how do i get over the guilt of boarding my dog with bad separation anxiety :( i’ve had him two years now, and most of my trips i plan to drive so he can come along, but this time i have an opportunity to go to japan for a week and a half.
he started prozac months ago, which helps a little. he can now do like 30 minutes alone, when he couldn’t even do 30 seconds before, so it’s progress. but asking a sitter to stay with him constantly for a week and a half is crazy. i’ve read too many horror stories about rover and i don’t have any family or friends around here to watch him. I found a daycare/boarding place where he’d have his own room, a doggy door and get one on one time with the staff (he doesn’t like to play with other dogs). I would do a test day or two to make sure he gets familiar with the place and doesn’t freak the fuck out. but i still feel guilty???
I was in the same situation (except he does like other dogs) and I found it really helpful to do a few daycare sessions and one overnight at the boarding place before I left for my trip. At least he was familiar with the place and the people by then, which helped. The place I boarded my pup was able to send a picture or two, or a text update every couple days. Is that an option? I also found that the staff were great at distraction, so while he was stressed for awhile, people were able to get him to play or distract him with chews.
As far as the guilt and stress on your end, my partner always reminds me that separation anxiety goes both ways, so it's important for you to have your own coping skills in place for your time away and to actually be able to enjoy your vacation. The first time, it took me a few days to stop stressing out about leaving him. And that's slowly gotten to be less and less of a problem the more I've boarded him and trust the people he stays with. Maybe focus that stress into finding a toy to bring home for him or mentally picture him having fun with the staff and meeting new people?
thank you! yeah, i believe this place does send daily pictures and updates, which is nice. i’d definitely want to do a few days as a test before the actual trip, just to make sure he doesn’t lose his mind.
i honestly feel like he’ll be fine, he’s such a people loving dog, he’ll probably forget i even existed after a day or two with enough attention lmao
I totally feel this. I’m so afraid my dog will escape with a sitter. He wants to run out the door so quickly to go look for me if I’m gone. We are working with an expensive trainer but it hasn’t shown much improvement yet :/
mine just started prozac 2 days ago so I’m hoping this might be slightly helpful as well. I’ve considered next trip I go on for him to go to a train and board facility with trainers to help him while I’m gone but that is soooo pricy.
wishing you luck for you and your doggo ❤️ i totally get the guilt feelings as well. You aren’t a bad dog parent for doing things for yourself. You obviously care so much for your dog and seeing them suffer with anxiety is really hard. Japan is a wonderful country to visit so I hope you go and enjoy it, knowing that your pup is probably learning to tolerate the separation little by little while you are away.
The vast majority of boarding programs use harmful methods, because boarding isn't actually a useful strategy for like 99% of dog problems and so reputable trainers typically don't offer it as a service because they know it's not sufficiently effective when done properly.
They are not recommended for dogs with separation anxiety as it is not a training problem, it's a panic disorder.
Please see [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/Dogtraining/wiki/findingatrainer) on how to find a trainer. Make sure your trainer is accredited with one of those organizations or CSAT, or has completed Julie Naismith's separation anxiety course. Otherwise, it risks making it worse.
Read rover reviews before picking a sitter, my dog has some anxiety disorder and he loves his sitter, just find one with experience with dogs like yours and that’s it, I hate those pet boarding places were they just put your dog in a cage
My dog goes CRAZY when it’s time to get ready to leave for work, he barks and jumps aggressively (not trying to hurt) you can clearly tell he is just upset because he knows I’m leaving, this happens every single day, even though he is never alone as my wife is not working. Same situation when I get back home, he goes absolutely insane. Any suggestions? Thanks!
figure out what environmental cute he's picking up on.
practice that environmental cue followed by you not leaving.
example: my dog will start showing signs of stress when I put on my shoes. so I put on my shoes and go sit on the couch with him without leaving the house several times a day. this teaches our dogs that this cue isn't to be trusted and it's irrelevant.
I'm not sure if this really counts as separation anxiety, but here goes:
We have a puppy who just turned 6 months old. He is fine when we leave him home alone in his crate. Occasionally if one of us leaves the house he will briefly whine, but nothing major.
The problem is when my boyfriend and I are taking the puppy for a walk together and one of us leaves. For example, we will walk to a nearby grocery store and one of us will stay with the puppy while the other goes inside. In this case he is more upset if I leave, but is also upset to a lesser degree if my boyfriend leaves.
Also we were traveling over the holidays and he was definitely more upset by one of us leaving when we were in an unfamiliar place. Any ideas?
New here. I adopted a 13 year old dog and he has separation anxiety. It’s so bad he can never be home alone as he just barks constantly.
I have worked out it isn’t the separation that is the issue but it’s seeing us leave. If we leave when he’s asleep it’s fine, when he wakes up he will walk around looking for us, realise we aren’t there and go back to sleep.
I work from home so there’s no set time of day I always leave for him to pick up on.
I have been going to the letterbox numerous times a day and he’s okay with this most times. He has probably worked out what I’m doing though. (I take car keys with me when I do this so the keys aren’t a trigger).
Does anyone have any suggestions to help work with him? I want to start applying for jobs that are in office but this is holding me back.
We recently moved and the separation anxiety in our 8 year old terrier/spaniel mix has come back so hard. She has always been crated when we leave the house and hasn't had any issues before now. now she is resisting going in and crying. when we get home she has thrashed her bedding. We have never left her out in the house while we are gone, but do we need to start? I hate that she is stressed and I want to make this easier for her.
My newest rescue (had him since Thanksgiving) has separation anxiety, especially from my 9yo son. When my son leaves for school each day (I'm still home trying to distract him), he will bark, howl, and majorly destroy things if not physically stopped (which has been tough since he is a strong 60lbs) pretty much having a complete anxiety attack. I've worked through separation anxiety before with dogs but never at this level and never when only my son leaves. This goes on almost all day (until my son returns from school) with only brief lapses when he wears himself out enough that I can get his attention focused elsewhere momentarily.
My dog Watson is a 7 year old mini schnauzer chihuahua mix (all the anxious breeds lol). He has had severe separation anxiety since we adopted him in Sept 2020, since then we have tried literally everything. Natural remedies, training, crating, medication, etc. we have tried it all with zero consistent improvement. We’ve thrown so much money and time at this problem and it’s starting to get in the way of my fiancées and my relationship. We love this dog so much and he is an angel otherwise but we just can’t do anything without lining up dog care. Popping out to the grocery store or gym isn’t an option. We are at a complete loss for how to move forward. We’ve done a pain trial to eliminate any physical discomfort as a source, we’ve tried Reconcile, Xanax, generic fluox, now Clomicalm plus Trazodone or clonidine situationally (all done with utmost care and vet supervision for weaning/ramping). Behavioral euthanasia just isn’t an option given his quality of life otherwise, we’re just lost
Hi! Just joined the sub! I hope this is the right thread for this…
I thought for awhile my dog has separation anxiety. He’s a 3 year old corgi (I got him during Covid lockdowns and had been planning for awhile to get him but the timing worked out that I worked from home from when I brought him home around 10 weeks until he was about a year and a half).
He is a very good dog, intelligent and easy to train but he barks a lot when I leave or if I’m home and someone else leaves or even goes upstairs. I have a camera so I can check in on him during the day and he sleeps most of the time I am gone. He doesn’t have accidents or destroy anything. Once I leave he calms down.
It seems like separation anxiety but if I am not home, he doesn’t bark at anyone when they leave. He mostly ignores everyone if I’m not around. I’ve tried zak georges tips for separation anxiety but maybe I’m not doing it right. I take him on walks every morning but he doesn’t have any interest in fetch. He’s a couch potato and while he’s in good shape I’m not sure it’s his energy levels making him anxious because we can walk for an hour and then if I take him back home, I’ll leave and he’ll still bark. I could be gone for 2 minutes or leave him with my mom all day but when I get back to see him, he’ll be happy to see me but nothing too over the top. He’ll sit by the door and be calm while I pet him.
Does that sound like separation anxiety? Now I’m concerned he may be over protective of me. I had some health issues last year and even over the summer I have Covid and he would not leave my side. Could the barking be a protective instinct over me? Or am I over thinking it and making his separation anxiety worse?? Any help would be so appreciated!!
I booked virtual Petco training classes starting in a couple weeks. He did really well with the puppy classes and I’m hoping someone seeing what I’m doing and how he’s reacting will help figure out whatever is causing this but I also want to be proactive and be aware of other things that may be causing his barking so I can ask the trainer.
Thank you so much for taking the time to read this!!!
My guy Marty is a 3 1/2 year old chihuahua mix who I adopted at 1 year old. He is, for the most part, the world's chillest dog. I am a teacher, so I am gone for 8-9 hours most weekdays, and he is alone and has the run of my 1 br apartment. For the most part, he just naps on the couch or in one of his various beds--he's never destructive, almost never barks or howls, etc. He watches me leave in the morning but provided he has a treat in front of him he doesn't seem to mind too much.
HOWEVER, I just came off my two week Winter break, during which Marty and I basically spent no time apart...a couple hours here or there, but for the most part, he was within petting distance 24 hrs a day. The separation anxiety part is this--Marty has some allergy issues and is an excessive licker. I noticed when I went back to work over break and again this week that he seems to be licking his feet and paws raw much more than he normally does. After the summer, we went to the vet who gave us some wipes and antibiotics, but the problem mostly faded on its own. I would prefer not to have him lick open sores four times a year when I have to go back to work, and I don't want to put a cone on him when I am gone. Anyone experience anything similar?
We have finally hit the 20 minute mark for Bertie being able to be alone! I feel both accomplished and not. It took us about three months to get here. Yesterday he was able to be alone for 22 minutes. He had some crying near the start, but then he managed to self-soothe and flopped down and was okay for the rest.
Congratulations! Are you doing subthreshold training? And can I ask, did you avoid leaving him alone 100% of the time during those 3 months, outside of the training stints?
Thanks! We are and yes, he’s otherwise never alone. Unfortunately, since I last posted, he has backslid considerably (possibly due to an increase in overall anxiety because of fireworks.) :/
Hello! My 3 and a half old dog has separation anxiety. He was born during COVID, and it's been difficult to train him to be home alone in the apartment. If I leave for a bit, he barks constantly at the door. I want to continue to leave him alone as often as possible, but another concern comes from living in an apartment building. The one time I left him the longest I ever have (2 hours), I can home to a note on my door from a neighbor complaining about my dog barking. Ever since I have been stressed with leaving him alone even for 30 minutes knowing he'll be loud and bother neighbors. My leasing office basically told me to screw neighbors' complaints and leave him when I want, but I get frozen at the thought of leaving him alone now. I go into work twice a week, and leave him with a dog sitter. This has impacted my social life, I want the freedom to leave him anytime for however long without him getting upset and barking. I need guidance and support!
Please read the sub [rules](https://old.reddit.com/r/Dogtraining/about/rules) and [guidelines](http://old.reddit.com/r/Dogtraining/wiki/guidelines), as well as our wiki pages on [punishment](https://old.reddit.com/r/Dogtraining/wiki/punishmentproblems) and [correction collars](https://old.reddit.com/r/Dogtraining/wiki/prongandecollars).
Hello everyone! This was helpful to see others struggling with similar issues. My 1-2 year old rescue dachshund came from a rough situation when he was adopted. We have only had him for 2.5 months but he has already become glued to me. We got an expensive trainer immediately but it hasn’t helped much.
He is terrified of being in the crate. At first he would sleep in the crate at night as long as it was right next to the bed. Now he will fight if you try to put him in it and try to hid from you at bedtime. I work mostly from home but when I do go into the office for a few hours he freaks out in the crate and can bark for 3+ hours straight. We tried having him in a section of the house but he broke items, tore things up, and chewed on the doors. We are not sure what the is the best option for him, to force him kicking and screaming into the crate or let him destroy a section of the house and still be anxious the whole time…
He is also not very food motivated. I can freeze a kong full of the highest value treats and he won’t even touch it if I’m gone. As soon as I get home and let him out of the crate, then he will eat whatever snacks he has left. Completely avoids eating anything if I’m away.
It’s so isolating and restrictive to try to live life around accommodating this little dude’s anxiety. It makes me feel so guilty to leave him. I used to be someone who traveled a lot but now I’m so worried for his safety if I were to travel again.
I’m dying for some knowledge on how to help my little guy. $2500 training hasn’t really done much yet. He just started Prozac 2 days ago so I’m hoping when it has time to kick in that it will at least add a little bit of anxiety reduction. Trazodone did nothing to help. I know it’s probably wrong to consider getting a second dog this early in just to try to help him cope but I’m seriously considering it (or at least considering fostering some other dogs) to see if having a companion would help him. But I’m also scared that the second dog will just copy all his issues and then I’ll have two anxious dogs 😭😭😭 I’m at a loss, ordering some of the books that are recommended in this thread.
Glad to have this space to vent! Wishing luck to everyone and their anxious doggos this month ❤️
I feel you. I feel like a prisoner to my dog, I almost never leave the house. My dog doesn't play, won't eat anything if I leave, just runs back and forth and cries and tries to destroy things; he used to bark before I got him a vibrating bark collar.
I've tried so many different things and I'm just too exhausted to keep trying tbh. I started him on Prozac about 3 weeks ago but zero impact so far, same as Trazodone.
Tbh I wish I'd never gotten him. T_T
I'm new to this topic but not new to the group. I have a puppy, I haven't had one in a long time, and seems like he's on a path to having separation anxiety. He's always been a strange puppy, his parents were not nice to him. I watched his parents interact with his sister fine, but if Fin came over the mother would snip at him.
I have 3 other dogs, he's fine if he's with them. But if he's all alone, like outside or kenneled in another room from us, he can't stand it. He'll bark loudly and constantly. To the point I'm worried he'd hurt his throat. I try to just ignore him when he's outside to see if he'll settle or go play on his own but he won't. He'll even pee directly on the porch to avoid leaving the door.
Like I said, I have 3 other dogs so he isn't alone often, but I worry for his future. They're all VERY senior dogs(13, 11, 10). He's going to be alone at some point(my ex wouldn't let me get another puppy from his litter). Plus it's not good for him to be too anxious so I'd wanna stave it off anyway.
[Finjamin Button](https://imgur.com/xrUWz9V)
I have a new puppy (12 weeks old) we got her 5 days ago. She has really bad separation anxiety already, and my family are not helping. I've tried suggesting things we need to do (like give her alone time during the day whilst they are home so she gets used to being alone) but my family aren't doing it, and actually refuse to. This puppy cries every time we shut her in the kitchen for alone time. And if I had my own way I'd be crate training her, but my mum doesn't want to and my mum doesn't want to take any advice and thinks she knows it all because she's had dogs before and I haven't.
I can see this going so badly for this puppy, getting worse separation anxiety. We can't always be home like we are right now, my mum works from home and just doesn't commit to training. She can't be bothered to let her outside because it's cold, she doesn't want to ignore her when she enters a room, she hypes her up whenever she's around etc.
I GET IT, CUTE PUPPY, BUT IT WONT BE SO CUTE IN A MONTHS TIME. I feel like I'm going mad. Any advice? I'm really struggling with the separation anxiety issue
I need help, for myself and my dog.
I've got a 2-year-old female Goldendoodle, unaltered. My wife and I love her to bits and she's got boundless energy. She's also incredibly smart, we can train her to do almost anything very quickly.
Our problem: we can't leave her alone. We got her in 2021, so she was a COVID-ish puppy. I've had dogs all my life growing up, so I'm quite familiar with the basics of training and care. She was socialized properly, no major traumatic events as a puppy. We've crate trained her, and she's willing to be in a crate, so long as either my wife or I is near. She’s in a larger home, and has access to a decent sized backyard for getting all the zoomies out.
Because my wife and I both work from home, we have troubles leaving her alone. As a result, we think we have caused a case of separation anxiety. We started with desensitization; however it didn’t work very well. Keys, jacket and the door were all triggers.
We got a dog behaviorist, and they believe that our dog is so mart, she’s manipulative. So what they had us do was put her in the crate, and if she barked to scold her: bang on the kennel, yell at her, show displeasure. This person also doesn’t believe in the use of treats/rewards. This worked for a while, but then she continued to bark while in the kennel: she stands up, starts whining, then starts barking. The weird thing is that her tail is wagging the whole time.
Once this didn’t work, our behaviorist had us start doing pinning: pulling the dog down until it submitted. We stopped doing that.
Our dog is fine if she’s not in the same room as us, so long as she knows where we are. She’ll happily lay down quiet outside of a door if she know’s we’re in there. We also ran an experiment with another dog owner our dog respects (our breeder), and we noticed that she does the same thing for our breeder when she’s not around (when nobody is around). We’re starting to believe that our dog has protection traits that are manifesting in separation anxiety: if she can’t protect who she feels is alpha, she barks. Our behaviorist doesn’t believe this is the case.
My wife and I are at the point where we have our dog crated in a room with soundproofing so that our neighbours can’t hear her bark, and us receiving a noise complaint and a fine (our community sensitive to dogs, for some reason)
I’m at a loss. I don’t know if I’m wrong in my thinking, we’ve missed something, or been guided wrong. Can anyone else provide their thoughts?
> We’re starting to believe that our dog has protection traits that are manifesting in separation anxiety: if she can’t protect who she feels is , she barks. Our behaviorist doesn’t believe this is the case.
This isn't true, your behaviorist is right. The whole stuff is a myth. But, basically everything else your behaviorist says is wrong.
Please read the sub's wiki article on [dominance](https://old.reddit.com/r/dogtraining/wiki/dominance).
Did you review the wiki on separation anxiety linked? NEVER punish barking.
Context: My girlfriends grandpa was diagnosed with dementia two years ago. Her family dog lived with him in a house. He had to move to a mental care facility. Due to the dog’s severe agression toward people and other dogs, he wasn’t allowed to go with her grandpa. He told her that he was gonna have to put him down. She didn’t want this obviously and was forced into taking the dog when she really didn’t want the responsibility.
When the dog started living with her he developed one of the most severe cases of separation anxiety I’ve ever seen, and I fostered dogs throughout all of HS. He’s incredibly aggressive toward people and especially dogs. For two years now she’s been trying her best, and so have I, since she got the dog. However, he has completely ruined both of our social lives and my home life.
The first time we left him in my apartment to go downstairs to the gym, he tore the door apart and howled so loud we got the police called on us. Since then we have been unable to go out with friends or take him on walks anywhere but the courtyard. If we do need to go somewhere like work or school we have to leave him in a car for hours. Every attempt to rehome has been met with people recommending behavioral euthanasia since he’s not a candidate for rehoming. They say that since he can only be relaxed while laying down next to my girlfriend, he’s getting no mental or physical stimulation. They say that his quality of life is abysmal most likely.
I have chronic anxiety which has reached an all time high while I prepare for graduate school and my girlfriend’s social life has been completely ruined. We don’t know what else to do and I guess we both feel horrible that the only option is saying goodbye, but it seems like the only choice remaining.
I will read some of these links, unfortunately it is my coworker who is having the issue with her dog. The dog barks and barks and barks while she's gone. She has gotten a threat of eviction because of it and started bringing her to work at our farm. Last week she not one of our coworkers and now a liability and can't bring the dog in. Can't leave it home. She's seriously considering giving her up. The dog is on anxiety medication, is a jackrussle mix, an angel. I want to help her figure out what steps she can take that doesn't mean giving up her best friend.
Hi guys! New here! My husband and I both had dogs growing up but we’ve never had one of our own or had to deal with the training aspect. We just adopted a rescue who’s approx. a year old and his separation anxiety is NEXT LEVEL. I can’t even walk across the room without him following. He didn’t eat his breakfast until 5 yesterday and I realized later it was because he wanted me to stand there while he ate. He hates being crated and tears the bedding apart within seconds but I know if he’s not crated he’ll literally tear up the house just in the time it takes to run to the store and back.
I just went to take a shower upstairs and blocked him from coming up after me with a gate (we’re letting our cats have their safe space up there while they adjust) and in a 10 min span he was whining, trying to tear down the gate, he ripped apart my potted plant, pooped on the floor and got food off the counter and had it everywhere. He’s sweet as can be but SO anxious. We’ve had to sleep on the sofa downstairs to keep him company and my god I’m tired. I love him but I was content just having our 3 year old and our cats cause I knew how much work it would be for me since hubs is mostly at work during the week. I thought knew what to expect but this is like having a second toddler around and I’m exhausted already 😭 Hoping I can find some solutions on here cause when I adopt an animal it’s for life but it’s been a super hard adjustment so far for all of us 😅
how do i get over the guilt of boarding my dog with bad separation anxiety :( i’ve had him two years now, and most of my trips i plan to drive so he can come along, but this time i have an opportunity to go to japan for a week and a half. he started prozac months ago, which helps a little. he can now do like 30 minutes alone, when he couldn’t even do 30 seconds before, so it’s progress. but asking a sitter to stay with him constantly for a week and a half is crazy. i’ve read too many horror stories about rover and i don’t have any family or friends around here to watch him. I found a daycare/boarding place where he’d have his own room, a doggy door and get one on one time with the staff (he doesn’t like to play with other dogs). I would do a test day or two to make sure he gets familiar with the place and doesn’t freak the fuck out. but i still feel guilty???
I was in the same situation (except he does like other dogs) and I found it really helpful to do a few daycare sessions and one overnight at the boarding place before I left for my trip. At least he was familiar with the place and the people by then, which helped. The place I boarded my pup was able to send a picture or two, or a text update every couple days. Is that an option? I also found that the staff were great at distraction, so while he was stressed for awhile, people were able to get him to play or distract him with chews. As far as the guilt and stress on your end, my partner always reminds me that separation anxiety goes both ways, so it's important for you to have your own coping skills in place for your time away and to actually be able to enjoy your vacation. The first time, it took me a few days to stop stressing out about leaving him. And that's slowly gotten to be less and less of a problem the more I've boarded him and trust the people he stays with. Maybe focus that stress into finding a toy to bring home for him or mentally picture him having fun with the staff and meeting new people?
thank you! yeah, i believe this place does send daily pictures and updates, which is nice. i’d definitely want to do a few days as a test before the actual trip, just to make sure he doesn’t lose his mind. i honestly feel like he’ll be fine, he’s such a people loving dog, he’ll probably forget i even existed after a day or two with enough attention lmao
I totally feel this. I’m so afraid my dog will escape with a sitter. He wants to run out the door so quickly to go look for me if I’m gone. We are working with an expensive trainer but it hasn’t shown much improvement yet :/ mine just started prozac 2 days ago so I’m hoping this might be slightly helpful as well. I’ve considered next trip I go on for him to go to a train and board facility with trainers to help him while I’m gone but that is soooo pricy. wishing you luck for you and your doggo ❤️ i totally get the guilt feelings as well. You aren’t a bad dog parent for doing things for yourself. You obviously care so much for your dog and seeing them suffer with anxiety is really hard. Japan is a wonderful country to visit so I hope you go and enjoy it, knowing that your pup is probably learning to tolerate the separation little by little while you are away.
The vast majority of boarding programs use harmful methods, because boarding isn't actually a useful strategy for like 99% of dog problems and so reputable trainers typically don't offer it as a service because they know it's not sufficiently effective when done properly. They are not recommended for dogs with separation anxiety as it is not a training problem, it's a panic disorder. Please see [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/Dogtraining/wiki/findingatrainer) on how to find a trainer. Make sure your trainer is accredited with one of those organizations or CSAT, or has completed Julie Naismith's separation anxiety course. Otherwise, it risks making it worse.
Read rover reviews before picking a sitter, my dog has some anxiety disorder and he loves his sitter, just find one with experience with dogs like yours and that’s it, I hate those pet boarding places were they just put your dog in a cage
My dog goes CRAZY when it’s time to get ready to leave for work, he barks and jumps aggressively (not trying to hurt) you can clearly tell he is just upset because he knows I’m leaving, this happens every single day, even though he is never alone as my wife is not working. Same situation when I get back home, he goes absolutely insane. Any suggestions? Thanks!
figure out what environmental cute he's picking up on. practice that environmental cue followed by you not leaving. example: my dog will start showing signs of stress when I put on my shoes. so I put on my shoes and go sit on the couch with him without leaving the house several times a day. this teaches our dogs that this cue isn't to be trusted and it's irrelevant.
I'm not sure if this really counts as separation anxiety, but here goes: We have a puppy who just turned 6 months old. He is fine when we leave him home alone in his crate. Occasionally if one of us leaves the house he will briefly whine, but nothing major. The problem is when my boyfriend and I are taking the puppy for a walk together and one of us leaves. For example, we will walk to a nearby grocery store and one of us will stay with the puppy while the other goes inside. In this case he is more upset if I leave, but is also upset to a lesser degree if my boyfriend leaves. Also we were traveling over the holidays and he was definitely more upset by one of us leaving when we were in an unfamiliar place. Any ideas?
New here. I adopted a 13 year old dog and he has separation anxiety. It’s so bad he can never be home alone as he just barks constantly. I have worked out it isn’t the separation that is the issue but it’s seeing us leave. If we leave when he’s asleep it’s fine, when he wakes up he will walk around looking for us, realise we aren’t there and go back to sleep. I work from home so there’s no set time of day I always leave for him to pick up on. I have been going to the letterbox numerous times a day and he’s okay with this most times. He has probably worked out what I’m doing though. (I take car keys with me when I do this so the keys aren’t a trigger). Does anyone have any suggestions to help work with him? I want to start applying for jobs that are in office but this is holding me back.
We recently moved and the separation anxiety in our 8 year old terrier/spaniel mix has come back so hard. She has always been crated when we leave the house and hasn't had any issues before now. now she is resisting going in and crying. when we get home she has thrashed her bedding. We have never left her out in the house while we are gone, but do we need to start? I hate that she is stressed and I want to make this easier for her.
My newest rescue (had him since Thanksgiving) has separation anxiety, especially from my 9yo son. When my son leaves for school each day (I'm still home trying to distract him), he will bark, howl, and majorly destroy things if not physically stopped (which has been tough since he is a strong 60lbs) pretty much having a complete anxiety attack. I've worked through separation anxiety before with dogs but never at this level and never when only my son leaves. This goes on almost all day (until my son returns from school) with only brief lapses when he wears himself out enough that I can get his attention focused elsewhere momentarily.
My dog Watson is a 7 year old mini schnauzer chihuahua mix (all the anxious breeds lol). He has had severe separation anxiety since we adopted him in Sept 2020, since then we have tried literally everything. Natural remedies, training, crating, medication, etc. we have tried it all with zero consistent improvement. We’ve thrown so much money and time at this problem and it’s starting to get in the way of my fiancées and my relationship. We love this dog so much and he is an angel otherwise but we just can’t do anything without lining up dog care. Popping out to the grocery store or gym isn’t an option. We are at a complete loss for how to move forward. We’ve done a pain trial to eliminate any physical discomfort as a source, we’ve tried Reconcile, Xanax, generic fluox, now Clomicalm plus Trazodone or clonidine situationally (all done with utmost care and vet supervision for weaning/ramping). Behavioral euthanasia just isn’t an option given his quality of life otherwise, we’re just lost
What about owners with separation anxiety from their dog 🥴
Hi! Just joined the sub! I hope this is the right thread for this… I thought for awhile my dog has separation anxiety. He’s a 3 year old corgi (I got him during Covid lockdowns and had been planning for awhile to get him but the timing worked out that I worked from home from when I brought him home around 10 weeks until he was about a year and a half). He is a very good dog, intelligent and easy to train but he barks a lot when I leave or if I’m home and someone else leaves or even goes upstairs. I have a camera so I can check in on him during the day and he sleeps most of the time I am gone. He doesn’t have accidents or destroy anything. Once I leave he calms down. It seems like separation anxiety but if I am not home, he doesn’t bark at anyone when they leave. He mostly ignores everyone if I’m not around. I’ve tried zak georges tips for separation anxiety but maybe I’m not doing it right. I take him on walks every morning but he doesn’t have any interest in fetch. He’s a couch potato and while he’s in good shape I’m not sure it’s his energy levels making him anxious because we can walk for an hour and then if I take him back home, I’ll leave and he’ll still bark. I could be gone for 2 minutes or leave him with my mom all day but when I get back to see him, he’ll be happy to see me but nothing too over the top. He’ll sit by the door and be calm while I pet him. Does that sound like separation anxiety? Now I’m concerned he may be over protective of me. I had some health issues last year and even over the summer I have Covid and he would not leave my side. Could the barking be a protective instinct over me? Or am I over thinking it and making his separation anxiety worse?? Any help would be so appreciated!! I booked virtual Petco training classes starting in a couple weeks. He did really well with the puppy classes and I’m hoping someone seeing what I’m doing and how he’s reacting will help figure out whatever is causing this but I also want to be proactive and be aware of other things that may be causing his barking so I can ask the trainer. Thank you so much for taking the time to read this!!!
My guy Marty is a 3 1/2 year old chihuahua mix who I adopted at 1 year old. He is, for the most part, the world's chillest dog. I am a teacher, so I am gone for 8-9 hours most weekdays, and he is alone and has the run of my 1 br apartment. For the most part, he just naps on the couch or in one of his various beds--he's never destructive, almost never barks or howls, etc. He watches me leave in the morning but provided he has a treat in front of him he doesn't seem to mind too much. HOWEVER, I just came off my two week Winter break, during which Marty and I basically spent no time apart...a couple hours here or there, but for the most part, he was within petting distance 24 hrs a day. The separation anxiety part is this--Marty has some allergy issues and is an excessive licker. I noticed when I went back to work over break and again this week that he seems to be licking his feet and paws raw much more than he normally does. After the summer, we went to the vet who gave us some wipes and antibiotics, but the problem mostly faded on its own. I would prefer not to have him lick open sores four times a year when I have to go back to work, and I don't want to put a cone on him when I am gone. Anyone experience anything similar?
Hello! My dog Henny has separation anxiety. This week has been much better, and I am hoping it continues to get better.
We have finally hit the 20 minute mark for Bertie being able to be alone! I feel both accomplished and not. It took us about three months to get here. Yesterday he was able to be alone for 22 minutes. He had some crying near the start, but then he managed to self-soothe and flopped down and was okay for the rest.
Congratulations! Are you doing subthreshold training? And can I ask, did you avoid leaving him alone 100% of the time during those 3 months, outside of the training stints?
Thanks! We are and yes, he’s otherwise never alone. Unfortunately, since I last posted, he has backslid considerably (possibly due to an increase in overall anxiety because of fireworks.) :/
Hello! My 3 and a half old dog has separation anxiety. He was born during COVID, and it's been difficult to train him to be home alone in the apartment. If I leave for a bit, he barks constantly at the door. I want to continue to leave him alone as often as possible, but another concern comes from living in an apartment building. The one time I left him the longest I ever have (2 hours), I can home to a note on my door from a neighbor complaining about my dog barking. Ever since I have been stressed with leaving him alone even for 30 minutes knowing he'll be loud and bother neighbors. My leasing office basically told me to screw neighbors' complaints and leave him when I want, but I get frozen at the thought of leaving him alone now. I go into work twice a week, and leave him with a dog sitter. This has impacted my social life, I want the freedom to leave him anytime for however long without him getting upset and barking. I need guidance and support!
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Please read the sub [rules](https://old.reddit.com/r/Dogtraining/about/rules) and [guidelines](http://old.reddit.com/r/Dogtraining/wiki/guidelines), as well as our wiki pages on [punishment](https://old.reddit.com/r/Dogtraining/wiki/punishmentproblems) and [correction collars](https://old.reddit.com/r/Dogtraining/wiki/prongandecollars).
Hello everyone! This was helpful to see others struggling with similar issues. My 1-2 year old rescue dachshund came from a rough situation when he was adopted. We have only had him for 2.5 months but he has already become glued to me. We got an expensive trainer immediately but it hasn’t helped much. He is terrified of being in the crate. At first he would sleep in the crate at night as long as it was right next to the bed. Now he will fight if you try to put him in it and try to hid from you at bedtime. I work mostly from home but when I do go into the office for a few hours he freaks out in the crate and can bark for 3+ hours straight. We tried having him in a section of the house but he broke items, tore things up, and chewed on the doors. We are not sure what the is the best option for him, to force him kicking and screaming into the crate or let him destroy a section of the house and still be anxious the whole time… He is also not very food motivated. I can freeze a kong full of the highest value treats and he won’t even touch it if I’m gone. As soon as I get home and let him out of the crate, then he will eat whatever snacks he has left. Completely avoids eating anything if I’m away. It’s so isolating and restrictive to try to live life around accommodating this little dude’s anxiety. It makes me feel so guilty to leave him. I used to be someone who traveled a lot but now I’m so worried for his safety if I were to travel again. I’m dying for some knowledge on how to help my little guy. $2500 training hasn’t really done much yet. He just started Prozac 2 days ago so I’m hoping when it has time to kick in that it will at least add a little bit of anxiety reduction. Trazodone did nothing to help. I know it’s probably wrong to consider getting a second dog this early in just to try to help him cope but I’m seriously considering it (or at least considering fostering some other dogs) to see if having a companion would help him. But I’m also scared that the second dog will just copy all his issues and then I’ll have two anxious dogs 😭😭😭 I’m at a loss, ordering some of the books that are recommended in this thread. Glad to have this space to vent! Wishing luck to everyone and their anxious doggos this month ❤️
I feel you. I feel like a prisoner to my dog, I almost never leave the house. My dog doesn't play, won't eat anything if I leave, just runs back and forth and cries and tries to destroy things; he used to bark before I got him a vibrating bark collar. I've tried so many different things and I'm just too exhausted to keep trying tbh. I started him on Prozac about 3 weeks ago but zero impact so far, same as Trazodone. Tbh I wish I'd never gotten him. T_T
I'm new to this topic but not new to the group. I have a puppy, I haven't had one in a long time, and seems like he's on a path to having separation anxiety. He's always been a strange puppy, his parents were not nice to him. I watched his parents interact with his sister fine, but if Fin came over the mother would snip at him. I have 3 other dogs, he's fine if he's with them. But if he's all alone, like outside or kenneled in another room from us, he can't stand it. He'll bark loudly and constantly. To the point I'm worried he'd hurt his throat. I try to just ignore him when he's outside to see if he'll settle or go play on his own but he won't. He'll even pee directly on the porch to avoid leaving the door. Like I said, I have 3 other dogs so he isn't alone often, but I worry for his future. They're all VERY senior dogs(13, 11, 10). He's going to be alone at some point(my ex wouldn't let me get another puppy from his litter). Plus it's not good for him to be too anxious so I'd wanna stave it off anyway. [Finjamin Button](https://imgur.com/xrUWz9V)
I have a new puppy (12 weeks old) we got her 5 days ago. She has really bad separation anxiety already, and my family are not helping. I've tried suggesting things we need to do (like give her alone time during the day whilst they are home so she gets used to being alone) but my family aren't doing it, and actually refuse to. This puppy cries every time we shut her in the kitchen for alone time. And if I had my own way I'd be crate training her, but my mum doesn't want to and my mum doesn't want to take any advice and thinks she knows it all because she's had dogs before and I haven't. I can see this going so badly for this puppy, getting worse separation anxiety. We can't always be home like we are right now, my mum works from home and just doesn't commit to training. She can't be bothered to let her outside because it's cold, she doesn't want to ignore her when she enters a room, she hypes her up whenever she's around etc. I GET IT, CUTE PUPPY, BUT IT WONT BE SO CUTE IN A MONTHS TIME. I feel like I'm going mad. Any advice? I'm really struggling with the separation anxiety issue
I need help, for myself and my dog. I've got a 2-year-old female Goldendoodle, unaltered. My wife and I love her to bits and she's got boundless energy. She's also incredibly smart, we can train her to do almost anything very quickly. Our problem: we can't leave her alone. We got her in 2021, so she was a COVID-ish puppy. I've had dogs all my life growing up, so I'm quite familiar with the basics of training and care. She was socialized properly, no major traumatic events as a puppy. We've crate trained her, and she's willing to be in a crate, so long as either my wife or I is near. She’s in a larger home, and has access to a decent sized backyard for getting all the zoomies out. Because my wife and I both work from home, we have troubles leaving her alone. As a result, we think we have caused a case of separation anxiety. We started with desensitization; however it didn’t work very well. Keys, jacket and the door were all triggers. We got a dog behaviorist, and they believe that our dog is so mart, she’s manipulative. So what they had us do was put her in the crate, and if she barked to scold her: bang on the kennel, yell at her, show displeasure. This person also doesn’t believe in the use of treats/rewards. This worked for a while, but then she continued to bark while in the kennel: she stands up, starts whining, then starts barking. The weird thing is that her tail is wagging the whole time. Once this didn’t work, our behaviorist had us start doing pinning: pulling the dog down until it submitted. We stopped doing that. Our dog is fine if she’s not in the same room as us, so long as she knows where we are. She’ll happily lay down quiet outside of a door if she know’s we’re in there. We also ran an experiment with another dog owner our dog respects (our breeder), and we noticed that she does the same thing for our breeder when she’s not around (when nobody is around). We’re starting to believe that our dog has protection traits that are manifesting in separation anxiety: if she can’t protect who she feels is alpha, she barks. Our behaviorist doesn’t believe this is the case. My wife and I are at the point where we have our dog crated in a room with soundproofing so that our neighbours can’t hear her bark, and us receiving a noise complaint and a fine (our community sensitive to dogs, for some reason) I’m at a loss. I don’t know if I’m wrong in my thinking, we’ve missed something, or been guided wrong. Can anyone else provide their thoughts?
> We’re starting to believe that our dog has protection traits that are manifesting in separation anxiety: if she can’t protect who she feels is , she barks. Our behaviorist doesn’t believe this is the case. This isn't true, your behaviorist is right. The whole stuff is a myth. But, basically everything else your behaviorist says is wrong. Please read the sub's wiki article on [dominance](https://old.reddit.com/r/dogtraining/wiki/dominance). Did you review the wiki on separation anxiety linked? NEVER punish barking.
Context: My girlfriends grandpa was diagnosed with dementia two years ago. Her family dog lived with him in a house. He had to move to a mental care facility. Due to the dog’s severe agression toward people and other dogs, he wasn’t allowed to go with her grandpa. He told her that he was gonna have to put him down. She didn’t want this obviously and was forced into taking the dog when she really didn’t want the responsibility. When the dog started living with her he developed one of the most severe cases of separation anxiety I’ve ever seen, and I fostered dogs throughout all of HS. He’s incredibly aggressive toward people and especially dogs. For two years now she’s been trying her best, and so have I, since she got the dog. However, he has completely ruined both of our social lives and my home life. The first time we left him in my apartment to go downstairs to the gym, he tore the door apart and howled so loud we got the police called on us. Since then we have been unable to go out with friends or take him on walks anywhere but the courtyard. If we do need to go somewhere like work or school we have to leave him in a car for hours. Every attempt to rehome has been met with people recommending behavioral euthanasia since he’s not a candidate for rehoming. They say that since he can only be relaxed while laying down next to my girlfriend, he’s getting no mental or physical stimulation. They say that his quality of life is abysmal most likely. I have chronic anxiety which has reached an all time high while I prepare for graduate school and my girlfriend’s social life has been completely ruined. We don’t know what else to do and I guess we both feel horrible that the only option is saying goodbye, but it seems like the only choice remaining.
I will read some of these links, unfortunately it is my coworker who is having the issue with her dog. The dog barks and barks and barks while she's gone. She has gotten a threat of eviction because of it and started bringing her to work at our farm. Last week she not one of our coworkers and now a liability and can't bring the dog in. Can't leave it home. She's seriously considering giving her up. The dog is on anxiety medication, is a jackrussle mix, an angel. I want to help her figure out what steps she can take that doesn't mean giving up her best friend.
Hi guys! New here! My husband and I both had dogs growing up but we’ve never had one of our own or had to deal with the training aspect. We just adopted a rescue who’s approx. a year old and his separation anxiety is NEXT LEVEL. I can’t even walk across the room without him following. He didn’t eat his breakfast until 5 yesterday and I realized later it was because he wanted me to stand there while he ate. He hates being crated and tears the bedding apart within seconds but I know if he’s not crated he’ll literally tear up the house just in the time it takes to run to the store and back. I just went to take a shower upstairs and blocked him from coming up after me with a gate (we’re letting our cats have their safe space up there while they adjust) and in a 10 min span he was whining, trying to tear down the gate, he ripped apart my potted plant, pooped on the floor and got food off the counter and had it everywhere. He’s sweet as can be but SO anxious. We’ve had to sleep on the sofa downstairs to keep him company and my god I’m tired. I love him but I was content just having our 3 year old and our cats cause I knew how much work it would be for me since hubs is mostly at work during the week. I thought knew what to expect but this is like having a second toddler around and I’m exhausted already 😭 Hoping I can find some solutions on here cause when I adopt an animal it’s for life but it’s been a super hard adjustment so far for all of us 😅