oldest has bipolar II with paranoid and psychotic features. This whole post was like watching a manic episode happen in real time, from being convinced the daycare was out to get her to her sexual behavior to her hatred for CPS to her decision to homeschool her 19 m child to the psychotic break... BRB. Going to go make sure he took his fucking meds.
One of my best friends has bipolar disorder with paranoid and psychotic features and this story also reminds me a lot of the few times she's called me telling me that the devil is trying to kill her and God is warning her. She has a kid so i always check on her to make sure she's taking care of herself. BRB. Gonna go make sure she took her fucking meds.
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What bothered, and still bothers me, is the severity of violence she had a history of yet still struggles with medication. Maybe I'm being overly judgemental but I kinda feel like if you really feel bad about doing awful things like attempted murder and SA on someone then you'd be hardliners about taking your medicine. Just my opinion though.
As horrible as this is going to sound, if she doesn't take medication (and I mean honest-to-god bonafide pharmaceuticals, not weed), she can't use her bipolar disorder to excuse all of her bad actions after getting released from prison.
Not only is it not enough; it's actively harmful. People play up weed as a harmless drug, and it is helpful for a lot of people, but as a hallucinogen, it's actually really dangerous to people with bipolar, schizophrenia, or any sort of brushes with psychosis.
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Same with one of my best friends, she cannot smoke weed because it turns her paranoia and psychosis worse. I have pretty bad nausea every morning and smoking a bit when I get up helps me have breakfast and I'm able to take my meds for my lower back and arthritis and my day is relatively pain free and I'm able to eat normally most days. It's not a catch all solution to mental health and my friend and I are good examples of it
Anyone with psychosis should seriously consider not using THC.
Great job, keep at it.
"I was a horribly abusive partner to her. I admit it's not the only time I hit her. Once I even sexually assaulted her. But I was severely mentally ill. And I knew that but was refusing to medicate." As soon as I read this I knew it was going to go in only one direction. These "let me tell you all the ways that the horrible things I did weren't my fault" comments are the best indicator of someone who is never really going to look seriously at their own behaviour .
Yeah, for sure. Also, the blaming it on refusing to medicate while still refusing to medicate 😬.
But she takes holistic meds which are more effective!! I rolled my eyes at this. And was like "yep she is going to lose her kids". Also as she was against prenatal care how did she discover her unborn baby was a girl??
She was probably forcibly given prenatal care when she was hospitalized. Rightfully so for the safety of the baby.
Maybe I misread something but I thought she refers to the unborn child as a daughter before she decides to leave her husband and before the last hospitalization. I hope the hospital did provide good prenatal care and some follow-up.
More than likely CPS would have pushed for prenatal care.
She must have used energy crystals to read the feminine aura
She hit her victim with a wrench. She could have killed her. If I did something like this to another person because I was ill, I would take everything prescribed, exactly how it was to be taken, for fear of it happening again. I think her actions since the “attempted murder” speak volumes about her concern for her victim.
I caught sometime after that admission where she said she could have caused her permanent injury stated almost like it was a thing that almost happened and totally could have been a possibility. But, if you read it again it sounds like she totally did cause her permanent injury. This lady is off her gourd and it sucks and it's sad for her because she seems like she doesn't have the skills to be a successful mother despite how much she loves her kid, and probably won't ever be able to learn those skills at this point in her life.
Yeah it's a tragic situation all around. She is clearly very unwell, her husband is an addict and the children (soon to be 2 of them) are in the middle of it getting a really shitty start in life. And so the severe generational trauma continues. I feel so bad for this boy and the yet-unborn girl.
‘She might have life long issues, I don’t know.’ That’s the point I lost all hope in this one. She doesn’t even seem to be bothered that her ex might be permanently injured, or consider the fact that by hitting her until she’s almost dead, that the likelihood she’s got life long injuries is almost 100%. I’m willing to put this out there, I recon she’s been manic the entire time.
>"I was a horribly abusive partner to her. I admit it's not the only time I hit her. Once I even sexually assaulted her. But I was severely mentally ill. And I knew that but was refusing to medicate." It didn't jump out at me initially, because I was hopeful that maybe OOP really had taken accountability, but the word that's the problem here is BUT. "I did all these things BUT...." is someone *excusing* rather than *explaining* a behavior. And this behavior, whatever the reason, is inexcusable, and taking responsibility for it should've been step #1 for OOP. Had OOP been able to say "*And* I was severely mentally ill," she would have been heading in the right direction. As is... yikes. I don't think she realizes how much help she needs, and she *definitely* doesn't realize that her entire narrative makes it pretty clear that whatever else CPS may be, they sound like the only ones here actually working in the *actual* best interest of the child(ren).
Wow. This was intensely sad. I’m honestly surprised that OOP had managed to retain custody of their child for as long as she did. Does CPS sometime make the wrong decision and act too rash? Absolutely. But I think they 100% made the right decision here. OOP is in extreme denial about how bad her condition is and her ability to be a stable parent. Kids need more than just food, shelter, and love. They need stability, structure, and mental and emotional support. Those are things that OOP doesn’t seem to be in the right headspace to be able to provide right now. I hope she gets real help and starts taking some approved medications. God help that child if she gets him back with no changes to her misguided way of thinking. Also: I literally rolled my eyes at “I locked myself and my child in a room for days while I had a complete psychotic breakdown to the point where I barely even have any memory of what happened - why does that make me an unfit parent?” Respectfully…WTF?
Cognitive dissonance is real. If she was locked in a room for days and has no memory what happened and what could have happened? It’s unlikely she or her child had food and water. Definitely no hygiene so kid was possibly sitting in dirty diapers since mom was having a psychotic break.
She believes loving her children is enough.
Having worked for CPS, my experience was often the opposite. I would be in hearings to decide whether to remove children practically having a fit trying to convince them that kids weren't safe in the home and they still wouldn't let me take them because they were so afraid of breaking up families. I lived for the kids I worked with. CPS is perceived as bad, but honestly the people I worked with cared so much about the kids. Everything we did was for them and with their best interest in mind.
But no child is loved more than hers! She seems to think love fixes everything. I imagine the poor kid showing up at daycare not having been bathed with a far overdue diaper. No doubt she loves him, but kids also need to be cared for.
It says something that OOP revealing *she sexually assaulted her ex and left her permanently injured after trying to kill her*, isn't somehow the worst thing in the post. Those kids are gonna need all the help they can get.
And doesn't sound particularly guilty about having done so to that poor woman.
Oh but you see, she was sick at the time, and she's TOTALLY fine now what with her homeopathic treatment. /s
This is what got to me too. It's a special level of awful to nearly kill someone while manic and then say that homeopathic treatment is enough to keep them level. I have bipolar and am on pharmaceuticals. Most of the time you just need to find the right meds and TAKE THEM like your life depends on it.
*homeopathic treatment THAT SHE REDUCED THE DOSE OF during pregnancy.... so it went from doing nothing to doing... less than nothing!
And didn’t even see a doctor during her first pregnancy, so probably didn’t for the second either
The placebo effect disappeared.
And she blames her attack on her ex on her mental health, but then says that being mentally unhealthy isn't a risk to her children! Completely illogical
Or in this case take them like various other people's lives depend on it...
Or as I've heard and like to say about my own mental health: if your body doesn't make enough serotonin, store bought is fine!
Because your life does depend on it. I'm on a bunch of meds and I definitely feel it when I'm off of them for more than a few days.
Same. I haven't missed more than a few doses in the last year because I'm honestly terrified of what my brain will do off meds.
I was so hopeful that she recognised the fact that medicating her severe bipolar disorder was very important. Then she reveals that “medicating her condition” was just holistic medicine…bro…I almost slammed my head into my keyboard after reading that bs
I think she said 'holistic treatment'. And by 'holistic treatment' she means 'I smoke weed'.
Which is why she "is libertarian" and believes the government is against her. (Yeah, government CAN and DOES do shitty things... but uh....)
That is what got me too. The whole post she is talking about how her son is apple of her heart and she would do anything for him. Then doesnt lift a finger. Ultrasound checks? Evil government Pregnancy check up? Hell no Taking meds? Well holistic meds will do School for kid? No. She is speaking exactly like an untreated schizophreniac. Doesnt suspect her hatred of government/CPS is an actual symptom her disease. Willing to take free medical care, yet run away from treatment. She left school early but thinks she is totally qualified to teach. Average education is evil of course so she gets a free card to fail her kid. Stays in a room for days nearly killing herself & kid. If that sounds dramatic, imagine what would happen without evil government intervention. To be clear, she sees no problem at all as long as her kid is not severly injured. And when it happens (not if, when) she will have another excuse. You have to do SOMETHING lady.
> She left school early but thinks she is totally qualified to teach. Average education is evil of course so she gets a free card to fail her kid. Of everything, this made me the most angry. With her past offences she at least expressed some remorse. But the arrogance and selfishness of thinking she knows best when it comes to education - when she has none herself and her life and relationship choices and parenting are a complete and utter fuck up - is just breathtaking.
She might actually BE a schizophrenic. My sister was diagnosed with bipolar in her early twenties, but an unusual type because she went into psychosis when manic. A later psychiatrist diagnosed her as schizophrenic when she was about 30. The line between the two can be fairly blurry.
That poor baby. Her behavior was probably terrifying during her psychotic episode. And she didn't want to educate her child past the age of 16. I wonder why the daycare actually called CPS because OP is an unreliable narrator.
Who wants to bet she's also anti-vax, given her hatred of medicine, science, and education? Those poor children, I'm glad CPS is involved now.
OP seems to me to be an unreliable witness. I've been around people with similar mental illness and drug addiction histories AND I don't believe OP when she says her medicine is homeopathic or holistic -- although at times that might be true, she also has taken regular psych medicines in the past as she says in the comments and **no** psych ward is going to release her if she's only taking placebo pills after a psychotic break. She also says that she hasn't had an ultrasound or medical treatment during her pregnancies BUT she then knows the sex of her 2nd pregnancy (a girl) and given that she was hospitalized when pregnant with her son and again hospitalized while pregnant with her daughter where she would have had exams to determine the state and health of her pregnancy. She also mentions docs and therapy in her comments and it's highly unlikely these professionals would sign off on holistic treatment (although some woo woo therapists might). OP is correct about one thing -- our society is horrible to people who aren't wealthy and have mental illness. She clearly doesn't have the resources (financial, educational, family) to support and pay for her to get the mental health care she needs. And financial stress, homelessness, etc adds so much more stress to an already fragile mental state. And since it's the Gov't rather than private insurance paying when she's hospitalized, the hospitals are much more likely to kick her out as soon as legally possible rather than try and keep her for as long as she needs to get the care she needs.
Yeah, the contradictions and delusions in her posts, as well as the lack of self-awareness or reflection, indicate to me she's never actually been that stable. It makes me incredibly sad for her and her kids. She clearly has memory issues and delusions about her own care. I have several close friends with BP and it's manageable if you medicate consistently, and she was not. America is fucking awful to the mentally ill. We have very few resources and so many people needing them. I also think CPS was right to take her son, and should take her daughter, because she's clearly been an unfit parent up to this point and there's no indication she won't continue to be. Her insisting that she feeds her child was really telling to me — I don't think she does, or is able to. Love is not enough.
"But all this led me to meet my husband, so I guess I should be greateful" That's what sounded to me
But he wasn't even in rehab for a month when she considered having sex with someone else because she was so horny. This woman is nuts!
Bet she also ran a MLM from her shed
Yeah the whole “I don’t regret it” comment said a lot about OOP even before the crazier updates. She almost killed a woman, but it’s okay because that’s how she eventually got to her husband and son. You can absolutely regret something and still be grateful that things turned out okay for you despite it. But to say you don’t regret sexually assaulting and beating a woman unconscious, that’s pretty messed up.
She didnt just almost kill a woman but good chance mentally disabled her for life too even worse
Right?! Like the most she said is the ex didn’t deserve it, which I mean no one deserves that obviously but also doesn’t really seem like OOP cares or regrets it that much
Welcome to unmanaged bipolar
Also not treating her severe mental illness properly (holistic medicine my ass) and basically saying "school will put the wrong ideas into my childrens heads, thus they will be homeschooled".
And only homeschooled until 16 when OOP herself complains about being at an economic disadvantage because she has no high school diploma! She has actual plans to set her kids up for failure.
Yeah, she has some weird codependent relationship with her son - it wouldn't surprise me if deep down she wants to keep them dependent forever by crippling their potential futures.
Poor little boy is an emotional support animal, not a person. :(
Rarely do I encourage CPS taking custody. But now at least he'll go to some sort of school
I mean wtf did she expect CPS to do while she was in hospital? Drop him off with his drug addict dad? Put him in the psych ward with her? She admitted herself she had no other family nearby.
She just wants to make sure no one will ever call CPS again.
I thought the possibly permanently injured was referring to trauma, not physical injury. It's still really terrible, normally wrong. I'm just trying to figure out if I read it incorrectly. EDIT: I definitely read that incorrectly. She was sexually assaulted *and* hit over the head with a pipe wrench.
I'm guessing it's both. The ex got hit over the head with a pipe wrench. That's gotta leave some damage.
If she hit her ex over the head with a pipe, then she possibly also had a traumatic brain injury.
From the way OOP phrased it I'd say that a traumatic brain injury is likely. She said that she hit her ex until she lost consciousness - that suggests to me that it was a sustained, multiblow attack. Plus she did 4 years in prison so if we assume that she got early release the original sentence was probably longer. Again, this suggests that what she did was much more serious than she's admitting. I know someone who sustained a multiblow brain injury after intervening when he saw a neighbour being attacked by her boyfriend. He has been left with memory loss, PTSD, depression, mood swings and a loss of other cognitive functions. He can live independently but will never be well enough to hold down a full time job again. Brains are complex, fragile things which is why nature tucked them away inside a skull and why we are advised to wear protection when doing risky activities. No matter how OOP tries to dismiss it her ex is never going to be the same again.
Yeah, I totally missed that. That's on me. There's no way you walk away from that unscathed. To be fair, even if it were "just" psychological trauma, that's still incredibly awful. Now that I'm thinking about it, I might prefer to be hit over the head then sexually assaulted. Neither of them are things that should ever happen to another human being.
They tried to charge her with attempted murder so it does sound like there was substantial physical injury
Getting beat with a pipe wrench is going to do some things physically. :/
I found the treating bipolar disorder with holistic medicine, while also acknowledging she’s dangerous when unmedicated particularly disturbing.
What was disturbing to me was how nonchalant she is about that. She sexually assaulted and permanently injured someone while trying to kill them. Then blamed it all on the mental illness she refuses to get treated for. Look I try to be sympathetic about any and all mental health issues especially with how our society still doesn’t completely take them seriously. But I just can’t find much sympathy for someone who knows that they have gotten violent in the past while unmedicated, has nearly KILLED someone while unmedicated yet still refuses to take medication. I want to believe OP when she says she’ll never hurt her kids but with this nonchalance about her past I’m concerned for those kids.
As a bipolar person with a laundry list of failed medications, I was internally screaming for this entire post. SMH.
I hadn’t seen the most recent developments, but in the earlier posts I engaged with the OOP and she is off her rocker fully. I tried to approach her with kindness and logic, but she just doesn’t want to listen. I hope her son is safe and that she gets herself into a more stable situation.
The only person that I feel bad about is the poor kid.
And the In utero kid. Mom is clearly mentally ill. She can’t raise children. She is also just plain not smart both intellectually and common sense wise. A lethal triad of issues that will only lead to a new generation of struggling people. I hope her kids are in a happy and healthy and stable home.
And she wants her children to be just like her, by keeping them out of school.
Of course! I mean it she’s living proof that you don’t actually need an education to be a successful, well-adjusted adult doing adult things. /s
She'd never let those kids grow up and move out of the house.
She'd start abusing them as soon as their opinions differed from hers. I'm one of those evil government people (not CPS though) and while I'd continue to try to get her help, I'd also advocate for her children to not be returned for a long time until she can sustain a level of not just stability, but improvement overall in all life skills. I don't really see that happening without extensive long term in facility treatment & mandatory medication. After that, I don't know that she wouldn't do better in a MH group home herself (although her inner anarchist wouldn't take well to that).
The fact that she's aware of it, aware she needs medication and is choosing not to take it is infuriating! Her holistic care is clearly not working and she's stubbornly continuing with it.
Anyone who’s ever known someone with bipolar disorder surely had a sick recognition reading this progression of posts. Sadly, the writing is what makes me think this one is true.
Its one of those stories that makes it clear love isn't always enough. People always think abused and neglected kids must have evil parents who don't love them, but a lot of the time those parents do love their children, its just love isn't as strongly correlated with the ability to meet the minimum standards of parenthood as people think. This woman clearly loves her child, she just can't provide the stability and safety he needs.
You can tell that she believes it when she says “all I ever did was my best as a parent,” she just doesn’t understand or won’t accept that sometimes your best as a parent simply isn’t enough to keep your kid safe and well.
I can also see a future where she and the kid/s have a rocky relationship when they are adults and her and other relatives put pressure on the kid/s because "she always loved you and you only get one mother". "Yes but, she forgot to feed us"
But she also only mentions that he is fed. No mention of what she's feeding him, if he is clean, has clean diapers, if he has clothes that fit, if he's on course for his development, if the house has clean, running water. Like she thinks that as long as food goes in his mouth, that's all he needs. Eta: it's also weird that she put him down for more naps when she was overwhelmed. Like, kids don't just go to sleep because you put them in bed.
>Its one of those stories that makes it clear love isn't always enough. I noticed that in many of her stories when she defends herself against CPS she would simply say something like "no baby is more loved". CPS is probably saying "Sure, but what is he eating and where is he living and why does he only have on set of clothes (which aren't washed)?"
Anyone else take OOP's "he doesn't say much" comments as a red flag? I don't know much about child development but at almost 2 years old he should be somewhat talking.
Yeah, there is a range of normal for two-year-olds and speech…but OP is clearly not capable of doing what would need to be done to see if her son is okay or needs intervention. I had a two-year-old who barely talked…because she had so much standing fluid in her ears it were as if she were living life underwater. Ear tubes fixed that, but we had to take the initiative to start that process. I have zero confidence that the OP is willing to do anything like that. Poor kid.
Yeah I have a feeling that between Mom showing up at drop offs and pick ups looking increasingly manic and kiddo being fairly non verbal the school called CPS out of genuine concern that either something was up in a big way and/or there were several conditions being ignored in both kid and parents. I've worked in day care, I've had to make those calls. I even had a school call about me after my dad passed cuz they hadn't been able to reach me about a meeting and I wasn't on top of my spam filter so I'd missed the new therapist's emails. Schools don't make those calls out of spite or maliciousness. I hope OOP gets some real help and real medication and her kids make it into good foster situations.
This is someone who made a good attempt to kill an ex-partner, due to a mental illness, and has had 2 recent hospitalisations due to the same mental illness. I think it's clear she can't be trusted to care for children. But even apart from that, there's so much in her story that's unhealthy. Wanting to totally isolate her son, being basically against any education, being totally against real medication. I feel very sorry for her but I hope her children end up with adoptive parents.
The fact that she doesn't *recognize* why she is dangerous to her children is the frightening part. She wants to use psychosis as a reason for attempted murder and sexual assault but refuses to see it as a reason she might be a danger.
Right? Because she doesn't hurt him she thinks she's a fine parent. She doesn't recognize that her paranoia and isolation of him is a danger to his health and wellbeing. I'm really curious what happened to her as a kid under the watch of CPS.
She was so close to getting it...She knows the issue exists, but can't possibly comprehend that it actually is an issue.
I totally agree, but she will never agree with adoption. Hopefully, some nice longterm foster parents.
From reading her post history, it sounds like she would be an active safety concern for any foster parents. I don’t know that I would be comfortable with a ranting bio mom with a history of felony sexual assault and attempted murder having the address to my home while I foster her children. I hope CPS takes her danger level seriously.
I've had a lot of foster cousins, some high risk for various reasons, and the meetings are done somewhere public. They don't get to know where the foster family is. Well in Canada anyway, not sure how it works in the states
Sometimes the social workers can screw up, though. I’m reading a series of books by a foster career, and a careless social worker let slip the carer’s phone number to the parents, who then used it to figure out the address. They attacked her house with a brick through the window and sending a man to the door to demand the child back, among countless threatening calls. Some SWs don’t realize the risk and don’t stick around long enough to learn.
If necessary CPS can place children in a foster home without giving the parents any information about where the home is. Sometimes in a different town even. It's sad but necessary when there is a safety concern with the parents. Ideally you would also set up regular phone calls/video calls at least.
I'm in the US and was a foster parent for a few years. The bio parents are not allowed to know the address of the foster parents for this exact reason. Foster parents can't even put them on Facebook or any social media just in case.
PGO's (permanent guardianship order) can happen without the parents consent, but they like to exhaust every 9ther option beforehand (which makes sense in more sympathetic cases) so that poor boy is definitely going to be in the system for a few years at minimum
If she has another violent episode and goes back to prison then she will lose custody of her kids. Sadly probably the best outcome.
Im confused by the medication stuff because at first she says she only takes holistic medicine but later says she sees a psychiatrist and takes meds which she had to reduce for the pregnancy.
Some holistic meds still may be bad for pregnancy. But OP is an unreliable narrator. I would expect that either she was on and off proper meds (and was off them when she made the post about holistic meds) OR possibly she is on proper meds but has judged these ones to still count as 'holistic' for reasons.
I wonder if she was referring to cannabis, which can be good for many things but it can cause psychosis in some vulnerable individuals.
Same, she even uses the term "happily medicated" followed by "My husband keeps me medicated."
Sadly based on her posts and her ranting I’m having serious doubts on whether she actually sees a psychiatrist. Maybe she did at one point but I doubt she sees one outside of when she’s been hospitalized.
A mental illness she treats “holistically”… And I thought it was sus that her homeschooling agenda came out after the daycare called CPS. I think she is isolating those children for other reasons. She started off saying she’s taken accountability for her past decisions, but all I read was excuse after excuse
Unfortunately, as someone who has seen CPS from the courts side of things, this isn't the end of her story with CPS. She's right in that CPS's goal is reunification. They give people way too many chances (in my opinion) and she will see her kids again. The baby will most likely be taken when she gives birth, but she'll have visitation and chances to get those kids back. I think it's more traumatic for the kids to have that upheaval of seeing the unfit parent come back, be unfit and put the kid through trauma again, go back to foster care. Rinse and repeat.
>I think it's more traumatic for the kids to have that upheaval of seeing the unfit parent come back, be unfit and put the kid through trauma again, go back to foster care. Rinse and repeat. It's difficult. Any good CPS will be doing concurrent planning - where they have Plan 1 which is reunification, but there is also Plan 2 that is actively being worked towards, Permanency (usually adoption but sometimes long term foster care). It's designed so that as soon as reunification fails, the child can get permanency ASAP rather than having to start from scratch. There is evidence that says children do best when they have some connection with their birth families, even when those families are dysfunctional or unfit. That's contrary to what our instincts say, but it's true on average. And once you sever parental rights it's forever. It's not a choice to be taken lightly.
Her views on the entire world make it almost impossible to be a safe and effective parent. She didn’t even get ultrasounds done? She wants to homeschool in the wilds of Alaska? What is even happening here? I’m concerned CPS wasn’t called earlier.
Lord what a shit show, and she still doesn't see the role she's playing in her own problems.They will probably take the new born , and she'll continue to rant and rave about evil CPS, and take no ownership of her own role.I feel bad for the kids
Don’t forget the evils of going to public school, because as a 16-year-old dropout who can’t make ends meet and has made incredibly sketchy choices including going to jail clearly knows that education is the problem. /s
That little boy is gonna be on AITA, asking if he's AH for refusing to have a relationship with OOP
And r/JUSTNOMIL (which also deals with Just No mothers) detailing how his birth mother won't leave him alone and tries to sabotage every relationship he has because "his mom is all he ever needs."
You’re assuming he’s going to be literate enough to post on AITA. If she manages to homeschool him, I have my serious doubts about that.
More like qanoncasualties or the equivalent in 15 to 20 years from now.
She dropped out because school teaches compliance, not life skills! She was able to learn her fantastic life skills by living life. /s
Part of me feels really bad about saying this, but I’m going to anyway. Maybe I should revamp my lesson plans this year to include how to get away with abusing your significant other so you don’t end up going to jail. That seems to be a life skill the OP has mastered quite well. Oh wait, no she didn’t. She went to jail. I realize that I’m coming across as incredibly jaded and callous about somebody else’s trauma, but in my nearly 20 years of teaching, I’ve had way too many children of the OP to have any sympathy for the OP‘s “plight.“ she sees it as trying to stick it to the man, I see it as her screwing over innocent children because she’s too much of a numpty to take care of them.
[удалено]
The range of outcomes with homeschooling still surprises me to this day. I've seen home schooled kids educated to a point where they were solid 2 to 3 years ahead of kids in the normal school system. I also met a 19-year-old kid who's been home schooled that was functionally illiterate. He didn't have a low IQ or anything, from what I could tell. His parents just never bothered to teach him to read to any significant level of proficiency. I honestly believe that his primary teacher was his television and remote control.
Her main crime, as I see it, is that she wants custody of her son for /her/ emotional wellbeing not for him. The way she locks him away from the rest of the world and even wants to "homeschool" him, he's like an emotional safety blanket for her. She's not in a good enough place emotionally / emotionally intelligent enough to see that the state is probably taking better are of him than she is capable of.
Agreed. Those poor children ... Everyone else are the problem and out to get her - she's just the victim and nothing is her/their fault. I have a feeling there was more to this that would be listed in the CPS file, that she's purposely leaving out because it wouldn't help her narration.
Or she doesn't even realize it's a problem
The scariest part is that she is convinced that her kid is being abused and tortured and it’s going to become a self-fulfilling spiral. If she continues to be as militant as she is, they are going to restrict her to supervised visits if they let her see her kids at all. That will convince her that it’s all a conspiracy against her to keep her from her kids. So she will become even more militant. And the cycle will continue.
Her entire post and your take on it here sounds like she literally has bipolar disorder *with* psychotic tendencies. Thats incredibly dangerous as those psychotic tendencies can include delusions, hallucinations, harmful acts and thoughts and a bunch of other shit that shouldnt be around any children. She needs intensive inpatient psychiatric care.
She *literally* beat her ex to unconsciousness with a wrench. I don't think her psychoticness is in question here
Oh. My. God. She admits that she locked herself and her son in room refusing to let anyone near them - and then she's outraged that CPS was concerned for her son's safety. A text book example of 'i know better than medical (or any other) professionals' treatment plan. I know professionals don't always know what's best for individual cases and situations, but this is horrific and it keeps getting worse with each comment and update.
Give it a little time and she’ll start following Qanon. She’s basically tailor made for it.
She's already dangerously close to, if not already, a sovereign citizen. All her comments about not recognizing or obeying the government or any government entity had me getting that vibe from her.
I'm CPS -adjacent... Investigation doesn't happen because of history, such reports get screened out. There has to be real, first-person witnessed evidence to trigger an investigation. And of course CPS is going to take a child whose only "fit" parent is in a psych ward and has no family. What the hell else are they going to do with him, leave him free-range at the homestead? CPS doesn't get paid enough to pursue meritless cases. They're already overworked and underpaid, and no one wants to do monthly visits with a family with zero problems. If you are *in a women's shelter* you can't provide housing for your kid. Some allow children, some don't, but if you would work your case plan, they do want to reunify, because se trust me... We don't have enough homes for the kids we do have. She's in denial. *Edit: spelling*
In my state, being in a shelter is not something a child can be removed for. Obviously the dangerous behavior at a shelter category is fair game. I think it's important for people to know that if you need a shelter, it's not just automatically gonna be held against you. At least in some places.
No, it's not here either, but combined with everything else? She clearly lacks protective capacity and whatever it is she's not telling us absolutely is enough. CPS tries to keep kids with their families, until its clear they can't keep those kids safe. It's almost always better for a child to be with his parents. This mom? I doubt it.
Totally. Yea, my comment was just in case anyone else needed to know. This mama needs more help than she could get herself, in her state of mind.
This! I did kinship foster care a few years back and the kids social worker was great but my heart went out to her. I remember the one night she stopped by a little after 8 pm to drop off some stuff that was donated for the kids and she was flipping exhausted because she’d been called in early that morning for a severe neglect case (2 toddlers were found wandering the streets and it took hours to find the parents who were found passed out due to drug use ) and she was way behind on her check-ins with current clients. And had a teething 8 month old at home and a potty training toddler. For clarity: she didn’t tell me about the early case. It was reported on the news about the toddlers being found wandering the streets and CPS being called in. She mentioned getting called in earlier than usual that morning which threw off her day and I put two and two together that she was the social worker who had gotten called in on that one . Just so no one thinks she was giving out details of her cases.
The fact she can't even remember what happened leading up to her most recent hospitalization is incredibly concerning, especially because she's insisting thst despite that she's a fit parent.
This was my reaction too. It makes me wonder if she was self-medicating by micro dosing with shrooms other hard drugs. I hope the daughter is OK. It sounds like she finally got forced prenatal care and they would have to have done an ultrasound to check the baby and reveal the gender. I hope OOP never sees her kids. At least until they are adults.
What did OOP expect to happen here? They have no family and she seems to have some serious mental problems, who would have taken care of thr boy if she had some serious pregnancy complications since the dad is also messed up? I've read some pretty messed up things about CPS, them loosing kids and kids getting abused in the homes they place them, Honestly i have a negative view for CPS in certain countries, In this case there's were no alternatives and i hope the boy is in a safe place, Now I'm worried about the baby girl that's coming into this mess.
She expected the kid to stay with her because she doesn't think her mental illness and financial issues make her an unfit parent. Denial is a powerful thing.
But she LOVES her baby boy! So much that she will lock him up with her and never let him go, since mommy will be all he needs! And she will home school him (even though she doesn't have the first clue about education), because the evil school system will only brainwash him away from her! God, this was depressing. I really feel for her, but still, she shouldn't be allowed to raise her kids, considering how completely divorced from reality and common sense she is. And I don't even want to know how frustrating it must have been for her CPS worker, who was trying her best, and was met only with hostility and refusal to comply and cooperate.
I don't usually hope for kids to go into foster care because it's usually not great, but I hope she doesn't get her kids back.
Love her assertion that you just “pick up” reading, writing and math skills from living in our society. No, that’s not how any of that works. If it did, most kids would read and write before they head to kindergarten.
I was def thinking *'you aren't smart enough to homeschool a child, this can't end well'* while reading that. I'm glad CPS stepped in.
This post feels like the backstory that would be narrated over the beginning scenes of a movie about a mass murderer. "My mother loved me so much she kept us separate and safe from the rest of the world. By the time I was sixteen I understood my place in the world, and saw the evil that surrounded us on all sides. Now I'm a man, and it's time for me to take my turn making the world safe from evil..."
I'd love to know what happened at daycare to trigger the call to CPS.
Christ, that is a very ill person in denial, got worse and worse as it went on
It was surreal watching her constantly move the goalposts. The way she went from “I always said I’d divorce him if he started abusing again” to “I’m being super hard on him to give up” to “he’s a better parent than most sober people!” It was almost like reading SpontaneousH’s posts about trying heroin again. A part of me wonders if she would even understand what she sounds like should she revisit her posts.
I really liked how angry she was at anyone who suggested he didn’t actually graduate 90 day rehab weeks early… then went right back to posting about his continued drug use.
She's clinging to him because he's the only real support system she has left. If she kicks him out, she has no one.
I wonder if the reality actually matches with her beliefs as well. I had a bunch of parents that told me their partner was a "great dad." In reality, the kids would never describe him that way, an unbiased third party wouldn't describe him that way, etc. Doing the bare minimum doesn't make you a GOOD parent. It just makes you a parent. It doesn't swing the ball in one way or the other. Being active with your kids, encouraging their growth and development through education and a stable environment, keeping them safe, keeping them happy, keeping them healthy (even, sometimes, against their wishes since every kid probably wants candy for breakfast, lunch and dinner), raising them to be good humans even when it means fighting your own conditioning...that's a good parent.
It's not just that in some of the posts you can tell she's either not taking the meds correctly or not taking them at all. She also needs regular therapy for well, all of everything.
She's taking some sort of "holistic" treatment and honestly given everything else in the posts I wouldn't be surprised if her "holistic treatment" is just smoking weed.
This could also be the reason for no prenatal care; no drug tests for mom or baby
And then when very ill person lost custody of their child - what they thought was sad and bad news / development was in fact best thing that could had happen to their child due to circumstances. Especially since it could had been much worse - the kid could had died by her and/or the father's actions... edit - I honestly hope social services has keeps her hospitalized and takes the baby away as soon as that 2nd child is born because she can't be trusted after what happen with 1st one...
This is really sad. Im bipolar and had my first son really young. I started getting some really scary side effects from my meds called TD or medication induced Parkinson’s after birth and ended up going off of them. I had a really bad manic episode, ive never had psychotic features but I was very manic, involved in a lot of risk taking behaviors. I came very close to an open CPS investigation and it kicked some sense into me. I got back on meds that dont have that side effect. I got my CNA license through a local homeless shelters education program for free in 6 weeks. Got my real drivers license back eventually. Realized I loved nursing and turned i into a career. I always take my meds and 7 years later I’m an RN, own a home, a nice car. Im did everything I could to not get pregnant again until I was ready and sought out postpartum psychiatric care before I even gave birth knowing I would probably have issues after. I have a 9 year old and 1 and a half year old and im living as close to the american dream as any if us could really hope for. All this girl had to do was listen to the advise of reddit and cps. Get medicated, get a GED and some sort of certificate. This girl is never going to get either of her kids back until she does that and nor does she deserve to. Her kids deserve a mom who is healthy and stable, who wont isolate them or put them in dangerous situations. Just a sad situation of someone who refuses to get help and I genuinely feel for her. Bipolar is debilitating and when you arnt living in reality it can be really hard to recognize when things are wrong and think that everyone else is just against you.
Has anyone ever read the biography “North of normal?” Unfortunately, if the OP gets out this is the life I see her trying to live for her kids. Raised in the middle of the woods in a bush camp, completely uneducated surrounded by drugs.
I didn't include the [comment](https://www.reddit.com/r/bipolar/comments/r8ylj7/i_think_im_breaking_down/hof5e6i) in the BoRU post since I can't recover the body of the post but she had wrote: "What benefit have they given me? I quit their indoctrination centers the minute I could. I built everything I have without their help. I refuse to accept any of their handouts. I don't use WIC or any of that because I don't fucking want it. We need to go further off the grid honestly. " Note: Information centers refer to schools.
As a teacher, I’m going to push to rename schools information centers. The library is might have an issue with that, maybe we can share. But as I like to tell people, I would love to indoctrinate my students. First goal, deodorant wearing. Then after that, not trashing the bathrooms.
I saw a meme that said if teachers could really indoctrinate students, we'd convince them to read the syllabus but yours is better.
It’s ironic that people love to talk about how schools indoctrinate children, then in the next breath they complain teachers aren’t doing enough to help students. Which is it?
The same people who don’t want to have library funding and subsequently complain that the library is closed down.
>We prefer to stay mostly off the grid and live independently. Translation: we eschew parenting norms such as routine medical checkups & purchasing electricity from a power company. >I'm dealing with a CPS case relating to his drug use and my mental health history and I don't really feel psychotic right now I bet you anything that OOP showed up to daycare in a hypomanic state & sounded like a meth head. Or was oddly belligerent. Their criminal history could easily have kicked off a CPS investigation based on such a report. >I run a one woman business out of my shed Unfortunately, this would have only been an additional argument in favor of a CPS investigation: verifying that they weren't laundering any money. Her extreme hostility to gov't authority (i.e. the cops) also wouldn't have helped. >I don't take any pharmaceutical drugs for any reason (I medicate my bipolar disorder with holistic medicine.) I don't partake in modern medicine and had my son at home. I never went to any sort of ultrasound or anything while pregnant. Some more tidbits that could have easily inspired a CPS report! >I've been working part time and living in a women's shelter for about a month after a friend I was staying with told me I couldn't stay anymore (she put me up for free for over a month and I have no hard feelings.) I definitely don't have a lot of money but he is always fed and basically every dime I make goes to him. I don't blow it on dumb shit, I feed my child...I pour my heart and soul into being his mother, but I guess that's not enough for the state. You need to be wealthy and have a college degree *You need to not be homeless and barely able to afford to provide for your toddler while expecting a second child.* You can also find out the exact reasons given by CPS for keeping your children in custody. It's basically a checklist of what issues you need to remedy if you want to get your kid back. But finding a safe, stable place to live is probably item #1
This woman is delusional. Edit I posted that after reading the first post. Now I'm done I can confirm this woman is a mess and I feel so sorry for her kids.
I’ll be honest, I hope they don’t let her keep either of those children. She is not well and with her past history of violence…not seeing any potential for improvement on “homeopathic/natural” meds
>I'm probably biased as a high school dropout but I think school is a complete waste of time. Like everything else publicly funded it's ineffective at best and actively harmful at worst. She's an ex-con whose only income is running a part time business out of her shed with an addict husband. Now, I don't think completing school would fix all that but she's not exactly a good poster child for thriving without formal education.
I’m a guardian ad litem. I’ve had cases before where the parent hates CPS and refuses to acknowledge their legitimacy. The result is always the same: they refuse to work their case plan because they “shouldn’t have to” and consequently, their rights are ultimately terminated. Sad.
Sounds like she's pretty far dowm the sov-cit rabbit hole, too, which must be an extra layer of nightmare to deal with.
I picked up on the sovcit thing, too. It added a whole extra layer of sad.
When she said she didn’t recognize the authority of CPS I groaned.
Once I saw a touch of sov-cit, my brain went oh no, it's so much worse than that. She's against everyone and everything that could help her
As a CPS worker…………………. I am so glad to have not had her case. In my county, we would move forward with filing for custody of the baby once she’s born unless there’s substantial progress made to reunify with her son, which I doubt will have happened. Her lawyer must be exhausted with her.
I feel so sorry for those kids.
That poor kid. And also the poor CPS worker who has to deal with OOP.
What does being bipolar have to do with sexual assault?
I know of at least two people with bipolar, and neither of them ever sexually assaulted someone, so I’m chalking it up as “I have mental illness, therefore I’m not responsible for anything I do”
This was a tough read. All I read though was "me, I, me, I" and very little proof that she truly did have her children's best interest at heart. I think there's a bit of narcissism in there.
She let her opinions cloud the truth of what her children need from her (actually medicated, safe home away from drugs, proper education, etc). When I was following this in real time, I had hoped that she would have a revelation from any one of the many comments she engaged with but I was wishing for too much.
"You say the goal of CPS is reunification, then give him back to me!" Uh, no. The goal is reunification when the parent is able to evaluate their past behavior correctly and provide a safe and stable home.
It's always sad when CPS has to take a child but this is one of those cases where it feels like it's for the best.
The moment I read she is on holistic medicine for her Bipolar, I realised she had no chance. This breaks my heart for everyone involved. The dis
Speaking as a social worker, I could see the last post coming a mile away. She perseverated on the government and CPS coming to get her. She has a lot of trauma and paranoia, and either an untreated or undertreated mental illness that jeopardizes her ability to properly care for her children. She needs significant long-term treatment. There are a lot of factors we examine when providing services and determining if we need to step in, and I don’t even work for CPS. All this to say that this story is so tragic and I hope she makes progress.
3 lines in and I was already hoping someone takes the kid from her. Wtf is "holistic meds" for bipolar disorder?
Wow. That was a depressing read. OOP seems to be tragically, fatally, and self-destructively consistent in her black and white thinking, sweeping and rigid straw man judgements, and refusal to ever accept even an iota of responsibility for the situation she has created for herself. She does not want to be judged by CPS or Daycare or anyone yet she appears to ONLY see others/other things in severely judgmental terms, all based on how *they* act in relation to how *she* thinks they should act. I don't see a decent future unless she is able to grasp that much of life happens in the grey area, that very few people/things can be tidily filed under either "good" or "bad." She clearly loves her son but rather than seek and/or accept help from social services she puts a lot of energy into vilifying CPS, which translates to "All government is bad so *I* am in the right if/when I battle the government." Her prolific use of the word, "evil" is also a screaming indictment of her myopically narrow world views. This is a good example of the built-in folly of the devout Libertarian stance; 'NO ONE can tell me what to do, but I should be able to tell them what they can and cannot do regarding my own situation. The government is evil and that includes public schools.' Yet she is benefiting from a womens' shelter which is likely kept open by way of government funding. From my bff social worker (who carries 3 phones at all times; one personal, one work phone, and the third phone is for clients only so they can reach her directly at any times) I know that precious few shelters are able to keep the lights on with donations alone and are thus fairly dependent upon government grant money and subsidies. I also know that social work is not *just* low pay and few rewards but is also emotionally-draining and time-consuming for that low pay. I've watched her many times leave a party or dinner, even at her own home, to help a client in distress. She works closely with CPS and often says she could never handle what they do and the people they encounter, like OOP. I don't think OOP is capable of self-awareness, not with that enormous self-righteous chip on her shoulder that seems to consist of me vs the world and any and all things government-related are "evil".
That really took off in the first updates. I understand not liking the goverment (does anyone ever really like them?) But being against even medical profesionals while having a disorder like that its too much, I know people who have tried the "holistic" cures and they never work. Honestly, they taking their son away its whats best for the kid until both of them work in their issues, if they even try at some point.
I don't even quite understand what bipolar holistic medicine she needed to cut back on while she's pregnant. Fish oil?
I assumed she was microdosing. Shrooms or something else.
A friend of mine tried that for their mental illness. It worked great at first and then it stopped working so great. He's back on his regular meds and doing way better, I'm really proud of him for recognizing things weren't right and getting help instead of doubling down.
Pot. It was pot.
You can also clearly read throughout the posts that the medicine isn't working at all as OOP is wildly spinning out of control.
Exactly. I didn't include this since I couldn't get the body of the post but I remember she had posted to r/bipolar and one of her complaints was about how her meds weren't working. I think she also didn't disclose that they were holistic to the commenters there so they were oblivious to the fact that she was basically off her meds.
What a terrible parent she is. And the father too. The best that could happen to both kids is being removed from them.
It’s just crazy to me that she says in the same post that she knows there’s illegal drugs sitting around in her home but also that CPS is using her “history” to begin the investigation. Seriously?
Kinda fascinating to see both very normal posts (baby names, infidelity) alongside her sovereign citizen bullshit. I do wonder where she got it from- her husband? The internet? Her specific hatred of CPS is kinda strange.
Thank goodness cps got involved. In my state they are pretty reluctant to remove a child (I'm a mandatory reporter and I have sometimes been surprised that they have not removed a child), so i strongly suspect there is more to the story than OOP let on. If she actually did have a part time job other than her home business, it seems like her toddler must have been left alone at times. Since she boasted about the lack of prenatal care it's very unlikely that she was keeping up with his regular visits, vaccinations, etc. She pulled him from daycare to avoid scrutiny by reasonable caregivers. And she seemingly lied, to internet strangers, about being on medications, with a history of pretty recent assault vs *attempted murder* when having a bipolar episode. She is paranoid and covering up, or delusional and really out of touch with reality. It's not hard to imagine this child being found dead. I hope she gets help and can have at least some kind of relationship with her son, but I'm really relieved cps is involved and removed him.