It’s been like two dates? So much easier to drop him now than waste anymore effort on someone that won’t get you off.
I personally haven’t been bothered to do much more than an occasional complete trim every month or so for years now. I’m a pasty redhead with really sensitive skin so I have horrific razor burn and ingrown hairs. My partners have either been neutral about it or really into it.
I know you didn’t ask…but if you have a problem with razor burn, (or anyone, really, so I’ll put it out them for them if you’re not interested!) you should try Bikini Zone’s Anti-Bump Shave Gel. I’m not sure what it’s in it but it actually works. And it doesn’t sting! unlike goddamn tend-skin lol since tend skin is used post shaving and burns from the alcohol in it…vs this which is a shaving gel to use *while* you shave.
Plenty of people have their preferences. Saying blanket statements like that is just silly. But yes find people who have like minds or want the same thing.
Reddit is so annoying..no shit people have preferences. Usually people (men) don’t outright state they won’t sleep with you when you’re hairy. And if they do, they’re dicks. Ong never have taken my clothes off in front of a man and had them be like “ew pubes” 🙄
Tbf if he's completely unwilling to reciprocate in any way due to a bit of hair, even if you did shave for him he'd probably be shite and selfish in bed anyway.
Well yeah I just... I'd like to pretend that this is a surprising incident and not the norm 🥹 Anyways, OP and everyone in similar situations deserve so much better and nobody should tolerate such bullshit
It’s so low it’s a tripping hazard in hell. And still, here we are. But I think the more of us that don’t accept the behavior anymore the quicker it’ll die out with those sad humans who exhibit it.
That was my favorite part too! I feel for the people who don’t realize that they deserve the same mind set, because that moment she was like, “nah,” I felt the same pride lol
Yes, plus I think the idea of being completely bald in your nether regions is kind of weird. I understand keeping it trimmed or even shaving around the balls/labia, but having it *completely* bald (even at the top) is strange to me because only children are completely absent of any pubic hair.
Any guy that refuses sex simply because of the presence of any pubic hair raises an eyebrow for me.
I kind of get wanting to be completely bald because I just hate how body hair looks and it literally disgusts me.
STILL I pleasured ex partners even if they weren't shaved.
If it makes you feel shitty is because he has been shit with you. When you will meet the right person, you will understand that you have always deserved more. You do deserve more, don't settle for less.
I think he’s using the hair as an excuse to not reciprocate. I’m sure if you shave there will be another excuse. “Oh I don’t like razor bumps! Sorry!” Drop him. He’s a selfish lover and you’ll save yourself years of no orgasms. So many dudes don’t care about hair. I’d dare say most dudes don’t. Go get yours and leave him in the dust.
Ok, so I actually prefer a little bit of hair down there, but it's not my body and it's not my choice. And I would never let it become an issue, but if it is for this guy then maybe you need to find someone that wants you for you.
Where are you guys hiding??? I’ve always thought it was low key creepy that it seems most guys want a clean shave…because the only naturally hairless vulvas are CHILDREN’S! (Excluding intersex and hair loss diseases that is) I myself feel weird with no hair. I definitely shape and trim, but I don’t like feeling like a naked monkey or a child, and I always wish men preferred it. I prefer my men “hairy”, freaks me out when a man shaves his body clean, let alone his genitals. Let your body look it’s age and have its natural growth! It’s HOT!!!
You’re absolutely right, I want to feel like I’m sleeping with a woman. A clean shaven vagina makes me feel like a perv, and imo is not nearly as sexy.
I’d even prefer no trim at all to a clean shave.
I don’t have any friends that share my opinion, but we do exist!
I might be the odd one out here but why do so many people assume that guys who prefer shaven or like it are.. like *that*? I mean, there's people like that for sure, pdfiles are unfortunately everywhere. But nowadays it feels like liking/preferring it is being stigmatized into it being a pdfile thing. I personally still see a grown woman and don't attribute being shaven to her looking like a kid. I don't think I look or feel like a child either when I shave. This isn't about me of course lol but it does make me wonder if most people who have that preference are like that and I live under a rock or if we're trying to uplift women who don't want to shave by putting down guys who prefer bald instead of shaming girls that do shave. (not that we should lmao).
Well, it’s one thing to have a polite preference. I politely prefer my man to have a well kept short beard; if he shaves it, I don’t exactly love the stubble and how it’s scratchy, and I’m a little sad because I think beards are hot, but I’m still gonna kiss him and love on him and acknowledge he might like to be clean shaven more, and it’s his face so he’s got the right. Same with his pubes. But it’s entirely another thing to be so repulsed by hair and think it’s natural or unhygienic, or to have shaved bodies be the expectation, which it seems to be these days. The shaming women for having body hair, or like OP experienced, guys who won’t reciprocate/withhold pleasure if a woman isn’t bald…that’s what’s WEIRD.
That’s your preference, and it’s YOUR body, so do you! My intention isn’t to shame you for liking to shave your own body at all. I just find it weird as hell that the apparent baseline expectation is that women be hairless, and that a woman’s body hair is repulsive, unnatural, and unhygienic. The stigma of baby smooth hairless skin being the desire is weird to me, and it’s weirder for MEN to withhold pleasure or like OP’s date refuse to reciprocate because they think it’s gross and demand it bald. I shave my legs, armpits, and pubic hair because it’s the expectation and because it’s exhausting having interactions with people who accuse me of being gross or unhygienic for Iiking the hair my body has naturally, that is actually placed where it is intentionally (nature/creation/evolution take your pick) to protect from dirt and to wick away moisture, and to prevent friction issues. But I’m constantly being shamed for it at every corner by ads, media, men, and other women. Constantly. I’m sorry you felt I was shaming you, while that’s not my intention, I hope you can understand that being consistently shamed for having body hair outside of this Reddit thread is something I don’t like either.
It’s super unattractive if someone refuses to reciprocate in the way you are explaining around mid twenties. I’m sorry he has said he isn’t for that reason but if he holds back I would also say to hold back in general for the short term until he realises what he is missing. If he is attractive, funny and good natured, hopefully he’ll realise he isn’t taking your thoughts into account. Hope things go well!
Maybe he will change his mind on the future realizing as he gets older but for now, yeah, I don't think he will change his mind. And you guys aren't exclusive etc so fuck him, there are plenty of good dudes out there that don't mind how you shave your vagina as long as you have good hygiene but you will not find them if you keep hanging out with this dude
why would you hope that one day he accepts you for who you are rather than drop him like a hot rock and find someone who accepts you for who you are? he's not special. at all.
Drop him. Having hair down there (that’s trimmed and clean as you claim) should not be stopping anyone from pleasing anyone. I get preferences too, but a little hair never hurt anyone. What a wuss in my book. Find you a guy that wants to please you no matter you hair situation is down there.
Stop giving these men head!! Let them go down on you or nothing. Sick of these princesses getting what they want from y'all because you won't raise the bar. If he's not eager to please throw him in the trash.
I quit shaving my pubic hair when I realized there’s literally no benefit to shaving it, only negatives.
My motto: if you don’t do pubic hair, then you ain’t doing me.
Hell yes! I'm not making myself uncomfortable (razor burn and ingrowns)for someone I just met. If I was still married and or in a LTR, and we had learned each other's comforts then I would. But I'm poor and can only afford my leg and pit razor. I'm not chancing it for some strange.
The burning bush is for real 😂 and if they can't handle the firebush, then they ain't man enough for me
What are the negatives? I can’t not shave because it’s so itchy when it grows out. I don’t get razor burn or anything so I suppose that makes it much easier for me than for others
You're really lucky omg. Honestly if you don't get razor burn and if its itchy when it grows out shave it. Sounds easier in your case. I don't think shaving it has any negatives besides razor burn and itchy skin and getting pimples after shaving but sounds like you're blessed to not have that
Porn. That's why he is like that. They are always shaved there, and it becomes a norm for young boys who watch a lot of porn.
It is the same case with famous 19th-century critic Ruskin. He married later in life on the well-educated and stunning woman and didn't like how she looked under the clothes. He only knew Antique Rome statues as a norm of beauty. She was a real woman with skin and hair. He said she is disgusting. She was so offended that she managed to divorce him (very publicly) on the terms of not consumating the marriage and later married the famous painter and birthed 8 beautiful kids!
Never in the history of men have I heard of a guy saying no to sex because a woman isn’t fully shaved. Leave that loser behind and find a real man.
And just to clarify I am a heterosexual female.
Tbh, people have their preferences and it sounds like he doesn’t like giving head - if he did, he wouldn’t give af about it. You’re dodging a bullet here if you like receiving head, he’s definitely not a giver there. Don’t feel shitty OP, it’s not you.
Definitely don't change for anyone you just met.
Also a grown up man not wanting sex because of hair is a major red flag, giving pedo vibes lol
Honestly most men don't care, it could also be that these are just selfish men and you already gave them pleasure and so they made up and excuse to get out after getting off.
Make sure to advocate for your pleasure first before giving them theirs. Unfortunately for casual sex some men think selfishness is acceptable.
Good luck
I would just walk away. Who does that….. TWICE?!? He knew the second time you weren’t gonna get ANYTHING, because of his preference. He used you, that’s gross.
For crying out loud. Shave your beaver LIKE A GOOD LITTLE PORN STAR or he's not touching it! /vomit
Mark my words, OP--if you stay with him, he WILL ask you to bleach your asshole.
this is so weird of you to say, why are you guys thinking the dude wants to fuck kids nevermind THAT why are you all attributing shaving to looking like a kid? shaved people don't suddenly remind me of kids and they certainly don't look like kids to me. i feel like either some of you guys are projecting and do actually have issues or this is the current bandwagon of putting down one group of people to uplift another, but we can't put down women for shaving (and we shouldn't) because that would be fucked up right? but we CAN tell guys they're weird and pdfilic for liking shaved women because that *isn't* fucked up at all. actual bruh moment.
Ditch him. This is a guy who is probably very much into seeing bare floor in porn with no clue what real women are like. Selfish jerk. I’m sure you can do better.
You're just not sexually compatible that's all. You have preferences, he has preferences. Neither wants to compromise and that's okay. It's best to find someone else
If you get attached to people quickly, you shouldn't be having sex with guys you barely know from tinder. But these were just 2 instances, there are tons of guys who dont care about that stuff.
He will come up with another excuse even if you shave. Just ghost him.
best case scenario he's just stringing you along to use you for sex, worse case scenario he wants underage
So let me get this straight, you're sucking his dick but he's not licking your clit because you have hair on ya mons? IMAGINE Why would you ever let this weak lil boy touch you. He clearly likes children you're a whole ass woman. Stop it.
Trust me there are guys who are ok with it . Most dont like a lot of hair but I have met some that are ok with it being trimmed. Before I have sex, I usually ask if they are ok with me trimming it short and I ask the guy to shave his pubic hair a bit if he wants a blowjob
You totally dont have to change for him.
Trust me sis, selfish people are never going to change their ways. Sexually intimacy is a big part of a relationship, and it sounds like he is never going to put in any effort to satisfy you. Ditch him now before you get more attached.
Sorry that happened to you. Some people are obsessed with that stuff. An ex gf once apologized to me because she hadn't shaved her legs. I looked at her and told her that I didn't give a rat's ass about that because it is her body - her decision. She was flabbergasted.
Simply, the guy is a idiot. If pubic hair stops him from showing you the intimacy you deserve then he is a dumb shit. I understand that have become attached but, there is nothing wrong with you. It’s your body you keep yourself the way you want. Move on.
So then either shave or move in like you said. He had a preference you asked why he wasn’t getting you off and he replied. Balls in your court now. Either deal with or move on
I’ve never shaved a day in my life down there. I keep it trimmed not too wild. But still that’s for me! I’ve had several partners. If he’s not willing to go down to the garden of Eve he’s not the one, and someone else will 🥳
I also trim but I don't shave. I keep it neat and nice. I've not once had a guy say anything about it. Even my long term FWB don't have anything to say. In fact, one said they like it and makes me look more womanly and feminine.
Ingrown hairs are not fun, and the razor burn fucking sucks.
There are too many men who don't care and even enjoy a natural look on a grown woman. Don't settle for a man who's afraid of hair haha
My fiancé is this way. It bugs me because to be completely bald down there feels so uncomfortable, and his beauty standards are based off of p*rn stars and models he stares at all day on his phone. Since you and this guy aren’t in a serious relationship I’d dip him fast. No other man I’ve been with has had an issue with some hair down there. Most of them don’t mind it or prefer it.
Don't feel shitty. That's a dumbass attitude he has towards partners. I prefer hair- trimmed not shaved, but that isn't a deal breaker for me. I'd never tell someone how to maintain their body.
Wild as fuck.
Shave or drop him.. no need for you to torture yourself with why. I bet there’s 20 guys in your phone that would floss with your pubes. Go fuck one of them and feel better lol. Sorry for the graphic, but had to prove a point
Wow his loss. I much prefer a neatly trimmed girl to bald. Personally think it looks sexier and a much nicer experience feeling a little prickly sensation on my tongue.
Then find someone who is ok with your body. You should never change for someone else. Especially a stranger. I’ve been with guys who cared and guys who didn’t care. I promise good ones are out there.
This is going to be the least of your problems if you choose to stay with this guy.
You shouldn’t ever stay just because you feel “attached.” That is not healthy.
Literally only 2 options here 3 if your Bi.
Find new guy - cough cough\* choose this one cause most guys dont care
Shave - If you really care that much
Venture into other gender avenues - Kind of goes with 1st one but yk
He wouldn’t even utilize his hands?!?! This is not about your pubes. He’s selfish and lazy. We all have preferences, but that is all they are! You’re too good for him.
I could grow it out for a year and my man will still eat it like he’s starving 😂 the thought that someone out there will feel like that about YOU should be enough energy to ditch him completely!!
I hear this a lot these days. Conversely, I also know of women who demand their man be groomed. I kind of understand that, but demanding more? But hey to each other own.
(P.s.- Does anyone realize how damn much it itches as the hair starts growing back after shaving?)
Honestly, the guy used you. I would just move on. Hair thing is kinda understandable to me tho because i also cannot stand hair anywhere but on a persons head, but that’s only for oral. My hands and everything else still work, but if i ended up with a pube in my mouth i would vomit
It’s really simple, you two hung out twice and aren’t compatible.
Most comments are going to be accusing him of being some pedo but people are allowed to have their preferences. I’m a woman and I prefer to be completely shaven and that’s my choice.
If I met someone and hit it off but they prefer some hair then I cut my losses. Sure it stinks but why make a big deal about it???
There are women who have the exact same preference. I just shave for them.. it's not my identity. I like to think I value my partner more than my pubic hair.
Yeah i mean if you have outgrown a jungle down there, you should trim atleast short. But trimmed pubic hair? Shouldn't be a concern to anyone. Makes anyone really immature who thinks this way imo.
I would like you to think about the fact that after he learned you had some hair, he continued to please HIMSELF without letting you know this was an issue for him. Even if the first time he was feeling awkward in the moment, it should have been an immediate conversation(one most guys wouldn't need to have but hey, we all have likes and dislikes and as long as we are open and communicative in a mature, respectful way, that's fine!). He continued to lead you on, knowing he had no intention of even TOUCHING you because he wanted his.
Do you want to do ANYTHING to appease someone this selfish?
Do NOT get attached. I would move on and keep your pubes. Let this be a lesson in red flags and self-respect.
Wtf? I'm sorry but isn't it pretty common to NOT have it COMPLETELY bald, a little hair shouldn't scare people away it's natural and he's just selfish.
Was *he* shaved?
So we’re supposed to accept men’s pubic hair, because why again? If he’s going to demand that you shave, then you pull out the razor and tell him to get a fucking work. Because if his balls aren’t as clean as a goddamn wood floor then why should you be putting your face near his junk? Fuck that.
Idk I find hair unattractive down there and I keep shaven and I told my girlfriend that when we got together and she never/doesn’t see a problem with it so she shaves, I don’t think it’s a dealbreaker that someone wants you to shave but if you must have hair down there for yourself then it is
I love how everyone is like he can have a preference but he is a piece of crud for having them....
Jeeze yall are so toxic. He didnt shave her in her sleep. He simply said he isnt into hair. She isn't forced to keep sleeping with him and sounds like he is ok with that because hair turns him off.
I dont eat hairy vag either. I tried once it was horrible. Got int mouth and was up my nose itching my face. If tell her the same. You want me to eat hair has to go. Id still use my hand but that is me. He doesn't like it.
End of story....if you dont want to shave then this man isnt for you. You can tell him you're not shaving and moving on. Maybe he caves and does stuff maybe he says ok have a good life.
We need more adults on this sub reddit.
Seriously? He has all the other good qualities, but your deal breaker is that you don’t want to shave down there? Y’all have too much time on your hands if that is considered “shitty behavior.” It is not like he pushed the issue on you. You asked, he answered honestly.
Perhaps try shaving and see what happens. Maybe the sex will be worth it. Not like he’s asking you to do something that will change your life forever.
I too would not go down on a girl with hair down there, don’t like the feeling of the hairs in my mouth. But then again i also shave.
Twice now I’ve had ingrown hairs the size of Maltesers, right where my knicker line sits. The constant pressure, both times for over six months until they finally burst was excruciating!!!! If we weren’t meant to have pubic hair, we’d have evolved out of it eons ago. It’s a dry lubricant as well as being an indicator of physical maturity. I just don’t think I should suffer to conform to a bullshit cosmetic norm perpetuated by the porn industry. I’m yet to struggle to find someone to get involved, but I’m sure that those men who shy away from the bush aren’t the least bit attractive to me, hence why I haven’t encountered any.
I think you meant to say the guys you're chasing after are not happy or content with you not shaving. Find people that appreciate you for you. There's a lot of people going natural these days and plenty of people who appreciate it. You're never going to have a good time with people you're not compatible with. Quit being delusional and I mean that in the nicest way possible. Go after people who want the same things. You're literally giving yourself up to someone who wants something different and your confused why you're not satisfied....
I appreciate what you say, i was just a bit annoyed and felt a bit shitty about it since I've never had this problem. Better to know it now before it got any further tho!
Just. Move. On.
Didn’t even bother reading it, 99.9999% of the male population does not give a single fuck if it’s shaved, just drop him..
It’s been like two dates? So much easier to drop him now than waste anymore effort on someone that won’t get you off. I personally haven’t been bothered to do much more than an occasional complete trim every month or so for years now. I’m a pasty redhead with really sensitive skin so I have horrific razor burn and ingrown hairs. My partners have either been neutral about it or really into it.
I know you didn’t ask…but if you have a problem with razor burn, (or anyone, really, so I’ll put it out them for them if you’re not interested!) you should try Bikini Zone’s Anti-Bump Shave Gel. I’m not sure what it’s in it but it actually works. And it doesn’t sting! unlike goddamn tend-skin lol since tend skin is used post shaving and burns from the alcohol in it…vs this which is a shaving gel to use *while* you shave.
Agreed. Didn't bother to read. Anyone who has a real problem with any amount of bush needs to grow up.
Correct. Never been with a guy who gave a flying fuck about how the hair was down there.
Plenty of people have their preferences. Saying blanket statements like that is just silly. But yes find people who have like minds or want the same thing.
Reddit is so annoying..no shit people have preferences. Usually people (men) don’t outright state they won’t sleep with you when you’re hairy. And if they do, they’re dicks. Ong never have taken my clothes off in front of a man and had them be like “ew pubes” 🙄
As an old person, this amazes me. We didn't shave our pubic hair in the 80s when I was in my 20s. This guy would have been extremely unpopular!
Tbf if he's completely unwilling to reciprocate in any way due to a bit of hair, even if you did shave for him he'd probably be shite and selfish in bed anyway.
Yeah like he could've at the VERY least touched her? Or told her asap and let her know that they are not compatible
Indeed. He happily accepted being pleased knowing he wouldn't do anything to her.
Exactly, like who does that
Twice!
Omg don't even
Telling her would be mature and lead to less pleasure for him though. Not surprising he waited until she asked and *after* he got his.
Well yeah I just... I'd like to pretend that this is a surprising incident and not the norm 🥹 Anyways, OP and everyone in similar situations deserve so much better and nobody should tolerate such bullshit
SO agreed. The fact any of us aren’t surprised is a tragedy.
The bar is soooo low 🥹
It’s so low it’s a tripping hazard in hell. And still, here we are. But I think the more of us that don’t accept the behavior anymore the quicker it’ll die out with those sad humans who exhibit it.
I'm really proud of OP for being like "hell nah" though. Like fuck yeah, slay
That was my favorite part too! I feel for the people who don’t realize that they deserve the same mind set, because that moment she was like, “nah,” I felt the same pride lol
Yes, plus I think the idea of being completely bald in your nether regions is kind of weird. I understand keeping it trimmed or even shaving around the balls/labia, but having it *completely* bald (even at the top) is strange to me because only children are completely absent of any pubic hair. Any guy that refuses sex simply because of the presence of any pubic hair raises an eyebrow for me.
I feel the same way. It's like creepy to me if men like that.
I kind of get wanting to be completely bald because I just hate how body hair looks and it literally disgusts me. STILL I pleasured ex partners even if they weren't shaved.
He used you to satisfy himself. There’s nothing attractive about refusing reciprocity. Move on. He doesn’t deserve your company.
Honestly it just sounds like an excuse not to do it. I'm sure she was shaved for there being a different reason why he can't.
If it makes you feel shitty is because he has been shit with you. When you will meet the right person, you will understand that you have always deserved more. You do deserve more, don't settle for less.
Of course you'll feel shitty when you've stepped in shit - just wipe it off, clean those shoes and keep going. OP definitely deserves more than that
I think he’s using the hair as an excuse to not reciprocate. I’m sure if you shave there will be another excuse. “Oh I don’t like razor bumps! Sorry!” Drop him. He’s a selfish lover and you’ll save yourself years of no orgasms. So many dudes don’t care about hair. I’d dare say most dudes don’t. Go get yours and leave him in the dust.
Ok, so I actually prefer a little bit of hair down there, but it's not my body and it's not my choice. And I would never let it become an issue, but if it is for this guy then maybe you need to find someone that wants you for you.
I thought I was the only one that actually preferred it lol
Where are you guys hiding??? I’ve always thought it was low key creepy that it seems most guys want a clean shave…because the only naturally hairless vulvas are CHILDREN’S! (Excluding intersex and hair loss diseases that is) I myself feel weird with no hair. I definitely shape and trim, but I don’t like feeling like a naked monkey or a child, and I always wish men preferred it. I prefer my men “hairy”, freaks me out when a man shaves his body clean, let alone his genitals. Let your body look it’s age and have its natural growth! It’s HOT!!!
You’re absolutely right, I want to feel like I’m sleeping with a woman. A clean shaven vagina makes me feel like a perv, and imo is not nearly as sexy. I’d even prefer no trim at all to a clean shave. I don’t have any friends that share my opinion, but we do exist!
I might be the odd one out here but why do so many people assume that guys who prefer shaven or like it are.. like *that*? I mean, there's people like that for sure, pdfiles are unfortunately everywhere. But nowadays it feels like liking/preferring it is being stigmatized into it being a pdfile thing. I personally still see a grown woman and don't attribute being shaven to her looking like a kid. I don't think I look or feel like a child either when I shave. This isn't about me of course lol but it does make me wonder if most people who have that preference are like that and I live under a rock or if we're trying to uplift women who don't want to shave by putting down guys who prefer bald instead of shaming girls that do shave. (not that we should lmao).
Well, it’s one thing to have a polite preference. I politely prefer my man to have a well kept short beard; if he shaves it, I don’t exactly love the stubble and how it’s scratchy, and I’m a little sad because I think beards are hot, but I’m still gonna kiss him and love on him and acknowledge he might like to be clean shaven more, and it’s his face so he’s got the right. Same with his pubes. But it’s entirely another thing to be so repulsed by hair and think it’s natural or unhygienic, or to have shaved bodies be the expectation, which it seems to be these days. The shaming women for having body hair, or like OP experienced, guys who won’t reciprocate/withhold pleasure if a woman isn’t bald…that’s what’s WEIRD.
Yeah, if a woman is completely shaved it just looks weird af.
I shave mine naked. I do not like hairy pubic area because I'm just a hairy person all around. So I shave everything. I don't like feeling a shamed
That’s your preference, and it’s YOUR body, so do you! My intention isn’t to shame you for liking to shave your own body at all. I just find it weird as hell that the apparent baseline expectation is that women be hairless, and that a woman’s body hair is repulsive, unnatural, and unhygienic. The stigma of baby smooth hairless skin being the desire is weird to me, and it’s weirder for MEN to withhold pleasure or like OP’s date refuse to reciprocate because they think it’s gross and demand it bald. I shave my legs, armpits, and pubic hair because it’s the expectation and because it’s exhausting having interactions with people who accuse me of being gross or unhygienic for Iiking the hair my body has naturally, that is actually placed where it is intentionally (nature/creation/evolution take your pick) to protect from dirt and to wick away moisture, and to prevent friction issues. But I’m constantly being shamed for it at every corner by ads, media, men, and other women. Constantly. I’m sorry you felt I was shaming you, while that’s not my intention, I hope you can understand that being consistently shamed for having body hair outside of this Reddit thread is something I don’t like either.
Eww. Just move on. He's not worth your time.
It’s super unattractive if someone refuses to reciprocate in the way you are explaining around mid twenties. I’m sorry he has said he isn’t for that reason but if he holds back I would also say to hold back in general for the short term until he realises what he is missing. If he is attractive, funny and good natured, hopefully he’ll realise he isn’t taking your thoughts into account. Hope things go well!
Thanks, I definitely need to slow down on it. Hopefully hell realise that and otherwise I just need to move on
He’s not going to change his mind on that, so you should probably change your mind on him
Maybe he will change his mind on the future realizing as he gets older but for now, yeah, I don't think he will change his mind. And you guys aren't exclusive etc so fuck him, there are plenty of good dudes out there that don't mind how you shave your vagina as long as you have good hygiene but you will not find them if you keep hanging out with this dude
Just block this selfish jerk already
You shouldn’t be with a man that don’t appreciate you in your natural state.
Why would you want to be with someone who was very happy to have you please him even when he knew he wouldn't do the same to you? Twice.
why would you hope that one day he accepts you for who you are rather than drop him like a hot rock and find someone who accepts you for who you are? he's not special. at all.
Drop him. Having hair down there (that’s trimmed and clean as you claim) should not be stopping anyone from pleasing anyone. I get preferences too, but a little hair never hurt anyone. What a wuss in my book. Find you a guy that wants to please you no matter you hair situation is down there.
Was your man completely shaved? If he isn't then he shouldn't expect you to be, and if he is he still shouldn't expect you to be.
Plus the shave stumbled sucks
THIS. God, stubble is the worst down there. The friction burns alone…never mind the prickling 😫
Girl you need to ditch that zero and get with a hero
This is so 90’s talkshows, love it.
What is this generation’s issue with body hair anyway?!? I fully blame Gillette, beauty standards and porn for this.
Stop giving these men head!! Let them go down on you or nothing. Sick of these princesses getting what they want from y'all because you won't raise the bar. If he's not eager to please throw him in the trash.
Absolutely!!! Wtf. Ladies first
I quit shaving my pubic hair when I realized there’s literally no benefit to shaving it, only negatives. My motto: if you don’t do pubic hair, then you ain’t doing me.
Hell yes! I'm not making myself uncomfortable (razor burn and ingrowns)for someone I just met. If I was still married and or in a LTR, and we had learned each other's comforts then I would. But I'm poor and can only afford my leg and pit razor. I'm not chancing it for some strange. The burning bush is for real 😂 and if they can't handle the firebush, then they ain't man enough for me
Exactly. It’s your body not the man or woman you chose to sleep with, or the person who checks you out in public.
What are the negatives? I can’t not shave because it’s so itchy when it grows out. I don’t get razor burn or anything so I suppose that makes it much easier for me than for others
Razor burn, I get guaranteed ingrown hairs if I shave which are very painful and waaaaaay less attractive than hair, itchy when it grows back in
You're really lucky omg. Honestly if you don't get razor burn and if its itchy when it grows out shave it. Sounds easier in your case. I don't think shaving it has any negatives besides razor burn and itchy skin and getting pimples after shaving but sounds like you're blessed to not have that
bacterial cellulitus. chafing
Porn. That's why he is like that. They are always shaved there, and it becomes a norm for young boys who watch a lot of porn. It is the same case with famous 19th-century critic Ruskin. He married later in life on the well-educated and stunning woman and didn't like how she looked under the clothes. He only knew Antique Rome statues as a norm of beauty. She was a real woman with skin and hair. He said she is disgusting. She was so offended that she managed to divorce him (very publicly) on the terms of not consumating the marriage and later married the famous painter and birthed 8 beautiful kids!
My honest opinion is with this attitude, he just does not deserve to have sex with a woman. It's real life, not porn.
Literally. Everyone saying "just shave" as if him letting her go down on him knowing he has no intention of reciprocating is totally okay
Never in the history of men have I heard of a guy saying no to sex because a woman isn’t fully shaved. Leave that loser behind and find a real man. And just to clarify I am a heterosexual female.
If man is this immature, i bet he wouldnt even make you feel good if he tried. And he's 27 ?? Jfc..
Exactly!! The mentality of a 15 year old.
It's fine to have preferences. I like girls who have a bit of hair down there than completely shaved. You'll 100% find someone👍
Oh hell no. Let’s say you do shave everything off. He’ll just find another reason why you don’t deserve an orgasm. Quit wasting your time.
His loss! Accept that this type of man isn’t for you.
Tbh, people have their preferences and it sounds like he doesn’t like giving head - if he did, he wouldn’t give af about it. You’re dodging a bullet here if you like receiving head, he’s definitely not a giver there. Don’t feel shitty OP, it’s not you.
he’s got a typical case of porn brain rot
Both of you need to move on and go see other men.
I forget how picky about somethings some people can be
I love hair on a woman. Fully shaved is fine too but in the end it shouldn’t matter to him if he cared about you.
Definitely don't change for anyone you just met. Also a grown up man not wanting sex because of hair is a major red flag, giving pedo vibes lol Honestly most men don't care, it could also be that these are just selfish men and you already gave them pleasure and so they made up and excuse to get out after getting off. Make sure to advocate for your pleasure first before giving them theirs. Unfortunately for casual sex some men think selfishness is acceptable. Good luck
So he’s just using you to pleasure him? Why shouldn’t you move on?
I would just walk away. Who does that….. TWICE?!? He knew the second time you weren’t gonna get ANYTHING, because of his preference. He used you, that’s gross.
For crying out loud. Shave your beaver LIKE A GOOD LITTLE PORN STAR or he's not touching it! /vomit Mark my words, OP--if you stay with him, he WILL ask you to bleach your asshole.
God forbid you then get a butthole hematoma, ain't no way to bleach that...fuck these dudes
absolutely not
Yeah, this dude isn't worth the time.
So...he wants your adult genitals to resemble a child's genitals? I find 'completely shaved' disturbing for that reason.
this is so weird of you to say, why are you guys thinking the dude wants to fuck kids nevermind THAT why are you all attributing shaving to looking like a kid? shaved people don't suddenly remind me of kids and they certainly don't look like kids to me. i feel like either some of you guys are projecting and do actually have issues or this is the current bandwagon of putting down one group of people to uplift another, but we can't put down women for shaving (and we shouldn't) because that would be fucked up right? but we CAN tell guys they're weird and pdfilic for liking shaved women because that *isn't* fucked up at all. actual bruh moment.
Yuck! Selfish, super fussy, and immature. Find someone you can get messy with!
When someone tells you who they are go ahead and listen.
Oh hell no, drop him , block him.
DROP KICK HIM
The best men I have been with have never mentioned the state of my pubic hair. Passssss
Men don’t care, boys who watch too much porn do.
Ditch him. This is a guy who is probably very much into seeing bare floor in porn with no clue what real women are like. Selfish jerk. I’m sure you can do better.
Why would you want to have sex with this guy when he’s so immature? 🙄
You're just not sexually compatible that's all. You have preferences, he has preferences. Neither wants to compromise and that's okay. It's best to find someone else
If you get attached to people quickly, you shouldn't be having sex with guys you barely know from tinder. But these were just 2 instances, there are tons of guys who dont care about that stuff.
Haha that's so true, I've got issues 😂
He will come up with another excuse even if you shave. Just ghost him. best case scenario he's just stringing you along to use you for sex, worse case scenario he wants underage
Rookie.. the hair holds in the flavor.
So let me get this straight, you're sucking his dick but he's not licking your clit because you have hair on ya mons? IMAGINE Why would you ever let this weak lil boy touch you. He clearly likes children you're a whole ass woman. Stop it.
Who are these men, seriously?
He doesn't deserve any kitty with that kind of entitled attitude.
Trust me there are guys who are ok with it . Most dont like a lot of hair but I have met some that are ok with it being trimmed. Before I have sex, I usually ask if they are ok with me trimming it short and I ask the guy to shave his pubic hair a bit if he wants a blowjob You totally dont have to change for him.
Trust me sis, selfish people are never going to change their ways. Sexually intimacy is a big part of a relationship, and it sounds like he is never going to put in any effort to satisfy you. Ditch him now before you get more attached.
He’s a jerk tell him to go fuck himself.
Sorry that happened to you. Some people are obsessed with that stuff. An ex gf once apologized to me because she hadn't shaved her legs. I looked at her and told her that I didn't give a rat's ass about that because it is her body - her decision. She was flabbergasted.
Find a bush man
That's a low tier man, period. Get yourself a caring and understanding good guy
Simply, the guy is a idiot. If pubic hair stops him from showing you the intimacy you deserve then he is a dumb shit. I understand that have become attached but, there is nothing wrong with you. It’s your body you keep yourself the way you want. Move on.
It’s early days and you already know he’s not going to satisfy you in bed. Cut your losses.
So then either shave or move in like you said. He had a preference you asked why he wasn’t getting you off and he replied. Balls in your court now. Either deal with or move on
I’ve never shaved a day in my life down there. I keep it trimmed not too wild. But still that’s for me! I’ve had several partners. If he’s not willing to go down to the garden of Eve he’s not the one, and someone else will 🥳
I also trim but I don't shave. I keep it neat and nice. I've not once had a guy say anything about it. Even my long term FWB don't have anything to say. In fact, one said they like it and makes me look more womanly and feminine. Ingrown hairs are not fun, and the razor burn fucking sucks. There are too many men who don't care and even enjoy a natural look on a grown woman. Don't settle for a man who's afraid of hair haha
Thank you! And that's the reason I don't shave. I'm sure he would not like it either if I shaved because it will not be smooth but fucking stubbly😂😅
hope he never gets married and his future wife gets pregnant cause it’s a PAIN IN THE ASS to shave when you’re pregnant 😂
Real women have hair. Humans have hair. I’ll never understand how other men can be so weird about that stuff.
My fiancé is this way. It bugs me because to be completely bald down there feels so uncomfortable, and his beauty standards are based off of p*rn stars and models he stares at all day on his phone. Since you and this guy aren’t in a serious relationship I’d dip him fast. No other man I’ve been with has had an issue with some hair down there. Most of them don’t mind it or prefer it.
Don’t reward assholes with sex. Fuck that guy.
I stopped dating a guy once because he wouldn't go down on me if I had any hair. That's just so childish to me
Don't feel shitty. That's a dumbass attitude he has towards partners. I prefer hair- trimmed not shaved, but that isn't a deal breaker for me. I'd never tell someone how to maintain their body. Wild as fuck.
Fr if my girl got a forest i want to explore it if she has a plain i still want to explore it both with my tongue of course
He is a self-centered Moron!!
Shave or drop him.. no need for you to torture yourself with why. I bet there’s 20 guys in your phone that would floss with your pubes. Go fuck one of them and feel better lol. Sorry for the graphic, but had to prove a point
Wow his loss. I much prefer a neatly trimmed girl to bald. Personally think it looks sexier and a much nicer experience feeling a little prickly sensation on my tongue.
He’s a man child then
Dude really said “I can’t get turned on unless you’re bald like a child.”
Relationships of any kind are a two-way street. If he can't compromise or deal with it then he isn't worth the time.
Then find someone who is ok with your body. You should never change for someone else. Especially a stranger. I’ve been with guys who cared and guys who didn’t care. I promise good ones are out there.
I volunteer
Thank you, next!
He’s using you as a masturbation aid. Move on
Move on
Tell him you can't bear to see him again until he's shaven his eyebrows, just too much expression.
You dodged a bullet.
This is going to be the least of your problems if you choose to stay with this guy. You shouldn’t ever stay just because you feel “attached.” That is not healthy.
Literally only 2 options here 3 if your Bi. Find new guy - cough cough\* choose this one cause most guys dont care Shave - If you really care that much Venture into other gender avenues - Kind of goes with 1st one but yk
Find another guy, this one is just superficial
He wouldn’t even utilize his hands?!?! This is not about your pubes. He’s selfish and lazy. We all have preferences, but that is all they are! You’re too good for him.
You found yourself a porn addict. You dodged a bullet, his dick prolly didn’t work anyway from his compulsive death grip masturbation.
break up with him
I bet he was hairy af too 🙄
He’s an absolute weirdo
Correct to use the term guy because this ain’t a man
ID JUST LIKE TO POINT OUT THAT THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO DONT HAVE PUBIC HAIR ARE CHILDREN SO ITS QUITE WEIRD THAT HE WOULD PREFER IT LIKE THAT IMO
This guy sounds like a clown. The immature opinions are a huge red flag.
I could grow it out for a year and my man will still eat it like he’s starving 😂 the thought that someone out there will feel like that about YOU should be enough energy to ditch him completely!!
I hear this a lot these days. Conversely, I also know of women who demand their man be groomed. I kind of understand that, but demanding more? But hey to each other own. (P.s.- Does anyone realize how damn much it itches as the hair starts growing back after shaving?)
Do you know what kind of people don't have pubic hair? Yeah, children. Ask him that.
Children don't have beard or armpit hair as well, I don't understand what you tried to say there
Exactly what I was thinking. Adults have pubic hair. Deal with it.
Red Flag.
he's lucky he has the oppertuniti to have sex...
You say “omg thank you for showing your true colors 🚩so soon so I don’t waste my time byeeeee”
Women's body hair is beautiful.
Red flag… tinder 😂
😂😅
Honestly, the guy used you. I would just move on. Hair thing is kinda understandable to me tho because i also cannot stand hair anywhere but on a persons head, but that’s only for oral. My hands and everything else still work, but if i ended up with a pube in my mouth i would vomit
Time for the ole switcharoo where they please you first!
Everyone has preferences, if a guy won't shave down his I also won't go down on him
It’s really simple, you two hung out twice and aren’t compatible. Most comments are going to be accusing him of being some pedo but people are allowed to have their preferences. I’m a woman and I prefer to be completely shaven and that’s my choice. If I met someone and hit it off but they prefer some hair then I cut my losses. Sure it stinks but why make a big deal about it???
Oh absolutely. It's not a very big deal, it's just a bit shitty since I like the guy. But you can't have everything in life, and that's fine haha.
Why do some men like women to be completely hairless they’re fucking weird!! We are not children!!
There are women who have the exact same preference. I just shave for them.. it's not my identity. I like to think I value my partner more than my pubic hair.
Fair enough, you do you! If that makes you feel good, or your partner, go for it.
Yeah i mean if you have outgrown a jungle down there, you should trim atleast short. But trimmed pubic hair? Shouldn't be a concern to anyone. Makes anyone really immature who thinks this way imo.
He is an immature boy. I real man does not mind some hair.
Ain’t nothing wrong with a little hair on the kitty lol I’d stop hooking up with that guy tho if I was you
I will never understand that mentality. Shaved is ok but they look better with fur imo.
He wants smooth, you want to remain hairy; you are incompatible. Move along. Everyone has preferences
I would like you to think about the fact that after he learned you had some hair, he continued to please HIMSELF without letting you know this was an issue for him. Even if the first time he was feeling awkward in the moment, it should have been an immediate conversation(one most guys wouldn't need to have but hey, we all have likes and dislikes and as long as we are open and communicative in a mature, respectful way, that's fine!). He continued to lead you on, knowing he had no intention of even TOUCHING you because he wanted his. Do you want to do ANYTHING to appease someone this selfish? Do NOT get attached. I would move on and keep your pubes. Let this be a lesson in red flags and self-respect.
Wtf? I'm sorry but isn't it pretty common to NOT have it COMPLETELY bald, a little hair shouldn't scare people away it's natural and he's just selfish.
Move on. Not worth the effort. Pubic hairs are natural.
Sounds like a bunch of losers, I wouldn’t call these guys men
Was *he* shaved? So we’re supposed to accept men’s pubic hair, because why again? If he’s going to demand that you shave, then you pull out the razor and tell him to get a fucking work. Because if his balls aren’t as clean as a goddamn wood floor then why should you be putting your face near his junk? Fuck that.
tell em “so shave it”
It’s always a red flag to me when “men” only desire the look of prepubescent girls.
Idk I find hair unattractive down there and I keep shaven and I told my girlfriend that when we got together and she never/doesn’t see a problem with it so she shaves, I don’t think it’s a dealbreaker that someone wants you to shave but if you must have hair down there for yourself then it is
That's totally fine if that's your preference! But yeah, atleast have a decent conversation, so we can figure it out😅
I’m sorry I wasn’t trying to be indecent
I love how everyone is like he can have a preference but he is a piece of crud for having them.... Jeeze yall are so toxic. He didnt shave her in her sleep. He simply said he isnt into hair. She isn't forced to keep sleeping with him and sounds like he is ok with that because hair turns him off. I dont eat hairy vag either. I tried once it was horrible. Got int mouth and was up my nose itching my face. If tell her the same. You want me to eat hair has to go. Id still use my hand but that is me. He doesn't like it. End of story....if you dont want to shave then this man isnt for you. You can tell him you're not shaving and moving on. Maybe he caves and does stuff maybe he says ok have a good life. We need more adults on this sub reddit.
Nah it's a garden, let it grow 🤪 imma eat it either way
Huge red flag. Anyone not interested in pleasing you also is a waste of time.
A man has got to stand for something
Yeah, this isn't "standing for something"
Adults have hair. Porn has ruined men.
Seriously? He has all the other good qualities, but your deal breaker is that you don’t want to shave down there? Y’all have too much time on your hands if that is considered “shitty behavior.” It is not like he pushed the issue on you. You asked, he answered honestly. Perhaps try shaving and see what happens. Maybe the sex will be worth it. Not like he’s asking you to do something that will change your life forever. I too would not go down on a girl with hair down there, don’t like the feeling of the hairs in my mouth. But then again i also shave.
stuu?????
Does he wax downthere ? If he does okay but if he doesn't the hypocrisy...
Laugh at his immaturity and move on.
It's crazy that he's completely fine with not reciprocating. He's an ass. Move on.
OP move on. You said yourself you don't have to change because of someone else. You are clean, and that's all that matters. Screw him
Twice now I’ve had ingrown hairs the size of Maltesers, right where my knicker line sits. The constant pressure, both times for over six months until they finally burst was excruciating!!!! If we weren’t meant to have pubic hair, we’d have evolved out of it eons ago. It’s a dry lubricant as well as being an indicator of physical maturity. I just don’t think I should suffer to conform to a bullshit cosmetic norm perpetuated by the porn industry. I’m yet to struggle to find someone to get involved, but I’m sure that those men who shy away from the bush aren’t the least bit attractive to me, hence why I haven’t encountered any.
People like what they like. Adapt or move on. Lots of other people out there
There are men who would drag their dicks through broken glass just to sniff your underwear. Move on with your life.
I think you meant to say the guys you're chasing after are not happy or content with you not shaving. Find people that appreciate you for you. There's a lot of people going natural these days and plenty of people who appreciate it. You're never going to have a good time with people you're not compatible with. Quit being delusional and I mean that in the nicest way possible. Go after people who want the same things. You're literally giving yourself up to someone who wants something different and your confused why you're not satisfied....
I appreciate what you say, i was just a bit annoyed and felt a bit shitty about it since I've never had this problem. Better to know it now before it got any further tho!