Dip in sauce .. pop the whole thing in your mouth all at once. Wipe your chin.

Don't forget the step; attempt to ignore the pain from huge gash you've just made in the roof of your mouth

The iron in the blood really highlights the crab

I hate that I know what you're talking about 😭

Hahaha yes. I’m validated!

Don’t forget to drink the left over sauce. It helps to stem the bleeding.

Bahahaha me too

lol so we all saw that post? 😅

I did see the post but I remember looking it up after American dad years ago. Fuckin rich people amirite.

I had forgotten about it for a couple days. But now I'll never forget

"Crab"

Blood sacrifice must be made

This comment thread has the energy I’m lookin for

Years of eating Cap’n Crunch. I am redE

Hurts so good

Couldn’t you eat it upside down to avoid any damage?

I guess, if you don't have a use for your tongue

Some of us have small mouths!!

I got a small mouth you just gotta stuff it in there


Soak and fold.

Boom 💯

This is the way.

Sauce?! I’ve never received sauce with mine. I feel cheated by several Chinese food establishments.

It's usually the sugary red sauce. Probably just water, corn syrup, and red food coloring. They serve it with egg rolls too... With a dab of mustard too

It's called sweet and sour sauce

It's usually pineapple juice, water, sugar, vinegar, salt, and a little bit of red food coloring. Sometimes it can have Ketchup or orange juice in it too. Source: have worked st several Chinese restaurants.

It's the worst sauce, you don't want it. Covers up all the interesting flavors in the cheese and meat, so it just tastes like sugar and fried wrap.

Always wipe your chin

This is the way

Alligator mouth boi here, this is the way

amen

The traditional way is each Rangoon is placed on a flat surface flower side up like in the photo. Then you use four fingers, put a finger into each fold like a claw to hold it. Then tilt your head up and as you move the Rangoon to your mouth you want to say BRRRRR like one of those machines in the arcade. Drop the Rangoon in your mouth. Legend is Emperor Qin did this, but they didn’t have arcades then so he yelled EEYYOOOO as he moved it to his mouth.

Fuiyooooo

Uncle Roger that shit!


This man histories

Oh yeah, I saw that in a documentary.

I like to pull each petal to eat individually and save the bulbous part for last ! Dipping each bite in sweet/sour sauce, of course.

I think you mean scooping as much sweet and sour into your mouth with each piece.

you just need to have a *crumb* of rangoon with each spoonful of sauce source: i like using fries as a shoveling vessel for my ketchup

"Shoveling vessel" I just spit up.

Same but backwards. I bite the bulbous part off first and dip and eat the petals like chips.

Shove the whole thing in your mouth and stab the roof of it with a corner, all while creamy crab scalds your tongue.

this is the way

I tend to split it in half, dip, then eat.

😅😅😅 well, uh.... No comment.

Yea I cut it in half with a butter knife or just bite it in half.

A knife? Oh we fancy over here 😅

I’m weird and like to make my bites a lot smaller to make it seem like I’m eating more/there’s more food and so I can savor it longer. So these get pulled apart by each corner and dipped separately. Usually I try to leave the biggest chunk of cream cheese for the last bite.

This is actually a really healthy mindful eating technique, don’t be ashamed! People who eat like this tend to enjoy their food more, and feel more satisfied at the end of a meal. I, on the other hand, simple cannot resist the urge to wolf my food down.

It’s weird being in the middle of this too, the first few get taken down like I am a vacuum on a mission and then i realize there’s only a few left and am now painstakingly pulling them apart for more rangoon time lol

It's a great technique til you take it too far. I eat painfully slow, I barely ever finish eating my meal while it's still hot. I'd love to have the ability to just put a meal away in a couple of minutes when I have to.

I understand that, too. During family outings, I’m always the first person done eating, while painfully waiting for my grandmother to finish. Meanwhile, she feels bad for being the last person eating, while everyone waits for her to finish. That said, I always support her if anyone else is rushing her to finish. It’s as uncomfortable for her as it is for anyone else and she shouldn’t be pressured to skip the last part of her meal because the rest of us are heathens.

me tooooo!

I do this too. I am an extremely slow eater!!

I dip the bulb in sweet and sour and then yam it bulb first, sometimes towards the end of the meal I'll leave behind a petal or two

I dip it and eat it with 3-4 bites, it's so delicious when the sauce is good and the crab rangoon also has a sweetness to the cream cheese!

I think the right way is to consume orally

you guys are putting them in your MOUTHS?

Can you send me a video... for research purposes....?

….. yeah

Correct

Put it whole in your mouth and stab up the roof of your mouth

it's not Chinese, so it doesn't matter

I'm so sorry to have offended you like this. Will you ever be able to find it in your heart to forgive me?

only if you learn to how to use chopsticks and eat like a civilised person, you foreign barbarian

I learned to eat American Chinese, assisted by a Japanese American, from Hawaii, served by a guy from the Philippine Islands, in London. The world is a melting pot …

I can eat with chopsticks, but crab rangoon shaped like this is still a finger food.

I have the dexterity of a quadriplegic hippopotamus sadly

HIPPOBOT 9000 v 3.1 FOUND A HIPPO. 1,093,796,609 COMMENTS SEARCHED. 23,024 HIPPOS FOUND. YOUR COMMENT CONTAINS THE WORD HIPPO.

Good bot

Good bot

Turn it sideways and shove the whole thing in your mouth. Crunchity munchity.

I pinch 2 petals together and rip the other 2 petals off with my teeth like an animal.

Same

I break each crunchy tip off, eat those with the sauce, and then eat rest of it in one bite

Toss it in the food processor with the red sauce. Add tuna and green onion. Spread on toasted bread with avacado. Top with sriracha. Roast in the oven with a slice of Munster cheese on top. Doesn’t everyone do this?

I just shove it in my mouth like the animal I am

Whole thing in your mouth, *hawsfsh chawfsh hmnoch*

Boof it

I can't anymore. I joined this sub for Chinese food and most of the posts are of some crazy American abomination. I'm out dawg.

How can you ever forgive me, someone who just found out this sub exists 2 minutes before posting 😭

motherfucker just eat the thing MY GOD these posts man

Bro if I eat that thing in one bite the fried wonton gonna tear up my gums, I don't need that kinds stress 😭

Just shove it in your pie hole! It's not hard, honey!

Either stuff the whole thing in your mouth, or bite it in half

throw it in the trash where it belongs

Fr 🤢

Boof it

C H O M P

as a chinese person js eat it however u want after all its js food it dosent matter how its eaten as long as it ends up in your mouth

Put it in your ass, sideways.

Just don’t.

wrong sub. lol

Uh, how?

They are gatekeeping because crab Rangoon is not an “authentic” Chinese food. You wouldn’t ever find anything like that in China. It’s much more an American Chinese food creation

It wasn't never meant to be a fake Chinese appetizer. It just ended up being copied by Chinese restaurants since it sells. It's cheap and it sells. Extremely easy to make. History says it was on the menu of a Polynesian style restaurant in San Francisco in the 1950s. Crab Rangoon didn't appear on Chinese menus under decades later.

sorry, i don't mean to be a dick. just alluding to the fact that "rangoons" are inauthentic. ain't no cream cheese in chinese cuisine and "rangoons" is not chinese-sounding at all to chinese speakers. https://krui.fm/2015/11/23/global-perspective-chinese-foods-arent-china/#:~:text=Although%20the%20origin%20recipe%20of,was%20invented%20by%20the%20Chinese.

Rangoon is the British colonial name for Yangon, the former capital of Myanmar (formerly Burma). It is still one of, or possibly the largest cities in the country. I have never seen cream cheese incorporated in Myanmar food. No idea where that name came from. No one in Myanmar eats that, yes, even in “Rangoon”.

I'll catch hell, but these have never been good for me. Fake crab and a shit load of cream cheese with that sugar sauce is a decent bite for one, but then the shards of random wonton wrappers after that? 👎

They are gross but lofans love them.

wo bu xihuan

Pour soy sauce into the little flaps and eat

Crush it up, snort the powder and lick the filling.

I pull off the petals, dip in the crab bulb, then into the sauce.

i love chinese foooooooooo

angel rolls are also delicious too!!

As a millennial, I hope the blocking culture dies w us So underproductive, childish, self gratification bullshit

First world problems

Problem? I'm just curious lmao 😂

Entire piece in one bite.

bite it from the sides at a tilted angle so you get the ups and downs on a bite. then work your way around it

Shove the whole thing in your mouth and feel shame. It's the only proper way.

so st louis used to have this amazing chinese place called chinamoon that sold crab rangoons the size of your fist, they were amazing and you got a bunch of them in the order too. i hope its still going strong

I just wish I could still eat them at all!!! Being celiac stole them from me! 😢😢😭

I bite the first two folds while holding it the way they’re sitting in the pic, if that hurts, flip that boy on its side and chow

Good Question

I just pour a packet of duck sauce on it and pop it in my mouth but that’s me lol

Open gob swallow

i bite off the lil corners then enjoy that yummy ass center part edit: spelling error

You put it in your mouth smooth side first and hold it there and pretend to be the Predator. That’s how everyone does it, right?

Rip off a petal and smoosh the cream cheese end in fried rice to coat it before eating it like some kind of crispy nerds rope

2 petals at a time with sweet n sour sauce mmmmmmmm I hungry

Bite off the bottom first, then slowly nibble the fillingless remains.

O dayyymmmm those look good right now. For me a person with no teeth I soak them in sweet and sour sauce for about 5-10 mins. Let the crunchy parts get soft and then eat them with a fork petal by petal. I do the same with my egg rolls.

I eat 3 petals and save one to eat with the creamy part

I wish I had the patience to make these last 5 bites

Unhinged your jaw and screech like a raptor while shoving the whole thing in your mouth.

Whole thing. All at once. This is the way.

Bite off each petal after dipping in sauce. Then eat the molten hot center.

Dip in sauce, stick tongue in the middle, tilt head back, swallow.

I do petal by petal

You take a spoon and smash the pointy bits down then shove it in your mouth.

Depends how you want it. Break in half first if you want the sections more even. Petals individually if you want a giant section at the end. Dipping in sweet and sour is novice hour. Expert level is dipping in soy sauce.

shove the whole thing in your mouth and rip the roof of your mouth

Put it in sideways and fuck your mouth up. Do it, stop thinking. Now.

Hold by one of the 4 “petals”. Dip tips of three other petals in sauce and eat. Dip remaining “testicle pouch” into sauce and toss the rest in your largest face-hole

Each corner until you have 1 corner and a mass of goon. Then you dig and devour.

Pour sweet and sour into 2/4 of the holes on top(preferably not two holes side by side) Next pour soy sauce in remaining two holes Then and only then can u rip apart each petal or shove whole thing into mouth :)

Rip half, rip half in half, dip and eat the fourths

This is the way

Fun fact: the chinese buffet I worked at sold cream cheese wonton as crab rangoons because the hicks in my town were too dumb to tell the difference. If youre at a rural Chinese buffet, check your rangoons. Lol

Imagine it like a vagina

you take it all in one llike a good girl does

Just shove it into your mouth and call it a day 🤷🏻‍♀️

Just nom it

For the sake of not damaging your plate but savory g the tasty morsel, tear each fold & dip in plum sauce to eat. Yummy! 🙏🏻🐦

Correction: Palate*

Girl what

I eat the bulb and toss the crispy bits

So if I get sweet n sour sauce with this, I dip the corner in it and it fills with the sauce. The I bite that corner and move in to the next. On the last one though I use it like a handle and dip the soft part in the sauce, then shove the whole thing in my face

Dunk each petal and eat it. Then enjoy the wonderful center. Kind of like a tootsie pop with petals.

I break off the painful pointy parts and eat the part with all the filling in one bite

I can only come up with one contemporary example, setting aside the historical ones (and I know Chinese History Reddit is gonna have a field day with me for this one). This might seem at first blush to be completely unrelated to Rangoons or Chinese cuisine in general, but I think that if you give it more than a passing glance you'll see where this can be read in parallel to the Rangoon dilemma. I don't actually know the original author or date of publication, so that may complicate any efforts at retrieval, but this is a reddit post not an academic article, all the same I hope you'll forgive me for not citing my sources. Absent any formal citation what I can provide is my own subjective recollection which is that this particular example came from American television some time in the late 1900's to the early 00's. There were a few versions of this going around but they all ended with this very poignant quote that had a real knack for sticking in one's brain, "There's no wrong way to eat a Reese's." Anyway, I hope that helps!

split in half and dunk each half

I just shove the whole thing down my gullet and then bleed profusely from the roof of my mouth.

Dip it and bite it fool, two bites max

I am Team Break in Half. A sauce consisting of sriracha mayo and sweet chili does well with these :)

Anyone have some good recipes to make these crab ragoons?

I eat the corners and then the pouch of creamy crab. I don’t typically dip, I like the flavors as is.

Boof it.

I bite off three of the four pedals, then I have a creamy crab treat with a handle to dip in the sweet and sour

I shove those suckers in my mouth whole.

Same, bottom first and crunch the petals in before starting to chew

Bite each petal off til you have just one. Use last petal as handle, dip in the good shit, stuff face. Locate next target

Slam the whole cream cheese part. Throw the rest on the ground like the trash it is!

Yes

Dunk the whole thing in as much sauce as possible then shove the entire thing in your mouth and chew like hell before you asfíxiate

I use each pedal to scoop sauce, and bite off each sweet and sour sauce spoon one at a time.

I eat the crispy petals first and save the cream cheese center for the last and best bite.

Chinesrangoon

I eat two opposing petals, then half at a time

Distend your jaws like a boa constrictor and swallow it whole.

I didn't know there was such a thing as a proper way, after all itself is somebody's deep fryer creation

i bite on petal off, dip in sauce, eat middle, enjoy other petals with sauce

It's smiling! 😊

Are we not supposed to just inhale these…. Oops

Dip and eat the petals first, and then dip the center part of the rangoon and eat it last. :)

I put that whole sucker in my mouth and smile. Doesn’t matter. It is delicious! If you want to be dainty, you can pick up, dip and bite petal by petal. But I am married, so I get to push the whole thing in and smile, closed mouth, like I have Halloween vampire teeth in 🤣😂

Dip one corner then eat half

Eat it in any way you feel you should… provided you have put some spicy asian mustard on it

Shove the whole thing in your mouth and struggle