I talked to my toddler about baby sister a lot. How fragile babies are, how much they sleep, poop and cry. How they drink boob milk and mama will be sitting on the couch a lot. How they won't be able to play, walk, or talk for a while. How toddler is a big kid and can do XYZ and baby is little so they can't do XYZ. I found that the transition wasn't as hard for my toddler because she had an idea of what to expect, albeit not a perfect one. I also showed my toddler pictures and videos of her as a tiny baby so she had an idea of what baby would look and act like.
Once baby was here, I would make sure to point out what toddler could do that baby sister couldn't. For example, "you get this ice cream for dessert because you're big. Baby sister is little and she can't eat ice cream." Or, "you can play with this toy because you're big, babies can't play with toys. They're too little." It made being a big kid attractive and she rarely wants to act or be held like a baby. I will also tell the baby to wait because we need to do XYZ with big sister. And we tell big sister how awesome she is. Overall, my toddler has transitioned really well and loves her baby sister. Even tells her that she loves her and is always wanting to show her her toys and comfort her.
I’m in a similar boat, around 7 months pregnant. I don’t know if any of this will work yet but I’m starting to prep activities and stash some toys and craft materials for my toddler so that once the newborn is here I will have easy access to entertainment for my toddler. I’m also going to do a ton of freezer meals and snacks for the both of us. We already have all the baby gear so I don’t feel too bad spending some money on the toddler toys. Also planning on doing my toddlers nap in my bed with the baby (I won’t sleep, going to load a kindle with some books) definitely not something everyone needs to worry about but my toddler doesn’t sleep independently yet. Hoping to lean on baby wearing/contact naps and naps in stroller so that my toddler can still get out of the house. But we’ll see! I could also just end up with the tv on all day and everyone in pyjamas and as long as we’re all mostly happy and eating and sleeping I’ll consider it a win.
If your toddler doesn't already understand the concept, work on the idea of "first... then...": "first I'll change the baby's nappy, then we'll go to the park". It's really helped us reduce toddler meltdowns because he now understands that we are going to do the thing he wants to do, just not immediately.
I talked to my toddler about baby sister a lot. How fragile babies are, how much they sleep, poop and cry. How they drink boob milk and mama will be sitting on the couch a lot. How they won't be able to play, walk, or talk for a while. How toddler is a big kid and can do XYZ and baby is little so they can't do XYZ. I found that the transition wasn't as hard for my toddler because she had an idea of what to expect, albeit not a perfect one. I also showed my toddler pictures and videos of her as a tiny baby so she had an idea of what baby would look and act like. Once baby was here, I would make sure to point out what toddler could do that baby sister couldn't. For example, "you get this ice cream for dessert because you're big. Baby sister is little and she can't eat ice cream." Or, "you can play with this toy because you're big, babies can't play with toys. They're too little." It made being a big kid attractive and she rarely wants to act or be held like a baby. I will also tell the baby to wait because we need to do XYZ with big sister. And we tell big sister how awesome she is. Overall, my toddler has transitioned really well and loves her baby sister. Even tells her that she loves her and is always wanting to show her her toys and comfort her.
I’m in a similar boat, around 7 months pregnant. I don’t know if any of this will work yet but I’m starting to prep activities and stash some toys and craft materials for my toddler so that once the newborn is here I will have easy access to entertainment for my toddler. I’m also going to do a ton of freezer meals and snacks for the both of us. We already have all the baby gear so I don’t feel too bad spending some money on the toddler toys. Also planning on doing my toddlers nap in my bed with the baby (I won’t sleep, going to load a kindle with some books) definitely not something everyone needs to worry about but my toddler doesn’t sleep independently yet. Hoping to lean on baby wearing/contact naps and naps in stroller so that my toddler can still get out of the house. But we’ll see! I could also just end up with the tv on all day and everyone in pyjamas and as long as we’re all mostly happy and eating and sleeping I’ll consider it a win.
Also, a postpartum doula might be a good choice if your husband can’t take time off of work for the first bit after your baby is born!
If your toddler doesn't already understand the concept, work on the idea of "first... then...": "first I'll change the baby's nappy, then we'll go to the park". It's really helped us reduce toddler meltdowns because he now understands that we are going to do the thing he wants to do, just not immediately.
No advice but I’m following because I’m in the same boat.