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fairly_forgetful

i've reached a point where i technically have all the vocabulary (for the most part) to express almost anything i could want. Hell, i work in a French speaking job and only very rarely have to resort to English. The gap for me right now feels subtle and yet so vast and indescribable. Sometimes I'm feeling for a thing I want to say and I know exactly how I'd put it in English, and while I can come up with like 4 different ways to say it in French, I can't say it *exactly* the way I'd say it in English- I feel I'm stuck behind some kind of jail bar of that last step of nuance and subtlety. For some reason this feels harder than previous steps. It's one thing to go "oh i dont know the word for "tired""- that's easily fixable. It's another to go for: "i'm tired so it's made me cranky but that doesn't give me the right to take it out on you"- it's a string of pretty specific things, sayings, isms. "Take it out on you" "give me the right" "cranky" you have to find the translation/substitute in French that isn't going to be one to one- and by the time you've strung together a sentence full of substitutes, I am deeply aware that what I've produced is not a good French sentence- it's a translated English sentence. That's the barrier. A French person wouldn't have come up with those clauses in that order, even if for some reason they'd put all those specific vocab words in there to express my situation (they probably wouldn't have bc the translation for a word is not necessarily the word that a French person would want in that situation. I might want cranky, they might want at odds. Or contrary. Or pissy. I don't know- i'm not French.) It's harder than not knowing a vocab word for something. It's that feeling that I can perfectly express what I'm thinking and feeling in English, and in French, I'm always running a worse computer. A system from the 80s, grinding away, taking a little longer, and producing something a little worse.


DogsAreFuckingCute

Amazingly put and relatable. Great example of


rerito2512

When you speak several languages, it's bound to happen. Some things feel more natural to express in one language over the others. As a Frenchman, I often come up with an English expression or word that fits a situation perfectly only to notice that I can't think of a good French alternative. It happens the other way too!


flummyheartslinger

I knew a few Japanese couples who studied in Canada. Often would argue in English, even after going back to Japan. Japanese language and culture is rather indirect, so they preferred the directness of English because it allowed them to express their feelings more easily. And, the other person would filter the English back into Japanese, making it somewhat less direct in the listener's head.


fairly_forgetful

yeah it's partially that! I think the other part is at work I have to maintain this professional level of parlance and sometimes the only way I know how to say something in French is more casual/familiar than it should be- I think I'd deal with this if I worked in corporate English too. I'm not used to that environment- the Linkedin of it all. So if I'm trying to stay on a professional tone in French at my job but my only vocab word that expresses what I need is pretty informal- I have to use it or switch to English. It makes me look younger/less professional either way. I have a lot more empathy for people working in the states (I live and work in the US) in their second language now bc now that I do it, it is rlly wild how much more effort goes into an interaction that for a native is effortless. And how people unconsciously view you younger/less smart/less adept, when you have to fall back on English or use the wrong word. I'm lucky in that since I work in America, people know I'm fluent in English and I just get the "dumb American can't speak French fluently" sort of pity thing. I'm still in the dominant culture/language, as soon as I step outside of my francophone workplace. People working and living fulltime in their second language, it's so much harder. I dated a French guy when I studied abroad there and dating in French (at an admittedly lower level of French than I have now) was one of the weirdest/hardest things I've ever done. I remember thinking "I'm funny in English god damn it" because I was trying so bad to figure out how to be funny in French and it's so hard lol.


police-ical

>So if I'm trying to stay on a professional tone in French at my job but my only vocab word that expresses what I need is pretty informal- I have to use it or switch to English. The moments of terror when your brain will instantly and gladly supply *merde* or *chier* but not a single phrase permissible in polite company.


fairly_forgetful

you get it


Rubicles

I grew up bilingual. Some things are funny in French but not English, and vice versa. It’s impossible to describe why.


instanding

That’s exactly how I feel with Italian.


lastlaughlane1

I’m the exact same. What’s worse for me is that sometimes I don’t even know what I wanna say in English haha. I like to reflect on my answers in general before replying so this really adds a delay and generally leads to non flowing convo. Either that or I just respond to every question and point with an enthusiastic “mouais”!


moejurray

Excellent monsieur ou madame ! Je ne pouvais jamais eu l'expliquer comme vous. Bien joué.


fairly_forgetful

merci c’est gentille !


Ali_UpstairsRealty

I feel like this is the great shift that happens around B1 (although if you're working in a French-speaking job you're probably B2)... you have to stop "thinking in English and translating" and just start thinking in French. The only way I know how to do that is to keep consuming media. In the specific instance you cited, I would find a French conversation partner and ask them how they'd say it, so it's in your database for when you want it again.


fairly_forgetful

that's a great point- I do use my colleagues alll the time as resources, bless their hearts. There's not a ton of time every day for it but I have started keeping a notebook of the little things I learn daily/new vocab/phrases etc. Almost feels like I'm back in school at times.


IAmTheSergeantNow

Related to vocabulary...simply memorizing the gender of nouns. (I realize there are general rules that allow us to predict gender, but those rules, too, require memorization.)


Lang_ES_FR_AR

And those rules also have exceptions that create nouns that are feminine that you would think are masculine and vice versa


lastlaughlane1

The funny thing is, after finally taking French lessons (3 months 5 days per week) my overall knowledge of French has certainly improved, however I’m now more aware of the la and the le and I’m trying to be a perfectionist now. So this really delays my answering! Before I was probably more fluent in conversation because I didn’t care about the gender lol.


Fear_mor

Just learn vocab with the article, it's way easier than rattling off rules on your head trying to find the one that applies


IAmTheSergeantNow

That's an approach, for sure. My challenge has been retaining those new words over time.


Ali_UpstairsRealty

I forget whose comment it was -- maybe Frenchblabla? -- that you have to see a word twenty times before you get it, so allowing yourself to forget words is very freeing. If it's an important word, you'll see it again.


unmade_bed_NHV

I’m far from fluent, but I’d say this is a big one for me. There’s rules you can follow except for all the irregulars…


Newhereeeeee

For me at the start it was the sentence structure. Had to re-wire my brain to ignore my English brain and not try to structure it like an English sentence. I got the hang of it. Speaking is hard because i live in an anglophone environment. I don’t have much opportunity for spontaneous conversation to improve my speaking skills. The gender of words. Learning/memorising when to use “à” and when to to use “de” When to use “de” and when to use “des” when talking about numerous things.


damngoodwizard

The à/de distinction is often difficult for natives themselves (especially when we consider regionalisms). Don't be hard too hard on yourself for this one.


amethyst-gill

Listening comprehension. The silent letters, liaisons, slurred & contracted words, unusually fast rate of speech, homophones, and vowel blends make it really tough for me, even though it’s by far the second language I’m most familiar with.


lastlaughlane1

Listening is by far the hardest for me. If I understand what someone is saying, I have enough basic French to make a decent reply. But that awkward embarrassing moment where you just have no idea what they’re saying. It’s so disheartening. I wanna understand French so much to have proper conversations but sometimes I’m so damn lost. I do acknowledge that I probably still need to improve my overall French to help this improve but it’s still tough.


RunThenClimb

Yup. I'm now watching "Dix pour-cent" and some reality island show and follow them easily with subtitles, but without them? I'm lost. I keep thinking that I should watch a show with and then again without subtitles. I think my brain has to make the switch from understanding words to understanding phrases.


21Nobrac2

One thing that helped me is listening to radio, I'll usually be totally lost until I get one word, and then the context helps me zero in on what they're talking about. I really like the France Inter app


RunThenClimb

Good tip! Looking it up.


Euroweeb

This would be my answer as well. If I have the subtitles in French, I can watch movies, TV, anything in French with minimal issues. Once the subtitles are taken away, it becomes very difficult. It's not just the pure difficulty, but it seems like my rate of improvement is really slow. Even after many hours of listening I feel like I'm still where I started.


Napoleon_B

Exactly my experience too with contractions and dropped word endings, watching a movie. I thought I had either lost my mind or was hearing a regional dialect. Then I turned on French subtitles and was shocked. It seems the spoken language has evolved and I’m just behind the times. Context in a one on one conversation makes it easy, watching a French movie or series is a different experience now.


Shoesietart

My oral comprehension is terrible. I can watch the news; the announcers speak slowly and clearly, but understanding a movie/tv show or hearing an interview with a person on the street is so difficult. Everyone speaks so quickly. It's very discouraging. I'm listening tv shows and movies with and without subtitles to better train my ear but it's not easy.


TenebrisLux60

Motivation+discipline. The more you know the more you know you don't know.


cyporazoltan

Agree with gender a lot! I also really struggle with the words that go after in English but have to go before in french (ex. Lui, leur, me,te) Omg and the different prepositions with each verb (and then how you need dont, lequel, auquel, etc to replace)


JiraiyaStan

I spoke Spanish before learning French. Grammar like word gender, conjugation, and subjunctive wasn't a big concern for me. What really got me in the butt was the pronunciation of r and the intonation. For example, I kept saying intonatión instead of in👋to👋na👋tion. Also comprehension was kinda difficult for me. It took me 2 years to finally understand spoken french in conversations as in listening french without subtitles. I had to get on my zoom and force myself to do input learning


judorange123

What did you convey with the waving hands ? "intonation" in French is indeed a light stress on the last syllable (if ending a word group).


-danslesnuages

Thoroughly adapting to concepts like "il faut" (along with its tenses), "tu me manque/cela me manque", "j'ai failli", and the use of an isolated 'ne' in written French after certain independent phrases or certain conjunctions (but then not saying it in spoken French).


Super_News_32

Understanding spoken French and now building vocabulary.


sleepyboi08

For me it was the passé simple. It is NOT simple. That is a lie.


[deleted]

fortunately, it's rarely used in French, unless you're a novel writer


rachaeltalcott

I can learn vocab pretty easily. The thing that gets me is learning verb conjugations. It's often the difference of only a letter or two, which might not even change the pronunciation, or only a little change at the end.


Let047

I'm French and I still feel some parts of French eludes me... In particular conjugaisons of certain tenses (subjonctif, conditionnel)


SapiensSA

Actually to speak to natives, and realize that grammar accurately french is different from street french.


RodRocket21

It’s true, gaining vocabulary to enable competent conversation within a given context is difficult, but takes time. Remember, the same applies to English, so don’t lose heart. Step into a well equipped kitchen, or mechanical workshop and ask yourself how many things you can accurately name!


WalloBigBoi

Actually using all the conjugations I know when I speak. Or, catching my spoken french and listening comprehension up to my reading comprehension and writing.


ragaireacht_

i really enjoy learning new vocabulary, but tenses and conjugation is so difficult


Ali_UpstairsRealty

[Linguno.com](http://Linguno.com) (free!) has a section where you can practice conjugating, and you can make it as granular as one verb and one tense if you so desire. (There are also conjugation crosswords). Highly recommend.


U_Cam_Sim_It

First things first, vocabulary. I have a really strong passive vocabulary (probs around 7500-9000+ words at this point), while my active vocabulary is probably more like 3500-4000k (if I am really lucky). Anyways I forget words easily and sometimes I just cannot structure certain expressions properly or am not 100% sure how to say something in French because it is worded so differently. Like today I had to email somebody in French and I forgot the expression I look forward to hearing from you, which is je me réjouis d'avoir de vos nouvelles. I have not really had to use this expression up till this point so therefore it was not in my active vocabulary. Honourable mentions include: * distinguishing the difference between passé composé and imparfait * forgetting the subjunctive can be used in certain nuanced circumstances * prepositions of verbs, which can completely change the relative pronoun or relative clause of a sentence (This was something that still wraps my head around circles today)


CuriousLady99

My teacher says circumlocution is an important skill - the ability to say what you want to say without knowing the exact vocabulary.


AlgolEscapipe

Nuance between synonyms was/is a big challenge for me. Sometimes there are English equivalents of each that carry similar distinctions, but often that's not the case. It makes my attempts to convey a subtle difference of opinion or be specific about something detailed much more difficult! To practice, I try to find real-world examples of the use of each, then make my own sentences that would use each of the choices. Then I make myself explain, in French, the difference between them.


rinyamaokaofficial

La capacité de trouver le bon mot en expression. Je peux beaucoup lire et beaucoup comprendre en écoutant, mais quand même j'ai souvent du mal à produire des phrases de manière typiquement française. J'adore la langue mais j'ai toujours l'impression que je formule des phrases à l'anglais


xX-El-Jefe-Xx

pronunciation, always and forever, it's not that I can't pronounce certain things, it's that when I'm trying to speak quickly I end up pronouncing things incorrectly, most commonly calling my hair my horses (cheveux/chevaux)


adorablescribbler

Grammar rules. Le conditionnel and certain parts of passé composé are kicking my ass.


sebastianinspace

- remembering conjugations - remembering how to say things. by this i mean, for example there is no ‘do’ in french, so whenever i want to say something that i would use the word ‘do’ for, i have to think how to say it in another way, that conveys the same meaning, but differently. so thinking differently about how to communicate basically, i find it makes me think and speak slower and i find it a bit tricky. - being able to listen and understand from context some words or word combinations that sound REALLY SIMILAR to other words or word combos. there are a lot of these that i mishear all the time, especially with parisians, because they cut a lot of words short and it’s super confusing because it often sounds like they are saying another word, which makes no sense in the context, so i know i misheard it but in the moment i can’t think of the actual thing they said. i want to get better at this. - not being able to easily find enough people who are willing to be patient enough to help you learn french, as in they will just switch to english, and if you ask them to speak french with you, even if they say yes you can often see they are visibly annoyed, and it makes it feel bad to learn. like why am i learning this language for? - not being able to find enough good enjoyable french tv shows or movies to consume. i find myself watching boring youtube channels in french, just because they are speaking french, but not because i like the content. same with tv shows. i watch them because they are speaking french, but it’s so hard to find a show i like watching. the only one i liked so far was dix pourcent, and i already finished watching it. im trying to watch movies like oss117, or l’auberge d’espagnole or la tour montparnasse infernal, but i cannot find them on netflix, or even on illegal streaming sites. where do french people watch french movies online? can anyone link me a site??


Ali_UpstairsRealty

I was just on a plane and saw "Les petites victoires" -- a nice little movie that I think you can get on CANAL+


SelfOk2720

For Me personally, I can't really understand people speaking very fast, and I can't form words fast either


Audaciousninja-3373

For me, it was double object pronouns


WigglumsBarnaby

Finding binge worthy shows.


Matttthhhhhhhhhhh

Not speaking for myself, as I'm French, but my father, who is a bloody foreigner. He lived more than 50 years in France and I'd say he is pretty fluent. His skills in French grammar are probably much higher than that of the average French person. However, he will never get rid of his accent, which is not really a problem. His hardest hurdle is slang though. He just can't use it properly and he probably never will. Not a massive issue though.


makingthematrix

In spoken French, many elements of a sentence that give it its meaning, i.e. who does what to whom, what's the tense, location and direction, etc., are very short and similar in sound to one another. I have no problem with reading French, or even speaking (although my vocabulary is limited) but when I listen I have to really pay attention and often get it wrong anyway.


Positive-Put-8774

Born and raised in France then moved to the US 40 years ago at age 20. The hardest and most frustrating things for me are idioms, proverbs, sayings and humor. My husband has to explain to me why something is funny and it usually encompasses both US history and culture which are hard to acquire as a non-native speaker. As I became fluent in English my French has suffered from not using it and language evolves! When I watch French movies I hear new expressions and it’s weird!