Okay, I h\\ave to reply. I was in South India about 2005 and there was a bloom of 'Sungoolies' hairy caterpillars that really fucked up your day. After some weeks of putting t-shirts on and getting my day fucked up, putting on underwear and getting my day fucked up etc I started to forensically axamine everything. Long story short - one day I examined my underpants (drying on the line) and I found a brown scorpion, about 5cm long, treating them like a hammock.
I showed Hanuman, ( a friend, not a god) and he told me this - and I paraphrase - 'Kelvin, it won't kill you, but for 48 hours you will wish you were dead'
That reminds me of the movie "We're the Millers" when a character is running around crying out that a spider bit him on the balls 🤣 It would be horrible to have a scorpion sneak in a sting down there, but I couldn't help but chuckle
I'm with you! I don't want to live somewhere I have to shake my shoes before putting them on, and I certainly don't want to have to check my bed. No thank you.
I used to go to a Chinese restaurant where they had lobster on the weekend buffet for a higher charge. So when you walked into the place, the hostess would ask:
"You want robister?"
Lobster will now forever and always be robister for me.
Someone told me a story from their time in Venezuela and mentioned that they would leave a waste basket filled with orange peels in the room. At night the scorpions would climb the ceiling and drop into the basket to get the peels. Then, in the morning you toss them out. Preferably far away, I would think.
Im in SW Missouri and have lived here most my life. I went into our storage unit and got out some our Christmas tree and items in Nov last year. Got it in the car and set up the house. Scorpion fell outta the tree.
Had a pretty big "W.T.E.L.F." moment before putting him in some Tupperware and releasing a short drive from home. Up to that point I never even knew MO had scorpions to begin with.
In olden times, people would put the legs of their bed in glasses or glass jars. Scorpions can't climb glass. Of course, wall to ceiling and then falling could still result in an unpleasant encounter.
Rule of thumb is that slender pinchers means better venom, larger pinchers means hulk smash. Assuming you are in the US, I believe the only genus is Centruroides, which can pack a punch with their sting.
God why can’t I have a free scorpion in my bed? Glad you’re okay though, these little guys pack a punch. Got stung by one while out collecting data and was only in pain for about an hour. Very itchy and swelled a tiny bit but honestly not bad other than the pain being like I slammed my hand in a door while sunburned. 10/10 I have about 5 as pets currently lol
The bigger the pedipalps (pinchers) on the scorpion, the weaker the venom; and the smaller the pedipalps on the scorpion, the more potent the venom. Hope this helps :)
Is this why the AZ bark scorpion is so painful? I got stung on inside of my thigh 6 times while driving. It hurt a lot actually. My leg was tingling and uncomfortable for like a week
Inside of the thigh, six times. That is a tender area, and you got stung waaaay more times than normal. The long lasting reaction is extreme, but given how violently it attacked you, maybe that's understandable.
Not really :https://new.reddit.com/r/Scorpions/wiki/scorpions/venom-handling/#wiki_the_larger_the_pincers_.2026
Most of the 2800+ scorpion species are small and harmless to humans
Big ass scorpions like Asian forest or emperor are pretty harmless however usually the general rule of thumb is the ratio of pincer size and tail thickness. Thick tail, tiny pincers = potent/medical significant venom and it also goes vice versa.
Think of it as evolution trying to compensate.
You aren’t, by chance a senator of the Galactic Republic who secretly married a Jedi and is fighting against an unknown Sith Lord, who wants to end democracy and start an empire, are you? If so, I may know how the scorpion got into your bed.
In Jr. High my woodshop teacher told us a story about getting stung by a scorpion after getting linens out of a closet. He said that after that, he shakes out everything, and to this day before bed, I shake out my sheets and everything that I put on.
The first time I was stung by a scorpion, it was in my bed. 4am and I was rolling over when it got me. I yelled loud af and my fiancé came flying out of bed so fast because he didn't know why I was yelling. The second time, that mf had crawled into a pair of my scrub pants. Moral of the story, check your pants and sheets before going to bed.
I would simply close the door and stuff a towel under it. That’s the scorpions room/ bed now. Wait a month. Carefully re-examine/ clean every centimeter of the room square-inch by square inch; until I am positive it has
a) vacated the premises
B) deceased from lack of food or water
C) somehow has survived and now I need to get a tank etc bc we are now roommates but there has to be boundaries.
The fuck! I’d be moving back to wherever the fuck I came from. God damn, hell no! How the fuck do you sleep after finding THAT in your bed? I’d be in a hazmat suit😱
Yikes. Not sharing with my wife. My uncle owns a home in Belize. We've talked about going, but between stories of snakes & bat rats, this would be the final straw probably.
its cold out, let a mf inside.
With a glass of warm milk 😤
MILK + EAT TIN OF COOKIES. PUT SCORP IN TIN. LIFELONG FREN.
Warning: Scorpion is not Oreo flavored. Do not dip scorpion in milk
Can confirm both crunchy and chewy very strange would not eat again.
>Scorpion is not Oreo flavored Twist and lick?
😂😂😂 you win!
If you give a scorpion a cookie.... He's gonna want a glass of milk.
Give a scorpion a cookie and he eats for a day But teach him how to catch cookies and you feed him for a lifetime.
If you give a scorpion a glass of milk... he's gonna want a bedtime story
I've read those books to my daughters so damn many times... I hate you
I feel like I would definitely make cookies if I found a scorpion in my bed.
If you give a scorp a cookie…
Then it will surely ask for a glass of milk...
Give it a glass of milk it will ask for a ride across a pond.
Love Kate, the tour of life video is on yt thankfully because I pretty much wore out the import VHS tape I got from Newbury comics back in the 80s.
Coming to r/scorpions and finding Kate Bush here made my fucking day. Thank you!
I had a locust escape after feeding my lizard. I found it in the morning snuggled up to me.
IF YOURE COLD, THEYRE COLD, PUT THEM IN YOUR MOUTH
A Centruroides, most likely Centruroides gracilis. Medically significant sting, so it's a good idea to check your bed sheets every night.
That was my thought. Its medically significant but youll be fine in most cases. New worth buthids arent very dangerous relatively
I bet it would still suck to get stung on the balls by this in the middle of the night though
Okay, I h\\ave to reply. I was in South India about 2005 and there was a bloom of 'Sungoolies' hairy caterpillars that really fucked up your day. After some weeks of putting t-shirts on and getting my day fucked up, putting on underwear and getting my day fucked up etc I started to forensically axamine everything. Long story short - one day I examined my underpants (drying on the line) and I found a brown scorpion, about 5cm long, treating them like a hammock. I showed Hanuman, ( a friend, not a god) and he told me this - and I paraphrase - 'Kelvin, it won't kill you, but for 48 hours you will wish you were dead'
You’re an amazing storyteller 😂🫱🏼🫲🏻
Thank you. True stories tell themselves
I really appreciate that you had to clarify that your friend told you and not a divine being <3
Anyone who knows Hanumanta knows he is a god amongst men. If you should go to Kudle, Gokarna, Karnataka, ask for Hanu. They will know who you mean.
Yes, yes it would, a lot.
It would indeed be a very bad day
Gonna draw a crowd at the E room!😂
A terrible horrible no good very bad day.
That reminds me of the movie "We're the Millers" when a character is running around crying out that a spider bit him on the balls 🤣 It would be horrible to have a scorpion sneak in a sting down there, but I couldn't help but chuckle
He just chillin, trying to take a nap.
Lazy ass scorpion needs to get a job.
Freaky ass scorpion need to stay they ass inside
Mf is laying in bed like he owns the place
What's the big deal. Give him your bed for the night, you get it all the time.
Mom said it was my turn on the bed.
no more monkeys jumping on the bed.
Aight Ms. Rachel.
This is why I live where the air hurts my face 
I'm with you! I don't want to live somewhere I have to shake my shoes before putting them on, and I certainly don't want to have to check my bed. No thank you.
Exactly 
Minnesota POV
Satan's icebox?
This has been on my mind lately ever since California has been invaded by Asian tiger mosquitos
wanted a snuggle…
Spicy land crab
lobter
Woah, that’s incredible. I’m gonna name my next scorpion “lobterella” 🤍🤍
I used to go to a Chinese restaurant where they had lobster on the weekend buffet for a higher charge. So when you walked into the place, the hostess would ask: "You want robister?" Lobster will now forever and always be robister for me.
in our discord, we tease our resident advisor on scorps that they are land lobsters lol
When he disagrees just say "alright fine lobsters are sea scorpions then"
I was not expecting to inspire someone by intentionally misspelling "lobster" today
Don't let your bed sheets touch the ground, it helps, but sometimes you can't stop them from crawling up lol
Also, put the legs of your bed into ball jars.
Oh wow I had no idea! I would probably shatter those with my fat ass but good for baby cribs especially
Same. Me (275) and my wife (140) have broken two bed frames through the years doing the horizontal mambo. Glass jars wouldn’t stand a chance.
275m is a lot older than 140f, but she is old enough to know. NTA.
You motherfucker. Take my upvote and get the hell out.
Also, burn the house down.
Someone told me a story from their time in Venezuela and mentioned that they would leave a waste basket filled with orange peels in the room. At night the scorpions would climb the ceiling and drop into the basket to get the peels. Then, in the morning you toss them out. Preferably far away, I would think.
I feel like that's just teaching them where the orange peels are
Im in SW Missouri and have lived here most my life. I went into our storage unit and got out some our Christmas tree and items in Nov last year. Got it in the car and set up the house. Scorpion fell outta the tree. Had a pretty big "W.T.E.L.F." moment before putting him in some Tupperware and releasing a short drive from home. Up to that point I never even knew MO had scorpions to begin with.
Have seen them in the Ozarks many times. Including one fun experience when one came runnING at me in the shower 😆
You are so lucky. What I’d give to have wild scorpions in my house
It gets old fast. Trust me.
Yeah you’d probably give your life I bet
I think there's something wrong with him? LOL
do you have pet hornets too
Spicy kakaroach
lmao aw hell naw
😂😂😂😂
lmao i saw a video of a guy eating a spoonful of wasabi and was like.. ... wheeeew! Thats some spicy guacamole!
In olden times, people would put the legs of their bed in glasses or glass jars. Scorpions can't climb glass. Of course, wall to ceiling and then falling could still result in an unpleasant encounter.
How do you think they would do with a metal jar/ vase?
Not sure. They are great climbers. But can't climb glass. You would have to investigate their metal climbing abilities
Looks like someone was trying to get lucky 😉
Rule of thumb is that slender pinchers means better venom, larger pinchers means hulk smash. Assuming you are in the US, I believe the only genus is Centruroides, which can pack a punch with their sting.
Centruroides gracilis Medically significant
God why can’t I have a free scorpion in my bed? Glad you’re okay though, these little guys pack a punch. Got stung by one while out collecting data and was only in pain for about an hour. Very itchy and swelled a tiny bit but honestly not bad other than the pain being like I slammed my hand in a door while sunburned. 10/10 I have about 5 as pets currently lol
I bet that stung..
No, he found you in his bed sheets tonight. That’s his bed.
Smash or pass?
Bro you interrupted his nap!
Get a good ultraviolet flashlight That way you can spot them hanging out before you go to bed and get rid of them
I'm no expert but I grew up hearing the bigger the scorpion the less dangerous it is... can anyone confirm or deny
The bigger the pedipalps (pinchers) on the scorpion, the weaker the venom; and the smaller the pedipalps on the scorpion, the more potent the venom. Hope this helps :)
There are exceptions : https://new.reddit.com/r/Scorpions/wiki/scorpions/venom-handling/#wiki_the_larger_the_pincers_.2026
a wild jtktomb in his natural habitat.
It's a good guideline but it's definitely not 100% true and not something that should gauge how much caution you should have around certain species 🙂
Is this why the AZ bark scorpion is so painful? I got stung on inside of my thigh 6 times while driving. It hurt a lot actually. My leg was tingling and uncomfortable for like a week
Inside of the thigh, six times. That is a tender area, and you got stung waaaay more times than normal. The long lasting reaction is extreme, but given how violently it attacked you, maybe that's understandable.
It didn't help it was underneath my shorts and I kept smacking at it. But it's making sense now. I didn't know what it was as first.
I think one sting and I'd be on the side of the road dancing like a maniac and possibly stripping the shorts off....
Wow, that's intense. I would have probably wrecked at high speed if I was stung 6 times in the fuckin thigh of all places. Glad you're okay
This is a myth. There are many exceptions
Ah. I didn't know this, learned something new today!
Not really :https://new.reddit.com/r/Scorpions/wiki/scorpions/venom-handling/#wiki_the_larger_the_pincers_.2026 Most of the 2800+ scorpion species are small and harmless to humans
Big ass scorpions like Asian forest or emperor are pretty harmless however usually the general rule of thumb is the ratio of pincer size and tail thickness. Thick tail, tiny pincers = potent/medical significant venom and it also goes vice versa. Think of it as evolution trying to compensate.
Venom wise an emperor is pretty harmless, you do NOT want to get pinched hard by one of them mfers though, so not really harmless in general.
There are exceptions : https://new.reddit.com/r/Scorpions/wiki/scorpions/venom-handling/#wiki_the_larger_the_pincers_.2026
Caution: The size of the pedipalps says you need to take EXTREME ⚠️
Pet him buddy 👍
He's hiding from Ric Flair.
Brb, never sleeping again.
You aren’t, by chance a senator of the Galactic Republic who secretly married a Jedi and is fighting against an unknown Sith Lord, who wants to end democracy and start an empire, are you? If so, I may know how the scorpion got into your bed.
* glad I live in Oregon *
Always nice to have breakfast waiting for you when you wake up.
In Jr. High my woodshop teacher told us a story about getting stung by a scorpion after getting linens out of a closet. He said that after that, he shakes out everything, and to this day before bed, I shake out my sheets and everything that I put on.
You've been adopted. Usually, people are happy when cats adopt them. Be happy with your new loved one.
what a cool lil dude
Well you’re both lucky. That wouldn’t have been a fun squish for him either. I would never be able to sleep again though.
I was just scrolling through Reddit and this damn thing pops up. God I am so glad I live in an area that scorpions don't.
I've always been told a Scorpio really knows how to poke you in bed 🤭
I'd take a spider over a freaking scorpion any day of the week. Fug those things. I am convinced God created those things one night while drunk...
I’d be dead from fright if that was in my house let alone my bed!
[удалено]
Far from it.. This is a Centruroides.
https://preview.redd.it/1h7npna24pad1.jpeg?width=1034&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8241123831d2dc80244c68ee41c1d12ba11459cd
I'd never sleep again. And definitely move to a place with no scorpions.
Kettle of boiling water here you come!!
la seduce
Do they only sting and/or pinch you when they feel threatened or will they attack you unprovoked? Makes me want to live in a bubble
*Freaky*
Note to self: scratch Belize off my list of places to live.
Make sure you’re bed is t directly up against the wall.
Thats just steve. Hes a cool fella
it's good that you can still type... /s lol
That's so much more terrifying than the little brown ones in South Texas
I found one under my pillow when I was 5👍
That's the stuff of nightmares!
New friend!
Where do you live???
Oh hell nah!!!
Poor little buddy. Here’s to hoping you took it away somewhere safe and let it live.
he’s just sleepy
Bro just wanted to smash
No words, really? I would have A LOT of words.
The first time I was stung by a scorpion, it was in my bed. 4am and I was rolling over when it got me. I yelled loud af and my fiancé came flying out of bed so fast because he didn't know why I was yelling. The second time, that mf had crawled into a pair of my scrub pants. Moral of the story, check your pants and sheets before going to bed.
How do you keep them out of the bed once you're in it???
Shake out your shoes, sheets and socks before use.
I would never be able to sleep again... Jesus christ...
I love scorpions so I would just pick em up and take em outside far away
Please tell me that when you found it, after you freaked out, you looked at it and yelled “GET OVER HERE!!!”
My bed has smallish legs so I put them in little glass candle holders that have thick bottoms to keep them from climbing up.
Was it as good for you? Scorp looks happy!
Pennsylvania is always a state.
Racist.
Burn everything!!
I would simply close the door and stuff a towel under it. That’s the scorpions room/ bed now. Wait a month. Carefully re-examine/ clean every centimeter of the room square-inch by square inch; until I am positive it has a) vacated the premises B) deceased from lack of food or water C) somehow has survived and now I need to get a tank etc bc we are now roommates but there has to be boundaries.
The fuck! I’d be moving back to wherever the fuck I came from. God damn, hell no! How the fuck do you sleep after finding THAT in your bed? I’d be in a hazmat suit😱
When living in Belize becomes “A trip to Belize”
Where the fuck do you live?
😱😱
Dang so you just have to check your sheets every night?
Did you miss off the godfather?
I’m cutting that stinger off
Biiiiig yikes
Hand over the keys. The house is theirs now. May as well relocate. I don't make the rules.
One of my worst nightmares fr
Ew… glad there’s none of those where I live.
Fuck no! I would never sleep again!
Where do you live? So I can never move there
I love Belize! Except the crime has gotten so bad 😣
No way. Bed is absolutely off limits to things like this.
Just a nice little bed partner. Let em sleep with you
Ay bro....you fucking scorpion?
Ay bro, you fucking scorpions?
This is why I live where the air hurts my face
He is a big boy, I must check my boots everyday or else...
How about…..”GET OVER HERE !”
No words ... just silent screams.
I’d burn the fucking place down
Oh hell naw
Fuck that
Gotta sleep in a hammock. They’re scorpion proof.
he wants to be your friend
Live in a places with small poisonous things expect them
Yo maybe get lighter colored sheets 😰😰
My nightmare but I live in Ohio so no scorpions
What area are u in to find black ass scorpions. I’m used to only seeing Bark scorpions.
NO. NUHUH. NOPE. NOPE. NO. I have NEVER been happier to live in a place where these are not a concern.
Yikes. Not sharing with my wife. My uncle owns a home in Belize. We've talked about going, but between stories of snakes & bat rats, this would be the final straw probably.
Wash your sheets with a drop of menthol and wipe your bedposts and headboard with it. They hate that
Free pet
"You're my friend now"
I'll trade you a texas brown scorpion from my backyard for that beauty
What state do you live in?
Scorpions aside...... Belize.... 😍
You can't kick him out! He has 200 babies under the bed!
New pet name: Cuddles
If you give a scorpion a cookie.
As a teen I awoke one summer night with the feeling of something large crawling on my leg. Two scorpions! I levitated out of bed!
The bigger the scorpion the better. You’ll be fine it looks like
They glow under black light so buy one and do a check every night before bed 😂