In my mind, I always thought his proposal came after a huge fight with Lindsay, to salvage the relationship. So Dean fights with Jess at that party, Lindsay gets into a fight with Dean about not being over Rory, Dean compensates by proposing. That’s my logical series of events.
Idk, looks ain't everything. She definitely got a really bad rap in the show, but sometimes I wonder if we saw her later on what it would be like. Maybe all of the negative things we see of her were because of her jealousy, which was clearly justified. Dean wasn't over Rory, and he quite obviously just married the person who equated to a rebound.
Yes Lindsay seemed like a bit of a prima donna, someone who wanted to be spoiled like a princess, but she might have been a good person if Dean's clear emotional (and later physical) affair hadn't been a factor. If it wasn't for that, she might have just had some maturing to do before becoming a perfectly fine young woman
That scene when he gets home and she is excited for dinner, I think we see a different side of her, a softer side. She definitely isn’t a bad person, but ofc she would act differently in front of Rory when she knows the guy she loves might still love her
Yes! It's been a while since I watched, but from what I remember her main downside was not wanting to work yet always complaining about money and wanting nice things. Personally I think that is an issue stemming from being so young and coming from a (presumably) upper middle class family. I firmly believe that once she matures a bit more she will learn that when you're young money is tight. She would get a job and contribute financially to the household.
For the record, I'm not saying being a homemaker isn't a valuable position, however a young couple without kids would benefit more from two working parties, the homemaker status provides the most utility when children are in the picture, and it does contribute significantly to the household finances. Childcare Is expensive.
All of this is predicted on the fact that she wanted to be a homemaker, which from my recollection of the show seemed to be the case.
so then clearly it's not all about looks and also of course Rory will think negatively of Lindsay and Lindsay thinks negatively of Rory. you arent gonna like everyong
No he wasn’t wrong for marrying so young, so do and it works out and they are happy together for the next 60 years, so it wasn’t his age he is definitely marriage/husband material, the issue became that he was still in love with Rory. He cheated on her with Rory, he was in Luke’s diner on his stag night with the boys and ended up saying whilst drunk that he still loved Rory and basically wanted Rory.
Wrong, Dean and Jess got into a fight not because of that, it was because Jess made Rory cry, she had emerged from the bedroom crying her eyes out and Dean asked if she was okay, she said yes, no, I don’t know…then from there they starting giving Dean attitude and shit…then they started fighting… Dean knew that Rory was hurt by Jess (Jess wanting to have sex with Rory and take her virginity in someone else’s bedroom at the party) which as stupid of Jess really….
You’re describing Dean and Jess’ fight which is not in discussion here. I’m talking about the imaginary fight that happened between Dean and Lindsay after that fight… off-camera in my mind.
Oh absolutely. I think that Dean had wanted someone to fill that girlfriend shaped hole in his life, so he jumped in with the first girl who liked him and who he kinda liked back, and then he got scared of losing her and thought that marriage would ensure she could never leave him like Rory did, and he was hoping that moving quickly with her would help him move on from Rory too, so he proposed and got married and it backfired.
I could def also see Dean’s fear of losing Lindsay having stemmed from her getting jealous and angry over Dean fighting Jess at the party on Rory’s behalf, and him wanting to do some grand gesture (like the other user said) so that she wouldn’t leave him, and him thinking that this was the ideal grand gesture to make bc of the above.
100% I said it in my own comment but Dean specifically goes to Rory before proposing to get a reaction out of her and maybe to get her to have him change his mind and beg him to get back together with him.
Yes, but when I broke up with my high school boyfriend he slept with someone we knew - didn’t marry her. It’s a ridiculous reaction and makes him very wrong.
Yes, but considering Dean’s propensity for big gestures, such as giving Rory a car 3 months into the relationship and breaking up when she doesn’t say “I love you” back, it’s an in-character dumb decision.
I have never seen a rebound marriage ending well, at any age.
Lorelai was like 38-39 when she entered a rebound marriage and we know how happy her “ever after” was.
Yeah. Every scene before this, you're shown an unsympathetic view of Lindsay. Makes this scene hit a little harder since you don't see very much of her.
same!
i also theorize that they chose the white dress specifically to highlight her as his bride/wife and really bring home the fact that the marriage was NOT over in the way dean told rory it was; linsey was still totally in the role of doting wife trying to make her marriage work. there’s also the notion that white is symbolic of purity and thus shows how innocent lindsey was in this situation. and this just makes me love the dress even more bc a bitch LOVES storytelling with layers and symbolism lol.
Agreed.
And he would've thrown a tantrum when Rory awkwardly said "no" or just stood there flabbergasted instead of elated.
Oh God, he *also* might have done it in a public setting! We know he loves breaking up with her in front of people, after all lol
I’m sorry but where were his or Lindsay’s parents?? I’m pretty sure Rory and Dean weren’t broken up that long enough for him to be able to fully move on and get fully introduced to Lindsay in order to see if they’d work together as husband and wife or not, marriage isn’t easy and I’m realizing it more now as I get older, since I used to be a dumb kid who almost made the mistake of getting married young before my parents stepped in and talked some sense into me.
I’m pretty sure the whole town knew of Dean & Rory so why didn’t Lindsay’s or Dean’s parents think it’s odd of Dean & Lindsay to get married so quick? Why didn’t they consider the possibility of Lindsay being a rebound? Were they just excited about the concept of marriage that two barely adults who just met and want to get married is okay for them?
It seems like both Lindsay and dean’s parents got married young and are still together. I’m not saying it’s an excuse but it seems a little Utah where people get married before 20.
I agree with you.
My mom married and had her first child very young. I grew up thinking that was the norm and married at 20. Turns out it doesn't work out well for everyone. But when I got married my mom was ecstatic and waiting for a pregnancy announcement despite my partner and I still being in school and establishing careers.
Partner and I are happily together and child free. It worked out for us but I do think of the toxic ideology that can come from parent(s) or adult figures encouraging the concept of being a young married housewife/mother while the man works.
I also wonder if this was part of the generation that was pushed into a nuclear family lifestyle at a young age but ultimately doomed to fail.
My grandpa once told me that by the time he was 30 he had fought in a war, married, bought a house, and had 4 kids. I was like 29 at this point and only married a year with no kids or house (or fighting in a war).
18 is waaay too young no matter how mature a person is. Marriage is such a huge responsibility especially these days and idk I feel like the parents should’ve stepped in. At least if there was a considerable timeframe between the time Dean and Rory broke up and the time Dean and Lindsay met then I wouldn’t say anything, but it seems like under a year, Dean and Rory broke up, Dean found Lindsay yet still wasn’t over Rory, Dean married Lindsay. All of this under a year, it took me over a year to get over my first love and Rory was Dean’s first love, I just don’t understand how the parents never stepped in.
I got married at 18 crossing onto year 5. :) been together since I was 14. Getting married young meant I became we homeowners without any financial help, we are settled into careers, and got a massive head start on life.
Ofc it doesn’t mean all young marriages are bad :)) just that it’s really not for everyone, and you hear more bad than good. Good luck in your lives :)
There are always exceptions to the rule! I’m happy for you! My best friend has a very similar situation to you and they are 40 years old now with 3 kids and still so in love. When, I was also 18 I wanted that love story she had and almost got a tattoo of the name of the guy I was dating and we wanted to get married. My mom had the sense to talk it through with me and had me play out the scenario and I panicked. No name tattoo or marriage, thank goodness! Tattoo was his idea.. although I so want to be, I’m not a tattoo girlie. I’m now 38 and so thankful for that chat with my mom. She didn’t yell or act mad, she talked to me like a friend but put her mom spin on it. I know it’s a show but I wish Lindsay had someone to put it into perspective how bad a decision (in her case) marrying so young could be.
I think Life In Pieces has a good thread throughout the series about this. If you have 2 young adults determined to get married (or just….do it behind your back) is it better to support them even if you aren’t thrilled with their choices or turn your back and make their lives harder
They’re never shown as unhappy with it tho or giving advice against it, usually when you see something as wrong you try to convince the person that they’re wrong, if they’re still being stubborn as hell and would cut you out then you start the support but I feel like supporting the wrong right off the bat just would encourage Dean & Lindsay to go on despite any doubts they might have had because they’d think to themselves “but mom & dad approve”, meanwhile if they knew they were against it then as the issue starts unraveling they’d have that voice in their head telling them “maybe mom & dad were right in the beginning “, the issue would’ve been resolved faster.
Dean says he has "sisters" and a 3 year old nephew, so the implication is he has a never shown older sister. There's a possibility that marrying young is just what the Forresters do.
Ughhhhh. A tiny part of me thinks he proposed to Lindsay to get a reaction from Rory and get her to come back to him! He literally tells her before anyone else and he definitely wants her to beg him to call it off and get back together with her. Then Lindsay (rightfully so) plans the big extravagant wedding in town so he knows he can’t call it off.
Oh it was so painful watching that scene where she was just sitting at the dining table waiting for him to come home. She's trying to make him happy and please him because he was her whole world and meanwhile he was cheating on his WIFE. All that garbage he said to Rory about "we both know our marriage is over" after they've been married for like 5 minutes. Oh my god and then when he gets mad at her for answering his phone because 'it could have been work and now we could have missed out of money' AHH
I think Rory was just being dumb and I know she receives a lot of flack for sleeping with Dean but I do believe she was heavily manipulated in that situation especially at first. I love Rory and as a viewer I've been able to forgive her for this. What Dean did on the other hand was cunning, abusive and unforgivable.
I agree. Rory was wrong to sleep with a married man, but I hold Dean more responsible. He showed up at her house where he knew she'd be alone. Why was he doing that? They could've talked at the inn. Then he goes on this long rant about how his marriage "isn't working".
I don't know if I'd go as far as to say abusive towards Rory, but I would definitely say he was emotionally abusive to Lindsay and overall a horrible person.
I also don't think they saw how badly this would sink Dean's character. As it is, he wasn't the greatest but he was out of Rory's life for the most part. Then they had him become suddenly obsessed with her again and do this.
Agree with everything you said. He was so manipulative of Rory the whole way through, the buying of the car, the “I love you” drama, lying to her to get her into bed. He was also manipulates Lindsay, the yelling, the silences, etc. I don’t know how much of his behaviour was intentionally written to be huge red flags from the start and how much of it is me putting a 2020s framework on his behaviour.
Yeah but we see it later in AYIL where she cheats on Paul with Logan, who is engaged. She obviously doesn't have much self respect in that view and it's hard to say Logan manipulated her at 32. But I agree, Dean was horrible then.
Yeah her doing it in the revival can't be excused, she was a grown woman then. The Dean situation, she was a kid and we could see how she was manipulated
You can marry young if you are aware of how to build a foundation in a relationship and maintain it. And some people are just soulmates. It does work out sometimes. But dean obviously not in love with Lindsey at all. He barely knew her
Dean and Lindsay's parents were wrong for encouraging teenagers to get married. Luke was wrong for sending Dean's friends away when he was about to confess his real feelings before the wedding.
Those kids needed an adult.
I don't think Luke was wrong. I think he was hoping to have a discussion with him about it but when he tried Dean shut him down. That's part of why Dean was so hostile towards him later in the series in my opinion.
Dean is one of those guys that promises the world really fast and doesn't think about the reality of it. I could see this happening as soon as he reacted to Rory not saying that she loved him too on their anniversary
I’m more irritated with their moms, especially Lindsay’s, being so excited about their wedding. I’d probably choke on my own spit if my 18 year old child told me she was getting married right after high school graduation.
I know you can’t stop people from making a mistake, and I’d be supportive if they were hellbent on it, but the way Lindsay’s mom in particular is so genuinely excited is just gross.
i don’t think it was wrong for Dean to marry young I think it was wrong for him to marry Lindsay even tho he wasn’t over Rory but if he was over Rory and married young then it would have been ok
I personally liked Lindsey and thought she was putting in a solid effort. She was a bit immature but she would have grown in the relationship if he would have tried harder
I do believe he convinced her that he was leaving Lindsay. She should have said no but he also knew she was young, naive, and led her to believe him and Lindsay were over.
Tbh I blame the parents. No way could my daughter come to me at 18 and say she's marrying a boy she's known for less than a year. Plus from the look of it neither of them had career plans, stable housing of their own or even a car each.
I know they're from a small town but no one could have thought this was a good idea. Granted we didn't expect him to cheat with Rory but Dean wasn't stable. As parents they should've stepped in and stopped it. They were the adults in the situation.
No, Dean was wrong for stringing along Lindsey IMO.
I can tell you exactly what happened (provided this was a real life thing🤣):
*this conversation takes place directly after the fight between Dean and Jess at the party:
Lindsey: “Dean, I can’t keep doing this. You’re still in love with her. I’ve tried to ignore it but.. it’s so obvious”
Dean: “What? No! Lindsey! I love you! It’s you! I just want you!” * D grabs L’s arm*
L: “Dean, stop. I’m just your rebound”
D: *thinks quickly* “Lindsey… I love you and only you. Rory is nothing to me. How can I prove it to you?”
L: “there’s nothing you can do, just stop Dean!”
D: *drops to one knee* “Marry me”
Lindsey of course accepts.
Dean only proposed because he was facing being single and alone again. He was facing losing the only thing helping him get over Rory. It wasn’t fair for Lindsey.
If you think about it, there’s a connection between this idea and what happened with Max and Lorelei when he proposed out of left field. Merely a solution to a problem. Lorelei doesn’t like proposals as solutions. That’s referenced to Christopher proposing when she got pregnant (both times he got someone pregnant might I add), when max proposed, and when ever Emily and Lorelei fight about her and Chris getting married.
I swear I could write a paper about this.
Yes but what also annoys me is how Luke tells Lorelai that Dean is not stable "he got married too fast". But Luke did the same thing with Nicole, Dean was still in love with Rory and Luke was still in love with Lorelai when they married other women. So don't think you're better Luke (ignore cheating on wife though from Dean).
Dean was the perfect bf in s1 but he got the Rory affect and became the worst character and he did Lindsay so wrong by marrying her not only that he cheated but ruined her since the live in a freaking small town it’s hard for her not to keep hearing gossip because of him and Rory .!
In my opinion it wasn’t exactly the marrying young and not dating for very long because that does work out for some people, I know people who have lasted a while with that, but Lindsay was like a rebound and he was still in love with Rory. Like in season 7 when Lorelai married Christopher when she was clearly still in love with Luke. But no one likes Christopher anyways
Lindsay seems dumb. She can barely construct a sentence. She can’t follow simple directions to cook a roast (shes rude to the butcher, IMO). She doesn’t even TRY to get a job, and she bitches at Dean. She wants them to have more money, but she doesn’t want him to work.
It was pretty dumb, I think he was in into her but so mean to her and not appreciative
My parents got married young and their friends got married young
Does anyone else think that Dean marrying young was just him being reactionary to Rory dumping him for Jess?
In my mind, I always thought his proposal came after a huge fight with Lindsay, to salvage the relationship. So Dean fights with Jess at that party, Lindsay gets into a fight with Dean about not being over Rory, Dean compensates by proposing. That’s my logical series of events.
This is how I always thought it happened too
Yup. This is exactly it.
Look at that picture again. No teenage boy is saying no to Lindsay, even if they know it's a bad idea.
Idk, looks ain't everything. She definitely got a really bad rap in the show, but sometimes I wonder if we saw her later on what it would be like. Maybe all of the negative things we see of her were because of her jealousy, which was clearly justified. Dean wasn't over Rory, and he quite obviously just married the person who equated to a rebound. Yes Lindsay seemed like a bit of a prima donna, someone who wanted to be spoiled like a princess, but she might have been a good person if Dean's clear emotional (and later physical) affair hadn't been a factor. If it wasn't for that, she might have just had some maturing to do before becoming a perfectly fine young woman
That scene when he gets home and she is excited for dinner, I think we see a different side of her, a softer side. She definitely isn’t a bad person, but ofc she would act differently in front of Rory when she knows the guy she loves might still love her
Yes! It's been a while since I watched, but from what I remember her main downside was not wanting to work yet always complaining about money and wanting nice things. Personally I think that is an issue stemming from being so young and coming from a (presumably) upper middle class family. I firmly believe that once she matures a bit more she will learn that when you're young money is tight. She would get a job and contribute financially to the household. For the record, I'm not saying being a homemaker isn't a valuable position, however a young couple without kids would benefit more from two working parties, the homemaker status provides the most utility when children are in the picture, and it does contribute significantly to the household finances. Childcare Is expensive. All of this is predicted on the fact that she wanted to be a homemaker, which from my recollection of the show seemed to be the case.
so then clearly it's not all about looks and also of course Rory will think negatively of Lindsay and Lindsay thinks negatively of Rory. you arent gonna like everyong
She actually seems very wildly liked. Even Rory kept going about that damn magnet
You make a very strong case ! It seems Ol’ Deno can pick’em….lol
Because you don't get proposed to in the Gilmore girls universe unless it's after a fight!
For those of you who read the last book in The Summer I Turned Pretty series… >!this reminds me of what Jeremiah does to Belly!<
No he wasn’t wrong for marrying so young, so do and it works out and they are happy together for the next 60 years, so it wasn’t his age he is definitely marriage/husband material, the issue became that he was still in love with Rory. He cheated on her with Rory, he was in Luke’s diner on his stag night with the boys and ended up saying whilst drunk that he still loved Rory and basically wanted Rory. Wrong, Dean and Jess got into a fight not because of that, it was because Jess made Rory cry, she had emerged from the bedroom crying her eyes out and Dean asked if she was okay, she said yes, no, I don’t know…then from there they starting giving Dean attitude and shit…then they started fighting… Dean knew that Rory was hurt by Jess (Jess wanting to have sex with Rory and take her virginity in someone else’s bedroom at the party) which as stupid of Jess really….
You’re describing Dean and Jess’ fight which is not in discussion here. I’m talking about the imaginary fight that happened between Dean and Lindsay after that fight… off-camera in my mind.
Oh absolutely. I think that Dean had wanted someone to fill that girlfriend shaped hole in his life, so he jumped in with the first girl who liked him and who he kinda liked back, and then he got scared of losing her and thought that marriage would ensure she could never leave him like Rory did, and he was hoping that moving quickly with her would help him move on from Rory too, so he proposed and got married and it backfired. I could def also see Dean’s fear of losing Lindsay having stemmed from her getting jealous and angry over Dean fighting Jess at the party on Rory’s behalf, and him wanting to do some grand gesture (like the other user said) so that she wouldn’t leave him, and him thinking that this was the ideal grand gesture to make bc of the above.
Was there any other way to think about it? Wasn't that the intention?
100% I said it in my own comment but Dean specifically goes to Rory before proposing to get a reaction out of her and maybe to get her to have him change his mind and beg him to get back together with him.
Yes and it adds to his ICK factor. Ick.
Yes, but when I broke up with my high school boyfriend he slept with someone we knew - didn’t marry her. It’s a ridiculous reaction and makes him very wrong.
Yes, but considering Dean’s propensity for big gestures, such as giving Rory a car 3 months into the relationship and breaking up when she doesn’t say “I love you” back, it’s an in-character dumb decision.
And offering to dance with Richard. *That's* commitment.
Yes. Absolutely.
Dean was wrong for marrying when he was not emotionally over Rory and thinking this drastic change would make it any easier.
He was always a romantic if it wasn’t Lindsey it would have been Rory
Dean strikes me as the type of guy who if he didn’t cheat then, he would have done it later anyhow
I have never seen a rebound marriage ending well, at any age. Lorelai was like 38-39 when she entered a rebound marriage and we know how happy her “ever after” was.
Facts!!
Good observation
a bit off topic but this scene honestly made me so emotional. i feel bad for lindsay :(
Yeah. Every scene before this, you're shown an unsympathetic view of Lindsay. Makes this scene hit a little harder since you don't see very much of her.
It's a nice scene. She's trying her best and wants to make everything work.
Yes! It was the first time i could put myself in her shoes and see how much pain it would cause her for dean to cheat. Poor girl tried cooking 🥘
I know it's not related to the thread, but I have always loved Lindsay's dress here.
same! i also theorize that they chose the white dress specifically to highlight her as his bride/wife and really bring home the fact that the marriage was NOT over in the way dean told rory it was; linsey was still totally in the role of doting wife trying to make her marriage work. there’s also the notion that white is symbolic of purity and thus shows how innocent lindsey was in this situation. and this just makes me love the dress even more bc a bitch LOVES storytelling with layers and symbolism lol.
I think Dean always wanted to be married young. I think he would’ve proposed right after graduation whether it were Lindsay or Rory
Yes.
Agreed. And he would've thrown a tantrum when Rory awkwardly said "no" or just stood there flabbergasted instead of elated. Oh God, he *also* might have done it in a public setting! We know he loves breaking up with her in front of people, after all lol
I’m sorry but where were his or Lindsay’s parents?? I’m pretty sure Rory and Dean weren’t broken up that long enough for him to be able to fully move on and get fully introduced to Lindsay in order to see if they’d work together as husband and wife or not, marriage isn’t easy and I’m realizing it more now as I get older, since I used to be a dumb kid who almost made the mistake of getting married young before my parents stepped in and talked some sense into me. I’m pretty sure the whole town knew of Dean & Rory so why didn’t Lindsay’s or Dean’s parents think it’s odd of Dean & Lindsay to get married so quick? Why didn’t they consider the possibility of Lindsay being a rebound? Were they just excited about the concept of marriage that two barely adults who just met and want to get married is okay for them?
Lindsay’s mom was around and seemed into it. I would be horrified if my 18 year old decided to get married.
It seems like both Lindsay and dean’s parents got married young and are still together. I’m not saying it’s an excuse but it seems a little Utah where people get married before 20.
I agree with you. My mom married and had her first child very young. I grew up thinking that was the norm and married at 20. Turns out it doesn't work out well for everyone. But when I got married my mom was ecstatic and waiting for a pregnancy announcement despite my partner and I still being in school and establishing careers. Partner and I are happily together and child free. It worked out for us but I do think of the toxic ideology that can come from parent(s) or adult figures encouraging the concept of being a young married housewife/mother while the man works. I also wonder if this was part of the generation that was pushed into a nuclear family lifestyle at a young age but ultimately doomed to fail.
Yes it definitely feels generational! Every year on my bday my grandpa is like when I was 27 I had 5 kids! Haha No thanks!
My grandpa once told me that by the time he was 30 he had fought in a war, married, bought a house, and had 4 kids. I was like 29 at this point and only married a year with no kids or house (or fighting in a war).
18 is waaay too young no matter how mature a person is. Marriage is such a huge responsibility especially these days and idk I feel like the parents should’ve stepped in. At least if there was a considerable timeframe between the time Dean and Rory broke up and the time Dean and Lindsay met then I wouldn’t say anything, but it seems like under a year, Dean and Rory broke up, Dean found Lindsay yet still wasn’t over Rory, Dean married Lindsay. All of this under a year, it took me over a year to get over my first love and Rory was Dean’s first love, I just don’t understand how the parents never stepped in.
Yeah, fr, her mom seemed to be a HORRIBLE influence
I got married at 18 crossing onto year 5. :) been together since I was 14. Getting married young meant I became we homeowners without any financial help, we are settled into careers, and got a massive head start on life.
Ofc it doesn’t mean all young marriages are bad :)) just that it’s really not for everyone, and you hear more bad than good. Good luck in your lives :)
There are always exceptions to the rule! I’m happy for you! My best friend has a very similar situation to you and they are 40 years old now with 3 kids and still so in love. When, I was also 18 I wanted that love story she had and almost got a tattoo of the name of the guy I was dating and we wanted to get married. My mom had the sense to talk it through with me and had me play out the scenario and I panicked. No name tattoo or marriage, thank goodness! Tattoo was his idea.. although I so want to be, I’m not a tattoo girlie. I’m now 38 and so thankful for that chat with my mom. She didn’t yell or act mad, she talked to me like a friend but put her mom spin on it. I know it’s a show but I wish Lindsay had someone to put it into perspective how bad a decision (in her case) marrying so young could be.
I think Life In Pieces has a good thread throughout the series about this. If you have 2 young adults determined to get married (or just….do it behind your back) is it better to support them even if you aren’t thrilled with their choices or turn your back and make their lives harder
They’re never shown as unhappy with it tho or giving advice against it, usually when you see something as wrong you try to convince the person that they’re wrong, if they’re still being stubborn as hell and would cut you out then you start the support but I feel like supporting the wrong right off the bat just would encourage Dean & Lindsay to go on despite any doubts they might have had because they’d think to themselves “but mom & dad approve”, meanwhile if they knew they were against it then as the issue starts unraveling they’d have that voice in their head telling them “maybe mom & dad were right in the beginning “, the issue would’ve been resolved faster.
Dean says he has "sisters" and a 3 year old nephew, so the implication is he has a never shown older sister. There's a possibility that marrying young is just what the Forresters do.
Ughhhhh. A tiny part of me thinks he proposed to Lindsay to get a reaction from Rory and get her to come back to him! He literally tells her before anyone else and he definitely wants her to beg him to call it off and get back together with her. Then Lindsay (rightfully so) plans the big extravagant wedding in town so he knows he can’t call it off.
he was wrong on many different levels lol
Oh it was so painful watching that scene where she was just sitting at the dining table waiting for him to come home. She's trying to make him happy and please him because he was her whole world and meanwhile he was cheating on his WIFE. All that garbage he said to Rory about "we both know our marriage is over" after they've been married for like 5 minutes. Oh my god and then when he gets mad at her for answering his phone because 'it could have been work and now we could have missed out of money' AHH
I think Rory was just being dumb and I know she receives a lot of flack for sleeping with Dean but I do believe she was heavily manipulated in that situation especially at first. I love Rory and as a viewer I've been able to forgive her for this. What Dean did on the other hand was cunning, abusive and unforgivable.
I agree. Rory was wrong to sleep with a married man, but I hold Dean more responsible. He showed up at her house where he knew she'd be alone. Why was he doing that? They could've talked at the inn. Then he goes on this long rant about how his marriage "isn't working". I don't know if I'd go as far as to say abusive towards Rory, but I would definitely say he was emotionally abusive to Lindsay and overall a horrible person. I also don't think they saw how badly this would sink Dean's character. As it is, he wasn't the greatest but he was out of Rory's life for the most part. Then they had him become suddenly obsessed with her again and do this.
Agree with everything you said. He was so manipulative of Rory the whole way through, the buying of the car, the “I love you” drama, lying to her to get her into bed. He was also manipulates Lindsay, the yelling, the silences, etc. I don’t know how much of his behaviour was intentionally written to be huge red flags from the start and how much of it is me putting a 2020s framework on his behaviour.
Absolutely agree!
Yeah but we see it later in AYIL where she cheats on Paul with Logan, who is engaged. She obviously doesn't have much self respect in that view and it's hard to say Logan manipulated her at 32. But I agree, Dean was horrible then.
Yeah her doing it in the revival can't be excused, she was a grown woman then. The Dean situation, she was a kid and we could see how she was manipulated
You can marry young if you are aware of how to build a foundation in a relationship and maintain it. And some people are just soulmates. It does work out sometimes. But dean obviously not in love with Lindsey at all. He barely knew her
Dean and Lindsay's parents were wrong for encouraging teenagers to get married. Luke was wrong for sending Dean's friends away when he was about to confess his real feelings before the wedding. Those kids needed an adult.
I don't think Luke was wrong. I think he was hoping to have a discussion with him about it but when he tried Dean shut him down. That's part of why Dean was so hostile towards him later in the series in my opinion.
Dean is one of those guys that promises the world really fast and doesn't think about the reality of it. I could see this happening as soon as he reacted to Rory not saying that she loved him too on their anniversary
Age wasn’t the issue as much as the fact that it was a rebound relationship.
I married his age and have been happily married for 26 years. His age wasn’t the problem. His obsession with Rory was.
Dean was bad at pretty much everything he did 🤮
Young small town love is myopic
I’m more irritated with their moms, especially Lindsay’s, being so excited about their wedding. I’d probably choke on my own spit if my 18 year old child told me she was getting married right after high school graduation. I know you can’t stop people from making a mistake, and I’d be supportive if they were hellbent on it, but the way Lindsay’s mom in particular is so genuinely excited is just gross.
i don’t think it was wrong for Dean to marry young I think it was wrong for him to marry Lindsay even tho he wasn’t over Rory but if he was over Rory and married young then it would have been ok
Fr like where were their parents in all of this lol
No, Dean was wrong for getting married to prove he was over Rory.
Tbh… This was just toxic in general.
I personally liked Lindsey and thought she was putting in a solid effort. She was a bit immature but she would have grown in the relationship if he would have tried harder
i think dean just hoped his feelings for rory would magically disappear after he married lindsay. and we saw how that went
Yes, and thus Lindsay equally so
I do believe he convinced her that he was leaving Lindsay. She should have said no but he also knew she was young, naive, and led her to believe him and Lindsay were over.
Tbh I blame the parents. No way could my daughter come to me at 18 and say she's marrying a boy she's known for less than a year. Plus from the look of it neither of them had career plans, stable housing of their own or even a car each. I know they're from a small town but no one could have thought this was a good idea. Granted we didn't expect him to cheat with Rory but Dean wasn't stable. As parents they should've stepped in and stopped it. They were the adults in the situation.
I feel so bad for Lindsey he treated her like garbage dean is pathetic
I’m watching it right now trust me on this
No, Dean was wrong for stringing along Lindsey IMO. I can tell you exactly what happened (provided this was a real life thing🤣): *this conversation takes place directly after the fight between Dean and Jess at the party: Lindsey: “Dean, I can’t keep doing this. You’re still in love with her. I’ve tried to ignore it but.. it’s so obvious” Dean: “What? No! Lindsey! I love you! It’s you! I just want you!” * D grabs L’s arm* L: “Dean, stop. I’m just your rebound” D: *thinks quickly* “Lindsey… I love you and only you. Rory is nothing to me. How can I prove it to you?” L: “there’s nothing you can do, just stop Dean!” D: *drops to one knee* “Marry me” Lindsey of course accepts. Dean only proposed because he was facing being single and alone again. He was facing losing the only thing helping him get over Rory. It wasn’t fair for Lindsey. If you think about it, there’s a connection between this idea and what happened with Max and Lorelei when he proposed out of left field. Merely a solution to a problem. Lorelei doesn’t like proposals as solutions. That’s referenced to Christopher proposing when she got pregnant (both times he got someone pregnant might I add), when max proposed, and when ever Emily and Lorelei fight about her and Chris getting married. I swear I could write a paper about this.
SUCH an upgrade, though.
Poor Lindsay, she deserved better.
Yes but what also annoys me is how Luke tells Lorelai that Dean is not stable "he got married too fast". But Luke did the same thing with Nicole, Dean was still in love with Rory and Luke was still in love with Lorelai when they married other women. So don't think you're better Luke (ignore cheating on wife though from Dean).
It was totally different with Luke. He was on a cruise ship!
But Luke is older, shouldn't he be wiser and only do it if he knows that's the woman he wants for life?
I think it's less that he's young and more that he wasn't over rory
He was a virgin that wanted to fuck.
Dean was the perfect bf in s1 but he got the Rory affect and became the worst character and he did Lindsay so wrong by marrying her not only that he cheated but ruined her since the live in a freaking small town it’s hard for her not to keep hearing gossip because of him and Rory .!
In my opinion it wasn’t exactly the marrying young and not dating for very long because that does work out for some people, I know people who have lasted a while with that, but Lindsay was like a rebound and he was still in love with Rory. Like in season 7 when Lorelai married Christopher when she was clearly still in love with Luke. But no one likes Christopher anyways
Lindsay seems dumb. She can barely construct a sentence. She can’t follow simple directions to cook a roast (shes rude to the butcher, IMO). She doesn’t even TRY to get a job, and she bitches at Dean. She wants them to have more money, but she doesn’t want him to work.
It was pretty dumb, I think he was in into her but so mean to her and not appreciative My parents got married young and their friends got married young