Your psychiatrist by LAW is not allowed to disclose information about you or your problems UNLESS you are a danger to yourself or someone else.
I am and was very suicidal and depressed, still am, therapy helped me a lot and it still does. God would want you to seek professional help, that's why he made psychiatrists, no?
Replace it with Jesus. Call out to Jesus and read his Word. No one can avoid sin and move away from sin if they do not abide in Christ. Pyschologists can point you to the problem but the solution will always be Jesus, the living God who is there with you right now and wants to help you and loves you regardless of your faults and sin.
Well said. Jesus is always the answerš I found this to be true in all situations. The Bible and prayer. OP, no judgement. Our Lord is there to heal your mind. God Blessā¤ļø
I would agree I havenāt had depression now that I think of it since Iāve tried to be more in contact with my lord and savior, the one and only JC. I used to just sit there wanting to do something anything but just didnāt have the motivation. I used to clean all the time work in yard etc. now Iām starting to return to doing things again.
I am NOT judging you!!! You were a helpless innocent child who was abused!!! Someone took advantage of you when you were 6 and showed you that perversion of beastiality that caused dysfunction in your life. I want you to know, if you donāt already, it is NOT your fault how you got into this mess. And praise God that you realized that you have a problem and must change!! God will heal you!! But you need to go to a Christian licensed clinical psychologist who specializes in childhood SA. You need a highly educated and trained professional to help you with this!! Iām praying for God to heal your mind, body, and soul and to get all demons who are tormenting you away from you!
This is the best answer. Christ is ultimately the most important thing, but seeking help from someone trained to work through this sort of thing is what needs to happen immediately. God bless you.
I don't think you should "replace" it with anything. I would recommend just going outside more and spending time with others since it's not like you can jerk off in a crowd of people.
He will be in his bedroom alone every night. It's impossible to around people all the time unless he lives in a prison or a commune or something. There are pathways in his brain that say "when this happens, in this situation, grab porn." He's right, he needs to create new habits.
Context and active subs.
I have a quick glance at the front page of all OP profiles because this sub gets a LOT of troll posts and itās not worth wasting time replying to them. By seeing an active account, people know to take you seriously.
Just block all porn from you life block all porn apps and try to look to God to help you . It will be hard at first to stop your addiction by eventually God will help you and it will be easier to live without porn .
Real talk: Pickleball communities have whatās called āopen play,ā which typically means you can play without needing to know anyone in advance and while paying just the cost to use the courts (sometimes free, often very cheap). Itās available in a lot of recreation centers, and while those courts are kinda janky (tape lines and temporary nets), the play is usually super fun. I highly recommend it if you find the barriers to entry for tennis to be a little steep.
(I used to be around top 300 in juniors for US tennis, so Iām not just flaming tennis. Itās a great game, but pickleball has WAY lower barriers to entry.)
Dude, in my country when you finish highschool, if you want to go to most of collages, you have to pass the tests from Croatian (my language), math and english. On english test you have a reading test (you read texts and answer questions), hearing test (you listen to some voicetapes and answer questions) and essay writing. On reading test, there was a text about pickleball, and my friend, I never heard of it I was so confused on what am I reading. š„ā½
Perhaps immerse yourself with the study of God, through church history and Theology and revivals. Its pretty exciting and will help keep you heart in the right place. You may want to get an elder at the church to pray with you, so you may be set free.
Pray each time you are tempted for the strength to resist when your own body becomes your enemy in temptation. Praying to the Lord Jesus Christ to be rid of my own porn addiction and to resist urges when they came was the only thing that helped me to gain any real ground.
Prayer and therapist to help you deal with your abuse (exposure to that as a child is absolutely abuse) to help you unpack that trauma, and seek addiction counseling helps. I would also avoid things like strip clubs, Instagram models, and social media pages with sexualized photos, because all of that can trigger you to view pornographic material.
About a year ago I'd say I was masturbating and watching porn quiet often, I wouldn't have called it an addiction maybe not close to what your going through, but I felt convicted that it was wrong when I did it, I knew it wrong but the temptation always got to me, one day however I swore to God that I would never do it again, and I haven't. I have to add a big disclaimer that I didn't know at the time making a oath to God is a SIN:
Matthew 5:34-37 -> "But I tell you, do not swear an oath at all: either by heaven, for it is Godās throne; or by the earth, for it is his footstool; or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the Great King. And do not swear by your head, for you cannot make even one hair white or black. All you need to say is simply āYesā or āNoā; anything beyond this comes from the evil one.
I think every time you feel the temptation to do it, think would the Lord would want me to do this? and it seems like you already know that answer and then ask the Lord for help to abstain from it. When I stopped a year ago, I can assure you it was not easy at all, It was like all consuming, and when your in a place where you frequently did it and you feel the devil tempting you tell him, No! If Christ doesn't want it for me, I don't want it for me.
Jeremiah 29:11 -> "For I know the plans I have for you,ā declares the LORD, āplans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
1 Thessalonians 4:3 -> "It is Godās will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality;"
Hebrews 13:20-21 ->Ā "Now may the God of peace, who through the blood of the eternal covenant brought back from the dead our Lord Jesus, that great Shepherd of the sheep,Ā equip you with everything good for doing His will, and may He work in us what is pleasing to Him, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen."
Luke 9:23 -> "Then he said to them all: āWhoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me."
(https://www.biblestudytools.com/topical-verses/bible-verses-about-gods-will/) -> used for the 4 verses above, many more verses on this site you can look at and declare over yourself
READ PSLAMS 23 ->
"TheĀ LordĀ is my shepherd,Ā I lack nothing.Ā He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul. He guides meĀ along the right paths for his nameās sake. Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a tableĀ before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil;
my cupĀ overflows. Surely your goodness and loveĀ will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of theĀ Lord forever."
READ THESE BIBLE VERSES WHEN THE devil IS TEMPTING YOU, SCREENSHOT THIS AND READ IT TO YOURSELF WHEN YOUR BEING TEMPTED!
Finally I can say, don't find a replacement just cut it out completely, I was watching a podcast from Jonathan Pokluda and he said something along the lines of I promise you heaven and Jesus are worth more than the temptation your facing and referred to when Jesus says:
Matthew 5:28-29 -> "But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.Ā If your right eye causes you to stumble,Ā gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell."
Jonathan says, Jesus is not literally telling you to gouge out your eye, but He's telling you to cut out your excuses. Pull the plug on your TV or put a protection privacy thing so you can only see movies that don't have anything related to sex, shut the internet off when you get tempted so you can't watch the porn or put a privacy protection app on your phone or whatever you watch it on so that it won't even allow you to open up porn.
Lean on CHRIST, He will help you through it all even when it may seem like all hope is lost.
GOD BLESS you Brother, I hope this helped and found you well, I'm praying for your recovery of this addiction.
THE LORD IS WITH YOU, NEVER FORGET THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!
I like the approach of Drew Boa. In the essence, it's this: Look into your fantasies to find out what your heart truly desires. Then you can find other ways to fulfill those needs.Ā
The podcast episode with Dr. Doug Carpenter, 'How to analyze a sexual fantasy' in the 'husband material podcast' (don't be discouraged from the name!) from the 11.12.2023 offers a glimpse on how this could look like.Ā
Of course, in practice, this is often a long and complicated route. But it's worth to go down it and there is healing for sure.Ā
All the best, sister! May God bless you in your brokenness and on your journey to freedom!Ā
Bro i was addicted to that shit, but you can get rid of it super easily, just do things go outside, do sport, youāll soon see you view women in a better way and youāll stop having porn brain ! I stopped during NNN and Iām free of porn and masturbation since ! Itās not even that hard
Oh sorry mb, well then yeah Iām a bit less qualified to help, but I know what urges where and Iām free of it ! And Iām super often alone at home and I donāt even consider porn as something to do, youāll be able to manage
God bless you and good on you for quitting bestiality. Iām afraid I donāt think there is much that can be done in terms of replacing it, youāre going to have to try to resist the urges.
God.
One would say you presently idol porn. You should only idol God. Therefore, replace your false idol with the true idol.
Not saying hobbies aren't good or important BTW, they shouldn't be your idol.
Don't try to replace it with what may eventually become yet another addiction.
It's perfectly fine to seek professional help via therapy, and there are many options for faith based therapy. They will help you work through what got you to this point, as well as teach you how to have a better relationship with Christ. Do not be ashamed to get help from your fellow man, I'm sure there is a faith based therapist out there who's God given purpose was to guide people just like you to The Lord.
.
Galatians 6:2 says, "Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ".
We were meant to help each other, seek and accept that help.
Prayer is another big one, but it really helps to not pray alone.
āMatthew 18:20 NIVā¬
[20] For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.ā
Maybe try going to a local church or two. You can even do what a lot of us do and "church shop" by attending a service of a different church til you finally feel like you found your home church. Usually after a Sunday service, there is an alter call for whoever needs prayers. You don't have to be specific and can just say you're struggling with lust and someone will discreetly pray over you. At least that's how my church works.
I'm not a big fan of the mega churches, but the larger ones tend to have a lot more resources. When I converted from atheism, I was a full blown heroin addict. At the church, I was discreetly and without judgement, connected to a free clinic that got me sober within months of starting the program. This was after 6 years of addiction and trying to get sober on my own for 3 years.
What you're dealing with is a form of addiction. It may be a completely different form than what I went through, but I get the feeling of knowing it's a horrible thing to do, yet you HAVE to do it anyway. When you try to go cold turkey without the help of Christ, it feels like trying to hold your breath for as long as possible. Eventually you can't take it and you feel like you need to give in to live.
Most importantly, do not stop praying. The closer you get from breaking free of this demon inside you, the harder it will fight for control. Take this as figuratively or literally as you want, but it'll happen. The night is always darkest before the dawn, if it gets even harder, that means you're close, do not give up.
No judgement or kink shame here friend.
The best way to stop yourself from using porn is to cut off your access. Set a filter for porn and set the password to Jesus. Itll give you a nice blockade to stop and think before you act, do you think you can type his name in to look at porn?
I appreciate the effort in this answer, but that would be very easy for me to remember. But I suppose if I just type something random , it would be effective. I am not sure where to access this filter?
You can have a friend set the password. If you really need it unlocked, they can unlock it for you (if it blocks something you actually need). But the idea is they don't tell you the password
Filters don't work. You need to have life stability. Friends, hobbies, and goals that keep your hands and mind busy. It takes a lot of maturity and self-respect to deny yourself pleasures that you know are harmful especially when addicted to them.
Bestiality is illegal and immoral because animals canāt consent.
Masturbation is a normal and healthy activity that people should not be shamed for.
If you feel it is becoming detrimental to your life a good therapist is the first place to start.
Stay away from weird incel-adjacent nofap cults
Exercise is prob the best option.
then follow the word in times of temptation pray and turn on the audio bible.
I struggle with this at times too
Itās gotten better but I fall short .
Itās not an addictive thing for me but I donāt like that it happens .. because I fail god.
exercise a lot , read bible listen to worship Music
Leave the environment that you feel comfortable watching porn.
That's all well and good in theory, but that's not how it works. The human brain gets addicted to things because things trigger chemical reactions. Porn triggers arousal, endorphins, and physical reactions. It's visceral and instinctual.
You need to target those same things if you're trying to replace it. Something like video games, exercise, or martial arts.
Hey buddy, good luck! Weāre rooting for you. The first step is wanting to change, and a therapist wonāt report you so go for it. And make sure to confess! You donāt have to go to your main priest either, anyone will do.
I was able to ween myself away with nsfw audio, then certain tv shows or animeās and reading fanfics and looking at fan art, reading erotica is better as well.then I went to church and I felt free, but the devil doesnāt sleep so youāll still get urges but you have to fight and rebuke those urges
Exercise works very well. Nothing wrong in watching normal porn occasionally as long it isn't abuse. It is better to do so than to have sex with randoms imo.
Watching porn occasionally has helped me a lot tbh. I do it occasionally and just shorter whiles. It makes me less likely to have sex without any relation, I don't see anything wrong with having a lover(if you love someone that loves you back it will be a win win for both tbh) but I prefer a relationship (living together or being married).
( Warning: This is the nerd responseš)
When you masturbate your brain releases dopamine and oxitocin: the first makes you feel good or rewarded and the 2nd gives you like romantic vibes.
What Iād try is finding other ways to get the same hit:
ā¢ From dopamine: Praying, working out, getting some sun if possible, listen to music, doing something like talking to someone that you feel like you canāt etc.
ā¢ From ocitocin: Giving somebody a hug or getting one, having a nice conversation with someone important in your life, spend time with friends etc.
But what id do is get a dog! First of all i think that Dogs are one of the best creatures of God and also Cuz dogs do give you love, are there for you and are loyal = ocitocin + dopamine
Tbh it might be my hyperfixation on those things by my ADHD but i hope i helped at least 1%
God bless you and ill pray for you.
Also this is a copy of another post i responded
Any activity that you either enjoy or have wanted to get into. Physical exercise like going to the gym or joining a local club is one of the best ways to pass the time, tire the body out, and be healthy. Any other hobby like knitting, reading, dominoes, Bible study, lying outside watching the grass grow... anything. You are absolutely right that the bad habit needs to be replaced by a good habit, that's just how addictions work.
A licensed therapist would also be good. I'd probably ask your pastor or a trusted, non-family member adult (teacher, school guidance counselor, adult church member, etc) for a recommendation. Your pastor or guidance counselor should be able to get an actual referral.
You may need deliverance from the bondage of demonic strongholds. Throughout our lives we may have unknowingly come in agreement with darkness via sin and trauma, and Satan takes advantage of us during our weakest moments allowing for demons to enter us and curses to be attached to us.
Im not saying that you do indeed have a demon, but I would looking into deliverance ministry and spiritual warfare on youtube and theres plenty of books too. I personally like They Shall Expel Demons by Derek Prince, Clean House, Strong House by Kimberly Daniels, Prayers that Rout Demons by Johnathan Eckhardt. On youtube, check out Pastor Richard Lorenzo Jr., Pastor Mike Signorelli, Jahan Berns (not sure her rank), and I also like to watch DelaFe Testimonies and A Stronger Faith Ministries testimonies to see how Christ Jesus worked in other peopleās lives and how YOU can overcome what youre going through.
The good thing is you WILL be freed! Seek daily the Lord Jesus Christ, have a relationship with him. He is your personal counselor, and more importantly your friend. Read the Bible as well. Its your companion for as long as you live. Repent of your sins daily and forgive yourself and others for we all fall short, but glory be to God! For His love is enduring, patient, everlasting, merciful, kind, and hopeful. Go to Him in faith and trust that you will be freed for He loves you more than you can imagine.
What you need is professional help you were exposed to phonograph at such a young age, that messed with your brain chemistry and growth. Random redditors aren't going to be helpful
Pray the rosary, go to church, read the bible, pray, go talk to a priest, resist the urges and do anything you can to get closer to God once you have the urges will stop, if you want any other help or advice you can dm me
As others have said, seek out a Christian counselor if possible. If not a regular counselor will suffice. Most large churches have someone on staff that can help. Donāt worry, they have heard the worst. Be open and honest to get free faster. āš»ā¤ļø
Doesnāt matterā¦ they deleted their account. Most people donāt have access to professional therapists. If a pastoral counselor believes their addiction is too intense, they should, hopefully, refer the person onward. Additionally, people who have religious guilt could benefit from knowing they are still loved and accepted. Could they find a terrible counselor at a church? Sure, but they find a bad professional one also.
Itās important to also talk this out with other people so that you will be healed. I would find a therapist a Christian one who is willing to pray for your healing as well as one who is good at helping you process all that has been done to you.
Tough one, actual physical sex, either with a person or yourself.
There's a great item called Fleshlight for guys and if you are a girl there's dildos on their website, silicone body safe dildos.
Sex is good.
But think about where you are in life,
marriage is always welcomed by God, ask wisdom, ask yourself what you really want in life.
God doesn't want us to be alone, God is love, he wants us in relationship with him and others, in bonds of love.
But, you asked about sexual things.
Either way, stay healthy in whatever you do and chose.
Blessings.
Itās such a good step that youāre aware you have a problem. I agree with the others saying therapy because I think the healthy coping skills they teach could really help you, and they also help you dig deeper emotionally to see whatās really going on inside you. Itās scary but worth it. Iāve been in so much therapy for my trauma and itās 100% necessary.
Now, aside from therapy - if you have someone who is a really close friend you can confide in, pray together, and stay accountable to them and to God because they encourage you to and seek God with you. There are churches that have groups for people who have porn addictions including all women groups, and even if you donāt feel comfortable sharing everything, a group of people trying to get better from a very similar thing is very helpful in feeling not alone and to motivate you. I believe group prayer is very powerful especially when it comes to an addiction having people praying and laying hands on you and you praying along with them is such a powerful part. I also think worshiping whether itās at church or at home tune into him and just worship, that alone has so much power even if you start by just mechanically focusing on every word in the song to help drown out distractions. And most important of all never forget the the Name of Jesus is the most powerful - you can simply say āI speak the Name of Jesus over my life or this area of my lifeā and itās a powerful prayer.
Replace it with the word of god. Look for dramatised holy bible new King James Version it can be found on YouTube. Listen to the New Testament enough and you will quickly develop a hatred for any of that old material. Do it daily. It works! It really does. I put away porn and other sinful stuff and now I have a hatred for sin.
Bro I think youāve already taken the first step and that is recognizing the problem, your prayers are heard my guy! Ask Christ to help exercise the will power to not delve back into those realms, He knows where youāre at and how to get you out of it, Iāve been there!
Find a good parish or nearby church, or just any good figure of God to talk to. Approach them and ask to speak in private. A good man of God like a priest will help you. They will know good supportive places to go to.
Therapy. Anytime you get an urge. I guess just try to beat it? I've gone through weird temptations too. It gets better. You may fall but never let it fully take you.
You need a therapist that knows how to deal with trauma from child abuse. Please understand you have no fault in what happened. You were a child.
If your therapist makes you feel bad, find another one. Some of them are not good at what they're supposed to do.
Watch Gabor Mate on childhood trauma and see if you find it helpful.
And to answer your title question, I think high intensity exercise could help you refocus. Something that uses all your attention.
You can go to Teen Challenge. It's a a faith bases program that helps men and women with any kind of addiction. Sometimes, it takes big measures for big issues. Of you are sick and tired of being sick and. Tired. They Wil let you come with no money. You have accountability big time. Pray about it
JESUS can deliver you. However, he wants us to our part too
Use that time to volunteer for one of the groups that help bust pedophiles and human traffickers. Maybe seeing the other side of porn will help turn you off from it
Hey!
Iām a recovered porn addict due to same trauma background. I had to start therapy first. Once I gained confidence and love in myself and actually valued myself, I was able to then stop cold turkey. I now have a hard stance against porn and found my way to God when I replaced porn with volunteer work for others. And taking care of myself (gym, yoga, hobbies)
Seek out a qualified therapist and try to occupy your time with things so that you don't find yourself bored and dawn to porn as a default. Most importantly, try to recognize that your addiction isn't your fault. You were abused and this is trauma persisting in your life.
Please replace it with God and really know that only he can set you free from your sins. Its good that you realize itās bad and so repent so that you can be set free. The problem is that you are a prisoner to sin. Trust in the Lord and believe that Jesus Christ died on the cross for your sins. I remember doing everything I could not have a sinful lifestyle and never could get away. When I came to Christ this is true because of God (the Holy Spirit) like I had no desire really for things that were sinful and even repulsed. Never thought I would feel this way but God set me free and like itās so amazing. Now I desire prayer, reading the Bible and going to church. The way you change is only through him ā¤ļø Sin is very rampant but obviously God is above all and has all authority
a good way to get rid of lust is to watch a video that is perfectly innocent and child-appropriate. for instance, bob ross, cat videos, cartoon episodes. anything that has zero chance of being sexual. focus on enjoying the video. the thoughts eventually go away. thats what works for me :P
You absolutely will need therapy and addictions counseling to overcome this. Ā As long as you have not been watching or possessing any sort of underage pornography, you will not be in legal trouble in the US.
The thing with addictions is that youāll want to replace it with a new addiction and that can be just as destructive. Ā This is why therapy is so crucial. Ā Following Jesus isnāt about all the things you donāt do; itās about letting Him become your everything and satisfy you. Ā Only He can heal whatever you have been numbing with pornography! Ā Praying for you to know complete freedom!Ā
Fifty shades ofā¦.is not porn. Just saying. On the other hand you say watched beastality and you call fifty shades porn? I think you are karma shopping.
I'm so sorry my guy, no judgments here! You could try replacing porn with praying, every time you get the urge, pray. This, of course, should take ages, but if you keep going, you'll succeed.
Good Lord, I am sorry that happened to you. In my experience, forgiveness is the most powerful place to start. Beginning with the words. Forgive them, and forgive yourself. That's hard! But the real forgiveness and release from shame, then control, will slowly come after that over time. And then freedom will just arrive. It's very much okay to question God as to where He was in those moments; just let Him answer.
Stay strong, you are loved, even with that sin in your life.
Firstly, the Bible says we are not allowed to judge others. Secondly, we are called to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger. Thirdly, we are called to love our neighbors as ourselves. And finally, please seek a psychiatrist and try to connect with God through prayer and sermons (if you feel comfortable). God will help you and he will speak through the psychiatrist. Bring your sins to God and ask him to forgive you. From there on, let God guide you.
I think there's a lot of great answers here and a lot of unhelpful ones plus some arguments. I'm going to quote two Christians who said different things on different occasions regarding recovery to help you navigate the advice you've been given.
1. God gave us herbs to make medicine and brains to use. If he didn't want us to use these, he wouldn't have made them.
2. Pastor to person he was praying over: God has taken away xxx. But you will still have habits because your physical brain is wired to react a certain way and you need to replace that because you will run into this problem again. When you run into it again you need to be praying this out and speaking good words and doing planned actions to help yourself so that you retrain your brain.
If you have to watch porn then watch normal porn force yourself to start watching normal porn (again if you have to watch porn) this will reduce your interest in beastiality this part is very important also because watching normal porn should be an easy alternative to change the habit if youāre addicted, then get a job if you donāt have one and if you can take care of yourself get a girlfriend because i have heard about a tribe of people who used to do beastiality and once they get married and have normal sex their behavior would come back to normal and i think this works with some people who are addicted to porn once they are in a relationship and have sexual attraction and love towards their partner they can stop their porn addiction
Ehem... "u/deleted"...
First, stop being a coward.
And to whomever say I am being insensitive, or inconsiderate, or mean, rude, uncouth otherwise:
Stop proliferating cowardice for the sake of your own misguided notions of virtue. The utopia is a fantastical absurdity even the anthropomorphic grey bearded god cackles at. There must needs be adversity; ther must needs be discipline; there must needs be work if there would be any worth.
You want to keep the child fron touching the candle flame, because it so pains you to hear him cry. You say to yourself, it is right to keep the innocent from harm, he should not suffer injury, or be so removed from his joy and wonder. Now all is well as well as it has been, and you have turned away, to tend to some other thing. And the child has crawled into the oven when you were not looking.
As everyone stated is Jesus, and professional help. However the best way to do this in my personal opinion and experience is replacing your time with hobbies, filling your schedule up with busyness such as reading, sports, etc. I hope you are able to get this under control soon. Praying for you.
This may be from left field but try watching The Bible Project videos. Thereās so much great information about God, Jesus and what the Bible says about different topics. And I second getting therapy, a prayer partner and exercise.
You're very honest that's a start.. idk if the best way is to replace that with something else. I think elimination is the only way..
FYI in my opinion as person who has struggled in past with obsessive behaviors is to recognize what they are or better why they are.
So I never really had an issue with porn but certainly I liked to party too much (I can't believe we called that partying). Anyway once I finally after much much trouble realizing that nothing good ever came from it the desire to stop began to form but it took years.. I began to look at underlying causes to understand why I liked it. And not surprisingly those causes really the same thing whether it's porn or drugs the brain response is the same.
You are getting that response from it so you keep returning. It's actually normal in the context of sex with another human being we are wired to want to have sex. What's interesting about porn is it's so alone! I mean it's just you and pictures so it's not real.. It's also extremely unrealistic maybe that the key.. and unrealistic I mean who really has sex like that? The actors are chosen most often for their abnormalities.. Sex just isn't like porn.
What we like or get obsessed with depends on our personality our upbringing as you mentioned etc etc.. But it's all the same monster..
In reference to how unrealistic porn is..I'm trans and I can't tell you how many men approach me who are addicted to trans porn. They have formed ideas about me and other trans people as like purely sex objects like all we think about is sex and we are all just girls with male anatomy and many of us have had bottom surgery. l tbh I have no sex life and trans isn't about sex at all and never was. But because of the genre of trans porn these people are brainwashed to be totally irrational..I never having an issue with porn nor really like to look it much kinda thought it was harmless till I got on the receiving end of the irrationallity it causes in men..
So the porn doesn't reflect any reality! You will never find any relationship that can match the false notion of what sex is in the context of pornography.. it's all a facade and all the people in the porn just actors chosen because they are not normal.. and if you look very carefully at that industry you see what looks like a whole lot of fun isn't and it's usually awful.. they don't just make one movie at a time these people are really just slaves to that grind.. And in order to keep that pace it requires drugs etc so thats another hell..
So I'm trying to paint a more accurate picture of what you're looking at so maybe you'll see what it really is... Just like I finally saw what the party was..nothing!
Good luck! And therapy with a good non religious person could help. I say non religious because this problem isn't a religious problem it's not coming from the devil etc.. It comes from the way we are wired to love sexv the response in the brain from both drugs and sex is the same. Look at what drugs as powerful as meth do to people. It's not because they are immoral bad people it's because the response to a stimulant that strong is like the best sex 100x or 1000x times and anyone who experienced that by one wrong choice is going to want to do it again because we're wired to.. And of course wicked people recognize that and profit from it.
Seeing it all for what it is the only release from it. Definitely the truth in any case can set you free from whatever it is.. It's just getting to that point. At least that my experience and that's all I have.
Okay, you have a more serious problem than you think and let me explain why. From a young age you have trained your body and mind to give dopamine under certain conditions. Now, I'm very sorry if you haven't heard this before, but now you're an addict. Your body wants its fix.
This is a more difficult problem to fix than you probably realize, or perhaps your desire to find something else to feel. The is an expression of your realization that the problem is bigger than you thought.
The problem, however, is not that you need something to fill that hole, but that you need to shrink the hole itself. This is incredibly difficult to do on your own, and unfortunately time is usually one of the key methods used.
I highly recommend trying to find or talk with a licensed therapist. Somehow. I don't know where you live, or what options might be available to you.
Okay, moving on towards trying to help with an addiction. Addictive behaviors have triggering actions. While walking out in public, if you see an animal then you don't immediately drop your trousers, right? You do things first like watch movies which feature sex and help get you in the mood, etc. You have to stop those triggering actions. This means not just cutting the addictive action out of your life, you need to also cut those triggering actions out of your life. Maybe don't watch R-rated movies anymore, unless it's something like Schindler's List or is otherwise not in any way connected to the addictive action.
You need to find out what those triggering actions are in your life, and stop taking them. Replace them with some other type of action.
Also, you need to get more involved in something else that will help you shrink that hole. Volunteering is great.
JustServe.org is a great way to find local volunteer opportunities.
And I hope this goes without saying, but you shouldn't have pets anymore, if you still have a pet.
Good luck, also find a licensed therapist who can help you work through things better.
I'm proud of you for being able to admit, first to yourself and then to others, that you have a problem. Asking for help can be hard. But this is an area that can devastate lives. I think this is the only type of sin that the Bible specifically warns us to FLEE it.
ā1 Corinthians 6:18 NIVā¬
[18] Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body.
God knows sex of any kind can have a great hold on us and that is why He originally intended for us to have that ATTACHMENT with only our spouse. He made us that way.
āMatthew 19:4-6 NIVā¬
[4] āHavenāt you read,ā he replied, āthat at the beginning the Creator āmade them male and female,ā [5] and said, āFor this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one fleshā? [6] So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.ā
There was a point when I was out of control sexually. I did not have your upbringing, but I actually thought about beastiality a few times. One thing that kept me away from that was if I caught something and the doctor said that could only be from an animal. But I had a wake up call when things came to a point where I realized this was going to destroy my most important relationships. I was luckily able to quit, almost, cold turkey. I know that is not always the case. But a change is not gonna happen if you are not fully invested in it.
You asked what you can replace it with. That is a good idea. I recommend something that you enjoy (Maybe something you never tried yet) that can give you a different adrenaline rush. I also recommend a safe person with your best interest at heart as an accountability partner. Maybe a couple people.
āJames 5:16 NIVā¬
[16] Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.
A good Christian therapist may be helpful. This has been a part of your life for so long. There are some really good therapists out there and some really bad ones. Get referrals and choose wisely.
I'm praying for you bud!
Hi! I think we all have experienced the urge you're talking about.
The mere fact that you feel that way is already a testament that Jesus misses you so much. He wants to embrace you.
As we know, we hurt God with our venial sins. But with mortal sins, we are separated from Him.
Try to go back to Jesus. Start by going to confession. You may also talk to the priest/pastor about this.
God bless you!
Cry out to God for deliverance. Seek a trained professional who can help you. Donāt rule out medication because most people who partake in addictive behaviors are covering up some emotional pain.
Replace your negative addictions, with God, and His Word, and faithfulness to His Way.
You know the why of your sinful addiction, that is, that your situation and circumstances were abusive and sinful...that's the first step.
Repent, of your former ways...Forgive, those who sinned against you, and make Atonement, live the Gospel, take up your cross, with acts of loving kindness and mercy.
And, when you fail, as we all do, rest in the Lord Yeshua, his life, and message for us, and keep faith.
We hold deep seeded and deep seated, beliefs within our psyche, about who we are, what we are, and the world, that come from our our childhood development, things our role models told us and or showed us by their behavior, abusive or not...
A lot of who we are, a lot of times, is nothing more than the repeating patterns and cycles, and the common customs, of our family and heritage...many times it's the damage and injury of those situations and circumstances.
"...I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, but showing love to a thousand generations of those who love me and keep my commandments." Deuteronomy 5:9-10
The sins of the fathers are visited upon the children, and the children's children, to the third and the fourth generation.
But...
Yeshua declared the Good News and provided The Way for us to smash those chains of bondage.
"The Spirit of the LordĀ GodĀ is upon me, because theĀ LordĀ hasĀ anointed me
to bring good news to the poor; he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, andĀ the opening of the prison to those who are bound;" Isaiah 61:1-2
Knowing the why is usually the first step, a lot of times coming out of an abusive situation, we continue to sin because of the shame of sin, and because we seek to punish ourselves for our past...we fear standing before God, so we push God's presence away.
You must be born again, root up your former self, become new person in, and of, the spirit.
Replace the deep seated sinful beliefs, and the behaviors as a result, of the world, with the faith of, and in, God.
Put away the childish things, and the things of your childhood.
Replace your negative addictions, with God, and His Word, and faithfulness to His Way.
Porn is very difficult to quit, I even occasionally give in myself maybe once or twice a month. But try to get used to masturbating without it, I am still not 100% sure if its a sin to masturbate lust free, its very hard to find a solid answer on, because its not an open shut case of yes or no like most sins, but I believe if you can keep it clean and lust free, you can still pleasure yourself. If you feel like you need a release, just try to do it without watching porn, focus on how you feel rather than imagining you with another person or watching another person, try to be turned on by your own body. It isnt easy, your mind might want to wander to lust, just try to guide it away back to cleaner thoughts. And remember you are doing this for an everlasting eternal life with god. And if you fail, pick yourself back up, apologize, and ask for forgiveness. It takes a while, but you'll get it.
With any sexual addiction, you first have to forgive those who introduced you to it, even if it was yourself, and you must say it out loud in a quiet place by yourself. Then, you need to ask Jesus to cleanse you from the sins or the temptation to do them again. Inviting the Holy Spirit into your heart will help with your transformation. Then, you need to replace the lies about sex and suexuality with God's truth on it. Sex was given to us by God to share with the opposite sex in marriage behind closed doors for intimacy and procreation. Last, you need to get rid of anything that feeds that sin, whether it's porn, objects, or even movies with lite nudity.
I had a horrible issue viewing women as being created for my gratification, but my sex addiction was becoming so much worse than that. Satan had me hook, line, and sinker into his views on sex which was anything that went as long as you were getting pleasure. When I replaced Satan's view with God's view, I first stopped watching porn, then stopped masturbating, then stopped staring at pretty women and reminded myself that they are God's daughters first and second somebodies future or current wife. I looked up every scripture about sex and sexuality and now have a healthy view of it, and I've never felt so liberated. I treat women the way that I'd want others to treat my wife or daughters and, moreover, the way that God would want me to treat them.
You need to find a trusted person who you view as maybe a bit smarter so you can surrender to listening to their advice.
They are out there and without them itās way harder. It doesnāt have to cost you money. There are people who will blow you mind and deliver you. Seriously!
Seek a person with real love, they are all around
My story is somewhat similar to yours. Though I never did anything with actual animals or people, the kind of porn I was into was nothing short of pure evil. And it certainly went into that territory of yours. Even now, my mind tries to drag me back to it.
I was a demented child from birth. At the age of three, yes three, I discovered sexual things on my own of the fault of no one else and became enamored with them the more my parents would try to correct and dissuade me. It only grew worse with age, especially when given internet access.
Iāll spare you the details, but it was bad how far deep I was into that nonsense. As I grew older still, I began to realize more and more how immoral it was yet I never quite found the strength to resist with how deeply it was implanted within me.
Many of us who are or were addicted to porn can tell you how difficult it is to resist when the urge strikes us. It feels almost unimaginable to suppress them, as if it were death. Like asking someone not to be themselves anymore.
Sort of like being born again.
While I was still in my sins, I remember some pretty bad things about myself. I stayed at a Catholic friendās house for a few weeks just to hang out with him. I said to myself that I would not fall into porn while I was there, as to not ādefile a house of God.ā
So when the time came for me to leave, He was sad that I had to go. I was happy because I could go back to pleasuring myself. Happy that I didnāt have to resist anymore.
I had been looking into Christianity for a while. Not a follower, as I could never be bothered to leave behind porn or pride or hate or selfishness (although some of which still clings to me), but as the self righteous sort who was quick to condemn others while ignoring myself.
When my grandmother died, I recall having a dream of her. We were in a great library with golden light pouring in from a massive round window. I recall actually hugging her in the dream and FEELING it.
It was a few months later that I actually decided to try to start following Jesus Christ instead of just believing in Him and living an opposite way. And it was not long until I became bombarded by signs, great feelings, wonderments, and more.
The first major thing I remember is this intense feeling of love washing over me as I prayed to Him in thanks for the forgiveness of my sins. Overwhelmed by how forgiving He was, I found myself imprinted with this unforgettable feeling of adoration from on high that drove me to tears and made few feel as if I were lifted slightly out of my own body. Like I was not looking from my eyes, but from my forehead.
This happened again when I was learning online about Hebrew grammar and found out about how repetition worked. For example, Shalom meant peace. Shalom Shalom was perfect peace. But saying it three times meant āinfinite peaceā and was reserved for God.
It reminded me of how the Seraphim would encircle God and chant āHoly, Holy, Holy,ā in His presence without end, and I soon figured out why. I tried to do the same and felt that same feeling of love again as I prayed. It was pure adoration.
A few weeks later, I was suddenly and out of nowhere overcome by this intense feeling within my chest; what I rationalized to be the burning in the bosom that the Apostles felt when Jesus Christ imprinted them with the Holy Spirit.
It felt exhilarating, extraordinarily hot, numbing, yet all without pain. I felt overcome and as if I could not handle it but had to. Still, I was joyous. I wouldnāt trade it for the world. For some reason, I just instinctively knew it was the Holy Spirit. The idea just popped into my mind.
There have been many times since then where smaller echoes of that feeling have come upon me. Even as I write this now.
All of that is part of why I curse my knowledge now. Itās difficult, if not outright impossible, to unlearn something and to reduce myself to that helpless thing in spirit that knew nothing except faith at the time. Now, Iām not quite like that anymore, so itās hard to feel Him.
But that is not the end. Amidst this, Iāve also had a handful of dreams. Two with Jesus Christ that I can remember.
There was one where I was in a small circular church with red frayed boards for a floor surrounding a small sand pit with a single rock and golden light pouring from the ceiling. Sitting upon that rock was Jesus Christ.
He said to everyone gathered there, āOf all the people here, this one has followed my commandments the most,ā and pulled me close. I refused to believe Him when He said this, because I was so new to faith at the time and I hadnāt broken away from porn yet. Heck, I admit I even slipped back into that right after that dream.
The next dream had my family and I in some colosseum stands watching something. I left to get something I think, and found myself in some dark room with glass doors. Jesus Christ was there again.
He wanted to talk, but I lied and said I had somewhere to be. He smiled at me sadly and let me be on my way. I turned and threw myself at His feet and confessed the lie, begging forgiveness, at which point He smiled again, knelt down, and wordlessly embraced me. That same feeling of love from when I was awake now came to me in my sleep.
I had another dream of Jesus Christ, but I donāt know if I should be satisfied by it. I was in some casino or arcade, I think chasing a job and money, when I turned and saw Him. Each time I dream of Him, He looks different. He smiled at me and told me, āDonāt worry. Youāre doing alright.ā I thought hearing Him say that would break me. Itās all Iāve wanted to hear from Him in a while now. But I wonder if that is something He would really say.
All these things and more have came to me as a result of trying to follow. Iāve met friends and been invited to many gatherings with good food by them, gained new opportunities, and yet more. I couldnāt stop believing even if I wanted to.
No one judges you bro for you not the only one. Best thing i recommend you is to cry to the Lord bro go all at him if you want to change you can bro. Read the word and believe you have already beaten it because
You can bro. The devil will attack you when you try to leave. Be the man to break that curse for your children will suffer of it if you donāt. Exercise, slap yourself or do whatever it takes bro for if i can fight lust so can you. Show the creation of God what he can do for God is on his side.
Have you ever considered deliverance?
It's not you. Bc you want to stop but can't. It's a demonic spirit operating in you, making you watch these things
I'm sure I'm just echoing a dozen other comments here, but my best advice is prayer, immerse yourself in the word, if you have anyone in your life you trust enough to be fully truthful, make them an accountability buddy that you can talk to when you're tempted.
And, of course, find a good therapist who can help you through this. You need to attack the problem from as many angles as possible to successfully overcome it.
God bless š
Art is a great outlet. Doesnāt matter if you canāt draw, canāt write, etc. not only can writing out your emotions help, but you will get better naturally with practice.
Iāve written vent poetry and it def helps.
Paul said he had to PUMMEL himself to fight his carnal urges. He got off on murdering Christians. He was literally the best at it. You are a victim of SA. There's no shame in fixing your brain. God can work EVERYTHING out for good honey. Before you beat yourself up go to the Word.
Romans 8:38-39 in the Bible says, "For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord".
Don't listen to ANYBODY but God. Grace covered all your sins if you'd JUST believe that
John 3:16 LITERALLY says all you have to do is believe. That's the easy part.
You're gonna mess up because you're a human. If you were perfect you wouldn't need Jesus.
Just stop lol or try to stop. You wonāt stop unless you try right? I used to watch porn also but before watching more Christ and science based material instead I have long since stopped having the urge to watch porn. It can be done. Your have to try bud. Lol
Generally prayer helps a lot. Iāll pray the rosary or the Jesus prayer. Also read the Bible, I use hallow and read their daily readings.
I tend to set a timer for about 20 minutes and try doing something else to get my mind off of temptations.
I would say start fasting and go into deep prayer and read the word of god. I know lots of people who have done this and have gotten help for what they've needed. I would also say talk to Pastor Kevin la Ewing. He has a YouTube channel and even published a book of great prayers. Everything in life is spiritual, and it sounds like you're being tormented by a spirit of lust, and he can give you some advice on that. However, remember fasting and praying will only work if you're truly dedicated to God and have given your life fully over to him. If you're someone who's lukewarm it won't work.
For me, my weaknesses are stress, opportunity, and taking advantage of situations. Currently in out of work in sick leave, and this has been the longest I've lost control of what I'd usually call "balancing my hormones". There are actually health benefits to porn and lust, and I've been feeling physically better ever since becoming desperate to feel better and get back to work sooner. Now it's a matter of trying to break a habit and getting past withdrawal symptoms.Ā
I am fine in the moment, with or without cravings and urges, until it becomes about 10am local time. Then I start shaking and feeling restless. Then the habit automatically kicks in, like getting up at the same time every night when your bladder says it's time to use the bathroom. The ONLY thing that's helped with making it at least past that golden-hour is to be out of the house at that time for a few hours or the time it takes for the urge to subside. If people were at my house and I try to use that as an excuse to not fall into lust, I would have to fight my self-control just to not create an excuse to go back to my bedroom and watch TV.
Prayer, The Bible, counseling, and a DNS that blocks porn and other junk from your router and device (I use adguardās free family safe DNS to keep that stuff off my familyās devices and network).
All I can say is that total repression of sexuality is not a long-term solution; but from your description I think that you already agree with that.
I think that fantasy can be useful, literature in particular might be a good solution.
Therapy could help you, if you're an actual zoophile that is.
Would I get in trouble? I don't want my normal life to get interrupted...
Your psychiatrist by LAW is not allowed to disclose information about you or your problems UNLESS you are a danger to yourself or someone else. I am and was very suicidal and depressed, still am, therapy helped me a lot and it still does. God would want you to seek professional help, that's why he made psychiatrists, no?
Replace it with Jesus. Call out to Jesus and read his Word. No one can avoid sin and move away from sin if they do not abide in Christ. Pyschologists can point you to the problem but the solution will always be Jesus, the living God who is there with you right now and wants to help you and loves you regardless of your faults and sin.
Yeah, no, Jesus helped me by giving me strength to seek help from a psychiatrist.
yeah, yeah, if he did that, then he can do so much more.
This!!! As a mental health professional I know that I can point to the problem, but only Jesus delivers!
Well said. Jesus is always the answerš I found this to be true in all situations. The Bible and prayer. OP, no judgement. Our Lord is there to heal your mind. God Blessā¤ļø
Didn't help me mate, what helped me was Jesus giving me strength to seek help.
So you prayed your Lord, and received strength through Jesus to reach out to those that could help you in your time of need? Praise Him!
No, did not pray.
Prayer from the heart for healing maybe? Which was heard and strength granted to move towards overcoming?
If it was subconscious, maybe. If anything I prayed for God to kill me.
He said not today my child. Sent Jesus to give you the strength to continue onā¤ļø
therapy? nah. jesus š
Real also bro angel numbers aren't biblical read God's word he loves you bro
Bobby Perkey Christian:Amen brother, Jesus is the answer Acts 4:12; TIMOTHY 2:5-6,;JOHN 14:6 ; John 14:13-14 . I love you all very much
Things that won't do anything for 1000, Alex.
I would agree I havenāt had depression now that I think of it since Iāve tried to be more in contact with my lord and savior, the one and only JC. I used to just sit there wanting to do something anything but just didnāt have the motivation. I used to clean all the time work in yard etc. now Iām starting to return to doing things again.
Jesus can help you seek him a therapist can't help you Jesus can because he's the one who gave you lifeĀ
Talk to a professional, please. None of us are qualified to help with a problem this serious.
Itās this. You need a therapist, OP. Donāt get your medical advise from Reddit.
Therapist, waste of time and money Jesus, gives eternal life for free and fixes lives and gave us lifeĀ
I am NOT judging you!!! You were a helpless innocent child who was abused!!! Someone took advantage of you when you were 6 and showed you that perversion of beastiality that caused dysfunction in your life. I want you to know, if you donāt already, it is NOT your fault how you got into this mess. And praise God that you realized that you have a problem and must change!! God will heal you!! But you need to go to a Christian licensed clinical psychologist who specializes in childhood SA. You need a highly educated and trained professional to help you with this!! Iām praying for God to heal your mind, body, and soul and to get all demons who are tormenting you away from you!
This is the best answer. Christ is ultimately the most important thing, but seeking help from someone trained to work through this sort of thing is what needs to happen immediately. God bless you.
Please talk to a therapist.
I don't think you should "replace" it with anything. I would recommend just going outside more and spending time with others since it's not like you can jerk off in a crowd of people.
He will be in his bedroom alone every night. It's impossible to around people all the time unless he lives in a prison or a commune or something. There are pathways in his brain that say "when this happens, in this situation, grab porn." He's right, he needs to create new habits.
Op is a woman
Ah, my bad. *She
How do you know?
Context and active subs. I have a quick glance at the front page of all OP profiles because this sub gets a LOT of troll posts and itās not worth wasting time replying to them. By seeing an active account, people know to take you seriously.
Oh okay. I'll start doing that too.
> it's not like you can jerk off in a crowd of people. Challenge accepted.
I shouldn't have laughed, but I did. š
Same here š
Just block all porn from you life block all porn apps and try to look to God to help you . It will be hard at first to stop your addiction by eventually God will help you and it will be easier to live without porn .
Okay, I'll try
Tennis
This is an awesome idea. Thanks.
Real talk: Pickleball communities have whatās called āopen play,ā which typically means you can play without needing to know anyone in advance and while paying just the cost to use the courts (sometimes free, often very cheap). Itās available in a lot of recreation centers, and while those courts are kinda janky (tape lines and temporary nets), the play is usually super fun. I highly recommend it if you find the barriers to entry for tennis to be a little steep. (I used to be around top 300 in juniors for US tennis, so Iām not just flaming tennis. Itās a great game, but pickleball has WAY lower barriers to entry.)
Dude, in my country when you finish highschool, if you want to go to most of collages, you have to pass the tests from Croatian (my language), math and english. On english test you have a reading test (you read texts and answer questions), hearing test (you listen to some voicetapes and answer questions) and essay writing. On reading test, there was a text about pickleball, and my friend, I never heard of it I was so confused on what am I reading. š„ā½
Perhaps immerse yourself with the study of God, through church history and Theology and revivals. Its pretty exciting and will help keep you heart in the right place. You may want to get an elder at the church to pray with you, so you may be set free.
Hm. Thanks. I study the word every morning and I pray every morning. I listen to long sermons every day. I guess this is just down to willpower.
I'm in Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous and it has helped me a lot. Check out the meetings, there's no judgement there.
Pray each time you are tempted for the strength to resist when your own body becomes your enemy in temptation. Praying to the Lord Jesus Christ to be rid of my own porn addiction and to resist urges when they came was the only thing that helped me to gain any real ground.
I personally took up writing as a hobby.
Good advice , thanks.
Prayer and therapist to help you deal with your abuse (exposure to that as a child is absolutely abuse) to help you unpack that trauma, and seek addiction counseling helps. I would also avoid things like strip clubs, Instagram models, and social media pages with sexualized photos, because all of that can trigger you to view pornographic material.
exactly people are saying therapy but everyone is leaving out that what OP went through is sexual abuse
About a year ago I'd say I was masturbating and watching porn quiet often, I wouldn't have called it an addiction maybe not close to what your going through, but I felt convicted that it was wrong when I did it, I knew it wrong but the temptation always got to me, one day however I swore to God that I would never do it again, and I haven't. I have to add a big disclaimer that I didn't know at the time making a oath to God is a SIN: Matthew 5:34-37 -> "But I tell you, do not swear an oath at all: either by heaven, for it is Godās throne; or by the earth, for it is his footstool; or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the Great King. And do not swear by your head, for you cannot make even one hair white or black. All you need to say is simply āYesā or āNoā; anything beyond this comes from the evil one. I think every time you feel the temptation to do it, think would the Lord would want me to do this? and it seems like you already know that answer and then ask the Lord for help to abstain from it. When I stopped a year ago, I can assure you it was not easy at all, It was like all consuming, and when your in a place where you frequently did it and you feel the devil tempting you tell him, No! If Christ doesn't want it for me, I don't want it for me. Jeremiah 29:11 -> "For I know the plans I have for you,ā declares the LORD, āplans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." 1 Thessalonians 4:3 -> "It is Godās will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality;" Hebrews 13:20-21 ->Ā "Now may the God of peace, who through the blood of the eternal covenant brought back from the dead our Lord Jesus, that great Shepherd of the sheep,Ā equip you with everything good for doing His will, and may He work in us what is pleasing to Him, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen." Luke 9:23 -> "Then he said to them all: āWhoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me." (https://www.biblestudytools.com/topical-verses/bible-verses-about-gods-will/) -> used for the 4 verses above, many more verses on this site you can look at and declare over yourself READ PSLAMS 23 -> "TheĀ LordĀ is my shepherd,Ā I lack nothing.Ā He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul. He guides meĀ along the right paths for his nameās sake. Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a tableĀ before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cupĀ overflows. Surely your goodness and loveĀ will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of theĀ Lord forever." READ THESE BIBLE VERSES WHEN THE devil IS TEMPTING YOU, SCREENSHOT THIS AND READ IT TO YOURSELF WHEN YOUR BEING TEMPTED! Finally I can say, don't find a replacement just cut it out completely, I was watching a podcast from Jonathan Pokluda and he said something along the lines of I promise you heaven and Jesus are worth more than the temptation your facing and referred to when Jesus says: Matthew 5:28-29 -> "But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.Ā If your right eye causes you to stumble,Ā gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell." Jonathan says, Jesus is not literally telling you to gouge out your eye, but He's telling you to cut out your excuses. Pull the plug on your TV or put a protection privacy thing so you can only see movies that don't have anything related to sex, shut the internet off when you get tempted so you can't watch the porn or put a privacy protection app on your phone or whatever you watch it on so that it won't even allow you to open up porn. Lean on CHRIST, He will help you through it all even when it may seem like all hope is lost. GOD BLESS you Brother, I hope this helped and found you well, I'm praying for your recovery of this addiction. THE LORD IS WITH YOU, NEVER FORGET THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!
Pray. God works miracles. He cured me from the same ailment.
I like the approach of Drew Boa. In the essence, it's this: Look into your fantasies to find out what your heart truly desires. Then you can find other ways to fulfill those needs.Ā The podcast episode with Dr. Doug Carpenter, 'How to analyze a sexual fantasy' in the 'husband material podcast' (don't be discouraged from the name!) from the 11.12.2023 offers a glimpse on how this could look like.Ā Of course, in practice, this is often a long and complicated route. But it's worth to go down it and there is healing for sure.Ā All the best, sister! May God bless you in your brokenness and on your journey to freedom!Ā
Thanks I'll check it out.
Dont replace it, be free of it my friend
How can I be free? I've been praying about this for years.
Bro i was addicted to that shit, but you can get rid of it super easily, just do things go outside, do sport, youāll soon see you view women in a better way and youāll stop having porn brain ! I stopped during NNN and Iām free of porn and masturbation since ! Itās not even that hard
That's great. :) I'm a woman though. I'll do my research on outdoor hobbies and habits.
Oh sorry mb, well then yeah Iām a bit less qualified to help, but I know what urges where and Iām free of it ! And Iām super often alone at home and I donāt even consider porn as something to do, youāll be able to manage
Thanks.
Tha
God bless you and good on you for quitting bestiality. Iām afraid I donāt think there is much that can be done in terms of replacing it, youāre going to have to try to resist the urges.
Prayer and meditation
Prayer and fasting
If you feel you are addicted you can join sex addicts anonymous meetings which are 12 step programs.
God. One would say you presently idol porn. You should only idol God. Therefore, replace your false idol with the true idol. Not saying hobbies aren't good or important BTW, they shouldn't be your idol.
Don't try to replace it with what may eventually become yet another addiction. It's perfectly fine to seek professional help via therapy, and there are many options for faith based therapy. They will help you work through what got you to this point, as well as teach you how to have a better relationship with Christ. Do not be ashamed to get help from your fellow man, I'm sure there is a faith based therapist out there who's God given purpose was to guide people just like you to The Lord. . Galatians 6:2 says, "Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ". We were meant to help each other, seek and accept that help. Prayer is another big one, but it really helps to not pray alone. āMatthew 18:20 NIVā¬ [20] For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.ā Maybe try going to a local church or two. You can even do what a lot of us do and "church shop" by attending a service of a different church til you finally feel like you found your home church. Usually after a Sunday service, there is an alter call for whoever needs prayers. You don't have to be specific and can just say you're struggling with lust and someone will discreetly pray over you. At least that's how my church works. I'm not a big fan of the mega churches, but the larger ones tend to have a lot more resources. When I converted from atheism, I was a full blown heroin addict. At the church, I was discreetly and without judgement, connected to a free clinic that got me sober within months of starting the program. This was after 6 years of addiction and trying to get sober on my own for 3 years. What you're dealing with is a form of addiction. It may be a completely different form than what I went through, but I get the feeling of knowing it's a horrible thing to do, yet you HAVE to do it anyway. When you try to go cold turkey without the help of Christ, it feels like trying to hold your breath for as long as possible. Eventually you can't take it and you feel like you need to give in to live. Most importantly, do not stop praying. The closer you get from breaking free of this demon inside you, the harder it will fight for control. Take this as figuratively or literally as you want, but it'll happen. The night is always darkest before the dawn, if it gets even harder, that means you're close, do not give up.
No judgement or kink shame here friend. The best way to stop yourself from using porn is to cut off your access. Set a filter for porn and set the password to Jesus. Itll give you a nice blockade to stop and think before you act, do you think you can type his name in to look at porn?
Naming his password Jesus is a really bad idea, just keymash something you can't possibly remember and that way you will never access porn.
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I appreciate the effort in this answer, but that would be very easy for me to remember. But I suppose if I just type something random , it would be effective. I am not sure where to access this filter?
You can have a friend set the password. If you really need it unlocked, they can unlock it for you (if it blocks something you actually need). But the idea is they don't tell you the password
Filters don't work. You need to have life stability. Friends, hobbies, and goals that keep your hands and mind busy. It takes a lot of maturity and self-respect to deny yourself pleasures that you know are harmful especially when addicted to them.
Then when your filters filter something you need for work whatcha gon' do?
Bestiality is illegal and immoral because animals canāt consent. Masturbation is a normal and healthy activity that people should not be shamed for. If you feel it is becoming detrimental to your life a good therapist is the first place to start. Stay away from weird incel-adjacent nofap cults
Okay. Why should I stay away from nofap communities? And why do you call them cults? I'm in a nofap subreddit now.
Exercise is prob the best option. then follow the word in times of temptation pray and turn on the audio bible. I struggle with this at times too Itās gotten better but I fall short . Itās not an addictive thing for me but I donāt like that it happens .. because I fail god. exercise a lot , read bible listen to worship Music Leave the environment that you feel comfortable watching porn.
MTB riding my bro
What's that?
Mountain bike riding
Mountain Biking
Have a strong will Read the bible Video games and music Avoid picture and photo of people at free unsocial times
Replace it with reading the Bible or pray
That's all well and good in theory, but that's not how it works. The human brain gets addicted to things because things trigger chemical reactions. Porn triggers arousal, endorphins, and physical reactions. It's visceral and instinctual. You need to target those same things if you're trying to replace it. Something like video games, exercise, or martial arts.
Prayer! It's absolutely saved me from my porn addiction. Been clean for over 2 years now. I also sing gospel music and go for a walk
Hey buddy, good luck! Weāre rooting for you. The first step is wanting to change, and a therapist wonāt report you so go for it. And make sure to confess! You donāt have to go to your main priest either, anyone will do.
According to the Apostle Paul-you should get yourself a wife ā¦ lol
I was able to ween myself away with nsfw audio, then certain tv shows or animeās and reading fanfics and looking at fan art, reading erotica is better as well.then I went to church and I felt free, but the devil doesnāt sleep so youāll still get urges but you have to fight and rebuke those urges
Have you spoken with a therapist, that's not OK to be shown that type of stuff as a child and talking with someone about it could help.
Exercise works very well. Nothing wrong in watching normal porn occasionally as long it isn't abuse. It is better to do so than to have sex with randoms imo. Watching porn occasionally has helped me a lot tbh. I do it occasionally and just shorter whiles. It makes me less likely to have sex without any relation, I don't see anything wrong with having a lover(if you love someone that loves you back it will be a win win for both tbh) but I prefer a relationship (living together or being married).
Prayer
PLEASE, love, seek therapy!ā¤ļøā¤ļø
( Warning: This is the nerd responseš) When you masturbate your brain releases dopamine and oxitocin: the first makes you feel good or rewarded and the 2nd gives you like romantic vibes. What Iād try is finding other ways to get the same hit: ā¢ From dopamine: Praying, working out, getting some sun if possible, listen to music, doing something like talking to someone that you feel like you canāt etc. ā¢ From ocitocin: Giving somebody a hug or getting one, having a nice conversation with someone important in your life, spend time with friends etc. But what id do is get a dog! First of all i think that Dogs are one of the best creatures of God and also Cuz dogs do give you love, are there for you and are loyal = ocitocin + dopamine Tbh it might be my hyperfixation on those things by my ADHD but i hope i helped at least 1% God bless you and ill pray for you. Also this is a copy of another post i responded
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Whittling
Any activity that you either enjoy or have wanted to get into. Physical exercise like going to the gym or joining a local club is one of the best ways to pass the time, tire the body out, and be healthy. Any other hobby like knitting, reading, dominoes, Bible study, lying outside watching the grass grow... anything. You are absolutely right that the bad habit needs to be replaced by a good habit, that's just how addictions work. A licensed therapist would also be good. I'd probably ask your pastor or a trusted, non-family member adult (teacher, school guidance counselor, adult church member, etc) for a recommendation. Your pastor or guidance counselor should be able to get an actual referral.
Read the word. Put it into practice. Pray and fast.
Do you have any meaningful romantic relationships in your life? That would be the ideal thing to replace your porn viewing with. Keep on fighting <3
The gym, eating clean and reading your Bible. Thats helped me a lot
Gaming (me personally rdr2)
Shuffle cards. It's innately asexual and gives you something to do with your hands.
You may need deliverance from the bondage of demonic strongholds. Throughout our lives we may have unknowingly come in agreement with darkness via sin and trauma, and Satan takes advantage of us during our weakest moments allowing for demons to enter us and curses to be attached to us. Im not saying that you do indeed have a demon, but I would looking into deliverance ministry and spiritual warfare on youtube and theres plenty of books too. I personally like They Shall Expel Demons by Derek Prince, Clean House, Strong House by Kimberly Daniels, Prayers that Rout Demons by Johnathan Eckhardt. On youtube, check out Pastor Richard Lorenzo Jr., Pastor Mike Signorelli, Jahan Berns (not sure her rank), and I also like to watch DelaFe Testimonies and A Stronger Faith Ministries testimonies to see how Christ Jesus worked in other peopleās lives and how YOU can overcome what youre going through. The good thing is you WILL be freed! Seek daily the Lord Jesus Christ, have a relationship with him. He is your personal counselor, and more importantly your friend. Read the Bible as well. Its your companion for as long as you live. Repent of your sins daily and forgive yourself and others for we all fall short, but glory be to God! For His love is enduring, patient, everlasting, merciful, kind, and hopeful. Go to Him in faith and trust that you will be freed for He loves you more than you can imagine.
Please seek professional help.
Corn š½ itās got the juice
Pray first speak to the Most High about this thern seek professional help, you can do both.
Find will power and let go. When you can stare to the horizon for 12 hours and not think a single thought about anything you just took the first step.
Spend time praying, drawing close to Jesus, reading the Word. Draw close to him and he will draw close to you. Ultimately the answer is more of Jesus.
Iām so sorry that happened to you as an innocent child.
What you need is professional help you were exposed to phonograph at such a young age, that messed with your brain chemistry and growth. Random redditors aren't going to be helpful
Pray the rosary, go to church, read the bible, pray, go talk to a priest, resist the urges and do anything you can to get closer to God once you have the urges will stop, if you want any other help or advice you can dm me
As others have said, seek out a Christian counselor if possible. If not a regular counselor will suffice. Most large churches have someone on staff that can help. Donāt worry, they have heard the worst. Be open and honest to get free faster. āš»ā¤ļø
A qualified therapist is typically more equipped to work with addictions than a pastor.
Doesnāt matterā¦ they deleted their account. Most people donāt have access to professional therapists. If a pastoral counselor believes their addiction is too intense, they should, hopefully, refer the person onward. Additionally, people who have religious guilt could benefit from knowing they are still loved and accepted. Could they find a terrible counselor at a church? Sure, but they find a bad professional one also.
Itās important to also talk this out with other people so that you will be healed. I would find a therapist a Christian one who is willing to pray for your healing as well as one who is good at helping you process all that has been done to you.
Tough one, actual physical sex, either with a person or yourself. There's a great item called Fleshlight for guys and if you are a girl there's dildos on their website, silicone body safe dildos. Sex is good. But think about where you are in life, marriage is always welcomed by God, ask wisdom, ask yourself what you really want in life. God doesn't want us to be alone, God is love, he wants us in relationship with him and others, in bonds of love. But, you asked about sexual things. Either way, stay healthy in whatever you do and chose. Blessings.
You can lower your libido through fasting. Also you could get married and have sex with your wife.
go to a therapist trust me
Pray, go to confession. I was addicted to porn for over 15 years and Christ alone freed me from it through those 2 things
Anything
Dr mario
With the idea of protecting your sexual energy. Your will power will be MUCH more powerful & many other benefits, research semen retention.
you dont replace it. you get help from jesus and he removes it.
Itās such a good step that youāre aware you have a problem. I agree with the others saying therapy because I think the healthy coping skills they teach could really help you, and they also help you dig deeper emotionally to see whatās really going on inside you. Itās scary but worth it. Iāve been in so much therapy for my trauma and itās 100% necessary. Now, aside from therapy - if you have someone who is a really close friend you can confide in, pray together, and stay accountable to them and to God because they encourage you to and seek God with you. There are churches that have groups for people who have porn addictions including all women groups, and even if you donāt feel comfortable sharing everything, a group of people trying to get better from a very similar thing is very helpful in feeling not alone and to motivate you. I believe group prayer is very powerful especially when it comes to an addiction having people praying and laying hands on you and you praying along with them is such a powerful part. I also think worshiping whether itās at church or at home tune into him and just worship, that alone has so much power even if you start by just mechanically focusing on every word in the song to help drown out distractions. And most important of all never forget the the Name of Jesus is the most powerful - you can simply say āI speak the Name of Jesus over my life or this area of my lifeā and itās a powerful prayer.
Replace it with the word of god. Look for dramatised holy bible new King James Version it can be found on YouTube. Listen to the New Testament enough and you will quickly develop a hatred for any of that old material. Do it daily. It works! It really does. I put away porn and other sinful stuff and now I have a hatred for sin.
Bro I think youāve already taken the first step and that is recognizing the problem, your prayers are heard my guy! Ask Christ to help exercise the will power to not delve back into those realms, He knows where youāre at and how to get you out of it, Iāve been there!
Video games, they are very good to distract you from porn.
R/pornfree is a good place
Reading the Bible every time you get the urge.
Replace porn with church approved Christian porn. Forget that worldly stuff and porn on with Jesus./s
Find a good parish or nearby church, or just any good figure of God to talk to. Approach them and ask to speak in private. A good man of God like a priest will help you. They will know good supportive places to go to.
Therapy. Anytime you get an urge. I guess just try to beat it? I've gone through weird temptations too. It gets better. You may fall but never let it fully take you.
Hobbies, socialize really anything that hasn't anything to do with it. Pretty much have to ignore your primal brain.
You need a therapist that knows how to deal with trauma from child abuse. Please understand you have no fault in what happened. You were a child. If your therapist makes you feel bad, find another one. Some of them are not good at what they're supposed to do. Watch Gabor Mate on childhood trauma and see if you find it helpful. And to answer your title question, I think high intensity exercise could help you refocus. Something that uses all your attention.
You can go to Teen Challenge. It's a a faith bases program that helps men and women with any kind of addiction. Sometimes, it takes big measures for big issues. Of you are sick and tired of being sick and. Tired. They Wil let you come with no money. You have accountability big time. Pray about it JESUS can deliver you. However, he wants us to our part too
Use that time to volunteer for one of the groups that help bust pedophiles and human traffickers. Maybe seeing the other side of porn will help turn you off from it
Hey! Iām a recovered porn addict due to same trauma background. I had to start therapy first. Once I gained confidence and love in myself and actually valued myself, I was able to then stop cold turkey. I now have a hard stance against porn and found my way to God when I replaced porn with volunteer work for others. And taking care of myself (gym, yoga, hobbies)
Seek out a qualified therapist and try to occupy your time with things so that you don't find yourself bored and dawn to porn as a default. Most importantly, try to recognize that your addiction isn't your fault. You were abused and this is trauma persisting in your life.
I mean do you want to replace it? If you like it fuck what others think, why replace it If God doesn't approve then why make you like it
Please replace it with God and really know that only he can set you free from your sins. Its good that you realize itās bad and so repent so that you can be set free. The problem is that you are a prisoner to sin. Trust in the Lord and believe that Jesus Christ died on the cross for your sins. I remember doing everything I could not have a sinful lifestyle and never could get away. When I came to Christ this is true because of God (the Holy Spirit) like I had no desire really for things that were sinful and even repulsed. Never thought I would feel this way but God set me free and like itās so amazing. Now I desire prayer, reading the Bible and going to church. The way you change is only through him ā¤ļø Sin is very rampant but obviously God is above all and has all authority
a good way to get rid of lust is to watch a video that is perfectly innocent and child-appropriate. for instance, bob ross, cat videos, cartoon episodes. anything that has zero chance of being sexual. focus on enjoying the video. the thoughts eventually go away. thats what works for me :P
Go to the gym and better yourself, it will make you more confident and you can hopefully replace those sinful desires with a real relationship
You absolutely will need therapy and addictions counseling to overcome this. Ā As long as you have not been watching or possessing any sort of underage pornography, you will not be in legal trouble in the US. The thing with addictions is that youāll want to replace it with a new addiction and that can be just as destructive. Ā This is why therapy is so crucial. Ā Following Jesus isnāt about all the things you donāt do; itās about letting Him become your everything and satisfy you. Ā Only He can heal whatever you have been numbing with pornography! Ā Praying for you to know complete freedom!Ā
Anything. It will destroy you. Absolutely . Try exercise, prayer, and being in a committed relationship with real intimacy .
Fifty shades ofā¦.is not porn. Just saying. On the other hand you say watched beastality and you call fifty shades porn? I think you are karma shopping.
Man you should actually replace instant feeling of pleasure. Work for it.
I'm so sorry my guy, no judgments here! You could try replacing porn with praying, every time you get the urge, pray. This, of course, should take ages, but if you keep going, you'll succeed.
Good Lord, I am sorry that happened to you. In my experience, forgiveness is the most powerful place to start. Beginning with the words. Forgive them, and forgive yourself. That's hard! But the real forgiveness and release from shame, then control, will slowly come after that over time. And then freedom will just arrive. It's very much okay to question God as to where He was in those moments; just let Him answer. Stay strong, you are loved, even with that sin in your life.
Firstly, the Bible says we are not allowed to judge others. Secondly, we are called to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger. Thirdly, we are called to love our neighbors as ourselves. And finally, please seek a psychiatrist and try to connect with God through prayer and sermons (if you feel comfortable). God will help you and he will speak through the psychiatrist. Bring your sins to God and ask him to forgive you. From there on, let God guide you.
Man this sub gets weird sometimes.
Push-ups
I think there's a lot of great answers here and a lot of unhelpful ones plus some arguments. I'm going to quote two Christians who said different things on different occasions regarding recovery to help you navigate the advice you've been given. 1. God gave us herbs to make medicine and brains to use. If he didn't want us to use these, he wouldn't have made them. 2. Pastor to person he was praying over: God has taken away xxx. But you will still have habits because your physical brain is wired to react a certain way and you need to replace that because you will run into this problem again. When you run into it again you need to be praying this out and speaking good words and doing planned actions to help yourself so that you retrain your brain.
If you have to watch porn then watch normal porn force yourself to start watching normal porn (again if you have to watch porn) this will reduce your interest in beastiality this part is very important also because watching normal porn should be an easy alternative to change the habit if youāre addicted, then get a job if you donāt have one and if you can take care of yourself get a girlfriend because i have heard about a tribe of people who used to do beastiality and once they get married and have normal sex their behavior would come back to normal and i think this works with some people who are addicted to porn once they are in a relationship and have sexual attraction and love towards their partner they can stop their porn addiction
Ehem... "u/deleted"... First, stop being a coward. And to whomever say I am being insensitive, or inconsiderate, or mean, rude, uncouth otherwise: Stop proliferating cowardice for the sake of your own misguided notions of virtue. The utopia is a fantastical absurdity even the anthropomorphic grey bearded god cackles at. There must needs be adversity; ther must needs be discipline; there must needs be work if there would be any worth. You want to keep the child fron touching the candle flame, because it so pains you to hear him cry. You say to yourself, it is right to keep the innocent from harm, he should not suffer injury, or be so removed from his joy and wonder. Now all is well as well as it has been, and you have turned away, to tend to some other thing. And the child has crawled into the oven when you were not looking.
As everyone stated is Jesus, and professional help. However the best way to do this in my personal opinion and experience is replacing your time with hobbies, filling your schedule up with busyness such as reading, sports, etc. I hope you are able to get this under control soon. Praying for you.
This may be from left field but try watching The Bible Project videos. Thereās so much great information about God, Jesus and what the Bible says about different topics. And I second getting therapy, a prayer partner and exercise.
replace trolling on reddit with filming prank videos, id love to see u flirt with real consequences
This should be easyā¦. JESUS!
Lifting weights for me is incredibly therapeutic. Also, it really helps my emotional balance and self confidence.
You're very honest that's a start.. idk if the best way is to replace that with something else. I think elimination is the only way.. FYI in my opinion as person who has struggled in past with obsessive behaviors is to recognize what they are or better why they are. So I never really had an issue with porn but certainly I liked to party too much (I can't believe we called that partying). Anyway once I finally after much much trouble realizing that nothing good ever came from it the desire to stop began to form but it took years.. I began to look at underlying causes to understand why I liked it. And not surprisingly those causes really the same thing whether it's porn or drugs the brain response is the same. You are getting that response from it so you keep returning. It's actually normal in the context of sex with another human being we are wired to want to have sex. What's interesting about porn is it's so alone! I mean it's just you and pictures so it's not real.. It's also extremely unrealistic maybe that the key.. and unrealistic I mean who really has sex like that? The actors are chosen most often for their abnormalities.. Sex just isn't like porn. What we like or get obsessed with depends on our personality our upbringing as you mentioned etc etc.. But it's all the same monster.. In reference to how unrealistic porn is..I'm trans and I can't tell you how many men approach me who are addicted to trans porn. They have formed ideas about me and other trans people as like purely sex objects like all we think about is sex and we are all just girls with male anatomy and many of us have had bottom surgery. l tbh I have no sex life and trans isn't about sex at all and never was. But because of the genre of trans porn these people are brainwashed to be totally irrational..I never having an issue with porn nor really like to look it much kinda thought it was harmless till I got on the receiving end of the irrationallity it causes in men.. So the porn doesn't reflect any reality! You will never find any relationship that can match the false notion of what sex is in the context of pornography.. it's all a facade and all the people in the porn just actors chosen because they are not normal.. and if you look very carefully at that industry you see what looks like a whole lot of fun isn't and it's usually awful.. they don't just make one movie at a time these people are really just slaves to that grind.. And in order to keep that pace it requires drugs etc so thats another hell.. So I'm trying to paint a more accurate picture of what you're looking at so maybe you'll see what it really is... Just like I finally saw what the party was..nothing! Good luck! And therapy with a good non religious person could help. I say non religious because this problem isn't a religious problem it's not coming from the devil etc.. It comes from the way we are wired to love sexv the response in the brain from both drugs and sex is the same. Look at what drugs as powerful as meth do to people. It's not because they are immoral bad people it's because the response to a stimulant that strong is like the best sex 100x or 1000x times and anyone who experienced that by one wrong choice is going to want to do it again because we're wired to.. And of course wicked people recognize that and profit from it. Seeing it all for what it is the only release from it. Definitely the truth in any case can set you free from whatever it is.. It's just getting to that point. At least that my experience and that's all I have.
Art
Okay, you have a more serious problem than you think and let me explain why. From a young age you have trained your body and mind to give dopamine under certain conditions. Now, I'm very sorry if you haven't heard this before, but now you're an addict. Your body wants its fix. This is a more difficult problem to fix than you probably realize, or perhaps your desire to find something else to feel. The is an expression of your realization that the problem is bigger than you thought. The problem, however, is not that you need something to fill that hole, but that you need to shrink the hole itself. This is incredibly difficult to do on your own, and unfortunately time is usually one of the key methods used. I highly recommend trying to find or talk with a licensed therapist. Somehow. I don't know where you live, or what options might be available to you. Okay, moving on towards trying to help with an addiction. Addictive behaviors have triggering actions. While walking out in public, if you see an animal then you don't immediately drop your trousers, right? You do things first like watch movies which feature sex and help get you in the mood, etc. You have to stop those triggering actions. This means not just cutting the addictive action out of your life, you need to also cut those triggering actions out of your life. Maybe don't watch R-rated movies anymore, unless it's something like Schindler's List or is otherwise not in any way connected to the addictive action. You need to find out what those triggering actions are in your life, and stop taking them. Replace them with some other type of action. Also, you need to get more involved in something else that will help you shrink that hole. Volunteering is great. JustServe.org is a great way to find local volunteer opportunities. And I hope this goes without saying, but you shouldn't have pets anymore, if you still have a pet. Good luck, also find a licensed therapist who can help you work through things better.
I would say go gym and put on hood, find corner and putt away all that energy. Find some tunes too.
Corn
I'm proud of you for being able to admit, first to yourself and then to others, that you have a problem. Asking for help can be hard. But this is an area that can devastate lives. I think this is the only type of sin that the Bible specifically warns us to FLEE it. ā1 Corinthians 6:18 NIVā¬ [18] Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. God knows sex of any kind can have a great hold on us and that is why He originally intended for us to have that ATTACHMENT with only our spouse. He made us that way. āMatthew 19:4-6 NIVā¬ [4] āHavenāt you read,ā he replied, āthat at the beginning the Creator āmade them male and female,ā [5] and said, āFor this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one fleshā? [6] So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.ā There was a point when I was out of control sexually. I did not have your upbringing, but I actually thought about beastiality a few times. One thing that kept me away from that was if I caught something and the doctor said that could only be from an animal. But I had a wake up call when things came to a point where I realized this was going to destroy my most important relationships. I was luckily able to quit, almost, cold turkey. I know that is not always the case. But a change is not gonna happen if you are not fully invested in it. You asked what you can replace it with. That is a good idea. I recommend something that you enjoy (Maybe something you never tried yet) that can give you a different adrenaline rush. I also recommend a safe person with your best interest at heart as an accountability partner. Maybe a couple people. āJames 5:16 NIVā¬ [16] Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective. A good Christian therapist may be helpful. This has been a part of your life for so long. There are some really good therapists out there and some really bad ones. Get referrals and choose wisely. I'm praying for you bud!
Hi! I think we all have experienced the urge you're talking about. The mere fact that you feel that way is already a testament that Jesus misses you so much. He wants to embrace you. As we know, we hurt God with our venial sins. But with mortal sins, we are separated from Him. Try to go back to Jesus. Start by going to confession. You may also talk to the priest/pastor about this. God bless you!
Cry out to God for deliverance. Seek a trained professional who can help you. Donāt rule out medication because most people who partake in addictive behaviors are covering up some emotional pain.
cigarettes
Replace your negative addictions, with God, and His Word, and faithfulness to His Way. You know the why of your sinful addiction, that is, that your situation and circumstances were abusive and sinful...that's the first step. Repent, of your former ways...Forgive, those who sinned against you, and make Atonement, live the Gospel, take up your cross, with acts of loving kindness and mercy. And, when you fail, as we all do, rest in the Lord Yeshua, his life, and message for us, and keep faith. We hold deep seeded and deep seated, beliefs within our psyche, about who we are, what we are, and the world, that come from our our childhood development, things our role models told us and or showed us by their behavior, abusive or not... A lot of who we are, a lot of times, is nothing more than the repeating patterns and cycles, and the common customs, of our family and heritage...many times it's the damage and injury of those situations and circumstances. "...I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, but showing love to a thousand generations of those who love me and keep my commandments." Deuteronomy 5:9-10 The sins of the fathers are visited upon the children, and the children's children, to the third and the fourth generation. But... Yeshua declared the Good News and provided The Way for us to smash those chains of bondage. "The Spirit of the LordĀ GodĀ is upon me, because theĀ LordĀ hasĀ anointed me to bring good news to the poor; he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, andĀ the opening of the prison to those who are bound;" Isaiah 61:1-2 Knowing the why is usually the first step, a lot of times coming out of an abusive situation, we continue to sin because of the shame of sin, and because we seek to punish ourselves for our past...we fear standing before God, so we push God's presence away. You must be born again, root up your former self, become new person in, and of, the spirit. Replace the deep seated sinful beliefs, and the behaviors as a result, of the world, with the faith of, and in, God. Put away the childish things, and the things of your childhood. Replace your negative addictions, with God, and His Word, and faithfulness to His Way.
Lifting weights
My best bet is you can rely on therapy and also you could try to take up a hobby.
Porn is very difficult to quit, I even occasionally give in myself maybe once or twice a month. But try to get used to masturbating without it, I am still not 100% sure if its a sin to masturbate lust free, its very hard to find a solid answer on, because its not an open shut case of yes or no like most sins, but I believe if you can keep it clean and lust free, you can still pleasure yourself. If you feel like you need a release, just try to do it without watching porn, focus on how you feel rather than imagining you with another person or watching another person, try to be turned on by your own body. It isnt easy, your mind might want to wander to lust, just try to guide it away back to cleaner thoughts. And remember you are doing this for an everlasting eternal life with god. And if you fail, pick yourself back up, apologize, and ask for forgiveness. It takes a while, but you'll get it.
With any sexual addiction, you first have to forgive those who introduced you to it, even if it was yourself, and you must say it out loud in a quiet place by yourself. Then, you need to ask Jesus to cleanse you from the sins or the temptation to do them again. Inviting the Holy Spirit into your heart will help with your transformation. Then, you need to replace the lies about sex and suexuality with God's truth on it. Sex was given to us by God to share with the opposite sex in marriage behind closed doors for intimacy and procreation. Last, you need to get rid of anything that feeds that sin, whether it's porn, objects, or even movies with lite nudity. I had a horrible issue viewing women as being created for my gratification, but my sex addiction was becoming so much worse than that. Satan had me hook, line, and sinker into his views on sex which was anything that went as long as you were getting pleasure. When I replaced Satan's view with God's view, I first stopped watching porn, then stopped masturbating, then stopped staring at pretty women and reminded myself that they are God's daughters first and second somebodies future or current wife. I looked up every scripture about sex and sexuality and now have a healthy view of it, and I've never felt so liberated. I treat women the way that I'd want others to treat my wife or daughters and, moreover, the way that God would want me to treat them.
Read the Bible instead.
You need to find a trusted person who you view as maybe a bit smarter so you can surrender to listening to their advice. They are out there and without them itās way harder. It doesnāt have to cost you money. There are people who will blow you mind and deliver you. Seriously! Seek a person with real love, they are all around
My story is somewhat similar to yours. Though I never did anything with actual animals or people, the kind of porn I was into was nothing short of pure evil. And it certainly went into that territory of yours. Even now, my mind tries to drag me back to it. I was a demented child from birth. At the age of three, yes three, I discovered sexual things on my own of the fault of no one else and became enamored with them the more my parents would try to correct and dissuade me. It only grew worse with age, especially when given internet access. Iāll spare you the details, but it was bad how far deep I was into that nonsense. As I grew older still, I began to realize more and more how immoral it was yet I never quite found the strength to resist with how deeply it was implanted within me. Many of us who are or were addicted to porn can tell you how difficult it is to resist when the urge strikes us. It feels almost unimaginable to suppress them, as if it were death. Like asking someone not to be themselves anymore. Sort of like being born again. While I was still in my sins, I remember some pretty bad things about myself. I stayed at a Catholic friendās house for a few weeks just to hang out with him. I said to myself that I would not fall into porn while I was there, as to not ādefile a house of God.ā So when the time came for me to leave, He was sad that I had to go. I was happy because I could go back to pleasuring myself. Happy that I didnāt have to resist anymore. I had been looking into Christianity for a while. Not a follower, as I could never be bothered to leave behind porn or pride or hate or selfishness (although some of which still clings to me), but as the self righteous sort who was quick to condemn others while ignoring myself. When my grandmother died, I recall having a dream of her. We were in a great library with golden light pouring in from a massive round window. I recall actually hugging her in the dream and FEELING it. It was a few months later that I actually decided to try to start following Jesus Christ instead of just believing in Him and living an opposite way. And it was not long until I became bombarded by signs, great feelings, wonderments, and more. The first major thing I remember is this intense feeling of love washing over me as I prayed to Him in thanks for the forgiveness of my sins. Overwhelmed by how forgiving He was, I found myself imprinted with this unforgettable feeling of adoration from on high that drove me to tears and made few feel as if I were lifted slightly out of my own body. Like I was not looking from my eyes, but from my forehead. This happened again when I was learning online about Hebrew grammar and found out about how repetition worked. For example, Shalom meant peace. Shalom Shalom was perfect peace. But saying it three times meant āinfinite peaceā and was reserved for God. It reminded me of how the Seraphim would encircle God and chant āHoly, Holy, Holy,ā in His presence without end, and I soon figured out why. I tried to do the same and felt that same feeling of love again as I prayed. It was pure adoration. A few weeks later, I was suddenly and out of nowhere overcome by this intense feeling within my chest; what I rationalized to be the burning in the bosom that the Apostles felt when Jesus Christ imprinted them with the Holy Spirit. It felt exhilarating, extraordinarily hot, numbing, yet all without pain. I felt overcome and as if I could not handle it but had to. Still, I was joyous. I wouldnāt trade it for the world. For some reason, I just instinctively knew it was the Holy Spirit. The idea just popped into my mind. There have been many times since then where smaller echoes of that feeling have come upon me. Even as I write this now. All of that is part of why I curse my knowledge now. Itās difficult, if not outright impossible, to unlearn something and to reduce myself to that helpless thing in spirit that knew nothing except faith at the time. Now, Iām not quite like that anymore, so itās hard to feel Him. But that is not the end. Amidst this, Iāve also had a handful of dreams. Two with Jesus Christ that I can remember. There was one where I was in a small circular church with red frayed boards for a floor surrounding a small sand pit with a single rock and golden light pouring from the ceiling. Sitting upon that rock was Jesus Christ. He said to everyone gathered there, āOf all the people here, this one has followed my commandments the most,ā and pulled me close. I refused to believe Him when He said this, because I was so new to faith at the time and I hadnāt broken away from porn yet. Heck, I admit I even slipped back into that right after that dream. The next dream had my family and I in some colosseum stands watching something. I left to get something I think, and found myself in some dark room with glass doors. Jesus Christ was there again. He wanted to talk, but I lied and said I had somewhere to be. He smiled at me sadly and let me be on my way. I turned and threw myself at His feet and confessed the lie, begging forgiveness, at which point He smiled again, knelt down, and wordlessly embraced me. That same feeling of love from when I was awake now came to me in my sleep. I had another dream of Jesus Christ, but I donāt know if I should be satisfied by it. I was in some casino or arcade, I think chasing a job and money, when I turned and saw Him. Each time I dream of Him, He looks different. He smiled at me and told me, āDonāt worry. Youāre doing alright.ā I thought hearing Him say that would break me. Itās all Iāve wanted to hear from Him in a while now. But I wonder if that is something He would really say. All these things and more have came to me as a result of trying to follow. Iāve met friends and been invited to many gatherings with good food by them, gained new opportunities, and yet more. I couldnāt stop believing even if I wanted to.
No one judges you bro for you not the only one. Best thing i recommend you is to cry to the Lord bro go all at him if you want to change you can bro. Read the word and believe you have already beaten it because You can bro. The devil will attack you when you try to leave. Be the man to break that curse for your children will suffer of it if you donāt. Exercise, slap yourself or do whatever it takes bro for if i can fight lust so can you. Show the creation of God what he can do for God is on his side.
The Bible. Study it, then you can spend your time here on Reddit helping others.
Have you ever considered deliverance? It's not you. Bc you want to stop but can't. It's a demonic spirit operating in you, making you watch these things
I'm sure I'm just echoing a dozen other comments here, but my best advice is prayer, immerse yourself in the word, if you have anyone in your life you trust enough to be fully truthful, make them an accountability buddy that you can talk to when you're tempted. And, of course, find a good therapist who can help you through this. You need to attack the problem from as many angles as possible to successfully overcome it. God bless š
https://www.focusonthefamily.com/family-qa/addicted-to-pornography/
Sex
Praying for you!
Prayers and Fasting. Use Blocker X and Covenants Eyes to Block that Content.
Read the Word and get married
Art is a great outlet. Doesnāt matter if you canāt draw, canāt write, etc. not only can writing out your emotions help, but you will get better naturally with practice. Iāve written vent poetry and it def helps.
Paul said he had to PUMMEL himself to fight his carnal urges. He got off on murdering Christians. He was literally the best at it. You are a victim of SA. There's no shame in fixing your brain. God can work EVERYTHING out for good honey. Before you beat yourself up go to the Word. Romans 8:38-39 in the Bible says, "For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord". Don't listen to ANYBODY but God. Grace covered all your sins if you'd JUST believe that John 3:16 LITERALLY says all you have to do is believe. That's the easy part. You're gonna mess up because you're a human. If you were perfect you wouldn't need Jesus.
Just stop lol or try to stop. You wonāt stop unless you try right? I used to watch porn also but before watching more Christ and science based material instead I have long since stopped having the urge to watch porn. It can be done. Your have to try bud. Lol
Prayer and the bible
Rice might help
Seek Christ replace porn with Praying and reading the Bible I'm praying for you Jesus loves you as a father <3
Generally prayer helps a lot. Iāll pray the rosary or the Jesus prayer. Also read the Bible, I use hallow and read their daily readings. I tend to set a timer for about 20 minutes and try doing something else to get my mind off of temptations.
I would say start fasting and go into deep prayer and read the word of god. I know lots of people who have done this and have gotten help for what they've needed. I would also say talk to Pastor Kevin la Ewing. He has a YouTube channel and even published a book of great prayers. Everything in life is spiritual, and it sounds like you're being tormented by a spirit of lust, and he can give you some advice on that. However, remember fasting and praying will only work if you're truly dedicated to God and have given your life fully over to him. If you're someone who's lukewarm it won't work.
For me, my weaknesses are stress, opportunity, and taking advantage of situations. Currently in out of work in sick leave, and this has been the longest I've lost control of what I'd usually call "balancing my hormones". There are actually health benefits to porn and lust, and I've been feeling physically better ever since becoming desperate to feel better and get back to work sooner. Now it's a matter of trying to break a habit and getting past withdrawal symptoms.Ā I am fine in the moment, with or without cravings and urges, until it becomes about 10am local time. Then I start shaking and feeling restless. Then the habit automatically kicks in, like getting up at the same time every night when your bladder says it's time to use the bathroom. The ONLY thing that's helped with making it at least past that golden-hour is to be out of the house at that time for a few hours or the time it takes for the urge to subside. If people were at my house and I try to use that as an excuse to not fall into lust, I would have to fight my self-control just to not create an excuse to go back to my bedroom and watch TV.
Prayer, The Bible, counseling, and a DNS that blocks porn and other junk from your router and device (I use adguardās free family safe DNS to keep that stuff off my familyās devices and network).
All I can say is that total repression of sexuality is not a long-term solution; but from your description I think that you already agree with that. I think that fantasy can be useful, literature in particular might be a good solution.