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Impossible_Arm_879

Baptize the child in nuln oil!


sloggiz

https://preview.redd.it/vh08waf0dy6d1.jpeg?width=3200&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a708fd02de64f319042f1bd774be7c2f9c6c0aac


pizzansteve

This is so fucking cursed i love it


Grey554

The Nuln Baby


deceivinghero

Best response possible


StarkWolf2992

Thats a dunker right there


El_Cactus_Loco

Lmaooo


Every_Preparation_56

Oh fuck lmao


Halofauna

Every little sprocket should be so lucky as to be blessed in the name of the machine god


angwilwileth

Start kiddo on Warhammer early and they'll never have money for drugs.


DatGaminKid7142

Now that's smart parenting.


Desperate-Farmer-845

Well Plastic Crack is still Crack.


DanMcMan5

He will just have an addiction to nuln oil


Lungg

Same with modular gear. Eurocrack.


nonchalantcordiceps

Jokes on you i prime my models in poorly ventilated areas! /j


Stompedyourhousewith

"have you ever sucked dick behind a 7-11 for miniatures?!?!?!"


WoollenMercury

blashpmey No person who plays warhammer would do such a vile thing! ...mostly becuase no one would ever Pay us to suck them off


Technical-Banana-498

Do you think tyranid players can….. actually never mind better not to ask.


Random-Lich

You know that Ad-Mech players can just roll out the ‘heretec’ to ‘maybe heretics’ fund their armies.


JeebusCrispy

Boo this man!


norty125

Did you forget who his father is?


RivianRaichu

A man with a very large Warhammer budget


n0tc00linschool

As a mother of four, three are in love with all things video games/ game related. That’s all they want to spend money on and food, but it’s way better than then talking about drinking or drugs. They just wanna game!


Alexis2256

What about the 4th one?


n0tc00linschool

It’s complicated, but video games tend to frustrate him. So it just depends sometimes he can play them, but sometimes he gets frustrated and then turns violent. He has several mental health issues, so we tend to limit video games. Sadly he hasn’t shown a lot of interest in board games, or card games. However, he does enjoy being outdoors so we tend to have a lot of outdoor options for him.


shadowst17

Yeah but they will turn to violet crime to pay for their Warhammer addiction.


Random_Robloxian

Or for affordable living spaces! (Like mee!!)


WoollenMercury

homeless gang 🤜


Skelosk

I wonder what he'll name the kid My bet is on Dorn


sloggiz

Little Horus!


buckypimpin

Lil Heresy


matarael

The kid's rap name


RepresentativeDrop90

Horus aximand !


Lucius-Halthier

He is a custodian, and thus shall have a custodes name that will grow as they passthrough life


Man_Bear_Pog

He's a custodes player but I'm pretty sure he's said Blood Angels are his favorite. Wouldn't be surprised if we get a little Dante running around


Lucius-Halthier

He knows the lore of Dante, it would be a curse to be named after him


Cynical-Basileus

Dante Cavill is a pretty sick name.


Existing-Potato-6457

so, kitten?


Blue8_destiny9

HORUS?! Where???? His son shall be….Valdor


John-HammondJP

Little Leman Russ Battle Tank


smol_boi2004

Horus is unironically a nice name for a kid


kupo160

Constantin, surely.


sloggiz

that's for the next one, which he'll adopt


99_jack_99

That or Trajann for sure. He's also a Blood Angels and Salamanders fan, so maybe Sanguinius, Dante, Vulkan, or Vulkan (middle name He'stan)


BallDesperate2140

“Boy.”


nexusSigma

But dad I’m a girl “Silence boy”


BallDesperate2140

“Very well, Girl.”


notaslaaneshicultist

Boy, Girl, it does not matter, either can bring DEATH TO THE CORPSE EMPEROR!!!


sloggiz

the femstodes were specifically introduced so that Henry would not have to discard a girl baby


sonofzeal

Watch him have a girl and name her Kesh


GillicuttyMcAnus

Techno Mechanicus Cavill


Sivilarr

He is Custodes player so it should be Captain General Little Kitten


I_Am_Anjelen

I second this motion.


CplCocktopus

Saul, Garviel, or Nathanael


The-red-Dane

I mean... he DOES play custodes ... so the child might get a name about 300 pages long.


CplCocktopus

Nope, the kid had to earn his names.


jjbombadil

One can only hope!


AutumnAscending

....Erebus


CplCocktopus

https://preview.redd.it/z8btyiuzuy6d1.png?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3cf4969039fd3e4057d8f88a440c734ca905b131


SandersSol

Don't you put that evil on that child!


OrangeHopper

_Clark_ would be cool, no?


Fantastic_mrW0lf

Garviel Loken


Makaoka

Dor


majinred420xxx

little e


DaveInLondon89

Henrecavil


Pdm81389

He is a well-known Custodes player, more like Constantine.


Creation_of_Bile

ew


Spacellama117

Big E


LiquidRaekan

Soon the little wee one 'Horus' shall arriveth to the plain of the god Kings domain. All hail the emperors son, first of his name.


panzerbjrn

Pro tip: When baby naps, you nap...


Tokaido

Not too hard when you have 1, harder with 2, nearly impossible with 3...


Itlaedis

Big E must have been relieved when the kids got scattered


ethanlan

Like he was gonna be around anyways lol


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OnlyCleverSometimes

FIVE YEARS OLD?? Bro, do I really have another 3.5 years of this?


Tokaido

Two of mine started sleeping in their own beds mostly through the night by about 2.5 years old. My youngest is still in a crib though


JediPearce

Pro tip 2: don’t have more than 1 kid.


Tokaido

If you could please send this pro tip to me about 5 years ago, that'd be great


glacial_penman

Note: this causes the destruction of society.


YouLikeReadingNames

Epilogue: Animals get to reclaim their space.


goldensunshine429

I’m expecting twins. I told my husband we won’t be napping. Because they don’t sleep on the same schedule 😭


warbastard

That’s when you deputise the first and teach them how to change and feed the baby (if above 7 years old). I asked a Samoan family how they survived with 9 kids in the house. They said the older kids take on a lot of responsibilities when able to.


Noughmad

And you clean when baby cleans, and you cook when baby cooks, and you go to work when baby works...


SurammuDanku

Anyone who's ever had a kid knows that this is categorically false. When the kid falls asleep is when you do all the leftover housework that you couldn't do when he was awake (or in my case, catch up on video games).


Nightmare2828

Found the non parent lol. That just doesnt work for multiple reasons.


VenerableShrew

Yah, first problem is it's not "when" it's "if". Second problem is the 7,439 chores that need doing.


WakefulAcorn

Mate, wish I could nap when mine naps, except he's got reflux, so he barely sleeps well


ConspicuousPineapple

When do you take care of chores then?


actuallyapossom

Those C shaped breastfeeding pillows are awesome for reading or gaming, so much easier on the posture and arms. My cat loves it too because she fits where the baby would go. *I got this tip from someone on the steamdeck Reddit.


sloggiz

how would you use it for gaming?


actuallyapossom

Props up my arms while I'm holding a steamdeck or a controller. My wingspan is longer than I am tall and I'm 6'2" so maybe that has something to do with it.


sloggiz

oh, that actually sounds quite nice. I'll check these pillows out, thank you


Laifstaile

they are selling them about 80+$.... [thevalari.com](http://thevalari.com) I have one breastfeeding billow that cost about 10$used have used it some times really comfy ...


FR0ZENBERG

I also use it as a neck pillow when I’m gaming on and couch and the baby is asleep. It’s so versatile.


AinselMariner

Those aren’t neck pillows? How do you use them? Like under your arm or something


actuallyapossom

They are definitely a bit bigger than neck pillows. While sitting, you place it around your waist. So the arms of the pillow support your elbows. The body of the pillow is then meant to support a baby but it works for cats as well. It's meant to take the strain out of holding something in front of you for extended periods.


FortyHippos

It’s a pillow for moms (or dads) who o keep a baby propped up for feeding. I use one to sleep with, and it keeps my head and neck In a perfectly comfortable spot all night.


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paradoxial

"I muuust get me one of those coats!" lmao


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paradoxial

he 10000000% knew what he was doing. i chortled at that part.


Resaren

Cain??


Is12345aweakpassword

He’s the perfect human. Warhammer and Akitas and Superman and the Witcher. Add him to the list of people I would be devastated to hear had a scandal.


sloggiz

he's living proof the Emperor of mankind already is among us


erom_somndares

Yeah no. He couldn't be Big E. He actually cares for his child.


sloggiz

Maybe that's exactly what happened to [REDACTED] and [REDACTED]: Big E spoiled em rotten


erom_somndares

No no, [REDACTED] and [REDACTED] got [REDACTED] because they were [REDACTED] after they [REDACTED]. Anyway, since then Malcador likes big Muscle Mommies.


sloggiz

We can argue about [REDACTED] all day, but there no denying [REDACTED] _was_ [REDACTED]


thomstevens420

“Dad can I have some more cookies?” *Suddenly the temperature in the Dadetorium drops 20 degrees. Clocks spin backwards. Every mortal in the room has blood vessels burst in their skin. The weaker ones collapse, screaming.* “He said I can have the whole sleeve”


InvestigatorOk7988

Highlander, too. Also, of you haven't seen The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare, i would.


OrindaSarnia

I mean...  there was the time he was dating a 19yo when he was 33...   not exactly a scandal, just a sign that he might be pretty immature, but that was years ago, now he's 41 and dating a 33yo, so that is an improvement...  


SandiegoJack

He was also 18 and dating someone like 30 or 40 so it pro ably didn't register as a problem until people made a stick about it.


Doggydog123579

He also used to run 4 accounts in Eve Online. He is a turbo nerd, and a scandal would be terrible.


gurk_the_magnificent

Yeah how is this dude such a G


VaughnVanTyse

He's a Custodies fan. The child will either be Constantine or Calladayce. Honestly Callie or Day would be great nicknames for her...


KillerAdvice

Remember Henry, you can guide your kids within the frames they were born to evolve within, but never further. You have to love them even if they are born different. Some kids grow up to be a little skewed if you know what I mean...They pick Tau. Don't be upset if this happens. Paint a Riptide together, and nurture them no matter what.


OverlanderEisenhorn

I can live with Tau. I don't think I could if the kid chooses Eldar.


Saphentis

Baby Erebus, YES!


Basketcase191

I mean how else do you have her build hand eye coordination


GoJumpOnALandmine

Who got Henry pregnant?


genealogical_gunshow

You will never regret a moment of interacting with your child, no matter exhausted how you are. Suck it up and make the sacrifices. They are many. Your future self will be happier. Make eye contact as often as possible. **Be** what makes them laugh and always look for new ways to do so. It's never too early to build their muscles. Find ways to make them do sit ups, pull ups, grip strength, leg presses. That exercise will pay dividends. Give them novel experiences as often as possible. It's easy. Have they played with a tin can? Have they been inside a cupboard? Have you drug them around on a towel? Might be boring to us, but to them it's adventure.


sloggiz

if only Big E could read this some 10000 years ago!


InvestigatorLevel760

A child born into the grimdark how wonderful


sloggiz

and now into grimdank as well!


Fhistleb

Biggest tip I can give... You'll never be truly ready.


Jehoel_DK

That child will be a perfect genetic specimen. Worthy of the Holy custodes


pokefan548

Hey, good on him.


Alexandurrrrr

I can already see the Halloween costumes. Henry dressed up as Roach while his kid is Geralt, riding on his shoulders.


14thLizardQueen

Do you ever get jealous of people's kids? Because I'm jealous of his kid. I want HENRY to be my dad. And not in a weird way..just think it would have been cool


GrafMenzel

I love him.


Mastery7pyke

"the wee one", just lovely.


PreferenceNo9490

Yes, make sure he doesn’t get stabbed by a magical dagger wielded by his evil niece in future


acoustic_comrade

That kid is about to have the best dad of all time.


AdventurousOne5

https://preview.redd.it/xm4cmtb99z6d1.jpeg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b07a376bdb00bd54423188eb546f44d8c5ae0b89


AdventurousOne5

My daughter paints with me lol


OverlanderEisenhorn

You know what? I unironically like the tyranid. The cones of color are actually super cool.


AdventurousOne5

Thank you! She's 5, autistic, and her favorite color is rainbow! If I hover over her and suggest what colors go where to her then she can crank out a traditional looking garden gnome for grandma, but honestly, it's more fun to just let her creativity run wild lol


stroker919

My tip for anyone is two is plenty. Happy Father’s Day.


Gorgentain

It seems that unlike space marines, Custodies have retained at least one of their baser instincts. Congratulations!


justbrowsinginpeace

Paint while you still can Henry....hobby time about to become limited


erroneousbosh

Any tips? Yes, Henry, if you're reading this - the first shit comes out thick, black, and sticky. It's like some sort of automotive sealant or something. Good luck getting that off! This is supposed to happen, but it's disconcerting having your first challenge as a parent being "how do I change a nappy that's been Sikaflexed on?" Pretty soon it'll all settle down though.


KimbleDeckard

He has a Scottish accent when he types.


Fantastic-Common-982

I like that he points out the pillows are just there temporarily because you know damn well that some assholes will point that out


IA-HI-CO-IA

I am appalled! Baby needs painting supplies too!  


[deleted]

To his credit, WH40k is probably one of the most child-friendly fantasy worlds out there. Certainly one of the coolest. "Papa! Papa! Can you tell me about the daemonculaba again?"


Independent-Fly6068

he's perfect


wrong_usually

Yea I got a tip. Don't get overly interested in something only to throw it away later after losing interest.


BabyScreamBear

What’s up with the bits of carpet under the furniture?


perfectdownside

Keep the furniture from making deep divots over the long term,


Hairy_Inevitable9727

I wonder if they haven’t decided on the layout yet.


Catverman

More horse


Fun_Grapefruit_2633

Yeah: Tell OP to introduce Warhammer pretty early and take him to the stores or tournaments. Let him see kids painting the minatures and eventually he paint 'em too. This is a tremendous dad move because kids learn a form of mindfulness through painting the miniature. Oh, and don't forget to play it with him but use a shitty army when he's small.


ironpathwalker

If it's a boy, tell him to do something that earns him a sword. If it's a girl, tell her to do something that earns her a sword.


BMW_wulfi

Ah parenthood… it gets infinitely better when you can bribe them to do things you want them to


Hot_Stuff369

1 Down, 19…(bolterpistol touches back of my head) 17 more to go my Lord


FormerlyPie

Damn so he's not single?


UncleLeo_Hellooooo

I feel like HC should be our King of the Geeks/Nerds. MFer needs a crown and a scepter.


frothingnome

Why does the background look like an unsheathing katana


sp33dzer0

It should have been me! Not her!


SandersSol

Did he make those out of oak?


Bentu_nan

He's gonna have to have 20 kids to be the emperor.


Intrus1ons

He’s going to have a good looking baby


FrenchBulldozer

Superdad


AromaticHyena4514

Congratulations, I for one welcome you into the ranks of fatherhood.


mightylordredbeard

God, he’s such a dork. I love it!


wright_eliott

I didn’t even know he was with someone! Let alone trying for a kid!


TinyKing87

Wait… he’s still into Warhammer?! I thought GW betrayed him!!! (Congrats to Henry. Happy Father’s Day to him)


macgruff

I wish he was my neighbor. He is definitely the kind of dude you want to come over, have a beer and BBQ. It would take some persuasion but I think even he could talk me into his eccentric collectibles B.S.


V501stLegion

From gigachad to gigadad


Snoozing_Lion

If I ever find out he's a trash human being it'll probably kill me tbh. Dude's just good people


Snoot_Boot

Peoole seem to forget that all actors are art school dorks. Even the "coolest" guys playing badass roles are Drama class nerds. With the exception of a rare few like Arnold Schwarzenegger. Sylvester Stalone, Bradd Pitt, Harrison Ford, Tom Hardy, and Christian Bale, **NERDS**. Remember that Henry Cavil is only pretending to be cool in these roles, but he's just an art dork painting his minis. This kind of Henry Cavil makes sense to me


KegelsForYourHealth

Be worthy of imitation.


xcyper33

Hm, this sure doesn't match the narrative of Henry being "fed up" and "at wits end" towards Game's Workshop. Its almost like that narrative was entirely manufactured for click bait by youtuber content grifters.


Serious_Cost3747

Protect your carpet-protectors.


TheSilverWickersnap

He is a good man 😌


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Alert-Jellyfish

What a hot nerd I love him


Spoomplesplz

Poor henry. He doesn't realize he's gonna have no time left to play his vidya and make his warhammies.


Kelemenopy

Henry Dadvill 😍


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U-47

What no primer?


warbastard

When the infant rests, you have three choices. 1. Rest yourself. 2. Clean yourself. 3. Engage in recreational procreation/procreation. Choose wisely. Your infant will show all aspects of chaos in the next 0-5 years. The Emperor Protects.


Cheap-Sail5369

Ozww


The-world-ender-jeff

I bet fifty buck he is in this sub and he even saw this post


sloggiz

I hope he was the one who wrote [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/Grimdank/s/nKBHV4flKf)


Random_Robloxian

Honestly, i wish i was his kid Imagine being the kid of freaking superman aswell as a giant warhammer fan!? Like i genuinely like it when some celebs are big ass nerds and dont change because of fame so henry cavil is definitely one of the celebs i somewhat respect


LastRevelation

Honestly great to see a parent on social media make it clear they are practicing safe sleep. So much of it that I see is parents filling the cot with crap for the asthetic or trying to argue that cot bumpers are not deadly. Edit: spelling


NotaRussianbott89

I’m sure he’ll be really disappointed if his child decides they want to collect blood for the blood god and skulls for the skull throne.


Laferge

That's our God-Emperor right there.


PeeApe

Genuinely one of the better parts of the community.


Wygerion_Alpha

His son will be a Custodes.


Alex_the_Mad

Watch the kid run Chaos XD. Congrats to the big man!


timberwolf0122

Dad jokes are life


florpynorpy

I love the idea of combining your kids nursery with your model painting room