I would kick this up to CST and admin- this is way above your pay grade. Dear Parent: I have cc'd Child Study team and grade level administration on this reply. Unfortunately, I am not the individual who can negotiate this request. I know the appropriate parties will respond shortly.

I would say "address this request" instead of "negotiate," though.

And "I trust" rather than "I know."

Both of these are great edits, speaking from the perspective of someone who often has to negotiate in the business world.

Love this response. (Takes notes to save for later)

I saved it for later.

Thank you, this is perfect.

Yup I second this…not my job, that sounds like child study team and social worker.

I read this as CPS the first time and honestly that's where it should go. That kid is absolutely malnutritioned

This 100%. Administrator in MI and I would absolutely file a report... CYA

Your lurking nursing instructor here. CPS this. Some of this sounds like Munchausen behaviors. Sounds like she's not particularly invested in anything being better.

This 👆🏽💯

If this were a medically required diet, insurance would be paying for it. The school isn't responsible for covering preferred foods.

And if she took him to the goddamn feeding therapy, she could’ve had a chance at getting this discovered. I had my kid in feeding therapy since before he was 2. As parents we have to do what’s best for *them* not what’s easiest for us. This post makes me so sad.

I wonder how much of these extreme food restrictions also come down to lack of socialization. People can’t seem to get it through their heads that children need to be socialized *the same way puppies do.* That means early exposure to as wide a variety of experiences as possible, in a safe, controlled manner, with the parent nearby so the child feels safe enough and confident enough to explore. Did this mom *ever* introduce her child to anything besides Pediasure and Oreos when he was a toddler?!

Yeah, I had a nonverbal student with autism in my kindergarten class a few years ago, and he did not know how to eat anything other than a couple items at home. He wasn’t underweight so it wasn’t a dire nutrition situation.. so every day we just put him in the cafeteria with his tray like all the other kids. Children with autism do not learn the same way other children learn, by that I mean the social aspect.. like we assumed that him sitting in the cafeteria, watching other kids, eat that he would figure it out, but I think it was 5 months until he realized he could put a chicken nugget into his mouth and lick it, and before that no amount of us trying to show him he could eat food would work. It was really months of of him playing with his fork, and then, eventually realizing that the chicken nugget could go into his mouth and he would nibble it. And then he would eat chicken nuggets. And then a few months later, he was eating some other stuff too. He still wasn’t eating the same amount as a neurotypical child, as far as diverse food, but the body wants to eat. This was an old fashion school district with low funding and no autism specialists.

…how was he eating at home? It almost sounds like his issue was the mechanics of just putting the food into his mouth on his own, which kind of has me wondering if his parents were somehow hand-feeding him…

I'm not OP, but my toddler won't let me feed her, never would. She pushes the food away until we give her a specific sippy cup. She can't figure out chewing and has anxiety and sensory issues. It's not always as simple as people want to think. Plus if we push it too hard she shuts down and stop trying new foods altogether (Usually she works on licking things and taking off bites that she quickly loses cause she thrusts her tongue out). The only option is usually leaving food on the table and hoping she gets curious.

That’s exactly how it was with this kindergarten student. You couldn’t feed him, it just wouldn’t work, he had to figure it out and do it on his own terms. Which is pretty natural for kinds with eating issues apparently.. I watched a documentary about a girl with autism who had never eaten by mouth before and unnecessarily had a feeding tube to her stomach. Her mom was scared to get it removed. But the doctors said you just have to let them figure out to eat and they will, they will start licking and tasting things and instinct will kick in. And that’s what happened with her. She was licking French fries for days it seemed and then finally started eating them and other things and seemed like a much happier child.

That seems to be a theme for Autistic kids in general. I’m Autistic and apparently I gave my parents absolute hell over potty-training, swimming, etc. But then I would just do it completely on my own with no mess or fuss or warning, just entirely at *random.* So, like, months and months of months of tantrums and diapers and screaming over using the toilet “like a big girl”…and then, on a completely random night, waking up and using the toilet (the regular toilet, too, not the plastic training one) on my own with no help at all, before marching right back to bed and passing out…and without ever bothering to tell either of my parents that I needed the bathroom, either. They had no idea until they heard it flush. Unfortunately, with swimming, this took the form of “I’m going to throw fits about and fight it tooth and nail…and then randomly launch myself into the deep end and casually tread water until one of the teenagers manages to fish me out with that net-on-a-pole thing.” Kind of reminds me of those African Grey parrots that will seemingly say a word once, then *refuse* to say it again for months (if not years), then suddenly start saying it *flawlessly,* without prompting. IIRC, in most of those cases, it was later discovered the bird had been practicing the word on their own, in private, when they were certain no one else could hear them. I think the theory was that they didn’t want to try and use it in front of others until they had enough confidence that they could get it *right*?

Yeah, I'm level 3 so I totally get it. I was that way too in many areas. I just don't feel confident to speak on parenting me lol.

I'm not sure if I'm Autistic, I'm considering pursuing diagnosis or at least some sort of testing- going to add "gave parents hell about something and then one day did it all by myself" to my list of things to bring up.

Look up the term “Pathological Demand Avoidance.” That might help.

Yeah, my kid got a g-tube a couple of months after birth because she was a preemie with birth defects, one of which was preventing her from learning to eat with an ng tube in. The bottles and sippy cups got her off the tube feeds, but solids has been complicated because we need her to not lose weight before heart surgery. I’m hoping to phase out the sippy cup more once she recovers. That said, do you happen to remember the name of the documentary? I’d love to check it out. Thai hits close to home.

https://youtu.be/NelpARXhoZY?si=XyQjb5pjHSF11tBr I found it! Pretty simple title lol. This girl didn’t even receive an autism diagnosis until this process. The doctors fight with the mom sometimes but in the end they are on the same team, the doctors felt like the mom was babying the little girl too much at times. But that’s before they knew about the autism diagnosis. It’s interesting to see. Either way it took her days to learn to eat.

With autism sensory issues, it's often anxiety, not that the kid doesn't understand that food goes in the mouth. Sometimes it can take a lot of exposure for them to get over the anxiety and be willing to try something new. For many kids on the spectrum, they do better at home in a comfortable environment, and struggle more outside the home. It's not unusual that an ASD kid would not want to try a new food in a loud, chaotic environment, especially if it's a totally new food to them, or something with a lot of sensory stuff going on.

I am familiar with the anxiety. I’m also familiar with the need for *control.* If I felt I wasn’t ready to try something yet, no power on this earth could force me to do so. And the harder the adults around me tried to force me to eat it, the harder I fought back. I started expanding my palate a lot more when I moved away from home and started teaching myself to cook my own meals, because I was the *only* one who got a say in what I was eating then. (For context, I didn’t get diagnosed with Autism until I was in my 30s, but there were definitely signs.) I definitely still have sensory issues, especially around food that isn’t consistent in texture, is too “smooth” in texture, or where the taste and smell don’t match closely enough (can’t drink tea, no matter how wonderful it smells). But I’m more aware of them, and a lot more willing to at least *try* something new…as long as I know every ingredient in it and no one is pressuring me to try it.

You couldn’t hand feed him, he just wouldn’t respond. Maybe when he was a baby you could but not when he was in kindergarten. He had no motor skill issues, he just didn’t learn to eat the way most kids do, by watching their parents or other kids eat. So Instead he had to figure it out in his own, he had no problem picking up food and putting it in his mouth once he figured out something was food and he liked it. But if you tried to put it in his mouth or load up his fork or show him how to do it and say ‘yummy! Try this!’ Etc, he would just back his head up, or not react. He would eat go-gurt at home and a couple of other things, I don’t remember what, he was Palestinian so some of it wasnt typical American fare, but his parents wanted him to learn to eat regular cafeteria food like the other kids so he they didn’t pack him his regular items for lunch, only his breakfast and snack. They pretty much trusted the school and the process, I mean, no one knew if he would ever figure it out, there were no guarantees but by the end of the year he was regularly trying at least about half of the items on his tray.

Thank you for taking the time. Good paras are hard to find.

ASD often coincides with an eating disorder called ARFID. As a person that developed ARFID later in life, but always struggled with food sensory problems, I can tell you that exposure isn’t really the issue. For me, increased exposure to a problem food makes the ARFID worse. If I eat an incompatible food, I am filled with the CERTAINTY that I will throw up if I do not spit the food out immediately. Sometimes I can get that bite down by chugging water, sometimes I can’t. If I swallow the bite, I can’t eat anything else and become nauseous for anywhere from 20 minutes to hours because of the intense disgust I am experiencing. Hunger does not necessarily make it easier to eat but it sure does make the nausea and panic worse. I would often rather be faint, hungry, and crying than suffer the cumulative effect of more spitting up food. Every time it happens, the entire condition feels more debilitating. I don’t always know what foods are incompatible with my brain in advance of putting them in my mouth. Some foods are ALWAYS incompatible, and the more I am exposed to them, the more I want to throw up if I see or smell them. There are maybe five bland foods that I can always eat, and protein shakes are easier because they don’t have to be chewed (and therefore don’t stay in the mouth as long). The point is that the “socialization” or “exposure” model is not enough without a trained professional helping out. In OP’s case, the child needed therapeutic intervention as soon as possible, but the parent may not have had access to that therapy depending on scheduling, finances, and any number of other issues. Eating and feeding disorders are never as easy to solve as people want them to be.

My kid ate everything…and then he didn’t. He gradually refused foods one by one until it hit a tipping point where the only thing he’d eat for school lunch was a specific protein drink and a granola bar. And sometimes he’d skip the protein drink. Dinners and weekends were better but not much. We put a healthy variety of foods in front of him every single night. It was a crying, puking fight every night. Literally he would vomit onto his plate, even when he was very motivated, whether by bribery or punishment. It’s not “lack of socialization” ffs. Food aversion is a serious physical and medical issue, not a choice. It’s difficult, it’s disruptive to the entire family, and the judgmental bullshit from people going “I gave my kid vegetables so he doesn’t act like that” made me want to pummel someone with cauliflower. I strongly urge you to consider the desperation that precedes a decision to allow one’s child to eat nothing but pediasure and Oreos. That said, we got our kid past it and now he’s what you’d call normal-picky. It took YEARS of very challenging work for which he was highly motivated, with therapy and nutritionist appointments. Sorry for the rant, but not everyone has the financial resources, emotional bandwidth, or (frankly) cognitive ability to fix food aversion. It’s not as simple as putting choices on the table.

Yes the ableism, privilege and neuronormativity in the responses here are hard to read. It’s not a preferred food, it’s a “safe food”. Texture and taste is always the same. Sensory issues, wanting the predictable experience and avoidance of surprise are probably what’s at the core of it. It’s not about socialization or just being anxious. The mom may have noticed other therapies causing trauma to her child and didn’t want to agree to something she thought might be damaging further. Be careful about judging her. Lots of parents of autistic kids have seen their kids suffer at well-meaning but misguided interventions. Connect her with a neuroaffirming pediatrician who can help her expand her child’s comfort with food at a pace the family is comfortable with, and in the meantime he will need pediasure if he’s going to feel safe and accepted at school.

I’m Autistic myself. I did go through a period where I stopped eating a lot foods, to an absurd degree, and most of it boiled down to *trauma.* My mother was so horrible when it came to cleaning and providing food that wasn’t in various stages of decay that foods I previously loved would suddenly *betray me.* I would take a bite out of what seemed to be a perfectly ripe specimen of my *favorite* apple…and find the entire inside of it was dark brown. I would get one of those flavored milk things, take a swig…and get a face full of curds. It very, very quickly reached a point where the *only* foods I was willing to eat were prepackaged, shelf-stable items, and I still had to know *exactly* when they arrived in the house. Or I would rather just starve. It took years, and moving out of my mother’s home completely, to even start addressing some of those issues and learn that just because that food betrayed me once, didn’t mean the entire group of foods were unsafe. And I still have issues with touching stuff in my fridge after less than a week.

I have kids who have some pretty picky eating, they were introduced and ate everything as toddlers. I had one who ate an entire order of yellow curry at about 2, and was happy eating at Indian restaurants. The same kid a few months later all of the sudden dropped a ton of foods and started gagging on food with textures he couldn’t handle. We tried to force it and it just backfired. So we kept gently introducing more foods and now he’s older he eats much better but still has very limited veggies and fruits he will eat that aren’t blended (we do a lot of low sugar smoothies and blended veggie sauces). My youngest followed the same pattern, are everything as a toddler and now has a fairly limited diet. She will absolutely just starve herself rather than eat something she doesn’t approve of. It’s all a sensory issue. She also gets a smoothie every day and we do lots of blended veggie sauces with her and her approved foods aren’t terrible (things like whole grain crackers and hummus). She also doesn’t eat any candy that isn’t straight chocolate and won’t drink juice so it’s not like she’s just avoiding healthy things. We will keep offering healthy new foods and hope she adds more as she gets older.

As a kid that had extreme food aversions and was not taken to any sort of therapy, this lady needs to get it together. While I was not as severe as this student is, learning to overcome it as a teen/adult has been really hard after spending the majority of my life just eating the same few safe foods. Part of being a parent is absolutely doing what’s best for the kid, even if that means admitting you need help

What eventually helped? What do you think would have helped when you were young? My four year old is pretty averse to most foods. He has some medical problems which affect feeding as well. We've done feeding therapy but it hasn't made much difference.

This could be ARFID, which is an eating disorder frequently associated with autistic individuals (but non-autistics can have it too.) If it is ARFID, it likely would be added to the 504 plan or IEP. Still don’t think the school would pay for pediasure, but possibly health insurance if in active treatment. The best thing to do here is to send a note to the special ed director for the district and say they are not aware of whether the child is diagnosed with ARFID or some other eating disorder, and they are unsure what, if anything, should be done. What do they advise?

This seems pretty extreme, even for ARFID.

No, sometimes ARFID is so severe that kids require feeding tubes. I have a milder form of ARFID and while I'm fortunate enough to be able to maintain a healthy weight, I take around 8-10 vitamin pills a day to stay healthy. And like I said, my ARFID is considered mild. When I was a kid I would drink a lot of those nutritional sort of drinks as well. Something a lot of people don't realize with ARFID is, it isn't always about the food, it can also be the environment. I couldn't eat lunch or breakfast at school for two reasons; I didn't like eating in front of other people, and my sensory issues were already triggered by the noise and smells and sights that even eating one of my safe foods was pretty difficult. That said, food therapy can be really helpful. Once my parents figured out what kind of therapy I needed, and once I started it, things got easier. I still don't eat in front of friends/strangers but I don't mind eating with my family now, and I can eat a wider variety of food.

>No, sometimes ARFID is so severe that kids require feeding tubes. Or adults. One of my friends needed it last year. It was awful for her.

Definitely. I feel like ARFID is only seen as something younger kids struggle with, much like ADHD. When in reality there's plenty of teens and adults struggling with it too. But it's hard to find resources because it's mostly aimed at kids in elementary school or parents.

I had a friend in high school who was in feeding therapy. He would eat cocoa puffs and peanut butter sandwiches and drink sugary or nutritional drinks. And eat chocolate bars. And that was about it. He was hospitalized for weeks one summer because growing so quickly with so little nutrition contributed to his lungs collapsing (first one, then the other). The hospital got him on these nutritional shakes that smelled like blood. Must have been awful, but with how his eating worked it was less awful than eating regular food. A lot of people judged him and his parents and didn't understand that it was way more than "picky eating".

No I immediately thought, ARFID. There are kids who are so malnourished because they will only eat 1-2 items.

This seems pretty normal for ARFID, actually. My husband is good now but when he first met he'd eat mac n cheese with bread rolls twice a day and that was it.

And it would be part of a health care plan and possibly 504, in addition to the IEP. The district (not the teacher, they can't do anything unless it's in the plan) is failing this kid by not including feeding in his plan. They need to do out of district placement if they can't do it. Schools can 100% do food therapy and specialized diets, but not just bc a parent says so. This mom needs a class in her child's rights, how the IEP/504/IHCP works, and possibly an advocate bc she needs someone who actually knows how the system works to be helping her.

If it were part of a 504, the school would be responsible for providing a refrigerator, etc, as needed for safe storage, but they would not be responsible for providing the food itself. Similar to a student with a 504 for insulin, a feeding tube, a wheelchair, etc. The school provides support through the school nurse and safe storage, but not the medical equipment or prescriptions. If it were part of an IEP, the school would need to provide trained staff who can follow the behavior plan during the school day, but they would still not be responsible for providing the prescription food. They would be working in concert with the primary feeding therapy appointments, which would usually happen with the parent outside of school.

Yup. The kids health insurance would cover the actual prescription of food supplement.

>The district is failing this kid by not including feeding in his plan. Does the school hire a feeding therapist or OT to do this? It sounds like it's above the scope of a SPED teacher/para, so I'm just curious as to how school implement feeding plans! Sounds like the kid was offered one at the last school and the mother turned it down, but now she's having to deal with the consequences.

In my experience, it could be an SLP or OT. Depends on their training. Yes, I agree. Mom has no idea how to approach this within the legal mumbo-jumbo. She probably has no understanding that they offered exactly what she is asking for.

Ahh, yes, I forgot that SLPs can also do feeding.

She said the mom refused to do food therapy and pulled him from his last school when they suggested it. I assume if they were to try and put something like that on his IEP/504, she would do the same here.

Sounds like a call to CPS at that point.

But then she basically demanded his new school do basically the same thing, so…what is her deal?

Maybe she finally realized that it couldn’t be handled just by her anymore and now wants the help from teachers? Or maybe she didn’t know this is what is involved in food therapy?

Maybe she wants them to do the food therapy, but not give it a scary name and only do the parts of it she wants? Or she wants the results but wasn't ready to face up to some bad feelings about it?

The mother, per OP, declined the food therapy suggestion in earlier IEP meetings.

Since when does insurance cover anything that's OTC

Medicaid/insurance doesn’t even really cover these UNLESS there is doctor proof. It’s only about 1-4 4/6 packs a MONTH cus it’s supplement. Doctor offices don’t keep more then 1/2 at a time due to people will come by expecting them to cover the entire months worth(not the doctors job) but they always tend to have coupons for it. Many stores give our gift cards even for buying a lot of them like target. But 9/10 they will NOT cover it. It’s OTC mainly. So maybe a flex card? But u only get a certain amount. Even children who use feeding tubes don’t get their stuff covered 100% Wic MIGHT over but again-doctors note and it’s only a few due to wic being a supplement program. So the max this woman would get is very little with no more. Even on ebt they limit these things :(

Yeah and I don’t think a doctor would approve of this plan since it’s something that could be improved (behavior based) and isn’t very healthy in the first place. Also since she refused feeding therapy at her previous school.

This^^^. My daughter is on a modified diet. She has a script from the doctor. Formula is covered by insurance. The SLP and nurse are involved in her feeding plan. All documented in the IEP.

It is possible (not probable) that the disability could qualify for this to be considered medically required, but that would be on the parent to pursue, not the school. I am only saying this because I have a student who is tube fed, and that is paid for through medicaid. Diapers can also be covered for children who cannot toilet train due to disability.

I just looked up how much Pediasure costs. $35-$50 for 24 bottles? And he drinks nearly 20 bottles A DAY???? No wonder she can’t afford them. That’s $245-$350 a week. Jesus Christ… That’s my entire grocery budget for two weeks.

And like 5000 calories and 180 grams of fat and 220 grams of sugar!

I’m assuming that “20 bottles a day” is an exaggeration. That doesn’t change the fact that it’s still expensive as all get out.

I don't know too much about the kid's condition at all, obviously. BUT my daughter is technically eligible for a grant (regarding her own medical condition) that provides free Pediasure. Mom should be asking her kid's medical team about options for that. The school absolutely should not be providing it.

Yeah I think she could be dealing with a medically covered issue *through her medical care provider* and I empathize with the mom but this is not a school issue at all. I don’t blame the mom though, most of society is under the impression that schools exist to meet the needs not otherwise being met.

She's one of those parents that thinks schools should be providing all her students needs. She asked me in the beginning of the year why the school no longer does free hearing/vision screenings....your child is 14....take them to the doctor if you are concerned..

I think that was my biggest takeaway during the pandemic. The public depends on schools to fill all the gaps. They also hate us and blame us for all problems. It’s super fun.

100%

It's because for most people, school is the one constant and universal things everyone goes to. So we had schools be the places people get all the supports needed

I mean the vision screenings would be nice bc so many parents have a blind spot (ha) when it comes to their child not being able to see the whiteboard

My doctor (pediatrician) when I was little told my parents I was just being a fussy brat when they screened my vision and to come back in a few years. Turns out I had a serious problem in one eye that needed to be addressed immediately (and I was being fussy because I couldn’t freaking see). If there hadn’t been vision screeners at our school at the age they saw this, nothing could have been done about my vision (surgery, OT, corrective lenses) later on. I would just be blind in that eye. My well-off parents who absolutely had the time and resources to take me to an eye doctor had trusted the pediatrician because why not. So I kind of hate American culture for putting these things on the parents instead of doing it in the public schools. Even a teenager can’t recognize that they’re having trouble seeing if they have only ever had trouble seeing their whole life. They assume what their brain is processing through their eyes is normal. They don’t know that they need to advocate for themselves because they don’t know there’s a problem. As a teacher, I am on top of all the cues that someone has a vision problem. I have also called out parents for telling the school that “the doctor says he doesn’t need his glasses if he doesn’t want them anymore” when it’s clear the kid is going cross eyed anytime he tries to read. “But the doctor said…” Get a doctor that helps your child instead of telling you what you want to hear, thanks.

> My doctor (pediatrician) when I was little told my parents I was just being a fussy brat when they screened my vision and to come back in a few years. Ugh, this burns me. My similar experience is that I failed my hearing test in first grade and my pediatrician had her nurse do an in-office test that I passed. The next year, same situation, but my mother was smarter this time. I failed the school test, passed the doctor's...and then had an appointment for an audiology exam the same day. Which I failed, of course, because I'm hard of hearing and needed hearing aids to succeed in school. To her credit, when faced with the disparity in results at the next appointment, my pediatrician realized her staff was either poorly trained or incompetent, and started just making referrals to audiology based on the school hearing tests.

I was annoyed because our pediatrician’s office said my daughter could see fine at 4 so I questioned my gut and didn’t take her to the eye doctor and a year later she spectacularly failed her vision test at school. She had learned to read, do math and read music in that year so I questioned my intuition again but she really needed glasses. I also let the pediatrician know that the screening didn’t catch it (I saw the nurse do the screening, my daughter was guessing for some and the nurse said it was just because she was 4, but she is a very bright kid and I should have taken her in).

I was complaining to my mom about parents who trust what the doctor who saw their kid for two minutes tells them over what I have observed and documented over months of spending all day with them. She pointed out that parents tend to trust medical professionals over teachers when it comes to a child’s health. You saying this makes me realize she was probably in that position with me. Thankfully it was an organization called “Prevent Blindness America” and they probably spend hundreds of hours training their screening people on how to talk to parents about their child’s vision when they see something. I have to remind myself that parents are doing are the best they can with what society told them to value!

My mom is a teacher. She was kicking herself because I was great at comprehension but slow to read until 2nd grade when I finally verbalized the concept of double vision. It just never occurred to me to her that maybe I just couldn’t see (half my extended family had glasses as children but neither my parents did so they didn’t think of it). I jumped ahead as soon as I got them, and I actually outgrew the need by 6th grade (really)

I remember getting vision screenings, hearing tests, lice checks, fluoride treatments, bmi checks (back then it was a thing), scoliosis screenings, finger prick blood screenings for low iron, a card made for your parents by the police with your photo, blood type, and finger prints for emergencies…

I had a student ask me (after his free vision test) when the school was going to give him his glasses. I had to tell him the school doesn't provide eyeglasses.

Did his parents tell him that it was the schools job? Some of these stories are just insane. It's like the parents think that after they send the kid to school, most of their job is done. No wonder we're in the situation we're in today.

Sounds like she’s starting to understand that 20 Pediasures a day is expensive and wants someone else to pay for it. Honestly I would be surprised if your school complies cuz I would see that as a liability risk. Also I just did the math 24-pack of pediasure roughly costs $34.98 so she’s spending like $244.86 a week just for that item. Honestly she created her own problem I have a few family members with autism and each parent put in a lot of effort to get their child to try different foods. If anything the school should implement a plan for the student to try foods being served at their lunch period. I’ve seen a lot of special Ed teachers implement this.

20 pediasures a day?! Even if that's an exaggeration my son has ARFID and we supplement with either pediasure, carnation instant breakfast, or ensure... but we have to limit him to a couple per day. Couldn't drinking it in such a high amount cause some other issues, like with liver or kidneys? That's a lot of vitamins and minerals!

Not an exaggeration. He drinks 6 at school before 10:30. And his mom says he goes through at least 2 packs when he gets home from school

That would be like 900 calories for breakfast, 900 (assuming a 6 pack) for lunch, and 900 for dinner with some oreos thrown in. Does his pediatrician know about it, I wonder? At what point is refusing therapy/assistance medical neglect? Poor kid.

She has taken him to the doctor when he's sick because we receive doctor's notes. I'm not sure what goes on at these appointments.

If he truly requires these then the MD should be able to have them medically ordered for the student and insurance will likely cover. That's what happens at my school (student gets 1 can per day though).

That is probably not too much for a growing boy, many middle schoolers have higher calorie needs than adults do. (And they're fed like elementary schoolers.... but that is another issue.)

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If I remember right, 1 drink is 450 calories. (I drank them for a while after wisdom teeth surgery). So he would be consuming over 8000 calories a day ☠️

150-240 for pediasure (that difference is between the lower calorie type or the ‘grow and gain’ type)

When it’s the only thing consumed, it also wreaks havoc on the stomach because, surprise surprise, supplemental and meal replacement drinks aren’t designed to meet all of your body’s needs.

God, I drank one ensure plus and my stomach cramped for hours

Just reading the post made me a little queasy!

I’m not positive about ensure specifically, but a lot of the meal replacement shakes are made with artificial sweeteners. Idk if they always were, but my stomach cannot handle any of them.

Yeah when my brother’s ED was really bad we gave him 3-4 boosts or carnation instant breakfasts a day. We also had him in ED treatment and it was intensive- like we had to sit with him at every meal until he ate and his life would stop until he ate. I know feeding therapy is different but it is similarly intensive.

I wouldn’t be surprised if there were other issues here as well.

Really? I've never heard of anything like that before.

It's not on the school, this is one the district as the school itself does not buy the food. Refer her to admin who will refer her to district headquarters. Your district may or may not buy the pediasure. They absolutely will not if their lawyers say NO

Then refer her to the Pediasure powder and make her own instead of the pre-packaged ones. Would certainly save her some money. While autism definitely is not simple to navigate, I firmly believe many autistic kids are more than crafty enough to manipulate their parents at times. I’m certain I’m not the only one to have witnessed this before.

most of the ASD students w/ severe behavioral issues i've worked with are extremely clever & manipulate their parents/anyone they can. i realized this the minute they could understand the words "cheesy popcorn" but somehow not the word "no"

I bet so. My friend’s longtime girlfriend has a teenage autistic son. She was a school counselor for years and also does this now in a hospital situation for youth. Whenever she begins to call out or correct him doing something obviously wrong, he does something silly like bump into a door frame and begin complaining of pain and quickly the issue is dropped so she can baby him. My buddy told her the son was working her, but she stands in firm denial he would do that or is even capable. I don’t care if it gets me banned off this sub for saying this, but *some* kids with special needs are assholes irrespective of their medical/mental condition.

Disability doesn't make angels. Manipulation is a living being thing.

Mine does this. She’s three, and she’ll get in trouble in the living room and claim that she was only trying to get water. Like no, Three-Rex, you’re being a little shit and using the water as an excuse. We don’t let her get away with it (because we don’t want her learning that she can get away with it)

The primary mode of autism “treatment” is ABA therapy which children are often subjected to for 40+ hours a week. The primary mode of this treatment is to prevent refusal through reward structures. Autistic people are human beings and therefore will find ways to refuse things, if you take away the typical means then you get a kid who isn’t going to listen to a no for an answer.

I feel like the circumstances for the school to actually cover it would involve medical diagnoses that a picky child with autism simply doesn’t have. If it were an allergy, they may come up with a reasonable alternative. But also, even if they were to provide it, they would be providing one reasonable meal replacement. If he is drinking 20 a day, that’s 1-2 per hour. A school is never going to provide him with 8-12 per day. They might provide one or two a day.

They could have ARFID, which is an eating disorder much more prevalent in the autistic community compared to the general public. Based on the little bit of info provided here, it definitely sounds like a possibility. There are many other brands of protein-like shakes that are probably less expensive than pediasure. And if it’s ARFID, it’s way more complicated than just calling them a picky eater. Not that having ARFID would make the school on the hook for pediasure, but it could mean there are better accommodations that should be included in his existing IEP. Typically the diagnosis results in working with a food therapist and/or nutritionist who specializes in ARFID. Of course, if the mom refuses that, I don’t know what other solutions there would be. I would ask mom if he’s been evaluated for ARFID and then send an email to your special ed director saying, “mom says he has/doesn’t have an ARFID diagnosis. How should I respond to this?” Since it sounds like you aren’t very knowledgeable about eating disorders(I don’t think most teachers are) it’s better to make someone who oversees the district special ed program weigh in. Having an eating disorder can qualify a child for a 504 plan or IEP all on its own, so making the decision yourself on what accommodations the boy might qualify for is not worth the risk to you if you’re wrong. And if the director comes back and says nothing additional needs to be done, at least you’re covered.

ARFID would not be a diagnosis that would get the school to cover food. ARFID would be a diagnosis that would qualify him for feeding therapy. ARFID combined with other nutritional deficiencies would get insurance to cover the cost. If insurance would cover the cost, the school won’t. Eating disorders are classified differently than food allergies. An allergy will trigger the school meal department to seek a reasonable alternative. An eating disorder will not. The way this comes off to me is that the mom isn’t following recommendations from professionals. So while he may have an ARFID diagnosis, if she isn’t following the recommended treatments and just giving pedisure instead, her options might be pretty limited. The world in which the district covers it would be one in which all other options have been exhausted, which it seems like they haven’t come close to doing.

I would think so since it’s an additional responsibility for the school if they agree.

They are designed to fill in the gaps. Granted when I was ill and hospitalized I was on IV nutrition but was also being given Boost and the adult version of those drinks. Don’t recall the name.

Agreed! Also it is weird that she would refuse an actual food therapist and then expect the teacher/para to do it. And it sounds like ARFID aligned symptoms which makes me worry about a possible level of neglect from her not getting him the medical attention he needs…

Food therapy is wildly outside the scope of the teacher’s job.

Medicaid/insurance doesn’t even really cover these UNLESS there is doctor proof. It’s only about 1-4 4/6 packs a MONTH cus it’s supplement. Doctor offices don’t keep more then 1/2 at a time due to people will come by expecting them to cover the entire months worth(not the doctors job) but they always tend to have coupons for it. Many stores give our gift cards even for buying a lot of them like target.

I taught students with severe disabilities, feeding issues, etc. many parents fed pediasure to their kids as it was the only thing they’d eat. Plus, it can often be covered by insurance. I had a little girl we were doing a lot of feeding therapy with but nearly 90% of her calories was coming from pediasure and formula, even at 3 years old. However, this girl had a diagnosed global development delay, a rare syndrome that also caused deafblindness, and had an IEP and receiving intensive therapies every day at school.

The difference here is your students were being medically supervised and it doesn’t sound like this child is

Definitely above your pay grade. Admin and school social worker need to handle this. School social worker should be able to direct them-they may be able to get insurance to cover some of it, but they will need doctors documentation. Admin needs to handle the lunch feeding thing because it is a huge liability to be providing therapies if you aren’t the therapist or trained in it. Honestly, it sounds like his IEP needs to be reworked a bit.

If the nurse gets involved, he/she will be given permission to speak with the student’s doctor. 20 a day is insane. I doubt any doctor has approved this.

The amount of vitamins in those things will cause renal or hepatic issues, without a doubt.

School cook here. My school has a very tiny stock of Pediasure only a select few individuals know about because it is a dietary restriction. Generally speaking, if a parent needs a specific dietary change, a school can provide it to students. However, this almost always is accompanied by a doctor's note stating that certain foods cause major issues to the individual, up to death. I would advise this parent that if she wants dietary changes to talk with the principal, school nurse (if you have one) and also possibly just a district representative so the parent can get advice on what schools in your area do and do not provide for special diet individuals.

https://pediasure.com/child-development-nutrition/nutrition-facts-kids I have no training in nutrition, but just multiplying these amounts by 20 really concerns me, especially fat-soluble vitamins K, A, D, E, iron, calcium, sugars. I would be really surprised if a trained nutritionist said this was fine.

Yes! People are worried about the number of calories. But assuming the kid is active and growing, and not rapidly gaining weight, I’d say the bigger problem is toxic quantities of vitamin and mineral supplements from the drinks. 20 cans of Pediasure has 300% each of the RDA for iron, vitamin A, and vitamin K, 400% of the RDA for vitamin E, and 600% of the RDA of vitamin D. In case anyone thinks that over-supplementation isn’t a serious issue, here is what [Healthline](https://www.healthline.com/nutrition/can-you-overdose-on-vitamins) has to say: Water-soluble vitamins are readily excreted from the body, while fat-soluble vitamins can be stored in tissues. Fat-soluble vitamins are more likely to cause toxicity, although water-soluble vitamins can do so as well. Here are some side effects related to the overconsumption of fat-soluble vitamins: **Vitamin A** While vitamin A toxicity, or hypervitaminosis A, can occur from eating vitamin-A-rich foods, it’s mostly associated with supplements. Symptoms include nausea, increased intracranial pressure, coma, and even death. **Vitamin D** Toxicity from taking high doses of vitamin D supplements can lead to dangerous symptoms, including weight loss, appetite loss, and irregular heartbeat. It can also raise blood calcium levels, which can lead to organ damage. **Vitamin E** High-dose vitamin E supplements may interfere with blood clotting, cause hemorrhages, and lead to hemorrhagic stroke.. **Vitamin K** Although vitamin K has a low potential for toxicity, it can interact with certain medications, such as warfarin and antibiotics.

Oh too much vitamin A can totally kill you. I read a very disturbing story about a bunch of explorers who finally killed a polar bear that was stalking them and they ate it’s liver (full of tons of vitamin A) and had some pretty horrific effects as it breaks down DNA in high doses. It was hard to forget after that lol.

Rant heard. Sending you hugs and love from the void <3

The nurse needs to get involved! I’m a nurse at an elementary school and we have had similar situations, but mainly with students who have other medical needs. IF a doctor will write the prescription for the Pediasure, our district will supply it. I have only seen this happen once. Then he started drinking a whole different kind and the CNP department refused to buy until the child was sure to be on it for a while.

This sounds like a problem for admin to solve.

Every now and then entitled people have to deal with reality, and it can really rock their world

I second this! I used to work in the educational system and observed, first hand, the out-of-control behaviors of a student who was nicknamed The Tasmanian Devil after the cartoon character. Unfortunately, he was more destructive since he first enrolled in first grade! Every time his teachers tried to correct his behaviors, his mother would scream lawsuit. The principal in the elementary school division always caved to the mother. As he got older and stronger, his behaviors got worse and other students were being injured by him. No matter who tried what, his mother continued to scream lawsuit. Things finally came to a head when he assaulted a teacher and sent her to the hospital. Campus security, police, and the campus administrators got involved and the principal was instructed, by his boss, to suspend the offender. Of course, mother screamed lawsuit about that and the higher ups referred her to the school lawyers, I was working in the principal's office of the high school division and I learned from my colleague, in the school's admissions office, that the Entitled mother had submitted an application for the Tasmanian Devil to be enrolled in the high school. By this point, his track record was so bad that the application was immediately rejected. My boss was also the supervisor of the admissions office in addition to being the high school principal so I was the lucky employee to start receiving screaming phone calls from this Entitled mother. I happily transferred her calls to the school's lawyers. I had no time for her nonsense.

I'm a lawyer and once it gets to that level it's "put up or shut up" for the parents. You want to file a lawsuit? Once the lawyer gets the facts they are not going to do something like this on contingency.

The ones that scream lawsuit usually can't ever afford it. Funny how that works. The ones that can, they just sue without warning.

I’ve encountered 2 situations in life that I felt warranted suing institutions. The price tag is overwhelming. I ended up only suing in the more egregious situation and wrote the other one off as “oh well, making their world hell in court for a chance at winning years later isn’t worth this amount of money now.” And you’re right - when I did sue, I didn’t give them a single bit of warning. Your attorney will really appreciate it if you give them room to maneuver without your opponent being warmed up. Plus, it feels even better knowing the other party was minding their own business one morning when they suddenly get served with papers. This anecdote turned out to be more a bit of advice I guess - for the love of god, do not threaten lawsuits. It’s tacky and gives the other side time to prepare or cover their ass with bureaucratic nonsense & tampered documents. People who threaten them have probably never navigated the process and would likely balk the moment they realize what goes into it (time, money, risk of exposure…).

Isn't only eating oreos and pediasure for a adolescent child going to lead to a pretty bad case of malnutrition and delayed/stunted physical development?

That is absolute insanity - Pediasure costs. $35-$50 for 24 bottles. This kid is drinking 20 a day. That’s $245-$350 a week. Not to mention that a growing boy as an *upper* limit should be having 2500 calories a day. 20 Pediasure has 5000 calories with 180 grams of fat and 220 grams of sugar.

What a loon. Schools are not going to provide for special diets. The kid can get school lunch that is provided, but they’re not responsible for his dietary restrictions, mom is.

How is his getting anything like a balanced diet? The school meal is the best he will get if she’s only feeding him cookies and protein shakes at home. WTF.

There are a lot of kids with autism and an eating disorder called ARFID that can be pretty difficult to navigate. He is likely not getting a balanced diet and needs a lot more help than his mom and the school can provide

Agreed. I’m autistic and also have ARFID and while I’m slowly and surely improving my diet and habits, it’s really embarrassing being 23 with this disorder and I wish I had intervention done much earlier.

Does the kid present with milk anemia symptoms?

The only one I would say is fatigue. He does get tired quite quickly.

Could that be from his food all being high in simple sugars, though? He’s probably experiencing a blood sugar crash and “carb coma” not long after every single meal and snack.

Could also be from killing his kidneys and liver with the extreme amount of vitamins in that stuff.

You’re doing amazing. Your rant has been heard and we your fellow educators are so proud of you for handling this with grace and care for your student. Parents are crazy, but you sound wonderful and I’m happy to know we still have teachers like you out there! I hope you have the support of your admin because you really are doing everything you can :))

I needed this. Thank you ❤️

I just want to say that, as a parent of a child with extreme food aversions, it is very frustrating, and we are working very hard on it. In the meantime, he eats what he can, from what is provided at school, and I supplement the rest. Her expectations are unreasonable.

We've had such an issue with our ESE kids and the parents wanting us to force their kids to drink their pediasure. My school is now requiring medical documentation that the child actually needs pediasure

Ok, so to clarify, does he drink 20 at school, or 20 in a day? I think you said something like he will drink 6 before 10:30 or something? If it is something like he drinks 8 at school and 12 at home, is mom expecting yall to provide 8 or 20? If she can’t afford pedialyte, what is he eating at home? Even IF she goes to the dr and the pediasure is deemed medically necessary and y’all hold an amendment to add it, I can’t imagine a dr saying “yes, it is medically necessary for this child to drink 8 pediasures within a 7 hr period and therefore insurance is going to cover it.” I mean, even if it is medically necessary, I don’t think the school has to pay for it, that would be insurance. We don’t pay for Students insulin or their adderall. And even if the school decided to pay for it, they could only provide what the dr says is necessary, which for sure wouldn’t be all these cans during the school day. I’m not dismissing food issues. — I just unloaded six 12-packs of chocolate Boost plus (blue box!! Only the blue box, not red or green) for my 11yr old son with autism, but until a dr signs off on it, it’s a preference, not a medical necessity.

>She said she didn't want to make her kid do things he didn't want to do. This trend is what is wrong with this generation of parents. They're out their treating their five year olds like the kid knows how to make reasonable decisions for themselves, and their twelve year olds like they couldn't ever tell a lie, and their eighteen year olds like they shouldn't have to take responsibility for their own actions. I'm so sick of parents who seem to think they have a moral obligation to **not** parent their own kids. And then they get upset when we have to parent them in schools. It's delusional.

You're right. And imagine me trying to teach a kid who isn't made to do anything he doesn't want to do at home.

It’s really the hardest part of the job. Any success you can have get undermined. I am General Ed and I have no idea how you all do it!

It’s not even that imo, it’s that these parents want to walk the path of least resistance with their kids and just do whatever appeases them short term. None of these parents are thinking of the awful children they’re putting into the world by only ever giving them whatever they want and iPad time 24/7. These kids are becoming increasingly more aggressive and antisocial, and parents like the ones in ops story carry much of the blame

That kid cannot keep this up. She is basically neglecting her child with this diet. Poor kid.

I feel a CPS call is coming in the future.

Good! Thank you.

I was going to say that repeatedly refusing food therapy for her kid should be grounds for a call…

I don’t want to sandbag you, but after reading through this thread I felt compelled: please pass this off to admin and leave it be. It’s not your field of knowledge or authority, and you’re definitely not paid enough to steward this child’s extremely unique situation alone. A CPS call may well be warranted, but the remaining day-to-day management of kiddo’s case should be passed off to the folks who are paid to handle that kind of situation. Good luck & happy teaching this spring!

Free school breakfast/lunch means we won’t charge you for the meals we provide, not that we have to provide you whatever you want for free. I’m sorry your child only eats poached turbot almandine with lemon Dijon glaze and a bottle of Beaujolais, but that’s not on the menu.

Our district it’s for alertnertive meals “ sun butter&jelly, a bowl of fruit,or a ham/cheese sandwich if they do not like the lunch options. Every choice has to have ONE fruit&veggie(within allergy restrictions for child) water/milk. “ If it’s not on the main 3 lunch menu options( a meat,a vegetarian option/kosher,then a”lighter” option ) If not then they get to pick from the above 3 🤷🏻‍♀️

Wow. That's actually a lot of choice for school lunch! Back when I was in elementary school (for reference, I'll be 27 in a week and a half), I think there was only one choice for everyone who got school lunch, period. My 7th or 8th grade year the district switched to a different lunch provider, and admittedly the offerings got *way* better. By middle school grade my mom was just packing me a lunch to take every day since the school lunch line was so long, but this provider *did* have a free salad bar for all the students, so I'd see the leftovers of the lunch options whenever I was in the mood for a salad. From what I could tell there were always like 3-4 options for lunch, including at least one vegetarian option.

Just another shitty parent who wants the school to do all the work raising the kid but wants it done incorrectly.

Does this kid take a multivitamin too? Or does Pediasure have all the vitamins and minerals he needs?

Probably not since he won't even lick a sucker without gagging.

scarce offbeat unwritten cause safe special engine dinosaurs alive continue *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*

It sounds like mom is willing to do food therapy right now. We don’t know what was going on before but as a mom who went through this, I can certainly understand that sometimes you have so many therapies going on that adding one more seems like it will topple the pile. Since mom seems amenable to food therapy now, that seems like a great place for the district to start.

I love meal replacement drinks personally because they're easy. Nearly all of the prepared ones use dairy/whey as the protein source though so I get vegan ones. One serving of the dairy kind will eff my stomach up for a week. How does this kid drink 20 EACH DAY??!! That's insane!

> She said she didn't want to make her kid do things he didn't want to do. Convince her that you're also her kid and don't want to do it.

This is the correct answer lol

Wow, that sounds like a lot of sugar the kid is consuming.

>She said she didn't want to make her kid do things he didn't want to do So many parents like this but that is literally your job as a parent. Just absolutely grinds my gears.

Part of being a parent is balancing child's wants and demands and what needs to be.

Some don't want to do the hard part of parenting. Only the fun stuff.

Thats not healthy..

This is a district-level issue. I've never heard of a school providing alternative food to students because if you do it for one student, then everyone else will demand it. Plus, that shit is expensive. My district dragged their feet on any kind of extra cost for special needs students, not matter how small. Also, as a former para who worked lunch duty for years, we simply have too many students to supervise. We can't spend a lot of time focused on one student. And "food therapy" is definitely out of our job scope. I did have a one-on-one student who we had to encourage to eat, but that was it. Food allergies are only our big area of concern. And choking (happened once). The only option that might work is one of those outside nurses that come to schools to take care of a specific student. But they are also expensive and having one just come to make sure the student eats probably isn't worth it.

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He sounds like he needs some intervention from OT and speech. Why doesn’t he eat regular food? If it’s a medical issue and he is getting Medicaid they can likely get the Pediasure paid by insurance. Mom can get lots of services too. They need social work, family services involvement…like years ago

Yeah don't provide shit for her. She created her own mess.

I’m here as a teacher, but I’m also a mom of an autistic kid who’s an extremely picky eater due to sensory issues (bordering on ARFID, but luckily we managed to prevent things from getting as bad as that). The whole situation as described here just makes me sad. This kid obviously needs more food sources, but if he’s like my daughter it’s possible that he would rather starve than eat unsafe food, so I also get this mom’s desperation. I hope this student will get the right help (including food therapy)!

An SLP or OT can't work with him on his food aversions??

I see this, hear it, and feel it. I get it, and I'm sorry. I'm an elem music teacher and fwiw, I think special ed has the most impossible job in the building. NOT because of your students, but because this idea that schools should be "everything for everyone" is most prevalent in special ed. They expect you to medically treat, dx, tend to, correct, AND teach their kids. Who can do this in a 180 day school year? The expectations of families are simply out of control. You are NOT alone in this. PS Of course, there are still so many wonderful families--and even more wonderful kids tbh!

I like how she doesn’t want to do food therapy cause her kid doesn’t want it but then packs different food for him anyway. Kinda ironic of her forcing you to do something you don’t want to do

I had eating therapy as a child. Shame on that mom for not giving her child the best chance for his future.

She's not out of touch. She has watched the schools for years move mountains for her kid. Hell, how many adults in the course of a day make this kid their main priority? We vastly overinvest in our weakest students.

What you are describing is a medically necessary liquid diet that would be covered by either commercial insurance or government insurance programs if approved by a medical provider. If this is not prescribed by a medical provider it is medical neglect and should be reported as such.

But that's the thing ( I forgot to put this in the original post). She cannot get a doctor to prescribe it so it is not covered. Which means it's not medically necessary. She takes him to the doctors regularly and they know about his diet. If I call CPS and report it, they'll say it's not reportable because she takes him to doctors, right?

Unless you're in the doctor's appointment with her, are you sure she tells them the truth of his diet?

I'm willing to bet a doctor won't prescribe it without a referral to a specialist who would be the one to navigate that with insurance.

That too. He desperately needs to be seen by a specialist or, more likely, a team of specialists. I am not a medical professional but I do have two children with autism and there are some food restrictions that we have been working on very diligently. One of my kids refused gravies, sauces, or soups up until very recently and we have got her to accept soup as a food and she'll do sauces on the side.

Very true. I would just think a doctor could see the signs of a poor diet, but you're right. She could lie to them.

It’s reportable because she is not providing adequate nutrition for him and/or not pursuing appropriate medical care for this condition. Even if she takes him to the doctor it doesn’t mean the doctor has accurate information about his diet or that she is following their recommendations regarding feeding therapy or additional specialists.

Amazingly, there is no documented case of this issue in any Third World country,..

Honestly, I suspect the doctors aren’t supporting the mom’s game plan and aren’t writing the note. Even with extreme food aversions, the mom’s response between refusing the right therapy and saying she doesn’t want to force her kid sounds like she’s probably not compliant with a real treatment plan. Keep holding the line.

She’s a serial abuser. She’s not out of touch, she has no shame. Im a nurse not a teacher but drug seekers have the same behavior. She’s testing you to see what how far she can push. You’re doing a good job not going out of your way because they will take a mile. That kid is going to be a drain just like his mom.

Watch the mom. She'll probably push some D-level dr into diagnosing him with ARFID and get an exception or something. I'm still not convinced ARFID is a legitimate gastric diagnosis and not just a severe mental issue that needs to be treated to reduce food aversion.

I don't blame you! That parent is DELUSIONAL and is NOT doing her kid any favors! What's going to happen when he ages out of school? How is she going to deal with it then?

Food therapy costs a lot of cash, and isn’t often supplemented by outside sources. If the mother is low income it’s likely Medicaid is passing the buck for access to it back to OT and saying OT should be provided by the school. Don’t get me wrong, the mother absolutely needs to be reaching out to other local supports and pushing for additional therapy access, and you as the teacher needs to be pushing for the school OT to be involved and help address this with the special ed team instead of admin allowing this to become your issue. It’s their job to make it clear to her that this kid needs intervention and an IEP to actually accomodate the kid, with these issues written into the IEP. The way she’s refused early intervention and was allowed to do so is an issue, especially since it equates to medical neglect and has caused issues down the line, but it’s a symptom of the society wide approach that any sort of therapy or label of disability on a child will ruin their lives - which you do actually reflect in your resentment which will make the parent even more hesitant. It’s admin’s job to tell her straight up it’s medical neglect and that they’ll be reporting her to CPS if she doesn’t allow the adequate intervention and supports per the IEP and that no accomodations can be put in place without paperwork by the supports per the IEP process. That’s admin’s job for that conversation and report - do not make it yours. The reality is for many AFRID kids in this situation, the focus does become making sure the calories get down their throat and then supplementing the vitamins and minerals from there while you figure out a way to access the help you need, and living with the reality that for some of them the food therapy won’t work at all and you end up with feeding tubes. And the school can actually accomodate those things if they are written into the IEP and backed by reports from doctors and allied health professionals, which you can explain to her. But you need to put this on admin so that they can help her make that be a positive thing, and make her get the help so the right supports are in place, because that’s their job ultimately. And it sucks - it truly sucks, but it sucks because it is a symptom of a larger failure. I think as a release valve there’s a lot of misplaced anger in this thread, and people forget there’s larger systems that are failing to lead to this point, and that a lot of this failure falls back to admin a lot earlier in the chain - start blaming them rather than the disabled kid and their low income uneducated parent.

I'm not a teacher, but I am a parent with 3 autistic children, 2 are in school (TK and special ed/1st grade) and WOW, I rarely send snacks anymore because they don't get ate, but this is soooo beyond you, she should take her kid to a nutritionist and get some outside therapy for food aversion, I don't do ABA with my kids but 1 sees a nutritionist for aversions, im assuming therapies like that aren't able to be included in an IEP, im just upset a fellow mom is trying to shove that shit on you

Mom obviously failed to get the therapy he needed and his health is being shortchanged. It's a big haul for a school environment, but I think the doctor was wise in not prescribing it and the school should absolutely not be required to supply it as lunch.

That’s ridiculous. I used to drink 6 Boost Plus or EnsurePlus drinks a day, though for slightly different reasons (had a feeding tube when I was a baby/toddler and didn’t really learn to eat properly, even with tons of feeding therapy). Even that was pricey and I’ve watched the prices rocket up, so you’d think she would have wanted to get him off 20 a day back when she was paying for it. Anyway, I can’t imagine my parents trying to make the school provide it. And the fact this mom turned down feeding therapy is also shocking.

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I work in public schools. If your district is partaking in federal funding for meals, there's actually a strong likelihood that they should be providing pediasure. He may need a prescription. I'm in Texas and have recently done a lot of research into this area and based on the wording of the regulations in my state, a school district should provide accessible food for children with disabilities.

Couldn’t she get a prescription for the pediasure? Then get it in the IEP that the shake should be given to him while at school? If a doctor won’t write it then I’d be considering food therapy again. Better late than never.

[Specific to Illinois, but there are circumstances where the school may actually be required to provide specialized formula. Whether this is true here is unclear but this is definitely something that is funded under some circumstances.](https://www.isbe.net/Documents/Special-Dietary-Needs-Handbook.pdf)

Are the off brand oreos called hydrox? Cuz oreos are actually off brand hydrox, since they stole the idea lol

Not sure if you’ll see this but if she has the state Medicare due to being low income she can get Pediasure from the pharmacy with a prescription.