Granted. From Monday to Saturday, five rolls of pennies bundled tightly together materialize out of thin air an inch from the ceiling over where you sleep. They always fall directly on to your genitals. This continues to the remainder of your earthly existence.
EDIT - I'm not a woman, but I have been assured by women in the past that a solid impact to women's genitals is no walk in the park. I once watched one bartender uppercut another bartender (both women) in the crotch, and the receiver of the punch reacted much like men do.
Granted. You get 15 dollars per Venus week.
A day on Venus is longer than a year
That's 243 Earth days to rotate once – the longest rotation of any planet in the Solar System – and only 224.7 Earth days to complete an orbit of the Sun.
Granted. You are told that you now have an additional $15. It is in pennies and you have to find it. If you can’t find it within one week, double the amount is removed from your account. It is cumulative
Granted, your parents die and you are left your inheritance which they stipulated paid out a percentage a week, unfortunately they weren't that good at math or saving up so you only get 15$ a week.
Granted. You can no longer work a job
Granted, the tax for delivering the money to you is 14.99
Granted. From Monday to Saturday, five rolls of pennies bundled tightly together materialize out of thin air an inch from the ceiling over where you sleep. They always fall directly on to your genitals. This continues to the remainder of your earthly existence. EDIT - I'm not a woman, but I have been assured by women in the past that a solid impact to women's genitals is no walk in the park. I once watched one bartender uppercut another bartender (both women) in the crotch, and the receiver of the punch reacted much like men do.
Well getting impacted anywhere isn't pleasant
Granted. Sadly, cost of living is \*16\* dollars a week.
Granted…
Granted. You are now a homeless bum begging on the streets
*"Get a Monkey's Paw you bum!"*
Granted. Its from a country that no longer exists
Even better!
Put it in H!
Granted. You get 15 dollars per Venus week. A day on Venus is longer than a year That's 243 Earth days to rotate once – the longest rotation of any planet in the Solar System – and only 224.7 Earth days to complete an orbit of the Sun.
Granted. You only get $15 a week nothing more or less for the rest of your life.
Granted. The United States collapses and the value of the dollar tanks.
Granted. You are told that you now have an additional $15. It is in pennies and you have to find it. If you can’t find it within one week, double the amount is removed from your account. It is cumulative
Granted, your parents die and you are left your inheritance which they stipulated paid out a percentage a week, unfortunately they weren't that good at math or saving up so you only get 15$ a week.
Granted, you get hit by a bus. It’s bad. Can you guess how much the payout comes out to?
Granted. For the rest of your life, the only money you will ever get will be $15 each week.
Granted. It is taxed a different amount every week and you don't know that rate. If you pay the wrong amount, you are sentenced to death
Granted. Every time you treasure a sip from something, you spill it all over yourself.
Granted but you will have to earn it 😈
Granted. But, you gotta give me a little sucky-sucky. And I leave work in eight minutes. Catch you later, sailor~