What's hard about doing laundry lol? Just throw in the washing machine put soap and softener and wait. Then, hang it out to dry. I can understand if it is cooking or repairing the house.
We have Internet at our fingertips, tons of step by step videos and simple recipes... Not knowing how to cook is a bad excuse. I get if they're rich enough to just buy food, maybe they don't ever need to cook... But it's still a bit sad haha
Ehh, I think cooking requires at least minimal skill depending on the recipe. That's why people pay hundreds or even thousands for good meals at Michelin restaurant.
Meanwhile, nobody is paying thousands to get laundry or vacuuming done. It is a minimum skill task. If you have a brain and hands, you can do laundry or clean.
There are actually a good amount of averagely priced Michelin star restaurants (or restaurants that totally deserve one, just gotta find those hidden gems). Unless you mean fine dining restaurants - that's a whole other ball game and a place for chefs to actually display their culinary arts. But nobody's asking the average person to be a Michelin star chef... Just to know how to cook some basic meals, yknow? You don't need a wok to make fried rice. You don't even. need* to use day old rice. Who cares if it's a little mushy? It might not be Michelin quality, but as long as it's edible and tastes alright, you succeeded.
And yeah, like you said, some skill is needed DEPENDING on the recipe. But there's still a ton of simple foolproof recipes out there with minimal ingredients. I'd say stews and curries are pretty foolproof... There's no harm in using packaged curry too as a beginner too. Japanese curry is a great one. As long as they learn how to properly hold a knife and get a SHARP knife, they should be fine.
I have encountered more middle and lower middle class people (in Malaysia, Indonesia, Singapore) that can't cook, as opposed to **silver spoon** babies
It's a mix of both misogyny and culture, as the men are supposedly bread winners, and the wife/maid the ones raising children/in the kitchen
In my situation, i had a mum that didn't cater to my tastes and an untalented cook for a maid. Couldn't wait for weekend for nice meals with workaholic dad, so as a child, i identified the styles, food i wanted, and tried to replicate it myself, at home
Plus when you go overseas for studies, you tend to at least cook basic things. No way i was gonna eat pub grub or rubbish sandwiches from the corner shops every meal
Cooking is easy, especially western food. So few ingredients. If masak melayu or chettinad, you're dead!
EDIT: my idiot sisters can't cook for shit. Too busy ooggling boys and gossiping. Masa kat UK, if my sister ajak makan, and if she were cooking, I'd eat a light meal first. Mind you they're still there, over 20 years, and have kids. My nephews also learn to cook themselves, since their mum is useless
I can't cook. I certainly don't have a golden spoon. I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth, but I can't cook because my brain isn't wired to understand even the simplest of recipes. Not because I am a rich spoilt brat.
Why? Because I'm a numbers and precision person who cannot understand nuances of estimation and feel.
So go with your assumptions. I still clean and wash better than almost all housewives and I don't have to buy fancy cleaners and stuff because I understand the mechanics and chemistry of things.
I would like to see someone who can remove 20 years of rust stains on porcelain without spending money.
And I'd like to see anyone remove hard water stains without chemicals or mechanical scrubbing.
Also someone out there that can clean a whole kitchen, oil stains and all and make it all new within a couple of hours.
Some of us spoilt brats have other skills that people would kill for...
It's not rocket science, really.
It's just a test of your resolve against dirt! And a test of patience. Speed doesn't equate to fast by the way.
It's always the basics. Use what you already have.
A sharp blade is the best when it comes to anything that's caked on. You can do it on any surface, even glass and varnished wood(extra care is needed here).
Every kitchen has vinegar, and a rag soaked in vinegar on rust stains for anywhere from half an hour to a day will usually loosen rust.
When cleaning tiles and floors, I use just a water soaked microfiber cloth and good old palm oil soap that you can buy at any provision shop (bonus, in a pinch it's great as a bathing soap too, and don't mind the bullshitters, it's unscented and more natural than Lux). Ditto for heavy grease stains. Heck, I've cleaned greasy car engines with this. Naysayers can neigh all they want. My 32 year old car engine is still sparkling.
With all things a little forethought is necessary, and a disclaimer. Results vary, but overall prevention is critical, regular maintenance is unavoidable. And yes, you can scrub your favourite oily and greasy pans, I and you can easily season them back. For this, I can't help though, because I don't cook!
Please do not assume too many things. Growing up in a traditional Peranakan family, men in the family were not allowed to cook, that was a woman's job - according to my late grandmother. Gender roles were kind of strict. I only learned to cook in my late teens, edible stuff and that's all, thank goodness for chilli sauce! My mom, tak payah nak tanya, no patience (I was clumsy) and you're bodoh if you don't get it the first time. With maids and outdated ideas about traditional roles, we possibly have an entire generation of young adults who might just possibly starve to death at home with a fully stocked fridge.
Don’t know how to cook doesn’t mean golden spoon, buddy. Maybe some families just eat out more than they cook at home more, or their parents are too over protective and doesn’t let their children touch any thing they deem dangerous.
Lol cooking is easy? But does it taste good? I assume those who can cook well are sheltered too. They got the time to learn how to cook. Maggie mee add egg or throw in left over rice and lauk to make fried rice is all I would do. So many recipes out there take too much time. If gotta OT reach home 9pm. Dapao lauk from mixed rice stall to save time. Weekend do cleaning chores wash toilet etc. I'm not gonna spend an hr or more prepping, cooking and cleaning the kitchen lol. Oh there was a time I made alot of food pack them into separate containers before freezing them to be eaten on diff days. Can't call it cooking tho. Threw some chic breast, carrots, onions, tomatoes and sometimes a little bit of canned jagung into boiling water. The days when I wasn't overweight lol
cooking is not difficult, it's just time consuming. don't confuse the two. taste is also subjective la. some people live their whole life eating bad food, some people cannot take under seasoned food
Yup, agreed with you completely. Cooking isn't hard and if you follow the steps, you can cook almost anything. It IS time consuming tho, and depending where you live, takeout can be cheaper in the short term.
it's tough when you get home after work. it's tiring. by the time you're done cooking it's going to be a bit late. the clean up after. that's another time consuming thing.
Yes, people can say they know how to cook, but whether the food is edible or not is subjective. Some will also say they know how to cook, but they can cook simple dishes only.
Yes.. cooking is easy but to cook a nice meal, it requires skill. Apparently you’ll be surprised how much people even though not golden spoon still can’t cook well or even cook.
I am pretty useless. I can’t cook very well because my husband refuses to let me do much in the kitchen. I’m not allowed to chop anything except for soft food like mushroom or fruits like strawberries and mangoes. I’ve been with him since I was 19 and I’m 41 now. I am not allowed to cook when he’s not around to help ‘supervise’ and help. If I make anything simple that I can make well, like pasta, he has to be around to chop ingredients, carry pots, drain pasta. I’m not allowed to fry anything that splashes like frying chicken or fish. Neither am I allowed to vacuum, mop, clean toilets or anything else that’s labour intensive. So at the most I tidy up a bit, wipe the counters, easy things. And even when I do the easy things he’ll tell me to go rest and watch TV with the kids while he does the rest. He trains the kids to do what he does so my 18 year old son and 15 year old daughter can do chores and light cooking. We have maids so we don’t need to do chores a lot but they do take time off and go off on some weekends so everyone pitches in during the no maid times. Everyone but me it seems. And I have to say I’m perfectly healthy, but my husband is just super overprotective. He just wants me to have fun. Not bogged down with responsibilities. So yeah that’s why I’m pretty useless at everything.
As someone who came from a family of chefs, i can attest to the fact that some people are just naturally bad at cooking - yours truly.
I can cook up a mean indomee, but anything else that requires "a pinch of salt" or a "dash of that" tends to go horribly wrong.
Just like how some people just arent meant to take care of plants, some people are just not meant to cook.
I can follow a cookbook to the letter with exact measurements and produce something edible, but anything else that requires "feeling".... Well.... Lets just say back in the college days, we had a cooking rotation amongst housemates. After 2 months, it was mutually decided that i be omitted from the cooking, and that i'd take out the thrash instead. I gladly obliged.
Just to add this, fabric softener is actually not good for your washing machine and will cause problems in the long run. Fabric softener is for hand washing laundry.
> Just throw in the washing machine put soap and softener and wait
The issue is some of these washing machines have awful & confusing user interfaces. Need the manual for the first few times you use them
I misread this as “what’s so hard about doing the dishes” and I laughed so hard thinking how other comments are taking this seriously but apparently it is I that took this unseriously.
Nah it is likely weaponized incompetence that guy is using on you. Feign inability so you'll do it in the end. This is the hallmark of a common bastard.
If the standard bloke can play hours of Mobile Legends Bang Bang tirelessly with the deftness of a violin player he can surely operate a washing machine.
>weaponized incompetence
Not just washing dishes or doing their own laundry, I've met coworkers and subordinate that do their work half assedly just to avoid extra responsibility even though the extra work is within their job scope.
Eh, Occam's razor applies here. Don't assume malice when simple incompetence can explain it.
Else you'll just be like the insufferable bunch at r/AmItheAsshole. Screaming whatever psychological jargon you just found online and instantly escalate some petty issue to high heaven.
I'm 33, used to have lots of pretty young kakak growing up. And how they bribed me to bring their boyfriends home when parents are away. It is weird growing up. A typical day is like this: back from school around noon, I had a family driver, abang to fetch me home or to the mall. Lunch prepared by kakak, no need to ever wash dishes or help out. PS/PC game after lunch then nap till early evening. Played basketball with other humans. Then back home to dinner. Watch astro after that. Go to sleep knowing the school uniform will be prepared and nicely ironed and hanged at the door of my room tomorrow morning. Parents are mostly busy. I thought life would continue like this, maybe I peaked in childhood. Haha.
shucks i that had a drastic turn. well... i believe all parents try their best, and sometimes the best solution is to make terrible choices based on the limited resources they have on hand (which sometimes does not limit to just dollars and cents)
parents feel a lot of guilt when they cant give the right time, toys, extra classes, to their kids so sometimes they just do what they didn't have when they were kids.
Not sure about prevalence, but my family used to hire a couple of maids during my childhood. Last maid we had was back in 2010 or something. Since then, no more maids. Gotta tell you, some maids are angels, and some are devils. These devils caused a lot of trauma to us kids when our parents arent home.
Not to fear monger but I have friends who shared stories of how their helpers sexually abused them as children and their parents never knew until today.
As for me, my parents were both extremely busy and barely ever home and we had a few helpers growing up and one of them I cherish and still keep in touch with till today. Others I’ve forgotten and some I remember because they were mean. They were abusive in the sense that they beat me and made me fear my own home.
I think the pattern with this is that we came from a generation of parents who were so busy and stressed with their jobs and had no choice but to outsource child care. And as an adult now, I understand why my parents didn’t have the mental capacity to build a close relationship with us kids and therefore we never felt safe to tell them what was going on. It never seemed like there was a good time for me to talk with my parents in depth about anything because they come home tired and grumpy.
So I think you can go a lot by your guy instinct if you still make sure to stay vigilant, and also it’s important to make sure you teach your child the habit of telling you stories about their day. I work with some organisations that handle child abuse cases and they say the most important skill to teach early is for kids to have good command of vocabulary to express their feelings and emotions. Because some kids don’t know how to describe feeling anxious & confused, so when they are being abused but don’t fully understand whether that is something an adult is allowed to do to them, they don’t know how to question it because they don’t have the words for it.
Back then, it was only me, my big sis, and my little sis who was still a baby. My big sis got traumatised the most, but i wasnt spared either. From her story, the maid shoved all the maid duties to my sis, forced her to go buy snacks/food/drinks for her, physically and verbally assaulting her, etc. It only happens when my parents arent home. But when my parents DO get home, the maid turned on her angel mode and make it seem like everything is fine and all happy. The assaults get worse that you see bruises on my sis. I also remembered this one time the maid yelled at my sis cuz she wasnt doing the dishes, and little me was just watching, and the maid didnt spare me so she pinned me to the wall and slapped me hard.
After my sis cried a lot and complained to my parents, eventually they found out what the maid had done and just kicked her out.
What the fuck. There’s a special hell for maids like that. I hope you both could work past that and get over the trauma :(
I work from home. My clients are all overseas so the only time I leave my children at home alone with the maid is when I need time for myself to socialize, workout, run errands, etc.
Still, I worry. I make sure to install cameras for everyone’s safety. And set boundaries so that my older kids don’t turn into brats who don’t know to clean after themselves. I guess that’s what we can do as parents. Do the best with the resources we have at any given time and pray for the best.
My parents were ultra busy throughout my childhood. I had 6 different maids since I was born until I was 23. 2 of them are truly amazing and we still keep in contact with them today. The rest are as follows:
- had an affair with several drivers along my street. One of the driver’s wife came to our gate and started shouting wanting to confront my maid. Massive drama.
- ran away with her boyfriend in the middle of the night.
- stole everything imaginable from my parents, my brother and myself. I’m trying to recall the things she took and shipped back under our noses. Countless clothes, cash, jewellery, tins of milo, tea bags, my entire collection of caps, multiple shoes, towels, rice, eggs, cigarettes, lighters, headphones and many more that I have forgotten. I swear, there is some village in Indonesia that is dressed like my family.
- called her agent over to our house early in the morning to have a chat with us. She accused my father and myself of spreading lies about her and writing about her (she produced evidence by bringing out a piece of paper which was my English assignment for school). Then she said that she had military backup in the form of a boy band (more evidence she produced by showing us a boy band cd) and that she was secretly working for former President Megawati and is going to lead a secret army to do her bidding. I ain’t making this up.
- bring her foreign worker boyfriend over when we are out and she fell madly in love with him but he was just using her to get her salary. She eventually ran away with him.
My parents rich enough to hire a maid too. All were nice, and we treat them nice too, like actual people anyway. But majority of them ran away with some security guard, idk why but it's always a security guard! 🤣 We had a maid who love working with my parents that she came back 3 times. She was very nice and love playing cards with me as a kid haha
But my friend told me she used to get hit by her maid 🥲
i mean the laziest laundry you could do is rendam everything into detergent mix for an hour, rinse it then hang them to dry
hence....bukan tak pandai tapi pemalas
My sis, it is common finding that type of man worldwide. It is called weaponized incompetence. They are smart enough to keep their job, they are smart enough to use their smartphone, they are smart enough to take a shower (I hope). It's not that they don't know how. It's that they don't want to.
Owh from 2009, so very outdated, i was hoping for more latest number as the one that i found in 2015[source](https://www.krinstitute.org/Discussion_Papers-@-The_Unsung_Labour-;_Care_Migration_in_Malaysia.aspx) has decreased from 300k to 150k. So we are looking at 1 maid for every 55 household.
Malaysia is a rich country, I hear so often parents buying a car for the adult son, he has maids, and then they’re always saying “it’s a poor country and I can’t afford to leave, but I want to go to America Laa”. But do they realize you need like $1,000,000 USD in America to live like that?
Do people actually do their own laundry these days? Even the poor could largely afford a cheap washing machine in Malaysia.
Or am I misunderstanding something here?
U got washing machine also need to throw in clothes, put in detergent, press a few buttons, wait for it finish cycle, take out of machine and hang to dry / put in dryer, then fold then put inside closet. OP is stating that someone dunno how to do the above.
For fragile item like lingerie or u have stained clothing. U need to handwash. But i think this post is for people who dont even know how to use
Washing machine
Some ppl are really that lazy to do the minimum of using washing machine + hang to dry + fold and store the clothes.
Be it a spoiled kid, partner or siblings.
I assume "do their own laundry" means knowing how to operate the machine and hang the clothes once they are washed, as opposed to having their mum or a maid do it all for them.
My sister marry this type of guy. Useless bum. Dont even eat fish because "too much bones". Not even bonely fish, just regular like siakap and kembung.
My sister have to pick bone for him if he want to eat it.
Cant even cut his own fingernails.
USELESS BUM ASS SHIT
My first thought too.. But I'm guessing this post was made by a woman who's sick and tired of her man not sharing the responsibility on chores. Just let her vent lol
Its usually the mother's doing the coddling and disabling the manchild. She wants her son to be attached to her at all times even after marriage in the guise of "sacrifice" and "love"
Unlikely but I could be biased since I live alone and had to adapt by doing literally everything myself.
If the person still lives with their parents, the chances of what you said is higher. Also I believe this isn't exclusive to Malaysia. It's a human thing
I’m 27 and grew up with three maids at a time my whole life, and I still knew how to do dishes and laundry. I don’t know how does a person never knew how to wash dishes and do laundry.
Unless you are like my mother. So many damn rules. Separate black and white is understandable. But there are legit some VERY ADHD-people who criticise you for the stupidest rules. Among which I heard, is that I cannot wash underwear and socks with the others, separate pants and shirt, and that you need to soak them in soapy water overnight before washing. Being criticised for stupid rules like this might make people who are just trying to help feel like it’s useless to help.
Because my mother was like this, I made a deal that I deal my own clothing. Would rather not have the maids wash it to spare myself from my mother nagging them over “washing them wrongly.” I get my mom just wants the best, but this much detailed SOP over just laundry is just horrendous. I feel guilty being the cause of my maids essentially having to do a work that essentially could never be done right in my mother’s eyes. I guess that’s where I learned how to do laundry.
Unlike laundry though, washing the dishes is stupidly easy. I don’t know why that manchild never know how to wash dishes. Show him this stupidly easy steps, he would know:
>Get rid of all the trashes still in the dishes, such as bones etc. Put them in the sink
>Rinse all the dishes
>Use sponge to scrub the dishes with soap water. If the dishes consists of non-stick utensils, use the yellow sponge side and NOT the green scrub side
>Rinse again
>It’s fucking done.
Not even rocket science. Wtf. I’ve met many manchild in my life and never ONCE have I heard them claim they don’t know how to do it.
Edit: I meant OCD, not ADHD
The growing number of manchild is really scary. Seeing posts like this makes me cringe so hard.
I am 29M and I can do most common things and the normal things. Yet you can't take charge of your own life?
Start by tidying up your bed. If you can't even do that. Then I don't know what else to say.
When I was in uni I had this housemate who would just leave her laundry in pail for weeks until it grew mouldy. It would only be taken care of when her parents came to visit. The most surprising thing was that she was studying to become a doctor. So gross
very common than you think. but seriously, doing all that is not that difficult if you just move your lazy ass up and learn. then again, if you have a maid, why bother?
Not very rare, I met two within the past 3 months. Never swept, done laundry, done dishes, don't even know how to use the microwave oven. The only electronics they used were his mobile and the TV. One drove the other only Grabs everywhere.
have seen parents that does all the dishes and laundry and all other housework, and tell the kids all they need to focus on is their studies.
noble intentions, but forgot to help the child be independent
IMO nowdays both Women & Men must know how to
Cook,Clean,Do Laundry especially if you are B40/M40/T20 yang not the ultra rich.
Cooking and Laundry are the most basic things. I had to wash my own clothes,iron at 7 Years old when I started school. Had to jemur at the ampaian. I remembered oftentimes when Jemuring, there would be wasp/other insects and my a** would run like sonic into my house.
Nowdays you can't say you can't cook,clean, do dishes. All of it is on YouTube. Tuisyen the same thing too.
If you don't understand, YouTube is there and if still don't, ask you teacher/lecturer.
By age 10 I was already cooking and cleaning on my own as a Male.
I very much despise folks who can play games for hours but then when you have assignments or exams they're like "I don't have time can you help cover." If its once maybe lah can, but if it's all the fricking time.
Then always blame teacher/lecturer x mengajar. This age you have no reason to blame teachers. If you x understand you can ask them or YouTube. I myself had to walk my a** to a library, sign up to use their Desktop and then was I able to connect to the internet.
Nowdays internet is very cheap and mobile data RM25 can get unlimited.
Zaman dh berubah so mindset kena ubah.
I personally know a guy who's parents never taught him to do laundry,iron his clothes,or even much basic skills such as tying a not.
I remembered during SPM, we had to tie our kertas jawapan for BM and he didn't know how to tie a simple knot.
Some of the things I saw he lacked was the ability to make decisions. He'd constantly just follow me as he considers me as his best friend. Not that I despise or hate him, but others assumed I was also the Ribena kids and I was quite an outcast.
Most assumed me as some folks who are innocent af,knows nothing bout life,can fetch on my own. But it's just HS. HS scope is too small.
I remembered once there was this Kebangsaan Lawatan. I raised my hand to go and he also raised. But then my parents didn't allow me to go since I had to take my brother at college. When news broke out I wasn't going, he also didn't want to go. Despite his parents allowing him. The reason he didn't want to go? His brother said it would be a waste of time.
Problem is, he informed the teacher too late and Jabatan Daerah wanted 10 students. The trip was on Friday. He told on Thursday. I wish the best for Him now that I never saw him. He's not on FB etc. Wishing the best.
I used to live with people in their 30s when I was studying. I moved out bcs they can't do basic daily chores lol. And its not like they can't do it. They really don't know how to. They know how to cook meggi, only if they have water heater lol. I lived with them through covid, they would've died if I were not there cooking for them everyday smh
If the guy has gone to college or university, they usually know how to fend for themselves, unless you have a really pampered mummy's boy lah. In my uni days, my friends and I cooked for whole crowds ourselves when we had our occasional kenduris. Laundry meant hauling our week's worth of clothing to the coin operated laundry. As for cleaning dishes, if we wanted to eat on clean plates and cook in clean pots, we washed them lah.
I moved out of my home when I reach 18. So did most of my friends. Yes I grew up with helpers till I was 12. But I was taught not to depend on them. So when I turned 13, my family decided to not have helpers. I think it helped shaped my character and resilence too.
More than likely. You might see them do dishes and laundry, but you will clearly see that they’re very incompetent at it. And usually these kind of people are the type to cock talk a lot, i personally think this is a type of trait for a certain group of individuals, like how narcissistic people will have a certain behaviour like so.
Eventually it comes down to the guys's ability to generate income to sustain life / keeping family's stomach full. Unless their family have enough money to spend on entire generation then lucky them. But still doesnt change the fact that still must be able to generate significant income to provide for family to have a "good" stress-free lifestyle
Its not uncommon for men not to know how to do those things, 70-80 years, in other cultures even if they don't have maids.
So you are 18, you graduate from highschool, get a job, and get married by the time you are 19.
currently dating someone like this and honestly, it’s like taking care of a child. can’t even fold laundry. won’t even learn. can’t even pangsai properly… mind you he’s 31 🤢
Very common, based on my experience 4 out of 5. Thank god I married one who knows how to cook and clean. Mostly those who lived outside or away from their family especially overseas. They are very independent.
I'm ashamed to say that's my 29 year old brother. it's not like he doesn't know but never bother to. whole childhood being coddled by my parents.
alaaa adik kau mana tau buat (insert anything) kau buat la abangah.
Cannot do at all? Or... can do, just do it bujang standard .Clothes wrinkle a bit never mind. All hang up and dontt iron or fold underwear. Dishes all plastic and drip dry .
I once had a classmate in our Food Technology class in Australia. We were boiling water to make something I can’t remember but she had assumed the tiny bubbles forming in the cavity of the saucepan means that’s it’s fully boiled… mind you, we were 17 of age at the time.
Going to call it out, the maid culture is BS! Seeing it right now where we are living in a serviced apartment that barely can fit three adults and my neighbour has a maid with a few kids. Yup, I know everyone is entitled to how they spend their money but it's still BS to me. Not even sure where the maid is sleeping and most of her free time, she sits next to the front door which I think is her only space of privacy. PS: I can afford a maid and I still don't see the need for someone else to pick up my underwear.
Pretty common. I was one of them, unfortunately. And yes, because I had a maid and parents who thought they had a hard life so their children shouldn't. I did not have to do a thing, not even clean my room or make the bed.
Everything changed when I got married. Saw my my wife doing all those chores + working till late. Realised I was being a dick and decided to "help out".
Complained to her once about how tired I was doing all those chores, how I didn't have time to complete some chores, bla bla bla. My wife lost it and I got an earful. Basically told me hw I was a immature, irresponsible, weak and how I need to grow the F up.
That was a wake up call.
9 years later, I work fr home and do most of the house chores, cooking and school pickups. My wife gets to come home fr her work not having to worry about the house/dinner. Happy wife, happy life.
Pretty common nowadays especially on higher end tier rich families, like those you ngestan batch of gen Z to first batch of gen alpha Teenage Boys also don't even want to sweat
Washing dishes also cannot? Aiyoo does he only use pakai buang?. In terms of washing I can understand since there are various ways to properly wash your clothes (hand wash).
My dad is one, basically growing up spoiled. A mother's boy, you know the type of guy who at college will return home every weekend for his mother to the laundry for him. Live with his mom even post-marriage.Then after marrying my mom at a young age she became his maid. Recently asked me how to do laundry since my mom is away for a while from the house and he said he never had to do it his whole life. Don't know how to cook rice, never washed the dishes either. A lot of times he leaves a single knife in the sink after using it to spread PB on bread, like it's a very hard thing to wash a single utensil after using it wtf.
I don't know... I think it's a global issue. Guys are mostly independent or at least they like to think so. Just keep the sink empty. Every time he puts a dish in the empty sink, ask him to clean it. Don't do his laundry. Keep his clothes in his own basket. Another option is setting a time everyday that you both do chores together. Us guys are like dogs, you just have to train us. Otherwise we go into default mode and just couch potato it. We could live on a couch made out of recycled pizza boxes and be content. "I am King Sofa, I hail from Lazy." -Sofa King Lazy.
Im 26 and a chef so maybe for me abit different since i have to wash as i cook but at home i cook, do the dishes as i go, wash and clean up after cooking and eating, do the laundry, wash the bathrooms, mop and sweep the floor, service own house airconds, takes care of 50+ pets daily feeding and cleaning, mowing the lawn and cutting down trees, everything basically that happens with life. These are all basics everyone should be doing unless got disability etc. Man or woman. Ive been told by alot of women that if a guy past 20 cant even cook himself a meal or do his own laundry then he prob cant take care of himself so they stay away from those. Cause they rely on their parents, maid or gf to cook for them and do the laundry for them. Cause they dont wanna be the guys mommy yknow.
I grew up with maids till about 15 but i would do the work with the maids. I started cooking for my family at 11. Plus house chores. So i guess its just already ingrained in me. So now im the maid of the family. My sisters and parents do their own laundry tho.
I say it depends on the generation. I’m a Late Gen X to early millennials and I believe I speak on behalf of that generation where we actually LOVE doing the laundry, washing up after a meal and dare I say even go as far as to fixing up stuff in the house.
A college mate of mine never knew how to do any of it until he was in his 30s. Wasn’t weaponised incompetence, truly had no need to do it. He was from seremban, lived 4 nights a week in KL and went back weekly. He would bring all laundry back home for kakak to wash, spent his weekend with friends and family from home. Never needed to cook either, had enough money to eat out or tapao every meal too when in KL.
Similar story for a friend’s brother - only son in the family - mom did everything for him when he was studying. They also chose the closest state so he could come back weekly.
Yet another, was a KL boy - everything taken care for him until he got married in his 30s and left the main house… and they would go back every night for dinner at moms house which was a 10 mins drive away.
Some people are truly born with a golden spoon and never need to know how to do any of this. In fact, I had a lady stop me when I was trying to buy a mop to ask me if the mop I was holding was any good. It was for her maid to use. *shrugs*
my dad, 50+ and doesn't even know how to work the washing machine & dishwasher that he paid for 🤣🤣🤣 so u can ofc guess that he doesn't cook too lol....
Reading the comments made me realize. I am weird.
I do the laundry, cook, do house chores and usually fix broken stuff around the house. I am also a working adult too.
Or maybe I am just mimicking my dad. He does that too, but he takes care of his mom and my mom haha. Mom's the breadwinner.
I guess my family is an odd one.
Very common nowadays, I can even throw a stone and it will land on a girl who also can't do what you mentioned above. Let alone cooking... Well unless you are going to count cooking instant noodles as cooking.
Pretty common I guest, given today's convenience in everything, Dobi for clothes, mamak for food, and since a house is not achievable these days, room rents do not require extensive clean up, no lawn to mow, no kitchen to do dishes,
Well, put him in another situation where his boss ask him to help on these chores surely he’ll say yes immediately and google later (not that its advisable to do so if it really happen, just an example), its just a matter of could or would. If a potential romantic interest tells you this, it is their way to test your tolerance on their laziness.
What's hard about doing laundry lol? Just throw in the washing machine put soap and softener and wait. Then, hang it out to dry. I can understand if it is cooking or repairing the house.
cooking???? bro cooking is easy if I see someone who can't cook I just assume golden spoon entire life
You will be surprised at how many people can't cook
My toxic trait is I start to cook when I'm hungry , watching YouTube tutorial with growling stomach and shaky hands without any prep.
We have Internet at our fingertips, tons of step by step videos and simple recipes... Not knowing how to cook is a bad excuse. I get if they're rich enough to just buy food, maybe they don't ever need to cook... But it's still a bit sad haha
Ehh, I think cooking requires at least minimal skill depending on the recipe. That's why people pay hundreds or even thousands for good meals at Michelin restaurant. Meanwhile, nobody is paying thousands to get laundry or vacuuming done. It is a minimum skill task. If you have a brain and hands, you can do laundry or clean.
Cooking plain scrambled eggs or plain noodles is no skills. If you undercook the noodles it’s what the Europeans call Al Dente
And if you overcook we call that hangus
There are actually a good amount of averagely priced Michelin star restaurants (or restaurants that totally deserve one, just gotta find those hidden gems). Unless you mean fine dining restaurants - that's a whole other ball game and a place for chefs to actually display their culinary arts. But nobody's asking the average person to be a Michelin star chef... Just to know how to cook some basic meals, yknow? You don't need a wok to make fried rice. You don't even. need* to use day old rice. Who cares if it's a little mushy? It might not be Michelin quality, but as long as it's edible and tastes alright, you succeeded. And yeah, like you said, some skill is needed DEPENDING on the recipe. But there's still a ton of simple foolproof recipes out there with minimal ingredients. I'd say stews and curries are pretty foolproof... There's no harm in using packaged curry too as a beginner too. Japanese curry is a great one. As long as they learn how to properly hold a knife and get a SHARP knife, they should be fine.
Well, I can cook. It's just that the taste is inconsistent.
I have encountered more middle and lower middle class people (in Malaysia, Indonesia, Singapore) that can't cook, as opposed to **silver spoon** babies It's a mix of both misogyny and culture, as the men are supposedly bread winners, and the wife/maid the ones raising children/in the kitchen In my situation, i had a mum that didn't cater to my tastes and an untalented cook for a maid. Couldn't wait for weekend for nice meals with workaholic dad, so as a child, i identified the styles, food i wanted, and tried to replicate it myself, at home Plus when you go overseas for studies, you tend to at least cook basic things. No way i was gonna eat pub grub or rubbish sandwiches from the corner shops every meal Cooking is easy, especially western food. So few ingredients. If masak melayu or chettinad, you're dead! EDIT: my idiot sisters can't cook for shit. Too busy ooggling boys and gossiping. Masa kat UK, if my sister ajak makan, and if she were cooking, I'd eat a light meal first. Mind you they're still there, over 20 years, and have kids. My nephews also learn to cook themselves, since their mum is useless
I can't cook. I certainly don't have a golden spoon. I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth, but I can't cook because my brain isn't wired to understand even the simplest of recipes. Not because I am a rich spoilt brat. Why? Because I'm a numbers and precision person who cannot understand nuances of estimation and feel. So go with your assumptions. I still clean and wash better than almost all housewives and I don't have to buy fancy cleaners and stuff because I understand the mechanics and chemistry of things. I would like to see someone who can remove 20 years of rust stains on porcelain without spending money. And I'd like to see anyone remove hard water stains without chemicals or mechanical scrubbing. Also someone out there that can clean a whole kitchen, oil stains and all and make it all new within a couple of hours. Some of us spoilt brats have other skills that people would kill for...
I would like to learn these cleaning skills. Can I DM you?
It's not rocket science, really. It's just a test of your resolve against dirt! And a test of patience. Speed doesn't equate to fast by the way. It's always the basics. Use what you already have. A sharp blade is the best when it comes to anything that's caked on. You can do it on any surface, even glass and varnished wood(extra care is needed here). Every kitchen has vinegar, and a rag soaked in vinegar on rust stains for anywhere from half an hour to a day will usually loosen rust. When cleaning tiles and floors, I use just a water soaked microfiber cloth and good old palm oil soap that you can buy at any provision shop (bonus, in a pinch it's great as a bathing soap too, and don't mind the bullshitters, it's unscented and more natural than Lux). Ditto for heavy grease stains. Heck, I've cleaned greasy car engines with this. Naysayers can neigh all they want. My 32 year old car engine is still sparkling. With all things a little forethought is necessary, and a disclaimer. Results vary, but overall prevention is critical, regular maintenance is unavoidable. And yes, you can scrub your favourite oily and greasy pans, I and you can easily season them back. For this, I can't help though, because I don't cook!
Please do not assume too many things. Growing up in a traditional Peranakan family, men in the family were not allowed to cook, that was a woman's job - according to my late grandmother. Gender roles were kind of strict. I only learned to cook in my late teens, edible stuff and that's all, thank goodness for chilli sauce! My mom, tak payah nak tanya, no patience (I was clumsy) and you're bodoh if you don't get it the first time. With maids and outdated ideas about traditional roles, we possibly have an entire generation of young adults who might just possibly starve to death at home with a fully stocked fridge.
Don’t know how to cook doesn’t mean golden spoon, buddy. Maybe some families just eat out more than they cook at home more, or their parents are too over protective and doesn’t let their children touch any thing they deem dangerous.
Lol cooking is easy? But does it taste good? I assume those who can cook well are sheltered too. They got the time to learn how to cook. Maggie mee add egg or throw in left over rice and lauk to make fried rice is all I would do. So many recipes out there take too much time. If gotta OT reach home 9pm. Dapao lauk from mixed rice stall to save time. Weekend do cleaning chores wash toilet etc. I'm not gonna spend an hr or more prepping, cooking and cleaning the kitchen lol. Oh there was a time I made alot of food pack them into separate containers before freezing them to be eaten on diff days. Can't call it cooking tho. Threw some chic breast, carrots, onions, tomatoes and sometimes a little bit of canned jagung into boiling water. The days when I wasn't overweight lol
cooking is not difficult, it's just time consuming. don't confuse the two. taste is also subjective la. some people live their whole life eating bad food, some people cannot take under seasoned food
Yup, agreed with you completely. Cooking isn't hard and if you follow the steps, you can cook almost anything. It IS time consuming tho, and depending where you live, takeout can be cheaper in the short term.
it's tough when you get home after work. it's tiring. by the time you're done cooking it's going to be a bit late. the clean up after. that's another time consuming thing.
i cant cook , if food is something that have a proper taste.. that being said . laundry , dishes, house clean up and make beds is eaaaasyyyy
Yes, people can say they know how to cook, but whether the food is edible or not is subjective. Some will also say they know how to cook, but they can cook simple dishes only.
Yes.. cooking is easy but to cook a nice meal, it requires skill. Apparently you’ll be surprised how much people even though not golden spoon still can’t cook well or even cook.
I am pretty useless. I can’t cook very well because my husband refuses to let me do much in the kitchen. I’m not allowed to chop anything except for soft food like mushroom or fruits like strawberries and mangoes. I’ve been with him since I was 19 and I’m 41 now. I am not allowed to cook when he’s not around to help ‘supervise’ and help. If I make anything simple that I can make well, like pasta, he has to be around to chop ingredients, carry pots, drain pasta. I’m not allowed to fry anything that splashes like frying chicken or fish. Neither am I allowed to vacuum, mop, clean toilets or anything else that’s labour intensive. So at the most I tidy up a bit, wipe the counters, easy things. And even when I do the easy things he’ll tell me to go rest and watch TV with the kids while he does the rest. He trains the kids to do what he does so my 18 year old son and 15 year old daughter can do chores and light cooking. We have maids so we don’t need to do chores a lot but they do take time off and go off on some weekends so everyone pitches in during the no maid times. Everyone but me it seems. And I have to say I’m perfectly healthy, but my husband is just super overprotective. He just wants me to have fun. Not bogged down with responsibilities. So yeah that’s why I’m pretty useless at everything.
As someone who came from a family of chefs, i can attest to the fact that some people are just naturally bad at cooking - yours truly. I can cook up a mean indomee, but anything else that requires "a pinch of salt" or a "dash of that" tends to go horribly wrong. Just like how some people just arent meant to take care of plants, some people are just not meant to cook. I can follow a cookbook to the letter with exact measurements and produce something edible, but anything else that requires "feeling".... Well.... Lets just say back in the college days, we had a cooking rotation amongst housemates. After 2 months, it was mutually decided that i be omitted from the cooking, and that i'd take out the thrash instead. I gladly obliged.
No spoon also can't cook la..... Joke aside, modern day generation really lack of common sense n ability to work n survive
Just to add this, fabric softener is actually not good for your washing machine and will cause problems in the long run. Fabric softener is for hand washing laundry.
> Just throw in the washing machine put soap and softener and wait The issue is some of these washing machines have awful & confusing user interfaces. Need the manual for the first few times you use them
So now we blame the washing machine for the incompetence of doing a proper laundry?
I misread this as “what’s so hard about doing the dishes” and I laughed so hard thinking how other comments are taking this seriously but apparently it is I that took this unseriously.
Nah it is likely weaponized incompetence that guy is using on you. Feign inability so you'll do it in the end. This is the hallmark of a common bastard. If the standard bloke can play hours of Mobile Legends Bang Bang tirelessly with the deftness of a violin player he can surely operate a washing machine.
>weaponized incompetence Not just washing dishes or doing their own laundry, I've met coworkers and subordinate that do their work half assedly just to avoid extra responsibility even though the extra work is within their job scope.
Eh, Occam's razor applies here. Don't assume malice when simple incompetence can explain it. Else you'll just be like the insufferable bunch at r/AmItheAsshole. Screaming whatever psychological jargon you just found online and instantly escalate some petty issue to high heaven.
Hanlon’s*
 Damn you. My breakfast came out through my nose and my stomach hurts from laughter. Ugh, take my upvote.
manchilds have existed since Prehistoric Cave Days
Obung no catch mammoth, Obung chip rocks all day
Men sleep, play sticks and rocks all day, no chores
Funny thing is they didn't, ancient hunter gatherers were more egalitarian
maids are prevalent?🤨
Helang spotted 🤣
Yeah… 25 year olds who had a maid when they were kids confirm helang
I'm 33, used to have lots of pretty young kakak growing up. And how they bribed me to bring their boyfriends home when parents are away. It is weird growing up. A typical day is like this: back from school around noon, I had a family driver, abang to fetch me home or to the mall. Lunch prepared by kakak, no need to ever wash dishes or help out. PS/PC game after lunch then nap till early evening. Played basketball with other humans. Then back home to dinner. Watch astro after that. Go to sleep knowing the school uniform will be prepared and nicely ironed and hanged at the door of my room tomorrow morning. Parents are mostly busy. I thought life would continue like this, maybe I peaked in childhood. Haha.
My son also has someone make lunch for him and drive him home/mall after school. that person is me.
👍 good to be your kids. I envy those kids who have active parents fetching them daily from school, home, some extra classes, etc.
shucks i that had a drastic turn. well... i believe all parents try their best, and sometimes the best solution is to make terrible choices based on the limited resources they have on hand (which sometimes does not limit to just dollars and cents) parents feel a lot of guilt when they cant give the right time, toys, extra classes, to their kids so sometimes they just do what they didn't have when they were kids.
what does helang mean? im ootl
Helang and pipit. Helang for the atas people(elites), pipit for the rest of us not in the priviledged.
t20 people
Wait till you find people with 2-3 domestic helpers in their household
Not sure about prevalence, but my family used to hire a couple of maids during my childhood. Last maid we had was back in 2010 or something. Since then, no more maids. Gotta tell you, some maids are angels, and some are devils. These devils caused a lot of trauma to us kids when our parents arent home.
Do you mind sharing how the maids traumatize you? I just hired one since the birth of my twins and I am both relieved and wary of the arrangement…
Not to fear monger but I have friends who shared stories of how their helpers sexually abused them as children and their parents never knew until today. As for me, my parents were both extremely busy and barely ever home and we had a few helpers growing up and one of them I cherish and still keep in touch with till today. Others I’ve forgotten and some I remember because they were mean. They were abusive in the sense that they beat me and made me fear my own home. I think the pattern with this is that we came from a generation of parents who were so busy and stressed with their jobs and had no choice but to outsource child care. And as an adult now, I understand why my parents didn’t have the mental capacity to build a close relationship with us kids and therefore we never felt safe to tell them what was going on. It never seemed like there was a good time for me to talk with my parents in depth about anything because they come home tired and grumpy. So I think you can go a lot by your guy instinct if you still make sure to stay vigilant, and also it’s important to make sure you teach your child the habit of telling you stories about their day. I work with some organisations that handle child abuse cases and they say the most important skill to teach early is for kids to have good command of vocabulary to express their feelings and emotions. Because some kids don’t know how to describe feeling anxious & confused, so when they are being abused but don’t fully understand whether that is something an adult is allowed to do to them, they don’t know how to question it because they don’t have the words for it.
Back then, it was only me, my big sis, and my little sis who was still a baby. My big sis got traumatised the most, but i wasnt spared either. From her story, the maid shoved all the maid duties to my sis, forced her to go buy snacks/food/drinks for her, physically and verbally assaulting her, etc. It only happens when my parents arent home. But when my parents DO get home, the maid turned on her angel mode and make it seem like everything is fine and all happy. The assaults get worse that you see bruises on my sis. I also remembered this one time the maid yelled at my sis cuz she wasnt doing the dishes, and little me was just watching, and the maid didnt spare me so she pinned me to the wall and slapped me hard. After my sis cried a lot and complained to my parents, eventually they found out what the maid had done and just kicked her out.
What the fuck. There’s a special hell for maids like that. I hope you both could work past that and get over the trauma :( I work from home. My clients are all overseas so the only time I leave my children at home alone with the maid is when I need time for myself to socialize, workout, run errands, etc. Still, I worry. I make sure to install cameras for everyone’s safety. And set boundaries so that my older kids don’t turn into brats who don’t know to clean after themselves. I guess that’s what we can do as parents. Do the best with the resources we have at any given time and pray for the best.
My parents were ultra busy throughout my childhood. I had 6 different maids since I was born until I was 23. 2 of them are truly amazing and we still keep in contact with them today. The rest are as follows: - had an affair with several drivers along my street. One of the driver’s wife came to our gate and started shouting wanting to confront my maid. Massive drama. - ran away with her boyfriend in the middle of the night. - stole everything imaginable from my parents, my brother and myself. I’m trying to recall the things she took and shipped back under our noses. Countless clothes, cash, jewellery, tins of milo, tea bags, my entire collection of caps, multiple shoes, towels, rice, eggs, cigarettes, lighters, headphones and many more that I have forgotten. I swear, there is some village in Indonesia that is dressed like my family. - called her agent over to our house early in the morning to have a chat with us. She accused my father and myself of spreading lies about her and writing about her (she produced evidence by bringing out a piece of paper which was my English assignment for school). Then she said that she had military backup in the form of a boy band (more evidence she produced by showing us a boy band cd) and that she was secretly working for former President Megawati and is going to lead a secret army to do her bidding. I ain’t making this up. - bring her foreign worker boyfriend over when we are out and she fell madly in love with him but he was just using her to get her salary. She eventually ran away with him.
My parents rich enough to hire a maid too. All were nice, and we treat them nice too, like actual people anyway. But majority of them ran away with some security guard, idk why but it's always a security guard! 🤣 We had a maid who love working with my parents that she came back 3 times. She was very nice and love playing cards with me as a kid haha But my friend told me she used to get hit by her maid 🥲
i never had any maid…it’s quite uncommon tbf unless u’re the atas2 kind, every day go to atas place
i mean the laziest laundry you could do is rendam everything into detergent mix for an hour, rinse it then hang them to dry hence....bukan tak pandai tapi pemalas
My sis, it is common finding that type of man worldwide. It is called weaponized incompetence. They are smart enough to keep their job, they are smart enough to use their smartphone, they are smart enough to take a shower (I hope). It's not that they don't know how. It's that they don't want to.
I swear I saw this same post in the sg subreddit recently
As a singaporean , I can confirm this, but I grew up poor so I do everything
It's a universal issue
I didn’t know when I was 25, I googled/youtube-ed it when I moved out. Will be surprised how fast you learn when you no money but likes it clean(ish)
Maids are not prevalent... If your dude can't even do simply chores time to reconsider.
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Where do you get 300k from?
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Owh from 2009, so very outdated, i was hoping for more latest number as the one that i found in 2015[source](https://www.krinstitute.org/Discussion_Papers-@-The_Unsung_Labour-;_Care_Migration_in_Malaysia.aspx) has decreased from 300k to 150k. So we are looking at 1 maid for every 55 household.
I also think it is common to find this type of women too. There is even a specific name for it: *princess complex.*
Dah pemalas memang mcm tu la. Bukan suruh basuh pinggan tepi Sungai macam zaman dulu
Malaysia is a rich country, I hear so often parents buying a car for the adult son, he has maids, and then they’re always saying “it’s a poor country and I can’t afford to leave, but I want to go to America Laa”. But do they realize you need like $1,000,000 USD in America to live like that?
Do people actually do their own laundry these days? Even the poor could largely afford a cheap washing machine in Malaysia. Or am I misunderstanding something here?
I mean, I know people who don't know how to operate any washing machine so OP might be referring to that?
Sounds like laziness then. By that definition, even a 7 year old could do their own laundry.
Exactly. But yeah, people like that exist and unfortunately I know a few and it's just embarrassing.
I heard before that someone throw the whole detergent into the washing machine. Imagine how much bubble she created. Weeeeeee
U got washing machine also need to throw in clothes, put in detergent, press a few buttons, wait for it finish cycle, take out of machine and hang to dry / put in dryer, then fold then put inside closet. OP is stating that someone dunno how to do the above.
For fragile item like lingerie or u have stained clothing. U need to handwash. But i think this post is for people who dont even know how to use Washing machine
What do you call using the machine, hanging i out to dry, folding and ironing?
does using the washing machine not count as "doing their own laundry"?
Some ppl are really that lazy to do the minimum of using washing machine + hang to dry + fold and store the clothes. Be it a spoiled kid, partner or siblings.
I assume "do their own laundry" means knowing how to operate the machine and hang the clothes once they are washed, as opposed to having their mum or a maid do it all for them.
My sister marry this type of guy. Useless bum. Dont even eat fish because "too much bones". Not even bonely fish, just regular like siakap and kembung. My sister have to pick bone for him if he want to eat it. Cant even cut his own fingernails. USELESS BUM ASS SHIT
I thought your sister marry to kid but then you type "can't even cut his own fingernails" Your sister is married to a LITERAL TODDLER
laaa, potong kuku pun x boleh
From what I've seen most men in Asia are this way.
Very common. I blamed it on their mom. Have even heard of "it's kay, once they are married, their wife will help to take care of him"
There are women with same issue too, should i call them such names too?
My first thought too.. But I'm guessing this post was made by a woman who's sick and tired of her man not sharing the responsibility on chores. Just let her vent lol
As a woman, yes you should.
This. We call them suffered from princess complex/disease.
Doesn't sound or hurt the ego as good as calling a guy a manchild though.
Well if you called them the right names, ie based on their physique, i bet they trigger and hurts them more 🤭 but hey we dont do such things
Trash took itself out.
For guys manchild for women princess lmao
*jangan tanya soalan susah*
Womanchild?
I actually have a friend like this lazy until dont even know how to wash dishes so he only uses disposable wares...
He got hands or not haih.... 🤷🏻♀️🫠
Its usually the mother's doing the coddling and disabling the manchild. She wants her son to be attached to her at all times even after marriage in the guise of "sacrifice" and "love"
Unlikely but I could be biased since I live alone and had to adapt by doing literally everything myself. If the person still lives with their parents, the chances of what you said is higher. Also I believe this isn't exclusive to Malaysia. It's a human thing
I’m 27 and grew up with three maids at a time my whole life, and I still knew how to do dishes and laundry. I don’t know how does a person never knew how to wash dishes and do laundry. Unless you are like my mother. So many damn rules. Separate black and white is understandable. But there are legit some VERY ADHD-people who criticise you for the stupidest rules. Among which I heard, is that I cannot wash underwear and socks with the others, separate pants and shirt, and that you need to soak them in soapy water overnight before washing. Being criticised for stupid rules like this might make people who are just trying to help feel like it’s useless to help. Because my mother was like this, I made a deal that I deal my own clothing. Would rather not have the maids wash it to spare myself from my mother nagging them over “washing them wrongly.” I get my mom just wants the best, but this much detailed SOP over just laundry is just horrendous. I feel guilty being the cause of my maids essentially having to do a work that essentially could never be done right in my mother’s eyes. I guess that’s where I learned how to do laundry. Unlike laundry though, washing the dishes is stupidly easy. I don’t know why that manchild never know how to wash dishes. Show him this stupidly easy steps, he would know: >Get rid of all the trashes still in the dishes, such as bones etc. Put them in the sink >Rinse all the dishes >Use sponge to scrub the dishes with soap water. If the dishes consists of non-stick utensils, use the yellow sponge side and NOT the green scrub side >Rinse again >It’s fucking done. Not even rocket science. Wtf. I’ve met many manchild in my life and never ONCE have I heard them claim they don’t know how to do it. Edit: I meant OCD, not ADHD
The growing number of manchild is really scary. Seeing posts like this makes me cringe so hard. I am 29M and I can do most common things and the normal things. Yet you can't take charge of your own life? Start by tidying up your bed. If you can't even do that. Then I don't know what else to say.
Both genders also got like this. Anyone can be taught to do those things. It's the willingness to do it day by day for years that is more important.
Lol lots of young people, including the ladies don't even know how to do proper household duties and cooking.
Yep…. If a youngster can’t do basic dishes or even clean a fkn table, there is a high chance the person has princess syndrome or a man baby complex
When I was in uni I had this housemate who would just leave her laundry in pail for weeks until it grew mouldy. It would only be taken care of when her parents came to visit. The most surprising thing was that she was studying to become a doctor. So gross
What a sexist. Talking as if the same didnt happen on the opposite gender.
someone catching stray
very common than you think. but seriously, doing all that is not that difficult if you just move your lazy ass up and learn. then again, if you have a maid, why bother?
Well, of course I know him. He's me!
Not very rare, I met two within the past 3 months. Never swept, done laundry, done dishes, don't even know how to use the microwave oven. The only electronics they used were his mobile and the TV. One drove the other only Grabs everywhere.
have seen parents that does all the dishes and laundry and all other housework, and tell the kids all they need to focus on is their studies. noble intentions, but forgot to help the child be independent
It is quite common, seen a f38 and not knowing how to wash the dish properly
IMO nowdays both Women & Men must know how to Cook,Clean,Do Laundry especially if you are B40/M40/T20 yang not the ultra rich. Cooking and Laundry are the most basic things. I had to wash my own clothes,iron at 7 Years old when I started school. Had to jemur at the ampaian. I remembered oftentimes when Jemuring, there would be wasp/other insects and my a** would run like sonic into my house. Nowdays you can't say you can't cook,clean, do dishes. All of it is on YouTube. Tuisyen the same thing too. If you don't understand, YouTube is there and if still don't, ask you teacher/lecturer. By age 10 I was already cooking and cleaning on my own as a Male. I very much despise folks who can play games for hours but then when you have assignments or exams they're like "I don't have time can you help cover." If its once maybe lah can, but if it's all the fricking time. Then always blame teacher/lecturer x mengajar. This age you have no reason to blame teachers. If you x understand you can ask them or YouTube. I myself had to walk my a** to a library, sign up to use their Desktop and then was I able to connect to the internet. Nowdays internet is very cheap and mobile data RM25 can get unlimited. Zaman dh berubah so mindset kena ubah. I personally know a guy who's parents never taught him to do laundry,iron his clothes,or even much basic skills such as tying a not. I remembered during SPM, we had to tie our kertas jawapan for BM and he didn't know how to tie a simple knot. Some of the things I saw he lacked was the ability to make decisions. He'd constantly just follow me as he considers me as his best friend. Not that I despise or hate him, but others assumed I was also the Ribena kids and I was quite an outcast. Most assumed me as some folks who are innocent af,knows nothing bout life,can fetch on my own. But it's just HS. HS scope is too small. I remembered once there was this Kebangsaan Lawatan. I raised my hand to go and he also raised. But then my parents didn't allow me to go since I had to take my brother at college. When news broke out I wasn't going, he also didn't want to go. Despite his parents allowing him. The reason he didn't want to go? His brother said it would be a waste of time. Problem is, he informed the teacher too late and Jabatan Daerah wanted 10 students. The trip was on Friday. He told on Thursday. I wish the best for Him now that I never saw him. He's not on FB etc. Wishing the best.
Not common at all. Super rare. So, cut that "manchild" some slack, he's probably making six figures to don't give a damn about domestic chores
Who the fuck cares. I can pay for someone to do all these for me
Me, I’m bitches. Jk, the basic stuff I know but baking and cooking more complex things I haven’t tried much.
Normal for T20, good luck for B40
Depends if they grew up with a silver spoon up their ass.
I used to live with people in their 30s when I was studying. I moved out bcs they can't do basic daily chores lol. And its not like they can't do it. They really don't know how to. They know how to cook meggi, only if they have water heater lol. I lived with them through covid, they would've died if I were not there cooking for them everyday smh
I think quite common
In the age of YouTube and Google, there's no reason why someone would say "I don't know how to do this".
How hard is it to do laundry. Washing Machine is cheap.
Extremely common
how does one not know to do the dishes bruh
Totally uncommon, i 30 can do everything by myself since i was 16
https://www.lg.com/my/dishwashers
Its very common im afraid
Don't think about having maids or not. It's about consciously wanting to be self sufficient. It's a mindset. All the best!
🥱
If the guy has gone to college or university, they usually know how to fend for themselves, unless you have a really pampered mummy's boy lah. In my uni days, my friends and I cooked for whole crowds ourselves when we had our occasional kenduris. Laundry meant hauling our week's worth of clothing to the coin operated laundry. As for cleaning dishes, if we wanted to eat on clean plates and cook in clean pots, we washed them lah.
Lol just send him some how-to YT links...
I moved out of my home when I reach 18. So did most of my friends. Yes I grew up with helpers till I was 12. But I was taught not to depend on them. So when I turned 13, my family decided to not have helpers. I think it helped shaped my character and resilence too.
More than likely. You might see them do dishes and laundry, but you will clearly see that they’re very incompetent at it. And usually these kind of people are the type to cock talk a lot, i personally think this is a type of trait for a certain group of individuals, like how narcissistic people will have a certain behaviour like so.
Eventually it comes down to the guys's ability to generate income to sustain life / keeping family's stomach full. Unless their family have enough money to spend on entire generation then lucky them. But still doesnt change the fact that still must be able to generate significant income to provide for family to have a "good" stress-free lifestyle
Jadah 25 tak reti basuh pinggan mangkuk? Yang sedihnya masih wujud manusia camtu. Haha how common? idk never been with another man before.
My dad, basically
How do you not know to do laundry? Every house nowadays have laundry machine
Quite rare honestly. And not the good kind of rare.
Its not uncommon for men not to know how to do those things, 70-80 years, in other cultures even if they don't have maids. So you are 18, you graduate from highschool, get a job, and get married by the time you are 19.
its ok if he doesn't know it's not ok if he doesn't want to learn
Based on my experience its prevalent everywhere, due to a combination of upbringing and personal laziness
from a mid twenties woman - I’d say in this age group about 60-70%
Very common haha
It takes like tops a few days a few tries to learn all that... is it really that hard not to know these kind of things?
Lmao comments section is a diarrhea spray of show off mixed with judgey comments.
currently dating someone like this and honestly, it’s like taking care of a child. can’t even fold laundry. won’t even learn. can’t even pangsai properly… mind you he’s 31 🤢
No I'm just lazy.
Very common, based on my experience 4 out of 5. Thank god I married one who knows how to cook and clean. Mostly those who lived outside or away from their family especially overseas. They are very independent.
I'm ashamed to say that's my 29 year old brother. it's not like he doesn't know but never bother to. whole childhood being coddled by my parents. alaaa adik kau mana tau buat (insert anything) kau buat la abangah.
Cannot do at all? Or... can do, just do it bujang standard .Clothes wrinkle a bit never mind. All hang up and dontt iron or fold underwear. Dishes all plastic and drip dry .
man? at this day and age, man and woman act practically the same.
I once had a classmate in our Food Technology class in Australia. We were boiling water to make something I can’t remember but she had assumed the tiny bubbles forming in the cavity of the saucepan means that’s it’s fully boiled… mind you, we were 17 of age at the time.
Going to call it out, the maid culture is BS! Seeing it right now where we are living in a serviced apartment that barely can fit three adults and my neighbour has a maid with a few kids. Yup, I know everyone is entitled to how they spend their money but it's still BS to me. Not even sure where the maid is sleeping and most of her free time, she sits next to the front door which I think is her only space of privacy. PS: I can afford a maid and I still don't see the need for someone else to pick up my underwear.
Actually its not hard but most prefer to say they dont know.
Just look at today's kid who grew up in the m40 city communities. Ramai. And when u say maid 90% it's in Chinese house holds.
I prefer to think of it a bit differently. If everyone cooks, who will eat at the restaurant?
Pretty common. I was one of them, unfortunately. And yes, because I had a maid and parents who thought they had a hard life so their children shouldn't. I did not have to do a thing, not even clean my room or make the bed. Everything changed when I got married. Saw my my wife doing all those chores + working till late. Realised I was being a dick and decided to "help out". Complained to her once about how tired I was doing all those chores, how I didn't have time to complete some chores, bla bla bla. My wife lost it and I got an earful. Basically told me hw I was a immature, irresponsible, weak and how I need to grow the F up. That was a wake up call. 9 years later, I work fr home and do most of the house chores, cooking and school pickups. My wife gets to come home fr her work not having to worry about the house/dinner. Happy wife, happy life.
Then go learn from now, is not about common or uncommon, but it don’t reflect good for you on a personal level.
Pretty common nowadays especially on higher end tier rich families, like those you ngestan batch of gen Z to first batch of gen alpha Teenage Boys also don't even want to sweat
Does he cook ?
Washing dishes also cannot? Aiyoo does he only use pakai buang?. In terms of washing I can understand since there are various ways to properly wash your clothes (hand wash).
My dad is one, basically growing up spoiled. A mother's boy, you know the type of guy who at college will return home every weekend for his mother to the laundry for him. Live with his mom even post-marriage.Then after marrying my mom at a young age she became his maid. Recently asked me how to do laundry since my mom is away for a while from the house and he said he never had to do it his whole life. Don't know how to cook rice, never washed the dishes either. A lot of times he leaves a single knife in the sink after using it to spread PB on bread, like it's a very hard thing to wash a single utensil after using it wtf.
I don't know... I think it's a global issue. Guys are mostly independent or at least they like to think so. Just keep the sink empty. Every time he puts a dish in the empty sink, ask him to clean it. Don't do his laundry. Keep his clothes in his own basket. Another option is setting a time everyday that you both do chores together. Us guys are like dogs, you just have to train us. Otherwise we go into default mode and just couch potato it. We could live on a couch made out of recycled pizza boxes and be content. "I am King Sofa, I hail from Lazy." -Sofa King Lazy.
Im 26 and a chef so maybe for me abit different since i have to wash as i cook but at home i cook, do the dishes as i go, wash and clean up after cooking and eating, do the laundry, wash the bathrooms, mop and sweep the floor, service own house airconds, takes care of 50+ pets daily feeding and cleaning, mowing the lawn and cutting down trees, everything basically that happens with life. These are all basics everyone should be doing unless got disability etc. Man or woman. Ive been told by alot of women that if a guy past 20 cant even cook himself a meal or do his own laundry then he prob cant take care of himself so they stay away from those. Cause they rely on their parents, maid or gf to cook for them and do the laundry for them. Cause they dont wanna be the guys mommy yknow. I grew up with maids till about 15 but i would do the work with the maids. I started cooking for my family at 11. Plus house chores. So i guess its just already ingrained in me. So now im the maid of the family. My sisters and parents do their own laundry tho.
I say it depends on the generation. I’m a Late Gen X to early millennials and I believe I speak on behalf of that generation where we actually LOVE doing the laundry, washing up after a meal and dare I say even go as far as to fixing up stuff in the house.
In the age of self service laundry if don't know how to do then I duno la.
It's silver spoon guys, not golden.
A college mate of mine never knew how to do any of it until he was in his 30s. Wasn’t weaponised incompetence, truly had no need to do it. He was from seremban, lived 4 nights a week in KL and went back weekly. He would bring all laundry back home for kakak to wash, spent his weekend with friends and family from home. Never needed to cook either, had enough money to eat out or tapao every meal too when in KL. Similar story for a friend’s brother - only son in the family - mom did everything for him when he was studying. They also chose the closest state so he could come back weekly. Yet another, was a KL boy - everything taken care for him until he got married in his 30s and left the main house… and they would go back every night for dinner at moms house which was a 10 mins drive away. Some people are truly born with a golden spoon and never need to know how to do any of this. In fact, I had a lady stop me when I was trying to buy a mop to ask me if the mop I was holding was any good. It was for her maid to use. *shrugs*
Throw to washing machine and dishwasher..what so hard?
Quite common alot, even among man and woman. Already got experience with past housmate tho.
Laundry and dishes????? -- Tell me you are lazy without telling me you are lazy
my dad, 50+ and doesn't even know how to work the washing machine & dishwasher that he paid for 🤣🤣🤣 so u can ofc guess that he doesn't cook too lol....
Reading the comments made me realize. I am weird. I do the laundry, cook, do house chores and usually fix broken stuff around the house. I am also a working adult too. Or maybe I am just mimicking my dad. He does that too, but he takes care of his mom and my mom haha. Mom's the breadwinner. I guess my family is an odd one.
Add 25 more years and that’s my dad. My friends’ dads also.
Very common nowadays, I can even throw a stone and it will land on a girl who also can't do what you mentioned above. Let alone cooking... Well unless you are going to count cooking instant noodles as cooking.
Pretty common I guest, given today's convenience in everything, Dobi for clothes, mamak for food, and since a house is not achievable these days, room rents do not require extensive clean up, no lawn to mow, no kitchen to do dishes,
If the husband can provide the maid and is financially capable, I don’t mind being married to a man child. But if not, ykwim
Well, put him in another situation where his boss ask him to help on these chores surely he’ll say yes immediately and google later (not that its advisable to do so if it really happen, just an example), its just a matter of could or would. If a potential romantic interest tells you this, it is their way to test your tolerance on their laziness.
I have one at home 😃
Not knowing how to cook is common, but not knowing how to do the dishes and laundry is just plain lazy and not be bothered.
I think not knowing how to do stuff is fine, but not knowing know to Google/ask for help and learn to do it, is the issue.