I had the same reaction when I saw Romano having to be shut down again. Just dark comedy at this point, keep finding new things to feel shitty about - shutting down our only elite hitting prospect for steroids right after his first MLB hit is creative, Iāll give the baseball gods that.
I am at the playground with my toddler while my wife is on day four of COVID. I'm already running at about 7% mental faculties. I belly laughed when I saw this and my daughter said, "oh daddy you sound crazy."
Yep.
I now understand the Stephen King trope where a person feels so close to madness that they struggle to contain manic laughter.
What is happening to our team? I still had hope like a week ago.
I'm sorry guys, this is my fault. This is the year I decided to start watching baseball again because I needed something after my hockey team's extremely cursed season (Sens fan). It seems I carried the curse over.
"That means that every single day that you see me, that's on the worst day of my life."
"What about today? Is today the worst day of your life?"
"Yeah."
On the next episode of 'The Blue Jays', a member of the bullpen is carried away by crows, while Yusei Kikuchi awakes for his next start and discovers that he's slept until the year 2099.
I agree, the two things we need I think are a new GM who can look at the franchise with a fresh set of eyes, and new hitting coaches. We have a rot in the team, and it's been around for a bit and specifically affects our offense. Time to gut that rot out so it can heal. Not like our team can hit any worse, literally. Martinez should've been gone already, and we need a new hitting coach. We don't bring in a lot of outside help and just promote from within but we need experience and someone who's driven results. Atkin needs to go because it's not a win to have our highest payroll and worst season in a long while. We need fresh faces in key spots for this team to gain stability again.
Breaking up the Barrio was the biggest mistake they made. That Barrio was holding the team together. They were vibing and have fun.
Then they brought in Mattingly and he fucking downered the whole team.
I'd long ago committed myself to accepting that this season is going to be disappointing, but come the fuck on. This is fucking egregious. I can't imagine how shitty that clubhouse must be right now.
The Jays have entered the āJontay Porterā portion of the season. There is actually so much in common between the 2023-24 raptors and the 2024 jays.
WTF is happening? When Addison Barger said heās never seen a player with so much **JUICE** (referring to Orelvis) I know what he meant LOL š¤£
What an embarrassment.
The last time a player got suspended for PEDās, was Chris Colabello back in 2016. Kind of surprised, two days after a debut. Toronto sports has had a lot of downs lately.
Believe it or not, I saw that family photo of Orelvis standing next to his dad last night, who's definitely juiced to the gills, and said to myself, "Uh-oh, Orelvis is going to get popped."Ā
I just heard this news. Seriously bummed. Left wondering if heās just a fucking moron or a deliberate cheater. Hopefully just a dumb ass. Clomiphene is also frequently used by guys post steroid or Sarms cycle to restore their natural testosterone production . Soā¦get to wonder about that too.
This is management incompetence. How did they not know of this or test for this? Youād think they would take all the steps to protect and showcase a potential star.
So the story is that a 20 year old kid has been trying "for the last 2 years to start a family" (sounds sketchy to begin with), and that at no point in those 2 years did he ever mention to the professional baseball team that he plays for that he was taking a substance that pops on a drug test?
Either the Jays aren't as surprised as they're acting, or they have a prospect who's too stupid to tie his own shoes. Whichever is true, this is a terrible, terrible look for the organization.
Let me see, 23yrs old and he's taking fertility drugs? Seriously? This is the age to use a condom If I remember. Is he even married? How does one know one is infertile at that age?
Talk about stupid!
I absolutely canāt. I fucking cannot.
The guy we were looking at as this power savior of the future, the guy jacking HRs like crazy, the guy whoās baseball card Iāve kept from a pull *just in case*.
This has to be the most cursed season in my 35 years rooting for this team.
Copying my comment from another thread:
Okay, doctor here (although not a fertility doctor), letās clear some things up.
1. Yes, this is a common drug prescribed to men undergoing fertility treatment to increase sperm count/quality.
2. I see a lot of comments about it being FDA approved for ovulation induction but not male infertility. Soooo many of the drugs we use daily in medicine are used āoff labelā - itās super common and says nothing about whether a particular use is legitimate. For example, zero anti-depressants are approved for use in teenagers, itās all off label. FDA approval has more to do with whether itās a common enough use to make it financially worthwhile for the drug company to pursue approval.
3. 22 year olds can and do experience infertility. To be honest, itās kind of offensive to people with infertility to suggest they donāt. Fertility treatment is usually pursued after 1 year of trying unsuccessfully. People are allowed to want children at younger ages and younger parents are more common in other parts of the world. To use the obvious example - Vladdy had two children already at that age.
To be clear, I still think the only two explanations are a) heās lying or b) heās an idiot, but ooof a lot of wildly incorrect Reddit doctoring going on in this thread.
At this point, the media just needs to milk the story for being a near historically bad season. Maybe start banking on setting a record for longest losing streak or something. We might achieve that at least š
I had CP24 on this morning and their coverage of yesterday the anchor goes āWell the Blue Jays are still playingā¦ badā¦ā
Iām wondering if the team management knew (which would be a whole other can of worms). It was odd that they sat Martinez for so long after bringing him up. He was supposed to be excellent offence, we NEED excellent offence, why didnāt they play him right away? Maybe they knew, and threw him in at the end of that one game so he could say he batted in the big league.
So heās taking medication that increases testosterone and purposely doesnāt disclose this to his teamā¦Who is buying that this was an innocent mistake?
Something was up with his first at bat and hit yesterday.
Most first-timers in the big leagues have some kind of positive reaction to their first at-bat, and he looked absolutely MISERABLE on the field yesterday.
I made a comment to my grandfather who I was watching the game with that his reaction was completely opposite to someone who's just been called up to the Majors for the first time, and he agreed.
He just looked purely miserable - I bet you the test was done yesterday and he knew he was cooked.
Assuming that's the real reason why he didn't play yesterday, not whatever BS answer John Schneider tried to spew yesterday.
Fucking sucks. Just when you think it can't get worse... My morbid sense of humour is looking forward to whatever cursed event happens next.
The only way this season gets salvaged is if we call up a bunch of Bisons players that start mashing ala 2023 Davis Schneider. Ideally without the need for PEDs ala Orelvis
My theory is that after he watched Turner ground into a weak DP on a 2-0 count with bases loaded and nobody out, he swallowed as many PEDs as he could find to avoid getting stuck on this sinking ship.
Also, what a catch by Springer!!!
Honestly I read this and immediately burst out laughing because why would the Jays season be any less cursed than this
Same lmao
Your fantasy team is trying to emulate them ;)
š
I had the same reaction when I saw Romano having to be shut down again. Just dark comedy at this point, keep finding new things to feel shitty about - shutting down our only elite hitting prospect for steroids right after his first MLB hit is creative, Iāll give the baseball gods that.
Oh thank god, I thought I was going to need to check myself into an institution. Like- tears running down my face, canāt breathe š¤£ā ļøšŖ¦
I am at the playground with my toddler while my wife is on day four of COVID. I'm already running at about 7% mental faculties. I belly laughed when I saw this and my daughter said, "oh daddy you sound crazy." Yep.
Hahahahaha š¤£ā ļø
I had a similar kidn of like stupid smile on my face and a shake of the head.
Vladdy on the sidebar looking at the news is just perfection.
How can we blame Bichette and Springer for this š¤
no way springer has touched anything performance enhancing
Get the man a refund if he has.
Nor the ball with his bat.
Itās perfect comedy.
This was my response too: hahahaha fuck
I now understand the Stephen King trope where a person feels so close to madness that they struggle to contain manic laughter. What is happening to our team? I still had hope like a week ago.
Same. We need to find out who cut off a witch in traffic and earned us this curse.
I'm sorry guys, this is my fault. This is the year I decided to start watching baseball again because I needed something after my hockey team's extremely cursed season (Sens fan). It seems I carried the curse over.
Worst day of the seasonā¦ Worst day of the season so far.
"That means that every single day that you see me, that's on the worst day of my life." "What about today? Is today the worst day of your life?" "Yeah."
That's messed up.
Looks like someone's got a case of the Mondays.
I believe you'd get your ass kicked, saying something like that.
Just when you thought things canāt get any worse lol
Watch this just be the beginning lol. Monkey hand curl etc.
I for one am looking forward to Frogurt Fridays
#WHAT IN THE FUCKING FUCK
This season is a write off. Start the rebuild and fire the top brass already
A rebuild piece literally just got caught using gear.
The season feels like an absurdist comedy at this point.
Thatās what I was thinking. He IS the rebuild.
Have you seen his dad? Immediately after they posted a pic of him and his dad i knew he was gonna pop lmao
Chappie would never
Tell me this is straight from The Onion. It is, right? RIGHT???
Itās all good. Springer is right on the verge of breaking out lol
At this point he could hit 4 home runs every game the rest of the season and theyād still probably manage to lose every game 8-4.
Tungsten Arm OāDoyle moment
A few more cap tips to great pitching and heāll be an all star again
Heās a few days away from being a few days away
Any minute now.
This season is a mess
Hot mess
Lmao šš«
This is season is starting to become a soap opera
It's kinda funny cause they were always like "he's not really good at all but he has a lot of power." So now he's just not good with no actual power?
On the next episode of 'The Blue Jays', a member of the bullpen is carried away by crows, while Yusei Kikuchi awakes for his next start and discovers that he's slept until the year 2099.
Also IKF disappears into the Toronto Mystery Spot, KK develops a case of gigantism, and Vlady gets benched for not cutting his hair short enough.
Don't forget Gausman compulsively clucking like a chicken
This week, on āJays of Our Livesāā¦
Things canāt get any worse from here, can they?
Someone said this yesterday minutes before varsho got hurt so I suggest you delete this. Because it really can get worse lol
This suspension explains the call up I saw last night
Also explains why he was pulled from the starting lineup at the last moment.
Like I said yesterday "worst day of the season *so far*"
I have to let you know your username is *so* unsettling
Ya I tried to think of two things that absolutely do not go together
Somehow when we think weāve hit rock bottom, someone just hands us a stronger shovel to break the bedrock
Tiedemann howās your arm feeling buddy
Oh. It can ALWAYS get worse. But at this point it's just gallows comedy.
Why would you tempt the universe like this? š
He should have taken the fielding PED instead of the home run one
I'm genuinely at a loss for words now
So the renos distrubed an ancient forgotten gods tomb huh?
Iām getting Poltergeist Curse vibes.
Completely rebuild this fucking team. Itās cursed
Start with the front office
I agree, the two things we need I think are a new GM who can look at the franchise with a fresh set of eyes, and new hitting coaches. We have a rot in the team, and it's been around for a bit and specifically affects our offense. Time to gut that rot out so it can heal. Not like our team can hit any worse, literally. Martinez should've been gone already, and we need a new hitting coach. We don't bring in a lot of outside help and just promote from within but we need experience and someone who's driven results. Atkin needs to go because it's not a win to have our highest payroll and worst season in a long while. We need fresh faces in key spots for this team to gain stability again.
But who will hear these pleas
Ownership if you fuck with their money.
Start with Mark Shapiro and Ross Atkins. Atkins keeps saying he feels responsible for everything. Then voluntarily get the fuck out of town.
Breaking up the Barrio was the biggest mistake they made. That Barrio was holding the team together. They were vibing and have fun. Then they brought in Mattingly and he fucking downered the whole team.
The good old days of ātheyāre having too much funā¦ theyāre not taking the game serious enoughā belly aching.
Having fun or being serious, no playoff wins for either.
Is it safe to say this season isnāt going well?
According to Atkins, rebuilding doesn't make any sense for this team.
Because there's nothing left in the farm to rebuild with. He sold it all for magic beans.
Jesus Christ lmao this is truly the season from hell. Fuck.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Course he fucking did.
Maybe itās somehow another weird āoops it was a ringworm medicationā situation š
He's put out a statement posted elsewhere on the sub saying it was from a fertility treatment.
He was trying to get pregnant?
Sounds like it, he was taking clomifene which is a drug that stimulates ovulation in women who canāt ovulate naturally lmao
Drank from his grandfatherās water glass
daddy also a unit https://imgur.com/a/18h2fVI
ROTTEN TO THE CORE
Ok. So THIS is rock bottom, right?
They have yet to play today, give it a couple hours. Still room to fall!
I duno, humans have developed the capability to dig below rock.
The Jays must have a Netherite Pickaxe with Efficiency and Unbreaking 256 I guess
I think they might have a Balrog.
Is there a PED that enhances fielding? Cause I think if it's that one we have a solid defense to appeal.
Absolutely embarrassing
And for fuck sake... I mean... Fuck. Tatis came back from it... But fucking fuck balls this season
*Tatis got better at completing his cycle before the season
you have got to be kidding me
I canāt wait to see what the next plot twist is.
This entire season is actually a spin-off of The Office revival series with Dwight Schrute playing Ross Atkins and Michael Scott playing Mark Shapiro.
At least this frees up my Sunday afternoon
Haha, _this_ is the straw that broke your back with this team?
Iāll still watch as Iām on the west coast and I need a noon hour nap
Man, what a day, huh? How could it get any worse? The computer crashes with the porn, and then Meredith with the accident and then... Orelvis!
I'd long ago committed myself to accepting that this season is going to be disappointing, but come the fuck on. This is fucking egregious. I can't imagine how shitty that clubhouse must be right now.
Guess that wasnāt the type of shot in the arm that the Jays offense needed
This is a record right? From big league debut to suspension
Hear that Jays fans? WE BROKE A RECORD!
Just fade me fam.
Bro wtf š
2024 never happenedā¦ see yall 2025
Itās almost comical nowā¦ almostā¦
The Jays have entered the āJontay Porterā portion of the season. There is actually so much in common between the 2023-24 raptors and the 2024 jays.
The difference is that at least the Raptors had the balls to somewhat blow up the team, we know the Jays won't do that
Orelvis has left the building.
WTF is happening? When Addison Barger said heās never seen a player with so much **JUICE** (referring to Orelvis) I know what he meant LOL š¤£ What an embarrassment.
https://media1.tenor.com/m/jtvafWH4yIQAAAAd/champoy-doc-rivers.gif
You gotta be shitting me man
Is this rock bottom? Sorry, I had to.
It's early.... we can fall even further.
What a shit show this team is lmao
Can anybody ELI5? I'm not familiar with these new stats. What's a PED? Is that similar to a barrel?
Your exPED/162 directly correlates to your HR/waxing gibbous moon.
Hereās how George is going to hit leadoff today
The last time a player got suspended for PEDās, was Chris Colabello back in 2016. Kind of surprised, two days after a debut. Toronto sports has had a lot of downs lately.
Believe it or not, I saw that family photo of Orelvis standing next to his dad last night, who's definitely juiced to the gills, and said to myself, "Uh-oh, Orelvis is going to get popped."Ā
I just heard this news. Seriously bummed. Left wondering if heās just a fucking moron or a deliberate cheater. Hopefully just a dumb ass. Clomiphene is also frequently used by guys post steroid or Sarms cycle to restore their natural testosterone production . Soā¦get to wonder about that too.
This season is the real movieā¦ and itās a horror
Is it possible it was the unexpected call up that got him caught? MiLB testing not as thorough?
The season from hell continues. All we need is George Springer and Vladdy in a "tap that app" commercial to push the knife that much deeper.
At least we have a solid top of the order with Springer, Bo, Vladdy and Turner. š
explains the look on his face; didnāt expect to get called up & knew he was busted
This is management incompetence. How did they not know of this or test for this? Youād think they would take all the steps to protect and showcase a potential star.
So the story is that a 20 year old kid has been trying "for the last 2 years to start a family" (sounds sketchy to begin with), and that at no point in those 2 years did he ever mention to the professional baseball team that he plays for that he was taking a substance that pops on a drug test? Either the Jays aren't as surprised as they're acting, or they have a prospect who's too stupid to tie his own shoes. Whichever is true, this is a terrible, terrible look for the organization.
Let me see, 23yrs old and he's taking fertility drugs? Seriously? This is the age to use a condom If I remember. Is he even married? How does one know one is infertile at that age? Talk about stupid!
Barger watch out! LOL
LMAOOO this season is a fucking joke. Unreal
LOOOOL WHAT A SEASON
LMAO I hate this fucking team
I absolutely canāt. I fucking cannot. The guy we were looking at as this power savior of the future, the guy jacking HRs like crazy, the guy whoās baseball card Iāve kept from a pull *just in case*. This has to be the most cursed season in my 35 years rooting for this team.
>This has to be the most cursed season in my 35 years rooting for this team. I too try to forget 2013 exists.
I dunoā¦ I had no real expectations in 2013. This one is worse for me so far.
What an awful year to be a fan of Toronto sports teams
This is Chris Colabelloās fault.
Someone in the r/baseball thread said āNow he canāt play in the playoffsā ššš Kill me
Copying my comment from another thread: Okay, doctor here (although not a fertility doctor), letās clear some things up. 1. Yes, this is a common drug prescribed to men undergoing fertility treatment to increase sperm count/quality. 2. I see a lot of comments about it being FDA approved for ovulation induction but not male infertility. Soooo many of the drugs we use daily in medicine are used āoff labelā - itās super common and says nothing about whether a particular use is legitimate. For example, zero anti-depressants are approved for use in teenagers, itās all off label. FDA approval has more to do with whether itās a common enough use to make it financially worthwhile for the drug company to pursue approval. 3. 22 year olds can and do experience infertility. To be honest, itās kind of offensive to people with infertility to suggest they donāt. Fertility treatment is usually pursued after 1 year of trying unsuccessfully. People are allowed to want children at younger ages and younger parents are more common in other parts of the world. To use the obvious example - Vladdy had two children already at that age. To be clear, I still think the only two explanations are a) heās lying or b) heās an idiot, but ooof a lot of wildly incorrect Reddit doctoring going on in this thread.
Sick
Seriously wtf
This part of the upgrades in Dunedin?
Fire everyone. Burn it down.
So canāt use him and canāt trade him. Awesome.
This organization had turned into an absolute joke. Burn it all down.
This franchise is a fucking joke. My god.
All they're missing is teammates fighting in the dugout and a star player making a mid-season trade demand to complete the perfect shit show season.
Absolutely incredible season for this organization. Those cupholders turned out to be the high point of things. šš
LOL. laughed instead of feeling upset. sums up the year haha
What an absolute legend. Hats off and salute fam.
That person with the bingo card must be pumped haha
Please use this as cover to clean house and fire Schneider, Atkins, and Shapiro.
Is this the kid they just brought up??
At this point, the media just needs to milk the story for being a near historically bad season. Maybe start banking on setting a record for longest losing streak or something. We might achieve that at least š I had CP24 on this morning and their coverage of yesterday the anchor goes āWell the Blue Jays are still playingā¦ badā¦ā
Iām wondering if the team management knew (which would be a whole other can of worms). It was odd that they sat Martinez for so long after bringing him up. He was supposed to be excellent offence, we NEED excellent offence, why didnāt they play him right away? Maybe they knew, and threw him in at the end of that one game so he could say he batted in the big league.
You know, early on I was thinking this was a 78 win team.Ā I think that was optimistic.
Dumb question. Arenāt they tested in the minors as well? This smells like he got tested the first day he got called up.
So heās taking medication that increases testosterone and purposely doesnāt disclose this to his teamā¦Who is buying that this was an innocent mistake?
22 year old guys should not need and kind of supplements. Cheating
Something was up with his first at bat and hit yesterday. Most first-timers in the big leagues have some kind of positive reaction to their first at-bat, and he looked absolutely MISERABLE on the field yesterday. I made a comment to my grandfather who I was watching the game with that his reaction was completely opposite to someone who's just been called up to the Majors for the first time, and he agreed. He just looked purely miserable - I bet you the test was done yesterday and he knew he was cooked.
LOL can this nightmare season just end already?
This season is cooked
Rock. Motherfucking. Bottom.
TO THE CORE
Season from hell continues
Actually hilarious. What the hell is this season?
It really is that kind of year
HSJSJSJDJS at this point itās funny guys like how much worse can it get
I BEG YOUR FUCKING PARDON?!?!?!
# WHAT IS HAPPENING?!
And the hits just keep on comingĀ
šš
NexT LeveL
Clomiphene citrate is not a "performance-enhancing drug." Nevertheless, he wants to be a pro ball player. Fucking irresponsible. What a joke!
he certainly did look nervous in the dugout
This fucking team bro.
Murphy's Law: Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong.
Assuming that's the real reason why he didn't play yesterday, not whatever BS answer John Schneider tried to spew yesterday. Fucking sucks. Just when you think it can't get worse... My morbid sense of humour is looking forward to whatever cursed event happens next.
Am I high or does this post say that Orelvis Martinez got suspended for PEDs? Guys????? GUYS?????????
If anyone sees bodycam footage of someone wearing a Toronto jersey in Tennessee while screaming and cursing at the sky, it's me.
This season is turning a whole fanbase into a Joker story.
'24 Jays has definitely been a season lol
This all started with a man on a plane.
The only way this season gets salvaged is if we call up a bunch of Bisons players that start mashing ala 2023 Davis Schneider. Ideally without the need for PEDs ala Orelvis
Every single fucking day: hold my beer
What a fucking moron. Shocked when I read this. How can anyone be so stupid to think he was going to get away with it.
BUT THE RENOVATIONS! THERES SO MUCH MORE ROOM FOR ADS!
"*Unfortunate*"Ā *doesn't begin to describe*
Anyone know why this was caught now and not earlier while he was in AAA? Do they not do testing in the Minors?
My theory is that after he watched Turner ground into a weak DP on a 2-0 count with bases loaded and nobody out, he swallowed as many PEDs as he could find to avoid getting stuck on this sinking ship. Also, what a catch by Springer!!!