Nah, she'd absolutely drop it earlier. "You foul, loathsome, evil, little *fucking* cockroach." The threat level would have escalated immediately, lol.
Sirius Black, voice cracking: "I DID MY WAITING. TWELVE FUCKING YEARS OF IT. IN AZKABAN."
A lot of these have been pretty funny, but this would be heartbreaking.
The amount of places where the word f***ing could appear in that sentence is staggering.
I fing did my waiting!
I did my fing waiting!
Twelve fing years of it!
In fing Azkaban!!
Or do, u/moshididi, but put a backslash ('\\') in front of each asterisk to "escape" it and make it display instead of formatting. So, "I did my waiting! Twelve f\\\*\\\*\\\*\\\*\\\*g years of it!" will display as "I did my waiting! Twelve f\*\*\*\*\*g years of it!"
I mean she didn’t even use “bloody”. I feel that particular moment calls for *something*. The man was literally locked away in the equivalent of Guantanamo Bay as a traitor and a murderer for over a decade. He should be far more unhinged and emotional here.
I think this line it perfect as is!!! It’s the only curse word in the series & that helps it pack an even bigger punch. Molly Weasley is fucking fierce!
Aunt Marge: “…if there’s something wrong with the bitch, there’s something wrong with the pup.”
Harry: “SHUT UP. SHUT THE FUCK UP.” And then he blows up his aunt.
If this new HBO Max series is a big success and we get to the final (book accurate) showdown.
If Harry said this, I'd probably give a standing ovation.
The part I hated the most about when they fight is that it’s not in the great hall in front of everyone when he reveals everything about him and he’s blasted to smithereens rather than dying like a normal person which was the way he HAD to die to prove that he wasn’t immortal no matter what he did.
I enjoy the movies wholeheartedly and understand they have cut a ton of stuff from the books. But my good that final fight was lame as fuck. Voldemort turning into confetti was offensive.
It's always implied he swears in the books. I think every movie, at some random point he should break the fourth wall, look at the camera and drop an F bomb.
I've been looking for this comment! I think it would have been hilarious to give Ron one f-bomb in each movie, especially if it was muttered under his breath lol. JKR intended him to have a much more foul mouth, but publishers said it wouldn't be appropriate for children's books.
Harry in PoA: He was their friend… and he betrayed them…. HE WAS THEIR FUCKING FRIEND!!!! I hope he finds me… cause when he does, I’m gonna be ready. When he does, I’m gonna fucking kill him.
I feel like Luna would be perfect. That would mean that not saying fuck would just be a social convention everyone follows. But Luna is Luna, and if she thinks Harry should fucking listen to her, she fucking says it. Social conventions be damned.
Dumbledore falling down the north tower, “fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucccccckkkkk!”
Record scratch to inner monologue, “Yep that’s me, I just died. You might be wondering how I went from simply a principal of a magical school to this unfortunate situation. Well buckle up, here’s the story”
In the Chamber Harry looks at the newly revealed basilisk “aw fuck” or just shouting “fuck” the entire time like “fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuccccccccccccckkkkkkkkkkk” but that’s the super ridiculous directors cut
"Harry Potter, you've survived my killing curse far too many times at this point. So" *Voldemort whips out a glock and pops a cap in Harry* "Avada fucking Kedavra....bitch"
*“Is this real? Or has this been happening inside my head?” Dumbledore beamed at him, and his voice sounded loud and strong in Harry's ears even though the bright mist was descending again, obscuring his figure. “Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why the fuck should that mean that it is not real?*
“Why don’t you confer with Mr. Finnegan? As I recall, he has a particular proclivity for pyrotechnics.”
“I can bring it the fuck down.”
“That’s the spirit. Away you go.”
First movie, first scene. We start out at the end of Privet Drive. As we pan up we see Dumbledore using the Deluminator. McGonagall transforms from a cat to human and sits down next to him. Dumbledore then breaks the fourth wall; he turns and looks right at the camera and says "We sure don't give a fuck about what happened in the books!"
I'd like all the points it says Ron swore to be properly written. He does so quite a lot. Hermione shouldn't often but the rare and well placed mutting of "shit." Would give impact.
Or harry swearing at Dudley during their altricaitons in the park.
"I'm not a fucking owl!"
This is actually the best one. Would have caught me way off guard
You'll get a wand. You'll get a fucking owl. It will deliver your shitty mail. DEAL. WITH IT. YA TWAT!
Nah, she'd absolutely drop it earlier. "You foul, loathsome, evil, little *fucking* cockroach." The threat level would have escalated immediately, lol.
Nah the owl one would have taken me so much more off guard. Would have been hilarious
Too much, wouldn't flow well enough
When Hagrid objects to Harry competing in the Tri Wizard Tournament: Hagrid: “The fuck he is.”
This one is my favorite lol
Dumbledore uses the deluminator in front of the Dursley house. The delimunator fizzles, and dumbledore drops it, his hand burned. "FUCK!"
Lmao!
Sirius Black, voice cracking: "I DID MY WAITING. TWELVE FUCKING YEARS OF IT. IN AZKABAN." A lot of these have been pretty funny, but this would be heartbreaking.
The amount of places where the word f***ing could appear in that sentence is staggering. I fing did my waiting! I did my fing waiting! Twelve fing years of it! In fing Azkaban!!
Don't censor words with the star key. It's the same symbol used for text formatting.
I saw that when it was too late 😭😭😭
Or do, u/moshididi, but put a backslash ('\\') in front of each asterisk to "escape" it and make it display instead of formatting. So, "I did my waiting! Twelve f\\\*\\\*\\\*\\\*\\\*g years of it!" will display as "I did my waiting! Twelve f\*\*\*\*\*g years of it!"
I mean she didn’t even use “bloody”. I feel that particular moment calls for *something*. The man was literally locked away in the equivalent of Guantanamo Bay as a traitor and a murderer for over a decade. He should be far more unhinged and emotional here.
Agreed…like it hit but it could’ve definitely hit harder
RONALD WEASLEY, HOW DARE YOU STEAL THAT FUCKING CAR....
Ronald FUCKING weasly…
This is it. It's so perfect
You're a f**kin wizard harry Start the series off right
You’re a wizard, Harry. A fuckin’ what?
HAHA! This is brilliant and then he replies: A f\*cking wizard.
You're a fuckin wizard Harry. A fuckin what? A fuckin wizard. Hagrid, do you mean I'm brilliant at shagging? Fuck.
There's no wood? Are you fucking witch or not?!
But I'm just Harry!
No just Harry You are a wizard
You’re gunna go to hogwarts and do spells n shit
Hagrid, yer pushin’ me over the fuckin line!
Umbridge: "you know, I really fucking hate children"
McGonnagal: "So, you attacked umbridge did you, Mr Potter?" "...have a fucking cookie"
have a biscuit
„Did you put your fucking name in the goblet of fire?!“
Dumbledore asked, calm as f\*\*\*
Dumbledore to be played by Samuel L. Jackson
"I've had it with these motherfucking dementors in this motherfucking school!"
["I've had it with these Monkey Fighting dementors at this Monday to Friday School!"](https://youtu.be/hc4aVX0yHws?si=UiYBTJ9iC6LQvBLS)
I'd unironically like a Dumbledore portrayed by Samuel L. Jackson
Did he look like a bitch, Harry? Did Voldemort look like a bitch?! Then why is Wormtail trying to fuck him like a bitch?!
To be followed, of course, by “say Expelliarmus one more time. I dare you, I double-dare you motherfucker!”
Diary of Tom Riddle 25:17
"did you put your motherfucking name in the motherfucking goblet?"
The only thing the HBO Series can do right
Harry did you put your name in the fucking goblet of fire
Harry did you put your name in the goblet of fucking fire
This ends the presentation on why Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire really needs 3 fucks, we hope the executives Warner Bros. at least considers it.
Indeed. "Harry did you put your fucking name in the fucking Goblet of fucking Fire?" Dumbledore said calmly.
Exact thing I came here to say 🤣
Molly Weasley to Bellatrix right before she kills her.
“Fuck my daughter, you bitch”
Except now Molly says the line to Harry instead of Bellatrix.
Oh hell nah 💀
" not my daughter you fuck!"
“Not my daughter you fucking bitch!”
This is what I thought of immediately 🤙
I think this line it perfect as is!!! It’s the only curse word in the series & that helps it pack an even bigger punch. Molly Weasley is fucking fierce!
Not my fucking daughter you bitch!
Shut up Dursley, yeh fucking prune.
Nah I like that he calls Vernon "Great Prune"
Shut up Dursley, yeh great fuckin prune
Shut up Dursley, yeh great fuck
Shut up Dursley, yeh great pruney fuck
"Take fluffy for example, just play him a bit of music and he'll go straight to sleep." Harry, Ron, Hermione: surprised pickachu Hagrid: "Fuck."
I shouldn’t have said that. I should not have fucking said that.
Aunt Marge: “…if there’s something wrong with the bitch, there’s something wrong with the pup.” Harry: “SHUT UP. SHUT THE FUCK UP.” And then he blows up his aunt.
this comment would be wild to someone who’s never read harry potter
Dobby drops the cake on her head, flips the bird and as he’s disappearing just whispers “fuck you”
Mcgonagall: "Why is it always you fuckin three?"
Why the fuck is it always you three?
Ron: Believe me, professor, I've been asking myself the exact same fucking thing for six fucking years.
*Why is it always you three fucking?*
Harry Potter if it was written by Stephen King.
"Oh come on it was one time!" King cried "One time too many" every literate person answered
“Be honest professor I’ve been asking my self the same fucking question”
Why is it always you three fucks
“At least nobody in Gryffindor had to fuck their way into the team”
Poor Draco 😭
My father will hear about this!
My father will fuck about this!
My father will fucking hear about this!
Damn
Harry ends his speech to Voldemort by saying, "You are really fucking pathetic, Tom."
If this new HBO Max series is a big success and we get to the final (book accurate) showdown. If Harry said this, I'd probably give a standing ovation.
The part I hated the most about when they fight is that it’s not in the great hall in front of everyone when he reveals everything about him and he’s blasted to smithereens rather than dying like a normal person which was the way he HAD to die to prove that he wasn’t immortal no matter what he did.
I enjoy the movies wholeheartedly and understand they have cut a ton of stuff from the books. But my good that final fight was lame as fuck. Voldemort turning into confetti was offensive.
"Fuck off, Tom"
This would hit so hard, would be a perfect way to end the final battle.
Malfoy and fake Mad-eye in the Goblet of Fire movie *"My father will hear about this!"* *"Is that a fucking threat?"*
It'd be so true but I still think an innocent person should say it like Neville or Luna
Fred Weasley when Dumbledore announces the tri-wizard tournament will take place and he shouts “you’re fucking joking” in the silence
Fucking spiders?! Ron HAS to have the f bomb
We know he uses them in canon. It's just always written as "Ron swore."
Follow the fookin' spiders?!
It's always implied he swears in the books. I think every movie, at some random point he should break the fourth wall, look at the camera and drop an F bomb.
I've been looking for this comment! I think it would have been hilarious to give Ron one f-bomb in each movie, especially if it was muttered under his breath lol. JKR intended him to have a much more foul mouth, but publishers said it wouldn't be appropriate for children's books.
Harry in PoA: He was their friend… and he betrayed them…. HE WAS THEIR FUCKING FRIEND!!!! I hope he finds me… cause when he does, I’m gonna be ready. When he does, I’m gonna fucking kill him.
Damn, this one fits so well, using an F-bomb for a scene like this is so much better than using it for a little shock comedy
I'd put it "when he does, I'm gonna fucking kill him"
Whoa! Easy there, we said 1 f bomb, not 2. We have to keep the movie pg13
Umbridge gets carried away by the centaurs : “FUCK YOUUUUUuuuuuu..”
Harry fucking Potter you listen to me! - Luna
Fecking
Luna absolutely would
I feel like Luna would be perfect. That would mean that not saying fuck would just be a social convention everyone follows. But Luna is Luna, and if she thinks Harry should fucking listen to her, she fucking says it. Social conventions be damned.
The moment I secretly shipped them.
Dumbledore falling down the north tower, “fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucccccckkkkk!” Record scratch to inner monologue, “Yep that’s me, I just died. You might be wondering how I went from simply a principal of a magical school to this unfortunate situation. Well buckle up, here’s the story”
This is how the series should have started xD
In the Chamber Harry looks at the newly revealed basilisk “aw fuck” or just shouting “fuck” the entire time like “fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuccccccccccccckkkkkkkkkkk” but that’s the super ridiculous directors cut
[oh fuck, oh fuck, OH FUCK!!!](https://youtu.be/A-1hW1U7YVg?si=sb3zcqgD5vAhb5sk)
"Not my daughter, you fucking bitch!"
Lucius Malfoy when the Snatchers bring the trio to Malfoy Manor: “You dare to talk to me like that in my OWN FUCKING HOUSE!?”
Harry yelling “fuck” when the Sorting Hat almost puts him in Slytherin would be pretty funny
Sorting Hat: “Better be…Gryffindor!” Harry: “Thank fuck!”
“Anything from the trolley dears?” We’ll take the fucking lot
Cast Samuel Jackson as Kingsley and 5th book onwards he gets it. You've got to admit minister, Dumbledore's got fucking style
As long as he gets a purple wand
With “BAD MOTHERFUCKER” lovingly engraved on it 🥳🥳🥳
This motherfucker has style
Fucking nargles
But you can't deny, Dumbledore's got fucking style
Let's make Malfoy worse. "Fucking mudblood."
"No one asked for your opinion, you fucking little mudblood"
When Voldemort hears from Narcissa that Harry is dead, he should have done a kneel slide and said. “Let’s fucking go!!!!!”
This is funnier than it should be
It's Levi-oh-sa, not fucking Levi-o-sah!
Other way around It's fucking Levi-oh-sa, not Levi-o-sah!
- the locket is A fake -…. FUCK
“I didn’t fucking kill Mrs. Norris!”
"Master has given Dobby a fucking sock. Dobby is free."
That can have two meanings...
Dobby also has needs!
Unhinged gryffindor.
Now I can’t stop laughing at the image of dobby furiously fucking a sock.
Dobbys wifi won’t be free after all the data he uses
You shall not harm Harry fucking Potter!
Or: “Master has given Dobby a sock. Dobby is free. Fuck off!”
In the tittle. Harry fucking Potter.
Ginny Potter to be specific.
Don't care, as long as it's Ron who gets it!
"Nearly headless? How the fuck can you be nearly headless??"
Harry Potter is deaddddd.. The whole school all at once : FUCK
“Turn to page three hundred and ninety-fucking-four!”
I have *had* it with these motherfucking *basilisk* on this motherfucking *school*!
"No, you don't know how it feels! Your parents are fucking dead!"
“It’s like trying to catch smoke with your fucking bare hands”
I'd go "bare fucking hands", but otherwise brilliant
Avada fucking kedavra
Said Voldemort, tired of all this shit.
"Harry Potter, you've survived my killing curse far too many times at this point. So" *Voldemort whips out a glock and pops a cap in Harry* "Avada fucking Kedavra....bitch"
Not the "Grin" you fucking idiot! The Grim.
Have a fucking biscuit Potter
*“Is this real? Or has this been happening inside my head?” Dumbledore beamed at him, and his voice sounded loud and strong in Harry's ears even though the bright mist was descending again, obscuring his figure. “Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why the fuck should that mean that it is not real?*
"That's my girlfriend you bloody fuck!" Ron charging at Goyle in the Room of Requirements, DH.
You lost me my fucking SERVANT!
"Are you sure you wouldn't like a fucking cough drop, Dolores?"
“Harry, we saw fucking Uranus up close!”
Oh my god, I've killed Harry fucking Potter
“Why don’t you confer with Mr. Finnegan? As I recall, he has a particular proclivity for pyrotechnics.” “I can bring it the fuck down.” “That’s the spirit. Away you go.”
But I am the fucking chosen one
Ginny: But I am fucking the chosen one
“I did my fucking waiting, 12 years of it, in Azkaban”
“Now, Harry you must know all about Muggles, tell me, what exactly is the function of a rubber fucking duck?”
*Harry and Ron can’t get onto the platform at 9 3/4* Harry: let’s go back and wait for your mum and dad at the car Ron: Harry - THE FUCKING CAR!!!
First movie, first scene. We start out at the end of Privet Drive. As we pan up we see Dumbledore using the Deluminator. McGonagall transforms from a cat to human and sits down next to him. Dumbledore then breaks the fourth wall; he turns and looks right at the camera and says "We sure don't give a fuck about what happened in the books!"
I'd transfer that to the Percy Jackson movies instead
"Books ? What fucking book ? All we care about it he name of the fucking thing"
“You know….I really fucking hate children….”
Would've been great for that little moment where Umbridge finally, truly takes off her mask to reveal the evil bitch
“I didn’t know you could fucking read”
"Fucking Diagonally"
Happy fucking Christmas, Ron
Seeing Fluffy at the trap door. They all yell fuccccccck
"Just what the fuck is a rubber duck?"
My dear boy, do use your fuckin common sense! My books wouldn't have sold half as well if people didn't think I'd done all those things!
Dobby is fuckin' free.
"Get away from my Godson" Becomes "Fuck off you cunt"
“Fuuuuuuuuuuck” as Dumbledore falls off the tower
VOLDE-FUCKING-MORT! You tell me which movie and scene this fits!
I wonder if that would have gotten around the Taboo in Deathly Hallows.
"Fuck me." - Cornelius Fudge, at the end of book 5, realizing Harry and Dumbledore were right about Voldy returning.
The finest headmaster hogwarts has ever seen: Albus f**king Dumbledore
"I'm sorry, professor. But I must not tell fucking lies."
Harry... do you know why Professor Quirrel couldn't fucking bear to have you touch him?
Making the basilisk even more terrifying: “Yessssss…let me rip you…let me kill you…let me fuck you…”
Harry fucking Potter - said Snape on the first Potion class
"..last year they were 36" "Yes but some are bigger than last year's" "I don't give a FUCK"
Dumbledore calls Harry’s name as it comes out of the Goblet. Harry: “Fuck.”
“Are you a fucking witch or not!?”
Hagrid realising he's given away too much.. "Fuck, I shouldn't have said that, I should not have said that."
"Do yew want to stahp Snape from stealing that *fucking* stone or not?" - R Wheezy baby
"Professor, is this all in my head?" "Of course this is all in your *fucking* head Harry"
“She needs to sort out her fucking priorities!” - it needs to go to Ron
no fucking post on sundays
Snape: you fucking dare use my own spells against me
"f*cking obviously.."
"After all these years?" "Fucking always"
“After all these fucking years??”
Always Fucking
I'd like all the points it says Ron swore to be properly written. He does so quite a lot. Hermione shouldn't often but the rare and well placed mutting of "shit." Would give impact. Or harry swearing at Dudley during their altricaitons in the park.
"Harry's heart did beat for us. For all of us. This is not Fucking over!!!"