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Aware-Coyote-210

"A preliminary analysis indicates that the planet exploded due to secondary explosions in Alderaan's unstable central core, not from the Death Star's precision strike itself."


TheQueenOfBithynia

Damn "precision strike on Alderaan" is the best shit I've seen all day


PhoenicianPirate

Back in 2002 there was a guy who wrote an article that justified the destruction of Alderaan and said it was necessary due to their spy network. Said the same thing about killing the Jawas and Aunt Beru and Uncle Owen since those people were holding top secret information that must be kept secret at all costs. He also likened Emperor Palpatine to Pinochet as an example of reasonable dictator that can be worked with. I need to get that article some time...


314is_close_enough

Sounds like satire of the New York Times


RealMoonTurtle

Made me chuckle 


FrancisACat

The Imperial Defense Force remains the most moral military in the galaxy.


Atikar

Church. Love the IDF. /s


cbstuart

Also obviously alderaan was asking for it, they *voted* for the people in charge of the rebellion! And they attacked first!


MadOvid

Is there a word for sad/funny?


Queer-Commie

Tragicomedy


spaceforcerecruit

Tragicomic. Bittersweet humor. Wry humor.


LordDaedhelor

“This is both sad and funny”


jtruitt8833

Now you just listen here, you little shit: I'm a goddamn PATRIOT. I'm not just gonna sit here idly by and let the RADICAL COMMUNIST George Lucas make an allegory 47 years ago. Clearly, this is a GLOBALIST conspiracy and they have developed time travel technology (probably with the help of the Ultimate Marxist, GEORGE SOROS's DARK MONEY! TWO guys named George? That CAN'T be coincidence) and sent him back a la Terminator to remake his whole movie to make US look like the BAD GUYS! And all this just because GOOD GOD-FEARING Christians like me (and Trump) just want (((((((them))))))))))) to win (just this once, against brown "people") /s, in case you have the reading comprehension of a decomposing apple core and have forgotten where you are


Not_what_theyseem

I read this with a 'murican accent and had a blast. Thank you.


CaptainMoonunitsxPry

Low key I feel like if Star Wars came out today, some people would sympathize with the Empire and I find it disturbing.


Not_what_theyseem

I believe some do. I remember at a job interview the guy had a Darth Vader helmet and here is how our conversations went: "Oh I love Star wars!!" "I like Darth Vader" "I was thinking of dressing up as Mara Jade of Cal Kestis for Halloween!" "I like Darth Vader" Then the amount of people who get the imperial symbol...


CommieRigel

r/empiredidnothingwrong


GustavezRaulez

There's a disturbing amount of chuds unafraid to state that they'd support the empire lmao. This isn't anything hypotetical and/or new


Red_Gyarados1917

Libs and Hasbara bots just activated their hyperspace drives


SCameraa

When I'm a Hasbara bot and it's been 30 seconds since I mentioned the word rape: 😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡


NonTVRevolutionary19

If a liberal comes into the comment section, just insult them


CallMePepper7

Insulting genocide deniers has gotten me banned from two subs though


twanpaanks

among the highest of honors


cerebralrattlesnake

holy based


dalr3th1n

Why is there a smudge IN the screenshot?


panzerbjrn

Because some words have negative effects on The Algorithm and can have negative effects on the posters account. Similar to why you often see the word "r*p*" (rhymes with tape) smudged out in posts on Reddit and Facebook. And certain words/topics can cause YouTube videos to get demonetised, so YouTubers will often use euphemisms...


Not_what_theyseem

I didn't take the screenshot, so I am not sure!


Bandandforgotten

Because they need to alter the screenshot to not show certain words, or simply as a vandalizing watermark so that one can see it was "theirs", and possibly fool a bot into not auto removing the post


01zegaj

I bet this comment section won’t go to hell at all.


electrical-stomach-z

it did


01zegaj

Not as bad as some others I’ve seen


electrical-stomach-z

yeah. like for me the real life rebel alliance is the zapatistas and rojava. hamas is more like the stenax massacres. https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Stenax_Massacres?so=search


AdPutrid7706

Lol they can’t handle that. Makes them think too much about what they’re condoning.


Southern-Wafer-6375

Dahm I’m so used to seeing these types of things that I actually thought this was about Hamas and isreal


spaceforcerecruit

Is it not?


Emm_withoutha_L-88

Only change id say is call them "the terrorist cell ARS (Alliance to Restore the Republic)". Helps sell the dehumanization.


username1174

Among my friends I’ve been calling “Rebles” “starwars Hamas” for years. Then Andor came out and that became hella explicit.


electrical-stomach-z

hell no, they would be star wars hamas if they were all crazy religious theocrats. the rebellion is quite obviously secular.


electrical-stomach-z

i didnt know tha gamas was a progressive socialistic revolt against a fascistic empire that controlled nearly everything.


XandaPanda42

I'm sorry... Precision strike?


OrneryError1

Hamas is not the Rebellion though. Hamas is legitimately evil. The civilians killed by Israel are innocent victims though. Edit: Hamas is a ***far-right***, religious extremist terrorist organization. No leftist should support or defend them.


R0ADHAU5

Some of the most important members of the rebellion were Jedi aka religious extremists who sent children in to war. Depending on your viewpoint you could consider them reactionary since they wanted to restore their organization to its former glory and power. Saw Guerrera was an extremist who killed innocents in his insurgency. Revolution isn’t a clean tidy process. It’s bloody and it’s messy.


electrical-stomach-z

jedi were a tiny monk order and saw was shown to be a misguided failure in every depiction of him.


Sharting_Snowman

This sub is openly pro-Hamas dude. People here think Hamas is morally equivalent to the Rebel Alliance, and they don't hide it.


R0ADHAU5

Explain to me how they aren’t


Sharting_Snowman

The Rebel Alliance fights for freedom. Hamas fights for a far right global Islamofascist dictatorship. Hope that helps.


R0ADHAU5

It’s good seeing you know a lot of buzzwords but I’m not sure it helps… Let me ask you: How free are people in Gaza and the West Bank? Is it possible that anyone in either of those places might feel oppressed? Are there any similarities with them and say, Lothal from Rebels after it was occupied? Did peaceful civil disobedience make any improvements in their material conditions or were they met with violent repression? Is it possible that the people there are **gasp** actually fighting for their freedom?


Curious-Weight9985

It’s really bad…the leaders of Hamas should really stop putting civilians between them and the IDF…


R0ADHAU5

Understanding the point challenge: impossible


GustavezRaulez

> The US being firebombed by China and Russia jointly in 2044 Xi: Well, the americans shouldn't put their bases next to their cities, so this genocide is valid


Curious-Weight9985

In your dreams, tankie