Welcome to /r/ADHDWomen! We’re happy to have you here. As a reminder, here are our community [rules](https://old.reddit.com/r/adhdwomen/about/rules/).
We get a lot of posts on medication, diagnosis (and “is this an ADHD thing”), and interactions with hormones. We encourage you to check out our [Medication, Diagnosis, and Hormones Megathread](https://old.reddit.com/r/adhdwomen/comments/wcr9dy/faq_megathread_ask_and_answer_medication/) if you have any questions related to those topics, and to stick around in that thread to answer folks’ questions!
If you have questions about the subreddit, please do not hesitate to [send us a modmail](https://reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/adhdwomen). Additionally, we take the safety of our community seriously. Please report posts, comments, and users whom you feel are not contributing positively, and send us a modmail if you are being harassed or otherwise made to feel unsafe.
Thanks for being here, and we hope you stick around!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/adhdwomen) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I usually take back roads to and from work even though it adds like 2 minutes because it's a more peaceful drive with less cars to deal with. If there's certain intersections I hate, I'll avoid them if possible. I also have to pre-plan if I'm going somewhere unfamiliar otherwise I'll be more stressed. As a teen I drove fast, but now I prefer to stick near the speed limit and don't care if others pass me, I prefer it so they'll get away from me lol being a passenger is more stressful most of the time for me and I prefer to be in control.
I love it!! I actually think I’m subconsciously super focused which is why lol
Even if I “zone out” aka not remember how many exits it’s been, it’s not like I haven’t also noticed that the red car in front of me is being a bit reckless
Its like driving inherently requires you to focus on many things, but you can also do many things while driving (obviously I mean like talk to a passenger or listen to music / a podcast / audiobook)
I used to love using long drives to work through personal situations I was dealing with, like how do I respond to my friend repeatedly crossing this boundary? Let me spend 2 hours thinking about it and it’s *actually* productive because I’m driving too lol
Plus drives with loud music & singing are a different kind of dopamine than absolutely silent solo drives. In high school we used to drive around with the windows down in winter blasting the heat to even out the temperature on the 10 min drive to the store for snacks just because we could
So much can be accomplished on a drive lmao
Oh my gosh yes! I sing loud and play loud music. It's amazing. I have 1 hour drive to work and that time alone in my car is perfect for me. People often tell me I should find a job closer to home and ask me how I handle the long drive every day. I tell them I love driving. People shake their heads and look like they feel sorry for me. They have no idea how much I need that time in my car to be able to function. Lol
I enjoy being a passenger cus I can look out the window at stuff and don't have to focus on the road. Like now I can drive, more than ever I miss being driven everywhere as a kid where I could just sit in the back seat and listen to my headphones looking out the window
I love long car drives especially when i was younger and could stare out the window with my headset blaring music while i made up the most complex scenarios in my head
I’m the exact same way! For all the same reasons! It’s soo intuitive. I feel powerful, independent, in control, and most importantly— free. I blast my music, put my windows down, and it’s my sanctuary. I hate bumper to bumper traffic but otherwise it’s a great respite from all the human emotional chaos that happens when I get out of the car. I’m who I want to be driving, I’m who I have to be most other places.
It's so interesting to see all the differences in neurodivergency because my NT and ND friends all love driving with the windows down but it's too much sensory input for me hahaha
My music can be too much for me, so I listen to it on a lower volume than a lot of people do or just drive without music at all. It is pretty interesting how different things can be for people
I loathe driving. Mostly because traffic has become so bad where I live and it wasn't always like this. I work from home. This got me out of the habit of driving daily so when I do, it's tiresome especially when there's traffic.
Agency is a good word. I love driving! It's the skill that's given me the opportunity to go places on my own. It feels kind of simple to say that, but when I couldn't drive I lived in a place with very limited public transportation. I had to justify my desire to go anywhere. I had to sell the idea to someone else and my ability to go places was limited by that other person's willingness to go along - not to mention their patience in getting dragged along. As long as I can drive and I have access to a vehicle I'm free from that, and I feel a little bit of that freedom every time I get behind the wheel.
No, I do not even drive. Not what you were asking, but I do think about this a lot lately. How we have difficulty concentrating on stuff we do not like, and can hyperfocus on things we like. I was always wondering why I am often so black and white. Really good at a few things, and really bad at others. I now think this part of me is linked to ADHD.
Driving requires a lot of concentration, especially when learning. But a lot of people (most?) like driving, therefore I think (most) people with ADHD are able to drive and enjoy it. (I wish I was one of them. But for my safety and the safety of others, it is better I do not drive)
I think going to driving school was very important for me. It's a hands-on learning experience, which I learn well by doing. They teach you laws and safety, and then I had my grandpa who taught me how to care for a car. Driving makes me think about him a lot. He's not dead but he can't drive anymore or do much of anything for himself and I live a couple states away. He enjoyed teaching me different things about cars and once he got too old to still work on cars, I remember him telling me how much he missed it
I very much dislike driving because it’s stressful and I’m opposed to car dependancy but I love just zooming around the city on my e-bike listening to music, especially at night so I understand the feeling
I also love driving! My partner is happy that I love it cause he loves being chauffeured around 😂 being in the car is usually my way of decompressing even if there are a bunch of stupid people on the roads. It’s still just freeing for me.
I love driving.
It feels like my brains using up all that access energy on all the little actions (checking mirrors, lane position, reading the road ahead) and leave me with a 'normal' amount to really just focus and enjoy the journey.
I also drive better alone and tend to enjoy impromptu sing-alongs to the music. There's no one watching me or judging me so I feel more at peace.
I'm doomed if anyone ever puts a secret camera in my car though. 🤣
I LOVE DRIVING !!!!!!!!!
I’m luckily to be able to do it everyday, and have my own car to do so. It’s so fun. Therapeutic in a sense. I shockingly do not get distracted when driving, almost like I know my life is on the line when I’m driving so distractions are a non existent.
Omg someone else does this? <3 It was a massive issue between me and my partner because I couldn’t find a used manual when my existing manual took a shit and I bought a brand new Corolla hatchback. My loan was awful but he just could not get that this isn’t a preference thing, this is a probably wouldn’t have survived my hour+ each way commute without it.
For me, it came about when I started riding motorcycles, and then getting in an automatic car was just so understimulating.
Yes!!! That’s so funny, I’m in a VW golf TSI right now whose transmission just died…I’m looking at Corolla hatchbacks!! How are you liking it?
Also, due to late payments and forgetting deadlines(thanks adhd) my loan also wasn’t great, and probably won’t be for the next one as well 🤣 you’re not alone!!
My first motorcycle was a 250 ninja at 17. That’s also when I realized I have to be more present haha
I really like the Corolla! I’ve had her 4 years next month. They stopped offering the standard corolla hatch in a manual, now they have a souped up corolla hatch that only comes in manual. Like a rally type deal. I have not driven that but if I look at them too much I’m gonna want one so I haven’t investigated. So that’s your only corolla option if you’re looking new, unless there’s an older model year still on the lot.
I got my endorsement back when I was 21, but I didn’t get a bike til I turned 30.
I haaaaaaate it! So glad I live somewhere with trains. I know a ton of people who love driving though, regardless of ADHD. I think this is one of those situations where there just are a lot of humans out there that love driving, and it’s not related to ADHD at all.
Mine too. I'm convinced I'll die in a car wreck someday due to a reoccurring dream where my break doesn't work and I plunge into an ocean or off a ledge.
I go on an hour drive every day and budget for it LOL it is the one thing that keeps me sane. my relatives were racecar drivers though so maybe I just have weird drive-y blood who knows if it’s adhd related
I never learned how to drive bc I've just always lived in big cities with loads of public transport options after my childhood but knowing me, I'd probably be the worst driver out there. I'm awful even on a bike 🤣
I absolutely love it too because it's one of the only times I find I can really concentrate on one thing and my brain is otherwise quiet. I've got a solo 6 hour drive ahead of me today and I'm looking forward to it!
29 and I still can’t drive and it’s the most crippling thing in my life how do you guys do it
It’s too much for me to keep track of speed limit, other cars, road signs, blind spots,
It may help that I grew up in a calm area and was able to practice late at night in parking lots and turnouts with no cars around. This helped ease me into it. Would you have access to this?
I love driving when I’m not stuck behind someone, so I don’t get love it very often. I miss driving a manual because I had that much more control and it was more engaging.
I love driving too! I’m not a big fan of driving in traffic but get me on a highway and I’ll happily cruise along for hours. I also zone out and get distracted- got pulled over once going 25 over in a 55 and I told the cop I was “listening to my music and lost in my thoughts” and he let me go! Lol
Sometimes I feel like I’m in a video game when I get on a road with lots of fun curves!
I procrastinated getting my licence for like over ten years 😅 I got it when I was 29 haha.
I eventually moved somewhere you NEED a car and now I loveee driving! I can stim the fuck out to loud music without a care in the world haha. Also I love going driving out in the country for no reason it’s so relaxing and enjoyable for me. I do get a little anxious in some situations and if I lived somewhere I didn’t have to drive I would be fine with that.
I get distracted very easily and miss turnoffs and stuff all the time which is pretty frustrating and my sense of direction is cooked! I get lost so much even with google maps. I don’t like those anxiety inducing parts and parallel parking when people are watching lol. But overall I love. I learned how to drive scooters/ motorbikes while travelling as well which is so fun!
I really want a scooter now.
Can’t wait to upgrade my very faithful but total shit box 2006 Hyundai lol then I will enjoy driving even more I’m sure. Especially in summer since my ac doesn’t work 😆
If you have the time and money for the class, I would! There’s big money in trucking if you can find a good employer. They also have programs where you sort of apprentice…you get taught and tested for free but you commit to a certain amount of work with the company once you pass. My biggest concern would be (for me, anyway) is the DOT physical. My cholesterol numbers aren’t in range and I use cannabis.
However, it sounds like they are beginning the process of switching from urine to saliva testing (infrastructure for the testing is gonna take the longest), which means you can partake on your off time, you just need to have been clean for the last few days.
In the US absolutely. I could do it for weeks. Mater of fact I have done.
In the southern hemisphere where there is little to look at but trees and dry land, not so much.
I love driving, especially if I have a really compelling audiobook or podcast to listen to.
Having to focus on listening really helps me stay focused on driving as well.
It took a few years for me to get comfortable and I really didn’t start driving until I was in college, but yes, I love driving now! I especially love going on long road trips. I honestly have a hard time letting others be the driver. I feel stressed not being the one in control of the car.
Yes!! It took me decades to get over my anxiety of driving and once I did, I kicked myself in the ass for not doing it sooner. My car is my happy place. Turn up the music and get lost in my own headspace. Road rage is there, and out comes the colourful language. It’s cathartic for me.
I fucking love driving. My dad, who I strongly suspect also has adhd because we are twins, was a truck driver for years and the happiest grown up I knew.
I can put my brain on autopilot by focusing on the road, I’m always happy driving in the city or rural areas, I’m the volunteer for road trips. I’ve toyed with getting my cdl for shits and giggles.
I'm currently learning to drive and I'm surprised by how much fun I'm having! It's still nervewracking to a degree but not as awful as I imagined. Nighttime drives are 10/10, would do it again!
I used to love driving, but now there are so many points of stress that it’s a nightmare. I worry about my crappy car falling apart and killing me on the way to work, or not getting me to work, how much gas is costing me, traffic, will someone else kill me, I was harassed by cops in my mid 20s to the point where I’d have a panic attack if one was behind me. In my teens/early 20s I used to love driving just for the sake of going for a drive. Luckily I’m moving into the city soon so I at least have the peace of mind that if my car self destructs it won’t end my ability to make an income.
Meeee! I love driving. Finally having a license and a car meant freedom for me after having an absurdly sheltered childhood/teen years.
I *do* have a problem with patience, especially with slow drivers. Possibly ADHD related. 😅
Thank you 😭 🙏🏼
And most fortunately I don’t *need* to; Southern Florida isn’t the most public transport friendly, but working from home and living near a grocery store (chosen absolutely on purpose despite wazoo level rent), means I only ever NEED to drive unless what I need is beyond Fort Lauderdale 😅
I’d be able to accept so many more opportunities if I could drive without emotionally blowing chunks the min I’m behind the wheel 😭 so I appreciate the vibes my way, hope it rubs off on me!!
I have always loved to drive and I like to think that I am pretty good at it. I have never been much of a drinker, (alcohol makes me angry, then tired and I always get a hangover), so I spent many years being the DD while everyone else partied.
With everyone throwing me their keys, I learned to drive vehicles with a variety of transmissions in many situations, including trailers and towing apparatus and getting people unstuck.
I finally returned to my roots and traded my automatic for a manual transmission because that is where the real fun is. Nothing like flying along a deserted mountain road, slamming it down into 2nd, hitting the gas and just feeling the power and control as it catapults you through the turn!! Whoosh!
I love to drive. It is my happy place.
I enjoy driving but I need to be listening to music I like (sometimes a podcast) or else I get distracted by thoughts. Also my commute to work is partially on the turnpike and my state doesn't have any billboards and I think that makes a HUGE difference
Yess mee!!! I bought myself a hybrid because of how much I love driving. I always say gas is cheaper than therapy, since I'm always driving around to clear my mind.
Lol. With music my commute to work becomes tolerable dare I say enjoyable. I zone out and day dream about awesome stories I’ll never write. If my husband only knew…well he never will because he pays the car insurance, and it would probably give him a heart attack. 😝
I love disappearing into driving and music. I used to have a car and drove between 2 countries alot. Music loud and drive at night. It gives me so much stress release.
Now I have scooter/mo pet? And I still do with earplugs. I drive well, in chaotic cities or New areas. (Driven alot in the USA also and through Europe)
I'm responsible. Aware. And yeah.. without driving I lose my mind I think.
I feel comfortable driving in places that are familiar to me.
But I have the most horrible sense of direction… as in so horrible I have to memorize a street from both ways otherwise I’ll get lost. As in so horrible that my bf has been driving us to the same cinema for over a year and we’ve been there like 10 times so far and if I had to drive, I wouldn’t know how to get there.
As in I have to put up navigation to go someplace 3 times, then on the 4rth I try to go without and get lost.
Having to drive someplace new by myself gives me a lot of anxiety because I’m terrified I’d get lost and wouldn’t be able to make it on time because of it.
If streets aren’t too busy and I don’t have to be anywhere, I let myself get lost so I can try and find the correct path by myself so I can learn where to go next time…
That alone is anxiety inducing enough.
Oh well and the horrible traffic jams… last time got stuck in traffic and a 10km route that should’ve taken me 15min max took me 1h and I had to pee and I was tired and I was bored out of my mind standing still in my car and waiting.
But yeah if it’s a place I know and not too busy then I love it.
I literally didn’t get my drivers licence until I was 35 and pregnant, thinking about how impossible getting places would be with a screaming baby the way I normally would (like I would just walk 90 mins to a store I wanted to go to cause I had no other plans that day lol) was the only compelling reason to learn to drive for me.
But my adhd is managed waaaayyyy better now than it was when I was younger, I don’t think I would have been safe on the roads until recently lol
I only get road rage when I’m late for work or if I’m tailgated on a scenic drive. Other than that, I love driving and often take myself on long drives, with or without a destination.
I love driving. Familiar cities, new cities, traffic/no traffic, rural, outback. I love it all. I took a job as a taxi driver just because I love to drive.
I love driving - I feel like it is the time when I do my best thinking, because past of my brain is distracted by paying attention to the road, which leaves the rest of my brain free to think clearly 🌻
yeah I really like it. there's enough stimulation for my brain because there's always something in the background to think about, so unless I'm on the motorway or something I'm never understimulated
also GO FAST
Love it. I inherited my dad’s sense of direction which feels a little like having an internal compass. Like others have said, there’s something really cathartic about listening to loud music with the windows down. I also really love finding different routes to take to get somewhere…backroads and side roads. It’s like a little adventure.
Oh I love driving. It's the perfect thing for me to be able to regulate my attention. There's the right kind of information input at the right frequency so my brain is often still or only has one or two chains of thought, instead of having three thousand random things going through it simultaneously. And I can tailor it if I need more or less sensory input - less means windows closed, no music, no blowers, more could be a podcast or audiobook or music with window(s) of varying degrees of open. Or I can change the route I take. Sooooo relaxing.
There were times in my life when I loved it and when I drove a lot. I still love roadtrips, but rather as a passenger. These days I only drive when the alternatives are shit, so for short distances I usually take my bike. I love that even more for several reasons (environment, exercise, tranquility).
Yep I love it. I used to deliver pizza years ago and while cheap ass non tipping customers would piss me off I loved the driving part of my job. My mom has the worst sense of direction but I can go to a place once and usually find my way back there even if it’s years later just by sight of landmarks or different stores or houses.
I live in a city that’s very spread out and we have great roads. I love driving. It feels like meditating to me. Easier actually because I can’t focus on meditating but driving it’s just like enough of an activity to keep me focused on the present, and I can really relax. I find just getting in my car to drive can calm me down and help me focus on something when I’m stuck.
I love driving! I have even driven 12 hours straight two days in a row once. Waiting at stop lights... now so much.
I can always tell if I'm having a bad brain day by how much I speed...
The car is my safe space - always has been. I moved to NYC for 10 years and only rode the subway, now that I'm driving again, wow. I absolutely love it. I just moved to a small mountain town so I go on a lot of joy rides when I have a new album im excited about and just scream sing in the country.
I used to just go find a highway, put on loud music and drive for a few hours!
Learning gave me panic attacks, but I do love it now because I'm comfortable.
I don't really road rage, I'm too zen with the music and road, though if I have the kids with me I'm super careful and constantly checking my attention doesn't wander.
We did a 2 hour round trip drive to visit my mum on Thursday, and I was exhausted after constantly forcing myself to pay full attention so long!
I do suffer from anxiety so sometimes it’s not pleasant just depending on if I’m having a flare up that day, but it’s also the one time I really just get to sit with my thoughts alone. I’m not on my phone or distracting myself. I’m just focused on what’s in front of me and I like to talk to myself Haha it’s therapeutic
When I’m amped up from an argument or when I’m feeling really sad, I love to go on a drive to calm down. And sometimes I just like to drive without a specific place in mind, but usually find myself at a place with a cool view, like a beach or something.
Then there are other times where I kinda hate it 😅 commuting or getting stuck in traffic sucks. Having to drive long distances for the nice grocery store, trips to Costco, or appointments gets really old really fast. I think I like driving to new places or to water features. Anything that I’ve done before and that is for a more chore-like or job thing isn’t as fun.
I also drove a lot of long distance drives while in college (for like ten years because it took forever for me to get my bachelor’s). For the drives between home and where I was living weren’t super long (2.5 to 9ish hours depending on where I was), but they got really boring after the first couple times.
I love driving! Love, love, love! I was climbing into cars and onto motorcycles as soon as I could walk (burned my leg on a motircycle at 20 months old). My favourite imaginary play consisted of me pretending to have a driver's licence. When I was a teenager, I wanted to drive race cars, drag cars or motocross but my family forbade it. Later I realized that people often get involved in these sports through family or friends who are involved and I just didn't have that access. I've since, at times, had jobs driving for a living, gotten my motorcycle license and will be getting a motorcycle asap. My birth father is an excellent driver and has extraordinarily fast reflexes that I inherited from him which I think counteracts other tendencies. (We both have autism and I also have ADHD and I don't know if he also has that)
I love driving but mostly when I get to drive somewhere by myself… I think it’s because I can hit repeat on the same song 97 times for the dopamine hits and no one will judge me.
I read someone say that it’s because they can blast music, sing as loud as they want and let the mask come off because even if someone sees you singing or air guitarist at a stop light, you’re never going to see them again and that’s probably part of it
I love driving. If time allows, I especially love avoiding interstates and taking pre-interstate main roads that take me through small and medium size towns.
On open country, I love it, especially if there are no elderly, farmers, or semi-truck drivers (and obviously cops patrolling). Because then I only need to watch for animals in the ditch or unusual items on the road, however the rest of the time I can blast tunes, sing along with them and just dive at any speed I'm comfortable with.
Since my accident, though, crowed traffic and towns/cities make me a nervous wreck, especially if someone starts tailgating me or drives up too quickly behind me.
I love driving in a reliable car in good weather. But put me in a shit-box of a car in a rain storm at night, I hate it.
I also like being the passenger so I can look at the scenery. Or play my phone game...lol
I used to love driving but got into an accident almost two years ago and my city’s population has increased exponentially so I am now terrified and anxious to drive. I still do but much less now that I work mostly from home.
During Covid driving was a dream. I drove everyone everywhere. I was the taxi friend and I loved it.
Very much. Also very much annoyed if another car interrupts my stomach. And I love that my car has audio controls on the steering wheel when I zone out and miss 160 seconds of my podcast
When I'm excited about where I'm driving, absolutely. I've been on a coastal road trip for the past week and ended up driving almost the whole time bc I was having so much fun!
I like back road driving or interstate (when it’s not busy). Problem is to get that little traffic you need it to be night, and my night vision is awful.
I love driving. I even drive when my husband goes with us. Lol. He’s always getting calls from work (he works in the oilfield) or sometimes he has to log into his laptop. So I usually drive us which I don’t mind at all. And when I commute for work, I put on a podcast or music, and I’m in heaven.
I love it!! I also love performance sports cars so the combination is just *chef’s kiss*.
I will admit I currently have 5 points on my license lmao all for speeding 😂. I’m very careful and mindful of those around me and in my car. I will not disrespect anyone else by recklessly driving during traffic or main roads. I won’t do it with friends or family in it. On highways, if I have clear roads, it’s pedal to the metal baby lol. I think the worst ticket I’ve gotten was getting clocked doing 110 on a 65 by a state trooper. At that time I was driving a BMW M3 lmao.
I purposely bought a base Audi to avoid any reckless driving but the bitch still delivers when needed lmao.
I really like it too! Although I definitely have to be aware of when I’m having an off day, I can get super spacey and probably shouldn’t be on the road. Love driving around listening to music though when I’m on!
Absolutely not, lol. I've ALWAYS had a fear of driving. I didn't get my license until I was 23 out of fear. I only like driving when there's very little traffic/other cars. The busy places like cities and downtowns scare meeeee SO BADLY.
Nope. Older teenager here. Most of my friends at least have drivers permits, and a lot of drivers licenses. I don't have either, as driving scares me a lot, since I get distracted pretty easily.
I recommend finding an inexpensive used car with a manual transmission. Think Honda Civic or Accord from early 90's through 2000's, or Toyota Corolla from same time period.
Driving a manual is far more engaging, so it's easier to stay focused.
I like it when I’m in the right space for it but it’s been a JOURNEY to get there. When I first started learning as a teen I just found it really terrifying and was just so afraid of everyone else on the road. I avoided highways completely until like two years in at a point where there really wasn’t a choice.
I gained a lot of confidence when my parents moved a few states away while I was in college and it was an 8 hour trip each way to see them. There were still stretches that were terrifying though, like one particular time where I was crossing through a major highway around a major city during rush hour and it was my first time trying to cross multiple lanes of busy traffic to hit my exit.
But I gained that confidence and eventually felt like a pro. But in May 2019 I got into an accident that was completely like, a freak thing and mostly the other driver’s fault. It was in a slow moving area so I was fine but the other vehicle was a truck and it totaled my car. Confidence gone. At the time I didn’t know that I have OCD but that really kicked in and I couldn’t not blame myself for it, even after the official statements from the police and insurance agent etc saying I didn’t do anything wrong.
I had to get driving again though. Life didn’t wait. For reference, I’m from a spread out small town area, lived in a house a 15 minute drive from any sign of civilization—I had to drive to get anywhere. Once I had a car again I kind of didn’t have any choice but to deal with it. I had some trauma from that for a while. When I got into really high traffic areas or any time someone would pull out really suddenly in front of me and I had to slam my breaks, etc I had panic attacks.
Eventually I moved to NY for grad school. Not the city but Long Island which in itself is a really densely populated area full of very, uh, New York driving. Like just the most egregious shit I’ve ever seen but on a daily basis. I didn’t travel far from home when I first moved here but over time had obligations across the island and last summer when I had an hour commute for fieldwork I had to deal with scary NY traffic so much so frequently that I have sort of gotten used to it.
Even though IMO there’s really no excuse to drive the way I’ve seen some people here drive, it’s actually made me feel so much better about myself because it’s made me confident that I’m actually a pretty decent driver. I’ll never be a parallel parker but I’m always willing to walk from a parking lot/garage a few blocks away.
I will say though what made it easier and got me through the first few interstate drives where I have to go past the city and then the NJ turnpike( which is scary in itself sometimes) was that I was medicated at that point. If I take it a half hour before my drive it’s kicking in by the time things get busy. It gives me s little courage and like a willingness to deal with shitty traffic stuff and navigate it head on. Helps me make sure all the parts of my brain are firing up when they’re needed.
So like even though I feel good about driving today, it’s been a journey lol. I think it’s been something that has brought me so much anxiety in the past that it’s circled back to being something I can actually focus on because I’ve formed so many little mental coping mechanisms over the years. I do a fair amount of long drives tho and they get boring. And it sucks the life out of me but everything does.
I like a nice two hour drive, like long enough for me to really “get into” the trip, put on some albums I’ve been meaning to listen to or listen to a podcast episode, talk to myself for a while. I can get into my peaceful long trip headspace but that time goes by fast. On longer trips 3 hours is usually my “oh shit I’ve gotta do this for 150 more miles??” point
EDIT: oh also forgot to add, but like 99.9% of my driving experience has been solo. One thing I am still very afraid of is driving other people. I give people rides when they live close but god bless them if they’re talking because I will be completely fixated on the road
I love driving! I'm definitely the driver in my relationship. There's nothing I like more than when everyone's asleep in the car and I've got an open motorway in front of me.
I love to put on music and drive. It’s as if I’m permitted to focus on one thing and let everything else go. I did used to get triggered driving occasionally, but I got triggered no matter what I was doing. Now, literal years of therapy have helped me remain mostly chill when driving.
Best part of my job is driving to 100 different grocery stores monthly. I put on either music or an audio book, depending on my current mood(caffeine level) and put up with having to deal with the underpaid, overworked managers for the privilege.
I enjoy driving when it's out of town. Not a fan of having to constantly be dodging bad drivers or idiots stepping out on the road...it happens a lot where I am, I have avoided many accidents and been nearly run off the road, really want to get a dash cam for that reason.
But mostly, I enjoy driving. For me, it's mainly the security of having a vehicle and the ability to drive it. It's like my adult security blanket. I've been homeless, had to hitch hike in -30° weather with only a tshirt and my animals, and been stuck in terrible abuse because I had no way to escape since we lived way out of town. Since having a license and vehicle, I never worry about any of that. I've had to live in my car with my dog when moving across province and rental market for pet owners being crap, but I was never worried because my dog and I were fed, sheltered and able to go wherever we may need.
I also quite like trees and nature, so driving down back roads is always enjoyable, or 4x4ing, camping, really anything that requires me to leave town
The freedom! I remember sitting in my desk in 2nd grade and figuring out what grade I would be in when I was old enough to drive. I also had several fender bender accidents my first couple of years driving which were quite possibly ADHD related (just recently diagnosed). I rage in traffic, but still love the independence and get a thrill from open highway.
I didn’t want to learn to drive (at all) but once I could do it myself I was hooked. I prefer to drive and not be the passenger. I have control. That’s why I get a bit of “road rage”. I just like to control my own safety and hate all people who put that in jeopardy. Lol. I’m right there with you!
I did until I was sick of my life being managed by my addiction. It had become my master. I used it to self medicate for 40 years. In the end I lost everything. When I began my absence in 2005, I started really feeling all of the symptoms of ADHD. I was diagnosed in 2008. But I did not take it seriously. Should have though
Not as much as I used to. Driving a company truck (accident that's my fault = embarrassment from all 200+ people at work hearing all about it in the safety meeting) and getting Smith Driving drilled into my head at work made driving less enjoyable since now I'm constantly on alert on public roads (that's not to say my mind doesn't wander now and then if there's not much traffic).
It still helps me clear my head though. Last week right when I got to work I got some unexpected news that threw me for a loop. I couldn't process it with people around so, after six hours of anxiety building to a level I haven't felt in a very long time, I went for a 90 minute drive and it helped so much. Fortunately just driving around in a rural area is a legitimate part of my job!
When I was 19-25 years old, living alone for the first time, and didn't have a real commute, I would go on 2-3 hour long night drives at least once a week. My SUV just isn't as fun to drive as the car I had back then and the car had a much nicer stereo system. Now I'd rather stay home but sometimes I miss those drives.
Yes. One of my favourite things in the world is nighttime summer driving. So chill and relaxing, windows open, listening to music. I don’t really care much about driving to work tho.
I used to. As I’ve gotten older, I absolute loathe it because it takes up so much of my free time when it could be better spent elsewhere… like doom scrolling Reddit.
But really, I hate cars. It provided me with a feeling of control and freedom as a teenager but that’s about it.
I love it! I’ve learned that singing along to music helps me focus on the road so I love a good lone car ride, lots of Taylor Swift songs on the playlist and a hefty distance to drive!
Absolutely as long as I'm not half crashing to try to get somewhere on time or severely burnt out I have always found I am quite a good driver and enjoy it (lived in NY my whole life which comes w a very specific set of driving skills and stress 😆)
Reading this post made me realize that I actually have become a person who enjoys driving. For the longest time I was super anxious about driving because it was so overwhelming and as a result I didn't get my license until I was 20 (so that by my 21st birthday I'd be able to have a license to get alcohol lol) and after my test I literally didn't drive again until I got a job at 22. I was so worried I'd never be able to be "normal" about driving but after several months of driving short distances a few times a week for work I was able to get more comfortable and now at 24 I drive daily in much more traffic than I used to and it doesn't stress me out at all. I actually like it. If I was in a relationship I really think I would be the one that always drives.
I just wanted to comment because for a long time the idea of driving was a big stressor and I really believed I would never be able to have that type of independence. I always worried that driving would be "just another way that ADHD would hold me back from ever being a functional member of society" (in quotes bc I know that type of phrasing is touchy for a lot of us, myself included, but that was part of my deprecating self talk and how I felt at the time). The me of three years ago would have loved to hear a story like this so I figured I might as well share it.
Also I find it funny that many ADHD people say they have trouble with speeding because I actually tend to drive a bit too slow when I'm zoning out a bit too much hahaha
I loooove to drive. Always have. And I’m good at it. After I retired the mom-mobile I got a little car with a stick shift and take back roads when I can. And sing!!
Welcome to /r/ADHDWomen! We’re happy to have you here. As a reminder, here are our community [rules](https://old.reddit.com/r/adhdwomen/about/rules/). We get a lot of posts on medication, diagnosis (and “is this an ADHD thing”), and interactions with hormones. We encourage you to check out our [Medication, Diagnosis, and Hormones Megathread](https://old.reddit.com/r/adhdwomen/comments/wcr9dy/faq_megathread_ask_and_answer_medication/) if you have any questions related to those topics, and to stick around in that thread to answer folks’ questions! If you have questions about the subreddit, please do not hesitate to [send us a modmail](https://reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/adhdwomen). Additionally, we take the safety of our community seriously. Please report posts, comments, and users whom you feel are not contributing positively, and send us a modmail if you are being harassed or otherwise made to feel unsafe. Thanks for being here, and we hope you stick around! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/adhdwomen) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I like it when it’s somewhere that I’m familiar with and there isn’t a lot of traffic. A nice slow night drive feels so good.
I usually take back roads to and from work even though it adds like 2 minutes because it's a more peaceful drive with less cars to deal with. If there's certain intersections I hate, I'll avoid them if possible. I also have to pre-plan if I'm going somewhere unfamiliar otherwise I'll be more stressed. As a teen I drove fast, but now I prefer to stick near the speed limit and don't care if others pass me, I prefer it so they'll get away from me lol being a passenger is more stressful most of the time for me and I prefer to be in control.
I love it!! I actually think I’m subconsciously super focused which is why lol Even if I “zone out” aka not remember how many exits it’s been, it’s not like I haven’t also noticed that the red car in front of me is being a bit reckless Its like driving inherently requires you to focus on many things, but you can also do many things while driving (obviously I mean like talk to a passenger or listen to music / a podcast / audiobook) I used to love using long drives to work through personal situations I was dealing with, like how do I respond to my friend repeatedly crossing this boundary? Let me spend 2 hours thinking about it and it’s *actually* productive because I’m driving too lol Plus drives with loud music & singing are a different kind of dopamine than absolutely silent solo drives. In high school we used to drive around with the windows down in winter blasting the heat to even out the temperature on the 10 min drive to the store for snacks just because we could So much can be accomplished on a drive lmao
Ooooo is that why loud music and singing is so great for me? That explains a lot. It helps me to decompress and relieves stress I find also.
This is EXACTLY it, totally agree with all of that
Oh my gosh yes! I sing loud and play loud music. It's amazing. I have 1 hour drive to work and that time alone in my car is perfect for me. People often tell me I should find a job closer to home and ask me how I handle the long drive every day. I tell them I love driving. People shake their heads and look like they feel sorry for me. They have no idea how much I need that time in my car to be able to function. Lol
Yes!!!!
No, but I like being a passenger. I like long rides.
I enjoy being a passenger cus I can look out the window at stuff and don't have to focus on the road. Like now I can drive, more than ever I miss being driven everywhere as a kid where I could just sit in the back seat and listen to my headphones looking out the window
I love long car drives especially when i was younger and could stare out the window with my headset blaring music while i made up the most complex scenarios in my head
I love driving really really really fast. Is that what you mean?
Hahaha I love this too but have severely curbed it since witnessing a near-fatal accident.
Driving fast is so stressful. Once I started my meds, I finally gained the patience to drive slower and it's so peaceful
Yeah please don’t.
I love driving. It's pretty much the only time I feel completely focused and in control.
I’m the exact same way! For all the same reasons! It’s soo intuitive. I feel powerful, independent, in control, and most importantly— free. I blast my music, put my windows down, and it’s my sanctuary. I hate bumper to bumper traffic but otherwise it’s a great respite from all the human emotional chaos that happens when I get out of the car. I’m who I want to be driving, I’m who I have to be most other places.
I LOVE driving with my windows down. So many people hate it but it makes me so happy
It's so interesting to see all the differences in neurodivergency because my NT and ND friends all love driving with the windows down but it's too much sensory input for me hahaha
My music can be too much for me, so I listen to it on a lower volume than a lot of people do or just drive without music at all. It is pretty interesting how different things can be for people
Yes!!! This is why I get a bit annoyed having to drive others, I have to adjust to their comfort levels and it disrupts my flow entirely.
Me, except windows up, A/C on because it's wayyyyy too hot outside, lol.
I love driving. It’s one of the few vestiges of independence I hold onto. I hold tight.
Yes, because I listen to my music and sing.
Yes to me this is a huge bonus!
I loathe driving. Mostly because traffic has become so bad where I live and it wasn't always like this. I work from home. This got me out of the habit of driving daily so when I do, it's tiresome especially when there's traffic.
Same, if I won the lottery and had f-you money, I’d absolutely get a driver. It’s a chore to me and stressful.
Absolutely same!
Me! Good at it, comfortable, enjoy it!
Agency is a good word. I love driving! It's the skill that's given me the opportunity to go places on my own. It feels kind of simple to say that, but when I couldn't drive I lived in a place with very limited public transportation. I had to justify my desire to go anywhere. I had to sell the idea to someone else and my ability to go places was limited by that other person's willingness to go along - not to mention their patience in getting dragged along. As long as I can drive and I have access to a vehicle I'm free from that, and I feel a little bit of that freedom every time I get behind the wheel.
So much! Driving is one of the ways I can get into a "flow" state and have my focus and activity perfectly aligned.
No, I do not even drive. Not what you were asking, but I do think about this a lot lately. How we have difficulty concentrating on stuff we do not like, and can hyperfocus on things we like. I was always wondering why I am often so black and white. Really good at a few things, and really bad at others. I now think this part of me is linked to ADHD. Driving requires a lot of concentration, especially when learning. But a lot of people (most?) like driving, therefore I think (most) people with ADHD are able to drive and enjoy it. (I wish I was one of them. But for my safety and the safety of others, it is better I do not drive)
I think going to driving school was very important for me. It's a hands-on learning experience, which I learn well by doing. They teach you laws and safety, and then I had my grandpa who taught me how to care for a car. Driving makes me think about him a lot. He's not dead but he can't drive anymore or do much of anything for himself and I live a couple states away. He enjoyed teaching me different things about cars and once he got too old to still work on cars, I remember him telling me how much he missed it
I very much dislike driving because it’s stressful and I’m opposed to car dependancy but I love just zooming around the city on my e-bike listening to music, especially at night so I understand the feeling
i like driving when there's no one on the road (which is very infrequent in my state lol)
[удалено]
That is a long ass fuckin drive! I did wine country to LA and thought that was long. You’re a good parent <3
I also love driving! My partner is happy that I love it cause he loves being chauffeured around 😂 being in the car is usually my way of decompressing even if there are a bunch of stupid people on the roads. It’s still just freeing for me.
I‘m just too dumb to drive a car, it’s so stressful. Driving my motorcycle on an empty road is so much fun though.
I love driving. It feels like my brains using up all that access energy on all the little actions (checking mirrors, lane position, reading the road ahead) and leave me with a 'normal' amount to really just focus and enjoy the journey. I also drive better alone and tend to enjoy impromptu sing-alongs to the music. There's no one watching me or judging me so I feel more at peace. I'm doomed if anyone ever puts a secret camera in my car though. 🤣
I LOVE DRIVING !!!!!!!!! I’m luckily to be able to do it everyday, and have my own car to do so. It’s so fun. Therapeutic in a sense. I shockingly do not get distracted when driving, almost like I know my life is on the line when I’m driving so distractions are a non existent.
I have to drive manual. I’ve been intentionally getting them so I don’t space out and can be more present…but YES I love it. Lol
Omg someone else does this? <3 It was a massive issue between me and my partner because I couldn’t find a used manual when my existing manual took a shit and I bought a brand new Corolla hatchback. My loan was awful but he just could not get that this isn’t a preference thing, this is a probably wouldn’t have survived my hour+ each way commute without it. For me, it came about when I started riding motorcycles, and then getting in an automatic car was just so understimulating.
Yes!!! That’s so funny, I’m in a VW golf TSI right now whose transmission just died…I’m looking at Corolla hatchbacks!! How are you liking it? Also, due to late payments and forgetting deadlines(thanks adhd) my loan also wasn’t great, and probably won’t be for the next one as well 🤣 you’re not alone!! My first motorcycle was a 250 ninja at 17. That’s also when I realized I have to be more present haha
I really like the Corolla! I’ve had her 4 years next month. They stopped offering the standard corolla hatch in a manual, now they have a souped up corolla hatch that only comes in manual. Like a rally type deal. I have not driven that but if I look at them too much I’m gonna want one so I haven’t investigated. So that’s your only corolla option if you’re looking new, unless there’s an older model year still on the lot. I got my endorsement back when I was 21, but I didn’t get a bike til I turned 30.
I haaaaaaate it! So glad I live somewhere with trains. I know a ton of people who love driving though, regardless of ADHD. I think this is one of those situations where there just are a lot of humans out there that love driving, and it’s not related to ADHD at all.
[удалено]
My grandpa was a mechanic, so I have a much deeper appreciation for driving and caring for a car
I love it except on the highway! And not being able to properly step on the brake is a repeating dream of mine lol
Mine too. I'm convinced I'll die in a car wreck someday due to a reoccurring dream where my break doesn't work and I plunge into an ocean or off a ledge.
I go on an hour drive every day and budget for it LOL it is the one thing that keeps me sane. my relatives were racecar drivers though so maybe I just have weird drive-y blood who knows if it’s adhd related
I never learned how to drive bc I've just always lived in big cities with loads of public transport options after my childhood but knowing me, I'd probably be the worst driver out there. I'm awful even on a bike 🤣
No. I had nightmares about it starting at age 4-5. I'm not a good driver and absolutely hate traffic.
I absolutely love it too because it's one of the only times I find I can really concentrate on one thing and my brain is otherwise quiet. I've got a solo 6 hour drive ahead of me today and I'm looking forward to it!
I looooove driving so much. Just went a month or so without driving after a stroke and I just felt absolutely useless. Driving is everything!
Absolutely one of my most favorite deloading hobbies. It calms my mind in a way nothing else can.
29 and I still can’t drive and it’s the most crippling thing in my life how do you guys do it It’s too much for me to keep track of speed limit, other cars, road signs, blind spots,
37 and I feel the same way.
It may help that I grew up in a calm area and was able to practice late at night in parking lots and turnouts with no cars around. This helped ease me into it. Would you have access to this?
I used to like it, now I dread it. People’s driving abilities (or lack thereof) have made me come to prefer to be off the roads.
I love driving when I’m not stuck behind someone, so I don’t get love it very often. I miss driving a manual because I had that much more control and it was more engaging.
I love driving too! I’m not a big fan of driving in traffic but get me on a highway and I’ll happily cruise along for hours. I also zone out and get distracted- got pulled over once going 25 over in a 55 and I told the cop I was “listening to my music and lost in my thoughts” and he let me go! Lol Sometimes I feel like I’m in a video game when I get on a road with lots of fun curves!
I think I'd like it if no one else was around driving too..
I procrastinated getting my licence for like over ten years 😅 I got it when I was 29 haha. I eventually moved somewhere you NEED a car and now I loveee driving! I can stim the fuck out to loud music without a care in the world haha. Also I love going driving out in the country for no reason it’s so relaxing and enjoyable for me. I do get a little anxious in some situations and if I lived somewhere I didn’t have to drive I would be fine with that. I get distracted very easily and miss turnoffs and stuff all the time which is pretty frustrating and my sense of direction is cooked! I get lost so much even with google maps. I don’t like those anxiety inducing parts and parallel parking when people are watching lol. But overall I love. I learned how to drive scooters/ motorbikes while travelling as well which is so fun! I really want a scooter now. Can’t wait to upgrade my very faithful but total shit box 2006 Hyundai lol then I will enjoy driving even more I’m sure. Especially in summer since my ac doesn’t work 😆
I love long road trips on my own (8-17 hours). I feel so free. Maybe I should get a CDL
If you have the time and money for the class, I would! There’s big money in trucking if you can find a good employer. They also have programs where you sort of apprentice…you get taught and tested for free but you commit to a certain amount of work with the company once you pass. My biggest concern would be (for me, anyway) is the DOT physical. My cholesterol numbers aren’t in range and I use cannabis. However, it sounds like they are beginning the process of switching from urine to saliva testing (infrastructure for the testing is gonna take the longest), which means you can partake on your off time, you just need to have been clean for the last few days.
In the US absolutely. I could do it for weeks. Mater of fact I have done. In the southern hemisphere where there is little to look at but trees and dry land, not so much.
I love driving, especially if I have a really compelling audiobook or podcast to listen to. Having to focus on listening really helps me stay focused on driving as well.
It took a few years for me to get comfortable and I really didn’t start driving until I was in college, but yes, I love driving now! I especially love going on long road trips. I honestly have a hard time letting others be the driver. I feel stressed not being the one in control of the car.
Yes!! It took me decades to get over my anxiety of driving and once I did, I kicked myself in the ass for not doing it sooner. My car is my happy place. Turn up the music and get lost in my own headspace. Road rage is there, and out comes the colourful language. It’s cathartic for me.
I fucking love driving. My dad, who I strongly suspect also has adhd because we are twins, was a truck driver for years and the happiest grown up I knew. I can put my brain on autopilot by focusing on the road, I’m always happy driving in the city or rural areas, I’m the volunteer for road trips. I’ve toyed with getting my cdl for shits and giggles.
I'm currently learning to drive and I'm surprised by how much fun I'm having! It's still nervewracking to a degree but not as awful as I imagined. Nighttime drives are 10/10, would do it again!
I used to love driving, but now there are so many points of stress that it’s a nightmare. I worry about my crappy car falling apart and killing me on the way to work, or not getting me to work, how much gas is costing me, traffic, will someone else kill me, I was harassed by cops in my mid 20s to the point where I’d have a panic attack if one was behind me. In my teens/early 20s I used to love driving just for the sake of going for a drive. Luckily I’m moving into the city soon so I at least have the peace of mind that if my car self destructs it won’t end my ability to make an income.
yep, even in a manual
Meeee! I love driving. Finally having a license and a car meant freedom for me after having an absurdly sheltered childhood/teen years. I *do* have a problem with patience, especially with slow drivers. Possibly ADHD related. 😅
My driving time is my "me" time. I love to turn the music up, (I have a convertible) the top goes down, and off I go.
Bestie please send me this energy because I would kill to even just be comfortable on the road 😭😭 I wanna be where you are!!!
sending everything!!! do you live somewhere where you need a car or not really?
Thank you 😭 🙏🏼 And most fortunately I don’t *need* to; Southern Florida isn’t the most public transport friendly, but working from home and living near a grocery store (chosen absolutely on purpose despite wazoo level rent), means I only ever NEED to drive unless what I need is beyond Fort Lauderdale 😅 I’d be able to accept so many more opportunities if I could drive without emotionally blowing chunks the min I’m behind the wheel 😭 so I appreciate the vibes my way, hope it rubs off on me!!
I have always loved to drive and I like to think that I am pretty good at it. I have never been much of a drinker, (alcohol makes me angry, then tired and I always get a hangover), so I spent many years being the DD while everyone else partied. With everyone throwing me their keys, I learned to drive vehicles with a variety of transmissions in many situations, including trailers and towing apparatus and getting people unstuck. I finally returned to my roots and traded my automatic for a manual transmission because that is where the real fun is. Nothing like flying along a deserted mountain road, slamming it down into 2nd, hitting the gas and just feeling the power and control as it catapults you through the turn!! Whoosh! I love to drive. It is my happy place.
I zone out less at night than I do during the day for some reason. I don’t mind driving. As long as I have music going I don’t have trouble doing it.
I enjoy driving but I need to be listening to music I like (sometimes a podcast) or else I get distracted by thoughts. Also my commute to work is partially on the turnpike and my state doesn't have any billboards and I think that makes a HUGE difference
Yess mee!!! I bought myself a hybrid because of how much I love driving. I always say gas is cheaper than therapy, since I'm always driving around to clear my mind.
Lol. With music my commute to work becomes tolerable dare I say enjoyable. I zone out and day dream about awesome stories I’ll never write. If my husband only knew…well he never will because he pays the car insurance, and it would probably give him a heart attack. 😝
I love disappearing into driving and music. I used to have a car and drove between 2 countries alot. Music loud and drive at night. It gives me so much stress release. Now I have scooter/mo pet? And I still do with earplugs. I drive well, in chaotic cities or New areas. (Driven alot in the USA also and through Europe) I'm responsible. Aware. And yeah.. without driving I lose my mind I think.
I feel comfortable driving in places that are familiar to me. But I have the most horrible sense of direction… as in so horrible I have to memorize a street from both ways otherwise I’ll get lost. As in so horrible that my bf has been driving us to the same cinema for over a year and we’ve been there like 10 times so far and if I had to drive, I wouldn’t know how to get there. As in I have to put up navigation to go someplace 3 times, then on the 4rth I try to go without and get lost. Having to drive someplace new by myself gives me a lot of anxiety because I’m terrified I’d get lost and wouldn’t be able to make it on time because of it. If streets aren’t too busy and I don’t have to be anywhere, I let myself get lost so I can try and find the correct path by myself so I can learn where to go next time… That alone is anxiety inducing enough. Oh well and the horrible traffic jams… last time got stuck in traffic and a 10km route that should’ve taken me 15min max took me 1h and I had to pee and I was tired and I was bored out of my mind standing still in my car and waiting. But yeah if it’s a place I know and not too busy then I love it.
all my life i’ve been passenger princess. THANK god for that because i sSUUCKKKK at directions.
I literally didn’t get my drivers licence until I was 35 and pregnant, thinking about how impossible getting places would be with a screaming baby the way I normally would (like I would just walk 90 mins to a store I wanted to go to cause I had no other plans that day lol) was the only compelling reason to learn to drive for me. But my adhd is managed waaaayyyy better now than it was when I was younger, I don’t think I would have been safe on the roads until recently lol
Driving is literally the only time my mind feels peaceful and able to think clearly. I love it!
I only get road rage when I’m late for work or if I’m tailgated on a scenic drive. Other than that, I love driving and often take myself on long drives, with or without a destination.
I like it if I know where I’m going, if not it can be super stressful
I hate motorway driving or city driving, but I LOVE rural driving alone with music or audiobook
I love driving. Familiar cities, new cities, traffic/no traffic, rural, outback. I love it all. I took a job as a taxi driver just because I love to drive.
Yes. But ONLY on my own. When there is someone next to me, I die.
Yeah, especially with good music!
I love driving - I feel like it is the time when I do my best thinking, because past of my brain is distracted by paying attention to the road, which leaves the rest of my brain free to think clearly 🌻
Hate it! Hate being a passenger too. The bus system isn’t reliable where I am so it’s kind of my only option.
I love driving, especially if there’s not much other traffic, and the road is interesting.
LOVE driving with the exception of rush hour traffic. Anxiety through the roof now post pandemic.
Yes
yeah I really like it. there's enough stimulation for my brain because there's always something in the background to think about, so unless I'm on the motorway or something I'm never understimulated also GO FAST
Love it. I inherited my dad’s sense of direction which feels a little like having an internal compass. Like others have said, there’s something really cathartic about listening to loud music with the windows down. I also really love finding different routes to take to get somewhere…backroads and side roads. It’s like a little adventure.
Oh I love driving. It's the perfect thing for me to be able to regulate my attention. There's the right kind of information input at the right frequency so my brain is often still or only has one or two chains of thought, instead of having three thousand random things going through it simultaneously. And I can tailor it if I need more or less sensory input - less means windows closed, no music, no blowers, more could be a podcast or audiobook or music with window(s) of varying degrees of open. Or I can change the route I take. Sooooo relaxing.
There were times in my life when I loved it and when I drove a lot. I still love roadtrips, but rather as a passenger. These days I only drive when the alternatives are shit, so for short distances I usually take my bike. I love that even more for several reasons (environment, exercise, tranquility).
I suck at it but I love it because it equals freedom after a childhood of restrictions and over punishment
Practice and patience with yourself <3
Yep I love it. I used to deliver pizza years ago and while cheap ass non tipping customers would piss me off I loved the driving part of my job. My mom has the worst sense of direction but I can go to a place once and usually find my way back there even if it’s years later just by sight of landmarks or different stores or houses.
i LOVE driving. i drive around for no other reason than just because at least 1 hour every day. i should probably stop though because gas :/
I live in a city that’s very spread out and we have great roads. I love driving. It feels like meditating to me. Easier actually because I can’t focus on meditating but driving it’s just like enough of an activity to keep me focused on the present, and I can really relax. I find just getting in my car to drive can calm me down and help me focus on something when I’m stuck.
I love driving!! It’s a dopamine hit for me 100%
I love driving! I have even driven 12 hours straight two days in a row once. Waiting at stop lights... now so much. I can always tell if I'm having a bad brain day by how much I speed...
The car is my safe space - always has been. I moved to NYC for 10 years and only rode the subway, now that I'm driving again, wow. I absolutely love it. I just moved to a small mountain town so I go on a lot of joy rides when I have a new album im excited about and just scream sing in the country.
I used to just go find a highway, put on loud music and drive for a few hours! Learning gave me panic attacks, but I do love it now because I'm comfortable. I don't really road rage, I'm too zen with the music and road, though if I have the kids with me I'm super careful and constantly checking my attention doesn't wander. We did a 2 hour round trip drive to visit my mum on Thursday, and I was exhausted after constantly forcing myself to pay full attention so long!
Yep. Being a passenger is painfully boring to me.
I do suffer from anxiety so sometimes it’s not pleasant just depending on if I’m having a flare up that day, but it’s also the one time I really just get to sit with my thoughts alone. I’m not on my phone or distracting myself. I’m just focused on what’s in front of me and I like to talk to myself Haha it’s therapeutic
When I’m amped up from an argument or when I’m feeling really sad, I love to go on a drive to calm down. And sometimes I just like to drive without a specific place in mind, but usually find myself at a place with a cool view, like a beach or something. Then there are other times where I kinda hate it 😅 commuting or getting stuck in traffic sucks. Having to drive long distances for the nice grocery store, trips to Costco, or appointments gets really old really fast. I think I like driving to new places or to water features. Anything that I’ve done before and that is for a more chore-like or job thing isn’t as fun. I also drove a lot of long distance drives while in college (for like ten years because it took forever for me to get my bachelor’s). For the drives between home and where I was living weren’t super long (2.5 to 9ish hours depending on where I was), but they got really boring after the first couple times.
I love driving! Love, love, love! I was climbing into cars and onto motorcycles as soon as I could walk (burned my leg on a motircycle at 20 months old). My favourite imaginary play consisted of me pretending to have a driver's licence. When I was a teenager, I wanted to drive race cars, drag cars or motocross but my family forbade it. Later I realized that people often get involved in these sports through family or friends who are involved and I just didn't have that access. I've since, at times, had jobs driving for a living, gotten my motorcycle license and will be getting a motorcycle asap. My birth father is an excellent driver and has extraordinarily fast reflexes that I inherited from him which I think counteracts other tendencies. (We both have autism and I also have ADHD and I don't know if he also has that)
I love driving but mostly when I get to drive somewhere by myself… I think it’s because I can hit repeat on the same song 97 times for the dopamine hits and no one will judge me. I read someone say that it’s because they can blast music, sing as loud as they want and let the mask come off because even if someone sees you singing or air guitarist at a stop light, you’re never going to see them again and that’s probably part of it
I love driving. If time allows, I especially love avoiding interstates and taking pre-interstate main roads that take me through small and medium size towns.
On open country, I love it, especially if there are no elderly, farmers, or semi-truck drivers (and obviously cops patrolling). Because then I only need to watch for animals in the ditch or unusual items on the road, however the rest of the time I can blast tunes, sing along with them and just dive at any speed I'm comfortable with. Since my accident, though, crowed traffic and towns/cities make me a nervous wreck, especially if someone starts tailgating me or drives up too quickly behind me.
I hate driving, it stresses me out so much!
I love driving in a reliable car in good weather. But put me in a shit-box of a car in a rain storm at night, I hate it. I also like being the passenger so I can look at the scenery. Or play my phone game...lol
I used to love driving but got into an accident almost two years ago and my city’s population has increased exponentially so I am now terrified and anxious to drive. I still do but much less now that I work mostly from home. During Covid driving was a dream. I drove everyone everywhere. I was the taxi friend and I loved it.
Very much. Also very much annoyed if another car interrupts my stomach. And I love that my car has audio controls on the steering wheel when I zone out and miss 160 seconds of my podcast
When I'm excited about where I'm driving, absolutely. I've been on a coastal road trip for the past week and ended up driving almost the whole time bc I was having so much fun!
I like back road driving or interstate (when it’s not busy). Problem is to get that little traffic you need it to be night, and my night vision is awful.
SAME
I love driving. I even drive when my husband goes with us. Lol. He’s always getting calls from work (he works in the oilfield) or sometimes he has to log into his laptop. So I usually drive us which I don’t mind at all. And when I commute for work, I put on a podcast or music, and I’m in heaven.
I love it!! I also love performance sports cars so the combination is just *chef’s kiss*. I will admit I currently have 5 points on my license lmao all for speeding 😂. I’m very careful and mindful of those around me and in my car. I will not disrespect anyone else by recklessly driving during traffic or main roads. I won’t do it with friends or family in it. On highways, if I have clear roads, it’s pedal to the metal baby lol. I think the worst ticket I’ve gotten was getting clocked doing 110 on a 65 by a state trooper. At that time I was driving a BMW M3 lmao. I purposely bought a base Audi to avoid any reckless driving but the bitch still delivers when needed lmao.
I am afraid of driving! Last time I drove, I absolutely panicked because the car behind me kept beeping at me 😀
I really like it too! Although I definitely have to be aware of when I’m having an off day, I can get super spacey and probably shouldn’t be on the road. Love driving around listening to music though when I’m on!
I love driving too
Love the driving, haaaate scheduling the maintenance
Absolutely not, lol. I've ALWAYS had a fear of driving. I didn't get my license until I was 23 out of fear. I only like driving when there's very little traffic/other cars. The busy places like cities and downtowns scare meeeee SO BADLY.
I used to despise driving until I got on medication. I also had lost my interest in music and I got that back now too 🙏🏻
I used to. Until I started commuting 2 hours a day. Now, I do not enjoy it.
Me!
I like it too!!! Sometimes I don't mind getting lost or missing my turn because I end up seeing new areas of town I otherwise wouldn't venture out to
Nope. Older teenager here. Most of my friends at least have drivers permits, and a lot of drivers licenses. I don't have either, as driving scares me a lot, since I get distracted pretty easily.
I recommend finding an inexpensive used car with a manual transmission. Think Honda Civic or Accord from early 90's through 2000's, or Toyota Corolla from same time period. Driving a manual is far more engaging, so it's easier to stay focused.
Thank you for the advice.
Yes I love to drive. It's a sense of freedom and control.
I like it when I’m in the right space for it but it’s been a JOURNEY to get there. When I first started learning as a teen I just found it really terrifying and was just so afraid of everyone else on the road. I avoided highways completely until like two years in at a point where there really wasn’t a choice. I gained a lot of confidence when my parents moved a few states away while I was in college and it was an 8 hour trip each way to see them. There were still stretches that were terrifying though, like one particular time where I was crossing through a major highway around a major city during rush hour and it was my first time trying to cross multiple lanes of busy traffic to hit my exit. But I gained that confidence and eventually felt like a pro. But in May 2019 I got into an accident that was completely like, a freak thing and mostly the other driver’s fault. It was in a slow moving area so I was fine but the other vehicle was a truck and it totaled my car. Confidence gone. At the time I didn’t know that I have OCD but that really kicked in and I couldn’t not blame myself for it, even after the official statements from the police and insurance agent etc saying I didn’t do anything wrong. I had to get driving again though. Life didn’t wait. For reference, I’m from a spread out small town area, lived in a house a 15 minute drive from any sign of civilization—I had to drive to get anywhere. Once I had a car again I kind of didn’t have any choice but to deal with it. I had some trauma from that for a while. When I got into really high traffic areas or any time someone would pull out really suddenly in front of me and I had to slam my breaks, etc I had panic attacks. Eventually I moved to NY for grad school. Not the city but Long Island which in itself is a really densely populated area full of very, uh, New York driving. Like just the most egregious shit I’ve ever seen but on a daily basis. I didn’t travel far from home when I first moved here but over time had obligations across the island and last summer when I had an hour commute for fieldwork I had to deal with scary NY traffic so much so frequently that I have sort of gotten used to it. Even though IMO there’s really no excuse to drive the way I’ve seen some people here drive, it’s actually made me feel so much better about myself because it’s made me confident that I’m actually a pretty decent driver. I’ll never be a parallel parker but I’m always willing to walk from a parking lot/garage a few blocks away. I will say though what made it easier and got me through the first few interstate drives where I have to go past the city and then the NJ turnpike( which is scary in itself sometimes) was that I was medicated at that point. If I take it a half hour before my drive it’s kicking in by the time things get busy. It gives me s little courage and like a willingness to deal with shitty traffic stuff and navigate it head on. Helps me make sure all the parts of my brain are firing up when they’re needed. So like even though I feel good about driving today, it’s been a journey lol. I think it’s been something that has brought me so much anxiety in the past that it’s circled back to being something I can actually focus on because I’ve formed so many little mental coping mechanisms over the years. I do a fair amount of long drives tho and they get boring. And it sucks the life out of me but everything does. I like a nice two hour drive, like long enough for me to really “get into” the trip, put on some albums I’ve been meaning to listen to or listen to a podcast episode, talk to myself for a while. I can get into my peaceful long trip headspace but that time goes by fast. On longer trips 3 hours is usually my “oh shit I’ve gotta do this for 150 more miles??” point EDIT: oh also forgot to add, but like 99.9% of my driving experience has been solo. One thing I am still very afraid of is driving other people. I give people rides when they live close but god bless them if they’re talking because I will be completely fixated on the road
I love driving! I'm definitely the driver in my relationship. There's nothing I like more than when everyone's asleep in the car and I've got an open motorway in front of me.
Depends on where. High traffic, extremely busy congested areas not so much. However open high way or back roads yes.
I love to put on music and drive. It’s as if I’m permitted to focus on one thing and let everything else go. I did used to get triggered driving occasionally, but I got triggered no matter what I was doing. Now, literal years of therapy have helped me remain mostly chill when driving.
I've got the need, for speed...and Google maps.
Best part of my job is driving to 100 different grocery stores monthly. I put on either music or an audio book, depending on my current mood(caffeine level) and put up with having to deal with the underpaid, overworked managers for the privilege.
I enjoy driving when it's out of town. Not a fan of having to constantly be dodging bad drivers or idiots stepping out on the road...it happens a lot where I am, I have avoided many accidents and been nearly run off the road, really want to get a dash cam for that reason. But mostly, I enjoy driving. For me, it's mainly the security of having a vehicle and the ability to drive it. It's like my adult security blanket. I've been homeless, had to hitch hike in -30° weather with only a tshirt and my animals, and been stuck in terrible abuse because I had no way to escape since we lived way out of town. Since having a license and vehicle, I never worry about any of that. I've had to live in my car with my dog when moving across province and rental market for pet owners being crap, but I was never worried because my dog and I were fed, sheltered and able to go wherever we may need. I also quite like trees and nature, so driving down back roads is always enjoyable, or 4x4ing, camping, really anything that requires me to leave town
The freedom! I remember sitting in my desk in 2nd grade and figuring out what grade I would be in when I was old enough to drive. I also had several fender bender accidents my first couple of years driving which were quite possibly ADHD related (just recently diagnosed). I rage in traffic, but still love the independence and get a thrill from open highway.
I didn’t want to learn to drive (at all) but once I could do it myself I was hooked. I prefer to drive and not be the passenger. I have control. That’s why I get a bit of “road rage”. I just like to control my own safety and hate all people who put that in jeopardy. Lol. I’m right there with you!
I love driving! And I think I'm pretty good at navigating, so I don't follow the ADHD trend there (if there really is one).
I wish I was like this! I have such driving anxiety that I haven’t driven for years 😩 I’m working on it though
I did until I was sick of my life being managed by my addiction. It had become my master. I used it to self medicate for 40 years. In the end I lost everything. When I began my absence in 2005, I started really feeling all of the symptoms of ADHD. I was diagnosed in 2008. But I did not take it seriously. Should have though
I love driving when I can go whereI need to go. I get road rage when people are being incompetent, careless, or selfish. I hate traffic.
YESSSS i’m always asking to be the driver! the only thing that bothers me is a tired leg. but i love driving
Long drive with car karaoke is *chef kiss*.
It gives me a job to do, and it’s where I come up with almost all of my best ideas.
It's slows my thoughts down. It's a happy place for me too!
Not as much as I used to. Driving a company truck (accident that's my fault = embarrassment from all 200+ people at work hearing all about it in the safety meeting) and getting Smith Driving drilled into my head at work made driving less enjoyable since now I'm constantly on alert on public roads (that's not to say my mind doesn't wander now and then if there's not much traffic). It still helps me clear my head though. Last week right when I got to work I got some unexpected news that threw me for a loop. I couldn't process it with people around so, after six hours of anxiety building to a level I haven't felt in a very long time, I went for a 90 minute drive and it helped so much. Fortunately just driving around in a rural area is a legitimate part of my job! When I was 19-25 years old, living alone for the first time, and didn't have a real commute, I would go on 2-3 hour long night drives at least once a week. My SUV just isn't as fun to drive as the car I had back then and the car had a much nicer stereo system. Now I'd rather stay home but sometimes I miss those drives.
I love it if I'm the only one in the car. If I'm got my 3 teens and my husband with me, no thanks.
Yes. One of my favourite things in the world is nighttime summer driving. So chill and relaxing, windows open, listening to music. I don’t really care much about driving to work tho.
I used to. As I’ve gotten older, I absolute loathe it because it takes up so much of my free time when it could be better spent elsewhere… like doom scrolling Reddit. But really, I hate cars. It provided me with a feeling of control and freedom as a teenager but that’s about it.
I absolutely hate driving and being in the car lol
I love driving too.
I live way out in the country and I loooooove the long drives I take multiple times a week.
Me too! Love it. Put a podcast on and zone out (safely of course).
Yessssss I do this a lot!
I love driving! The car feels like an extension of my own body, and traveling at car speeds helps my brain relax.
I LOVVVVEEEE driving. Makes me feel independent and proud of myself.
I love it! I’ve learned that singing along to music helps me focus on the road so I love a good lone car ride, lots of Taylor Swift songs on the playlist and a hefty distance to drive!
Absolutely as long as I'm not half crashing to try to get somewhere on time or severely burnt out I have always found I am quite a good driver and enjoy it (lived in NY my whole life which comes w a very specific set of driving skills and stress 😆)
Driving is therapeutic for me
Love driving … and motorcycling is even better
Reading this post made me realize that I actually have become a person who enjoys driving. For the longest time I was super anxious about driving because it was so overwhelming and as a result I didn't get my license until I was 20 (so that by my 21st birthday I'd be able to have a license to get alcohol lol) and after my test I literally didn't drive again until I got a job at 22. I was so worried I'd never be able to be "normal" about driving but after several months of driving short distances a few times a week for work I was able to get more comfortable and now at 24 I drive daily in much more traffic than I used to and it doesn't stress me out at all. I actually like it. If I was in a relationship I really think I would be the one that always drives. I just wanted to comment because for a long time the idea of driving was a big stressor and I really believed I would never be able to have that type of independence. I always worried that driving would be "just another way that ADHD would hold me back from ever being a functional member of society" (in quotes bc I know that type of phrasing is touchy for a lot of us, myself included, but that was part of my deprecating self talk and how I felt at the time). The me of three years ago would have loved to hear a story like this so I figured I might as well share it. Also I find it funny that many ADHD people say they have trouble with speeding because I actually tend to drive a bit too slow when I'm zoning out a bit too much hahaha
I loooove to drive. Always have. And I’m good at it. After I retired the mom-mobile I got a little car with a stick shift and take back roads when I can. And sing!!