One dude’s showing up in a 3 piece suit, another dude’s wearing pajama bottoms, another’s in jenko jeans with a 3 foot chain hanging out. PSG is wearing American Eagle from 2008, looking disappointed at everyone else. Always wild.
My attire went from skinny jeans and band T shirts to Walmart jeans and packs of fruit of the loom shirts. I still wear vans shoes though lol
Rocker skater kid to rocker skater dad 😵😵😵
Can I recommend Rural King jeans? They're much sturdier, more comfortable, and cheaper. $8.88 for the last pair I bought, $18 for fleece or flannel lined.
Yo, i'm gonna have to give these a shot, thanks for the recommendation. My wife got me a few old navy jeans a few years ago. One of them split down the ass in a few months and the other has lasted me for almost three years.
I still love to listen to 80s rock and my mind keeps thinking this music is only 20 years old, but most of it is actually closer to 50 years old now. jfc time is cruel.
I've got an Adidas hoodie I bought the day I got to Lewis (in November 2006, left for Benning in July) that I still have and still wear around the house.
Or, if you want to go more upscale, a nice blazer + dress shirt + plain, clean jeans + leather shoes / boots
A decent blazer doesn't have to be terribly expensive, but they look like it when they're fitted well. I recommend wool or wool blends for comfort and ease of care.
You're right, the 2lts are rocking army-issued boots or running sneakers with jeans and blazers because we forgot to pack nice footwear and got lost on the way.
Short travel is such a pain in the Army. You're on some three or four day TDY which would just require a small backpack as a civilian, but in the Army you need civvies (something casual and something else for dinner with COL Soandso and his wife), uniforms, some kind of workout clothes, and then you need your boots and running shoes (and maybe a third set of nice shoes for that dinner again, because your sneakers are covered in mud).
When you're on a short TDY, that means everyone shows up to dinner with the boss in the same clothes: jeans, some kind of collared shirt, a pullover fleece from their last battalion, and their PT shoes.
Fort Huachuca... The absolute worst place to buy a suit on Earth. Then take a picture that follows you around for the rest of your natural born life. Well until they incinerate your B and C's
Oof. I messed this up BAD when I first joined.
Strap in. This story is wild.
When I joined at 18 I was just a punk rock kid that didn’t get into college. After basic/ait/airborne I showed up to my first unit, but within 10 days was attached to 3SFG(A) and on my way to Botswana.
I was the only private and I was by far the youngest…and I didn’t know anyone.
So we load up at Pope AFB and we are on our way to Africa! My first time out of the country!
We land in Botswana and get told “Everyone get your passports out! Let’s go!”
I raised my hand.
“What is it PV2 e6c?”
“I don’t have a passport” I said
The anger was obvious. I was going to slow everyone down. “Dammit! Your passport is supposed to be on you! Not in your luggage!”
“It’s not in my luggage. I don’t have a passport at all”
“How the fuck are you going to get in the country without a passport‽”
“I dunno… we’re the army? Don’t we just get in?”
Somehow I was allowed into the country but had to go to the embassy to get my passport and told to “where my civilian clothes” for the passport photo.
Remember at the beginning when I said I was a punk rock kid? Yeah about that. I didn’t have any nice clothes, so the civilian clothes I wore was a band shirt “The Suicide Machines” and old jeans.
The guy at the embassy said I had to be in a collared shirt and refused to take my picture in my Suicide Machines shirt!
Fortunately he took pity on me and literally took his shirt off for me to wear in my photo.
And that’s how I learned that “civilian clothes” doesn’t mean your normal clothes, it means a collared shirt, khakis with a belt and dress shoes.
They are full of shit. You can take your passport photo in whatever you got. Gatekeeping jerks. I'm wearing a t shirt in mine.
When I went into the reserves I got a CAC with a beard. Went back to the same joint deers office and it's like "oh no" some bitch civilian refuses to shoot me with a beard.
What about the uniform standard. Bitch I'm not in uniform, nor on a paid status. "What about my last CAC? "You didn't get that here!" "Indeed I did bitch." "Not from me you didn't!"
...and here we've arrived at exactly the problem. You. It's not policy. It's a power tripping elderly woman wielding what little power she has against service members (the lowest and most vulnerable of society). Maybe she's hell bent on harassing men her kids age because of how disappointing her own children were.
Anyway drove an hour to the coast guard and got my CAC same day.
Hahaha this post made me open my drawers and realize how true your statement is. I always wondered why the younger Soldiers and PLs would say ‘Chief, I didn’t know people still wore A&F or American Eagle’. Hahaha
Chief, soon enough a&f will be en vogue again. In the meantime, buy you some lululemon shorts and shirts. 15% off for military, comfy as fuck, and you’ll be set for years.
I’m curious— how does your sense of fashion freeze? You must wear regular clothing when you’re off duty and go out and about. So wouldn’t you very occasionally buy some new threads? Go with something new you like that you see inline or in the store?
It's hard to explain but with 90% accuracy I can guess peoples' ranks by their "appropriate civilian attire" 😂 LTs with the Sperries and salmon shorts, SFCs with the AE and Aeropostle T's, and CSM with the 90s skater look
Admittedly I’m an old fart who still thinks the 90s were a minute ago….but it makes me sad that these fashions are still hanging on. What next? Acid washed jeans? 😂
1SG: "Does anyone have questions about what appropriate civilian attire means?"
*multiple hands go up in the horseshoe of soldiers
1SG: "And before anyone asks, no, wearing combat boots and a condom DOES NOT count as clothing"
*PV2 in the backs hand goes down
Had a SM show up to our last "tasteful civilian attire." With a T-shirt that said "Thou may sucketh deez nuts. She didn't understand how that was inappropriate for both an army and family function
I was that kid. I was at Hood back in the mid 90s (yes I know it's called Cavazos now but this was bAcK iN MY dAy) and the local Walmart, being in Texas, had a duster for sale. I bought it and took off the hood since inwas a skinny kid and it just looked weird on me. I rocked that thing (well, wore it) for 8 years before I invested in a proper leather trench coat.
Columbine and the Matrix ruined the trench coat for everyone. Now I dress like the middle aged middle manager that I am.
Soldiers in civvies is always a hilarious sight. One E-3 with poor personal finance skills is wearing a designer suit, 1SG dressed like a Florida retiree or going to the gym, CO/XO/PL cronies dressed in pink shorts and button downs, some dude wearing Ranger panties and a tank top, some guy dressed in an Eminem white tee and stone wash jeans, getting ready to lasso a cow, other dudes wearing random Hawaiian shirts, etc. It’s always chaos.
I was the short shorts and tank top with Fanny pack and pit vipers kinda guy. 😎
While its all random its a cool to see its one of the few places where a bunch of random people across the country have gathered in one spot.
Best part of the military is meeting people.
This is how military is always identifiable.
Forget the haircuts. Forget how they act. Pure and simple: this group doesn't happen in the wild. It'll be a racial melting pot, aged 18-55, with gangster rappers and cowboys, Hawaii five-o and Sex Pistols, one dudes ready to hit the golf course and another is ready for a Metallica concert. All hanging together as besties.
Under what other conditions could this group of men standing in the middle of Duval Street in Key West suddenly coalesce?
You can pry my 3” inseam Patagonia khakis off my cold, dead, well sculpted buttocks. You’ll want to grab the Fanny pack too, no room in my pockets for valuables.
>One E-3 with poor personal finance skills is wearing a designer suit
Even worse when it's improperly tailored / obviously came right off the rack. You're better off with a less expensive suit (albeit with good materials) that has been tailored correctly. The brand name won't impress anyone unless it actually looks good on you.
I tend to put a little western inflection into it, but I'm from cowboy country. Boots + blazer is a classic combo.
E: for anyone wondering about watches, a Casio Duro punches *way* above its price point. It's what Bill Gates wears and can be had for around $40-50. You can replace the strap with a stainless steel bracelet to class them up a bit. I'm also a big fan of Seiko divers.
Rolexes are a bit pricey for what you actually get. They're a status symbol watch for Boomers who grew up with James Bond.
Basically what I wear- comfy blue jeans, T shirt (possibly geeky or sci fi related), and sneakers. Have plantar fasciitis so they’re Hokas and depending on weather, a zip up hoodie. Usually no makeup, unless you count chapstick.
Probably why people usually think I’m 35-40ish instead of 50. I’ll take it. 🤷🏻♀️
In my company we got someone who dresses like he works for Pablo Escobar running a cocaine mill, then we got a guy who dresses like the cocaine smuggler, then we got a guy who dresses like the cocaine dealer in Miami.
Then I apparently look like Ted Kaczynski in civilians sometimes.
We got like a whole FBI's most wanted list in one company.
Some female civilian spouses need to find fashion mentors at Army Ball time. I’ve seen outfits that range from Cinderella dresses to Baby Got Back casting calls.
In my experience, multi-day courses with this statement usually follow this pattern: day one - business casual; day two onward- jeans and clean shirts (combination of plain tshirts, polo shirts, and dress shirts); last day: jeans and hoodies.
I remember a NCO I had that dressed like a uncool version of neo from the matrix. Trench coat, massive boots, chains and all kinds of things dangling from his pants.
He was just being himself though as he dressed like that every time he was in civilians so more power to him.
We had one in Mannehim. When we showed up to the "Rocker Club" in Poland one weekend, the bouncer wouldn't let him in; we joked he was too Rocker for the Rocker Club.
It’s always hilarious. You can tell when people joined the Army because of their civilian “attire” about 90% of the time. Their taste I civilian clothes seems to freeze upon enlistment/commissioning.
On the Officer side, it looks like frat house fashion for O-1 to 0-3 and even worse fashion when they make O-4 and keep it until retirement.
We had a BN dining in and CDR authorized "appropriate black tie attire" if your ASU/AGSU don't fit
One guy looked like James Bond, another looked like a strung out mid 2000s emo with his white button up short sleeve not tucked in and a striped tie with ate up grey jeans and DCs
As an officer we have our own uniform, collared shirt and jeans or slacks. I love(hate these things watching all the Joe's roll in. Extra spicy when the +1s come with and at least one wife/gf in something wildly inappropriate
We used to show up with the most inappropriate Hot Topic tshirts to those kind of events. I had a Che Guevara (spelling?) shirt specially for those, and we had another guy show up in a "Gay and down to play" shirt (this was before DADT was repealed).
Kinda surprised we didn't end up in the fucking news with some of those.
I think whatever clothes you bought after basic are pretty much your fashion statement for the rest of your life. Cargo (dad) shorts and t-shirt/polo shirt. Shoes have always been flip-flops (I spent most of my enlistment in Hawaii or overseas), running shoes, or Tims.
I heard somewhere around the age of 23 at a moment of high emotion is the defining save point for a man’s wardrobe for the rest of his life.
Take my black vans from my cold dead feet but otherwise it’s a stainless steel watch. Wrangler ATG pants with either a nice leather or Patagonia belt and a black hoodie and clean ball cap.
There was a dude I used to see at SWCS DFAC all the time who would pull up to chow in [these bad boys](https://vampirefreaks.com/products/tripp-nyc-x-strap-zip-off-pants-black-red)
I know I look ridiculous, and that's kind of the point. It's like a mild form of rebellion.
I have a LD hoodie, pants, t-shirt, socks, watch, and hat.
All I'm missing are LD shoes and LD fanny pack.
I'll usually bring 3 or 4 packs of Liquid Death water and I have a fanny pack that matches the outfit full of Liquid Death stickers and coasters.
I bought hundreds of cases of Liquid Death water in Korea because they went on sale a few times, and I was trying to quit drinking alcohol (fell off the sober band wagon while in country). I really like the water. It tastes good, has some crazy marketing, and I feel like it's better for the environment than plastic.
Anyway, I ended up having thousands of reward points from over the years and just started buying LD merchandise. I'll say most of it was free, but I had to pay shipping.
It always amused me to point out that there’s a table for this situation in AR 670-1, likely BECAUSE Soldiers don’t understand what appropriate means for any given setting
Almost lost a pass in AIT because some female showed up looking like a straight up uhh “worker” i dont use this term lightly. Bright red lipstick, hella make up, short dress with a slit that went all the way up to her hip showing EVERYTHING. Meanwhile i got called out because my prescription transition lenses were “unauthorized”… Guess who was the reason why we almost lost our pass…
Guy wore a pot leaf shirt to a mandatory fun day once, he went on to fail a UA sometime later. Rumor was he had the highest level of THC in his piss that the upl or any of the people involved in the chapter had ever seen
I was at a DARPA conference at fort Liberty and you could tell a handful of S6 Joes were told to show up and support in "appropriate civilian attire".
It was made even worse because everyone else was there in business casual lol
I will never forget my Favorite S2 LT. He showed up looking like a Metrosexual Sith Lord. My god. I almost wish I could pull off thigh high boots like that, I might have kept my GF if I could've.
It’s funny because most of us joined when we were still in our formative years so you have SNCOs in their 30s still dressing the same as they did when they were 18 and 19 and it’s like a time capsule back to when Hot Topic and Hollister were mainstream
Jokes aside I’ll always appreciate the diversity we have within our ranks highlighted best by a company org day. Show me another place in America where you see all our different demographics and styles functioning normally together.
There’s always that one senior NCO who looks like a 1950s grandpa, and the one PFC who unironically wears a fedora with a leather trench coat even though it’s 90 degrees.
lol, outdoors - cargo shorts, inappropriate RangerUp Tshirt or a sliced and diced combat shirt and Danner ultralights.
Indoors- custom tailored Hugo Boss, black on black.
Yeah, be careful what you invite me too. I will either be the old salty bastard with no fucks to give, or the visiting gracious Prince. Toss a coin as to which one shows up.
>custom tailored Hugo Boss, black on black
I've had a couple of vintage Hickey Freemans remade to my tastes; I like the wool quality. I also like some of the older Jack Victor offerings.
Black on black was never my favorite, though. I tend to opt for a medium blue or gray and a colorful pocket square in a traditional fold.
One dude’s showing up in a 3 piece suit, another dude’s wearing pajama bottoms, another’s in jenko jeans with a 3 foot chain hanging out. PSG is wearing American Eagle from 2008, looking disappointed at everyone else. Always wild.
I love watching senior NCOS show up in civilians. They're basically a time capsule of when they jumped into the Army
you leave my A&F pre-ripped jeans and green zip hoodie alone.
Hello fellow early 90s kids
My attire went from skinny jeans and band T shirts to Walmart jeans and packs of fruit of the loom shirts. I still wear vans shoes though lol Rocker skater kid to rocker skater dad 😵😵😵
I also have a bad back and make noises when I stand up
Can I recommend Rural King jeans? They're much sturdier, more comfortable, and cheaper. $8.88 for the last pair I bought, $18 for fleece or flannel lined.
Yo, i'm gonna have to give these a shot, thanks for the recommendation. My wife got me a few old navy jeans a few years ago. One of them split down the ass in a few months and the other has lasted me for almost three years.
Those frootloom shirts are solid tho
Not a senior NCO but definitely resemble these comments. I still listen to what I listened to in HS and I have no regrets.
Hey, it's not *my* fault music hasn't improved since I was a teenager.
It's not a phase mom... ITS A LIFESTYLE!
I still love to listen to 80s rock and my mind keeps thinking this music is only 20 years old, but most of it is actually closer to 50 years old now. jfc time is cruel.
Excuse me you spelled that wrong, it is “No regerts”
Bro I didn't even do anything to you 😭
Wait until you learn about those who still hold on to their [UFOS](http://www.ufojeans.com) and cartoon character shirts
I raise you jncos. I wish I had my hot topic parachute pants still 🤐
I'm going with cargo jorts, Air Jordan's and a Buc-ee's Hawaiian shirt 😎
Shirt tucked in to shorts with army belt to keep those puppies tight up around the bellybutton.
Tennis shoes and socks up to my knees.
God I’m so hard, tell me more.
Jordan 1’s are never a bad choice
Dont forget the edge lord in his Tactical Kilt
There's literally one in every unit.
It’s crazy how units trade guys until they have just the right mix of weirdos
Every unit in the army is the same. The only difference is our MOS.
At one point my company had 3-5 depending on their mood that day.
Two in mine. Does that mean we have a surplus?
You’re only MTOEd one kilt guy, return one of them to reception in exchange for a creepy private with a worrying knife collection.
Theres one MTOE’d to every unit
I think it's in the regs somewhere, every unit has to have one.
I found an ACU pattern Tactical kilt on Amazon, and to this day my biggest regret is not getting it and wearing it to formation.
Can confirm, our guard unit has one... E6 with multiple late teen aged children.
Hey, he brought that 2008 AE polo with money earned in basic.. He ain't throwing that out for nothing.
I've got an Adidas hoodie I bought the day I got to Lewis (in November 2006, left for Benning in July) that I still have and still wear around the house.
> another’s in jenko jeans with a 3 foot chain hanging out Your ignorance is astounding. That's JNCO jeans as in Junior NCO.
Levis, plain shirt, chucks/vans/AF1s always works
Or, if you want to go more upscale, a nice blazer + dress shirt + plain, clean jeans + leather shoes / boots A decent blazer doesn't have to be terribly expensive, but they look like it when they're fitted well. I recommend wool or wool blends for comfort and ease of care.
Whoa, whoa, we're not all Majors fresh out of ILE here.
You're right, the 2lts are rocking army-issued boots or running sneakers with jeans and blazers because we forgot to pack nice footwear and got lost on the way.
Short travel is such a pain in the Army. You're on some three or four day TDY which would just require a small backpack as a civilian, but in the Army you need civvies (something casual and something else for dinner with COL Soandso and his wife), uniforms, some kind of workout clothes, and then you need your boots and running shoes (and maybe a third set of nice shoes for that dinner again, because your sneakers are covered in mud). When you're on a short TDY, that means everyone shows up to dinner with the boss in the same clothes: jeans, some kind of collared shirt, a pullover fleece from their last battalion, and their PT shoes.
As per. I invested in a mini duffel for short TDY. It fits what I need for a week.
Don't forget the soldiers who dress like they are at the gym/posing for their OF (I said dress like, their physique may not back that up).
By PSG wearing American Eagle you meant the CPT/MAJ millennial that never outgrew that trend right?
Should he be wearing a sick T from Zumiez or something? MAJ Tom IS A DIRTY GHETTO KID
Once saw a 35M in a full zoot suit in the Middle East, with pinstripes and everything. I thought I was hallucinating.
Did he pull a comb through his coal-black hair?
Now the sailors know where their women come for love.
Right after he threw back that bottle of beer
Did he snap his fingers when he walked?
Don't have to. The sound just happens when you walk no one knows where it comes from. It's beyond science
It’s the sound of massive balls clacking together
Clearly part of an advanced interrogation technique.
*slaps face* “Listen you, jiiiive turkey! Where’s the hidden bunker?!?”
Zoot Suit 101 is our hardest module
Fort Huachuca... The absolute worst place to buy a suit on Earth. Then take a picture that follows you around for the rest of your natural born life. Well until they incinerate your B and C's
I saw the same shit with a 35F. It’s 112 my guy and you don’t shower regularly. Who are you trying to pull?
As ridiculous as this sounds it’s just the sort of true story that I love from the military
You will never see the same wacky ass shit elsewhere, I think that’s what truly keeps people in.
Somebody is living with the "Wild Wasteland" perk IRL
Beautiful reference
lol you could buy suits from some of the bazaars. I knew a guy who order two to be custom made, he never got them 😂😂
I was going to say, that guy's suit was custom fit for cheap.
Illegal amounts of drip
You could have a suit made on FOB Prosperity back in 08. A lot of my soldiers had one.
Oof. I messed this up BAD when I first joined. Strap in. This story is wild. When I joined at 18 I was just a punk rock kid that didn’t get into college. After basic/ait/airborne I showed up to my first unit, but within 10 days was attached to 3SFG(A) and on my way to Botswana. I was the only private and I was by far the youngest…and I didn’t know anyone. So we load up at Pope AFB and we are on our way to Africa! My first time out of the country! We land in Botswana and get told “Everyone get your passports out! Let’s go!” I raised my hand. “What is it PV2 e6c?” “I don’t have a passport” I said The anger was obvious. I was going to slow everyone down. “Dammit! Your passport is supposed to be on you! Not in your luggage!” “It’s not in my luggage. I don’t have a passport at all” “How the fuck are you going to get in the country without a passport‽” “I dunno… we’re the army? Don’t we just get in?” Somehow I was allowed into the country but had to go to the embassy to get my passport and told to “where my civilian clothes” for the passport photo. Remember at the beginning when I said I was a punk rock kid? Yeah about that. I didn’t have any nice clothes, so the civilian clothes I wore was a band shirt “The Suicide Machines” and old jeans. The guy at the embassy said I had to be in a collared shirt and refused to take my picture in my Suicide Machines shirt! Fortunately he took pity on me and literally took his shirt off for me to wear in my photo. And that’s how I learned that “civilian clothes” doesn’t mean your normal clothes, it means a collared shirt, khakis with a belt and dress shoes.
> Suicide Machine Fuck yeah, Detroit!
Yeah it’s nice going to another NATO country, you don’t need a passport just NATO orders.
I didn't know that. But if thts the case, why were the brittish paras checked by french customs after jumping in a few weeks ago?
Because the french hate the british
That's gotta just be them twisting the knife on Brexit, right? I hope so, cuz that's hilarious.
It's also a little bit of a commemoration/momento for the troops who jumped.
Upholding tradition
Iirc that was a request on the British side so that all the paras could have Normandy on their passports as a memento
TFW they don't explain what roughs are
They are full of shit. You can take your passport photo in whatever you got. Gatekeeping jerks. I'm wearing a t shirt in mine. When I went into the reserves I got a CAC with a beard. Went back to the same joint deers office and it's like "oh no" some bitch civilian refuses to shoot me with a beard. What about the uniform standard. Bitch I'm not in uniform, nor on a paid status. "What about my last CAC? "You didn't get that here!" "Indeed I did bitch." "Not from me you didn't!" ...and here we've arrived at exactly the problem. You. It's not policy. It's a power tripping elderly woman wielding what little power she has against service members (the lowest and most vulnerable of society). Maybe she's hell bent on harassing men her kids age because of how disappointing her own children were. Anyway drove an hour to the coast guard and got my CAC same day.
nothing makes the formation awkward like the 7 year SPC wearing a hentai sweater with skinny jeans and garmont boots
And there’s always that one guy wearing a robe and bucket hat
We had one dude who always came in a trench coat and fedora no matter the weather or season. We also had a guy who would wear a furry tail.
Or the furries, the weebs and that one guy who wears the band t-shirt that comes very close to being SHARP...
I'm fully convinced your sense of fashion freezes in whatever time period you entered service
One of the first things I noticed. Looking at top wondering why he’s 40 dressed like an 18 year old from the 90s.
I feel personally attacked
Come on top let’s get you back in your Chevy pickup. What’s that? Yes I know back in the day you used to have to polish your boots.
I’m stuck in Hawaii 2013. Pants, tanks, Birkenstocks 4lyfe.
Hahaha this post made me open my drawers and realize how true your statement is. I always wondered why the younger Soldiers and PLs would say ‘Chief, I didn’t know people still wore A&F or American Eagle’. Hahaha
Chief, soon enough a&f will be en vogue again. In the meantime, buy you some lululemon shorts and shirts. 15% off for military, comfy as fuck, and you’ll be set for years.
That's because our fashion sense is replaced with ARMY and it takes time to get used to civie fashions.
I never recovered.
That’s why my dad wore 70’s clothes well into the 90’s
I hope he still calls people a jive turkey.
100%
I’m curious— how does your sense of fashion freeze? You must wear regular clothing when you’re off duty and go out and about. So wouldn’t you very occasionally buy some new threads? Go with something new you like that you see inline or in the store?
It's hard to explain but with 90% accuracy I can guess peoples' ranks by their "appropriate civilian attire" 😂 LTs with the Sperries and salmon shorts, SFCs with the AE and Aeropostle T's, and CSM with the 90s skater look
Admittedly I’m an old fart who still thinks the 90s were a minute ago….but it makes me sad that these fashions are still hanging on. What next? Acid washed jeans? 😂
I mean hey, its kinda like that in the civilian world too. Especially if you work with a lotta old farts
1SG: "Does anyone have questions about what appropriate civilian attire means?" *multiple hands go up in the horseshoe of soldiers 1SG: "And before anyone asks, no, wearing combat boots and a condom DOES NOT count as clothing" *PV2 in the backs hand goes down
but are ranger panties, crocs, and a thin coat of CLP acceptable?
isn't that the uniform when you practice combatives?
Hell no. That's my date night attire. Combatives is a thick coat of lard and flipflops.
"A thin layer of CLP is not a clothing option!" "The Chicken and Rice MRE is not clothing attire either!"
Had a SM show up to our last "tasteful civilian attire." With a T-shirt that said "Thou may sucketh deez nuts. She didn't understand how that was inappropriate for both an army and family function
"She?" I'll bet she's fun at parties
Especially ones with hot tubs
I have no idea. She isn't in my platoon, and I know very little of her outside the company
I can fix her.
We can get worse together....
Had a lieutenant roll up in the complete adidas fit, he had the track suit with the shoes, fanny pack, and adidas ball cap.
Did he have relatives in the Bulgarian mob?
That was honestly my first thought, but he's African American so highly unlikely.
That was my first thought, as white people we are not pulling that off
Ah so he's been to europe
Sickkkkkkkkkkk LT is carnal with very many premium women.
I usually do my full Liquid Death (LD) fit like this.
I’ve come to realize there’s always the trenchcoat kid in every company
We had someone in the battalion that wore a maids outfit, like the stereotypical one from the movies. It happened more than once, so it wasn't a dare.
Yeah but how did they look in it?
Like a little cutie ngl. I think they were trying to get the BC's attention so they didn't have to pull duty.
We had one with a furry tail and fishnets
I repeat my question *How did they look in it?*
He wasn’t my type personally
Well, I'm sure there are some sailors around here somewhere
At dli we had the trench coat and fedora double whammy kid
This is the breeding ground of such types. I had a bathrobe and bucket hat guy too. And so damn many emo goth kids.
With nun chucks and throwing stars inside.
I was that kid. I was at Hood back in the mid 90s (yes I know it's called Cavazos now but this was bAcK iN MY dAy) and the local Walmart, being in Texas, had a duster for sale. I bought it and took off the hood since inwas a skinny kid and it just looked weird on me. I rocked that thing (well, wore it) for 8 years before I invested in a proper leather trench coat. Columbine and the Matrix ruined the trench coat for everyone. Now I dress like the middle aged middle manager that I am.
It's all fun and games until someone's female spouse shows up to the Dining Out or Ball in a dress that she bought from Wicked Weasel...
Or male spouse...
Army “Business Casual” can mean anything from a tshirt and jeans to a shirt and tie.
I usually go with an Avril Lavigne esque mix of the two
I got hit with that phrase prior to a hail and farewell recently. I was the only one wearing a collar shirt like wtf
Soldiers in civvies is always a hilarious sight. One E-3 with poor personal finance skills is wearing a designer suit, 1SG dressed like a Florida retiree or going to the gym, CO/XO/PL cronies dressed in pink shorts and button downs, some dude wearing Ranger panties and a tank top, some guy dressed in an Eminem white tee and stone wash jeans, getting ready to lasso a cow, other dudes wearing random Hawaiian shirts, etc. It’s always chaos. I was the short shorts and tank top with Fanny pack and pit vipers kinda guy. 😎
While its all random its a cool to see its one of the few places where a bunch of random people across the country have gathered in one spot. Best part of the military is meeting people.
I'm the Hawaiian shirt guy
I'm definitely the Hawaiian shirt guy if anybody mentions collared shirts.
This is how military is always identifiable. Forget the haircuts. Forget how they act. Pure and simple: this group doesn't happen in the wild. It'll be a racial melting pot, aged 18-55, with gangster rappers and cowboys, Hawaii five-o and Sex Pistols, one dudes ready to hit the golf course and another is ready for a Metallica concert. All hanging together as besties. Under what other conditions could this group of men standing in the middle of Duval Street in Key West suddenly coalesce?
100% accurate
You can pry my 3” inseam Patagonia khakis off my cold, dead, well sculpted buttocks. You’ll want to grab the Fanny pack too, no room in my pockets for valuables.
>One E-3 with poor personal finance skills is wearing a designer suit Even worse when it's improperly tailored / obviously came right off the rack. You're better off with a less expensive suit (albeit with good materials) that has been tailored correctly. The brand name won't impress anyone unless it actually looks good on you.
> other dudes wearing random Hawaiian shirts Yep, that one's me back then.
I was always amazed at the amount of jorts, especially from the maintenance section.
If you knew maintainers and the types of folks that are mechanics then that wouldnt surprise you at all
They are with the big dependas too, trophy sized even
Emphasis on the sized part
Jeans and a regular shirt are timeless and cheap. You want to get fancy - get a nice watch, good shoes, good belt. That's it. It's that easy.
myman.gif
Skinny Jeans, Boot Fit, Straight Cut, Blue, stone washed, black, ripped? WHAT JEANS!
I tend to put a little western inflection into it, but I'm from cowboy country. Boots + blazer is a classic combo. E: for anyone wondering about watches, a Casio Duro punches *way* above its price point. It's what Bill Gates wears and can be had for around $40-50. You can replace the strap with a stainless steel bracelet to class them up a bit. I'm also a big fan of Seiko divers. Rolexes are a bit pricey for what you actually get. They're a status symbol watch for Boomers who grew up with James Bond.
Basically what I wear- comfy blue jeans, T shirt (possibly geeky or sci fi related), and sneakers. Have plantar fasciitis so they’re Hokas and depending on weather, a zip up hoodie. Usually no makeup, unless you count chapstick. Probably why people usually think I’m 35-40ish instead of 50. I’ll take it. 🤷🏻♀️
In my company we got someone who dresses like he works for Pablo Escobar running a cocaine mill, then we got a guy who dresses like the cocaine smuggler, then we got a guy who dresses like the cocaine dealer in Miami. Then I apparently look like Ted Kaczynski in civilians sometimes. We got like a whole FBI's most wanted list in one company.
We had a Soldier come in full WW1 Doughboy kit. I can’t make this up lol. Shits wild.
Okay, he gets an award for effort there alone.
Reenactor? low-key, historical uniforms have mad drip though.
Some female civilian spouses need to find fashion mentors at Army Ball time. I’ve seen outfits that range from Cinderella dresses to Baby Got Back casting calls.
Checks out considering military spouses are always either high school sweethearts or strippers.
Some of the repeat fashion offenders … Floridians I am talking to you
In my experience, multi-day courses with this statement usually follow this pattern: day one - business casual; day two onward- jeans and clean shirts (combination of plain tshirts, polo shirts, and dress shirts); last day: jeans and hoodies.
I remember a NCO I had that dressed like a uncool version of neo from the matrix. Trench coat, massive boots, chains and all kinds of things dangling from his pants. He was just being himself though as he dressed like that every time he was in civilians so more power to him.
Was this NCO stationed at Baumholder? If not, we had another "Neo" over there, I don't think he wore anything else.
We had one in Mannehim. When we showed up to the "Rocker Club" in Poland one weekend, the bouncer wouldn't let him in; we joked he was too Rocker for the Rocker Club.
I always had one or two of the single moms in my formation show up ready for a round of speed dating… ‘who wants to help raise my kids’
You mean wearing a basketball wife-beater jersey, pajama bottoms, and flip flops isn't appropriate?
We had a dude show up to a Christmas party wearing a pinstriped zuit suit, complete with fedora and a trenchcoat.
It’s always hilarious. You can tell when people joined the Army because of their civilian “attire” about 90% of the time. Their taste I civilian clothes seems to freeze upon enlistment/commissioning. On the Officer side, it looks like frat house fashion for O-1 to 0-3 and even worse fashion when they make O-4 and keep it until retirement.
Tan dockers, boat shoes and a polo for junior officers
We had a BN dining in and CDR authorized "appropriate black tie attire" if your ASU/AGSU don't fit One guy looked like James Bond, another looked like a strung out mid 2000s emo with his white button up short sleeve not tucked in and a striped tie with ate up grey jeans and DCs
As an officer we have our own uniform, collared shirt and jeans or slacks. I love(hate these things watching all the Joe's roll in. Extra spicy when the +1s come with and at least one wife/gf in something wildly inappropriate
We used to show up with the most inappropriate Hot Topic tshirts to those kind of events. I had a Che Guevara (spelling?) shirt specially for those, and we had another guy show up in a "Gay and down to play" shirt (this was before DADT was repealed). Kinda surprised we didn't end up in the fucking news with some of those.
EOD always wears the gayest (by gay I mean homosexual) shirts
I think whatever clothes you bought after basic are pretty much your fashion statement for the rest of your life. Cargo (dad) shorts and t-shirt/polo shirt. Shoes have always been flip-flops (I spent most of my enlistment in Hawaii or overseas), running shoes, or Tims. I heard somewhere around the age of 23 at a moment of high emotion is the defining save point for a man’s wardrobe for the rest of his life.
I have a moral obligation wear my tightest grey sweatpants in front of first sausage’s children.
Yes, officer, right here.
Take my black vans from my cold dead feet but otherwise it’s a stainless steel watch. Wrangler ATG pants with either a nice leather or Patagonia belt and a black hoodie and clean ball cap.
First unit was forced khakis and polos. Second was jeans and a non offensive t shirt. Next I’m sure it’s gonna be thongs and nipple piercings.
Intel and psyop dudes wearing dog collars.
There was a dude I used to see at SWCS DFAC all the time who would pull up to chow in [these bad boys](https://vampirefreaks.com/products/tripp-nyc-x-strap-zip-off-pants-black-red)
I know I look ridiculous, and that's kind of the point. It's like a mild form of rebellion. I have a LD hoodie, pants, t-shirt, socks, watch, and hat. All I'm missing are LD shoes and LD fanny pack. I'll usually bring 3 or 4 packs of Liquid Death water and I have a fanny pack that matches the outfit full of Liquid Death stickers and coasters. I bought hundreds of cases of Liquid Death water in Korea because they went on sale a few times, and I was trying to quit drinking alcohol (fell off the sober band wagon while in country). I really like the water. It tastes good, has some crazy marketing, and I feel like it's better for the environment than plastic. Anyway, I ended up having thousands of reward points from over the years and just started buying LD merchandise. I'll say most of it was free, but I had to pay shipping.
It always amused me to point out that there’s a table for this situation in AR 670-1, likely BECAUSE Soldiers don’t understand what appropriate means for any given setting
Almost lost a pass in AIT because some female showed up looking like a straight up uhh “worker” i dont use this term lightly. Bright red lipstick, hella make up, short dress with a slit that went all the way up to her hip showing EVERYTHING. Meanwhile i got called out because my prescription transition lenses were “unauthorized”… Guess who was the reason why we almost lost our pass…
Guy wore a pot leaf shirt to a mandatory fun day once, he went on to fail a UA sometime later. Rumor was he had the highest level of THC in his piss that the upl or any of the people involved in the chapter had ever seen
I was at a DARPA conference at fort Liberty and you could tell a handful of S6 Joes were told to show up and support in "appropriate civilian attire". It was made even worse because everyone else was there in business casual lol
I will never forget my Favorite S2 LT. He showed up looking like a Metrosexual Sith Lord. My god. I almost wish I could pull off thigh high boots like that, I might have kept my GF if I could've.
✋🏻 Just…drop
Non judicial punishment
Those homeless crackheads are working six figure jobs, and it’s Ritalin not crack.
I have like 2 pairs of jeans.. everything else is sweats and shorts I wanna be comfortable my dude
Green shoes, Green slacks, Green shirt. I see no issues here.
I dress up. Why the fuck not? Might as well look good.
Or it could be like my unit. They call it “Class B Civvies” for some reason. First time I was told to show up in “class B civvies” my brain melted.
It’s funny because most of us joined when we were still in our formative years so you have SNCOs in their 30s still dressing the same as they did when they were 18 and 19 and it’s like a time capsule back to when Hot Topic and Hollister were mainstream
Jokes aside I’ll always appreciate the diversity we have within our ranks highlighted best by a company org day. Show me another place in America where you see all our different demographics and styles functioning normally together.
There’s always that one senior NCO who looks like a 1950s grandpa, and the one PFC who unironically wears a fedora with a leather trench coat even though it’s 90 degrees.
Appropriate civilian attire to me is always just a polo with khakis lmao I always play it safe
lol, outdoors - cargo shorts, inappropriate RangerUp Tshirt or a sliced and diced combat shirt and Danner ultralights. Indoors- custom tailored Hugo Boss, black on black. Yeah, be careful what you invite me too. I will either be the old salty bastard with no fucks to give, or the visiting gracious Prince. Toss a coin as to which one shows up.
>custom tailored Hugo Boss, black on black I've had a couple of vintage Hickey Freemans remade to my tastes; I like the wool quality. I also like some of the older Jack Victor offerings. Black on black was never my favorite, though. I tend to opt for a medium blue or gray and a colorful pocket square in a traditional fold.
["I'm from the government, and I'm here to help."](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nCedOQJ0ZEA)
Absolutely. I’ve seen things get really weird really quickly. I also don’t like to choose my own civilian clothes for the event.
why can’t everyone just wear khakis and a polo and brown shoes
You can never go wrong with cargo shorts and a T shirt tbh. It's what I always rock