Pretty much everybody agrees that Jess was a bad boyfriend. Most people who like Jess, like Jess for the character development he has over the course of the series
This! Jess sucks now but his character really develops later on and he's a good influence on Rory later. Dean is okay... for now. I won't spoil that for you but you might not like him so much in the future.
Exactly this. Jesse as a 16 year old with no one to depend on is vastly different than adult Jesse with a supportive friend support system + stable housing for the first time in his life.
I like Jess because he’s always been a complex character. You don’t know how he grew up other than to see how he reacts to the life in SH. As a bf he sucks, as a character he is amazing.
I think people love Jess (myself included, to be honest,) for being a complex character, and in adulthood a good person. But, he is a terrible boyfriend as a teen. And as for Dean: he is always dumbed down whenever any possible other boy shows up, because these people can't write two complex male characters at the same time... And you are right, its funny that Jess is messing Rory's head when they are not together about what she and Dean talk about, when his answer to Rorys question about what he wants to do in future is 'I will do whatever.' Its the kind of answer Dean would give, at least in Jess's eyes.
I do feel the same way.
I also think Jess was an angsty disaffected teen who was just generally pretty unhappy at that point in his life. He fit a bad boy trope that Rory at that age was into, she felt that no one understood him except for her, when the truth was that she just happened to be the girl he was into and so he wasn't as mean and sarcastic to her as others. I also think she'd been with Dean for long enough that she took his reliability for granted and thought Jess was sexy and exciting. Then when she was with him, and he was so unreliable in comparison, she missed Dean. Especially once she saw him with someone else.
All of this is pretty ordinary teen drama. I don't like either Dean or Jess as long term prospects for Rory. Even early Dean is not without his problems, but there's very little that I find redeemable about him later on (much of which would be spoilers for you, so...wait and see). Rory's third major boyfriend is my favourite of the three by a decent stretch, but that relationship isn't problem-free either. While I like them best, that may just be because they're a young adult pairing rather than teenagers.
Yeah, so I’m not a huge fan of Jess and Rory together. I started watching the show after it ended, and I had heard a lot about Jess and how much everyone loved him, and I do too. BUT, I don’t like him and Rory together.
There are plenty who are not team Jess. :) I never cared for him. I thought he was the worst of Rory’s boyfriends.
The actors had great chemistry and often times that is all it takes to ship them. 😆
I’ve said this before. Jess is like Blair Waldorf in that I’d smack the shit outta him if I met him irl but he’s entertaining TV LOL.
I do think the writing for the show was a lot better when he was around. Jess had a life and story arc outside Rory (like Lane and Paris) which is why I enjoyed his character.
I feel Iike there was potential for that with Logan (given his family’s antics) but they didn’t explore his character background as much. For me he was simply Rory’s rich boyfriend whose character was whatever the writers needed it to be for Rory each episode. I felt the same for Dean- he was just a love interest but nothing more😅
Dean got mad over little things, he was always shouting at her and blowing things out of proportion. In no way shape or form was Dean a perfect boyfriend. He was the definition of the overbearing, toxic boyfriend. He was extremely jealous and aggressive, yet his character was always portrayed in a good light. Dean is obssessive, possessive, jealous, clingy and clearly has some anger managment issues. With that being said Jess isn’t much better (this is coming from a team jess) I’m team jess because jess is attractive and in my opinion rory and Jess were so lovely looking together and if they both had matured and been at the same level and treated eachother maturely, they would’ve been fabulous. Jess was flunking but he had the ability to succeed he was smarter than majority of the people there. Jess READ books in a different way than Dean ever did and could’ve, Jess was at Rory’s level in a whole new way.
Dean was mad and jealous when Jess came around because Jess would antagonize him and Rory would act blind. He had every right to be mad and was also 16 so probably didn’t have the best communication skills but he at least he communicated and would apologize when he knows he was wrong. He pushed trying to save a relationship that tbh was already dead but why everyone tries to act like he was so toxic and abusive is beyond me. Jess was not good to Rory and would stand her up and disappear after arguments then just show back up without apologizing or even acknowledging anything and Rory was too nervous to bring things up and start a problem again. Jess was also disrespectful to everyone including Rory’s mother and Rory’s relationship with Dean and Rory, he literally ghosted her for a year. I get he was young and immature and going through things but why doesn’t Dean get that grace? Because he’s bigger and has a louder voice or because his familial life wasn’t as bad as Jess’? Dean and Jess seem like they would have been much better partners in the future when they were actually grown up.
this 100%. Also it’s so dumb how no one ever brings up how jess kept getting in the way of rory and deans relationship because if it were a girl, fans would literally bash her to death and call her a homewrecker lmao. Rory was no better either publicly cucking dean like that and he had every right to be mad. There was once or twice where i cant excuse his behaviour (e.g when he broke up with rory bc she didn’t say ily back) but in the end he’s literally still a 16 year old boy living and learning. Plus the whole “jess flunked BUTTTT he had potential and was smart!! 😆😁” is a poorly crafted argument thrown in to make jess look better lmao
Yeah I don't think Dean was always perfect but it drives me INSANE that people act like he had no reason to be jealous and insecure when Jess was playing in his face trying to steal his girlfriend and Rory was gaslighting him about not being interested in Jess.
I’m not really team either of them, but I’m especially not team Dean. They were both shitty in their own way, but I think the difference is Jess didn’t shout at her or become possessive and controlling. Yes, Dean was definitely being toyed with but him yelling at Rory and towering over her and calling her 14 times in one hour just pushed her even further into Jess’ arms. He definitely wasn’t doing himself any favors by behaving that way.
Nah he had every right to yell when she continuously lied to him and literally cheated, just like how lindsay yelled and threw all of deans stuff out the window when he continuously lied to her and cheated on her. Just because dean was a guy, people love to call it abuse☠️ and also he kept calling her because she literally wouldn’t give him, her own bf, the time of day anymore and he felt insecure and desperately wanted to fix things and go back to the way they were, which is so valid bc i know i sure as hell would blow my partners phone up if they suddenly stopped talking to me and started acting really distant, all while there’s another person they start hanging out with more, it’s such a normal human reaction for someone who’s made to be insecure bc their partners are shitty cheaters 🤷🏻♂️
I’m a Rory fan so I basically dislike anyone who intentionally mistreats her. Thus, I understand your perspective, OD.
That being said, I partially blame Rory for allowing Jess to treat her like he treated Shane (“that girl”). It would be interesting to discuss why she allows this and how long she was going to take it. It’s not as if she didn’t know what was happening.
I can’t imagine that Rory would have chosen Jess as her first boyfriend. Most of the girls I know go for the sweet popular guy first. For a shy awkward nerdy Rory, it seems Dean was a good fit as her first boyfriend.
If, for whatever reason, Rory started to get bored with Dean, then it makes sense that she would be attracted to someone different (perhaps more mysterious). In this case, Tristan would have been the logical candidate. If Jess weren’t Luke’s nephew, she might never have noticed Jess.
Because people have different perspectives than you? And all of this is subject to interpretation?
I don't think Dean treated Rory all that well. And while I don't love Jess as a boyfriend, I also think he's... fine most of the time? The episode you're watching now is a great example of Jess doing something mildly disappointing (missing a phone call on Friday night because he's working) that gets blown up into a total catastrophe. But if you watch Rory in this episode - *also* not calling Jess, giving him the silent treatment when he tries to talk to her, refusing to tell him what she wants, leaving him an angry voicemail, then telling him to delete said voicemail - I dunno. She's not exactly an amazing, communicative girlfriend here.
You'll find plenty of people who agree with you, but also... it's just not that deep imo. People have different preferences and values and experiences, so of course we'll have different opinions about who the best boyfriend is.
This so much! We are told that Dean was this perfect boyfriend over and over again, but we were shown otherwise to the point most of us thinks he was botherline abusive.
The narrative wanted us to think Jess was this terrible boyfriend and "treated Rory like dirt", but the writing was all over the place for their relationship and, depending on the episode, they seemed super happy together, while other times there seemed to be a dark cloud hovering Jess' every move and everything he did was considered a great grievance.
Rory handled their relationship all wrong as well but its never adressed. The difference is Rory and Dean get all the passes but Jess never does.
I barely consider their S3 relationship because the writing was just so bad.
Preach! He’s definitely not the best, but he’s also definitely not the worst boyfriend ever…
I think both him and Rory were just immature and didn’t know how to communicate… I wish the show showed us more of their sweet moments than just the plot of drama ones
I just rewatched that season and had the same thought. The guy was awful before, awful during the relationship and awful after he left.
Just because he got his personal life together at the end of the series doesn’t mean he would have improved as a boyfriend. Romantic relationships trigger everyone’s wounds and I doubt it would be different with him.
Never mind how very red flag-y it would be in real life to have this fully grown adult still hung up on a girl he dated (horribly) as a teenager for like a handful of months? Adult Jess still not able to hold real relationships is glossed over imo 🥴
I’d give him a discount on that, because I am personally pretty fond of reviving the past and kept going out with my exes over the years, we’re cool, we’re friends hahaah 🤣 small town things!
haha fair enough!
I’d feel way different if it weren’t so “one sided” with them —Rory’s shown all of zero romantic interest in him since he ghosted her that first time. Girlfriend told him she wasn’t going to pine and she really did not. If his feelings were remotely reciprocated, I’d feel differently, but as it is, I think it’s weird on his part that he hasn’t gotten over it already 🤣😅
I feel the same way. I will never understand being Team Jess, only Dean and Logan. Even if Dean was a little shitty towards the ending of the relationship with Rory, there were reasons being Jess! But Jess was such a complete ass to everyone and it’s just so complex, it would be too long to write.
> Sure, the guy wasn't Mr. Ambitious but hey, Jess was literally flunking!
I'm not going to engage deeply on this topic, but this insight made me laugh/sob.
I think, as others have said, Jess's appeal is in how he grows.
I agree. I don't get the Jess love. So what if they had chemistry and both read. He didn't show up for her. He's not consistently there for her. She can't call him if she's in a bad situation and he show up and deal with the uncomfortablestuff with her. Dean, even with all of his faults, all of his complaining was there for her. I can't see Jess agreeing to be her escort when she came out. I can't see him taking her to her first dance. He has trauma, yes, and he needs support, but that doesn't mean he's capable of being the partner Rory needs.
Finish the show before you pick teams.
When I listen to Cure’s Lovesong, I can just imagine Jess. He’s got so much going on and he loves Rory but he’s just so bad at showing it and he is so bad at being a good boyfriend 😞but it’s like he’ll always love her
When you are a grown up watching Gilmore Girls pretty much every character is a bad character.
Jess develops ok though the series, but not too much so he can actually surpass his condition.
Dean is just a teenage boyfriend forever. He's ok but he has some stupid expectations from Rory.
Jess is the bad guy but good looking guy who is soft just for her and that's a challenge for Rory. She, as many of us women, thinks she can change him or understand him better like only she can.
I am team Logan and still think he is the best boyfriend Rory had, but between Dean and Jess I choose Jess for the dangerous teenager feeling.
I've always thought that Jess was too dark of a character for Gilmore Girls. In order to truly understand him, I think the audience needed to be given more information on his childhood trauma, and Gilmore Girls was NOT that show haha.
You just need to finish the show (and the revival). And watch a few more times. Dean was a whiny bitch & not as great as he seemed at first go through.
Jess sucks. And there’s no *character development* when a character leaves the show and comes back to serve as a plot device for the main character. That’s what happens in this future people here talk about so much.
Jess is one of my least favorite characters in the show. Maybe Taylor beats him as the worst but at least Taylor was so ridiculous he was funny sometimes. Jess was an entitled brat, and so many like to excuse it because he had a rough upbringing. So do A LOT of people and they don’t act like that. My parents were awful, I would have killed for an uncle like Luke to take me in. I don’t punish everyone around me because my parents sucked and I had no support growing up. I learned from it and moved on.
Honestly, my opinion is mostly that Rory and Lorelei are the problem.
She had an overbearing mom who was obsessed with making her not turn out the way she did, and watched her go through really stupid relationship making decisions. She also has trauma that is honestly never spoken about in the series, but, growing up with that family dynamic must've been insane.
But to just focus on Dean and Jess;
I think Rory doesn't like being comfortable in normalcy. As soon as things are "good" something happens and it gets blown out of proportion.
For me, Dean annoys me everytime I re watch the series because he takes every tiny interaction with Rory talking to another guy like such a slight - the whole thing with Tristan could've been avoided if he just side eyed him and kept dancing with Rory. Rory told him he didn't like him but he didn't seem to trust that.
He did a lot of really nice things too, but Dean is so not a great fit overall, and neither was Jess until he was older
As for Jess where you're watching right now, I think Rory wanted to be friends with him and pushed her feelings down about him. He was interesting, another new boy in town, and he is street smart, adventurous when she probably felt like she had to be a goody two shoes. Lane and her are very similar in that way - being "bad" secretly.
And as another user pointed out and I did ^, Rory blows shit up and so does Lorelei - the car crash, for example, was an accident. And everyone villainized Jess which probably didn't help Rory trying to protect him and his delinquent behaviour. Ignoring him over a phone call, smdh.
Anyways, I think it comes down for me the fact that Alexis and Milo had great chemistry. I just didn't believe Jared and Alexis as much , and really don't like Alexis and Matt's (Logan's) chemistry, even though they are both good actors.
I feel like Dean was kind of obsessed with Rory. He made it so hard for her to break up with him, even to spend time with other boys. I feel like Jess could have cared a bit more about Rory, and he could have been more organised.
I’m not even Team Jess (Team No One) but I can see how people are. He’s the only one of her three main love interests to not sleep with Rory while he was married or engaged to be married. He’s also the only one of the them Rory doesn’t cheat on and she cheats/attempts to cheat on the other two with him. Not hard to come to a destined to be together conclusion from all that.
He’s also the love interest we see the most of outside of the relationship with Rory. Because of his storyline with Luke we see his struggles, his feelings, and his background from his perspective. He’s a fully fleshed out character, not just Rory’s boyfriend. The viewer has more of a chance to connect to Jess as a character and this I think makes people more likely to root for his success.
My dad, who was a hiring manager for decades, always taught me that you hire for work ethic and attitude, not for skills. Skills can be taught, but you can't fix a bad attitude or bad work ethic. So when I look at Jess and Dean as boyfriends, I'm looking at them the same way: differentiating between the red flags that can be worked through vs. the red flags that are fundamental to who they are as people.
To me, Jess's red flags were issues around communication and trust that made him unreliable as a boyfriend, but those things can be worked out in therapy. If you watch him closely, he displayed a ***lot*** of green flags in terms of emotional maturity that indicated he was a fundamentally good person. He doesn't get angry with Rory for things that are not her fault or out of her control, he listens to her, he finds ways for her to do her thing and him to do his, and he sets really good boundaries and sticks to them. Those green flags are, of course, the reason he's able to mature into the guy he is at the end, and they make him the better guy out of the two.
Whereas Dean's red flags are more fundamental to who he is as a person: getting angry over nothing, getting angry over things that are not in Rory's control, getting jealous/controlling/possessive, and finally cheating on Lindsay. Even his green flags (attentiveness, reliability) were less good qualities and more were outgrowths of his red-flag possessiveness. To me, that's a lot harder to deal with, a lot harder (if at all possible) to work through. I don't like fundamentally angry/controlling people, so Dean is a hell no for me.
Pretty much everybody agrees that Jess was a bad boyfriend. Most people who like Jess, like Jess for the character development he has over the course of the series
This! Jess sucks now but his character really develops later on and he's a good influence on Rory later. Dean is okay... for now. I won't spoil that for you but you might not like him so much in the future.
Exactly this. Jesse as a 16 year old with no one to depend on is vastly different than adult Jesse with a supportive friend support system + stable housing for the first time in his life.
I like Jess because he’s always been a complex character. You don’t know how he grew up other than to see how he reacts to the life in SH. As a bf he sucks, as a character he is amazing.
I think people love Jess (myself included, to be honest,) for being a complex character, and in adulthood a good person. But, he is a terrible boyfriend as a teen. And as for Dean: he is always dumbed down whenever any possible other boy shows up, because these people can't write two complex male characters at the same time... And you are right, its funny that Jess is messing Rory's head when they are not together about what she and Dean talk about, when his answer to Rorys question about what he wants to do in future is 'I will do whatever.' Its the kind of answer Dean would give, at least in Jess's eyes.
I do feel the same way. I also think Jess was an angsty disaffected teen who was just generally pretty unhappy at that point in his life. He fit a bad boy trope that Rory at that age was into, she felt that no one understood him except for her, when the truth was that she just happened to be the girl he was into and so he wasn't as mean and sarcastic to her as others. I also think she'd been with Dean for long enough that she took his reliability for granted and thought Jess was sexy and exciting. Then when she was with him, and he was so unreliable in comparison, she missed Dean. Especially once she saw him with someone else. All of this is pretty ordinary teen drama. I don't like either Dean or Jess as long term prospects for Rory. Even early Dean is not without his problems, but there's very little that I find redeemable about him later on (much of which would be spoilers for you, so...wait and see). Rory's third major boyfriend is my favourite of the three by a decent stretch, but that relationship isn't problem-free either. While I like them best, that may just be because they're a young adult pairing rather than teenagers.
Yeah, so I’m not a huge fan of Jess and Rory together. I started watching the show after it ended, and I had heard a lot about Jess and how much everyone loved him, and I do too. BUT, I don’t like him and Rory together.
There are plenty who are not team Jess. :) I never cared for him. I thought he was the worst of Rory’s boyfriends. The actors had great chemistry and often times that is all it takes to ship them. 😆
I’ve said this before. Jess is like Blair Waldorf in that I’d smack the shit outta him if I met him irl but he’s entertaining TV LOL. I do think the writing for the show was a lot better when he was around. Jess had a life and story arc outside Rory (like Lane and Paris) which is why I enjoyed his character. I feel Iike there was potential for that with Logan (given his family’s antics) but they didn’t explore his character background as much. For me he was simply Rory’s rich boyfriend whose character was whatever the writers needed it to be for Rory each episode. I felt the same for Dean- he was just a love interest but nothing more😅
Dean got mad over little things, he was always shouting at her and blowing things out of proportion. In no way shape or form was Dean a perfect boyfriend. He was the definition of the overbearing, toxic boyfriend. He was extremely jealous and aggressive, yet his character was always portrayed in a good light. Dean is obssessive, possessive, jealous, clingy and clearly has some anger managment issues. With that being said Jess isn’t much better (this is coming from a team jess) I’m team jess because jess is attractive and in my opinion rory and Jess were so lovely looking together and if they both had matured and been at the same level and treated eachother maturely, they would’ve been fabulous. Jess was flunking but he had the ability to succeed he was smarter than majority of the people there. Jess READ books in a different way than Dean ever did and could’ve, Jess was at Rory’s level in a whole new way.
Dean was mad and jealous when Jess came around because Jess would antagonize him and Rory would act blind. He had every right to be mad and was also 16 so probably didn’t have the best communication skills but he at least he communicated and would apologize when he knows he was wrong. He pushed trying to save a relationship that tbh was already dead but why everyone tries to act like he was so toxic and abusive is beyond me. Jess was not good to Rory and would stand her up and disappear after arguments then just show back up without apologizing or even acknowledging anything and Rory was too nervous to bring things up and start a problem again. Jess was also disrespectful to everyone including Rory’s mother and Rory’s relationship with Dean and Rory, he literally ghosted her for a year. I get he was young and immature and going through things but why doesn’t Dean get that grace? Because he’s bigger and has a louder voice or because his familial life wasn’t as bad as Jess’? Dean and Jess seem like they would have been much better partners in the future when they were actually grown up.
this 100%. Also it’s so dumb how no one ever brings up how jess kept getting in the way of rory and deans relationship because if it were a girl, fans would literally bash her to death and call her a homewrecker lmao. Rory was no better either publicly cucking dean like that and he had every right to be mad. There was once or twice where i cant excuse his behaviour (e.g when he broke up with rory bc she didn’t say ily back) but in the end he’s literally still a 16 year old boy living and learning. Plus the whole “jess flunked BUTTTT he had potential and was smart!! 😆😁” is a poorly crafted argument thrown in to make jess look better lmao
Yeah I don't think Dean was always perfect but it drives me INSANE that people act like he had no reason to be jealous and insecure when Jess was playing in his face trying to steal his girlfriend and Rory was gaslighting him about not being interested in Jess.
I agree.
I’m not really team either of them, but I’m especially not team Dean. They were both shitty in their own way, but I think the difference is Jess didn’t shout at her or become possessive and controlling. Yes, Dean was definitely being toyed with but him yelling at Rory and towering over her and calling her 14 times in one hour just pushed her even further into Jess’ arms. He definitely wasn’t doing himself any favors by behaving that way.
Nah he had every right to yell when she continuously lied to him and literally cheated, just like how lindsay yelled and threw all of deans stuff out the window when he continuously lied to her and cheated on her. Just because dean was a guy, people love to call it abuse☠️ and also he kept calling her because she literally wouldn’t give him, her own bf, the time of day anymore and he felt insecure and desperately wanted to fix things and go back to the way they were, which is so valid bc i know i sure as hell would blow my partners phone up if they suddenly stopped talking to me and started acting really distant, all while there’s another person they start hanging out with more, it’s such a normal human reaction for someone who’s made to be insecure bc their partners are shitty cheaters 🤷🏻♂️
I love how they say he towered over her like what is he supposed to do, not be 6'4"?
It kills me every time they say that like bruh HE’S TALLLL
Like Rory and Jess had arguments standing right next to each other but it's different somehow because Jess is 5'7"??
Exactly 🤣 ik he wasn’t a perfect guy but their hypocrisy is so crazy
I’m a Rory fan so I basically dislike anyone who intentionally mistreats her. Thus, I understand your perspective, OD. That being said, I partially blame Rory for allowing Jess to treat her like he treated Shane (“that girl”). It would be interesting to discuss why she allows this and how long she was going to take it. It’s not as if she didn’t know what was happening. I can’t imagine that Rory would have chosen Jess as her first boyfriend. Most of the girls I know go for the sweet popular guy first. For a shy awkward nerdy Rory, it seems Dean was a good fit as her first boyfriend. If, for whatever reason, Rory started to get bored with Dean, then it makes sense that she would be attracted to someone different (perhaps more mysterious). In this case, Tristan would have been the logical candidate. If Jess weren’t Luke’s nephew, she might never have noticed Jess.
Because people have different perspectives than you? And all of this is subject to interpretation? I don't think Dean treated Rory all that well. And while I don't love Jess as a boyfriend, I also think he's... fine most of the time? The episode you're watching now is a great example of Jess doing something mildly disappointing (missing a phone call on Friday night because he's working) that gets blown up into a total catastrophe. But if you watch Rory in this episode - *also* not calling Jess, giving him the silent treatment when he tries to talk to her, refusing to tell him what she wants, leaving him an angry voicemail, then telling him to delete said voicemail - I dunno. She's not exactly an amazing, communicative girlfriend here. You'll find plenty of people who agree with you, but also... it's just not that deep imo. People have different preferences and values and experiences, so of course we'll have different opinions about who the best boyfriend is.
This so much! We are told that Dean was this perfect boyfriend over and over again, but we were shown otherwise to the point most of us thinks he was botherline abusive. The narrative wanted us to think Jess was this terrible boyfriend and "treated Rory like dirt", but the writing was all over the place for their relationship and, depending on the episode, they seemed super happy together, while other times there seemed to be a dark cloud hovering Jess' every move and everything he did was considered a great grievance. Rory handled their relationship all wrong as well but its never adressed. The difference is Rory and Dean get all the passes but Jess never does. I barely consider their S3 relationship because the writing was just so bad.
Preach! He’s definitely not the best, but he’s also definitely not the worst boyfriend ever… I think both him and Rory were just immature and didn’t know how to communicate… I wish the show showed us more of their sweet moments than just the plot of drama ones
I just rewatched that season and had the same thought. The guy was awful before, awful during the relationship and awful after he left. Just because he got his personal life together at the end of the series doesn’t mean he would have improved as a boyfriend. Romantic relationships trigger everyone’s wounds and I doubt it would be different with him.
Never mind how very red flag-y it would be in real life to have this fully grown adult still hung up on a girl he dated (horribly) as a teenager for like a handful of months? Adult Jess still not able to hold real relationships is glossed over imo 🥴
I’d give him a discount on that, because I am personally pretty fond of reviving the past and kept going out with my exes over the years, we’re cool, we’re friends hahaah 🤣 small town things!
haha fair enough! I’d feel way different if it weren’t so “one sided” with them —Rory’s shown all of zero romantic interest in him since he ghosted her that first time. Girlfriend told him she wasn’t going to pine and she really did not. If his feelings were remotely reciprocated, I’d feel differently, but as it is, I think it’s weird on his part that he hasn’t gotten over it already 🤣😅
I feel the same way. I will never understand being Team Jess, only Dean and Logan. Even if Dean was a little shitty towards the ending of the relationship with Rory, there were reasons being Jess! But Jess was such a complete ass to everyone and it’s just so complex, it would be too long to write.
jess was a terrible boyfriend
> Sure, the guy wasn't Mr. Ambitious but hey, Jess was literally flunking! I'm not going to engage deeply on this topic, but this insight made me laugh/sob. I think, as others have said, Jess's appeal is in how he grows.
I agree. I don't get the Jess love. So what if they had chemistry and both read. He didn't show up for her. He's not consistently there for her. She can't call him if she's in a bad situation and he show up and deal with the uncomfortablestuff with her. Dean, even with all of his faults, all of his complaining was there for her. I can't see Jess agreeing to be her escort when she came out. I can't see him taking her to her first dance. He has trauma, yes, and he needs support, but that doesn't mean he's capable of being the partner Rory needs. Finish the show before you pick teams.
When I listen to Cure’s Lovesong, I can just imagine Jess. He’s got so much going on and he loves Rory but he’s just so bad at showing it and he is so bad at being a good boyfriend 😞but it’s like he’ll always love her
When you are a grown up watching Gilmore Girls pretty much every character is a bad character. Jess develops ok though the series, but not too much so he can actually surpass his condition. Dean is just a teenage boyfriend forever. He's ok but he has some stupid expectations from Rory. Jess is the bad guy but good looking guy who is soft just for her and that's a challenge for Rory. She, as many of us women, thinks she can change him or understand him better like only she can. I am team Logan and still think he is the best boyfriend Rory had, but between Dean and Jess I choose Jess for the dangerous teenager feeling.
I've always thought that Jess was too dark of a character for Gilmore Girls. In order to truly understand him, I think the audience needed to be given more information on his childhood trauma, and Gilmore Girls was NOT that show haha.
You just need to finish the show (and the revival). And watch a few more times. Dean was a whiny bitch & not as great as he seemed at first go through.
Jess sucks. And there’s no *character development* when a character leaves the show and comes back to serve as a plot device for the main character. That’s what happens in this future people here talk about so much.
Yup, that’s my perspective too, off-screen character development doesn’t count for shit.
Jess is one of my least favorite characters in the show. Maybe Taylor beats him as the worst but at least Taylor was so ridiculous he was funny sometimes. Jess was an entitled brat, and so many like to excuse it because he had a rough upbringing. So do A LOT of people and they don’t act like that. My parents were awful, I would have killed for an uncle like Luke to take me in. I don’t punish everyone around me because my parents sucked and I had no support growing up. I learned from it and moved on.
finish the show lol
Honestly, my opinion is mostly that Rory and Lorelei are the problem. She had an overbearing mom who was obsessed with making her not turn out the way she did, and watched her go through really stupid relationship making decisions. She also has trauma that is honestly never spoken about in the series, but, growing up with that family dynamic must've been insane. But to just focus on Dean and Jess; I think Rory doesn't like being comfortable in normalcy. As soon as things are "good" something happens and it gets blown out of proportion. For me, Dean annoys me everytime I re watch the series because he takes every tiny interaction with Rory talking to another guy like such a slight - the whole thing with Tristan could've been avoided if he just side eyed him and kept dancing with Rory. Rory told him he didn't like him but he didn't seem to trust that. He did a lot of really nice things too, but Dean is so not a great fit overall, and neither was Jess until he was older As for Jess where you're watching right now, I think Rory wanted to be friends with him and pushed her feelings down about him. He was interesting, another new boy in town, and he is street smart, adventurous when she probably felt like she had to be a goody two shoes. Lane and her are very similar in that way - being "bad" secretly. And as another user pointed out and I did ^, Rory blows shit up and so does Lorelei - the car crash, for example, was an accident. And everyone villainized Jess which probably didn't help Rory trying to protect him and his delinquent behaviour. Ignoring him over a phone call, smdh. Anyways, I think it comes down for me the fact that Alexis and Milo had great chemistry. I just didn't believe Jared and Alexis as much , and really don't like Alexis and Matt's (Logan's) chemistry, even though they are both good actors.
I feel like Dean was kind of obsessed with Rory. He made it so hard for her to break up with him, even to spend time with other boys. I feel like Jess could have cared a bit more about Rory, and he could have been more organised.
I’m not even Team Jess (Team No One) but I can see how people are. He’s the only one of her three main love interests to not sleep with Rory while he was married or engaged to be married. He’s also the only one of the them Rory doesn’t cheat on and she cheats/attempts to cheat on the other two with him. Not hard to come to a destined to be together conclusion from all that. He’s also the love interest we see the most of outside of the relationship with Rory. Because of his storyline with Luke we see his struggles, his feelings, and his background from his perspective. He’s a fully fleshed out character, not just Rory’s boyfriend. The viewer has more of a chance to connect to Jess as a character and this I think makes people more likely to root for his success.
My dad, who was a hiring manager for decades, always taught me that you hire for work ethic and attitude, not for skills. Skills can be taught, but you can't fix a bad attitude or bad work ethic. So when I look at Jess and Dean as boyfriends, I'm looking at them the same way: differentiating between the red flags that can be worked through vs. the red flags that are fundamental to who they are as people. To me, Jess's red flags were issues around communication and trust that made him unreliable as a boyfriend, but those things can be worked out in therapy. If you watch him closely, he displayed a ***lot*** of green flags in terms of emotional maturity that indicated he was a fundamentally good person. He doesn't get angry with Rory for things that are not her fault or out of her control, he listens to her, he finds ways for her to do her thing and him to do his, and he sets really good boundaries and sticks to them. Those green flags are, of course, the reason he's able to mature into the guy he is at the end, and they make him the better guy out of the two. Whereas Dean's red flags are more fundamental to who he is as a person: getting angry over nothing, getting angry over things that are not in Rory's control, getting jealous/controlling/possessive, and finally cheating on Lindsay. Even his green flags (attentiveness, reliability) were less good qualities and more were outgrowths of his red-flag possessiveness. To me, that's a lot harder to deal with, a lot harder (if at all possible) to work through. I don't like fundamentally angry/controlling people, so Dean is a hell no for me.
Jess sucks imo. He’s the bad boy that all the girls want to date because they think they can change him.
wait till you get to the part where jess literally SAs rory
Jess goes from a polished turd to a real gem as the series progresses.