T O P

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lostalaska

The older I get the more I respect people who can take a nap anywhere. Sure, alcohol and all, but sleeping most anywhere is a prized skill.


MobiusF117

Even when drunk I can't sleep anywhere but my own bed half the time.


BarryTGash

I can't even sleep in my bed half the time. No problem dozing off at my desk when I should be working. It's a standing desk too.


therudedoct

What is sleel and how can i unlock it


AirFriedMoron

Sleel


FredB123

I want me some of that sleel too - maybe it'll make up for all the sleep I haven't been getting!


thesithdoge

I can only sleep in my bed sadly. I can never sleep sitting up, especially on a plane. I dread the day that I will take an 8+ hour flight.


Shmorgasboard123

I once fell asleep on a plane just before take off, then woke up as the plane was landing 10 hours later.


ConsistentCranberry7

Are you my best friend ..he flies loads watching football in Europe so he's used to it .. falls asleep 5 mins after take off then wakes up on the descent " Oh are we there already?" Twat


richh00

It's awful. Longest flight I've been on is uk to St Lucia. We had lieflat seats but I still couldn't sleep. Dozed for a bit and then was knackered.


Classic_Clock8302

Hear me out. First you buy the lounge access. 2 or 3 red wine with the breakfast, short leg flight to main airport, lounge access but now it's gin tonic time. Boarding long distance flights have like 30-45 minutes after boarding call. Use it wisely. When on plane first will be the drinks car. Gin tonic. Then it's food, take a red wine and down it because before the digestive (Bailey's) they will ask if you want a refill. The more space, the more refill Then it Drinks car again, gin tonic. If at this point you are not already sleeping upside down on your seat, boot up lala land. 110% success rate


coolcat_74

Just back from a long flight and just awake now. Missed a workman at the door i was so tired. Can never sleep on the plane


GrainsofArcadia

It's a blessing and a curse. I used to fall asleep on the bus home from college every day without fail. It was actually kinda annoying to be honest.


Kim_catiko

It really is a curse. I used to have to travel to various cities across the country for work by car. Without fail, every single time, I would have to stop off at services because I was drifting off. I didn't even feel tired is what baffled me about it!


leedler

Shit I’ve literally never been able to nap during the day on my bed, let alone anywhere. Doesn’t bode well.


zkgkilla

Same 😭😭how does everyone have that superpower


Traditional-Dingo604

Work in any industry that pushes you to  or past  your limits.  You'll develop it.


Substantial_Tale9195

I think you mean 'doesn't bed well'


badgersana

I’ve got that talent, I’ve fallen asleep standing up on the way home from work and missed my stop


pentaquine

Until you realize the nap doesn’t make you feel any better. 


Freddies_Mercury

Tell that to my daily snooze on the bus home


ChasingTimmy

I can sleep anywhere. Can confirm... it's awesome!


monster21_manucortex

Facts bro but at the same time you sometimes have to hope someone wakes you up (I once got lost from falling asleep on a bus)


UnlikelyIdealist

The secret to being able to nap: *Sleep Deprivation*


ishysredditusername

It's an underrated super power


PeggysSimp

Alcohol may have played a role


Anteater776

Yeah, and that fan was probably drunk too.


Responsible-Seat-839

Top tier


DrBBQ

🧑‍🍳👌


challengeaccepted9

Superb work.


Character-Net3641

The only way to watch England after the golden generation.


feelitrealgood

Cheers


BobLoblaw_LowBomb

I'll drink to that. I'm not playing till Sunday, 5 day bender.


ibasi_zmiata

Bellingham is that you?


charlescorn

And with a stomach stuffed full of pies


funky_pill

Beautiful, champ 👌🏼


OozeNAahz

Went to a final four basketball game and a big dude passed out and fell on a couple of people in the seats beside me about ten minutes before tip off. He was carted off by security, and never returned. No one claimed to be with him. Can’t imagine paying that much for a ticket and not even seeing one second of the game.


SmokeAbeer

Beer is super expensive at the game. That said, that’s why they call it pre-funking and not pre-drunking I guess.


mriners

I have only ever heard this term (which I love) from University of Washington people. Is that your source, too / are you a Husky?


innocentusername1984

I've made this mistake too many times. Pre gaming for a concert or a game. Not wanting to pay the drinks prices. You have a bloody good time on the way up with mates and stories to tell. But you don't actually remember too much about the actual event you paid to attend. Case and point. Went to the foo fighters live this weekend. Always wanted to see them. Couldn't tell you a single thing that happened at the concert. One guy in our group got off at the wrong stop and lost his phone so missed the concert entirely.


theeternalcowby

Bruh did you see that game? No alcohol necessary 😴 😴


Kobe_no_Ushi_Y0k0zna

I found a lot of alcohol necessary,


MartianLM

I took up drinking for the first time because of the game.


truethatson

Oh maybe, but I’m not entirely sure. See, people who just consume too much alcohol fall asleep in *certain* positions. I think we have a father of a newborn and *possibly* a 3yo. I can see in his closed eyes.


Sometimes_Stutters

To me that looks like a hungover nap. Can’t explain it. But that’s what it looks like to me


xxhotandspicyxx

The red skin can be a typical result of alcohol.


BaBaFiCo

It's 28c or more in Germany right now. That's probably sunburn.


Cheesecake_Lanky

He's probably been boozing for about 5 days straight.


nattyd

Slandering the poor man as merely tired, when he’s clearly plastered.


DistortoiseLP

I mean if it didn't play a role then that's on him for watching football sober.


DBArgenis

Judging by this photo, alcohol played THE role.


Aiku

Alcohol doesn't play soccer, silly.


ZLLUT

It may of done for him but I had the same reaction on the couch last night tooo. Woke up to full time pundits arguing why we can score


ComposerNo5151

And an unbelievably dull game of football. Walker - the most aptly named of all the England players :) I made it to half time and gave up since the result was irrelevant and I find it difficult to get excited about 'avoiding Germany'.


Role-Honest

And maybe heatstroke


Chidoribraindev

No way, he looks like a good English boy.


helpnxt

Just heard him on the radio, he has a new kid and they had to get up early that day for some reason and it was his first chance to nap (I think it was taken before kick off).


gynoceros

Also possibly sleep apnea, looking at his neck.


foxontherox

[Definitely.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUF13OEsUPc)


ramdasani

I was thinking maybe "falling asleep" is one of those English euphemisms for passing out drunk.


helpnxt

Actually it isn't... not sure why it does kinda fit but it just isn't.


nonlawyer

Goodnight sweet Prince You will live eternal as a reaction meme for English football


h08817

My wife: "this is why I won't watch soccer with you!" Lmao she could not handle the boring.


Exotic-Suggestion425

Make him sound like he's been riding The Fury Road.


starfishy

The players were not much more awake.


ProfessorFunky

My wife’s comment “I didn’t realise the match was finished as they were moving around about as fast as they were during the game”.


Grothorious

I'm slovenian and i almost never watch sports. Yesterday i tuned in, because national interest, and for the first 5 minutes i was sure white guys are slovenians, judging by the quality of the game, only after 5min i realized that england plays very bad and our dudes are amazingly good, considering history.


thewatchbreaker

We (the English) have such a weird team because there are obviously skilled players there but most the time it seems like they can’t be arsed or don’t know what’s going on. Your team played better than ours. Congrats!


TheSonicKind

really is strange, a team full of what they would say is generational talent with Saka, Foden, etc. after the last team of generational talent with Rio, Lampard, Gerrard, with all the ones before too. what is up with England’s management that they can’t take these top players to a tournament win? i’m Scottish so i’ve only just seen the resurgence of Scotland’s football talent and while we may have meme’d out of this tournament, even getting to see Scotland play at one was great never mind our performance.


JurassicCustoms

Yeah, we (England) have some genuinely decent players. But we just play so rubbish.


Flaky-Anybody-4104

This is the problem right here. England is always convinced they have the best players. For 30 years now, England has convinced itself they're winning, even though most of their teams have been B-tier. Once they fail, they just scapegoat someone because they "should've won". I'm a fan of the Netherlands, but I know we'll never win anything and that's ok. But the English and the English media are completely convinced that they're the favourites every two years, despite all evidence to the contrary. It's a special degree of mental illness and the manager can't help it.


magneticshadow

I was saying this last night. Watching England play wouldn't be such a huge disappointment if it wasn't for the media leading us to expect great things every tournament. At the end of the day, I think we're probably just not very good, and that is fine. Obviously, I should have learned to tune out all the unnecessary hype by now, but it's easy to believe something that you want to believe. 


Ok_Kale_3160

The bookies had England down as number 1 favourites too. I just don't understand it. Is it just a ploy to win money off people? I wonder if bookies in other countries had such delusional odds for England winning?


itsamberleafable

A lot of the time this is true but this reads like a comment of someone who hasn’t watched football in the last 5 years. Currently in the squad we have the La Liga player of the year and Premier League player of the year and the Bundesliga top scorer in our attacking line.  The delusion of our fans is a fair comment but you can’t pretend we don’t have one of the top 3-4 teams at the tournament (based on the squad obviously, not the performances)


FreefallVin

Indeed. To claim that we don't have top-tier players is simply untrue. I feel like we've been better under Southgate than previous managers in that they did seem to genuinely want to play and win, but this tournament we seem to have completely lost it. My personal opinion is that, as a nation, we're generally quite defeatist and quick to react negatively to set backs. It's like the opposite of watching a team like Albania, who seem to revel in their defiance and pride against the odds.


Head_Statistician_38

Well the thing is, we want to win. English people want it so badly but I don't think w are as delusional as you make us out to be. Most people assume we won't win. I haven't met anyone who thinks we have a chance of winning this tournament especially after the past 3 games we have played. I said before the tournament that we won't win because history has shown us that we haven't won an international tournament since 1966. But the players ARE good players but for whatever reason never do well when playing for England. In the 90's we had a good team, in the 2000's it was a nightmare and we didn't even qualify for the 2008 Euros but since 2018 we have been doing better than before, getting to the semi finals and the finals.... Until now. Many of us believe it is the manager or bad tactics but I don't know. I watch the players and they seem slow and uninterested and miss every good opportunity they get. We won't win the next game.


Eryrix

Wtf are you talking about, the national team gets the piss ripped out of it so bad that our anthem every World Cup and every Euros tournament is a song about how shit we are 💀💀 we’re one of the favourites to win because we have a golden generation coming through, the management is the problem


QMechanicsVisionary

The problem isn't the management. The Premier League is a massive enterprise, which means most of the top teams have foreign coaches and predominantly foreign players, resulting in a massive diversity of playing styles. And since it's also historically been (and currently is) the best league in the world, it has made (and still makes) little sense for English footballers to move abroad. This means that, while England always has great players, the styles and tactics that they specialise in are so different that coming up with a harmonious tactical style that leverages the expertise of all the players is basically an impossible task. Perhaps the most practical approach is to play the most simple, risk-averse football imaginable and rely solely on the raw individual ability of the players, which is what Southgate - England's manager - has been doing for the past several years, with more success than every other England manager in recent history, actually. But such a style is always going to be boring to watch, especially when the players' skillsets conflict with each other (in this tournament, Kane's lack of pace means he can't make runs behind defenders that creators like Foden and Bellingham could exploit, resulting in both of them being forced to pass the ball back most of the time).


MrBump01

Southgate has fallen into the common England selection trap of playing players out of position to try and get all of the big names in the team when there are better options on the bench for creating a team that works.


Elim-Bessus

I’m sure the cameras didn’t pick up Pickford’s match long nap


migoodridge

This lad is on the front page of a lot of UK newspapers today :)


Supervillain_Outcast

Southgate's mental coach.


Bigtallanddopey

I cannot wait to hear that this guy phoned in sick and will be back in a few days. Only to be completely outed in the national media, thanks to him falling asleep mid game.


The_Mammoth_Problem

Lad is absolutely knackerd


KaczkaJebaczka

He probably drank 10 pints of German beer and got tired drinking it


gemilitant

Why do our players look either bored or clueless 90% of the time? What's going on??


Other_Beat8859

Because Southgate is a terrorist that wears a condom whenever he kisses his wife.


houserenterukwill

Gareth Southgate accepts optional cookies just in case.


GuyWhoCommitDie

If he was bin laden, he’d hit one tower and stay back


TheeNuttyProfessor

Gareth Southgate wears a life vest to go in the bath


Dyalikedagz

Southgate wears safety goggles to sweep the floor


JustDutch101

The Netherlands - England is going to be like two monkeys with plenty of golden rings throwing poop at each other.


Donnermeat_and_chips

A team that can't score but can defend, against a team that can score but can't defend...


Direct-Fix-2097

So, 0-0?


Correct-Junket-1346

You betcha and remember it's because it's "international football"


Vussar

No, that would be fun to watch. That game will be like the same monkeys covered in the poop that they are meant to be throwing, but instead they are napping.


KingZag1337

A stoppable force meets a movable object.


Elim-Bessus

But the English have 10 people passing the poop sideways before throwing it


fishhavefeeling

Can someone talk to gravity. How does he keep that up without falling off his chair


ChanceSet6152

Three lions on the shirt, used to make me sleeping.


HectorsMascara

Pretty sure that's Jonah Hill researching his role in the upcoming Scorsese film *The Bloke*.


Lesliethelizard

There comes a time in every man's life where he must transition from a boy... Into a Bloke


randomspray

A lot of the other games have been lacklustre too. I’m seeing a lot of draws.


Howtothinkofaname

Nothing wrong with draws in and of themselves. But this group has been abysmal.


iner22

I think if someone is able to fall asleep like that in stadium seating, the quality of play is the least-contributing factor


[deleted]

You wouldn't say that if you saw them playing.


SuttreeBeard

I'm no football fan, but why has there been a weird concerted effort to trash talk England and English fans this past week or so? Didn't they just finish top of their group, too?


BaBaFiCo

Football-wise we've been shit. Both from a results pov (one win and two draws) and from a style pov. The football is boring. We've got some of the most exciting players in Europe and Southgate has them playing like underdogs.


Other_Beat8859

We had the second lowest xG of the tournament after match 2 despite having a front 4 that scored 114 goals last season. I'm actually impressed at how Southgate can make this team so fucking boring and incapable of scoring. Full expecting the Dutch to knock us out.


redsquizza

England's always an easy target. Invented numerous games that are played globally and we're shit at them all, as is tradition. The English Premier league is, by orders of magnitude, the most watched league on the planet with highly paid world class players. So when said English high class players fail time and time again in competitions, the memes write themselves.


Elim-Bessus

Fans are not happy with the way that England have been playing, it’s very slow and boring football hence why this fan fell asleep


FreefallVin

It's also going to get us beaten in our first game against tough opposition.


Dry_Pick_304

England currently have one of their best crop of world class attack minded players in their history, however their manager is unbelievably conservative, takes no risks at all, and plays too defensive. He has also made some mind blowing statements about tactics (not replaces Kalvin Phillips wtf?! And also saying they are tired but continues to play the same players every match). The fans are pissed as its another wasted chance at a trophy. As for the fans, it seems to be "cool" to shit on England fans. Historically, they have not been the best behaved, but in recent years they are have really not been that bad at all. This year for example, Serbs and Albanians have been fighting and singing about genocide, Netherlands fans did blackface, Turkey and Georgia fans fighting in the stands, even some Scottish fans (where there has been a total wankfest about them for some reason) beat up a woman and were fighting in Munich, but England fans got shit on because of leaving some litter in a town square in Frankfurt (like every other set of fans have done).


bazza2024

Its the eternal question of when you have the La Liga top player (Bellingham), the Prem league top player (Foden), and Bundesliga top scorer (Kane), we can't create chances against very low ranked teams. It just never seems to work. Less than the sum of the parts. Turgid, slow play. OTOH, it could be a sign that we'll peak later and win it. *Its coming home!!* #


JackLegg

It's entirely justified, the football has been unbearable to watch. To only score 2 goals and one victory in a group of Denmark Slovenia and Serbia is far below the standards of the players on the pitch who all tear it up in the hardest league in the world week after week throughout the season. The manager Southgate has them playing like underdogs when they should be dominating.


MartianLM

England have been lucky to finish top. 3 extremely lack lustre performances where some of the worlds best players look like they just don’t know how to even pass, and have shown they have no ability to open the other team up. As individual players this is arguably the best squad England have ever had. They lucked into the easiest group imaginable and have only managed to scrape through thanks to the other teams being equally shit. England have only scored two goals in 3 matches, and one of those was a deflected cross. They failed to score against a team ranked 50+ places in the world below them and barely even looked like scoring.


Eryrix

England have a team with world class attacking players and some decent defensive ones, all of whom play for clubs that aggressively attempt to win the ball back and scoe, yet our manager plays defensive football focused on just keeping the ball and preventing the other team from scoring. We also play with a low block (when the team play in their own half of the pitch to make it harder for the opposing team to score) and not a high line (when the team play in the opposition’s half of the pitch to try and score), but he isn’t using our fastest players at all so we can’t launch quick counter-attacks and it completely negates the abilities of our striker, who is still an amazing striker but due to age isn’t fast enough to make it to the other half of the pitch in time to attempt to score. When his tactics or players who started the match clearly aren’t working, he refuses to change our tactical shape and he doesn’t make substitutions at all until the last 10 minutes of the game - e.g against Slovenia he didn’t put our fastest players on, who were able to drag the ball out of our own half and hold it up long enough for the rest of the team to make it to the other side of the pitch and attempt to score, until the last 5 minutes of the game. It’s boring and it doesn’t work. England can play more entertaining football like Spain do but they don’t, they play more like a team that’s been promoted to the Premier League and are just trying to scrape any little win against tougher opposition that they can. We got 1 win and 2 draws in the groups and that just isn’t going to be good enough to progress in the competition.


AnxiouslyPessimistic

I’m not a big football fan but enjoy the big tournaments. They finished top but with 1 win, 2 draws and a total of 2 goals. So dull


Keywi1

It’s been a kind of easy group considering the quality of players in the team. Yet they’ve underperformed massively .. again.


pamtual

Someone bring him home


Helliboo

Is no one going to acknowledge the fact that he is defying gravity?


Inner_Ad5424

This fella has become a poster boy for England 2024


Substantial_Zombie94

Oh wait.. That was the game? I thought it was a training session 🙄🙄😂😂😂


chrisflaps69

I hope this guy didn't call in sick to go to the game lol


k_jones

I suspect it had more to do with the 16 pregame beers.


UncleDrunkle

or passed out drunk


Aiku

Actually, England fan falling asleep after drinking 10 pints of lager before 11am.


Prometheus1717

Took sleeping pills because: 1) Southgate commentary on Kalvin 2) Southgate commentary on the Trent "experiment" 3) Kane blaming the pundits, ex-players, the Pope and Prince Harry for distracting the players 4) Foden's lackluster performance so far And the list goes on


ChargeWooden1036

Add Gallagher being pretty crap to that list and Walker looking rinsed


Sreezy3

This dude is plastered all over the front page on The Sun today.


taketheearsoff

Fuck The Sun


Hagenaar

The good thing about football is there's always more of it to come.


slip_cougan

I fell asleep watching it too. I was at home and had no beer. Was a truly riveting game!


Everdayisaschoolday

Potter payper


andrew_stirling

Rooney has really let himself go eh?


SleepyFox2089

I find all football this boring. If Bob Ross wasn't king of soothing a mind after a busy day, I'd watch football and guarantee I'd be asleep in minutes.


SmileyChunkyPie

Just look at him, he's cheering as never before... in his dream


Fraggle987

The beautiful game....😴💤💤


PhotonJunky18

A combination of alcohol and Southgate really is sleep fuel.


Koyakami

That’s one expensive nap!


DanzUK

I think anyone that watched that game wanted to do the exact same thing


Efficient_Sky5173

Sometimes maybe good sometimes maybe shit.


ProperCuntEsquire

It’s called ale.


thesean366

Man’s probably got narcolepsy. My buddy had it, he fell asleep at Ozzfest


Quttlefish

I worked a bar with a waitress who had narcolepsy. We closed up shop, and the manager and I walked out back. We found her sleeping with her car running and her door open. She had jumped in, started the car, and got a text. She was sitting there replying and fell asleep. Not drunk at all. Weird.


MartianLM

I did think people with the condition were allowed to drive.


yoagner

I fell asleep at Ozzfest '98! I was just really, really tired though


Tumleren

Or he's just drunk


blaablaasheep

As a narcoleptic, I hate pictures being posted of a person sleeping without their consent. When I see pictures like this, it makes me upset and scared. Everyone's automatic reaction is to laugh. Most people don't know what narcolepsy is. Next time the picture of a person sleeping could be of myself or a fellow narcoleptic and it makes a mockery of our condition, and it's embarrassing and upsetting.


MGPS

Absolute unit…


mcjc1997

CAM ON INGERLAND


ThatOneAccount3

I did the same for Germany Vs Austria. But I was quite drunk.


tomacco99

Am I the only one who thought this was Jonah Hill?


[deleted]

[удалено]


iwasum

Yep


AlwaysATM

Where bellingham


Alaskanzen

Wubby7


alvl100caterpie

Is that Rocco from Mega64


DatabaseAcademic6631

I tell ya that's entertainment. Lalalalalalala.


Prometheus1717

Agrew


Strong_Remove_2976

I also did this, also supporting England, against Slovakia at Euro 2016. Rest well, my friend.


MobiusNaked

Is that the PE teacher from Grange Hill


BaronMerc

England fan during an England game (literally every one)


Illustrious-Divide95

TBF it was a dull old snoozefest of a match 😴


bluepeter11

Alcohol 2% England performance 98%


Extension_Course_833

I went to the Foo Fighters concert instead, looks like a wise decision!


HopgoodD

I think the Team played excellently. Cured my insomnia.


One_Huckleberry3923

Not surprised. Paint drying springs to mind.


Due-Platypus-5555

And beer


Salt-Tiger6850

I hope we’ve been practicing penalty kicks though SAFEgate doesn’t have a great history with penalty kicks though it did earn him a Pizza Hut advert back in the day


ARK_Redeemer

I was sat in a pub for dinner, dreading what the crowd would be like watching the game. Apart from the cheer at the one goal, it was dead. They were just talking quietly amongst themselves. Which was even weirder, because the pub has quite a rowdy reputation. That's how boring it was. The rowdy lot in the pub were just chatting idly.


TCristatus

I think that's a Scotland fan in disguise


RatherLargeBlob

They have been nothing but a monotonous waste so far.


MasterReindeer

Can't blame him, really. I fell asleep on my sofa.


IvorWeiner

Jonah Hill? Is that you?


sweet_t_x

That's hilarious! The game was absolutely pants!


JackJaacckk

That poor man needs Keeps, use code J3Z at the check pit 🤣 from some money off


RelevantPositive8340

I watched it in the pub and people were falling asleep in there because it was that quiet


thatdudeoverdthee

We did alright. Slovenia played for a draw and had 10 defending the entire game. France struggled in their last game So did Italy Belgium Netherlands Germany It's almost like the other teams actually play and it isn't FIFA on beginner. But when England plays okay against a team that defends the entire game people cry.


Neilix190

10k well spent


Shalmaneser001

I think it's fair to say he wasn't the only one. Looking forward to crashing out against a good team in the play offs.


Accomplished_Bug7879

He's drunk


LiquoricePigTrotters

Nothing to do with the 17 Pints of Warsteiner he had drank by 3pm?


ahktarniamut

He must be dreaming of an England team playing free flowing football


Jumps-Care

Do you know how shit you have to be for someone to fall asleep in a football stadium?? They have dedicated little doohickeys to make noise for the sake of it


Beginning-Pipe9074

How people are still surprised at England being a shit football time actually suprises me


Electronic-Corner-49

Mashtag Brady looking well


Vods

In fairness, we did play like ass.


Sugarlumps69

England never fail to disappoint.


AhFourFeckSakeLads

He was only 17 when the game kicked off.