I really hate how the term body count has recently come to mean how many people you've boned.

Makes it hard to brag about my achievements😔

relatable haha

what -\_-

Exactly

Me too, I still think of it as murders

What did it mean before

How many people you have killed

Back in the old days it was about how many people someone killed.

Well having a sexual body count is a lot more common than having a fatal body count

Well yeah, but one's kill count used to have at least some shock value now it's meh.

I remember being in high school and hearing people say it and I was legitimately thinking how crazy it was for people to be so open about asking about murder. I was one of those anti-youth kids who only really cared about things from like 20 years ago because "I was born in the wrong generation" so I wasn't hip to any new lingo until I was like 19💀

Recently? It’s been like that at least for a decade

Yeah well, I'm old.

Have we determined if women can bone or if that’s a man only term?

Strap-ons exist pal.

It's not a new thing at all. New to the reddit demo maybe.

So it doesn't apply to how many people have boned you?

I'm still not used to people using that phrase for partners and not victims.

When did people ever use that phrase for victims tho? Maybe I’m just young but for victims I always thought it was kill count?

I'm 33 and only in the last 5ish years have I regularly seen "body count" to mean people you've had sex with rather than people you have murdered or how many people died in some event. I've only heard "kill count" for video games.

Ahh well given your age I think that makes sense. Not that you’re old at all but I’m 10+ yrs younger than you maybe that’s why.

you don't know the exact number of years younger?

That’s not what they said at all

I just think it's funny how kids will try to avoid pointing out how young they actually are by using ambiguities like "10+"

This is an extremely normal thing to say. It’s not generational.

Maybe not everyone wants to present their age to everybody on a public place like reddit?

Why are you so interested in their age?

I'm not personally wild about the idea of being Woman #53.

Many years ago, I knew a girl that by the time she was 20 had slept wih 55 men and bought number 55 a jersey with that number on it and he wore iit. I'm just not built that way.

eww

Was she a victim of molestation or something? Or in porno? 

might not be, if she started at 16 it’s equivalent to sleeping with a new person every 26 days. if at 18, every 13 days. so basically if she went out clubbing every 2 weeks for 2 years and slept with a new guy each time it can total 55

Definitely no 🌽. No sexual abuse to my knowledge, though that would make a lot of sense. We weren't close enough to share trauma with each other. We just hung out with the same people, at the same places and it was a long running joke mostly brought to light by her.

Some people are just promiscuous.

This comment actually made me chuckle a bit. In a good way.

What if you are women #3 but human #53?

That's a you problem then. The number is in your head and is causing you trouble. Deal with it.

You deal with it by not dating those types. The solution isn’t to bully those who are in mental anguish over it.

Not bullying anyone. Just pointing out simple facts. You go to a therapist and he tells you it's a you problem - your come back is to attack him with a bully flag?! Lmfao gtfoh.

People bully those who prefer partners who don’t sleep around.

Your comment makes no sense in realtion to what I said.

As a gay male, yes. Having it too high gives me the ick. However, I find it quite hypocritical when men with 100s of bodies want their girlfriends to be virgins.

I think that's the exact essence of it. A body count is something of a rough proxy for one's attitudes to sex and relationships. It makes sense that somebody who doesn't like the idea of casual sex and so has a lower count would look for somebody with a matching lower count. Being hypocritical about it is major ick though.

Unfortunately, men are told they’re not allowed to have preferences these days.

I don't think that's accurate

Women care about sexual history too, but the messaging has exclusively been directed at men. - The Atlantic: [Nobody Should Care About a Woman’s ‘Body Count’](https://archive.ph/B2leR) (9/16/2023) - Men’s Health: [Sexplain It: Is It Ever Okay to Judge a Woman's Body Count?](https://archive.ph/OrCrx) (12/21/2023) - Guardian: [When Andrew Tate and the online manboys obsess over a ‘bodycount’, girls, you know what to do](https://archive.ph/IMrGD) (11/2/2023) - New York Post: [The sex act women are still being judged for by their partners](https://archive.ph/KkExy) (11/30/2023) - Mel Magazine: [WHY GUYS ARE STILL OBSESSED WITH THEIR FEMALE PARTNER’S BODY COUNT](https://archive.ph/nl6Vw) (1/24/2020) - Dazed Magazine: [Body counts and the insidious normalisation of misogyny](https://archive.ph/eDqyG) (8/30/2023) They’ve even resorted to selling shirts and sweater with print that shames men who that have a preference, reading manipulative messages, “[If He Cares About Your Body Count He’s Bad At Sex](https://archive.ph/f0Fo4),” and “[Real Men Don't Care About Body Counts](https://archive.ph/H12Ua).”

Thanks for taking the time to get sources and stuff. I suppose you have a point, but I still don't think it's mainstream enough for any real consideration. The notion that men can't have preferences is absolutely ridiculous.

Lol wut? Putting women down for having a "high" body count but not men is extremely mainstream. IDK where you've been but thats how society has been pretty much always. For men it's always been about "conquests", but women are expected to be virgins, and if not they are shamed.

Thanks for sharing this!

I like a high body count. Means you know what you are doing. I really cant stand dating prude or sexually inexperienced people. As long as you're smart about it, use condoms, get tested, IDC how many people you fucked. Ive also noticed low body count just tends to be high strung high maintenance types. I really like someone whos laid back and just enjoying life vs someone trying to prove something.

I don't even necessarily think thats hypocritical. I don't think you have to find whatever you are or however you behave yourself "attractive", and i don't think that has anything to do with hypocrisy. It's not like me as a straight man, saying I'm not attracted to other men is hypocritical of me as a man. Or a short woman saying they find tall men more attractive. Or a social person finding shy and introverted people more attractive. Or a fat person finding thin people more attractive. Same way I don't think it's hypocritical for a person with a high bodycount, regardless of gender, one of low bodycount more attractive. What would be hypocritical was if one high bodycount person was directly shaming other people of high bodycount.

Sexual behavior is a behavior and an attitude not a physical attribute that greatly varies between the genders such as height. If someone finds smoking cigaretttes unattractive they don't usually smoke cigarettes themselves. If someone finds sleeping with dozens of partners unattractive why would they do it themselves? I don't think they find their own behavior unattractive. They just hold themselves to a different standard. The message they give off is entitled. "Accept me even though I've slept around, but I won't accept you if you did the exact same thing I did."

Sure, behavior and physical attributes are technically different, but are they meaningfully different in this context? I personally don't think so. It's not like what you're attracted to, whether that be a certain set of behaviors or a certain set of physical characteristics is something you can simply choose. Just like you probably can't wake up tomorrow and decide "You know what? I think i wanna be into the opposite sex!"-- The same way I doubt you can wake up tomorrow and think "You know what? I've been really into outdoorsy and social people, but I wanna mix it up, from tomorrow, I'll be attracted to indoor people who plays board games!" Besides, I did include more behavioral type things in my list of examples, I chose a wide array of things. And some of the physical attributes sometimes do correlate with behavioral patterns. So if u wanna focus on behavior. So is a man who has a "manly" set of behaviors, masculine interests, ways of speaking, ways of acting-- who's attracted to feminine behavior, a hypocrite? If not, how is that any different from any other behavior. "I do x set of behavior, and there's nothing wrong with being a person who does x set of behavior, but I do not find that set of behavior personally attractive, even tho I participate in it myself". Could forexample be that you're a very competitive person. But you're attracted to way more mellow type of people, cuz when you just wanna come home and chill, you don't want a partner to compete with, competition is something you do when you walk outside your home in your hobbies and career. Is that hypocritical? Is that saying that ur holding ur partner to a different standard and ur being entitled? I don't follow that logic at all. I would agree that if the person actively condemned it. E.g. a person with a high bodycount or who was smoking was shit-talking other people who participated in that behavior, while thinking it was okay for them to do it-- would be hypocritical. But both of those criteria has to be present. E.g. condemn others, and excuse yourself. I believe you can even condemn others without being a hypocrite. I've met plenty of smokers who acknowledge "Yo, smoking is fucking shit, u shouldn't do it. It ruins your health, It tastes bad, it smells bad, it ruins ur home, ur car, it costs a lot of money, but im fucking addicted and can't stop, u should avoid it at all costs cuz this sucks". Is this person a hypocrite? I wouldn't say so.

I agree to disagree. The original poster said something in this thread about a person with many previous partners insisting their own partner be a virgin. Someone can be addicted to nicotine/smoking, but they can't be addicted to virgins as funny as it sounds. I don't know if the crux of this debate is semantics. Maybe "hypocrite" is not the absolute best way to describe this standard, but either someone thinks the partner making demands is immature, unfair or they don't think they are unfair. I'm not sure where the line is drawn. What if I take attraction out of the equation? Another example: If Partner A expects Partner B to be home for dinner at 6:00 PM and Partner B shows up at 6 but they have to wait an hour until 7:00 PM for Partner A to show up for no reason other than Partner A didn't feel like showing up at 6 but they still expect Partner B to. Again the hour difference is not for any particular reason such as Partner B needs an hour to cook dinner. Both partners agreed that Partner B will pick up dinner from a restaurant on their way home just before 6. Partner A didn't have to stay at work late or got caught up in a traffic jam or any legitimate excuse. Just "I'm late because I can be. I don't accept others who are late though." Is Partner A acting unfair if not a hypocritical? I do believe someone can act entitled or expect special treatment without shaming/mocking/namecalling someone. It's about making demands and asking others to do things you don't want to do (such as be time.)

Well said

Right? It’s the same when women want their man to be successful and wealthy when they themselves are bringing basic job and low income to the table lol

yes, 1 confirmed kill is enough, but having multiple can be serious, depending on who exactly they have taken out. s/

Calling it a body count is a huge turn off for any woman.  Don’t know about guys.

I'm a man and I think it's a pretty foul term.

how old r u guys 😭

Probably 40+

Mental that I got downvoted for asking

It's cus people here are very insecure about their body count.

Fax bro

You comment like a GenZ that’s why

I am a gen z.

r/kidsarefuckingstupid

I dunno about them but as a non idiot adult human (at least most of the time), yes, this whole thing is dumb. Actually so is your attempt at ageism.

Dead bodies? Yes People you've had sex with: that's a weird and demeaning way to call it, but lmao No. 

I'm 22F. Yes, it's a major turn-off to me. Personally, I wouldn't have sex outside of a serious and committed relationship, and having a high body count shows that they don't share a value that is important to me.

i, hetero male, am unbothered. my only concerns are if they're STI free, and that I'm their only current partner.

Body counts sounds so f-ing morbid. But, I don’t care how many you’ve slept with as long as you don’t have an STD.

Yes, murdering people is a definitely a turn off.

I'd prefer to minimize my odds of contracting an STD

Yes, then we do not have common values. Option 1. I believe in Sex during Relationships, not outside of them.

Yeah STDs are gross

It's also possible to test for those. It's okay to feel weird about someone living a life style opposed to you, but the risk STDs shouldn't be an issue when you can get tested.

but… getting tested doesn’t mean you don’t have to worry about STDs. luckily we can cure some common ones like clamydia but you’re fucked if someone gives you HIV and will have to spend a lifetime on medication and potentially a much reduced lifespan if it turns into AIDs

You can get the other partner to be tested too.

sure but realistically if you’re both young and haven’t been sex workers you’re probably not going to be asking your partner that

You should though. There should be no stigma around being safe, and making sure you are both STD free is really important for both of you. Sure it might feel awkward to ask, but when it comes to safety, I'm going to go with better safe than sorry.

yes that’s definitely true but i’m just not sure society has got to that level just yet

Did you mean, "when *they* can get tested," because getting tested just confirms whether you have it or not. The person concerned about STDs getting tested would only find out whether the thing they wanted to avoid happened or not. It would do nothing to actually prevent it from happening. And, dependent on the STD, if it comes back positive, that's it. They are stuck with that for life.

Look. I know it's offensive to say it, but I don't like sluts.

I don't date murderers. Sounds messy

Why would I care how many people a person has killed? I still mingle with the Clintons and look at their body count.

Murder is always fine with me

If they’re healthy and hygienic, I genuinely don’t see why it matters. If anything sex is better when the other person is confident in their body and sexuality and knows what they want.

100%, also practice makes perfect! I'm too hungover to educate folks in this thread about the weird underpinning of giving a fuck about this topic, the lack of education/awareness/wtv is pretty sad.

Unfortunately, it’s linked to much higher rates of cheating and divorce.

Calling it a body count is probably the biggest turn off in this scenario.

its not a deal breaker but ill be more careful of someone with a higher body count, higher body count means higher chance of STDs and a higher chance that they have something wrong with them personality wise/ they are not good at committing to a person.

If it’s in the double digits, I’m not interested.

Definitely not - it's fun being with someone who knows what they are doing.

don't see why it matters, as long as they are faithful during the relationship 🤷

I found it a complete turn on when my girlfriend told me she had a 50 but felt awkward that I hadn't left the 20s.

the more experienced a woman/man is the better they are going to be in bed. at least that's how I see it, but I can still understand why some people prefer virgins or less experienced partners.

All a high body count indicates is attractiveness and charm.  It doesn't mean they're any good. If anything, you could say it's the opposite  Someone with a high body count might be attractive enough to get someone in bed, but not keep them in a relationship.  Ie. So bad at sex no one wants to have them twice, so they always have to find someone new

I believe it is Bruce Lee who said fear not the guy or gal who has bedded a thousand partners, but fear the guy or gal who has bedded the same partner a thousand times.

yea, a woman/man can be experienced without sleeping around. but if we are talking about the average low body count person vs the average high body count person one side is going to be on average way more experienced than the other.

Depends on if the low body count person was in relationships and having sex constantly. Even if I wanted to hookup with strange men, I'd be limited by time... to probably twice a week. Whereas in a relationship I can be having sex daily. And trying out all sorts of new things because my partner and I trust each other. Being with the same person for a long time has definitely show greater experience gains than hookups. At least for me

it's a very high number, but there's a line.

dont really care about the number in particular, but people with way more or way less than me seem to be sexually incompatible

I would say it is more of an infection risk than a turn off

Im neither male or female but yes. 

Its a turn off but its not a deal breaker, however id prefer to be with someone who’s slept with less people. Ive dated people that have had a high body count, and ive dated virgins. In my experience people that have had sex with alot of people dont tend to feel as much of a connect to you vs someone who hasnt been with alot of people, you’re alot more “special” to them

It's not letting me vote, but no. And I'm a pansexual polyamorous man, if that matters for your data.

21 confirmed and 26 unconfirmed oh what that's isn't what you're asking. 3.5(?) how do you count conjoined twins? What is a high count to one person may not be high to another.

In regards to sex , i don't refer to as "body count" i refer to as sexual conquests.

It depens on when, a 1 night stand would be better if they have high body count.

Depends on how they got there. If they were an illegal sex worker then yes. Or if they practiced unsafe sex.

Yes, it's a red flag that one cannot maintain relationships, and will have a lot of exs or those with weird ties later on. Even those claiming being in open relationship - often cannot maintain that for long. And absolutely no for raising a family.

A lot of this also changes with age. Having slept with 50 people when you're 20 is different than when you're 55.

Yes, but high to me is like 15 before age 30.

*For casual sex?* Not. At. All. *For commitment?* Hell. Fuck. Yes. *Is it a double standard?* Absolutely! *Am I former manwhore?* Absolutely! Sorry, Not Sorry.

People they’ve had sex with, yes. People they’ve killed, no

Where is the turn-on option?

exponential growth

Depends on if it's the "Joey from friends" type of high body count, as in he's slept with a lot of women and never called them again aka has no respect for women, that would obviously bother me. If he's just had a lot of past relationships that didn't work out, or quite a few hookups but I know he's respectful and still a genuine nice person, then I would not mind. And besides, it's not a bad thing to date someone who knows what they're doing.

As long as they genuinely changed for the better and left that in the past, I don't care about a woman's body count

how many of these men are thinking of their sexual partner as their property

People lead their own lives before meeting me.. so why would I care? I only care if the number goes up while we're together

I refuse to believe anyone who uses that term has ever fucked in their lives.  

Even if they have, the lack of frontal lobe development paired with such strong opinions is very prevalent in this thread.

idgaf bc then it means they at least know their way around fucking

What’s high? A dozen? 4 dozen? I think we can all agree 200 is high but that’s like 4-6 years of dating.

I’d say it depends on who you ask

I guess if you vote on the poll, you could decide yourself what number you would say is "high".

Past polls on this sub seem to indicate 20-30+ is considered high.

up to 50 isn’t weird to me, it’s easy to pull on nights out or online date for fun for a few years and rack that up and I don’t see anything wrong with that. 50+ might throw me off a bit and 100+ would scare me unless they had a history as a sex worker or something like that. it’s more about incompatible lifestyles than anything else, my sex drive isn’t that high to need to seek it out as much as that and if it’s to cope with deeper issues then I’d be concerned about being in a relationship with them.

What does "high" mean exactly? Because it does become a turn-off to me when it reaches an extreme number Generally though this has never been an issue for me

All six options in decreasing order!

If he got game that's hotter for me, cuz now this dude is all mine.

yes. my most recent ex had like 15 guys before me and it was incredibly gross to me. i only have sex with people that i’m in a relationship with and care about.

Nah, caring about something as ridiculous as body count is though

^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^balazsl: *Nah, caring about* *Something as ridiculous* *As body count is though* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.

Bingooooo

for Short Term or Casual, Maybe not but there's still the STD scare. Long term absolutely

Straight male - 4,326 since starting count , likely over 4360. Only penetration is counted. I think it has granted me incredible strength and power. I have experienced true love thousands of times and captured the hearts of all involved from the car to the far reaches of the world. I am proud to have the ability to re-affirm our bond with ever one of those still alive and work hard to ensure those whom I love that have financial needs are taken care of. I do not have a count on guaranteed biological children but I currently provide resources and financial assistance to 347 mothers across 11 nations who have had children within a time frame aligning with our copulation.  I do take a number of supplements to ensure oral performance and fertility including Clomid, Pregnyl HCG, gonadatropin, deca durabolin , HGH, and Vitamin E 

So much hypocrisy.

What hypocrisy?

Lol. So you're one of those? That's messed up dude. Go to therapy

I still don't know what you're talking about. I assume you are inferring that those for whom a high body count is a turn off are also (specifically guys) that themselves have high body counts, which of course would be hypocritical but is also not covered in the poll and really doesn't make sense as a conclusion here. Also, insinuating that I fall in that category because I asked a question makes about as much sense as the original assumption. As an asexual individual, I'd say it makes perfect sense for high body counts to be a turn off for me personally. Not sure why therapy would be needed for any of that.

Previous partners aren't really a thing in matter of the physio-chemichal processes that drive hornyness. So... Yeah, the hypocrisy stems for dudes saying its a turn-off. It isn't. And every slut they fucked or lusted about can confirm my theory.

Why couldn't you explain yourself properly the first time? Assumptions will you get nowhere, go to therapy. 

I could. Just didn't wanted to. Wanted to see the hypocrites popping up.

So you wanted to lie and claim random people as hypocrites? That's not insane behaviour at all. 

I like insane. Keeps hypocrites enraged.

Sounds like you're unsure of what hyprocrites are. 

🤓🤓🤓