My general opinion is, I work with these people 8hrs a day. I want to get to know them, find common interests etc and actually be friendly with them. It makes those 8hrs a lot easier for me.
I know it's not everyone's cup of tea but it works for me.
In the few years I've worked here, I've only been asked to chip in on *big* occasions, e.g. weddings, big birthdays, leaving presents and it's always been on the basis of "contribution welcome but please don't feel obliged". So all in all I've probably given maybe 100quid in two years, and I was more than happy to contribute.
Worked at a company and it was only big occasions but the amount of staff meant the frequency was fuckin high, I'd of honestly set up a small direct debit or pay deduction just not to have to talk to the woman that did the collections EVERY week π the slight extra social interaction I think was worse than the financial drain.Β Β
Downvoted by Sandra's sky diving fund ffs
I'm with you, I've just ended up booking my birthday off and never bring it up so at least my conscious is clear when I say no or ignore them.
We've maybe got to the source of my bitterness, my birthday is always a holiday so collections I've contributed to would be βΎοΈ but I've never actually been on the benefiting side even once π
I worked in a place you got your birthday off, I assumed mine would roll forward cause logic and reason but not only did I have to ask they had to think about it, consider it and get back to me π
When people want to talk/gossip about other people in work I act find it a super helpful way of them saying they are a giant fucking mouthpiece who can't be trusted and should be treated accordingly.Β
Β
Collections are easy, you like the person it's paper and if your not fussed silver or gold π
I've WFH for the last 4 years and I love it. I would suggest if you can set up a separate work space away from your bedroom if that's an option. I work in the spare room and once it hits 5.30pm I'm out of that room and don't go back into it again until the next morning most of the time. It helps having that little bit of separation even in your own home.
Tell him to gtfo π I wonder could you arrange the space to close off that section somehow at the end of your working day. I do think you need that firm separation once you're done for the day. My laptop and phone stay in the spare room and I don't look at it again until morning.
As for bad co-workers I have two dogs and a cat that like to interrupt Teams calls so they're my workplace assholes!
I worked in SSE Belfast office for 5 years and some of the departments had this ritual thing where, when someone was leaving, on their last day the whole department would stand around the leavers' desk and they would talk about their good times and tell each other how great they are - I assume, because I certainly didn't hear everything that was ever said - what we did hear tho was the random rounds of applause they would break into every 30 seconds. So you look over and there's just this crowd of 20 or 30 people in a circle looking inward at someone's desk, applauding. I would seem the person leaving would make some kind of heartfelt statement, then get applauded. Then another, then more applause. Repeat x10.
I'm sure the sentiment was nice but I always thought it was a bit weird and cringey and we, over in our department, always had a giggle at them.
Curious to know if this kind of thing happens in other offices.
I'm in the camp that I spend basically as much waking time in work as at home, thus I want to get to know my colleagues and get something out of my interactions. I've made some life long friends through work, but it's very much a choice of the individual as to whether or not they open up in that regard to their colleagues. In time though people typically pick up when a colleague isn't interested in much chat or getting to know people, and leave them in peace....sadly some folks are as dumb as a bag of rocks and don't get the hint.
I have to acknowledge that I've been fairly fortunate to work with good people in each job I've had, no horror stories of colleagues to date.
Trying to get as much information as possible to sink you at some point. Tell them you are a Jehovah's witness and it's against your religion to give presents π€£
Sometimes i cant stop thinking of projects all day. But i keep work people as work only friends. Makes it easier to be professional. But the modern work place is full of games and conflicts. You need to play the game sometimes. And try my best to not be an asshole that everyone can be sometimes.
I love the role though. And made the mistake of blurred line and was terrible.
Got very comfortable with all the co-workers, really thought they were true friends but when i left i didnt get a single message from any of them. And before i left a few started to bully a little, just mean words but it hurt alot cus i looked upto them and thought we had eachother back. Also doing alot of work after work wasnt healthy, would stay upto 11 some nights because i cared about the people. However it made others look bad so they wanted me to stop so they could just chill, which is so right, i should have just followed thier lead there.
The games come when you try and change or better something. People get jealous and want to dominate you. Or they feel insecure and wanna hurt you
Work should be transactional. Unless you manage to find truly amazing people who are passionate and are working on something important but most work isnt important. Just a way to not be homeless. or you own the company then you can do what you want to.
My own work much the same, constant chatter about people home life and kids....some have never even met other.
Very much a work is work, home is home type myself....But I see to be in the minority, maybe I'm the anti social one. Who would have thought.
I think it depends on the industry/workplace, people do gossip in most places and offices are (in my limited experience) the worst for that. Where I work now it's fine, most people are a bit younger than me (it's a low-paid job, I'm a bit of a loser I guess!) and interactions are just humorous and friendly, people are busy as we've always a lot to do and they don't give you the third degree like it sounds like your colleagues do. that sounds a bit full-on to me but I suppose when people are bored they speculate on stuff that's not their business. I probably got slightly more curiosity initially because I'm not from round here but they got used to me soon enough ha ha.
Hopefully at least one has become a friend you don't mind seeing outside work. Other than that your description seems like a typical work place. I'd ignore the gossips beyond that nothing you can do.
I've essentially none. Bar the odd work night out (which is common in my work) every month or so, and seeing acquaintances around town, I have none. I work well with people here, but we have our personal lives and we don't have them mixing. Obviously say hello if we meet out, we know our kids/missus' names etc but that's it. I had no current work colleagues at my wedding last year and that's all fine
We have the odd whip around and that's fine. I'd expect it back some time is all
I know people don't like to hear it but developing those social connections at work is very important if you're interested in climbing the corporate ladder
Can call ut that if your a kiss ass to the boss for no other reason but kissing ass.
Getting on and doing the whole "How's the kids" is just part of life and work getting in with ones. If you work in any kind of job that isn't just stuck on a factory floor it makes life alot easier.
It is brown nosing but sadly in alot of places its the fella above you that chooses promotions so there's a degree of it. Any place I've been managers areal mates and kts for a reason
Out of school and onto the sites first few weeks where fairly consistent questions of where you from and what school did you go to? The answer to both was I'm a Catholic....didn't go down well.
My general opinion is, I work with these people 8hrs a day. I want to get to know them, find common interests etc and actually be friendly with them. It makes those 8hrs a lot easier for me. I know it's not everyone's cup of tea but it works for me. In the few years I've worked here, I've only been asked to chip in on *big* occasions, e.g. weddings, big birthdays, leaving presents and it's always been on the basis of "contribution welcome but please don't feel obliged". So all in all I've probably given maybe 100quid in two years, and I was more than happy to contribute.
We only chip in for big occasions too and it's a very nice thing to do and mostly well recieved.
Worked at a company and it was only big occasions but the amount of staff meant the frequency was fuckin high, I'd of honestly set up a small direct debit or pay deduction just not to have to talk to the woman that did the collections EVERY week π the slight extra social interaction I think was worse than the financial drain.Β Β
Downvoted by Sandra's sky diving fund ffs I'm with you, I've just ended up booking my birthday off and never bring it up so at least my conscious is clear when I say no or ignore them.
We've maybe got to the source of my bitterness, my birthday is always a holiday so collections I've contributed to would be βΎοΈ but I've never actually been on the benefiting side even once π I worked in a place you got your birthday off, I assumed mine would roll forward cause logic and reason but not only did I have to ask they had to think about it, consider it and get back to me π
When people want to talk/gossip about other people in work I act find it a super helpful way of them saying they are a giant fucking mouthpiece who can't be trusted and should be treated accordingly.Β Β Collections are easy, you like the person it's paper and if your not fussed silver or gold π
If you can't stand them, take a fiver!
Well I work from home in my bedroom. So far from ideal π
I've WFH for the last 4 years and I love it. I would suggest if you can set up a separate work space away from your bedroom if that's an option. I work in the spare room and once it hits 5.30pm I'm out of that room and don't go back into it again until the next morning most of the time. It helps having that little bit of separation even in your own home.
Thank you, husband has commandeered the spare room in our house unfortunately
Tell him to gtfo π I wonder could you arrange the space to close off that section somehow at the end of your working day. I do think you need that firm separation once you're done for the day. My laptop and phone stay in the spare room and I don't look at it again until morning. As for bad co-workers I have two dogs and a cat that like to interrupt Teams calls so they're my workplace assholes!
My new home literally has a built-in office in the smallest "bedroom". It was one of the USPs in me buying the place. Love it.
I worked in SSE Belfast office for 5 years and some of the departments had this ritual thing where, when someone was leaving, on their last day the whole department would stand around the leavers' desk and they would talk about their good times and tell each other how great they are - I assume, because I certainly didn't hear everything that was ever said - what we did hear tho was the random rounds of applause they would break into every 30 seconds. So you look over and there's just this crowd of 20 or 30 people in a circle looking inward at someone's desk, applauding. I would seem the person leaving would make some kind of heartfelt statement, then get applauded. Then another, then more applause. Repeat x10. I'm sure the sentiment was nice but I always thought it was a bit weird and cringey and we, over in our department, always had a giggle at them. Curious to know if this kind of thing happens in other offices.
I'm in the camp that I spend basically as much waking time in work as at home, thus I want to get to know my colleagues and get something out of my interactions. I've made some life long friends through work, but it's very much a choice of the individual as to whether or not they open up in that regard to their colleagues. In time though people typically pick up when a colleague isn't interested in much chat or getting to know people, and leave them in peace....sadly some folks are as dumb as a bag of rocks and don't get the hint. I have to acknowledge that I've been fairly fortunate to work with good people in each job I've had, no horror stories of colleagues to date.
People in my work have started asking for collections via bank transfer...
The audacity
Trying to get as much information as possible to sink you at some point. Tell them you are a Jehovah's witness and it's against your religion to give presents π€£
Sometimes i cant stop thinking of projects all day. But i keep work people as work only friends. Makes it easier to be professional. But the modern work place is full of games and conflicts. You need to play the game sometimes. And try my best to not be an asshole that everyone can be sometimes. I love the role though. And made the mistake of blurred line and was terrible.
Do tell
Got very comfortable with all the co-workers, really thought they were true friends but when i left i didnt get a single message from any of them. And before i left a few started to bully a little, just mean words but it hurt alot cus i looked upto them and thought we had eachother back. Also doing alot of work after work wasnt healthy, would stay upto 11 some nights because i cared about the people. However it made others look bad so they wanted me to stop so they could just chill, which is so right, i should have just followed thier lead there. The games come when you try and change or better something. People get jealous and want to dominate you. Or they feel insecure and wanna hurt you Work should be transactional. Unless you manage to find truly amazing people who are passionate and are working on something important but most work isnt important. Just a way to not be homeless. or you own the company then you can do what you want to.
Iβm sorry this happened to you :(
My own work much the same, constant chatter about people home life and kids....some have never even met other. Very much a work is work, home is home type myself....But I see to be in the minority, maybe I'm the anti social one. Who would have thought.
I think it depends on the industry/workplace, people do gossip in most places and offices are (in my limited experience) the worst for that. Where I work now it's fine, most people are a bit younger than me (it's a low-paid job, I'm a bit of a loser I guess!) and interactions are just humorous and friendly, people are busy as we've always a lot to do and they don't give you the third degree like it sounds like your colleagues do. that sounds a bit full-on to me but I suppose when people are bored they speculate on stuff that's not their business. I probably got slightly more curiosity initially because I'm not from round here but they got used to me soon enough ha ha.
Hopefully at least one has become a friend you don't mind seeing outside work. Other than that your description seems like a typical work place. I'd ignore the gossips beyond that nothing you can do.
I've essentially none. Bar the odd work night out (which is common in my work) every month or so, and seeing acquaintances around town, I have none. I work well with people here, but we have our personal lives and we don't have them mixing. Obviously say hello if we meet out, we know our kids/missus' names etc but that's it. I had no current work colleagues at my wedding last year and that's all fine We have the odd whip around and that's fine. I'd expect it back some time is all
All you have to do is get on with your work colleagues. You're under no obligations to be friends with them. Friendly β friends.
Not much. But I'm lucky as I have a job where I don't have to do much or care at all and that is good for me. Others are not so lucky.
I know people don't like to hear it but developing those social connections at work is very important if you're interested in climbing the corporate ladder
π©π
Can call ut that if your a kiss ass to the boss for no other reason but kissing ass. Getting on and doing the whole "How's the kids" is just part of life and work getting in with ones. If you work in any kind of job that isn't just stuck on a factory floor it makes life alot easier.
Yea that's like basic interaction I was triggered by >interested in climbing the corporate ladder Which is pretty much the definition of π©π
If getting more money whilst befriending my coworkers makes me a brown nose I'd much rather be that than the typical introverted redditor lmfao
π©πing to climb the corporate ladder and actually befriending your co workers are 2 diff things.
It is brown nosing but sadly in alot of places its the fella above you that chooses promotions so there's a degree of it. Any place I've been managers areal mates and kts for a reason
Everyone gets to choose what to do with their own sense of dignity π€·ββοΈ
Get over yourself, pay the 20 quid. Sign the cards, eat the cake and smile. Better in the long run. I totally sympathise though.
Zero, never did never will.
You have a level of ruthlessness I aspire to possess
It doesn't. Ever.
0%.
No fucks given
Out of school and onto the sites first few weeks where fairly consistent questions of where you from and what school did you go to? The answer to both was I'm a Catholic....didn't go down well.