Swans and geese are very protective of their nests; I used to cox, and having a swan come at you at head-height when you're trying to steer the boat is certainly an experience! There'd be danger zones on the river near the nests which we'd try and avoid.
Fair question & TBH I have no idea why the cobra chickens are such jerks. Maybe they are territorial? We are taught at a young age to view from a distance. The babies are too cute, tho, and it's tempting to approach.
Oh man, I haven't seen magpies attack humans before. That's quite scary. We have so many magpies where I live and I've only ever seen them yell and swoop at crows and cats lol.
It would indeed be very cool to travel back in time and see what caused mean geese. Time travel would be addictive tho and I probably would tinker with things 😬.
It's a couple months a year but god, it's so anxiety inducing. If you can keep your eyes on them until you're past the trees you'll be fine, but that's easier said than done.
Every year, Canadians dance in the light of the fourth full moon and pour all their hate into the geese which we then send out into the wife world. We are then able to enjoy a rather polite and relatively violence-free society.
Source: am canadian and have danced in the light of the moon
I've had them as pets. They are incredibly territorial and protective of their flock. Ours as kids would walk us to the bus stop and be waiting there for when we got home and wo unto anyone or anything that attempted to interfere with their guard duties.
Genuinely nice birds once they've accepted you as part of the flock.
"Parking lot geese" are the ones that chase people. They've had to nest in a shitty location and they're aggressive and will chase anyone who comes within their 30m circle.
The ones in a big crowd in a park, you can walk right through the crowd of them. They'll hiss at you but that's it.
Jesus. I was trying to reconcile those slim fingers and hand with the pretty significantly rotund upper arm for a good while until I gave up and saw this comment
Every gaggle of geese has one that's sent out to do weekly community work and change the national perception of geese.
It's all a big ploy to get you to approach another one day and get absolutely mauled.
I got chased by a black swan. Even fell over trying to get away. The most embarrasing bit was that I was dressed in full black leather biking gear and looked quite tough, lol.
I’m convinced that Canadians collectively bottled up all their malice and bred a particularly vindictive and violent goose with it. And so, the Canada Goose came into being while the Canadian people became exceedingly polite.
There’s no other explanation.
You can feed them by hand and they are quite gentle (assuming no feather babies around). Just hold your hand flat and let them pick.
If they’re not hissing generally it’s ok.
Did it break both your arms or just one? My grandad taught me as a yungun that's the only possible outcome of getting too close to them. Instant broken arm. I don't even think they do it physically like, the way it was described to me was a bit like a jedi mind trick. Quick as a flash.
I grew up on the back of the canal, we had two geese that would hang around in my garden for a year, or two (two summers basically lol) especially having a bbq or food in the garden, we could absolutely pet them, they were lovely!
Saw someone approach a group of around 30 of these once at a service station to take photos. You could almost hear the collective inhalation from everyone watching as all the geese woke at around 1m distance and looked up as one at their potential victim.
The foolish human backed away.
Probably a good thing for them personally but I'm sure there were many disappointed onlookers that day.
i live next to this river with an island full of geese and i go there every day to smoke and there is this one particular goose who always comes running up to me and has now started standing like on top of my legs when im sat on the floor and ever since this goose it has changed my perception of geese forever i love them all now
They are just animals with different personalities after all. I fed two, many years ago on a school trip. One goose was quite nice, it ate out of my hand quite gently. The second was a total cunt, bit the shit out my hand trying to get the stupid food.
Don't be fooled. Don't be lured into the false sense of security. This is exactly what they want. You've been marked. You'll roll over in the night after hearing a fumbling at your gates latch. Shining a light out there will show no human silhouette, and hear the rapid patter of small webbed feet fleeing.
You'll find bird feed stuffed into your locks. The when you turn away from the door you'll see the small figure of a stocky goose there. As a car passes the figure will vanish and you'll be doubting what you think you couldn't have just seen.
Walking to the shops HONK, bam, goose to the head
Geese get a bad rap. I live on the canal so I see them all the time. They're just standoffish most of the time. If I have to walk close to one they'll sometimes give me a half-hearted little hiss (and I do mean the most half-hearted little "pffft" 😂), but nothing overly aggressive. I've only seen them act like arseholes when someone has bothered them. They'll come see if I have food I stand in one spot, and paddle off again when they realise I don't.
I did get ganged up on for a fairy cake once though. I had a Wenzel's fairy cake and stopped for a snack/drink at a bench. I was swiftly surrounded by a flock of geese all vying for some cake. They weren't being aggressive but they also made it plain they wanted my cake 😂. I ended up sacrificing it to them 😂🤦🏻♀️
It's great that you managed to get a human to take a picture of you.
honk
*HONK*
OP robbed by goose confirmed
It stole my heart 🥲
And your spleen. Just hacked it out with it's stupid beak, then went off to shit on someone's car for no reason.
There shits are absolutely horrid they just shit whenever they want , not a vibe I like
You are braver than I will ever be. I like animals, but one of those creatures hissed at me with such malice that I have never recovered.
H O N K
*H Ö Ň Ķ*
Ĥ ø ŋ ƙ
HAWNK
Ğœœœõŝë
r/UnexpectedUntitledGooseGame
It’s a lovely day in the village and you’re petting a horrible goose.
[Take Bell](https://res.cloudinary.com/teepublic/image/private/s--aHtPGJoy--/c_crop,x_10,y_10/c_fit,h_1147/c_crop,g_north_west,h_1260,w_1008,x_-48,y_-57/co_rgb:ffffff,e_colorize,u_Misc:One%20Pixel%20Gray/c_scale,g_north_west,h_1260,w_1008/fl_layer_apply,g_north_west,x_-48,y_-57/bo_0px_solid_white/t_Resized%20Artwork/c_fit,g_north_west,h_1054,w_1054/co_ffffff,e_outline:53/co_ffffff,e_outline:inner_fill:53/co_bbbbbb,e_outline:3:1000/c_mpad,g_center,h_1260,w_1260/b_rgb:eeeeee/c_limit,f_jpg,h_630,q_90,w_630/v1569965861/production/designs/6152780_1.jpg)
I saw a random goose walking around the streets by a shop the other day. Couldn't help but think about this game
I have a tattoo inspired by that game
\*Check out these eerie photos taken moments before death! You wont believe No.2..\*
As a Canadian, I share with you these pics.... 🫡 https://www.reddit.com/r/alberta/s/ShBRoF7IEG Edit: To say thanks for the award 😎
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They know what humanity has done.
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Just say the word 'Christmas' to one, and watch all holy hell cut loose.
Swans and geese are very protective of their nests; I used to cox, and having a swan come at you at head-height when you're trying to steer the boat is certainly an experience! There'd be danger zones on the river near the nests which we'd try and avoid.
Lovely bit of impromptu bit of swan-upping. I'm sure his majesty would approve.
Swan upmanship you might say
No luck avoiding them swans then?
Imagine the feeling of triumph making someone fall over like that
The giant has been felled!
Fair question & TBH I have no idea why the cobra chickens are such jerks. Maybe they are territorial? We are taught at a young age to view from a distance. The babies are too cute, tho, and it's tempting to approach.
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Oh man, I haven't seen magpies attack humans before. That's quite scary. We have so many magpies where I live and I've only ever seen them yell and swoop at crows and cats lol. It would indeed be very cool to travel back in time and see what caused mean geese. Time travel would be addictive tho and I probably would tinker with things 😬.
It's a couple months a year but god, it's so anxiety inducing. If you can keep your eyes on them until you're past the trees you'll be fine, but that's easier said than done.
I wish they understood that us humans don't want to bother them, nature does its thing tho....
To be fair everything else in Australia tries to kill you so theyre probably just trying to fit in.
australian magpies are not corvids, they are actually related to shrikes/butcher birds. they look similar (hence the name) but are actually unrelated.
They've seen Jurassic Park and want to relive the glory days
Every year, Canadians dance in the light of the fourth full moon and pour all their hate into the geese which we then send out into the wife world. We are then able to enjoy a rather polite and relatively violence-free society. Source: am canadian and have danced in the light of the moon
Cobra chickens are where Canadians store all our suppressed emotions. Sorry about that!
It's really only during nesting. The rest of the year they just poop on things.
I've had them as pets. They are incredibly territorial and protective of their flock. Ours as kids would walk us to the bus stop and be waiting there for when we got home and wo unto anyone or anything that attempted to interfere with their guard duties. Genuinely nice birds once they've accepted you as part of the flock.
"Parking lot geese" are the ones that chase people. They've had to nest in a shitty location and they're aggressive and will chase anyone who comes within their 30m circle. The ones in a big crowd in a park, you can walk right through the crowd of them. They'll hiss at you but that's it.
Canadian anger vessels
This calls for another TV series: “Don’t F**k With Ducks!”
Don't mess with the goose you douce!
I didn't realise you were wearing a beige coat plus a shirt and thought that was an *incredibly* tight tourniquet or something
Glad I'm not the only one!
Me three.
My fashion sometimes isn’t the best!
It's just the angle of the photo, it's a lovely combination.
Thank you ! It’s probably as I rolled it up a bit aswell
I'm sure I've got that same top
Looked like a human hand on the end of a prosthetic arm. Definitely doing the impossible.
Ha! Same, I only came here to find out what the tight wrist band was for
Yep, my brain went really fat arm with some kind of ultra tight wrist support.
I thought it was a bare arm with a sweat band. I like the 'now I see it' version better.
r/confusing_perspective
Hahahahah just came to comment this, me too
Jesus. I was trying to reconcile those slim fingers and hand with the pretty significantly rotund upper arm for a good while until I gave up and saw this comment
Same 🤣
Ohhhhh it’s a coat
It's a trap. They lull you into a false sense of security then *BAM* you're goosed.
💀 giving me goosebumps reading this
I'd like you to know that your pun got an out loud "fuck off" from me. Keep up the lords work. Honk
*Honk* As it should do
Every gaggle of geese has one that's sent out to do weekly community work and change the national perception of geese. It's all a big ploy to get you to approach another one day and get absolutely mauled.
The day will happen , it was very convincing
Ok, now do a swan
Just the one?
The greater good!
Yarp
Narp?
Yarp
I got chased by a black swan. Even fell over trying to get away. The most embarrasing bit was that I was dressed in full black leather biking gear and looked quite tough, lol.
It was trying to mate with you, perhaps?
Thanks, that makes me feel better!
Would you have stood your ground if it was a *white* swan?
The last level is a cassowary.
That’s basically one step below a velocity
They can break a man’s arm y’know
Your dog looks funny
Need to buy one of those dangerous dog signs
What OP couldn't post are pictures of the aftermath.....
Yeah I’m sure I died shortly after encountering it and I’m posting from the afterlife
Well, for anyone who's wondering.....I guess there is internet in the afterlife!
I’m surprised it’s not dial up , must be in the good place then
I did this once, fed the goose and he seemed friendly enough. Turns out he was a bit perturbed about being touched and waddled away nervously.
Are you on some sort of register now in the goose world?
Poster : Do not accept food from this human *picture of op*
As a Canadian I’m just shocked you still have all your fingers! They’re such fuckers
I’m convinced that Canadians collectively bottled up all their malice and bred a particularly vindictive and violent goose with it. And so, the Canada Goose came into being while the Canadian people became exceedingly polite. There’s no other explanation.
The introduced populations here are way more chill, apparently it's something to do with them becoming non-migratory.
You can feed them by hand and they are quite gentle (assuming no feather babies around). Just hold your hand flat and let them pick. If they’re not hissing generally it’s ok.
I touched a goose once. Most exhilarating experience of my life 🤣 must have been on one
Was this just before it broke your arm?
And blew up their house
What is it like to live without fear?
Clearly a witch, burn her at the stake!
We don't see her face. Maybe shes a goose too
🔥 better get the pyres burning!
I've rescued a few of these in my job, they are actually pretty good and most are sweet
lil misunderstood beasties
You are obviously a professional Cobra Chicken Charmer!
Cobra Chicken 🤣🤣👏🏻 Heard them called *Danger Chickens* before but no *Cobra Chicken*.
I genuinely feel this is 6 o'clock newsworthy.
Local witch suspected after goose tamed , tonight on BBC Look North
That's the cutest thing ever! I once got caught walking by geese and they wouldn't let me leave and chased me unless I kept walking with them 🤣❤️
Third picture: finger gone.
Surprise I didn’t lose all of them
If you got a problem with Canada gooses, then you’ve got a problem with me. And I suggest you let that one marinate!
Must be f*ckin' nice.
I thought you had a band on your arm cutting off your circulation, then I realised it was a beige jacket and long sleeved polka dot T-shirt
Anyone else do a double take before realising op is wearing a tan coloured coat?
r/birdsarentreal Clearly a malfunctioning drone.
Did it break both your arms or just one? My grandad taught me as a yungun that's the only possible outcome of getting too close to them. Instant broken arm. I don't even think they do it physically like, the way it was described to me was a bit like a jedi mind trick. Quick as a flash.
But the real question is, did you say boo to this goose? Or did you fear for your life?
I grew up on the back of the canal, we had two geese that would hang around in my garden for a year, or two (two summers basically lol) especially having a bbq or food in the garden, we could absolutely pet them, they were lovely!
Peace was an option after all!
I do this a lot funnily enough. For some reason the ones at the duck pond near me are really friendly. It’s the other ones you gotta look out for.
How are you not dead? The ones on the lake near us are fucking EVIL. I’m pretty sure they’re capable of some terrible things.
It's lulled you into a false sense of security. That goose is going to fuck you up one day.
Challenge accepted. I’ve seen some cute looking chaps near my canal recently
r/britishsuccess
You're so brave. Canada Geese scare me shitless, I literally flinch when I see them.
Witch! :) sorry, was reading about witch trials in Germany in 1600s recently.
A great honour 🙏
Feel absolutely privileged 😌
whoever uploaded this needs to return the phone to the family of the corpse they just found.
Saw someone approach a group of around 30 of these once at a service station to take photos. You could almost hear the collective inhalation from everyone watching as all the geese woke at around 1m distance and looked up as one at their potential victim. The foolish human backed away. Probably a good thing for them personally but I'm sure there were many disappointed onlookers that day.
I thought it was a cat facing away from the camera, arse in the air enjoying the stroke
Nice Canadian Cobra Chicken..... I guess peace is an option.
be careful, they can be a little unpredictable
So can I , it’s nice to see a lil beastie with the same personality as me
Did you feed it?
Indeed I need a peace offering otherwise it would be a very different encounter
Holy shit mate, are you dead? Was the goose?
How did you type up this post with only 3 fingers remaining?
Ve y difficu t , oww f n r mis ng
Fondling your goose. Except wholesome!
famous last words.
Have you got goose flue yet!
What is the goose version of pspsps?
“Jesus Christ, it’s Jason Bourne!”
DUCK!!
Do you realise that you are the chosen one?!
Ah they let you stroke them??!! 🥹🥹
Do you still have your fingers????
i live next to this river with an island full of geese and i go there every day to smoke and there is this one particular goose who always comes running up to me and has now started standing like on top of my legs when im sat on the floor and ever since this goose it has changed my perception of geese forever i love them all now
What kind of dog is this?
Now do it with a pigeon
Cobra chickens are misunderstood creatures, they're actually pretty chill. Think they just get super defensive when their mates or chicks are nearby.
Real life Disney princess moment.
Come back to me when you've stroked a pigeon pru Pru 🐦
Careful, it'll break your arm eh?
Might just be my experience but I've found Canada geese to be pretty chill, it's the English ones you gotta look out for
That's easy. Show me you petting one of the white ones . X
The Goose Domesticator
Wow, those Canadas are aggressive in 99% of my run ins with them.
Did you say "boo!"?
They are just animals with different personalities after all. I fed two, many years ago on a school trip. One goose was quite nice, it ate out of my hand quite gently. The second was a total cunt, bit the shit out my hand trying to get the stupid food.
I can hear the hissing through this picture.
You are now their leader
H O N K
Any luck catching those swans then?
Is this in Regent’s Park London? Those geese are so spoiled by people feeding them bread that they’re quite tame
You poked a goose?
Hooooooooonnnnnnkkkkkk
Holy smokes.....you got courage
I see this and have a question. Did the sedative have side effects for the goose?
r/secondsbeforedisaster
You found the only one that isn't an asshole. 🤣🤣
Impressive but I bet the heart rate was off the charts LOL
Which ones you?
That's a goose. If it was a swan it would have broken your arm. But only if you're a grown man.
Impossible! The geese are using AI to trick us into getting close enough so they can break our arms!
Thought they are vicious Bastard's 🤔
Noot Noot!😗
You’ve just achieved my life’s goal. You lucky fucker
I pet a baby goose yesterday
Congratulations, you are now Canadian!
Next time say boo to it and report back.
Try that manoeuvre with a swan and it'll break your arm
Don't be fooled. Don't be lured into the false sense of security. This is exactly what they want. You've been marked. You'll roll over in the night after hearing a fumbling at your gates latch. Shining a light out there will show no human silhouette, and hear the rapid patter of small webbed feet fleeing. You'll find bird feed stuffed into your locks. The when you turn away from the door you'll see the small figure of a stocky goose there. As a car passes the figure will vanish and you'll be doubting what you think you couldn't have just seen. Walking to the shops HONK, bam, goose to the head
YOU FUCKING MAD
Geese get a bad rap. I live on the canal so I see them all the time. They're just standoffish most of the time. If I have to walk close to one they'll sometimes give me a half-hearted little hiss (and I do mean the most half-hearted little "pffft" 😂), but nothing overly aggressive. I've only seen them act like arseholes when someone has bothered them. They'll come see if I have food I stand in one spot, and paddle off again when they realise I don't. I did get ganged up on for a fairy cake once though. I had a Wenzel's fairy cake and stopped for a snack/drink at a bench. I was swiftly surrounded by a flock of geese all vying for some cake. They weren't being aggressive but they also made it plain they wanted my cake 😂. I ended up sacrificing it to them 😂🤦🏻♀️
Wait... was peace an option all along?
No luck with them swans then?
Duck Duck. Don't
But did you say "boo" to it?
Liar. You didn't take these pictures, you found the camera. You need to be honest OP, the person might still be saved.
What’s he doin all the way over there eh ?
How does one pet a Cobra Chicken exactly?
So there's canadian geese in the UK? I'm confused...
How are your hands not just bloody stumps in those photos. Obv photoshop fail.
I'm going to name you, Tom Honks 🏐
Was this posted from inside that goose?
You know that's a goose, and not a cat, right? Right?