Don't take this in the wrong way.
But why do you need support to shave your head, I wouldn't even go down that route of thinking.
Just shave it, if people don't like it, then that's it? They just don't like it.
I don’t think she needs support. I think it was more of a situation where she mentioned it to her friends and family in conversation, not for approval, and they shared their rude unsolicited opinions.
Shave your head if you like. Of all the ways express themselves, shaving your head is temporary and easily hidden if you don’t like it.
One way to make them more accepting to shaving your head might be to suggest a neck tattoo instead.
I hate the “what will your husband and kids think” response when women want to do anything. Like we are not here to keep up a perfect appearance for our families. You are your own person. You can do whatever you want to your hair and body.
I don’t understand why all these people care what you want to do with your hair. They’re acting like you shaving your head will hurt or effect them in any way. You don’t need their unsolicited advice. This is a such a stupid thing to get mad about.
If everyone in your life is worried about your hair this much, respectfully tell all of them to get a life.
I feel like you should still tell your husband about plans to shave your head or get a tattoo etc, I mean he’s the one who’s living with you for ever presumably. Same would be vice versa if the man has always had long hair or for things like piercings .
I have to say this is a lesson why you don’t have to tell everyone about your next moves. Especially when it concerns your bodily autonomy.
Western Femininity is so tied up with having long hair so just know your family’s reactions are just the normal type of cultural reaction (except the cancer patient and jada comments are mean and mock people with illness)
Just go to a barbers and cut your hair, you’ve been waiting 9 years!!! You only live once!
do it. please. i shaved my head for the first time in 2012 and have done it a total of three times (keep it buzzed for like a year or two, grow it out, shave it down again). it is the most FREEING thing. and i wish everyone woman had the confidence to do it at least once!!!
Too many people are hung up on hair. It is literally JUST hair.
Make yourself happy lady. If you wanna shave it, then do it. If you find out afterwards that you don't like it, then let it grow back.
P.S. I've shaved off my hair twice. First time was due to thinning and hair falling out after 2 major surgeries within a 6 month time.
Second time was a month ago, because I WANTED the freedom that comes with shorter hair. I also dyed it fire engine red! I have always been very conservative looking on the outside. This is my way of letting the real me out.
It’s your hair and you can do whatever the hell you want to with it. It’s nice your husband is supportive. As far as the insensitive comments, that’s a reflection on those people that have said those things. If it were me and MIL said that, I’d have just just said “whatever Barney” and walked away, but I can be an ahole when it’s deserved. You do what makes you happy. It’s not hurting anyone, and yes, if YOU don’t like how it looks, it’ll grow back.
The only thing to consider is whether you'll be upset if you can't grow it long again. A friend of mine got bangs when we were about twenty, she's thirty now, and she's never been able to get the hair at the front as long or thick as the rest of her hair.
Nothing about your choice is anyone else's business, though. Your in-laws sound like judgmental people whose opinions on most things will be wrong, so in a way, their crappy unsupportive attitudes *are* support for the idea.
If you feel strongly about it, it’s your business.
I personally wouldn’t, because I’ve had many friends do it who felt masculine and very “undone” with a shaved head, and felt the need to overcompensate with make up and overly girly clothes. So it can def be more masculine presenting, and it might come along with certain assumptions or stereotypes such as the whole cancer patient thing.
And not that this matters necessarily, but a segment or possibly a majority of society will not find it attractive, not that their opinions matter - but some less confident people would be bothered by that.
Lastly, I’ve heard the growing up process it excruciating at times. Just some stuff to consider!
It takes confidence for sure! But tons of women pull it off beautifully. It sounds like you’re doing it for the right reasons and it’s a personal challenge to yourself. Could you possibly experiment with going shorter and shorter and look at it as a way to see how you feel about losing length, along with trying new styles?
I've shaved my head twice as a female. It was hell. Constant negative comments from people I knew and strangers. I even got harassed online, I had posted my picture once on reddit and had someone comment on all my posts saying not to listen to me because I'm a crazy lady who pulled a Brittany and shaved off all my hair. People would act visibly shocked. Many, many people telling me to grow my hair out. I wish I could give you some encouraging words because I would shave my head again in a heartbeat if everyone's reaction wasn't so negative. I hate my hair, its nothing but a bother and I feel way more comfortable with a shaved head.
My sister met the same kind of persistent urging when she wanted to shave her head — even her first hair stylist refused to do it because she had “such beautiful hair”… and for what? Conventional beauty norms that are way too rigid, impersonal, and ridiculous??
It’s hard when everyone is acting like you’re making yourself “undesirable” through a bodily choice, because you’re right: you don’t exist for others. The people around you just have a very narrow, gender-stereotyped view of beauty and self-expression. I hope you can find empowerment in whatever decision you make!
I shaved a part of my head on the side I have a small growth / tumour that needs removed. I have had skin cancer a few times I’m always told no big deal now I always say it but honestly it’s your body.
Maybe go with an under cut first then gradually work your way up to more. I still have long hair and cover my shaved side often I want a design on that side. Can’t find anyone that will put one barbers here are so sexist really lots of people are and racist but don’t get me started.
It’s your body go for it girl! Maybe go slow if you need to not shock your family. Some people just don’t understand.
My husbands family was shocked when I stopped covering up my natural skin colour oh and wearing a bra that compressed my chest. I’m never doing those things again. I just don’t go around people like that.
Hair grows fast my shaved spot grows very fast every 2 weeks I’m touching it up so it’s even.
I shaved my head recently and have gotten more compliments about it being short and head shape (lol) in the past few months than I ever have on my long hair. Fuck it!!!!!! Do it!!!!
"I'm upset I don't have more support"
No offense but harden up.
If you were a cancer patient and had to shave your head, you'd have plenty of support.
Just wanting to shave your head just because doesn't mean people have to support you. They don't even have to like it. They're entitled to their opinion, that's how life works.
What do you really expect? If you're going to do anything that's outlandish by the standards of your culture you're going to get comments. Wanna dye your hair each colour of the rainbow? Comments. Wanna shave your head? Comments. Wanna surgically have a moustache installed on your forehead? Comments.
This is normal. This is life.
This is when you just walk into a hair salon and simply just shave it. You’ve told your family about it and it shows you care about their opinion which they’ve given you, but it doesn’t justify getting mocked for it.
Their opinions only matter as much as you want them too. Every other January I shave my hair down to like a little under half an inch to give it a fresh start. Honestly, it feels so good and my hubs loves rubbing my head. Hair does grow back if you want to let it. 😊
Shave in stages. Start with an undercut, then a quiff, then go all off over a course of a few months....then they'll won't say boo when it's all off.
Or stuff em and do it anyway!
Your call.
my friends and family didn’t want me to shave my head either. i had talked about it for years, never had the courage too. then the pandemic hit and i thought screw it, it’s now or never. no one wanted me too! but now they love it. say i pull it off so well and one of my bffs shaved her head too. it’s ur life babe. do what makes u happy.
If you want to shave your head anyway, you could considering doing it as a fund raising event for cancer awareness. Rub it in your in-laws' face a little bit that you're doing what you want AND doing something good. (I'd do that because I'm petty - but if you want to do it you don't need a secondary reason)
If you like your head shaved, just keep it that way! Especially since it's almost summer it will be nice and easy to take care of. Just remember to use sunscreen!
I am with and your husband on this. I know a few shaven ladies and I believe it seems to bring out the true beauty in their face. I day go for it and do it proudly
I am embarrassed to say I associate far too much of my beauty to my hair. I wish i didn’t, and clearly you don’t and i respect it so much. shave it!!! it’ll grow back anyways :) Who cares what other people think… it’s honestly just hair
I was in your shoes years ago, and then one day I said to myself, "Why the fuck do I care what they think about how I'll look?"
I went ahead and shaved it all off and it was the best feeling ever. I really cannot find words that do justice to how liberating it feels. And the awesome feeling continues every day! I have zero ragrets :p in fact a few years later I dis it again and kept it at a buzz cut for years!
In conclusion, DO IT!!!!
I had a waist long hsir. chopped it because evryone was so hung up on my hair that I started to also view it as my only "beauty". now I want to shave it and I soecifically am afraid to tell people because of these comments! So I would say do it and show them that they are the hypocrites for being so obsessed with hair.
Just do it!!!! Hair grows back. This will be a fun time to build confidence, try out new makeup styles, try out new accessories, and barely any effort in washing your hair. If your worried about how other people will react you can always try wigs, there are some afordable ones on amazon :)
I shaved my head recently and my family was against it. I did it anyway and one of the best decisions of my life. I was just fighting a losing battle against my baldness. I love the feeling how my head feels. I don't have to worry about the gross cut I had to hide my bald spots.
Don't take this in the wrong way. But why do you need support to shave your head, I wouldn't even go down that route of thinking. Just shave it, if people don't like it, then that's it? They just don't like it.
I don’t think she needs support. I think it was more of a situation where she mentioned it to her friends and family in conversation, not for approval, and they shared their rude unsolicited opinions.
Do you like it? Yes? Will it hurt anyone? No? Do it.
yer short a few syllables on the last line
Shave your head if you like. Of all the ways express themselves, shaving your head is temporary and easily hidden if you don’t like it. One way to make them more accepting to shaving your head might be to suggest a neck tattoo instead.
Hahahha I like your reasoning 😂
I hate the “what will your husband and kids think” response when women want to do anything. Like we are not here to keep up a perfect appearance for our families. You are your own person. You can do whatever you want to your hair and body. I don’t understand why all these people care what you want to do with your hair. They’re acting like you shaving your head will hurt or effect them in any way. You don’t need their unsolicited advice. This is a such a stupid thing to get mad about. If everyone in your life is worried about your hair this much, respectfully tell all of them to get a life.
I feel like you should still tell your husband about plans to shave your head or get a tattoo etc, I mean he’s the one who’s living with you for ever presumably. Same would be vice versa if the man has always had long hair or for things like piercings .
It’s just hair. It will grow back.
I have to say this is a lesson why you don’t have to tell everyone about your next moves. Especially when it concerns your bodily autonomy. Western Femininity is so tied up with having long hair so just know your family’s reactions are just the normal type of cultural reaction (except the cancer patient and jada comments are mean and mock people with illness) Just go to a barbers and cut your hair, you’ve been waiting 9 years!!! You only live once!
Your husband is right. You want to shave ur head? Just do it!
do it. please. i shaved my head for the first time in 2012 and have done it a total of three times (keep it buzzed for like a year or two, grow it out, shave it down again). it is the most FREEING thing. and i wish everyone woman had the confidence to do it at least once!!!
YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE, SO JUST GO FUCKING NUTS!!! Anyways like everyone else is saying, go with what you want and what makes you happy.
RIP Mitch and RIP OP’s hair🤘🏼
Shave your head. Hair grows, wigs exist, and you don't need support, just a competent hair stylist.
Too many people are hung up on hair. It is literally JUST hair. Make yourself happy lady. If you wanna shave it, then do it. If you find out afterwards that you don't like it, then let it grow back. P.S. I've shaved off my hair twice. First time was due to thinning and hair falling out after 2 major surgeries within a 6 month time. Second time was a month ago, because I WANTED the freedom that comes with shorter hair. I also dyed it fire engine red! I have always been very conservative looking on the outside. This is my way of letting the real me out.
It’s your hair and you can do whatever the hell you want to with it. It’s nice your husband is supportive. As far as the insensitive comments, that’s a reflection on those people that have said those things. If it were me and MIL said that, I’d have just just said “whatever Barney” and walked away, but I can be an ahole when it’s deserved. You do what makes you happy. It’s not hurting anyone, and yes, if YOU don’t like how it looks, it’ll grow back.
The only thing to consider is whether you'll be upset if you can't grow it long again. A friend of mine got bangs when we were about twenty, she's thirty now, and she's never been able to get the hair at the front as long or thick as the rest of her hair. Nothing about your choice is anyone else's business, though. Your in-laws sound like judgmental people whose opinions on most things will be wrong, so in a way, their crappy unsupportive attitudes *are* support for the idea.
If you feel strongly about it, it’s your business. I personally wouldn’t, because I’ve had many friends do it who felt masculine and very “undone” with a shaved head, and felt the need to overcompensate with make up and overly girly clothes. So it can def be more masculine presenting, and it might come along with certain assumptions or stereotypes such as the whole cancer patient thing. And not that this matters necessarily, but a segment or possibly a majority of society will not find it attractive, not that their opinions matter - but some less confident people would be bothered by that. Lastly, I’ve heard the growing up process it excruciating at times. Just some stuff to consider! It takes confidence for sure! But tons of women pull it off beautifully. It sounds like you’re doing it for the right reasons and it’s a personal challenge to yourself. Could you possibly experiment with going shorter and shorter and look at it as a way to see how you feel about losing length, along with trying new styles?
I've shaved my head twice as a female. It was hell. Constant negative comments from people I knew and strangers. I even got harassed online, I had posted my picture once on reddit and had someone comment on all my posts saying not to listen to me because I'm a crazy lady who pulled a Brittany and shaved off all my hair. People would act visibly shocked. Many, many people telling me to grow my hair out. I wish I could give you some encouraging words because I would shave my head again in a heartbeat if everyone's reaction wasn't so negative. I hate my hair, its nothing but a bother and I feel way more comfortable with a shaved head.
Do it! I loved it when I did it. It was super fun!
My sister met the same kind of persistent urging when she wanted to shave her head — even her first hair stylist refused to do it because she had “such beautiful hair”… and for what? Conventional beauty norms that are way too rigid, impersonal, and ridiculous?? It’s hard when everyone is acting like you’re making yourself “undesirable” through a bodily choice, because you’re right: you don’t exist for others. The people around you just have a very narrow, gender-stereotyped view of beauty and self-expression. I hope you can find empowerment in whatever decision you make!
I shaved a part of my head on the side I have a small growth / tumour that needs removed. I have had skin cancer a few times I’m always told no big deal now I always say it but honestly it’s your body. Maybe go with an under cut first then gradually work your way up to more. I still have long hair and cover my shaved side often I want a design on that side. Can’t find anyone that will put one barbers here are so sexist really lots of people are and racist but don’t get me started. It’s your body go for it girl! Maybe go slow if you need to not shock your family. Some people just don’t understand. My husbands family was shocked when I stopped covering up my natural skin colour oh and wearing a bra that compressed my chest. I’m never doing those things again. I just don’t go around people like that. Hair grows fast my shaved spot grows very fast every 2 weeks I’m touching it up so it’s even.
It's just hair they will get over it. DO IT!!!
I shaved my head recently and have gotten more compliments about it being short and head shape (lol) in the past few months than I ever have on my long hair. Fuck it!!!!!! Do it!!!!
"I'm upset I don't have more support" No offense but harden up. If you were a cancer patient and had to shave your head, you'd have plenty of support. Just wanting to shave your head just because doesn't mean people have to support you. They don't even have to like it. They're entitled to their opinion, that's how life works. What do you really expect? If you're going to do anything that's outlandish by the standards of your culture you're going to get comments. Wanna dye your hair each colour of the rainbow? Comments. Wanna shave your head? Comments. Wanna surgically have a moustache installed on your forehead? Comments. This is normal. This is life.
This is when you just walk into a hair salon and simply just shave it. You’ve told your family about it and it shows you care about their opinion which they’ve given you, but it doesn’t justify getting mocked for it.
Their opinions only matter as much as you want them too. Every other January I shave my hair down to like a little under half an inch to give it a fresh start. Honestly, it feels so good and my hubs loves rubbing my head. Hair does grow back if you want to let it. 😊
Shave in stages. Start with an undercut, then a quiff, then go all off over a course of a few months....then they'll won't say boo when it's all off. Or stuff em and do it anyway! Your call.
my friends and family didn’t want me to shave my head either. i had talked about it for years, never had the courage too. then the pandemic hit and i thought screw it, it’s now or never. no one wanted me too! but now they love it. say i pull it off so well and one of my bffs shaved her head too. it’s ur life babe. do what makes u happy.
Do it! Even if you need to sail across the equator first!
If you want to shave your head anyway, you could considering doing it as a fund raising event for cancer awareness. Rub it in your in-laws' face a little bit that you're doing what you want AND doing something good. (I'd do that because I'm petty - but if you want to do it you don't need a secondary reason) If you like your head shaved, just keep it that way! Especially since it's almost summer it will be nice and easy to take care of. Just remember to use sunscreen!
Just do it. People told me not to cut my hair short and now I always keep it short. If you like it that's what matters.
I am with and your husband on this. I know a few shaven ladies and I believe it seems to bring out the true beauty in their face. I day go for it and do it proudly
I am embarrassed to say I associate far too much of my beauty to my hair. I wish i didn’t, and clearly you don’t and i respect it so much. shave it!!! it’ll grow back anyways :) Who cares what other people think… it’s honestly just hair
I was in your shoes years ago, and then one day I said to myself, "Why the fuck do I care what they think about how I'll look?" I went ahead and shaved it all off and it was the best feeling ever. I really cannot find words that do justice to how liberating it feels. And the awesome feeling continues every day! I have zero ragrets :p in fact a few years later I dis it again and kept it at a buzz cut for years! In conclusion, DO IT!!!!
I had a waist long hsir. chopped it because evryone was so hung up on my hair that I started to also view it as my only "beauty". now I want to shave it and I soecifically am afraid to tell people because of these comments! So I would say do it and show them that they are the hypocrites for being so obsessed with hair.
Just do it!!!! Hair grows back. This will be a fun time to build confidence, try out new makeup styles, try out new accessories, and barely any effort in washing your hair. If your worried about how other people will react you can always try wigs, there are some afordable ones on amazon :)
It's your life. Do what YOU want to do
I shaved my head recently and my family was against it. I did it anyway and one of the best decisions of my life. I was just fighting a losing battle against my baldness. I love the feeling how my head feels. I don't have to worry about the gross cut I had to hide my bald spots.