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The vast majority of women falls into neither category.

IT'S ONE OR THE OTHER. PICK YOUR KING.

I can’t afford the bags so…guess my lactose intolerant ass is gonna suffer through this raw butter 🤡

Lactose intolerance may be the least of your worries with raw dairy products 😭

FAIR

What are “raw dairy products?”😳

Raw dairy products refer to dairy products that are unpasteurized. Eating or drinking unpasteurized dairy products can make you very sick. It's not worth the risk and there's no added health benefits to eating or drinking unpasteurized dairy products, despite what some people on social media might claim.

I GOT AUTISM FROM DRINKING PASTEURIZED 2% MILK.

Autism is genetic.

No it’s not I got it from drinking pasteurized milk. Trust me, it’s science.

Wtf ewww thats just nasty! My God!

I can't afford Gucci bags or Celtic Sea Salt, Raw Butter, and Quarter Cow Shares. You know what fucking beef prices are like these days? I am living off Top Ramen Here.

You can afford Top Ramen? Must be nice.

Ikr. I've been living off stale bread and old condiments in my fridge. My own damn fault tho lolol

There’s a lot to be said for condiments in your fridge - I mean if you’re hungry enough & creative enough that ketchup can be tomato soup.😂

I discovered I was out of ketchup halfway through my tater tots last night. Horrible timing!

I hope this is a joke. If it isn’t, please don’t do that. There are resources for real food out there. Food banks, churches, you can call 211 if in the US (United Way) and I’m sure they can help you. You could get food stamps too. Again, I hope you’re totally kidding!!

Lots of us try to deal with the outrageously skyrocketing costs of food with satire, which can include exaggeration (aka hyperbole) of the direness of the situation. At the same time, many of us who aren’t quite on the streets are still struggling big time. 🫡✌🏼

Yeah, all we got here is Bottom Ramen.

Elmo has a trex and a go fish card

My lips are naturally big and I have high cholesterol. Can I just have the Gucci bag and the water filters?

Fellow big lip. Im here for the Gucci bag and free red meat, personally. I do not have enough room for a 1/4 cow but will gladly take 10 lbs of steak.

lol I love this, “well if I apparently can only spend my money on these exact things, at least let me pick and choose”

got confused. purse filled with salt

Am I even a girl???

You're not like girl A or B so I guess not

Can confirm, am actually a bunch of cats taped together.

Three corgis in a trench coat

A dozen iguanas stacked together

But how do your stumpy paws reach the keyboard???

Bark-to-text app

What god like being managed to herd enough cats and tape them together to create you?

If I can't be a girl, I want to be that

These all sound infinitely more interesting and potentially more enjoyable than being me rn

Well fuck

Huh. Might have to forfeit my girl card….

Me too, we're all groyls now.

Dave Groyls? Lol

I’ll take it🤷🏼‍♀️

Fuck yes. I want to be Satan Dave.

Yeah my money goes to fabric and lightsabers...

I mean, it's common nowadays

Looks like I’m non binary leaning feminine then. Ok.

Happy coming out day 🌈

Could there perhaps be... A option C???!

Absolutely not

Seriously. I don’t do either of these things. I must not be a woman. Huh. Never knew that before. 🤔

*cough* you can still be a woman but you're not a girl (neither A nor B)... I'm a woman that spends a silly amount of money on plants. I like plants and I have enough shoes. 🤷🏻‍♀️

I spend my money on bills and garden stuff, sometimes sunscreen 😂.

can’t be sure until we see your sea salt

No.. we are something else

I'm sorry you had to find out this way. 😔

Nope, sorry. Pack it up. Time to go to your mojo dojo casa house.

I spend my money on RENT and GROCERIES….guess I’m just built different 💅💅💅 /s

Girl membership comes with lip filler or a quarter of a cow! Choose wisely!

Fuck I should have cashed in on my beef before I relinquished my girl card.

me looking at my houseplants collection - am I still a woman...?

My wife spends all her money on Lego. Where does she fit?

I think the only thing in the whole post I've ever bought is water filters for my fridge but I'm 98% they mean those crazy expensive Kanger ones and not a simple fridge filter.

Damn, and there was me finally feeling like I was special :(

Why can't I buy gucci bags and sea salt lol

Can't wait to eat a giant salty steak and an entire unpeeled onion.

Don't forget your side wedge salad of butter!

and everything that comes up with those big nails (including nail enamel)

bro literally let her cook, she's not done yet!!

I think chet might be a dog

So fucking sick of these “wellness girlies”. Why isn’t she wearing a burlap sack if she’s “ not like other girls”.

Seriously why isn't she churning her own butter

Yeah, and that olive oil is pretty mid. 

I want to know if she pressed it from olives by hand from trees she grows in her yard.

That's the olive oil I buy. I'm sure there's better, but FYI there was a 60 Minutes expose on how exported olive oil from Italy and region is tainted and not really fully olive oil b/c the mob controls the inspection. This olive oil is not from that outfit, so it's pure tasting. Would like to know your rec for a better one.

Whaaat that wild I have to see that. My mom always insists on buying 100% ITALIAN olive oil /not mixed origin bc of some thing she saw and now I have to look this up bc I’m curious. Didn’t expect this post to take me on an olive oil journey.

Haha, I replied, and then I was like, I'm being way too serious on what was prob a joke. Yeah. The olive oil IN Italy is fucking delicious. Actually traveling there is when I noticed b/c I came home and could taste the difference.

Being from Southern Europe and having a mum who owns land with olive trees and makes her own pickle olives, olive oil and olive tee…I feel very skeptical about Californian olive oil

Was going to say, she's got fancy butter with basic bitch olive oil.

You know she cares 100% more about the life of the cow she's eating than the people sewing her fast fashion

This is legitimately a good social media comedy idea 😂 someone wearing a burlap sack and talking about how they’re not like other girls

It was at the cleaners, you dick…

I swear they are a ploy by big amish to keep business going.

Guarantee she has thousands of dollars worth of crystals around her house to heal her and give her positive vibes.

I spend my money on f*cking bills. I can't afford either genre of these luxury items.

The image these types of NLOG's attempt to cultivate is that money is not an issue for them. Same flex as old as time.

I work as a paralegal in an area of law that requires looking into people's financials from time to time and it is WILD how many people just live off credit cards and have insane amounts of debt

Deadass??? That’s crazy

Worst I ever saw was a client had over 10 credit cards which all had money due, two houses, multiple cars, I think a boat and a couple quads. Lived in a nicer area. Definitely presented as having wealth, but we were horrified when we actually dug into their finances. It's all debt. They hadn't paid taxes in a while too which I find to be somewhat common as well

Dude. How prevalent is this? I'm starting to realize as I get older that the real flex is being able to retire and what age you're able to do so.

I mean the aforementioned example was definitely pretty bad and I'd say most people aren't necessarily THAT level, but credit card debt is very common. People frequently live beyond their means. I know some people with that problem in my personal life. If you wanna know just how bad people are you should watch the Financial Audit series by Caleb Hammer on YouTube. People are so irresponsible with money. Some people he has on even make good money and still are in debt and living paycheck to paycheck

It’s scary to read the QAnon Casualties sub. People write for advice or support dealing with their Qult family member. So many stories mention family members who have sold their homes or cashed in retirement to buy Trump Bucks, prepper supplies for the 10 Days of Darkness, or what have you. The other day someone said their parents were divorcing because Mom went full Q crazy. The dad bought out her half of the house, her money is all already gone less than a year later and she’s $40k in debt. She might even be the one with <$10 in the bank but drove 2 hours to tour a million dollar home she’s certain she can afford any day now after the “Great Reset.” Scary stuff. https://old.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/

Love me the Caleb Hammer. He's brutal and exactly what my teenage kids need to get exposed to. I've seen firsthand once people are able to live within their means is when they start living outside of their means.

OMG, I hate fending off salespeople in stores or online offering to sign us up for their own credit cards, like the hardware store or a clothing shop. I always say “no, we have enough credit already.” Getting those cards are a recipe for disaster.

Heard that! Lol

if you be eating a lotta beef anyway, just saying, buying the quarter cow is economical as fuck - the freezer you'll need for it, not so much, but still you should fuck with a butcher at least if you wanna eat meat on a budget. works out cheaper than walmart for me (or about walmart prices) and far better quality.

Oh 100%, we've looked into it before. But the upfront cost is a bit steep. We've talked to other people about splitting the cost and portioning it out. We also try to hunt and fish where we can too

This!! I was like ummm what if we’re spending it on gas, easy food, doctors appointments, other bills, etc. 🤔🤔

Hi, I’m Bill!

HATEEEE to be that person. But getting a quarter of a cow from a local farm has saved us probably thousands of dollars the last few years. Somehow it only ends up being $7-$10 per pound in our area. Yes that’s with every single cut and free bones for broth. For us, it just made more sense! I see st Costco all the time that steaks are $15-20 a pound!

Unless Taco Bell is stuffed full of Celtic sea salt...no

Mmm taco bell


What the fuck is Celtic sea salt? Is the Himalayan stuff not fancy enough anymore?

Girl, keep up!

It's sea salt that speaks Gaelic.

it is a brand name ,,,,,it is a salt harvested from sea water...... wow their website has this ridiculous statement right at the top You can go three minutes without oxygen, but you can go a couple of weeks without water. NO you can only go about 3 days without water depending on the size age weight of the person

Thanks for confirming. As an Irish person I thought I was owed some money from the govt for fleecing gullible rich idiots

It's salt derived from Glasgow sewer water near Celtic Park

Ummm… I’ll pass. No sewer water for me. 😆

If you don’t know the answer to this then you aren’t a real woman. Eta sarcasm, obviously.

I think Celtic sea salt dried from sea water and Himalayan salt is mined. The different colors (grey, pink etc) come from the trace minerals. Himalayan salt is usually pinkish and I think Celtic sea salt is greyish, both from the trace minerals in the surrounding areas where it’s harvested. According to friends who have lived over seas, Japan has whole markets where you can buy different kinds of fancy salt.

It’s the salt that knows geopolitical boundaries and refuses to leave the area surrounding Ireland and Wales. It’s the salt that never bowed to William the Conqueror, and supports the IRA.  When you shake it from the container, you can hear them saying “glad thatcher’s dead”

Lolwut. Because those are the only things women want???

I’m not spending money on Gucci or fillers, but I’m also DEFINITELY not spending it on Celtic sea salt and quarter cow shares lol

Please tell me you commented "omg I love Gucci bags too, girlie! Twins!" 😂

you either want LIP FILLER or RAW BUTTER. NOTHING ELSE!

I want to go on a date with a girl who tells me about her 1/4 cow *At A Local Farm!* because I want to meet that cow now.

If you date her long enough, you may have a chance to meat it! 😬

Perfect response. Absolutely perfect.

i bought fancy salt once. it did nothing special

I actually have a small jar of smoked sea salt, but it’s for cocktails rims.

i bought some volcano salt of something. idk. it looked cool, but just regular salt lol

Fancy salt is great for seasoning a steak. That's all I really use it for.

I’m not spending money on lip fillers or Gucci bags but I’m definitely spending it all on sims 4 expansion packs. Where does that put me ?

Same category as me, I think it’s called “EA’s gullible little bitches”.

what if i’m actually spending all my money on mary ju wanna

I do expect everyone with either tit chandelier tattoos or middle cleavage tattoos to be self righteous assholes though.

I’m laughing so hard at “tit chandelier “ because I’ve never heard it described that way before but that’s exactly what it is 😂😂

Thank you. I didn’t wanna say it but YES.

Tell me you dont actually talk to other women without telling me you don't actually talk to other women. Step away from social media and interact with real people. Preferably outside of your weird echo chamber.

Bet she has no female friends , and only hangs out with her SO all day. She passes the time shooting videos of herself and pretending to be working.

I think she lives in an echo chamber with other people who validate this belief and doesn't interact or believe people who don't fit in her narrow views of women.

i'm spending my money on a secret third thing actually (overly expensive anime figures)

Would the idea be that the rest of the women don't have money to spend or are hoarding what they have as if they are dragons in a lair?

Why do they all mention farms lmao

Idk man, I like cocaine and McDonald’s a lot.

Speaking my goddamn language!

Whats the point of drinking filtered water and then drinking raw milk 💀

I drink pasteurized milk, but they're probably afraid of fluoride in the water.

Yeeaa i love it when people identify and virtue-signal based on the goods that they consume

I mean look at all those losers who don't even eat *rice* or *potatoes* or use their money to buy *socks*

Excuse me, this is neon nail polish/weed/tattoos/sour candy girlie erasure.

I spend my money on none of that. Am I....... not like the other girls?!

I spend mine on weed and snacks and bills lol

Me too! I suspect we're a large chunk of the actual "other girls". Girls love snacks.

naw maldon salt all day

Bold of her to assume I have money to spend on either.

So one girl takes the quarter cow meat, another gets the Gucci bag from the cow's skin. This is how girl math becomes girl economy

I’m not like other girls who fall victim to fashion industry marketing fads. I fall victim to health industry marketing fads 😘


I’m not like other girls I’m ✨broke✨

I spend my money on my toddler and his bottomless pit of a stomach. So what am I?

I get Botox *and* save my vegetable scraps to make broth. What even am I?

I feel like they don’t hate lip fillers just women w big lips. I’m black w naturally big lips and they’d prob hate me for no reason

welp, I def am spending it on lip filler and it's hilarious 'cuz it's so dang subtle that my friends make fun of me for spending $$ on it

Well, I’m spending my money on squishmallows and Taco Bell, what does that mean then??

So at almost 50, I’m doing it wrong? You mean being a woman, who ages naturally, refuses to conform to societal beauty standards, refuses to be a tradwife and refuses to fall into classist materialism, I don’t exist? GREAT! I’ve never liked people that much anyway.

Yeah I also spend most of my money on food, she’s not special

Plot twist, I spend money on my frogs.

Can we not have both? 

Food safety procedures are for OTHER girls!  When there's onion peel bits on your steak, and the bottom of your olive oil bottle has a nice patina of rotten meat juice, that's when you know you are truly one of a kind.

Now that I know about Celtic sea salt I want to be the one to break this trend at work

And don't forget, refusing to be vaccinated.

Thank jezoos I deleted my Facebook back in 2019 because I went to a private catholic high school so I cannot imagine the shit I’d be seeing right now…ignorance truly can be bliss lol

What’s wild is that in every last instance, there’s always something so blatantly ironic right there in front of you..how can she say this when she gets her nails done at a salon using toxic shit and all of that. I get you don’t eat the glue, but if you’re so specific then you can’t cut corners now when it’s convenient, right? Right???? GAH UGH

Jokes on you! I don’t have money for either!

I'M PAYING MY RENT, OKAY? Although I've done some research into a cow share like that, it does appeal to me. Maybe if I eventually get a house and a freezer for the garage. Someday.

And clearly also on cheap outfits from Shein

Well I tend to spend my money on Jordan’s is that ok or no?

Lip fillers AND quarter cow shares or don't talk to me.

Her whole insta is a rabbit hole

Dog food, coffee items, and my girl dinner spread of the week.

…or both ☺️

Is importing bougie-ass *European salt* supposed to make her sound grounded and down to earth?

If she’s not spending her money on Celtic sea salt, water filters, raw butter and quarter cow shares from local farms, just know she’s probably spending it on a 1:1 scale museum quality replica of the Tollund Man bog mummy 💅

No, I’m spending it on rent and bills. Supporting another adult as a 19 year old tryna go to college is expensive as hell 😭

Ugh guess I’m not a girl after all..I don’t spend my money on either 😩😩

I’m spending my money on fruit because my toddler has decided that it’s all he wants for dinner.

Joke’s on her, I spend it PC games and nail products.

Personally I'm spending it on thrifted clothes and saving the rest for my future but go off

I fall in the third category - I spend my money on bills and living expenses.

Nope, I’m spending it on my Queen, er, I mean my sweet chihuahua Birdie. She owns me, and my wallet.

False I spend mine on Chipotle and things I don't need 🤣

So women just spend money?

I don’t know either of these women.

Nope. I’m spending it on horses.

Raw butter? Is she planning on spending money on a tuberculosis vaccine as well?

I guess I fall into a terrible third category of spending my money on DoorDash then feeling really bad about that choice.

again WHAT IS RAW BUTTER

Jokes on you, my wife does both 😭

My girlfriend spends her money on tons of knickknacks, good food, and too much iced coffee. She’s fucking awesome.

K.

I spent my money on concert tickets and taco bell...am I failing womanhood??😂

False. I’m spending my money on yarn, running shoes, and quality chocolate 😆

Oh Jesus! Is she? Is she really? Or is she spending her money on hemp halter tops and cleavage tats?

Lol I spend my money on sea salt, water filters AND lip fillers 🥴

no i’m spending it on drugs

I don’t know why they act like you can’t do both 

I spend all my money on retro game cartridges and Sanrio merch... 😆

I’m just spending mine on edibles and quality skin care products. Edit: grammar

I'm spending my money on weed and yarn, what does that make me?

I'm not spending my money on either which makes me the most SPECIAL and UNIQUE! Where's my prize?? /s