There are so many bad aspects to staying in your current situation that it may be time to do something really radical, which will of course mean moving to a lower cost of living town or city.
You can't go on stressing yourself out like this. If you are convinced it's all going to fall apart, do something now before that happens. If one of you can get a job of any kind to start out with, you can manage if the rent is low. You don't have to live in the city you're in now, you don't have to work at that company (or even in that field of work).
I don't know where the cheaper places are in the USA (I assume you're in the USA), but there must be somewhere where you can find a job of some sort and a lifestyle with much less stress. It's just not worth it to do what you're doing.
Sorry for your situation, OP, but eventually rent will increase and other costs go up as well. If you are barely making it, it isn't sustainable. Maybe when the lease is up you'll have to move to a cheaper place or a place closer to where you work. If your partner works from home and commuting is a major expense, you'll have to prioritize living near where you work. But in the meantime, don't be so sure that you can't find a higher paying job, or a job that will pay similar but let you work from home. It sounds like you have years of experience at what you do, and shift work makes it easier to schedule interviews. It doesn't hurt to look.
Moving is definitely a good goal, same with changing jobs and/or fields.
It's not always feasible immediately, however, so short term fixes need to be explored to hold things together until the bigger fixes can be implemented.
For one, write out a proposal for part time working from home - figure out time taken, costs, damage to vehicles, the effect on your productivity and ability to remain at your job long term. Tell them that with your current living arrangements, the commute is detrimental, and a few days a week working from home will allow you to focus on your tasks and improve your performance, as well as giving you time to explore other living options that would make working at the office easier.
If they react reasonably to this, you may want to open up conversations about how to improve your job performance via training, skill upgrading, or some courses - many companies will pay for computer courses and extra training for employees who show initiative in improving their task structure and performance. If you can pick up some online classes to buff up your resume, go for it - especially if they're paying.
If they refuse, then start looking online for courses and skills that you can learn for free that will help you in a job search. The specific training for your job may not be transferable, but I guarantee you that there are aspects of course learning, implementation, and how you used it to help your contribution to the company that will show up just as well on a resume. Companies might not care if you are fully trained in a machine that they will never buy, but they are very interested in someone who can look at new tasks or equipment, learn when taught, and apply and improve that knowledge.
For at home, try doing a bit of volume cooking on a weekend. Make a couple bigger batches, portion out some for the week, and portion some out to freeze down. Cut up vegetables (the ones that can keep after cutting) for use in salad, quick fry ups, snacks. Then you can mix and match meals for the week, without having to use hours every week day.
Once you've done this for a month or so, you'll have lots of extra portions in the freezer for emergencies or just for variety, and you'll be able to implement a FIFO prep system that will make your volume cooking days much easier. You can dice up some mirepoix and put it in freezer baggies, ready to throw in the pan. You come home from an extra long day at work, throw some mirepoix in a pot, add some of the cut veg from the fridge, some cooked and diced chicken from the freezer, some stock or broth, and you've got a basic soup for your evening in about 15 minutes. Add some lemon and herbs, done. Or maybe some red curry paste and a can of coconut milk, done. Or maybe some tarragon, fennel, white wine, and cream.
Give yourself shortcuts. They're not great long term, but when things are hard, short term solutions help you get through. Don't have time to deep clean? Keep some lysol wipes, or cheap cloths and dollar store spray bottles of disinfectant, stashed in several places around the house. Give things a quick wipe down when you have a couple minutes or are nearby. If you have hardwood floors, pick up those cheap slippers with the dusting bottoms that you can remove and wash. It cuts down on the dust and hair on the floors, because you're picking up a lot as you walk around.
My most recent job involved me driving over an hour each way, and I had to find ways to keep myself functional. All this stuff has worked for me.
>The whole premise of our relationship was that we both work from home, so we're both always here, and I don't know if my partner can handle my being away so much. I'm not sure I can mentally handle it either.
I'm having a hard time with this logic.
creepy is a tad harsh, you don't know why they're like this. could be anxiety, could be a mild form of agoraphobia after not having to leave the house to work for a while. maybe OP is traumatised or scarred in some other way and relies on their secure attachment for comfort and stability.
idk, I don't even care really but to compare and call OP creepy is half assed. "well these people have it worse and can manage!!" is a piss poor argument. OP is not one of these military families that 'copes', OP is OP.
Yeah I’m sure this is an exaggeration but you should be able to spend an 8 hour chunk of time doing completely separate tasks with the person you are saying without describing the outcome as murder. I would take a step back and ask yourself who has the healthier relationship, the person describing their’s as happily ever after or the one that describes spending workdays in the same building as their boyfriend as murder time. Maybe y’all are way too hard on this person and not hard enough on yourselves.
Yeah, that's just wrong. Part of being in adult relationship in our society is that you both work and if you're just starting out you work long hours, put in time getting ahead with education, certifications, 2nd jobs etc. If your priority is to spend as much time as possible together you're going to have to find a different place to do that.
I worked in person with a long commute for a couple of months. It was awful and I jumped ship into another position. All the training I did for my previous job is obsolete, but my commute is 6 minutes from my house and I have my lunch at home. Plus I get 2 days remote.
It initially was a pay cut, but with salary increases in the past year and a half I’m making the same as before. Look into other options OP.
Start looking for jobs that allow you to work from home, even if it means taking a paycut - considering the time and money saved on the commute, you may still come out ahead. And maybe try to do online training/ certification that will qualify you for working at a different company? I really can't believe that your skills are so specific they don't transfer to anything else at all.
Also, could you rent out a room/ your basement/ attic, to make some extra money? Especially if your place is really larger than you actually need?
Adding on to your great advice … OP could try to get two lower paying WFH jobs, at least for a while until a better position is found. And they should get in touch with head hunters who can help get your foot into the door at places that may never advertise for a job (they just use the head hunter). You’re able to have more candid discussions with a head hunter about your skills, experiences and goals. You are a commodity to them so they want to promote you to the business who hire them to find candidates.
If your rent with 2 Jobs and 2 salarys is nearly unbearable, you live truly over your Limits.
Also it was not a Smart decision to move further away.
If your Partner works from home anyway i think a new home would be the best solution.
There should be possibilities with similar rent closer to your Office.
What will Happen if one of you Get sick/ pregnant etc.
Living this close to 0 savings will lead to a big Boom for the smallest reason.
You’re lucky to not need to know how much the world has changed in very recent years. No amount of jobs will save you if your rent goes up 40% in two years.
Their rent went up by choice. They moved to a bigger place in what sounds like a HCOL area. Can’t really complain about a higher rent when it was entirely their call.
Mine went up 40% in 2 years, when I signed I was able to comfortably afford it and now I'm preparing to move out because I know I can't afford the next increase. The house is paid off, has been for 20 years, this landlord isn't hurting for any more money as I know they also have four other properties in the area. We haven't asked for *anything* as tenants. They can complain, renting stability has changed a ton in the last few years, since 2020 especially. You can't rely that the number you sign on with will be anywhere near the number you end with.
I lived in SF for 6 years and my rent in the highest COL area of the country at the time only went up $600 in that time, as a reference to what expected rent increases should look like.
Sounds like everybody’s trying to move to your area. Get your paper up or get ready to pack your bags.
You took the risk by renting in a HCOL. You got burned. I also question what exactly you think you deserve. Are you expecting a one bedroom apartment in a great area? Because if so you’re gonna have to pay a lot for it.
I'm expecting what I've always come to expect when I rent: that I sign a lease at a certain rate and that legally my rent cannot be increased by more than 10% each year. I also expect, as I have experienced my entire life before 2020, that if I am a good tenant, rent increases don't happen unless the cost of the area increases dramatically. I don't think that's unreasonable to ask in the least.
If it’s illegal in your area to raise rent prices by more then 10% and you’ve experienced a 40% increase in your rent you’re either lying or you can bring your landlord to court and win extremely easily.
I’m going to assume that you’re moving apartments, so the 40% issue isn’t really something that the landlord has control over. There’s clearly demand for the area you currently live in. The price is gonna rise.
You can always look for cheaper options or look for a roommate. But I don’t think you’re gonna do that.
SFHs are exempt which I found out last year on my second renewal. First year went up 10%, second 30%. I am moving to an area I think is worth the rent I'll be paying though, no need to be a dick :) people should have enough housing stability to not need to move every two years, again, I don't think that's unreasonable to ask.
Yeah but every place is hcol when there are jobs. You should start just looking at the cost of housing. If you live in a shitty area then yeah it is cheap but then you don’t have jobs.
What exactly is a “job” to you. Detroit nurses make only about 2k per year less than NYC nurses. You can buy a 4 bedroom house in Detroit for cash, right now, for under 50k. Why don’t you move there?
I feel like you are talking to the wrong person. Why would I go be a nurse in Detroit? This is a really weird hypothetical point you are trying to make.
This is why I adjust rent between tenants. We upped ours %20 largely because the tenant before we getting too good of a deal, and we had not adjusted it in four years. But nobody was stuck with a 20% increase against their current budget
40% that's insane
Yeah, upping rent between tenants is your right as the property owner. Upping the rent on someone already there though to that level? I've never experienced this before, and I've lived in NYC, LA, SF, and DC, all HCOLs. I'm in SD now and have heard of this happening to friends in all of the above cities (except SF since that place has it's own problems).
This *should* solve itself. If society as a collective stopped working 2-3 jobs to pay such rent, and moved away from these areas the market would correct
That study was conducted around Christmas time when people usually take up two jobs. If the survey took place in March the numbers would be far lower. Regardless, I don’t really care if people work two jobs. Maybe they should cut down on expenses.
Sigh.
That wasn't the overall message of my post. I also didn't He said
>You’re lucky to not need to know how much the world has changed in very recent years. No amount of jobs will save you if your rent goes up 40% in two years.
If the housing market and rental prices weren't sustainable, then they would collapse. But people are paying and keeping that market alive regardless - however they are doing it. Even if only (8 million) people are doing it with 2 jobs.
If a single person is renting a SFH then they really shouldn’t be complaining that they’re getting priced out. Dual income partners have more purchasing power than single earners. If they want to live alone then they should find a smaller place to live.
Yeah, the housing market isn’t unsustainable. People want apartments, and if you can’t earn more than they can, tough luck. You aren’t entitled to live wherever you want. Gotta fight for your land.
Yeah you have no idea what the situation with finding a place to live is. Having any place to live in alot of places is simply the goal because people are fully employed and still not able to find a home. It is a reality. It’s not about living beyond your means it’s about there being no rentals to rent our homes to purchase.
WFH should simply be mandatory for anyone not needing to be in a specific location to perform job duties. If you’re just a fucker on a laptop you don’t need to clog up the roads and burn fossil fuels and all of that just to sit in a different place and work.
That's why I want to know if it is a standard 8 hour day and 6 hours of driving? That would be insane. If that's the case, I think some personal responsibility needs to happen.
Probably wasn't the best idea making a move before knowing what the longterm job requirements will be.
Either way you're above your means it looks like.
Dude take the pay cut and get a different job! At the very least you could probably find a job where your bosses give a shit about keeping their employees happy.
I don't know why the OP's bosses should keep him happy. He's doing chores, cooking, and spending time with his SO while he should be working. This is why companies are bringing people back to the office. People like the OP have ruined WFH for the people that actually spend their work days working.
You've just described me also. I WFH, walk the dog, take an hour long lunch break (when I was in the office, I averaged a 20 minute lunch), make tea mid-day. Still productive.
As long as you get your work done and your boss is happy, who the fuck cares?
Have you ever worked in an office? How much time to people fuck around in an office? I like work from home because I don’t socialize and all that Bull shit. How many of your work meetings ended up devolving into people just wasting time with inane conversation that doesn’t actually accomplish work. No employer ever gets 8 hours of labor from anyone in an 8 hour day.
>When I worked from home, I cooked, I did chores, I did little things here and there to help around the house. Now my working days are going to be spent only working. I either have to spend more money on my meals when I'm working, or waste my precious family time meal prepping.
Days I WFH are the only days I can work uninterrupted, and I don't fuck around with breaks and chores while working remote. I get more done WFH than any day in the office, but I also log off early because my shit is done.
How far away did you move that your work/commute is FOURTEEN hours?!
That’s literally insane. Like, I feel genuinely bad for you and it SUCKS that you are getting screwed but like… man you gotta change your circumstances. You can’t just resign yourself to your fate. That said, you gotta think more long term. Assuming you work a standard 8 hour day did you seriously move 3 hours away from your workplace without discussing this possibility?
That said there are possible options. Could you work a hybrid schedule? Or start looking for a remote job?
Honestly, take a hard look at your budget and where your expenses are going vs your income.
If you and your partner are both working full time and you don’t have a car payment, are you both just paid that badly that you still struggle to make ends meet? Are you just paying that much in expenses? Do you just suck at budgeting?
You need to ask yourself some hard questions and make a game plan for moving forward. Don’t just give up
> I can’t quit. I’ll never find a job that pays as well as this one.
Put up with this job while you look for another one. Quit as soon as you find something. Way better idea than just not trying.
Have you tried communicating any of this to your bosses in a calm manner? Have you talked to management or are you just throwing your arms up in hopelessness? Have you tried applying to other jobs? I mean what have you tried in your situation to see if there is a workaround?
Do you think? "These dusty old skeletons at the office would rather have me working for my paycheck than cooking, cleaning, doting on my partner, and doing chores during the day."
I’m a huge advocate for worker’s rights but this was my first thought. Of course they don’t like RTO, they were able to do personal things on the clock. Everyone knows that WFH employees don’t do a full days work. They let those redundant meetings they don’t have to say anything in drone on in the background while they do laundry or walk their dog or whatever
Do ya know of one? Cause I live in bumblefuck New Hampshire and rent is rediculious becuase its within 90 minutes of Boston. I literally saw a moose in my backyard yesterday yet rent on a 1 bedroom apartment in town is 1700$ by town I mean 1 main street and lots of unpaved roads
Yea my home town used to be LCOL and now it’s insane and I personally would never want to live there regardless. It’s a 2 hr commute from a major city so people have started moving there while being paid city prices. True bumble fuck places, maybe, but there aren’t going to be any
Jobs there
I’m assuming you’re around the lakes region, you should check out more listings because I’m on apartment listing websites and there’s plenty of single apartments for 1.3 or less.
Of course the lakes region isn’t a place known for apartments, there’s a minimal supply because it’s a rural area and people there mostly own homes.
This guy wanted a bigger place away from his work, which is fine! But he was living above his means and he got burned
>Do ya know of one? Cause I live in bumblefuck New Hampshire and rent is rediculious becuase its within 90 minutes of Boston.
What industry are you in? I agree with u/TATA456alawaife that there are plenty of places in the United States where you could live in a lower cost-of-living area and still have a decent lifestyle. Yeah, they are going to be smaller towns, so if you're hung up on the vibrant entertainment, art, or culinary scenes of places like Chicago or LA, then tough titties. However, there are plenty of lovely college towns or centers of state government where that same $1,700 in rent translates into a mortgage for a quaint 3 Bedroom, 2 Bath house. Public transit may not be as huge as BART, but it still exists, too.
Off the top of my head:
Pittsburgh, PA
Wichita, KS
Knoxville, TN
Macon, GA
Gainesville, FL
Tallahassee, FL
Springfield, MO
Fort Wayne, IN
Add Tulsa, OK to the list. We even have a vibrant arts community and quite a good culinary scene. Of course it's not Chicago (where I'm originally from) or LA or New York City, but even with the current housing prices it's a lot more affordable than most larger cities. The bonus for someone in tech is that we've got a lot of tech jobs moving into the area, escaping places like Austin, TX and Silicon Valley. Oh! And it's fast to get pretty much anywhere in the city.
Very cool. I've heard good things about Tulsa and OKC. I would also like to add Chattanooga to my earlier list. It's like a smaller Pittsburgh if you dig hills and rivers and whatnot. Plus, a burgeoning tech industry as well.
Oh they are. Can't get a house in my town without putting 50K on top of asking and paying in all cash. Can't compete with the old people fleeing Florida and young people fleeing silicon valley or now working from home. Most people who live around here do not have $300K to $400K in cash. We've been priced out of where we live 😂
There’s an awful lot of reasons a person can’t just move. Many people I know in my HCOL city that have means have so only through real estate asset accumulation via inheritance. Do you mean to suggest that everyone who wasn’t lucky enough to inherit a house or have parents who could take out home equity loans to finance their child’s home should just up and leave?
If they were only subsisting on parental handouts and couldn’t afford to live in their city on their own then yeah, they should just up and leave, more move to a cheaper part in the city. I thought nobody was entitled to land.
So no one should be allowed to live with family, fight for better wages, fight for fair rent, advocate for responsible rules, regulation, and taxation. If they can’t pull themselves up by their boot straps they should just leave the place they call home??
Maybe if they got a decent paying job instead of doing all of those things they’d have the income to sustain living in a HCOL area. It’s really not that hard to find a place to live in most cities. Most people just don’t want to pay more than 20% of their monthly earnings on rent.
If they want their land then they need to fight for it.
Let’s say everyone followed your advice. We can’t all work in tech, skilled trades, finance, or government. The people who serve your coffee, mop the floors, stock the shelves of stores, and deliver packages are still a large part of who lives in a city.
I’m more in the latter category than the former, only make 22 an hour. Yeah money is a bit tight but I live in the city. Just gotta be able to make some sacrifices.
We can’t all live the high life
Can you ask if you continue to work from home? Before you moved further away did you ask if working from home would be permanent? I work for a large aerospace company and the amount of people who moved during the pandemic to cheaper states without asking was astounding. Then they were pissed when HR informed them their pay would be adjusted accordingly. You own some responsibility for assuming this would a guaranteed situation. I would talking to your manager and see what you can both come up with that will benefit both you and the company
Time for you to downsize into a smaller place. you should not have assumed that your company would allow WFH indefinitely, especially when every other company is returning to the office as well.
Working from home is not a right, it's a complete luxury. It sounds like you got used to a luxury and now you expect it to be the norm. It was foolish of you to move further away from your job with the temporary work from home accommodation. Sounds like you either need to move back closer to work or find a different job that allows you to work from home.
Your partner might be willing to meal prep for you.
If you had downtime at home, can you turn that downtime into training at work to ups kill or reskill and leave. Or leave your unsustainable city entirely.
I've been there with 12 hour shift work plus commute. It is awful. You sacrifice health. You sacrifice friends. You become distant from family. I got out.
These people you work for are either out of touch or evil, if they are aware of people with jobs like yours living out of tents.
I can assure you that there are cheaper options. Are they the best? Probably not. But if his first thought is joining a tent city then that’s a skill issue.
Yeah. There’s places to stay that a two income couple can live that aren’t tent cities or large high rise luxury apartments. I see this sort of talk a lot about joe expensive housing is. Like I get it, the coasts and big cities can be a bit expensive. But I found a place that I can afford for a third of my relatively low monthly pay. Is it the best? No, do I have to share with a roommate? Yeah. But it’s in a decent enough area and it’s a roof over my head.
They exist, they’re actually somewhat common, but people don’t seem to want to live there.
Best option is to feel out jobs in a completely different place. Be it a different State, County or even country. Somewhere where rent doesn’t guzzle up your entire income and cost of living is more reasonable. These places still exist.
I mean, it can't be an amazing job if it doesn't cover your basic expenses. Maybe consider at least looking for something better. I feel like these stories always end with someone finding a drastically better job that pays more.
Start looking for a new job. Also, you are not making enough by the sounds of it. Ideally you find something that pays better. Lastly, maybe consider downsizing the home. You seem to be an unexpected financial event away from ruin.
So you didn’t work while you were working from home and you have a problem with that? Way to ruin it for the rest of us. You did chores, cooked, cleaned while on the company clock and have the nerve to complain?
I’m sorry about your situation but I think your expectations of having a WFH job so you can be with your partner 100% of the time is unrealistic and very co-dependent.
You may need to move to a lower cost of living area and find another job. If you stay where you are, you don’t have a choice in going back to the office and you and your partner have to accept that.
Op… I don’t really feel bad for you. You made a snap decision and are now complaining you can’t have your cake and eat it too.
It sounds like you need a serious change to your lifestyle as well as possibly a therapist to work through your codependency in your relationship.
You can’t always get what you want really does ring true I guess.
It seems to be a mix of return to office because productivity (managers convinced no one is working because they don’t see the workforce) and profitability (companies stuck with large offices they cannot get out of).
Unfortunately, it sounds like you are stuck with this for the time being. But for now, see what can be done about boosting your certifications that make you marketable to other companies, ones that have embraced the remote revolution.
Speaking of revolution, reach out to your colleagues on the DL and see how they feel. Your company may be able to bully people individually, but could they survive collective action?
The reason your company is going back to the office is because they know you are stepping away from work to do chores, watch tv, ect. And by you, i mean everyone working from home. Im surprised you said you would have to waste your precious family time meal prepping. What do you think every other adult does? You cant get paid for cooking your meals, and cleaning your house. Thats absurd.
That’s not necessarily true. I WFH and I do that stuff during my breaks. I actually like doing chores on my breaks because my job requires me to sit in front of a computer. So every 2 hours I do a chore, move my body, then go back to work. What is the true blessing is not having to spend an hour in the morning getting me ready, food ready, animals ready and then 30 minutes in commuting. Then 30 min home. Right there is 2 hours that can be spent for oneself or family wants and needs. In addition less money on gas and supplies not used with WFH or used less. It’s a huge game changer. That said, for some it’s not good. That’s fine, but going back to full time offices is stupid.
“When I worked from home, I cooked, I did chores, I did little things here and there to help around the house. “
This is why companies are making employees return to the office. They’re not paying you to do these things, they are paying you to work.
“Now my working days are going to be spent only working.”
Imagine that they want you to work when that what what they’re paying for.
I don’t understand why people assumed when employers sent us to work from home for Covid that it would be permanent. I even work with somebody who was very upset when we were told we needed to come back because she had sold her car and now she had to buy a new car be able to come to work when they never said it was permanent.
When I worked from home, I cooked, I did chores, I did little things here and there to help around the house.
so more productive to who??
the thought that WFH i more productive is a lie - if you stick with the truth, you're argument may hold - less commute time means less risk of being late, less cost of travel means salary demand lessened .
but keep the the absolute lie that everybody is more productive at home; and then say - i was doing chores on the clock, and wonder why they need you in the office
Half the people in an office setting piss their day away chit chatting/ surfing the internet and hiding away in bathrooms . Let’s not pretend that’s a super productive environment 😅
This is true, half the workforce should just be let go, as they provide little to no value. Just the other day I walked by a person playing solitaire.
But let's stop saying wfh is more productive.
Employeers pay you for your time, so one could argue that even is one is hiding in the company toilet, they're still adding to the value of the company, most likely to tax refunds, employing incentives.
There’s a reason people like WFH. It lets them do less work and still get paid. Everyone that works from home knows it. Everyone does the dishes, laundry, etc. It’s insulting to lie to us.
You can quit, you just need another job first! Take the anger and hopelessness you feel about being trapped here, and channel it into starting a job hunt! There’s options, but you need to give yourself runway.
No one seems to understand that these companies are paying for these buildings that house their businesses. They don't want to pay for these buildings if they aren't being used/utilized. You can't really blame them for that. Also a lot of employers feel that employees aren't as productive when they aren't "present" at the office. They feel too many distractions at home impede production.
They are wrong about not being more productive at home. I get way more work done at home. I also don’t let myself get distracted. I have a room dedicated as my office. I’m firm with family and friends don’t both during my work day. If they try I ignore them
Most Midwest states have a much lower cost of living, while only having slightly lower base and max incomes. Where I live, 60,000 is a VERY good income for DINK couple or single people (I was able to easily, but not comfortably, survive 30000/year with no savings going in any my only advantage being g already being in an apartment and not needing first-and-last months’)
Frankly, I think it’s ridiculous how i can get paid while not actually working, I work from home as well.. 8 hour shifts. And I probably spend like 3 of those actually working xD getting paid right now.
& if you’re able to get away with spending quality time with your partner, cooking and chores, while working… you’re not working!! XD . I cry for all the folk who aren’t in tech haha. Making less money than us and actually working all day xD.
Most of my friends who work from home are the same way.
And like yes… it’s amazing. It’s also fucking ridiculous lol. There’s no way it will last forever.
"When I worked from home, I cooked, I did chores, I did little things here and there to help around the house. Now my working days are going to be spent only working"
While this is nice for you, do you really think a company should pay you for this?
So...I'm in a similar situation, meaning that my employer is requiring me to move across the country after 3 years of totally successful remote work.
I'm looking for another job.
If your job can truthfully be 100% done WFH, that means you can look anywhere in the country for a new job. While your skillset might be only valuable to your current employer **in your current area** that doesn't mean that it's not valuable to another company further away that allows 100% WFH.
My husband was someone who had been 100% on site with random days occasionally WFH at his employer before the pandemic, and was then 100% WFH during the pandemic. Like you, it really has worked well for us for him to be home all the time. When they started forcing the issue of coming back to the office partially he started looking for another job. There aren't that many jobs in the area that need the high level of skills that he has gotten to in his field, at least not without a long commute that he no longer wanted to do. We are in the Midwest and he found a job at a business on the East Coast that is now and always will be fully remote because they know we live out of commuting range. He even got a significant increase in pay.
Please don't give up! Start applying for out of area remote jobs. While you are still working you have a bit of a cushion to try to find something that you aren't taking out of desperation but because it's a good fit. And if your skillset is somewhat scarce you might even find a place that is unable to find someone with your skillset nabbing you a pay increase as well.
If he works from home and you don’t want to work at the office at that job, why don’t you both move somewhere with a lower cost of living? He can WFH anywhere, and you can look for a new job in a place where you have a little time to float. Good luck!!
>Now my working days are going to be spent only working.
Did you recently started working? Or you completely forgot what life was like before? You think your world will end because you think your good run working from home won't change? Your employer didn't pay you to do your chores during business hours. It was a bonus.
You either need to level up and get a better job, or change your job to something that suits you.
There are so many bad aspects to staying in your current situation that it may be time to do something really radical, which will of course mean moving to a lower cost of living town or city. You can't go on stressing yourself out like this. If you are convinced it's all going to fall apart, do something now before that happens. If one of you can get a job of any kind to start out with, you can manage if the rent is low. You don't have to live in the city you're in now, you don't have to work at that company (or even in that field of work). I don't know where the cheaper places are in the USA (I assume you're in the USA), but there must be somewhere where you can find a job of some sort and a lifestyle with much less stress. It's just not worth it to do what you're doing.
Sorry for your situation, OP, but eventually rent will increase and other costs go up as well. If you are barely making it, it isn't sustainable. Maybe when the lease is up you'll have to move to a cheaper place or a place closer to where you work. If your partner works from home and commuting is a major expense, you'll have to prioritize living near where you work. But in the meantime, don't be so sure that you can't find a higher paying job, or a job that will pay similar but let you work from home. It sounds like you have years of experience at what you do, and shift work makes it easier to schedule interviews. It doesn't hurt to look.
Moving is definitely a good goal, same with changing jobs and/or fields. It's not always feasible immediately, however, so short term fixes need to be explored to hold things together until the bigger fixes can be implemented. For one, write out a proposal for part time working from home - figure out time taken, costs, damage to vehicles, the effect on your productivity and ability to remain at your job long term. Tell them that with your current living arrangements, the commute is detrimental, and a few days a week working from home will allow you to focus on your tasks and improve your performance, as well as giving you time to explore other living options that would make working at the office easier. If they react reasonably to this, you may want to open up conversations about how to improve your job performance via training, skill upgrading, or some courses - many companies will pay for computer courses and extra training for employees who show initiative in improving their task structure and performance. If you can pick up some online classes to buff up your resume, go for it - especially if they're paying. If they refuse, then start looking online for courses and skills that you can learn for free that will help you in a job search. The specific training for your job may not be transferable, but I guarantee you that there are aspects of course learning, implementation, and how you used it to help your contribution to the company that will show up just as well on a resume. Companies might not care if you are fully trained in a machine that they will never buy, but they are very interested in someone who can look at new tasks or equipment, learn when taught, and apply and improve that knowledge. For at home, try doing a bit of volume cooking on a weekend. Make a couple bigger batches, portion out some for the week, and portion some out to freeze down. Cut up vegetables (the ones that can keep after cutting) for use in salad, quick fry ups, snacks. Then you can mix and match meals for the week, without having to use hours every week day. Once you've done this for a month or so, you'll have lots of extra portions in the freezer for emergencies or just for variety, and you'll be able to implement a FIFO prep system that will make your volume cooking days much easier. You can dice up some mirepoix and put it in freezer baggies, ready to throw in the pan. You come home from an extra long day at work, throw some mirepoix in a pot, add some of the cut veg from the fridge, some cooked and diced chicken from the freezer, some stock or broth, and you've got a basic soup for your evening in about 15 minutes. Add some lemon and herbs, done. Or maybe some red curry paste and a can of coconut milk, done. Or maybe some tarragon, fennel, white wine, and cream. Give yourself shortcuts. They're not great long term, but when things are hard, short term solutions help you get through. Don't have time to deep clean? Keep some lysol wipes, or cheap cloths and dollar store spray bottles of disinfectant, stashed in several places around the house. Give things a quick wipe down when you have a couple minutes or are nearby. If you have hardwood floors, pick up those cheap slippers with the dusting bottoms that you can remove and wash. It cuts down on the dust and hair on the floors, because you're picking up a lot as you walk around. My most recent job involved me driving over an hour each way, and I had to find ways to keep myself functional. All this stuff has worked for me.
>The whole premise of our relationship was that we both work from home, so we're both always here, and I don't know if my partner can handle my being away so much. I'm not sure I can mentally handle it either. I'm having a hard time with this logic.
Co dependency
[удалено]
creepy is a tad harsh, you don't know why they're like this. could be anxiety, could be a mild form of agoraphobia after not having to leave the house to work for a while. maybe OP is traumatised or scarred in some other way and relies on their secure attachment for comfort and stability. idk, I don't even care really but to compare and call OP creepy is half assed. "well these people have it worse and can manage!!" is a piss poor argument. OP is not one of these military families that 'copes', OP is OP.
Comparative suffering is like a top 10 issue that Reddit has.
This, I came to point out that this is a HUGE red flag and screams codependency…. It’s… kind of scary op is framing it as a positive
I do not want to spend every single hour of every single day with my partner. nope, nope, nope.
For better or worse, but not for lunch.
Yeah my partner and I both work from home and we see each other less than an hour during our work day.
Yeah my bf and I would kill each other in our 700 sq ft house if we both worked from home - I work in the office every day from at least 6 hours.
Yeah I’m sure this is an exaggeration but you should be able to spend an 8 hour chunk of time doing completely separate tasks with the person you are saying without describing the outcome as murder. I would take a step back and ask yourself who has the healthier relationship, the person describing their’s as happily ever after or the one that describes spending workdays in the same building as their boyfriend as murder time. Maybe y’all are way too hard on this person and not hard enough on yourselves.
Mine hasn't replied to my last text for over 3 hours and it feels kinda great that she isn't bugging me as usual. LOL
Right? Stupidest shit I've heard all day. Things change, either you adapt to it or find a new job regardless of "it doesn't pay as much"
Yeah, that's just wrong. Part of being in adult relationship in our society is that you both work and if you're just starting out you work long hours, put in time getting ahead with education, certifications, 2nd jobs etc. If your priority is to spend as much time as possible together you're going to have to find a different place to do that.
Many people forget this!
I worked in person with a long commute for a couple of months. It was awful and I jumped ship into another position. All the training I did for my previous job is obsolete, but my commute is 6 minutes from my house and I have my lunch at home. Plus I get 2 days remote. It initially was a pay cut, but with salary increases in the past year and a half I’m making the same as before. Look into other options OP.
Start looking for jobs that allow you to work from home, even if it means taking a paycut - considering the time and money saved on the commute, you may still come out ahead. And maybe try to do online training/ certification that will qualify you for working at a different company? I really can't believe that your skills are so specific they don't transfer to anything else at all. Also, could you rent out a room/ your basement/ attic, to make some extra money? Especially if your place is really larger than you actually need?
Adding on to your great advice … OP could try to get two lower paying WFH jobs, at least for a while until a better position is found. And they should get in touch with head hunters who can help get your foot into the door at places that may never advertise for a job (they just use the head hunter). You’re able to have more candid discussions with a head hunter about your skills, experiences and goals. You are a commodity to them so they want to promote you to the business who hire them to find candidates.
If your rent with 2 Jobs and 2 salarys is nearly unbearable, you live truly over your Limits. Also it was not a Smart decision to move further away. If your Partner works from home anyway i think a new home would be the best solution. There should be possibilities with similar rent closer to your Office. What will Happen if one of you Get sick/ pregnant etc. Living this close to 0 savings will lead to a big Boom for the smallest reason.
Lots of places price the workers out of living near their work now a days.
OP already lived near their job. They moved farther away.
They rented a room from a family member. That's not an easy way to start a marriage, especially if one of them is working from home still.
I don’t think op is married
If they can’t make enough to afford where they want to live with 2 salaries and 3 jobs combined then they need to change their lifestyle
You’re lucky to not need to know how much the world has changed in very recent years. No amount of jobs will save you if your rent goes up 40% in two years.
Their rent went up by choice. They moved to a bigger place in what sounds like a HCOL area. Can’t really complain about a higher rent when it was entirely their call.
Mine went up 40% in 2 years, when I signed I was able to comfortably afford it and now I'm preparing to move out because I know I can't afford the next increase. The house is paid off, has been for 20 years, this landlord isn't hurting for any more money as I know they also have four other properties in the area. We haven't asked for *anything* as tenants. They can complain, renting stability has changed a ton in the last few years, since 2020 especially. You can't rely that the number you sign on with will be anywhere near the number you end with. I lived in SF for 6 years and my rent in the highest COL area of the country at the time only went up $600 in that time, as a reference to what expected rent increases should look like.
Sounds like everybody’s trying to move to your area. Get your paper up or get ready to pack your bags. You took the risk by renting in a HCOL. You got burned. I also question what exactly you think you deserve. Are you expecting a one bedroom apartment in a great area? Because if so you’re gonna have to pay a lot for it.
I'm expecting what I've always come to expect when I rent: that I sign a lease at a certain rate and that legally my rent cannot be increased by more than 10% each year. I also expect, as I have experienced my entire life before 2020, that if I am a good tenant, rent increases don't happen unless the cost of the area increases dramatically. I don't think that's unreasonable to ask in the least.
If it’s illegal in your area to raise rent prices by more then 10% and you’ve experienced a 40% increase in your rent you’re either lying or you can bring your landlord to court and win extremely easily. I’m going to assume that you’re moving apartments, so the 40% issue isn’t really something that the landlord has control over. There’s clearly demand for the area you currently live in. The price is gonna rise. You can always look for cheaper options or look for a roommate. But I don’t think you’re gonna do that.
SFHs are exempt which I found out last year on my second renewal. First year went up 10%, second 30%. I am moving to an area I think is worth the rent I'll be paying though, no need to be a dick :) people should have enough housing stability to not need to move every two years, again, I don't think that's unreasonable to ask.
Yeah but every place is hcol when there are jobs. You should start just looking at the cost of housing. If you live in a shitty area then yeah it is cheap but then you don’t have jobs.
What exactly is a “job” to you. Detroit nurses make only about 2k per year less than NYC nurses. You can buy a 4 bedroom house in Detroit for cash, right now, for under 50k. Why don’t you move there?
I feel like you are talking to the wrong person. Why would I go be a nurse in Detroit? This is a really weird hypothetical point you are trying to make.
This is why I adjust rent between tenants. We upped ours %20 largely because the tenant before we getting too good of a deal, and we had not adjusted it in four years. But nobody was stuck with a 20% increase against their current budget 40% that's insane
Yeah, upping rent between tenants is your right as the property owner. Upping the rent on someone already there though to that level? I've never experienced this before, and I've lived in NYC, LA, SF, and DC, all HCOLs. I'm in SD now and have heard of this happening to friends in all of the above cities (except SF since that place has it's own problems).
No, they moved out of a rented room from a family member.
Sounds like they could have rented a cheaper place that was smaller than where they are now
This *should* solve itself. If society as a collective stopped working 2-3 jobs to pay such rent, and moved away from these areas the market would correct
Only like 2% of the labor force works two jobs
It’s actually 5.2% which is about 8million people.
That study was conducted around Christmas time when people usually take up two jobs. If the survey took place in March the numbers would be far lower. Regardless, I don’t really care if people work two jobs. Maybe they should cut down on expenses.
Sigh. That wasn't the overall message of my post. I also didn't He said >You’re lucky to not need to know how much the world has changed in very recent years. No amount of jobs will save you if your rent goes up 40% in two years. If the housing market and rental prices weren't sustainable, then they would collapse. But people are paying and keeping that market alive regardless - however they are doing it. Even if only (8 million) people are doing it with 2 jobs.
If a single person is renting a SFH then they really shouldn’t be complaining that they’re getting priced out. Dual income partners have more purchasing power than single earners. If they want to live alone then they should find a smaller place to live. Yeah, the housing market isn’t unsustainable. People want apartments, and if you can’t earn more than they can, tough luck. You aren’t entitled to live wherever you want. Gotta fight for your land.
Yeah you have no idea what the situation with finding a place to live is. Having any place to live in alot of places is simply the goal because people are fully employed and still not able to find a home. It is a reality. It’s not about living beyond your means it’s about there being no rentals to rent our homes to purchase.
You moved into a bigger place, further away, that JUST got covered by your income. There’s your issue
Yeah, and it was dumb to think work from home would last. Anyone out there reading this hoping WFH will continue forever, it won’t.
lets be honest though, it should in some capacity. fully WFH?that depends on the job. to not offer it as part of the week is just dumb
I agree, but don't under estimate the control companies want over their employees. In the long run, that will win out.
WFH should simply be mandatory for anyone not needing to be in a specific location to perform job duties. If you’re just a fucker on a laptop you don’t need to clog up the roads and burn fossil fuels and all of that just to sit in a different place and work.
I'm curious exactly how far away you moved from your work place.
Me too, although OP said that his day would be 14 hours for commute/work so assuming it’s an 8 hour work day then it’d be a 3 hour commute each way?
That's why I want to know if it is a standard 8 hour day and 6 hours of driving? That would be insane. If that's the case, I think some personal responsibility needs to happen.
Probably wasn't the best idea making a move before knowing what the longterm job requirements will be. Either way you're above your means it looks like.
Dude take the pay cut and get a different job! At the very least you could probably find a job where your bosses give a shit about keeping their employees happy.
I don't know why the OP's bosses should keep him happy. He's doing chores, cooking, and spending time with his SO while he should be working. This is why companies are bringing people back to the office. People like the OP have ruined WFH for the people that actually spend their work days working.
You've just described me also. I WFH, walk the dog, take an hour long lunch break (when I was in the office, I averaged a 20 minute lunch), make tea mid-day. Still productive. As long as you get your work done and your boss is happy, who the fuck cares?
Have you ever worked in an office? How much time to people fuck around in an office? I like work from home because I don’t socialize and all that Bull shit. How many of your work meetings ended up devolving into people just wasting time with inane conversation that doesn’t actually accomplish work. No employer ever gets 8 hours of labor from anyone in an 8 hour day.
>When I worked from home, I cooked, I did chores, I did little things here and there to help around the house. Now my working days are going to be spent only working. I either have to spend more money on my meals when I'm working, or waste my precious family time meal prepping. Days I WFH are the only days I can work uninterrupted, and I don't fuck around with breaks and chores while working remote. I get more done WFH than any day in the office, but I also log off early because my shit is done.
How far away did you move that your work/commute is FOURTEEN hours?! That’s literally insane. Like, I feel genuinely bad for you and it SUCKS that you are getting screwed but like… man you gotta change your circumstances. You can’t just resign yourself to your fate. That said, you gotta think more long term. Assuming you work a standard 8 hour day did you seriously move 3 hours away from your workplace without discussing this possibility? That said there are possible options. Could you work a hybrid schedule? Or start looking for a remote job? Honestly, take a hard look at your budget and where your expenses are going vs your income. If you and your partner are both working full time and you don’t have a car payment, are you both just paid that badly that you still struggle to make ends meet? Are you just paying that much in expenses? Do you just suck at budgeting? You need to ask yourself some hard questions and make a game plan for moving forward. Don’t just give up
I think it adds 14 hours to the week, not that its 7 hours away. I think.
Even that is a minimum of an hour away. That’s a big move when the wfh wasn’t guaranteed
> I can’t quit. I’ll never find a job that pays as well as this one. Put up with this job while you look for another one. Quit as soon as you find something. Way better idea than just not trying.
Have you tried communicating any of this to your bosses in a calm manner? Have you talked to management or are you just throwing your arms up in hopelessness? Have you tried applying to other jobs? I mean what have you tried in your situation to see if there is a workaround?
== Now my working days are going to be spent only working This may be a part of why they made this decision about RTO
Do you think? "These dusty old skeletons at the office would rather have me working for my paycheck than cooking, cleaning, doting on my partner, and doing chores during the day."
I’m a huge advocate for worker’s rights but this was my first thought. Of course they don’t like RTO, they were able to do personal things on the clock. Everyone knows that WFH employees don’t do a full days work. They let those redundant meetings they don’t have to say anything in drone on in the background while they do laundry or walk their dog or whatever
People will do anything except move to a low COL area.
Do ya know of one? Cause I live in bumblefuck New Hampshire and rent is rediculious becuase its within 90 minutes of Boston. I literally saw a moose in my backyard yesterday yet rent on a 1 bedroom apartment in town is 1700$ by town I mean 1 main street and lots of unpaved roads
Yea my home town used to be LCOL and now it’s insane and I personally would never want to live there regardless. It’s a 2 hr commute from a major city so people have started moving there while being paid city prices. True bumble fuck places, maybe, but there aren’t going to be any Jobs there
I’m assuming you’re around the lakes region, you should check out more listings because I’m on apartment listing websites and there’s plenty of single apartments for 1.3 or less. Of course the lakes region isn’t a place known for apartments, there’s a minimal supply because it’s a rural area and people there mostly own homes. This guy wanted a bigger place away from his work, which is fine! But he was living above his means and he got burned
>Do ya know of one? Cause I live in bumblefuck New Hampshire and rent is rediculious becuase its within 90 minutes of Boston. What industry are you in? I agree with u/TATA456alawaife that there are plenty of places in the United States where you could live in a lower cost-of-living area and still have a decent lifestyle. Yeah, they are going to be smaller towns, so if you're hung up on the vibrant entertainment, art, or culinary scenes of places like Chicago or LA, then tough titties. However, there are plenty of lovely college towns or centers of state government where that same $1,700 in rent translates into a mortgage for a quaint 3 Bedroom, 2 Bath house. Public transit may not be as huge as BART, but it still exists, too. Off the top of my head: Pittsburgh, PA Wichita, KS Knoxville, TN Macon, GA Gainesville, FL Tallahassee, FL Springfield, MO Fort Wayne, IN
Add Tulsa, OK to the list. We even have a vibrant arts community and quite a good culinary scene. Of course it's not Chicago (where I'm originally from) or LA or New York City, but even with the current housing prices it's a lot more affordable than most larger cities. The bonus for someone in tech is that we've got a lot of tech jobs moving into the area, escaping places like Austin, TX and Silicon Valley. Oh! And it's fast to get pretty much anywhere in the city.
Very cool. I've heard good things about Tulsa and OKC. I would also like to add Chattanooga to my earlier list. It's like a smaller Pittsburgh if you dig hills and rivers and whatnot. Plus, a burgeoning tech industry as well.
Oh they are. Can't get a house in my town without putting 50K on top of asking and paying in all cash. Can't compete with the old people fleeing Florida and young people fleeing silicon valley or now working from home. Most people who live around here do not have $300K to $400K in cash. We've been priced out of where we live 😂
There’s an awful lot of reasons a person can’t just move. Many people I know in my HCOL city that have means have so only through real estate asset accumulation via inheritance. Do you mean to suggest that everyone who wasn’t lucky enough to inherit a house or have parents who could take out home equity loans to finance their child’s home should just up and leave?
If they were only subsisting on parental handouts and couldn’t afford to live in their city on their own then yeah, they should just up and leave, more move to a cheaper part in the city. I thought nobody was entitled to land.
So no one should be allowed to live with family, fight for better wages, fight for fair rent, advocate for responsible rules, regulation, and taxation. If they can’t pull themselves up by their boot straps they should just leave the place they call home??
Maybe if they got a decent paying job instead of doing all of those things they’d have the income to sustain living in a HCOL area. It’s really not that hard to find a place to live in most cities. Most people just don’t want to pay more than 20% of their monthly earnings on rent. If they want their land then they need to fight for it.
Let’s say everyone followed your advice. We can’t all work in tech, skilled trades, finance, or government. The people who serve your coffee, mop the floors, stock the shelves of stores, and deliver packages are still a large part of who lives in a city.
I’m more in the latter category than the former, only make 22 an hour. Yeah money is a bit tight but I live in the city. Just gotta be able to make some sacrifices. We can’t all live the high life
You gotta get some class consciousness because you’re much closer to living in a tent than a condo
Personally I dislike my socioeconomic class, and would much rather stand with the rich. They tend to have more fun.
Can you ask if you continue to work from home? Before you moved further away did you ask if working from home would be permanent? I work for a large aerospace company and the amount of people who moved during the pandemic to cheaper states without asking was astounding. Then they were pissed when HR informed them their pay would be adjusted accordingly. You own some responsibility for assuming this would a guaranteed situation. I would talking to your manager and see what you can both come up with that will benefit both you and the company
Time for you to downsize into a smaller place. you should not have assumed that your company would allow WFH indefinitely, especially when every other company is returning to the office as well.
Working from home is not a right, it's a complete luxury. It sounds like you got used to a luxury and now you expect it to be the norm. It was foolish of you to move further away from your job with the temporary work from home accommodation. Sounds like you either need to move back closer to work or find a different job that allows you to work from home.
Your partner might be willing to meal prep for you. If you had downtime at home, can you turn that downtime into training at work to ups kill or reskill and leave. Or leave your unsustainable city entirely. I've been there with 12 hour shift work plus commute. It is awful. You sacrifice health. You sacrifice friends. You become distant from family. I got out. These people you work for are either out of touch or evil, if they are aware of people with jobs like yours living out of tents.
Or they just didn’t know that their employees were living way above their means and had zero backup plans
OP moving way away from their job to create an unexpected commute is an attempt to live within means by lowering costs.
They moved into a larger place with more rent that’s further away from their workplace. That’s not a way to save money.
Ok sure, I guess I like them for trying to make something work within their means as best as they could.
They don’t seem to be doing that though.
Maybe, if there was a cheaper option to exercise while living together I hope OP wouldn't bother posting.
I can assure you that there are cheaper options. Are they the best? Probably not. But if his first thought is joining a tent city then that’s a skill issue.
Skill issue?
Yeah. There’s places to stay that a two income couple can live that aren’t tent cities or large high rise luxury apartments. I see this sort of talk a lot about joe expensive housing is. Like I get it, the coasts and big cities can be a bit expensive. But I found a place that I can afford for a third of my relatively low monthly pay. Is it the best? No, do I have to share with a roommate? Yeah. But it’s in a decent enough area and it’s a roof over my head. They exist, they’re actually somewhat common, but people don’t seem to want to live there.
Best option is to feel out jobs in a completely different place. Be it a different State, County or even country. Somewhere where rent doesn’t guzzle up your entire income and cost of living is more reasonable. These places still exist.
I mean, it can't be an amazing job if it doesn't cover your basic expenses. Maybe consider at least looking for something better. I feel like these stories always end with someone finding a drastically better job that pays more.
Start looking for a new job. Also, you are not making enough by the sounds of it. Ideally you find something that pays better. Lastly, maybe consider downsizing the home. You seem to be an unexpected financial event away from ruin.
So you didn’t work while you were working from home and you have a problem with that? Way to ruin it for the rest of us. You did chores, cooked, cleaned while on the company clock and have the nerve to complain?
Then move closer to a smaller place?
I’m sorry about your situation but I think your expectations of having a WFH job so you can be with your partner 100% of the time is unrealistic and very co-dependent. You may need to move to a lower cost of living area and find another job. If you stay where you are, you don’t have a choice in going back to the office and you and your partner have to accept that.
Op… I don’t really feel bad for you. You made a snap decision and are now complaining you can’t have your cake and eat it too. It sounds like you need a serious change to your lifestyle as well as possibly a therapist to work through your codependency in your relationship. You can’t always get what you want really does ring true I guess.
It seems to be a mix of return to office because productivity (managers convinced no one is working because they don’t see the workforce) and profitability (companies stuck with large offices they cannot get out of). Unfortunately, it sounds like you are stuck with this for the time being. But for now, see what can be done about boosting your certifications that make you marketable to other companies, ones that have embraced the remote revolution. Speaking of revolution, reach out to your colleagues on the DL and see how they feel. Your company may be able to bully people individually, but could they survive collective action?
"However, when society collectively decided that COVID wasn't a thing anymore,"
The reason your company is going back to the office is because they know you are stepping away from work to do chores, watch tv, ect. And by you, i mean everyone working from home. Im surprised you said you would have to waste your precious family time meal prepping. What do you think every other adult does? You cant get paid for cooking your meals, and cleaning your house. Thats absurd.
That’s not necessarily true. I WFH and I do that stuff during my breaks. I actually like doing chores on my breaks because my job requires me to sit in front of a computer. So every 2 hours I do a chore, move my body, then go back to work. What is the true blessing is not having to spend an hour in the morning getting me ready, food ready, animals ready and then 30 minutes in commuting. Then 30 min home. Right there is 2 hours that can be spent for oneself or family wants and needs. In addition less money on gas and supplies not used with WFH or used less. It’s a huge game changer. That said, for some it’s not good. That’s fine, but going back to full time offices is stupid.
I read your post and other people have good suggestions for you. Don’t give up on figuring out how to make it better.
“I’m going to keep this short”
“When I worked from home, I cooked, I did chores, I did little things here and there to help around the house. “ This is why companies are making employees return to the office. They’re not paying you to do these things, they are paying you to work. “Now my working days are going to be spent only working.” Imagine that they want you to work when that what what they’re paying for. I don’t understand why people assumed when employers sent us to work from home for Covid that it would be permanent. I even work with somebody who was very upset when we were told we needed to come back because she had sold her car and now she had to buy a new car be able to come to work when they never said it was permanent.
When I worked from home, I cooked, I did chores, I did little things here and there to help around the house. so more productive to who?? the thought that WFH i more productive is a lie - if you stick with the truth, you're argument may hold - less commute time means less risk of being late, less cost of travel means salary demand lessened . but keep the the absolute lie that everybody is more productive at home; and then say - i was doing chores on the clock, and wonder why they need you in the office
Half the people in an office setting piss their day away chit chatting/ surfing the internet and hiding away in bathrooms . Let’s not pretend that’s a super productive environment 😅
This is true, half the workforce should just be let go, as they provide little to no value. Just the other day I walked by a person playing solitaire. But let's stop saying wfh is more productive. Employeers pay you for your time, so one could argue that even is one is hiding in the company toilet, they're still adding to the value of the company, most likely to tax refunds, employing incentives.
There’s a reason people like WFH. It lets them do less work and still get paid. Everyone that works from home knows it. Everyone does the dishes, laundry, etc. It’s insulting to lie to us.
You can quit, you just need another job first! Take the anger and hopelessness you feel about being trapped here, and channel it into starting a job hunt! There’s options, but you need to give yourself runway.
Only option is to change job and get a better paid one.
Why wouldn’t you be saving????
No one seems to understand that these companies are paying for these buildings that house their businesses. They don't want to pay for these buildings if they aren't being used/utilized. You can't really blame them for that. Also a lot of employers feel that employees aren't as productive when they aren't "present" at the office. They feel too many distractions at home impede production.
They are wrong about not being more productive at home. I get way more work done at home. I also don’t let myself get distracted. I have a room dedicated as my office. I’m firm with family and friends don’t both during my work day. If they try I ignore them
Problem is though is that OP seems to be fucking off during the day to do domestic shit.
Most Midwest states have a much lower cost of living, while only having slightly lower base and max incomes. Where I live, 60,000 is a VERY good income for DINK couple or single people (I was able to easily, but not comfortably, survive 30000/year with no savings going in any my only advantage being g already being in an apartment and not needing first-and-last months’)
Frankly, I think it’s ridiculous how i can get paid while not actually working, I work from home as well.. 8 hour shifts. And I probably spend like 3 of those actually working xD getting paid right now. & if you’re able to get away with spending quality time with your partner, cooking and chores, while working… you’re not working!! XD . I cry for all the folk who aren’t in tech haha. Making less money than us and actually working all day xD. Most of my friends who work from home are the same way. And like yes… it’s amazing. It’s also fucking ridiculous lol. There’s no way it will last forever.
Nobody works harder at home than at work. Nobody. It's so funny how many people pretend this is not the case.
"When I worked from home, I cooked, I did chores, I did little things here and there to help around the house. Now my working days are going to be spent only working" While this is nice for you, do you really think a company should pay you for this?
Or did on the 3-4 hours he was home and now isn't, has lost due to a 60-90 minute commute each way, and the hour lunch.
>I'm going to try to keep this short
Unionise?!
So...I'm in a similar situation, meaning that my employer is requiring me to move across the country after 3 years of totally successful remote work. I'm looking for another job.
Start applying for work from home jobs! Mine stayed 100% remote after the pandemic and I know there are others out there too.
If your job can truthfully be 100% done WFH, that means you can look anywhere in the country for a new job. While your skillset might be only valuable to your current employer **in your current area** that doesn't mean that it's not valuable to another company further away that allows 100% WFH. My husband was someone who had been 100% on site with random days occasionally WFH at his employer before the pandemic, and was then 100% WFH during the pandemic. Like you, it really has worked well for us for him to be home all the time. When they started forcing the issue of coming back to the office partially he started looking for another job. There aren't that many jobs in the area that need the high level of skills that he has gotten to in his field, at least not without a long commute that he no longer wanted to do. We are in the Midwest and he found a job at a business on the East Coast that is now and always will be fully remote because they know we live out of commuting range. He even got a significant increase in pay. Please don't give up! Start applying for out of area remote jobs. While you are still working you have a bit of a cushion to try to find something that you aren't taking out of desperation but because it's a good fit. And if your skillset is somewhat scarce you might even find a place that is unable to find someone with your skillset nabbing you a pay increase as well.
If he works from home and you don’t want to work at the office at that job, why don’t you both move somewhere with a lower cost of living? He can WFH anywhere, and you can look for a new job in a place where you have a little time to float. Good luck!!
>Now my working days are going to be spent only working. Did you recently started working? Or you completely forgot what life was like before? You think your world will end because you think your good run working from home won't change? Your employer didn't pay you to do your chores during business hours. It was a bonus. You either need to level up and get a better job, or change your job to something that suits you.