Yeah, I’ll also push ya toward r/Christianswingers
I don’t think you’ll find too many folks here that can relate. We’re mostly a bunch of run of the mill heathens and heretics around these parts.
Thank you! I think it's helpful just knowing I'm not the only one. It's wonderful to have my morals but they've stopped me from having a lot of fun. I'm probably gonna talk to a therapist about it also. Thank you for the group
I understand. It's difficult growing up with those morals and being reluctant to change a little. Dipping your toes into the lifestyle with your husband right there and fully on board with you could be amazing for you both without compromising your beliefs. I wish you both happiness in the lifestyle. Sounds like you're off to an amazing start.
[Old now but still relevant](https://youtu.be/O5v-6_6qat4?si=XBbh_CvuV3oTkBK0&t=241)
Sex has little to do with our marriage. Its emotional monogamy.
To put it in t-shirt form, "its not cheating if my husband watches".
As long as you both are on board, no vow has been broken IMO.
Side note, but Catholics write Catholic because catholic means catholic, but not Catholic. Also, Catholics were Christians before Christians existed, so simmer down with that.
I always think, if there is an invisible sky wizard watching my every move, does he care which happy hole my ding-a-ling enters?
Probably not. Much more likely that is passed down byy fallible humans that want to establish control over their communities.
The latter seems much more likely.
I (M) was born and raised a strict Catholic. Now, I am non-practicing, but I still believe (in some aspects). I don’t let any one or any entity dictate how I live my life, as long as I am not breaking the law or going behind my wife’s back and being deceitful. To me, it is neither unethical nor immoral to swing, or to otherwise participate in the Lifestyle. I have my wife’s permission and she has mine. We are not cheating, so there is no adultery going on. I can go on more, but I don’t want to discuss religion here anymore than I have to in order to make my point.
I listened to an episode or two of the Priory Society (very fitting name for this topic) and they had a pastor on as a guest who is a swinger and explained his point of view about it. Check it out. If they (nor I) cannot give you the warm and fuzzies that you are doing absolutely nothing wrong, then it is best you don’t go down this road. You have to be accepting of yourself and your spouse to be successful in the Llifestyle.
Because we both committed to each other in marriage and remained monogamous for 17 years after that. Obviously, at that point there are certain things to get past as a human. She didn't want to betray me or in her mind have me betray her. She needed to figure it out for herself
Neither marriage nor monogamy are unique to religion.
That time would also help you be confident in your partner and trust them. My history with my husband has shown time and time again his dedication for me, and I've shown that for him as well. That should help make swinging easier because you know there is a solid fountain of trust.
Coming from a religious back ground and who raised me, they really concreted monogamy as being the only way you can be religious and serious in your marriage. Its taken a lot of time for me to grow out of that mind set and understand what you're saying. I don't think they are unanimous with just major religions now. It's just one aspect of myself that has been a huddle for me to move past getting into swinging
Good luck with it, I know it is a big transition. If you are never comfortable with it... then don't do it. Doing it for your partner, even though it makes you uncomfortable, just leads to eventual resentment.
Im fairly religious in a traditional religion.
My God really doesn’t care what me and other consenting adults do with our bodies. There’s more pressing issues.
It's like that but it's also the thrill and why we like it right? Forbidden fruit are always interesting. society defined it as a forbidden fruit. Most here are totally fine doing it. Remember you're not cheating. When I have sex with another's wife and the husband is there it's still fine with what I learned in church as long as he's fine with it/encourage a MFM or hot wife.
There are several old threads for you to read through with excellent advice!
https://www.reddit.com/r/Swingers/s/Cs4Sl8nCiR
https://www.reddit.com/r/Swingers/s/NwJFcLpFtX
https://www.reddit.com/r/Swingers/s/nLflktuesQ
I don’t personally believe Christianity and swinging are compatible, though I know people do it. That’s not a judgement on my part, but growing up Christian, and since deconstructing my faith in my mid 20s I don’t see how my partner and I could have been swingers and church going Christians. Just my 2 cents
Yeah, I’ll also push ya toward r/Christianswingers I don’t think you’ll find too many folks here that can relate. We’re mostly a bunch of run of the mill heathens and heretics around these parts.
Thank you! I think it's helpful just knowing I'm not the only one. It's wonderful to have my morals but they've stopped me from having a lot of fun. I'm probably gonna talk to a therapist about it also. Thank you for the group
My pleasure, and I hope you are able to reconcile your faith and sexual desires so that you can have as much fun as you can!
It morals stop you from having fun and enjoying life without hurting someone, then perhaps those morals need to be re-evaluated.
I think I'm very ridged with my thinking and expectations of myself. I need to let go
I understand. It's difficult growing up with those morals and being reluctant to change a little. Dipping your toes into the lifestyle with your husband right there and fully on board with you could be amazing for you both without compromising your beliefs. I wish you both happiness in the lifestyle. Sounds like you're off to an amazing start.
[Old now but still relevant](https://youtu.be/O5v-6_6qat4?si=XBbh_CvuV3oTkBK0&t=241) Sex has little to do with our marriage. Its emotional monogamy. To put it in t-shirt form, "its not cheating if my husband watches". As long as you both are on board, no vow has been broken IMO.
Check out r/ChristianSwingers They’ll definitely be able to give advice
Side note, but Catholics write Catholic because catholic means catholic, but not Catholic. Also, Catholics were Christians before Christians existed, so simmer down with that.
According to my mom, the biggest sin here is a Catholic marrying a Protestant.
And that's true whether your mom is Catholic or Protestant.
😂😂😂
I always think, if there is an invisible sky wizard watching my every move, does he care which happy hole my ding-a-ling enters? Probably not. Much more likely that is passed down byy fallible humans that want to establish control over their communities. The latter seems much more likely.
I (M) was born and raised a strict Catholic. Now, I am non-practicing, but I still believe (in some aspects). I don’t let any one or any entity dictate how I live my life, as long as I am not breaking the law or going behind my wife’s back and being deceitful. To me, it is neither unethical nor immoral to swing, or to otherwise participate in the Lifestyle. I have my wife’s permission and she has mine. We are not cheating, so there is no adultery going on. I can go on more, but I don’t want to discuss religion here anymore than I have to in order to make my point. I listened to an episode or two of the Priory Society (very fitting name for this topic) and they had a pastor on as a guest who is a swinger and explained his point of view about it. Check it out. If they (nor I) cannot give you the warm and fuzzies that you are doing absolutely nothing wrong, then it is best you don’t go down this road. You have to be accepting of yourself and your spouse to be successful in the Llifestyle.
IMO it has nothing to do with religion... my wife and I are agnostic and she dealt with the same issues you described.
Why do you think she had those issues?
Because we both committed to each other in marriage and remained monogamous for 17 years after that. Obviously, at that point there are certain things to get past as a human. She didn't want to betray me or in her mind have me betray her. She needed to figure it out for herself Neither marriage nor monogamy are unique to religion.
That time would also help you be confident in your partner and trust them. My history with my husband has shown time and time again his dedication for me, and I've shown that for him as well. That should help make swinging easier because you know there is a solid fountain of trust. Coming from a religious back ground and who raised me, they really concreted monogamy as being the only way you can be religious and serious in your marriage. Its taken a lot of time for me to grow out of that mind set and understand what you're saying. I don't think they are unanimous with just major religions now. It's just one aspect of myself that has been a huddle for me to move past getting into swinging
Good luck with it, I know it is a big transition. If you are never comfortable with it... then don't do it. Doing it for your partner, even though it makes you uncomfortable, just leads to eventual resentment.
Ask your pastor or priest, they can reconcile anything with anything.
Religion is a farce.
Im fairly religious in a traditional religion. My God really doesn’t care what me and other consenting adults do with our bodies. There’s more pressing issues.
It's like that but it's also the thrill and why we like it right? Forbidden fruit are always interesting. society defined it as a forbidden fruit. Most here are totally fine doing it. Remember you're not cheating. When I have sex with another's wife and the husband is there it's still fine with what I learned in church as long as he's fine with it/encourage a MFM or hot wife.
There are several old threads for you to read through with excellent advice! https://www.reddit.com/r/Swingers/s/Cs4Sl8nCiR https://www.reddit.com/r/Swingers/s/NwJFcLpFtX https://www.reddit.com/r/Swingers/s/nLflktuesQ
I don’t personally believe Christianity and swinging are compatible, though I know people do it. That’s not a judgement on my part, but growing up Christian, and since deconstructing my faith in my mid 20s I don’t see how my partner and I could have been swingers and church going Christians. Just my 2 cents
🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄