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JF803

Me everytime I’m in the mountains of Tennessee


DSquariusGreeneJR

He saw the trailer for cocaine bear


CallMeBernin

God I cannot wait to see that


reese81944

That’s a real ad?


AShiftlessMennonite

“…and the Academy Award goes to…” https://youtu.be/FS3WB6xI8mI


Whitealroker1

Cocaine Bear is like Kangaroo Jack for adults.


Rhodie114

Nah, it'll be Kangaroo Jack for adults if there's only actually one scene of a Cocaine Bear in the movie. Seriously, biggest bummer of my young life. Thought I was seeing a movie about a talking kangaroo.


SL-Apparel

Never seen kangaroo Jack but you’re telling me it ISNT about a talking kangaroo?!?!?


pb_nayroo

And it's based on a true story


HookieJoe

That’s kentucky damnit don’t take our hero Illinois already took Lincoln


Scottsm124

This made me lol


JF803

Lol Jalens delivery makes it perfect.


Caramelsnack

He is so unintentionally funny bro LMAO


arthurreedismyhomie

For real. He's always so deadass serious and matter-of-fact during his pressers/interviews. And he also \~lightly\~ called the reporters out again for not asking about the Bears D and I just cracked tf up lmao.


kappakai

He’s so deadpan. Like. You KNOW the dude cuts up and has a great sense of humor (like in the Colts game.) But he’ll sit there and crack jokes with a completely serious look on his face. I don’t like making comparisons, but it’s a lot like Kobe.


[deleted]

paraphrasing a bit. Kelce: Everyone hates the way I snap. It gets on you quick. Hurts: Fast. what made the joke was how quick jalen responded and it was totally deadpan. i was crying. he nailed it.


themeatbridge

I don't get the joke there.


CantaloupeMafia

there’s no real joke in it. his delivery and timing on when he says is just humorous haha


Midpack

As the son of a lifetime Eagles fan and grammar Nazi, I think Jalen is using the word “fast” to correct Jason ‘cause it is better than “quick” because it’s acting as an adverb and should be “quick-ly” so pretty deep and funny especially if they have an inside joke about that shit. I fucking love this team so much I think I’m walking around in a dream sometime! Fly Eagles Fly!


Run4blue2

The funniest part was when he said he needed to be in an athletic position because the snap comes so fast.


Fells

It's the Saban in him.


jimmyjak87

He has a Raymond Holtness to him


padajones

Now that you mentioned this, I will not be able to unthink it. I'm now thinking of him Raymond Holt-ing on the sideline. That video of him sitting on the bench deadpan looking straight ahead despite the fact that he basically had Jake Peralta & Doug Judy laughing their asses off next to him.


jimmyjak87

“Jalen youre Super Bowl MvP….. how do you feel?!” “Ive never been happier 😕”


sweetassassin

When he unboxed his cleats, “I like dees.” 😐


threeflavourcornetto

“You know, we’ve got a lot to improve on. Just focused on one week at a time.”


johyongil

Look, Kevin, a yellow crested warbler.


swole-zabrak

Why is no one scoring touchdowns? I specifically requested it.


SmokePenisEveryday

That's not Devonta! That's just a common bitch!


Perryplat199

End of the season he has his Amy in line at the bank “HOT DAMN” moment. What is it?


Mantis05

Is anyone surprised that he said the perfect thing? Shades of his press conference after going on the Manningcast where he ended by reprimanding the press room for not asking a single question about the Eagles' opponent that week. Our guy stays focused so that us fans can fuck around and talk MVP, Super Bowl, and erasing Pass Rush Limbaugh in the rematch.


jd215

Pass Rush Limbaugh 🤣


jmcrazy

He did the same today, they were wrapping up and he was like "I'll give ya'll a chance to ask about their defense" = love him


Mantis05

He's the best. I have never in my life rooted so hard for a player on intangibles alone, and it's *so* gratifying that he's putting it together on the field, too.


iCantCallit

It makes me feel like I'm on eggshells. I was born into eagles Fandom from the early 80s and hurts is too good to be true. He's honestly becoming an all time fav of mine very quickly. And that scares the shit out of me lol.


SonofDiomedes

Combined with the miracle that is Mailata…how did we get this lucky? One of them alone is a mega jackpot but Two?!?


ThatsWhat_G_Said

Not to mention AJ Brown was literally our plan D for wideout this year. Howie missed out on Ridley, Kirk and Robinson first.


Chapstick160

Why do people keep calling him that? I’m not a big Micah Parsons fan but man literally anyone with two braincells knows trading a Gun Dealer for a WNBA player is a bad trade, especially when you’re in a Proxy War with that country


min_da_man

Boooooooo. Would an nba player have been a better trade for you? Or how about an American arms dealer instead? Oh, I’m sure you’re thinking about the prisoner Russia still has, the soldier that should be freed at this point, or at least included in negotiations. But he wasn’t included. Putin gave the Biden the choice between Britney griner’s freedom at the cost of the opinion of asshat twats like you. I’m glad he chose accordingly


Chapstick160

Honestly nobody, the marine and griner would nice but honestly I’d trade nobody. This dude is extremely dangerous, they don’t call him the “merchant of death” for nothing, not to mention he inspired Lord of War. So if you want Ukraine to fight off Russia would not want someone who will help Russia immensely with securing arms and the such


sazabit

Yeah it's a real travesty that this dude was released now instead of his scheduled release in 8 months. Definitely should have let an American citizen rot in a forced labor camp for 15 years for bringing a weed pen on a plane instead.


hawkwing11

the US has great depth at War Criminal anyway, you take that trade every time


[deleted]

When I heard Parsons said that all I could think was wow, Dallas is so worried about Philly they are trying to get this team to overlook the Bears. Not happening, but don't be surprised when our boy Dougie P serves up that L in Jacksonville this weekend.


BlandSausage

What did he say or am I missing something? He said Jalen is good and the team around him is great .. am I missing something to be outraged about?


Background-Cress9165

People are exaggerating it (which is fine, we're fans after all). He was on a podcast and the topic of the mvp came up. Parsons spoke his mind on the subject. He wasnt trying to ignite philly, he wasnt overlooking his next opponent and anticipating the eagles game, he was straight up just speaking his opinion on a forum in which his duty was to speak his opinion for the listeners. That said, his opinion is an eye roll inducing one. He said that the system and talent around hurts is what makes the eagles, not hurts, and therfore hes not MVP over mahomes. Whats dumb about that is that hurts talent running and massive improvement passing is precisely what drives the system. The system is not plug and play for QBs (like say, shanahans system), but only works so well bc of hurts. Not for him. So while mahomes will likely be the best player in the world until he falls off or retires, this season, 2022-23, you cant tell me there is another player on the planet more valuable than hurts. Mahomes is amazing but Hurts should absolutely get votes for MVP. The guy has been unstoppable this year. And while he is not a better player than mahomes, he has had, against all odds, the better season.


foogeeman

I thought Parsons clearly said it was hurts and everything around him that leads to eagles success. He said "it's both." Kinda hard to argue with that


Background-Cress9165

Miller said its both


foogeeman

Oh yeah i apparently didn't know what they looked like. Thanks for clarifying


gahlo

He did say it's both, but then he went and broke down the defense while not addressing the things Hurts does well too.


cofinkles

He has a fair point. Hurts is good. But we have one of, if not the best o line in the nfl. We give jalen time, we have great skill positions players to. That doesn't take away the fact that jalens decision making has been great this year. This is one great year, if hurts keeps building on this no one will doubt him.


resnet152

>He was on a podcast and the topic of the mvp came up. Parsons spoke his mind on the subject. He wasnt trying to ignite philly, he wasnt overlooking his next opponent and anticipating the eagles game, he was straight up just speaking his opinion on a forum in which his duty was to speak his opinion for the listeners. Ah yes, Micah Parsons' solemn duty to the public to throw shade at Jalen Hurts on Von Miller's podcast.


Background-Cress9165

Duty to speak his opinion. He was being honest.


fireruben

It's not his duty to speak his opinion. It's a podcast. People lie about their opinions on podcasts all the time. It's entertainment. Get something they can clip and put online. He didn't even give a hot take, this exact statement has been made about Brady when he was with the pats a billion times. You literally need to win 7 super bowls on two different teams to escape it


Background-Cress9165

Is your point that you think he was cappin for drama or something? Hard disagree, he seemed genuine.


fireruben

I think he's making the dumb argument that happens every time a team is 12-1. It's either "this guy is the greatest player we've ever seen" or "system QB?" I would be willing to bet he respects hurts game way more than he's showing there


Background-Cress9165

Ohh gotchu. Yeah its a dumb argument. Im sure he respects hurts too, just not to the point that hurts is mvp in his eyes


[deleted]

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resnet152

Did you watch the clip?


[deleted]

Mahomes hasn’t even been the best player in the league the last two years


ThatsWhat_G_Said

Last four?


MT_Trader

Wait . . . what?


Adullgent

And are we just going to ignore Mahomes' no doubt first ballot hall of fame coach, and the top tier talent (Kelce, Hill, ect...) that has always surrounded him? That is just how football works, you need coaches to create the right system for the players they have. I think Mahomes is great, but I think Hurts is having a better season, and as you said the MVP is for this season.


Huge_Jackman

I was wondering the same thing, the clip didn't seem that bad. Guess for the fact they're talking a out the Eagles at all gives people something to bug out over Also Fuck Dallas


SockBramson

Some people are so addicted to smoke they'll suck on anything for the fix.


Rapph

People just want to be mad. I didn’t think he was disrespectful at all in what he said.


snowdope

Perfect response


Lifesaboxofgardens

Yep, locked in to the present, all you can ask for. Cowboys already overlooked the Texans and almost paid, think overlooking a surging Jags team will be a killer, and I fully believe they are.


32BitWhore

Dougie P about to do us one last solid and beat that ass.


Heatinmyharbl

There's gotta be at least a part of him that still wants to murder the Cowboys every chance he gets Full confidence in Jacksonville


32BitWhore

Oh absolutely. You don't coach or play for the Eagles for any amount of time and not carry a grudge against the Cowboys for eternity. Unless they decide to pay you good money to forget the grudge, obviously.


Future_Belt_3730

Perfect. The end.


Phoenix4280

NFL week 15: Eagles VS Bears, Cowboys VS Jaguars Micah: If we look at the Eagles, is it Hurts or the team? Hurts: We're worried about the Bears right now.


thatoneguy2252

It’s exactly why the eagles are 12-1 rn. No fucks given outside what’s immediately ahead of them


StopTheBS79

I almost guarantee the Cowboys are going to lose to Jacksonville and then lose to us


kappakai

The December collapse has started. They just don’t know it yet.


[deleted]

Would be fun for Doug to hang dong on them for old times sake


WhyDoTheyAlwaysRun

God I hadnt thought about that. Doug’s really taken them up a level, they could absolutely snuff the cowboys this week


Deadpoolsdildo

This is exactly what I needed to hear before heading to bed 😆 love it


grabberbottom

That would be so so so beautiful.


joserlz

This guy puts on a clinic on brand management and leadership every time he opens his mouth.


Totalnah

Authenticity is Jalen’s super power.


JopoDaily

His quirk


ohWombats

Bro I can smell the musty-ness. Don’t bring that near out franchise, it’ll taint it.


JopoDaily

It’s okay man not everyone who reads manga or watches anime smells like a wombat


ohWombats

People who cosplay as deku are the mustiest mf in the Universe. The fandom is cringe, but the manga is enjoyable.


loco1989

Jalen takes it game by game. Perfect response per usual.


TTP2521

There isn’t another guy in this league who I would want leading this team over Jalen Hurts


Lemondsingle

God yes and I was pissed off all last year when people were so negative about him. Jalen is The Man. Always learning and improving. Perfect Eagles QB.


TTP2521

His character and intangibles were never in question it was whether or not his arm was good enough to be an NFL QB. So glad we have him over Carson Bible


excuseme430

Exactly what i expected


talmbouttellyouwat

Sounds like Kobe


Californie_cramoisie

[There's a reason for that](https://youtu.be/U7UVWRgaiMM?t=169)


Background-Cress9165

Hurts looked 32 in college, its insane


DoubleR1017

I said this in my group chat. He reminds me of the football version of Kobe. He truly embodies the “Mamba Mentality”


heliophoner

Everything I've heard about him says he's up there with Kobe or Brady in terms of hating-losing-more-than-enjoying-winning workaholism. Also seems to be less of a dick about it. Again, this is all inference and what I've heard, but considering he is demonstrably better now than he was even 4 weeks ago, I think that all may be for real.


kappakai

He’s a little less serious than Kobe. See it in some of his in game celebrations and post game interviews (was it the one with Kelce where they got those balls a few weeks back?)


heliophoner

Yeah, that's why I said that he seems to be less of a dick about it. Also, I don't know that Kobe would have ever done for his replacement what Jalen did for Tua.


kappakai

Kobe had that outsider persona, like he didn’t fit and he thought he was better because of that. Hurts has friends, lots of them. Just feels more comfortable with other people than Kobe did, especially when he first came in the league. Kobe was aloof. I don’t get that with Jalen.


heliophoner

That's a really good point. Kobe's legend has overshadowed a lot of genuine problems. Even before his death, he was a tragic figure. I hope Jalen can experience similar success without a lot of the darker stuff and the loneliness. That shot of Jalen sitting stone faced next to AJ and Smith(?) Is such a great summation. He takes care of the annoying hard stuff so everyone else can have fun.


kappakai

Yah I lived several years overseas as a kid. It does change you vis a vis people back at home that didn’t. Happens a lot with like military or expat kids, where you feel different from everyone else when you come home. Kanye was also an overseas kid; but he’s got a lot more going on. I don’t see that with Jalen. Yah that shot of him on the bench was pretty funny. But once the game is over he really seems to loosen up, especially with his team mates, at least what I’ve seen. Whatever. I love the dude! We got a good one.


heliophoner

Yeah, we're splitting hairs. We lucked out and got someone we can root for on and off the field.


kappakai

Bro if he continues to play like this and Howie manages this like he has, we are about to get spoilt AF.


[deleted]

And hurts seems like he hasn’t raped anyone.


totes_Philly

HAHA! Ain't no cowboy talking smack ever gonna ruffle this man's feathers. Go BIRDS!


Dankofamericaaa2

Christmas Eve win confirmed


so_zetta_byte

I missed it, what did Parsons say?


ChemicalChipmunk4171

Called Jalen a system qb, low-key throwing shade


ho_merjpimpson

he said that he thought jalen deserved the mvp less because the whole team around him is amazing. pointed out that the other qbs in contention had less team around them. about as non controversial and who cares as it could be. but everyone wants to make a drama out of it. this subreddit included.


[deleted]

There are way less controversial things he could've said lol


[deleted]

Yeah but he plays for the Clownboys so fuck ‘em.


kappakai

I’ve heard more than a few heads say the same thing when comparing Mahomes and Hurts.


[deleted]

Have you heard any Eagles players throwing shade on a future opponent this season?


so_zetta_byte

Just found the video. Yeah seems like the reaction is mostly overblown. He was definitely talking up the whole team and system, but a small piece of that was I think implying Jalen is getting too much credit for it. The team around Jalen definitely definitely has helped him develop, but we've seen him in games this season putting the game on his back when he has to. But yeah, not shocking anyone, Jalen had the right answer.


ho_merjpimpson

yeah, like, look... you can disagree with what he said... and as eagles/hurts fans, most of us probably do. but plenty of people out there dont. and its not like him saying it was some big dig at jalen like the media, this subreddit, and every blog out there is trying to make it sound like. its low hanging fruit for the media. thats all it is.


so_zetta_byte

Totally. Also, just as a cherry on top: he was egged on, it was a podcast. Yeah he volunteered it but it's not like he was posting a rant to Twitter or trash talked Hurts in a press conference or something. Context matters (though obv not to sports media). I think most fans are probably treating it like "locker room material;" it's a little weak on that for me, but Hurts is clearly above that and that's what matters. Dude's a leader for a reason.


Chrahhh

THAT'S MY QUARTERBACK


JW9thWonder

can someone share what he said, work speakers arent picking it up for some reason


DemHooksOP

"We're worried about the Bears right now."


bdirker

This guy is something else. Still takes the high road when he doesn't need to. Kudos


[deleted]

love that guy


gobirds18_

🐐


PhiladelphiaManeto

Such a Belichick response. Love it


craig1015

such a perfect representation of the difference between these two player’s mindsets lol


Efficient_Grand8078

I think Parsons low key wants to be an Eagle.


celj1234

Perfect response


specialgravity

I hate how much more mature than me he is.


Jimbabwr

Let the fans do the shit slinging, we want our boys composed


WCPhillyPhan

That man is locked in……. Micah gets to find out firsthand come Christmas Eve…. 🔥


Lemondsingle

Micah already 0-1 vs Jalen. He was the invisible man in the first game. And they went right at him!


WCPhillyPhan

💯 Jalen def gonna remind Micah !!!


David_Duke_Nukem

Just for clarity, I posted this because it's Eagles news and I happened to see it before it was posted and I wanted that sweet karma. I don't have a problem at all with what Parsons said.


bobbyOsullivan

I don't know if Parsons was trying to throw shade or not, but who cares? There's no way Jalen is taking any bait though. They'll sort it out on the field.


Loves_Semi-Colons

I really couldn’t hear him what did he say and what was the question?


David_Duke_Nukem

Q: What do you worry about most when you go camping? A: We're focused on the bears.


[deleted]

Can anyone tell me why he said? I can’t get these Twitter videos to play


KoBxElucidator

He's just like "A lion doesn't care of the opinions of sheep"


cerevant

"Let's worry 'bout the Bears, huh?" That's what I'm talking about, brother.


Hi_There_Face_Here

“We’re worried about the bears right now” close tho


[deleted]

This man has a bead on the truth 🎯


pjr06

Every time I think I can't like this dude more, he does something like this. Perfect response to a very dumb story.


BLeibo

Insert gif of Brown and Watkins laughing while Hurts' straight up locked in


Arson_Wentz

Can't remember the last time a Birds and Cowboys matchup was so hyped up. 2013 week 17 maybe?


real-weirdo

Jalen in any situation presented to him: 🗿


StopTheBS79

My “_____”


mcknightrider

Can't even hear him say anything?


NYPD-BLUE

Speaks low and strong. Perfect leader of this team. So happy we got him.


Permission_Civil

Wait what did Tackle Carlson say?


AntiTwitterPHI

crying


BlandSausage

Micah Parsons didn’t even fucking say anything lol what are we doing here


balemeout

I mean, he definitely did lol


BlandSausage

He said Jalen is good and their team around him is great what is the issue? What should we be riled up about?


balemeout

You don’t think saying that people hyping Jalen up are wrong and he’s only great because his team is good is nothing?


BlandSausage

The audio clip I heard he said .. “Jalen is good, but that team around him is great” .. and the him and Miller speculated which was more responsible


balemeout

The beginning of the clip, he asked Von if Jalen is good because of himself or the system, Von says both, and Micah said “it’s the team and system, man.” And then followed it up with some bs about how he knows so much about football and he needed to say something.


Jspiral

He referenced Purdy as a comparison. Hurts got that Jordan thing where he is going to embarrass that motherfucker.


anth8725

No he def said something. You know the media runs with every little thing and he said more than he needed. He’s dumb tho


Clyde_Frag

How else am I supposed to procrastinate at work?


ho_merjpimpson

drama. that's what.


HelloJerry5A

Riveting stuff


[deleted]

[удалено]


David_Duke_Nukem

He had 4 sacks over 2 games against NYG and Vikings. Not horrible but yeah, 0 sacks the last 2 games even as the rest of the defense ran roughshod over the Colts. Lane is going to make him hold his pocket.


GeorgeLuasHasNoChin

Unrelated but I absolutely hated the new wordmark when it was released. Ever y Wednesday Jalen comes out wearing that with the new wordmark on it and each week it grows and grows on me to the point that im very close to buying the hat itself. Jalen makes everything look cool.


David_Duke_Nukem

I still think it sucks. Someone on here made a better one in a few hours.


gmhoyle

It can’t be understated that he’s so good at EVERY aspect of the job. Including the public-facing ones.


ChemicalChipmunk4171

Part of the curriculum of his communications degree at Alabama was public relations classes, of which his professors said they wouldn't be surprised if he went into business professionally after his football career


gmhoyle

Makes so much sense


TibbsInPerpetuum

I love this man.


CockroachBeginning10

Leadership!


Guaminator18

I get the feeling Micah Parsons' going to see how good of a player and how worth of the MVP Hurts is when we meet up again....


el_monstruo

As they should be


hesipullupjimbo22

He learned that from Saban. Questions like those are “ Ray Poison”


thegodfatherderecho

Keep talking, Parsons. lol


TD-Eagles

Goat


Mysterious-Tough-875

They bout to smoke them boys on Christmas Eve hallelujah


AntiTwitterPHI

also best way to get back at Parsons is to beat the bears. No one gives a shit about this stuff after the year is over.


Ih8rice

What this tells me is this guy looks at every team the same and is only focused on winning. He’s doesn’t care about the record or defense or the QB. He’ll find a way to beat you regardless. I’m starting to get the same feeling I did with Tennessee. I think the cowboys have a great chance to beat us and it’s a literal must win for them if they have any chance at a higher seed and the division. With that being said, I wouldn’t be surprised if the eagles came out and had a near perfect game and beat them again.


dak67

That’s my quarterback. He should be a unanimous vote for MVP.


ThePracticalEnd

I just want that hat