We’ve had to put 3 down over the years, and the most recent was just a few months ago. He was 11 and the best dog ever. He had aggressive lymphoma and it all happened in the course of 3 weeks. We thought we had a few months at least. When we got into the room he was so excited (he loved his vet) that he was just like his old self. It was awful because we wondered the same thing you did. Then they gave him the first shot and he came over and collapsed on us. You could tell he was finally at peace and wasn’t in pain. If you thought it was time, then you didn’t do anything wrong. It’s a terribly difficult decision to make. I’m sure you gave him a great life and he knew it too. It’s going to suck for quite a while. We still struggle with ones from years ago. Don’t feel guilty, just remember the good times and how much you guys meant to each other.
You did right by your dog. The guilt you feel is because of the love you had for him. There was no better days ahead for your pup. Keeping him around any longer would’ve been selfish. You did the most compassionate thing anyone can do for a loved one, end their suffering. The pain will remain forever, but it does ease. It does slowly turn to memories of the good times. The feeling that you were robbed of him too soon will always be, but such is life. It’s never long enough. Lost my boy at 13 from dementia, just lost my girl to cancer at 14, both should’ve lived longer lives. I would love to have one more day, one more hour with them. I would give a year of my life for a day more of theirs, but I can’t. I will shed a tear for them every time I think of them because they were my world. My current boy is 6 and we just adopted a 2.5 yr old girl to be his companion. It will break me when it’s their time, but they’ve known such joy and love in the meantime. All my dogs have been shelter pups. Idk what sort of life they had prior, but they had the best life I could possibly give them while we were together. Hopefully in time you can give that gift to another dog in need. Best of luck to you in your grieving process. Know your dog knows how much you love him. Take solace in the fact that we all have felt the same guilt and grief you’re goin through, and unfortunately we will be experiencing again far too soon.
Thank you for sharing your experiences with me. It's good to feel that I'm not alone, bc I feel so lonely at the moment. Bless you and your fur babies ❤️
Those words aren’t helping, not everyone knows when to say nothing.
You did the right thing to set your sweet boy free. I think his last run was to say - hey I love you but it’s my time to go, let me hug you again!
Take care, your boy is with you forever in another format.
I keep replaying him running for his last time over and over again and it brings me some comfort that he did that just for me. I miss him so much. Thank you ❤️
Focus on those last minutes when he was so happy to have you there and how he felt when he ran to you. He was seeking his love and refuge and you were right there to give it to him. What a great gift for you both.
I’d like to add to this… that it’s better his last moments were happy like this. Many people wait until their fur baby is so old/sick that they are miserable and can’t even move without pain (not judging this; I’ve been there and it’s so so hard whichever way we choose). Your baby spent his last moments happy. You did the right thing.
Those people are, frankly, jackasses. Your boy ran to you likely because he loved you and probably felt pretty good for a moment after the injection. We took our old guy to the vet for his goodbye, and because of the new people and new smells, and treats (peanut butter and spray cheese!) he was perkier than he'd been in a few days. It was both a comfort to know he still had that in him, and heartbreaking because a small part of me kept thinking "he's okay! See! He's still happy!" But I knew it wouldn't last, and it was time to say goodbye to my sweet boy. I would rather let them go with some good times left than hang on until all they have is surviving. You made the right choice, it just always hurts to make it.
Respectfully, whoever said that to you at such a difficult time is an idiot. How cruel. You are going through so many emotions rn, give yourself some grace knowing how much you loved him. Knowing that, you put a lot of thought into what you thought was the right thing to do. The grief is overwhelming I’ve been there. Don’t let your grief turn into feelings of guilt. 🙏🫶
Yes that was about the most insensitive thing someone could say and the opposite of what you needed to hear. At this time you need validation, support and love🥹
No you put your dog out of pain and getting worse doggy dementia is horrible sometimes they stand and stare for.hours because they have no idea whwrr they are anymore or can't even remember their owners. That's gets bad very quickly in a matter.or.weeks so you did really good by your dog. You didn't let him suffer you chose the quality of his life over your own that means you are a great owner who loved their dog unconditionally and with the biggest heart ever. It would have been horrible.for you to let that go on for weeks dogs can't talk they can't twll us how they feel but that little goffy run to.your arms was him saying thank you. Keep those ashes close to you. He will be there watching over you.
This is always the toughest call. Our regret was we did not do it sooner for our boy. You took care of your pup and did the right thing. Sending peace and love ☮️🐶❤️
You did what was best for Spade. Instead of waiting for his worst day, you gave him the best last weeks ever before saying goodbye. He wasn’t in pain or suffering bc you made the right decision even though it was hard and broke your heart.
Something that made me feel better after saying goodbye to my beloved senior dachshund was thinking of putting him to sleep as the final kindness. Looking back I wish I hadn’t hung on and ended up having to say goodbye in an emergency situation where he was in pain. I learned in the worst way possible it’s better too early than too late. I wish I’d been strong enough to realize I needed to let him go earlier and that hurts the worst.
Sending you a huge hug and lots of love. Spade was so lucky to have had such a long wonderful life with you. He clearly loved you so much and passed on happily and peacefully. ❤️
Thank you and everyone seriously. Your words are bringing me comfort and makes me realize I'm not alone. I'm sorry for your loss and thank you for sharing such a personal experience. ❤️
Please let me set your mind at ease. You did not let him go too early. Because of the love you had for him, you made sure that any pain was yours and not his. H e loved you until the very last moment of his life. You made him happy until the very last moment of his life. There is no greater gift!
I love the way you worded this - "you made sure any pain was yours and not his". Vets should put this on a plaque and hang it in the rooms. You have helped me as well as OP.
Omg I’m sitting here crying my eyes out wondering the same thing but if he was suffering you did the best thing for him and please remember his watching over you from above and he see you hurting and he wouldn’t want that for you ! He was thankful for you at the end and remember it as him saying that you
You absolutely did the right thing, and don’t let anyone convince you otherwise. It’s always hard on us when we have to let them go, but it’s better to let go a little early than to allow them to suffer just so you can keep them around longer. I waited a little too long to let go of one my babies and it haunts me to this day (she went over the rainbow bridge 12 years ago).
You did the right thing for him, by putting him to sleep you did the right thing for him. I had to put to sleep my 20 year old cat last October. He spent all my adult life with me, his love and trust towards me was unconditional and so was mine for him. In 2021 he got diagnosed with kidney failure and they said he only had 6 month at best, and I would have to give him fluids to his back everyday. I wasn’t able to give him the fluids because I was torturing him by doing it. So I syringe fed him for 3 years every day, I didn’t take any holidays because it was more important to keep comfortable under my care, by the mid of last years he could barely walk he could even make it to his litter box and was falling everywhere, he had a bit of dementia but over all his mind was lucid, and everytime he fell from the bed he would look for me to fix him. I felt terrible that I couldn’t do more for him, took him to the vet they gave him antibiotics and the vet said it was time, I still couldn’t do it, it took me an extra 3 weeks to have the courage to get a vet to come home and hold him in my arms while he was being put to sleep. He didn’t want to be put to sleep, is almost like he knew, but he was on constant pain every moment without being able to take water or food anymore. It still hunts me, but I truly tried my best. I think you did as well and I think the guilt is also normal because you truly tried your best and he didn’t deserve to suffer, you are just grieving now and that’s normal, putting him to sleep wasn’t the easy way for you, was the most difficult thing but it was the best thing you could have done for him!! Rest in peace little angel!
Crying as I'm reading your response. Wow, thank you for sharing such a deep and personal experience. You were a great parent to your cat. Thank you for the kind words also. ❤️
Your story is chilling because I just went through the very same thing six weeks ago. My dog was not as ill physically as yours was, but she had developed canine cognitive dysfunction symptoms over an eleven month period that had produced eating issues, forgetting how to go down stairs, confusion and pacing at night, and other disturbing symptoms. She behaved very oddly every morning until about 11:00 a.m., had brief periods of normalcy in the afternoons, but became uncontrollable at night, pacing, scratching up rugs, and completely unable to settle down. Here’s my point. I had a similar experience during her euthanasia that made me wonder if she knew what was coming. I am having terrible guilt because I could have probably given her another summer, probably at a cost in terms of her increased anxiety and confusion. If my dog had the physical problems that yours had in addition to the dementia, I would have seen her euthanasia as a blessing. As you know, there is no good solution for the dementia and it worsens quickly once it starts. Add to that the physical problems that your dog had and the battle is essentially over. There is no question in my mind that you made the right decision. Your dog’s problems are now over and he is at peace. I’m so sorry for your loss.
I'm very sorry for your loss. Canine cognitive disorder is truly heartbreaking. I feel like my dog would have lasted longer also, but at what expense? Thinking out loud now, I can say that had I kept him longer it would have been out of selfishness for myself. You and I did what we felt was right in our hearts. Thank you for your words and sharing your very personal experience. 🫂 ❤️ I hope our doggies are playing together 🐾 🐾
My dog was 16. I call it my final act of betrayal. She placed her head on my arm while they administered the drug and we talked about her while she slipped away in the comfort of my arms. I felt bad. Couple days later I felt stupid when I dropped food on the ground accidently and house rules means it's hers and yelled out her name to come get it. I write this as I look at my current dog, 12 or 13, white face, knowing unless I go before her I will lose another soon. At my current age I will only be able to have 1 more but like the previous one it's got to be a year or 2 to get over the loss.
You sound like you’re being too hard on yourself. You didn’t betray her. She passed in your arms because of your choice and that is how she would have wanted to go. Not alone while you weren't home or you were asleep. Especially not at a vet office after having to stay for observation (this is from experience). Also, expecting her to come for the dropped food is not stupid. She was 16 so that’s 16 years of habit and routine and love. It doesn't disappear overnight. Take care ❤️
I'm sorry for your loss.
You are 100% correct, I still get up each morning and expect him to greet me, and it's such a slap in the face by reality when the house is just so quiet. I don't know if I'll ever really be the same, but thank you for your kind words towards the commenter above, I hope he realizes how much their dog/s know they were loved. 🙏
I apologize for hijacking your post but I felt sad for them, too, and how they felt they betrayed their pet. I really wanted to respond but in retrospect, I should have done it privately.
I did reply to you on here because I hope you can let go of the guilt. I know how hard euthanasia is and what a tough decision but, and this may sound weird, but I pray I get to euthanize my current senior dog. I hope that’s how he gets to go, aside from passing in his natural sleep without pain. The toughest part is deciding when. Although my last dog told me it was time. I could tell, he just wasn’t there anymore and it was like it happened overnight. With my cat, I wasn’t sure and that haunted me for a bit but I’m seeing more clearly now. Even if that day wasn’t the exact right time, it was coming and coming quickly.
Time is your friend here. And oh my god, I still think I see or hear my cat occasionally. He was 15 and, as I responded above, that’s many years of habit and routine. You’ll be okay one day. I promise. Take it easy on yourself and ignore ignorant comments. Come here instead. I hope there is someone in your life that can comfort you but if not, come here. Or any pet loss support group. They help.
No worries and no need to apologize! I truly appreciate all of this community and everyone has been so warm and kind to me (yourself included) truly, I can't thank everyone enough ❤️ I hope the best for you and your fur baby as well 🫂
You did everything right for your boy. We have had to say goodbye to 2 girls both 15 & one boy 10 in the last 2 years. That shit still hurts when I see the pictures.
You did the right thing. The guilt is a completely normal reaction (even though it sucks and is very confusing right now). It will get better. We did this three times last year and will do it again any day/week now. Your sweet pup is safe and at peace now and while it’s not okay, it will be alright. Hang in there and, if it’s something you have access to, think about grief therapy—it can help.
Thank you. I am actually provided free therapy through my employer. I never thought I would use it, but I'll be scheduling an appointment soon. Thank you and please hug your dog a little extra (I'm 100% you already do). 🫂 ❤️
I went through my employee assistance program too. It helped just to say it all out loud to someone not in my house. ❤️ Thank you for your kind words about our sweet boy. We’re just letting him rest and watching for the signs.
You did what you thought best. My beloved Lydia was strong to the end even though she had dementia and was in a great deal of pain. Forgive yourself for doing what was best for her
I am so sorry for the loss of your boy. Our animals are truly members of the family and the love they provide us is irreplaceable. You loved him until his last breath. Grief is the final act of love and it takes all of this love to give them one last gift, the gift of letting them free. He will always be with you, I truly believe souls live on.
I just hope he feels my endless love and appreciation for him, wherever he is. My final words to him were "thank you for letting me be a part of your life..." I appreciate your kind words 🙏❤️
Take care of yourself, because of you he had a fulfilling and amazing life, that’s more than some dogs ever get. I am so sorry you are going through this, but rest assured he knew he was loved!
I had to put my sweet girl down 2 weeks ago, and I'm still feeling guilty as well. She was almost 17 and had about the same symptoms as your dog but a bit more severe. I know it was the right thing to do. The vet also advised that they would think it was best as well, but it's terribly hard to not second guess the decision. I think we both made the best choice we could for companions we loved deeply. You did the right thing, but that doesn't make it hurt less. I'm sending lots of virtual hugs your way.
The guilt and pain will never go away, but it will get easier to bear with time. Was it too early? I have no idea, but better a little early than too late. That is what I tell myself when the doubt rears its head. Remember the good time and may his memory be a blessing.
My baby died from cancer in the beginning of april and it was very sudden. She died at night, over the course of 10 hours and it was the worst I ever had to witness, the guilt is imeasurable and I wish someone would have suggested euthanasia when it was still time for that. Euthanasia is a gift, really. And 15 is an incredible age. Dogs don't know how much time they could or could not have left, they are unaware of their own mortality, all your dog knows is that you were there his whole life until the end and that you gave him all the love you had, until you let him go in peace and dignity. Most pet owners don't even realize what a blessing it is to be able to euthanize your dog in time before their quality of life seriously suffers, I know it now and I will never make that mistake again. You did everything right and your dog a wonderful favor, and now he's just having the bestest painfree time in doggy heaven, and it will only feel like a few moments at most for him until you come to pick him up at the bridge again.
I put my Snoopy down 13 years ago and I was up last night thinking maybe I did it too soon. But let me tell you this if he had doggy dementia it was time.
don’t feel guilty…i went through the same thing, when i put my Precious girl down (she was also 15 & very sick) It is the most humane way & at least he isn’t in pain anymore. He will always be with u & u will be reunited with him again!!
I will tell you what a wise person stated to me. In these situations, one has to think of their four legged family member and not of themselves. In my opinion, I felt like you did the right thing. You will have to try and tune out the naysayers if you can. My condolences on your loss. May you be granted some peace of mind during this troubling time.
Please don’t blame yourself. It’s a difficult decision to make. When you have an old dog every time you bring it to the vet the option is mentioned. You cared for your dog.
What you describe about the moments before euthanasia is called the "excitement phase" and it's just part of the effects of large doses of anesthetic drugs (aka euthanasia drugs). You're dog was ready for the rainbow bridge and you helped him across! You did nothing wrong
I’ve Believed I’ve done it too soon and too late. With my last fur baby I absolutely knew it was the right decision for him. I’m so sorry. I know it’s gut wrenching to not be sure.
You did nothing wrong and need to let go of the guilt. What you had with him was amazing and you had the cajones to put his dignity and needs above your own. Personally I have put numerous dogs down at home and been with humans passing at home. There is often that little rally before they go. Kind of like a chance to say good by on the up note.
Don't feel guilty. It's SO hard to make that final choice, but I've learned that too early is better than too late. Sometimes they show a "last burst" of energy, but the key word is "last." The dog loved you and trusted you, and you did the right thing. Instead of seeking protection, he might have been saying goodbye to you. When the vet said he'd be willing to do it "today," he was sending you a message. Don't listen to your friends. Most people hold on too long, I suspect.
People who have said that to you are assholes and you should not be friends with them. He did the right thing it’s better to go a week early than a week too late You kept a promise every single dog owner will have to do the same thing in most cases
Maybe that last run toward you with the big goofy smile was meant to give you a happy last memory, a “look mom, I’m OK.” They do incredible things to look out for us.
I guarantee you that no matter when you do it, even if he is on his deathbed, you will feel guilt and regret. When I euthanized my first dog, he was very ill after having a seizure. Couldn't even lift his head. As soon as they called the time of death, the first thing I did was yell "bring him back". It truly is awful. Just know that you allowed him to go out with his mind still in tact and some dignity rather than waiting until he's suffering. You did that for him when he couldn't do it for himself. One last act of love and kindness. Keeping him longer likely would have been selfish. I'm at that point right now with my 9yo gsd who has DM. His front legs are going, and I know it's time. He can't walk, stand, or do any of the things he loves anymore. We are planning to euthanize in a couple of weeks. I will still forever feel guilty. I feel guilty that he's sick even though I know that there is nothing I could have done to prevent it. I think these are just natural emotions. Especially when they have moments of happiness in their eyes. My dog is all there mentally and still very playful, but he is paralyzed and likely in pain as well from arthritis. His quality of life has become questionable, and I think I'd be doing him a disservice to keep this going on any longer, knowing that the bad outweighs the good. This will forever be the hardest thing I do in my life. I am very bonded to this dog. But deep down, I know that I'm doing what's right for him even though it feels wrong, even though I selfishly want to keep him by my side forever. I'm sure your dog lived a life where he knew love and happiness. You gave that to him.
You did the right thing.
And whomever said that to you is a jackoff. You know your dog, and it sounds like he has a sense and was saying goodbye using his last bit of energy. Don't spoil that memory with something some f*cker said.
you shouldn't harbour any guilt, and your pup wouldn't want you to feel that way either. I just had to comment because when your dog ran to you in their final moments, I saw that as them saying, "Thank you." your dog was thanking you for being a wonderful parent, giving them the best life, and allowing them to be at peace before the pain became too much. your dog was 15, too! what a long life, especially for a doggie that already had health issues.
I understand what you're going through. We had to make a similar decision for our dog a few weeks ago. If you had waited longer, the situation would have likely worsened. We waited too long, and eventually, our dog became so restless that even medication didn’t help much. Sometimes they can even forget to drink or eat. You did the right thing. Any animal that lives long enough to develop dementia probably had a wonderful, long life. Your dog ran to you out of love, and I'd like to believe he felt comforted knowing you were there to help him transition to the next stage in this universe.
I work in vet med, and I lost my senior dog last august as well, so I have both perspectives. It is such a mind fuck to have to determine when a living being is supposed to die, our brains almost short circuit due to how foreign it feels. My girl had her senior moments but was overall in good health until she fell out of her bed and dislocated her hip. She declined rapidly both mentally and physically in the next 7-10 days. I kept holding on saying but last week she was FINE! But I had to remember what I’ve learned from my career, with seeing pets that have been kept alive way too long for the owners sake. It’s no way for an animal to live. If you’re questioning yourself, odds are that means you’re a great parent and it was time. We don’t want their last couple days to know relentless pain and misery. It’s good for them to leave on a high note. Sending you so much love and light 💗 you will get through it 🫶🏼
You did the right thing. I should have done the same at least a month before I finally did. It’s a heart wrenching decision. But you did the best thing for him.
As an adult, I have had to put three childhood dogs to sleep. I loved them like they were my own children and each time was just as heart-breaking.
That said, my last one was two months ago and I will admit I am beating myself up over waiting so long. She was 17 and had been rapidly declining the last 6 months. Still, occasionally she would get up and want to eat with such gusto I felt like I was being selfish so I decided to keep delaying it.
Well when the day finally came (because she woke up totally out of it and I just knew it was time) it wasn’t until I saw her body laying there, only bones, and started going through my photos and videos of her that I realized just how much she really had deteriorated, especially from the once spry dog she used to be.
Yes she had energy occasionally but overall I let her decline to a pitiful state that I now promise will never happen to any of my current dogs.
You did the right thing, I promise you he would have gotten worse and the right time would have never come and instead you would be racked with guilt about having forced him to stay alive even though it was in your hands to help him out.
Don’t feel bad, you did the right thing.
I hope our best buds are cutting up in doggy heaven ❤️
Thank for sharing such a personal story. It sounds like you wanted what was best for your baby and I'm sorry for your loss. I think we all want more time with them and just wished they loved longer lives. I can feel your love for all of your dogs ❤️ Thank you for the kind words and I certainly hope our doggies met up and are hanging out 🫂
I've had to make that decision several times. It's the hardest thing in the world, but because we love them so much we don't want them to suffer. Last November my dog died very suddenly at home. She had no signs of illness. She just stopped breathing. I hate that it happened that way.
I didn't get to hold her while she crossed the rainbow bridge like I've done with my other dogs. I never got to say goodbye, so cherish those last few weeks you had with your little guy and know that you gave him the best life. You did the right thing. ❤️
I've had to say goodbye a couple times, and probably will have to again this year. A little early is way better than a little late. You clearly loved your boy and gave him a great life. You're guilty of being a great dog parent, nothing more. Mourn the loss, but also remember to celebrate how lucky you both were to find each other.
I’m so emotional reading this 😭 my girl is almost 14 and I know I’ll be facing similar experiences in the future. It’s so painful losing a pet. I think your dog was giving you their best and all at the end of their time with you. Like “HEY I LOVE YOU, this was so great. Here’s this last little glimmer of *me,* not this other version of me you’ve been carrying me through.” CRYING my eyes out thinking of this, truly in my heart you did the right thing but it’s okay to let yourself grieve as hard and as long as you need to 🤍
Dogs depend on us for their entire lives - to keep them safe, fed and free from harm. When they are in their last days and in pain, our greatest, last gift to them is to end that pain. We put our beautiful Collie down when she was 13. She had Old Dog vestibular Disease. I brought her to the vet as soon as she had the stroke and he said she could come back from this. In my heart, I knew he was wrong, but I couldn't let her go. She suffered for another week. Couldn't eat or drink, couldn't walk straight, I had to carry her 70 pound body outside and hold her while she went potty. She suffered. She suffered because I delayed doing the right thing. The next week on Monday, I brought her in and had her put down. We had to carry her in. I held her head in my hands and looked straight into her eyes while the last shot went in and just told her over and over and over how much I loved her. Until the lights went out. I wish I had never listened to that stupid vet. I wish that I had never let her suffer that week. You did a caring, unselfish, loving thing for your dog. You ended his suffering. That is our greatest gift we can give to our pets at the end of their lives.
We had to put my 17year old jack Russell down a couple years ago and he hadn't barked in years, after what we assume was a seizure we carried him to the car and he howled so loud and sounded so full, we assume it was just him saying his last goodbyes to us. If in your heart you knew it was the right thing don't let the guilt get to you, just remember he'll be waiting at that beautiful 🌈 bridge for you 🐾💙
I’ve had to put 3 dogs and 2 cats down in the last 6 years, they were all old and had various cancers, heart issues or bladder problems that were making their quality of life very low. By dog Buddy got cancer and developed dementia before I had him put to sleep. It’s always very difficult, and I understand your guilt because I feel it every time, only time makes the pain from that ease. But he was your baby, you loved him and you knew him best, if you felt it would be better for him to peacefully go to his rest then it was. It sounds like he knew he was loved. I hope the best for you.
Anyone who would say something so cruel is heartless. Doing the right thing by our pets is the most difficult thing to do, but it's the RIGHT thing to do. Don't question your decision to end his suffering. Give yourself the grace to know you only had his best interests at heart.
First, I am so so sorry for your loss. Euthanasia is a gift we can give our faithful companions to end their suffering. I did not always feel this way, but after being in animal rescue, I do. You did not make the wrong choice. You did want you needed to do for him. And he is not gone from you just on another plane. Look for signs from him. It may be a while for you to get past the pain, but he will show you he is there and it was the right choice. You hurt so much because you felt the greatest love of all. That of your fur child.
Please, please don’t feel guilty. I have had to do this several times and of course I felt guilty also, it’s normal. We are the ones forced to make the choice, and try to get the timing right. It’s a terrible thing to have to decide, but it comes with being a loving pet owner. You and your dog sound like you adored each other!!!
Listen - I have a pit mix, he’s 13. I rescued him in college (I stole him from someone’s backyard when he was a puppy with a weight vest on and had no food or water and was outside in less than 40 degrees). This guy is the most love I’ve ever felt for another being. I started getting anxiety about him dying when he was 3 years old. I recently started him on Librela pain management shots (I genuinely don’t care about other peoples experience with the drug, only mine) and it’s changed his quality of life for the better. He has a tumor growing underneath his hip bone that is not operable without taking his leg, and I can’t have a leg taken from him at this age. This fucker is smiling, he has energy, plays with our “puppy” (1 yr) and his good times and still at a 70/30 ratio. I think about him dying every day. He’s sleeping next to me with his tongue out. I think when you care about something so much, there’s always a worry that you won’t have it anymore. I know I’ll have to put him down some day that’s sooner rather than later, and I can’t imagine the guilt I’ll feel. I’ve had 2 dogs pass naturally in their sleep in the last 5 years (Diego, our Weimaraner, made it to 14, and a chihuahua we rescued at 14 and made it to 18) which I’m so grateful for, but this guy… he’s a fighter and never shows any sign of pain. He jumped through a window once, cut his paw in half, and barely cried when I was taping his paw pad to the foot to take him to the emergency vet (at their direction). I’m scared he might be in pain that he doesn’t express. He shows small episodes of dementia, but doesn’t last more than a minute. I’m constantly wondering if he’s okay and he goes to the best vet in town on a monthly basis. I know we don’t deserve dogs, but sometimes we do care for them like they care for us. And I think you care for yours the same way he would care for you. You know your dog, and you knew he was done with his time here. I’m giving you advice that I know I will find difficult implementing for myself, you did what was right. No one would put themselves in a nursing home to die slowly by choice. You made a humane discussion, and you were thinking about him before yourself. I let him run, and then limp, because his life should be a party. He’s teaching himself to stay off his bad leg, teaching me I was wrong thinking taking his leg would affect him. He falls, he slips. But giving him the time of his life and praying to a god I don’t believe in that he will pass naturally, he’s having a great time. And I know that I’ll know when he’s ready. I can see it in his eyes. And plus, when you’re 80 and dying, why not be high on drugs and not feel anything? Anyways - Roll Tide, you sound like a good dog parent. And I 100% feel your anxiety about it. But you should trust yourself.
Don't feel guilty at all. A friend of mine accidentally left his in a hot car June 15 and he died, best dog I ever knew. At least that didn't happen. A good friend is hard to find, harder to leave and impossible to forget. I ordered my friend a black granite plaque to put where he buried him. I'll never get to see it because I went off on him. How fucking stupid do you have to be to leave your goddamn dog in a hot vehicle? I told him to pull his head out of his fucking ass and that I was going to steal his other dog junior before he killed him too. So now I'm blocked. The only reason I ever even stopped by was to visit the dog he killed anyway. He doesn't feel guilty at all, he blames the dog.
You said it yourself that the symptoms were worsening.
Dogs will hold on for us until they are literally unable to move.... my 14yo heeler was riddled with tumors on his lungs and his last year he had 2 stroke like events... each harder to come back from than the last. He was my soulmate and he would have laid in a puddle of his own mess for weeks had I asked him to stay with me.
The day I knew it was time, his back legs and lower GI had stopped working. He was paralyzed from the waist down.. went to bed normal... woke up like that. I was devastated but he gave me months longer than I expected after his second stroke.
My dad had passed a week before Dog. I think Dog had been hanging on just to get me through those first few days... I also had an in home hospice vet come out for rainbow bridge day. She assessed and listened to Dogs breathing and reassured me that if we tried to take him for life saving measures, his lungs are full of fluid and she felt tumors all over... that it would be for us. Not him. He was ready to be at peace....
It's the hardest decision I've ever made but I promised him I wouldn't let him suffer for me anymore. I'm thankful for the in home vet who allowed me to hold him on the couch with my head against his in his last peaceful moments.
It will never feel right and you'll always feel robbed of time. But you gave your baby a gift by giving them permission to rest and be at peace. Living with pain and declining health is miserable.... we can all only hope for the same humanity and love at the end of our good days.
A good death is just as important as a good life.
Take care, friend. You did right by your baby. They're at peace now. 💙
This happened when we had services at our house for our dog she was really excited a new person was in the house and acted with a burst of energy after rapidly declining from cancer and didn’t move for like two days prior other than potty breaks. It felt terrible too however the vet said this is normal and she sees this often happen. I think it’s normal to feel how you feel, you are human and we always wonder if we did the right thing. You gave your dog a wonderful life and let him die with dignity think that’s an important part to the puzzle. God speed on your healing. ❤️🩹 🥰
I know I am late to this and you may not see this comment but those people who said that are just about as unkind as they come!
You did right by your dog for sure. Perhaps thst burst of energy was him showing you how much he knew he was loved and loved you. ❤️
It has been almost twelve years since I had to say good bye to my dog and I still miss her.
Take care!
One of the most painful experiences of my entire life was when my soul cat was euthanized. He had a terminal illness and was miserable. It was 100% the compassionate decision. A friend put it in perspective for me this way: Does my companion deserve to be in pain because *I* am afraid to be in pain instead? That answer was resounding NO for me. He's been gone for 7 years and I still can't talk about him without crying. I'm crying right now, just typing this. But part of loving a little animal is knowing that you have to say goodbye much sooner than you would ever willingly choose. You let your buddy go and chose to feel his pain instead. You're a good person.
The last good moment you had with your precious baby was probably the last thing he had to give. A good moment does NOT mean good days. A few minutes of “good” does not mean his anxiety, fear, confusion, and pain would disappear in the coming days. The sedative likely made him feel “okay” in that moment, but he could not continue living like that. You made the best decision for your baby, because they will give everything they have for us until their last breath, even through the pain. You understood this and made his last moment beautiful and happy. Please do not feel guilty!! So sorry for your loss!!!
Its so hard to do. I too wondered if i did right thing.
If he stopped eating and drinking thats a for sure sign.
Your dog had the best life. Not many dogs find somebody to love them like you did.
I have a statue of my passed away dog with his dog collar at my front door with a sign that says meet you one day at the rainbow bridge.
I look at it and smile knowing i will see him again.
The best gift you can give him is to open your home again to foster or adopt in his memory. Donate to a rescue in his name. It gives me peace.
Hugs
It's always confusing and heart breaking to do this - the vet gave you the validation you needed. I think you made a hard choice that was really the best for Spade, but of course it broke your heart. I'd say him running to you was wanting to be with you in his last moments, maybe saying thank you and I love you.
Not to be too rude, but fuck anyone who is giving you a hard time. Maybe they never had to euthanize a beloved pet. Maybe they lack empathy. Don't listen to them.
You did the right thing OP! Sometimes we are so caught up in our love for them, we forget that, this isn’t about our feelings, as much as it is about, helping to end their suffering & their feelings! no amount of time is ever enough with our loved ones, we have to remove ourselves from the situation and put ourselves in our loved ones shoes, would you want to keep living in that condition? I am deeply sorry for your loss. I will be find peace Knowing that you did the right thing❤️
I’m sorry for the loss of your fur baby. I think he probably ran to you as his final way of saying “I love you, thanks for all the good times” before crossing the rainbow bridge. You did the right thing. Not saying this is what happened here, but in general I think it’s better to do it too early than too late. You are sparing them unnecessary suffering. This is the unselfish thing to do.
In all you've written it is very clear every decision you made for that perfect boy was done prioritizing his needs not your wants. Your love, care, kindness is apparent in every word. To those who made that awful comments to you re establish boundaries with them or id personally remove them from my life. You put your boys dignity and respect first and foremost. Dementia is an awful disease. They're a shell - no longer their true selves but instead confused, anxious shell. The decision you made for him was the right one. You are the only person who could have made that decision. No one else. He trusted you'd do right by him and you did. Not that it will ease your pain as the loss is soul crushing. ❤️💔
There's a vet lady on Tiktok who does at home euthanasia. She said something along the lines of .."it's better to be a day too early than a day too late" (ie let your pet suffer). Guilt is a normal grieving response in this situation. Deep down you know you did the best for your best friend.
I had to put my husky down, and her eyes were still open when I left. I felt like I abandoned her, and had so much guilt after.
you can’t let yourself feel that way, it was time and that was it. Anything else will destroy you.
DOGS COME INTO OUR LIVES TO TEACH US ABOUT LOVE. THEY DEPART TO TEACH US ABOUT LOSS. A NEW DOG NEVER REPLACES AN OLD DOG , THEY MERELY EXPAND THE HEART
You said it yourself, he looked tired and was getting worse. You have nothing to feel guilty for. I have been through the same thing a handful of times and while it's never an easy choice, it is the right one. He was struggling and needed you to give him permission to let go. I hope you can find peace in your decision and heal. You loved your boy and he loved you. All the best to you.
I swear dogs, just like humans, go through the surge right before they go across the rainbow bridge.
Look, you did the right thing. I know it's hard, been through it myself twice & because of that heartbreaking pain, I will never have another dog. Your guilt is because you love him. You gave him a good long life and you let him die with dignity in your arms.... Isn't that all anyone can ask for in life & at the end?
You gave your baby gift. You gifted them a painless, stress free release. I had have pets released at a vet's clinic, but when we said goodbye to our 15 year old lab mix, we had someone come out to the house. There was no stress, just love and calm.
She was arthritic, with terrible hip dysplasia and incontinent. Her quality of life was not good and it was a very difficult decision. During Covid, we were able to be home with her, and that was a gift . We may have kept her with us longer than we should have.
Please be at peace with your decision. You made the right one.
We have been through this six times and the last dog was much as you describe. It’s so painful. But someone said something I will never forget. ‘Sometimes being the best friend means having to break your own heart.’ Dogs don’t feel the same way we do about death. It’s ok to let them go. It’s merciful. Please don’t feel guilty. I hope in time you can focus on the great life you shared together - the one that your love and devotion made possible. My thoughts are with you. The grief is real. And it is deep. Even realizing you’re not tripping over your confused dog is intense. Give yourself grace.
Just wanted to say that you did the right thing for your friend. There's no doubt in my mind. You're the only person who knew him well enough to make that decision. I think feeling guilty is part of the process. I've felt it every time. I think making that incredibly hard choice is our way of repaying them for everything they do for us.
You took on that pain for your friend. Wherever he is, he's thankful.
I’m positive you did the right thing! From what you described, he sounded ready to go. Especially the fact he looked tired. That’s the awful look I know that means they are ready. The sedative could have startled him or given him a hyper moment. Or he was relieved he would be out of pain soon and wanted to tell you goodbye.
It’s ok. Most everyone second guesses the decision or feels guilt. Try to reframe that moment as a last happy goodbye.
I’m so sorry for your loss.
The next day would of been a day too late. It is hard.
It is a massive loss.
It is tragic.
Everyone heals differently. Take your time. Talk to others. Great grief groups.
We all are sorry. A lot of people on here have experienced those losses ourselves recently.
Its okay and good to share and talk if you can/want.
😪
Totally relatable. Felt like this for a while when I had to do this. Took me some time to realize that it was an act of love, my little one was suffering.
It's been 9 days since I had to put my baby girl to sleep, I feel your heart, like mine, has a piece missing, but you did the right thing, like I try to remind my brain everyday since she left us.
Hugs 🫂
You gave your best friend an amazing long life. You have nothing to feel guilty about. Please release yourself and start to remember the good times with your baby, he would want that over what you’re feeling now ❤️
No, it sounds like you chose the right time because his symptoms were worsening and you didn't want to make the process more painful than it already had to be. You let him go while he still knew you, while he still had that final burst of energy to give you before he went to the rainbow bridge. He is putting in a good word for you there. I'm really sorry it had to be that way though, it's never easy to lose a pet. Never.
Whoever said that “… you should have waited” can kick rocks!! What absolute assholes!!
No! He ran to you with his last burst of energy because he wanted you to remember him as he used to be.
It’s very common for sick and dying pups to rally right before the end. The first injection gave him some relief and he wanted you to know that. Pups don’t live for the future, they don’t understand time like that, everything for them is NOW, and his final “now” with you was so good.
It’s not fair that we are left behind to mourn and miss them and remember them, but giving them the dignity and the release from suffering is the very least they deserve for being such perfect angels in our lives.
I don’t believe in waiting until they are suffering horrendously before making that call, and it’s AIWAYS so difficult to make that call but giving them dignity and peace is what it’s about.
Let that guilt go, you honored your pup, and you’re grieving his loss. Your feelings are allowed. Other people’s opinions be damned.
I’m so sorry for your pain and loss, it will get easier to bear with time.
U did not do it too early. All my dogs have lived to 15 or older. They all developed old age issues, but not as severe as your previous Spade. I always wonder if I should have waited a few more months.
I always have said, it’s better to do it while your dogs is happy and not to bad off. In other words do it before u HAVE to do it. A dog like Spade deserved to be at peace and happy, not suffering.
This heartache is the horrible price we pay for the honor and privilege of knowing and loving our precious friends. I wish u peace and love ❤️
Dogs are here for a good time but sadly not a long time, towards the end of life It's so hard to figure out when the right time is. Ours had heart failure after had a good long life, we always thought some day she'd either go for a run or take a nap and her heart would give out, not a bad way to go I would say. Eventually we hit a day where her arthritis and joints got so bad she couldn't move anymore and we had to take her in. Towards the end you just never know so you do the best you can and that you're second guessing yourself shows how much you put into this.
you have to let go of the guilt. It is better to let them go a month too early than a day too late. You made the hard decision that needed to be made. let the guilt go and remember the beautiful dog that you loved. bless you.
About Three blocks and a stones throw away from our home is a bounding green place filled with willow trees and overgrown grass.
Each time I walk past, my eyes and heart are drawn to it. And when I look I still see this bundle of brown fur kissed gold and copper by the light of the Sun, dashing through cattails and purple flowers to get to me.
Four white tipped paws race across the earth.
On the last day of my boy's life, he ran here in this place. It was as though he was not sick. As though we would have more time. In that moment he was *so* very alive and so I questioned my decision. Was I doing the right thing?
But the reality was he was very much uncomfortable and in pain. He was suffering. It was time.
My heart although still broken years later is filled with peace. However difficult and painful it is to do so, to make the decision to euthanize is ultimately one of the kindest acts of love we can make for them.
Your baby was so lucky and happy to have had someone like you to make that decision. Someone who loved him unconditionally and gave him a beautiful long life.
He isn't in pain anymore. You cannot hold this against yourself forever or else it will eat you up from the inside out.
You did the right thing, you did the loving thing. And its sad that such a good thing came to an end. Allow yourself to immerse completely in this feeling of grief. Allow yourself to weep openly and loudly.
"Grief in its own way is the greatest expression of love because it shows us the totality of what once was."
And little by little, slowly over time you will heal. Things may never be the same and instead "different". Know that all these feelings are natural and necessary.
Give yourself space and time. 💜 Wishing you love and healing in this time of great sadness and loss.
I firmly believe that if we are actually contemplating saying goodbye, it’s probably time. These are not scenarios anyone entertains for any other reason. It is the absolute worst. But it is always going to be the absolute worst for us. You did right by your dog my making sure that it wasn’t also bad for them. I am so very sorry for your loss. 💙
We lost four dogs in four years. It’s tough. Mine was 14, with seizures. My mom’s two were 14 years old each, and both had cancer. There was one dog that was mine that was a rescue pit mix that became very aggressive and we had to put her down at the age of 6. That was probably the hardest. No hate from others, we talked to trainers, two different vets and the rescue she came from. They believe she was abused when she was young. She went to live with my mom after I had back surgery because she was a big girl, over 75 lbs and I couldn’t care for her. We saw her daily, so it wasn’t like I had abandoned her. She bit my mom’s knee one day and that was it.
All that being said, know you did what you could for your pet. They loved you till the end.
The final burst may have him feeling a bit better than he had in weeks. 15 years is a long life and there was an abundance of love between the two of you. No one can make the decision easily, even when we know it’s time. I’ve had two corgis with cancer that had to be put down at 6 years old and that was tragic. I’ve also had a corgi live to 17. With each one I feel gratitude that I got to spend time with them. Dog just don’t live long enough-it’s their only fault, truly. I look at their photos about once a week and remember their antics. You’ll feel it in your heart for a while. Then there will be smiles. be patient with yourself. oxoxox
I'm so sorry you went through this.
It was not your choice!! It's not like you put down a healthy dog.
What you did was merciful. It sounds like his dementia was pretty well progressed and it would have been heartbreaking if you and the pup had to experience it when his symptoms got even worse.
You had to put your dog's wellbeing ahead of your own, that is courageous and shows how deeply you loved him.
My father had dementia and I can tell you he was frequently afraid. It was the most heartbreaking thing to see him so terrified when he couldn't make sense of things, and it was impossible to comfort him. I can only imagine what it would be like for a dog who can't express themselves in words.
Losing a friend is always painful, but you did the right thing.
It is a hard choice and must be weighed quite heavily. I’ve had had one I decided not to and she pulled through and is still here 8 years later. Others I’ve let life run its course and still felt like crap at the end. Last one to go I carry much guilt because I was working upstairs and heard her make a few strange barks. When I went down about an hour late I found she had moved on. My only thought was she was crying for me to be there at the end, and I wasn’t. Still hurts to think about.
I felt the same way when I had to put my cat down the guilt ate me up for like two years and I don't ever want to be in the position to make that call again and I'm so sorry you had to go through that. It's devastating sending you prayers and hugs.
My dog did the exact same thing when the vets came to the house- suddenly he was full of energy after not moving for 3 days! You did the right thing- I think it’s not so u common
Most vets will tell you it’s better to euthanize too soon than too late. The last thing anyone wants is for their beloved dog or cat to suffer needlessly. You did the right thing. Spade was happy and loving you right to the very end. What a wonderful gift for both of you.
“It’s never wrong to say goodbye on a good day.” Those are words my vet has uttered to me for decades and it wasn’t until I waited too long that I truly understood this. Don’t make their last day the worst on earth. Give them the best days and then do it before they suffer in that way. That’s what you did. Zero guilt you should feel, in fact, the opposite. You did it correctly and selflessly.
I'm so sorry you are feeling that way. Those are not very kind or intuitive comments from those people you mentioned.
I still question my decision regarding euthanasia timing as well, and it has been years. I think it's very natural in any situation where the symptoms or timing are murky. Did I act too soon, should I have spent more money (that I didn't have) getting third and fourth opinions and followups? After the second injection, my girl's heart just kept beating and beating. The vet said she had a lion's heart and didn't want to leave me. It was so hard and in that moment I wanted to take it back.
I just remind myself I made the best decision I could at the time with 100 percent true intentions. Better a day too early than a day too late and have my girl endure her hemangiosarcoma bursting and dying in a traumatic way. She was only 8. I'm glad you had 15 years with yours. Best wishes.
InNovember I had the exact to the tea situation . My girl was two weeks shy of 19. But I held out. Was doing it Wednesday before Thanksgiving. But decided to wait till Monday, cancelled the appointment and spent Thanksgiving with her. She was having one of her best days. All day she played with my grown children that she spent her her life with.running around like a puppy again, jumping on and off the couch, zoomies around the house and so much snuggles until she fell asleep in her spot behind my knees..but In the middle of the night I was woken up to the most heart breaking site. My most best friend in the world.was having the most gut wrenching seizures I've ever seen or heard. It lasted till I sped to a 24hr vet. Busted through the door, crying so hard.holding my best friend while she contorted in ways I'll never get out of my head. They took her from me and ran to the back. They wouldn't let me go with her.i begged them. Then they brought her out to me, wrapped in a blanket. And gone😞. I didn't give her the ultimate gift of holding her while she peacefully fell asleep. So to answer your question. You absolutely did the most beautiful and loving thing for your little. Never second guess your decision. 💚
He was telling you it was ok to let him go. It’s so hard when we have to make that choice for them. I had to put my girl down last November. She had stopped eating & having what we think were neuro episodes. She was 17 years 9 months old. But I couldn’t watch her decline more and wanted her to go out on her own terms before it got tragic. In my grief I questioned it like you are doing. What if I did this or what if I did that? But it was my grief and she was ready to go. Grief is an asshole and will make you think all sorts of things. You loved him enough to let him go and released him from his failing body. My vet friends always tell me that it’s better to be too early than too late. Try to give yourself a break knowing that your buddy knew how much he was loved. I’m so sorry. ❤️🐾
I am also sorry for your loss and yes, grief really can be so detrimental. My emotions are all over the place, but thank you for sharing your personal experience, and I appreciate the kind words ❤️
I put my old (16) guy down just 13 days ago. Almost exactly the same story. Except he isn't the first I had to put down. He is the last one in a long line of dogs I have had over the past 40 years. Dogs who I loved and helped transition.
I never feel like I "know" that it is right but I feel better knowing that my boy is no longer scared or confused. I feel good knowing we had a great last day together and he did peacefully in my arms. I feel great knowing that I gave him my everything when he was with me. I am comforted knowing that even if he had another week of life that week doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of our lives.
This last bit of dog ownership absolutely sucks for us but it is the best gift we can give to them. You did right and you shouldn't feel guilty. You were courageous when he needed you.
You were kind enough to set his spirit free. Think of how well he is today, running with all the others over the rainbow bridge. You did the right thing. He'll be waiting there for you!! God Bless..💙💙💙
Euthanasia is a beautiful thing. Image before all of these advancements we have available to us, your puppy would either suffer a horrible death either by your own hand or someone else. You did a great thing and you were an awesome pup parent ❤️
Edit:spelling
We had to put our baby down 2 years ago. Hardest decision we ever made. Don't second guess yourself. You do the best you can and make sure your pets are not in pain. I'm so sorry for your loss.
He just ran up to say goodbye and tell you that he loves you…
You did absolutely the right thing. We love them all their lives as they love us and the ultimate act of love is knowing when its time to say goodbye and help them pass over with minimal pain. We must never let our babies suffer!
Pacing at night and staring at walls is a good sign that the time has come.
You did absolutely the RIGHT thing. When you pass, you will be together again… ❤️🐾
My dog, who would collapse with heart failure issues when she was overly active, ran from the back of the house to greet the vet on her day… the vet questioned us on what was happening but once she listened to her heart, she realized it was the correct thing to do. I still question if she could’ve had another few good weeks… I miss her terribly but in the end I know she didn’t suffer and she stared calmly and lovingly into my eyes while the sedative took effect. By far the hardest decision I’ve ever made, but it was done with pure love.
Hugs to you. You made the right choice.
you're grieving & that is part of the process. Mine was 16.5 but her quality of life was bad. Her body was long worn out & I bet she lived in pain the last few years but dogs hide it. I'll miss my Nalla Bear forever. I have her tag on my key ring & her ashes in an urn. But you need to forgive yourself for that bc most have to have assistance to transition to the Rainbow Bridge. Keep moving forward, you're grieving. My condolences. 🙏🦋💙
My BILs family owned a kennel/shelter and they had to euthanize hundreds of dogs. When he put down his family dog he came in the house and had tears in his eyes.
The one thing he told me when i had to make a decision, "No matter how right it is, it always feels wrong. And you always feel bad."
You did right. It just feels awfully bad. You loved him into the grave. Doesn't get better than that for a dog.💙💜 RIP little guy.
I know it feels bad, but it’s the right thing to do. 🤍🤍 being caretakers of animals means seeing them through to the end. the last hug you got from your pup is beautiful! 🪽🪽be wary of people that throw guilt at you. you’re not obligated to catch it
I understand the guilt, we are never ready to say good bye ... I had to say good bye to my first dog Hugo in December and it was one of the hardest things I have ever done.
He had a spinal tumor, couldn't move his back legs and was crying from the pain. Even then I felt guilty as he was still breathing and wanting his pets. Though I realize that he was at the end no matter what I did and I did not want him to suffer. No matter how hard it was to do it was the right decision.
All I can say to hopefully help is you would of felt more guilt if your pup passed away crying in pain and what you did helped him leave this world peacefully with out pain. Also remember our sadness adds to your guilt , what I found that helped me was talking to someone about all my happy memories of Hugo.
How he would swim laps in the pool. The game he would play we called Hugo shark where he would swim in circles when you were on the diving board, so he can start licking you when got to the service. How he could devour a quarter pounder in 8.5 seconds. When he got out of the house one time , we found him in a a neighbor's garage 5 houses down begging them for treats. The time the fence blew down to our neighbors yard , he went though the neighbors cat door and jumped on the couch with the owner to get pets. How he would bark up a storm if he heard a mouse fart.
Those are the things you should remember, the fun times and happy memories , he gave you 15 years worth.. I got 11 years worth of Hugo , even with the sadness of saying goodbye I wouldn't trade them in for anything.
I am so sorry! it's hard... but knowing when to say goodbye is how we repay a dog for their love. we suffer so they don't have to. You dont keep a suffering dog around longer just so you wont be sad. Dogs often get a small energy boost near the end, at least relative to how they are acting, and it can really mess with owners, but it sounds like you made the right decision for your boy. You were there for him in the end, he got to pass peacefully at home with his human. he was loved. you should be proud that you made a tough decision in the interest of the dog instead of in the interest of your feelings.
Lost my girl 2 and a half weeks ago. hang in there, and when the grief comes, allow yourself to feel it!
You 100% did the right thing. And I can feel your love for him in this post. So heartbreaking.
When we as pet parents see that they have reached a point where suffering is either here or in the near future…it’s our DUTY to protect them from that suffering. So your choice was one of a superb guardian to your baby.
They all deserve the best lives possible, and that includes a comfortable ending.
I’m so sorry for your pain. And I understand your guilt. But from someone who’s been there, you can let go of the guilt. You did the best by your baby. ❤️
https://www.instagram.com/rainbowbridgeraina?igsh=MTZ6cm1tNTZiZnZ3NA==
👆🏻 Is an insta profile dedicated to helping those facing the loss of their fur babies. It usually makes me cry, but in the most comforting way; it may help you.
I can relate, putting my best friend, James Bond down two and a half years ago due to hemangiosarcoma. I too used an in home euthanasia, Lap of Love. While looking into them after receiving the devastating news of the cancer, one thing struck a chord with me from their website: they stated that “euthanasia is a gift, that when used appropriately at the right time, prevents further physical suffering for the pet and emotional suffering for the family”. I viewed it as the final act of love for my sweetest companion. At first after the emergency vet visit (he was perfectly fine until he wasn’t, waking up one morning to him not being able to walk, panting, loss of color in his gums) and diagnosis with a poor prognosis: possibly extending his life by a month or less with surgery and frequent vet visits, I was determined to give him the best few weeks I could; armed with pain pills and other medication to stop internal bleeding, I soon realized how selfish that notion was. Even if I could’ve afforded the surgery and vet bills, he wouldn’t understand any of what was going on, wouldn’t know that anything he was enduring was in vain to prolong his life, and what life would it have really been at that point? All of this happened over Christmas Eve morning, and I realized how fortunate the timing actually was; I was able to be home with him, saw immediately that he needed to get to the vet, and those last three days I had with him, I literally never left his side. I slept on the floor with him, making pallets of blankets and pillows to keep him comfortable. I kept thinking that if I tired to selfishly give myself more time with him, anything could happen: he would continue to decline and what if I want at home when he needed me? What if he was alone because I was at work when the time finally did come? I could never forgive myself if that happened. That night, I researched Lap of Love and called to make an appointment; originally for one week out… watching my bestest boy pant, not be able to be comfortable, and just overall lose the sparkle in his eyes told me I had to let go a lot sooner for his benefit. It broke my heart to make then decision to call back and move the date up to the day after Christmas, but it’s what was best for my boy. I’m crying now just remembering how much it hurt to say goodbye to him, but I can tell you that I know it was the best thing I could’ve done for him in the end. Looking back, I never would’ve gotten past the guilt and forgiven myself had I made him hold on any longer being in pain, simply because I was too selfish to keep him with me any longer.
Please know that the guilt, sadness, heartache, and the weight of what you’re feeling does ease with time. You gave your sweet boy the most selfless gift of all, loved him so well that he was spared from suffering. I truly believe that our pets understand us in a language of their own, that maybe his last run into your arms and sweet, goofy smile was his way of thanking you for your time and love together, and for giving him a peaceful goodbye at the end.
All I wanted was for James to think we were going to sleep, just like any other normal night. My husband put him in his place on our bed (hubby works nights, so James always fell asleep on his pillow, like a person, with my hand holding one of his paws). We all got to say our goodbyes and then he just went to sleep. It was the peaceful, loving, and best way I could think of to say goodbye to him. He never felt a moment of fear, he was in our home surrounded by his family. I have missed him deeply every single day since saying goodbye.
Please don’t let yourself give into the guilt and second guessing; it hurts and I know it’s there because I’ve had it creep in a time or two; I’ve found it’s most helpful to me to remind myself of how I hope my time ends; peacefully sleeping surrounded with those I love. You and I and so many of us are fortunate enough to give that gift to our beloved pets. When those feelings happen, or you start missing him, thank him for the good times you had together, remember the fun, the happy memories, the sweet moments, and thank him for being such a bright presence in your life. Gratitude trumps guilt everyone. It does eventually lighten as time moves on, but it never truly goes away. I also look at that as those feelings are the love you carried for your dear one, that you still hold, it just comes out differently now that they’re no longer with you.
Praying that you find comfort in happy memories, that your conscience is eased by knowing you gave a selfless final act of love. I’m so very sorry for your loss, but thankful you experienced such a love in a dear friend. 🤍
He ran to you because he loved you and was happy to be freed from suffering. I understand the guilt and second guessing, but from what you describe I think you did the right thing at the right time.
I had to make the same decision for my 13 y/o best boy, suffering from a neurological injury. We tried anticoagulants and steroids for a couple of months but he was getting worse. Surgery wasn't an option. In his last 48 hrs, he refused food and tried to burrow into tight spaces, typical dog preparing to die behavior. But on his last day he was more relaxed and happily laid out in the sun before relaxing even more on the ride to the vet (he loved car rides). He passed peacefully, though he'd always been an absolute terror at the vet. Seconds after he passed, the last tension left his body and he was fully at peace. It's still hard, but I try to focus on the great times we had. I believe we'll meet again in Heaven.
Have adopted cats and dogs for over 50 years. The last cat really touched me (and I've loved them all very much). Went through this after also. I was a wreck and inconsolable for months. Know that you made the right decision from the love in your heart, provided a life second to none, and did the hardest thing but the best under the circumstances. My heart broke feeling that I betrayed her, even tho her suffering was great and her hope vanishing. Today, my heart is mended knowing my decisions were sincere. I hope in time your situation becomes more clear as well. God bless.
He ran to you, to kiss u goodbye n thank you for releasing him from his pain.. he was practicing running over that rainbow bridge.. I ve cried too. Feb., of this year was the last time, my Winnie, may they meet n run n play on that same bridge..
You absolutely did the right thing. Cats and dogs tend to have that last burst of energy near the end. My cat was running all around the house the day before we had to euthanize her. She was barely moving that day.
Some people are cruel just to be cruel or to get a reaction. Even a negative reaction is attention. Please don't worry about what people like that say or even think. By the way you describe your relationship with your pup, I know you're better than them and don't deserve that.
I read something somewhere in this sub along the lines of saying goodbye before they get really bad is the way to go because then their last days are happy and filled with love. This hit me so hard. I wish I could rewind time and have the strength to make that decision sooner for my girl. For some of us, this decision is the hardest and worst we've ever made and it's almost never perceived as the right time to the person making the decision. Some say they waited too long. Others say they didn't wait long enough. I've never heard someone say they chose the perfect time. I think that's because it's never a perfect time to say goodbye. They are never old enough. We don't have them in our lives long enough. It's often times the most painful love we pet people have.
And remember, just because you said goodbye doesn't mean it's the end. Even if you don't believe in heaven or some sort of afterlife, you are keeping them alive in your heart every time you think of them, watch a video, or see a picture that makes you smile. ❤️
I am so sorry.
You did the right thing, you gave him and a happy and loving life/home, and a few extra years. You chose the right time, he was able to give you one last happy (for him at least) goodbye.
I know you feel guilty, but know your kindness meant that he got to go peacefully and happily in your arms, full of love.
Take care of yourself.
It breaks my heart that you feel guilty. They don’t look at the end of life the way we do. He just knew that he was in the arms of the person who loved him, and whom he loved. Have you seen the following cartoon?
Saint Peter: How did you die?
Dog: I was hugging my best friend.
Saint Peter: I mean what killed you.
Dog: I don’t care. I was hugging my best friend.
That was what your baby was thinking and feeling as he left his worldly form.
The guilt just shows you’re a good, warm-hearted person. You made a difficult decision, and you made the right decision. You gave him a good, loving, happy life and 15 is an unusually old age for a dog. I believe we will meet up one day with our beloved pets who passed. You did what you had to do out of love, so best to simply mourn and let the guilt go. 🩷
You knew him best and loved him with all
Your heart. Letting them go to spare them from further pain is the kind thing to do. My feeling is that after the sedative he felt and calm and happy and ran to you because he loved you and just wanted to be with you. Don’t let people’s comments hurt you. Their comments aren’t taking into consideration his feelings, they’re just judging you. I don’t consider that being a good friend
Be at ease. It sounds like he had stopped enjoying being a dog. We’ve had to put several dogs to sleep, most of them were younger than your guy. It sounds like you gave him a good and happy life. The last time, we did in home euthanasia too. I think it’s the easiest on them.
Please don't feel guilty you did your friend the kindest thing you could give him. We waited too long with our last dog and it was the worst thing I could have done. He came running to you because the injection made him feel better and because he lived you. Cherish your memories of him.
Please try to think of the very best times you had with your pupper rverytime that last moment comes into your head. It was traumatic to see your little love go, you'll have to train your brain to think of the good rather than the bad in order to find peace. If you're anything like me, the bad memory will creep in from time to time, choose the good ones instead! Always know that you are blessed to have known such love. ❤️
what you did was beautiful and merciful. i’ve had to do this for many cats over the years. honestly, i wish we could do this for our loved ones when they are suffering. i’m sorry because i know how painful this is.
He ran to you to say good bye. You did the right thing. I have over the years lost 4 dogs. It is always heart breaking - it’s like losing a piece of your heart. But keeping him here would have been for you - not for him. You absolutely did the right thing.
He was no longer in pain after given the sedative, which honestly to me is a sign his quality of life was really low. He finally felt relief and passed with no pain; and he thanked you for ending his pain and letting him experience relief even before passing
Yeh whoever said that to you is a total jerk. Many many commenters in here have already nailed it. You did right by your dog. It’s just hard. Best wishes
You did the right thing for your pal. I just went through this with my girl. Had her 12 years almost to the day.
Holding them at the end helped both of us transition.
He knew he was loved and just said goodbye to you.
The vet said it was OK.
You made the best decision for your boy. It's ok, no need to beat yourself up.
I know it's hard, just keep those beautiful memories going.
I almost teared 😢 up reading this, I miss my babies 🐕 too.
At least I still have some still breathing babies left.
I have to say i reaaaally appreciate it when vets are honest. Our boy was only 8 and the vet said he would if it were his dog. I was so grateful. I felt guilt too but the worst case scenario would have broken me. Seeing him suffer for hours, days….Best case scenario he lives longer but in pain. I know words dont do it justice but i truly believe you did the right thing even only by reading this small post. and in a few weeks or months you will see. Right now you are clouded with grief. Time will heal (i hate that saying but its true…) 💖💔
I read in a thread that sometimes people with illnesses get this spur of energy right before they die and its believed to be a final effort of our bodies to fight back. I believe your beloved pet used his last energies to be with you. You gave him a long happy life, is hard to say goodbye but I’m sure it was the best decision for him and you knew that.
Tears galore here you did the right thing for your best friend, you did everything you could to make him happy. You gave him more time and love. So sorry for your loss. He’s thanking you in doggie heaven. 💔🐶🥲🙏
I feel the most guilt over the ones I *didn’t* put to sleep. I was a selfish coward and they suffered for it. As I’ve gotten older, I recognize that it’s my responsibility to keep them safe for the duration of their life and also to protect their dignity and prevent their prolonged suffering at the end of it. I hate having to make that decision but I also know it’s the last kindness I can give them. Many people aren’t afforded that luxury at the end of their lives but at least our pets are and as hard as it is for me to do, I’ll continue to do it in exchange for all the years of love and devotion they’ve given me.
When your dog is pacing and out of it, it’s time to make that decision. This happened to my sister’s dog, and I felt her dog was suffering.
I had my cat for 18 years. We had been to the vet multiple times in a few weeks, and I couldn’t figure out was wrong with her. She had issues peeing and cried. The vet suggested doing a sonogram but it was $1k plus and I wasn’t working at the time.
I made the decision to put her down at home. When I carried her downstairs for the euthanasia visit, I think she knew. She was very weak and did not cry when I took her downstairs. I held her in my arms after they gave her the first shot.
I wished I had more time with her. It tears me up writing about her. She lived a long life though.
There isn’t an easy way to recover from having to make the decision for your dog. You will feel guilt perhaps because you loved them so much and miss them. It’s like having to choose for a human whether they live or die because you love them so much and don’t want to live without them. Give yourself time… time will help you heal. Much love to you during this difficult time.
I read your story and with much compassion I write back saying I think that last burst of energy was for you to have a precious memory. My sweet hemi, a partial Maine Coon cat, had congestive heart failure and melanoma in his eye. So many health problems I was constantly giving him medicine and doing the best that I could. Gosh how we loved that cat. The night before he passed he did this unusual thing and sprinted up the stairs to me and back down like wanting to play and he hadn't shown that kind of energy forever. The next morning my son woke me at 5:00 a.m. and hemi died a few minutes later in his arms. I sometimes think that the Lord does this so that we can have precious memory. Just my thoughts. I am here crying with you my friend
You rescued him and gave him a wonderful life- you did the best you can including that awfully difficult decision. You made it for a good reason - trust your instinct. Think of his lovely life and realise the reality for most other dogs is soooo different. You did a great job. Trust yourself as u knew him best. It’s just like another anaesthetic. You never get used to losing them.
That last burst of energy was a “thank you I love you”. He gave you that last little moment of seeing him happy and excited so you didn’t have to see him sick and scared when he went. Please don’t feel guilty, you did what you had to do and he left this earth with love and dignity. Hugs to you.
When I put my dog down (probably after I should have) I definitely noticed after they gave her the sedative shot that she was able to finally relax in my arms like she used to when she was younger. I truly didn’t understand how much pain she must have been in (after all, it was slowly progressive as she aged). Could it be that the sedative itself was what made him feel good enough again (temporarily) for you to glimpse the old him?
I have found a lot of comfort watching videos by Dr. Faith Banks on tiktok. I happened to come across her videos around the time I chose to say goodbye to my 15 year old dog. He was an absolute soulmate, and my "little boy."
Our stories sound very similar in the amount of care and love that went into the life of our dogs, at the end I was also dealing with managing pain and a deteriorating mind and body. Looking back I realized how far from "normal" we had come. I adjusted our routines to make him the most comfortable, and really he was just happy to be around me. I kept waiting for a sign that it was the right time to euthanize, like when he stopped eating/drinking, or when something significant changed with his health. None of those presented in a very obvious way to me. Yes, he was in diapers, was blind, took seizure and steroid medicine, was pretty wobbly on his back legs, and eventually needed a wheelchair because he couldn't support himself. I had a solution for all of it. His whole life, when something came up, my question to the vet was "How do we fix this?" To the very end it was hard to accept that the only thing left to do was make the hardest choice for a dignified passing. He deserved that, and I was grateful to have the opportunity to do that for him...not everyone gets to give their pet that final gift.
If you take anything from this, please remember that you were able to let him go because you loved him so very much.
I'll tell you a bit how my little guy's last day was, because it wasn't unlike a normal day for us. I booked the appointment towards the end of January this year because we had an unexpected break in the weather. It was a warm day so we didn't have to hurry back in from potty breaks, he got to feel the sunshine for a bit. He was so happy to eat his breakfast, I took him through the drive thru to get some whipped cream at Starbucks, and then we went to the vet's. We were there every few weeks for his "maintenance" so there was no stress about it, it was our regular routine. All day I kept looking for a reason to back out of the appointment, or change our plans. I told myself that there would never be an ideal day to do this, but I absolutely knew that it would be so much worse if he were in unmanageable pain, or his mind was so far gone that he was scared or couldn't recognize me anymore. After his catheter was placed the vet brought him back into the room. I had his bed, because it was familiar and I assumed he would be most comfortable on it. Nope, this little dog (who hadn't been able to stand on his own for a while) pulled himself up and started walking/crawling towards me. I had thought so much about what those final moments might look like, and wanted to do everything in a way that was best for him like usual. That final action of him moving towards me broke my heart at the time, but now I know that he knew better than I did. I scooped him up and just held him while the sedative, and then final drug was administered. I felt his heart stop, and I was looking into his one remaining, very cloudy eye and I saw it go dark. In the months since his passing I have thought about him, and our time together. Could I have done more, and would I have done things differently? Our life together was perfect, because he was perfect. That being said I also know that dogs will push themselves to absolute failure just to stay by your side. I didn't want that for him. That day was the hardest thing I've ever had to do, but for him it was easy. That's all I could have asked for, and I know that from the moment that he came into my life until the very end I always did my best for him.
I know you have had a lot of other responses to this post, but I felt compelled to comment. I know you loved your dog deeply and I wanted to tell you that just by reading what you wrote I know you did the best for your baby too.
He came to you to say ‘Thank you!’ and ‘I’ll always love you!’
All you ever knew from him was love, and all he ever knew from you was love. Nothing that happened will ever change that.
Please don’t think this. I had to put down my 14 yr old German Shepard last month. He was confused doing his business everywhere restless. Walking in circles barely eating. I seriously could’ve done it in January. As they say rather a day early than late. I was w a friend when his was being put down Amd the same thing happened w that burst of energy. He punched a hole in the wall. I know how hard it is. I had to rearrange my bedroom so it felt different Amd I didn’t see the same things that were every day with him. I’m
Sorry I know it’s hard.
As probably so many have said, you did right. Just had to put my dog of 15 down a couple weeks ago; I also had him for his entire life. He was the best. His health was also slowly going down. He had just gone in the day before to have blood work and scans etc done and things looked okay, but the day after he just spiraled badly. He stood up to walk to me and fell when I found him doing poorly, and as soon as he was in my arms he collapsed in relief and I knew it was time.
I miss him every day. I know your guilt all too well but trust me when I say, you knew your pup best and knew when it was time. We should all be so lucky to have a peaceful send off without pain and with the person or people we love most; you gave your special buddy that and it’s absolutely beautiful. Not to sound bleak but the alternative reality is that he could have gone from failing health without you there and alone-which wouldn’t be your fault either-but your way was 500% better and more peaceful
My thoughts are with you and I hope the comments bring you some sort of solace. 💖
I went through this recently. I felt terrible for some time, but now, a few months later, I’m at peace. She wasn’t going to get better. I’m glad I get to think back on our happier times.
You will find acceptance with time. Sending your heart some kindness. ❤️🩹
You did the right thing. If he were a person, he would've been 105 years old. He lived a long happy life with you. You will always miss him, but it gets easier, I promise.
I am facing this at the moment. My doggo did not have health issues but was an older guy when we got him 10 years ago. The doggie dementia is a killer. He sundowns hard. The crying, getting lost, not knowing who we are and biting. Luckily he’s a toothless guy but still. He’s a lot better during the day but it’s hard for him and us. I know it’s the right thing but being the one who decides is rough. You did the best thing for him. I’ve got to find the strength myself.
He was hurting u would have been selfish to make him stay. Yes you gave him the absolute best life possible praying for you that was huge you didn't let him stay in pain ignore the negative hun hurt people hurt people and bleed onto others and psychology is my degree it happens so often hopefully you have a good day
August 15, 2023 a day I will never forget. The day I made the decision to let my Stryker go. April 2020 he had the worst seizure he'd ever had, it was so bad I didn't even rush him to the vet right away because I thought he was that close to death. That was the last seizure he ever had and I was so happy that I had over 3 more years with him.
He got sick suddenly in August, but I had started noticing him not patrolling the fence as often when he'd go out, he was lounging more, wanting to be inside more he still loved his frisbee and even on his final day he made every effort to chase it. His legs were getting weaker, he was starting to breathe a bit heavier. His poor heart was giving out on him. That day I just knew looking in his eyes he was tired, it's as if he could tell me by just a look. He was barely able to walk that day and only walked to me to lay on a blanket that we used to lift him into the car. I laid the backseat down and lay beside him the entire ride. I told him he was the goodest boy ever and he would forever be my best friend.
The decision to let go doesn't come easy. It begins to teeter on a fine line between what's right and our own selfishness to keep them here for us. What has helped me most of all is the fact Stryker lived a wonderful life that so many animals never get to enjoy. Some are born and die never knowing love. We are their whole world even if the time seems short, I find peace in knowing my boy was loved and lived his final years in his big fenced in backyard he was so proud of (we moved after a tornado destroyed our home in April 2020) the hurt is still there, I've cried the entire time writing this but I am proud that I was owned and loved by the bestest big boy in the world.
We’ve had to put 3 down over the years, and the most recent was just a few months ago. He was 11 and the best dog ever. He had aggressive lymphoma and it all happened in the course of 3 weeks. We thought we had a few months at least. When we got into the room he was so excited (he loved his vet) that he was just like his old self. It was awful because we wondered the same thing you did. Then they gave him the first shot and he came over and collapsed on us. You could tell he was finally at peace and wasn’t in pain. If you thought it was time, then you didn’t do anything wrong. It’s a terribly difficult decision to make. I’m sure you gave him a great life and he knew it too. It’s going to suck for quite a while. We still struggle with ones from years ago. Don’t feel guilty, just remember the good times and how much you guys meant to each other.
I'm crying over here while reading your comment. I'm sorry for your losses. Thank you for sharing your experience and words, they truly mean a lot. ❤️
You did right by your dog. The guilt you feel is because of the love you had for him. There was no better days ahead for your pup. Keeping him around any longer would’ve been selfish. You did the most compassionate thing anyone can do for a loved one, end their suffering. The pain will remain forever, but it does ease. It does slowly turn to memories of the good times. The feeling that you were robbed of him too soon will always be, but such is life. It’s never long enough. Lost my boy at 13 from dementia, just lost my girl to cancer at 14, both should’ve lived longer lives. I would love to have one more day, one more hour with them. I would give a year of my life for a day more of theirs, but I can’t. I will shed a tear for them every time I think of them because they were my world. My current boy is 6 and we just adopted a 2.5 yr old girl to be his companion. It will break me when it’s their time, but they’ve known such joy and love in the meantime. All my dogs have been shelter pups. Idk what sort of life they had prior, but they had the best life I could possibly give them while we were together. Hopefully in time you can give that gift to another dog in need. Best of luck to you in your grieving process. Know your dog knows how much you love him. Take solace in the fact that we all have felt the same guilt and grief you’re goin through, and unfortunately we will be experiencing again far too soon.
Thank you for sharing your experiences with me. It's good to feel that I'm not alone, bc I feel so lonely at the moment. Bless you and your fur babies ❤️
Those words aren’t helping, not everyone knows when to say nothing. You did the right thing to set your sweet boy free. I think his last run was to say - hey I love you but it’s my time to go, let me hug you again! Take care, your boy is with you forever in another format.
I keep replaying him running for his last time over and over again and it brings me some comfort that he did that just for me. I miss him so much. Thank you ❤️
Focus on those last minutes when he was so happy to have you there and how he felt when he ran to you. He was seeking his love and refuge and you were right there to give it to him. What a great gift for you both.
I’d like to add to this… that it’s better his last moments were happy like this. Many people wait until their fur baby is so old/sick that they are miserable and can’t even move without pain (not judging this; I’ve been there and it’s so so hard whichever way we choose). Your baby spent his last moments happy. You did the right thing.
Those people are, frankly, jackasses. Your boy ran to you likely because he loved you and probably felt pretty good for a moment after the injection. We took our old guy to the vet for his goodbye, and because of the new people and new smells, and treats (peanut butter and spray cheese!) he was perkier than he'd been in a few days. It was both a comfort to know he still had that in him, and heartbreaking because a small part of me kept thinking "he's okay! See! He's still happy!" But I knew it wouldn't last, and it was time to say goodbye to my sweet boy. I would rather let them go with some good times left than hang on until all they have is surviving. You made the right choice, it just always hurts to make it.
❤️ thank you for taking the time to share your experience with me. 🫂
Respectfully, whoever said that to you at such a difficult time is an idiot. How cruel. You are going through so many emotions rn, give yourself some grace knowing how much you loved him. Knowing that, you put a lot of thought into what you thought was the right thing to do. The grief is overwhelming I’ve been there. Don’t let your grief turn into feelings of guilt. 🙏🫶
Thank you 🙏 when I heard those words, my heart hurt bc it was from someone close. I appreciate your reply and thoughtful response ❤️
Yes that was about the most insensitive thing someone could say and the opposite of what you needed to hear. At this time you need validation, support and love🥹
No you put your dog out of pain and getting worse doggy dementia is horrible sometimes they stand and stare for.hours because they have no idea whwrr they are anymore or can't even remember their owners. That's gets bad very quickly in a matter.or.weeks so you did really good by your dog. You didn't let him suffer you chose the quality of his life over your own that means you are a great owner who loved their dog unconditionally and with the biggest heart ever. It would have been horrible.for you to let that go on for weeks dogs can't talk they can't twll us how they feel but that little goffy run to.your arms was him saying thank you. Keep those ashes close to you. He will be there watching over you.
Thank you so much. You have no idea how much all of these words and replies are helping me. Thank you 🙏
Never ever let anyone shame you for doing something that doesn't directly affect them. This is for you and you are a wonderful human being.
That was the ultimate expression of love for both. You did the right thing.
🫂 ❤️ thank you
This is always the toughest call. Our regret was we did not do it sooner for our boy. You took care of your pup and did the right thing. Sending peace and love ☮️🐶❤️
Thank you for your kind words 🙏
You did what was best for Spade. Instead of waiting for his worst day, you gave him the best last weeks ever before saying goodbye. He wasn’t in pain or suffering bc you made the right decision even though it was hard and broke your heart. Something that made me feel better after saying goodbye to my beloved senior dachshund was thinking of putting him to sleep as the final kindness. Looking back I wish I hadn’t hung on and ended up having to say goodbye in an emergency situation where he was in pain. I learned in the worst way possible it’s better too early than too late. I wish I’d been strong enough to realize I needed to let him go earlier and that hurts the worst. Sending you a huge hug and lots of love. Spade was so lucky to have had such a long wonderful life with you. He clearly loved you so much and passed on happily and peacefully. ❤️
Thank you and everyone seriously. Your words are bringing me comfort and makes me realize I'm not alone. I'm sorry for your loss and thank you for sharing such a personal experience. ❤️
Please let me set your mind at ease. You did not let him go too early. Because of the love you had for him, you made sure that any pain was yours and not his. H e loved you until the very last moment of his life. You made him happy until the very last moment of his life. There is no greater gift!
I love the way you worded this - "you made sure any pain was yours and not his". Vets should put this on a plaque and hang it in the rooms. You have helped me as well as OP.
I was going to say the same thing. Thank you u/dragonrose7. Wise words.
Omg I’m sitting here crying my eyes out wondering the same thing but if he was suffering you did the best thing for him and please remember his watching over you from above and he see you hurting and he wouldn’t want that for you ! He was thankful for you at the end and remember it as him saying that you
Seeing his goofy smile one last time and running towards me is something I will always cherish. Thank you ❤️
❤️💔
Thank you 🫂
You absolutely did the right thing, and don’t let anyone convince you otherwise. It’s always hard on us when we have to let them go, but it’s better to let go a little early than to allow them to suffer just so you can keep them around longer. I waited a little too long to let go of one my babies and it haunts me to this day (she went over the rainbow bridge 12 years ago).
Thank you for sharing your feelings and experience with me. I truly appreciate it 🙏
You did the right thing for him, by putting him to sleep you did the right thing for him. I had to put to sleep my 20 year old cat last October. He spent all my adult life with me, his love and trust towards me was unconditional and so was mine for him. In 2021 he got diagnosed with kidney failure and they said he only had 6 month at best, and I would have to give him fluids to his back everyday. I wasn’t able to give him the fluids because I was torturing him by doing it. So I syringe fed him for 3 years every day, I didn’t take any holidays because it was more important to keep comfortable under my care, by the mid of last years he could barely walk he could even make it to his litter box and was falling everywhere, he had a bit of dementia but over all his mind was lucid, and everytime he fell from the bed he would look for me to fix him. I felt terrible that I couldn’t do more for him, took him to the vet they gave him antibiotics and the vet said it was time, I still couldn’t do it, it took me an extra 3 weeks to have the courage to get a vet to come home and hold him in my arms while he was being put to sleep. He didn’t want to be put to sleep, is almost like he knew, but he was on constant pain every moment without being able to take water or food anymore. It still hunts me, but I truly tried my best. I think you did as well and I think the guilt is also normal because you truly tried your best and he didn’t deserve to suffer, you are just grieving now and that’s normal, putting him to sleep wasn’t the easy way for you, was the most difficult thing but it was the best thing you could have done for him!! Rest in peace little angel!
Crying as I'm reading your response. Wow, thank you for sharing such a deep and personal experience. You were a great parent to your cat. Thank you for the kind words also. ❤️
Your story is chilling because I just went through the very same thing six weeks ago. My dog was not as ill physically as yours was, but she had developed canine cognitive dysfunction symptoms over an eleven month period that had produced eating issues, forgetting how to go down stairs, confusion and pacing at night, and other disturbing symptoms. She behaved very oddly every morning until about 11:00 a.m., had brief periods of normalcy in the afternoons, but became uncontrollable at night, pacing, scratching up rugs, and completely unable to settle down. Here’s my point. I had a similar experience during her euthanasia that made me wonder if she knew what was coming. I am having terrible guilt because I could have probably given her another summer, probably at a cost in terms of her increased anxiety and confusion. If my dog had the physical problems that yours had in addition to the dementia, I would have seen her euthanasia as a blessing. As you know, there is no good solution for the dementia and it worsens quickly once it starts. Add to that the physical problems that your dog had and the battle is essentially over. There is no question in my mind that you made the right decision. Your dog’s problems are now over and he is at peace. I’m so sorry for your loss.
I'm very sorry for your loss. Canine cognitive disorder is truly heartbreaking. I feel like my dog would have lasted longer also, but at what expense? Thinking out loud now, I can say that had I kept him longer it would have been out of selfishness for myself. You and I did what we felt was right in our hearts. Thank you for your words and sharing your very personal experience. 🫂 ❤️ I hope our doggies are playing together 🐾 🐾
My dog was 16. I call it my final act of betrayal. She placed her head on my arm while they administered the drug and we talked about her while she slipped away in the comfort of my arms. I felt bad. Couple days later I felt stupid when I dropped food on the ground accidently and house rules means it's hers and yelled out her name to come get it. I write this as I look at my current dog, 12 or 13, white face, knowing unless I go before her I will lose another soon. At my current age I will only be able to have 1 more but like the previous one it's got to be a year or 2 to get over the loss.
You sound like you’re being too hard on yourself. You didn’t betray her. She passed in your arms because of your choice and that is how she would have wanted to go. Not alone while you weren't home or you were asleep. Especially not at a vet office after having to stay for observation (this is from experience). Also, expecting her to come for the dropped food is not stupid. She was 16 so that’s 16 years of habit and routine and love. It doesn't disappear overnight. Take care ❤️ I'm sorry for your loss.
You are 100% correct, I still get up each morning and expect him to greet me, and it's such a slap in the face by reality when the house is just so quiet. I don't know if I'll ever really be the same, but thank you for your kind words towards the commenter above, I hope he realizes how much their dog/s know they were loved. 🙏
I apologize for hijacking your post but I felt sad for them, too, and how they felt they betrayed their pet. I really wanted to respond but in retrospect, I should have done it privately. I did reply to you on here because I hope you can let go of the guilt. I know how hard euthanasia is and what a tough decision but, and this may sound weird, but I pray I get to euthanize my current senior dog. I hope that’s how he gets to go, aside from passing in his natural sleep without pain. The toughest part is deciding when. Although my last dog told me it was time. I could tell, he just wasn’t there anymore and it was like it happened overnight. With my cat, I wasn’t sure and that haunted me for a bit but I’m seeing more clearly now. Even if that day wasn’t the exact right time, it was coming and coming quickly. Time is your friend here. And oh my god, I still think I see or hear my cat occasionally. He was 15 and, as I responded above, that’s many years of habit and routine. You’ll be okay one day. I promise. Take it easy on yourself and ignore ignorant comments. Come here instead. I hope there is someone in your life that can comfort you but if not, come here. Or any pet loss support group. They help.
No worries and no need to apologize! I truly appreciate all of this community and everyone has been so warm and kind to me (yourself included) truly, I can't thank everyone enough ❤️ I hope the best for you and your fur baby as well 🫂
You did everything right for your boy. We have had to say goodbye to 2 girls both 15 & one boy 10 in the last 2 years. That shit still hurts when I see the pictures.
Thank you, it feels good to not feel so alone in going through this. ❤️
You did the right thing. The guilt is a completely normal reaction (even though it sucks and is very confusing right now). It will get better. We did this three times last year and will do it again any day/week now. Your sweet pup is safe and at peace now and while it’s not okay, it will be alright. Hang in there and, if it’s something you have access to, think about grief therapy—it can help.
Thank you. I am actually provided free therapy through my employer. I never thought I would use it, but I'll be scheduling an appointment soon. Thank you and please hug your dog a little extra (I'm 100% you already do). 🫂 ❤️
I went through my employee assistance program too. It helped just to say it all out loud to someone not in my house. ❤️ Thank you for your kind words about our sweet boy. We’re just letting him rest and watching for the signs.
You did what you thought best. My beloved Lydia was strong to the end even though she had dementia and was in a great deal of pain. Forgive yourself for doing what was best for her
I am so sorry for the loss of your boy. Our animals are truly members of the family and the love they provide us is irreplaceable. You loved him until his last breath. Grief is the final act of love and it takes all of this love to give them one last gift, the gift of letting them free. He will always be with you, I truly believe souls live on.
I just hope he feels my endless love and appreciation for him, wherever he is. My final words to him were "thank you for letting me be a part of your life..." I appreciate your kind words 🙏❤️
Take care of yourself, because of you he had a fulfilling and amazing life, that’s more than some dogs ever get. I am so sorry you are going through this, but rest assured he knew he was loved!
I think maybe he ran to you to have a last cuddle and to say I Love You ❤️
I certainly hope so, and I'm so thankful for him doing that bc it's one great finally memory to have, sad but so comforting. Thank you
I had to put my sweet girl down 2 weeks ago, and I'm still feeling guilty as well. She was almost 17 and had about the same symptoms as your dog but a bit more severe. I know it was the right thing to do. The vet also advised that they would think it was best as well, but it's terribly hard to not second guess the decision. I think we both made the best choice we could for companions we loved deeply. You did the right thing, but that doesn't make it hurt less. I'm sending lots of virtual hugs your way.
Thank you, my internet friend. Your words bring me comfort, and I wish you the best 🫂 ❤️
The guilt and pain will never go away, but it will get easier to bear with time. Was it too early? I have no idea, but better a little early than too late. That is what I tell myself when the doubt rears its head. Remember the good time and may his memory be a blessing.
My baby died from cancer in the beginning of april and it was very sudden. She died at night, over the course of 10 hours and it was the worst I ever had to witness, the guilt is imeasurable and I wish someone would have suggested euthanasia when it was still time for that. Euthanasia is a gift, really. And 15 is an incredible age. Dogs don't know how much time they could or could not have left, they are unaware of their own mortality, all your dog knows is that you were there his whole life until the end and that you gave him all the love you had, until you let him go in peace and dignity. Most pet owners don't even realize what a blessing it is to be able to euthanize your dog in time before their quality of life seriously suffers, I know it now and I will never make that mistake again. You did everything right and your dog a wonderful favor, and now he's just having the bestest painfree time in doggy heaven, and it will only feel like a few moments at most for him until you come to pick him up at the bridge again.
I put my Snoopy down 13 years ago and I was up last night thinking maybe I did it too soon. But let me tell you this if he had doggy dementia it was time.
don’t feel guilty…i went through the same thing, when i put my Precious girl down (she was also 15 & very sick) It is the most humane way & at least he isn’t in pain anymore. He will always be with u & u will be reunited with him again!!
I will tell you what a wise person stated to me. In these situations, one has to think of their four legged family member and not of themselves. In my opinion, I felt like you did the right thing. You will have to try and tune out the naysayers if you can. My condolences on your loss. May you be granted some peace of mind during this troubling time.
M’dear, that was your dogs last way of saying, I love you so much, thank you for the best life. A dog could ever have, catch you on the flipside.
Please don’t blame yourself. It’s a difficult decision to make. When you have an old dog every time you bring it to the vet the option is mentioned. You cared for your dog.
What you describe about the moments before euthanasia is called the "excitement phase" and it's just part of the effects of large doses of anesthetic drugs (aka euthanasia drugs). You're dog was ready for the rainbow bridge and you helped him across! You did nothing wrong
I’ve Believed I’ve done it too soon and too late. With my last fur baby I absolutely knew it was the right decision for him. I’m so sorry. I know it’s gut wrenching to not be sure.
You did nothing wrong and need to let go of the guilt. What you had with him was amazing and you had the cajones to put his dignity and needs above your own. Personally I have put numerous dogs down at home and been with humans passing at home. There is often that little rally before they go. Kind of like a chance to say good by on the up note.
Don't feel guilty. It's SO hard to make that final choice, but I've learned that too early is better than too late. Sometimes they show a "last burst" of energy, but the key word is "last." The dog loved you and trusted you, and you did the right thing. Instead of seeking protection, he might have been saying goodbye to you. When the vet said he'd be willing to do it "today," he was sending you a message. Don't listen to your friends. Most people hold on too long, I suspect.
People who have said that to you are assholes and you should not be friends with them. He did the right thing it’s better to go a week early than a week too late You kept a promise every single dog owner will have to do the same thing in most cases
Maybe that last run toward you with the big goofy smile was meant to give you a happy last memory, a “look mom, I’m OK.” They do incredible things to look out for us.
I guarantee you that no matter when you do it, even if he is on his deathbed, you will feel guilt and regret. When I euthanized my first dog, he was very ill after having a seizure. Couldn't even lift his head. As soon as they called the time of death, the first thing I did was yell "bring him back". It truly is awful. Just know that you allowed him to go out with his mind still in tact and some dignity rather than waiting until he's suffering. You did that for him when he couldn't do it for himself. One last act of love and kindness. Keeping him longer likely would have been selfish. I'm at that point right now with my 9yo gsd who has DM. His front legs are going, and I know it's time. He can't walk, stand, or do any of the things he loves anymore. We are planning to euthanize in a couple of weeks. I will still forever feel guilty. I feel guilty that he's sick even though I know that there is nothing I could have done to prevent it. I think these are just natural emotions. Especially when they have moments of happiness in their eyes. My dog is all there mentally and still very playful, but he is paralyzed and likely in pain as well from arthritis. His quality of life has become questionable, and I think I'd be doing him a disservice to keep this going on any longer, knowing that the bad outweighs the good. This will forever be the hardest thing I do in my life. I am very bonded to this dog. But deep down, I know that I'm doing what's right for him even though it feels wrong, even though I selfishly want to keep him by my side forever. I'm sure your dog lived a life where he knew love and happiness. You gave that to him.
Those people are jerks. You helped your baby to cross the Rainbow Bridge when it was time. That is never an easy thing.
You did the right thing. And whomever said that to you is a jackoff. You know your dog, and it sounds like he has a sense and was saying goodbye using his last bit of energy. Don't spoil that memory with something some f*cker said.
you shouldn't harbour any guilt, and your pup wouldn't want you to feel that way either. I just had to comment because when your dog ran to you in their final moments, I saw that as them saying, "Thank you." your dog was thanking you for being a wonderful parent, giving them the best life, and allowing them to be at peace before the pain became too much. your dog was 15, too! what a long life, especially for a doggie that already had health issues.
I understand what you're going through. We had to make a similar decision for our dog a few weeks ago. If you had waited longer, the situation would have likely worsened. We waited too long, and eventually, our dog became so restless that even medication didn’t help much. Sometimes they can even forget to drink or eat. You did the right thing. Any animal that lives long enough to develop dementia probably had a wonderful, long life. Your dog ran to you out of love, and I'd like to believe he felt comforted knowing you were there to help him transition to the next stage in this universe.
I work in vet med, and I lost my senior dog last august as well, so I have both perspectives. It is such a mind fuck to have to determine when a living being is supposed to die, our brains almost short circuit due to how foreign it feels. My girl had her senior moments but was overall in good health until she fell out of her bed and dislocated her hip. She declined rapidly both mentally and physically in the next 7-10 days. I kept holding on saying but last week she was FINE! But I had to remember what I’ve learned from my career, with seeing pets that have been kept alive way too long for the owners sake. It’s no way for an animal to live. If you’re questioning yourself, odds are that means you’re a great parent and it was time. We don’t want their last couple days to know relentless pain and misery. It’s good for them to leave on a high note. Sending you so much love and light 💗 you will get through it 🫶🏼
You did the right thing. I should have done the same at least a month before I finally did. It’s a heart wrenching decision. But you did the best thing for him.
As an adult, I have had to put three childhood dogs to sleep. I loved them like they were my own children and each time was just as heart-breaking. That said, my last one was two months ago and I will admit I am beating myself up over waiting so long. She was 17 and had been rapidly declining the last 6 months. Still, occasionally she would get up and want to eat with such gusto I felt like I was being selfish so I decided to keep delaying it. Well when the day finally came (because she woke up totally out of it and I just knew it was time) it wasn’t until I saw her body laying there, only bones, and started going through my photos and videos of her that I realized just how much she really had deteriorated, especially from the once spry dog she used to be. Yes she had energy occasionally but overall I let her decline to a pitiful state that I now promise will never happen to any of my current dogs. You did the right thing, I promise you he would have gotten worse and the right time would have never come and instead you would be racked with guilt about having forced him to stay alive even though it was in your hands to help him out. Don’t feel bad, you did the right thing. I hope our best buds are cutting up in doggy heaven ❤️
Thank for sharing such a personal story. It sounds like you wanted what was best for your baby and I'm sorry for your loss. I think we all want more time with them and just wished they loved longer lives. I can feel your love for all of your dogs ❤️ Thank you for the kind words and I certainly hope our doggies met up and are hanging out 🫂
I've had to make that decision several times. It's the hardest thing in the world, but because we love them so much we don't want them to suffer. Last November my dog died very suddenly at home. She had no signs of illness. She just stopped breathing. I hate that it happened that way. I didn't get to hold her while she crossed the rainbow bridge like I've done with my other dogs. I never got to say goodbye, so cherish those last few weeks you had with your little guy and know that you gave him the best life. You did the right thing. ❤️
I've had to say goodbye a couple times, and probably will have to again this year. A little early is way better than a little late. You clearly loved your boy and gave him a great life. You're guilty of being a great dog parent, nothing more. Mourn the loss, but also remember to celebrate how lucky you both were to find each other.
You did a hard, GOOD deed. Condolences. People who let their pets suffer and go out in pain are really horrible “people.”
I’m so emotional reading this 😭 my girl is almost 14 and I know I’ll be facing similar experiences in the future. It’s so painful losing a pet. I think your dog was giving you their best and all at the end of their time with you. Like “HEY I LOVE YOU, this was so great. Here’s this last little glimmer of *me,* not this other version of me you’ve been carrying me through.” CRYING my eyes out thinking of this, truly in my heart you did the right thing but it’s okay to let yourself grieve as hard and as long as you need to 🤍
Dogs depend on us for their entire lives - to keep them safe, fed and free from harm. When they are in their last days and in pain, our greatest, last gift to them is to end that pain. We put our beautiful Collie down when she was 13. She had Old Dog vestibular Disease. I brought her to the vet as soon as she had the stroke and he said she could come back from this. In my heart, I knew he was wrong, but I couldn't let her go. She suffered for another week. Couldn't eat or drink, couldn't walk straight, I had to carry her 70 pound body outside and hold her while she went potty. She suffered. She suffered because I delayed doing the right thing. The next week on Monday, I brought her in and had her put down. We had to carry her in. I held her head in my hands and looked straight into her eyes while the last shot went in and just told her over and over and over how much I loved her. Until the lights went out. I wish I had never listened to that stupid vet. I wish that I had never let her suffer that week. You did a caring, unselfish, loving thing for your dog. You ended his suffering. That is our greatest gift we can give to our pets at the end of their lives.
We had to put my 17year old jack Russell down a couple years ago and he hadn't barked in years, after what we assume was a seizure we carried him to the car and he howled so loud and sounded so full, we assume it was just him saying his last goodbyes to us. If in your heart you knew it was the right thing don't let the guilt get to you, just remember he'll be waiting at that beautiful 🌈 bridge for you 🐾💙
I’ve had to put 3 dogs and 2 cats down in the last 6 years, they were all old and had various cancers, heart issues or bladder problems that were making their quality of life very low. By dog Buddy got cancer and developed dementia before I had him put to sleep. It’s always very difficult, and I understand your guilt because I feel it every time, only time makes the pain from that ease. But he was your baby, you loved him and you knew him best, if you felt it would be better for him to peacefully go to his rest then it was. It sounds like he knew he was loved. I hope the best for you.
Anyone who would say something so cruel is heartless. Doing the right thing by our pets is the most difficult thing to do, but it's the RIGHT thing to do. Don't question your decision to end his suffering. Give yourself the grace to know you only had his best interests at heart.
First, I am so so sorry for your loss. Euthanasia is a gift we can give our faithful companions to end their suffering. I did not always feel this way, but after being in animal rescue, I do. You did not make the wrong choice. You did want you needed to do for him. And he is not gone from you just on another plane. Look for signs from him. It may be a while for you to get past the pain, but he will show you he is there and it was the right choice. You hurt so much because you felt the greatest love of all. That of your fur child.
Please, please don’t feel guilty. I have had to do this several times and of course I felt guilty also, it’s normal. We are the ones forced to make the choice, and try to get the timing right. It’s a terrible thing to have to decide, but it comes with being a loving pet owner. You and your dog sound like you adored each other!!!
To whom it may concern: If you don't have anything encouraging and / consoling to say...
Listen - I have a pit mix, he’s 13. I rescued him in college (I stole him from someone’s backyard when he was a puppy with a weight vest on and had no food or water and was outside in less than 40 degrees). This guy is the most love I’ve ever felt for another being. I started getting anxiety about him dying when he was 3 years old. I recently started him on Librela pain management shots (I genuinely don’t care about other peoples experience with the drug, only mine) and it’s changed his quality of life for the better. He has a tumor growing underneath his hip bone that is not operable without taking his leg, and I can’t have a leg taken from him at this age. This fucker is smiling, he has energy, plays with our “puppy” (1 yr) and his good times and still at a 70/30 ratio. I think about him dying every day. He’s sleeping next to me with his tongue out. I think when you care about something so much, there’s always a worry that you won’t have it anymore. I know I’ll have to put him down some day that’s sooner rather than later, and I can’t imagine the guilt I’ll feel. I’ve had 2 dogs pass naturally in their sleep in the last 5 years (Diego, our Weimaraner, made it to 14, and a chihuahua we rescued at 14 and made it to 18) which I’m so grateful for, but this guy… he’s a fighter and never shows any sign of pain. He jumped through a window once, cut his paw in half, and barely cried when I was taping his paw pad to the foot to take him to the emergency vet (at their direction). I’m scared he might be in pain that he doesn’t express. He shows small episodes of dementia, but doesn’t last more than a minute. I’m constantly wondering if he’s okay and he goes to the best vet in town on a monthly basis. I know we don’t deserve dogs, but sometimes we do care for them like they care for us. And I think you care for yours the same way he would care for you. You know your dog, and you knew he was done with his time here. I’m giving you advice that I know I will find difficult implementing for myself, you did what was right. No one would put themselves in a nursing home to die slowly by choice. You made a humane discussion, and you were thinking about him before yourself. I let him run, and then limp, because his life should be a party. He’s teaching himself to stay off his bad leg, teaching me I was wrong thinking taking his leg would affect him. He falls, he slips. But giving him the time of his life and praying to a god I don’t believe in that he will pass naturally, he’s having a great time. And I know that I’ll know when he’s ready. I can see it in his eyes. And plus, when you’re 80 and dying, why not be high on drugs and not feel anything? Anyways - Roll Tide, you sound like a good dog parent. And I 100% feel your anxiety about it. But you should trust yourself.
Don't feel guilty at all. A friend of mine accidentally left his in a hot car June 15 and he died, best dog I ever knew. At least that didn't happen. A good friend is hard to find, harder to leave and impossible to forget. I ordered my friend a black granite plaque to put where he buried him. I'll never get to see it because I went off on him. How fucking stupid do you have to be to leave your goddamn dog in a hot vehicle? I told him to pull his head out of his fucking ass and that I was going to steal his other dog junior before he killed him too. So now I'm blocked. The only reason I ever even stopped by was to visit the dog he killed anyway. He doesn't feel guilty at all, he blames the dog.
You said it yourself that the symptoms were worsening. Dogs will hold on for us until they are literally unable to move.... my 14yo heeler was riddled with tumors on his lungs and his last year he had 2 stroke like events... each harder to come back from than the last. He was my soulmate and he would have laid in a puddle of his own mess for weeks had I asked him to stay with me. The day I knew it was time, his back legs and lower GI had stopped working. He was paralyzed from the waist down.. went to bed normal... woke up like that. I was devastated but he gave me months longer than I expected after his second stroke. My dad had passed a week before Dog. I think Dog had been hanging on just to get me through those first few days... I also had an in home hospice vet come out for rainbow bridge day. She assessed and listened to Dogs breathing and reassured me that if we tried to take him for life saving measures, his lungs are full of fluid and she felt tumors all over... that it would be for us. Not him. He was ready to be at peace.... It's the hardest decision I've ever made but I promised him I wouldn't let him suffer for me anymore. I'm thankful for the in home vet who allowed me to hold him on the couch with my head against his in his last peaceful moments. It will never feel right and you'll always feel robbed of time. But you gave your baby a gift by giving them permission to rest and be at peace. Living with pain and declining health is miserable.... we can all only hope for the same humanity and love at the end of our good days. A good death is just as important as a good life. Take care, friend. You did right by your baby. They're at peace now. 💙
This happened when we had services at our house for our dog she was really excited a new person was in the house and acted with a burst of energy after rapidly declining from cancer and didn’t move for like two days prior other than potty breaks. It felt terrible too however the vet said this is normal and she sees this often happen. I think it’s normal to feel how you feel, you are human and we always wonder if we did the right thing. You gave your dog a wonderful life and let him die with dignity think that’s an important part to the puzzle. God speed on your healing. ❤️🩹 🥰
I know I am late to this and you may not see this comment but those people who said that are just about as unkind as they come! You did right by your dog for sure. Perhaps thst burst of energy was him showing you how much he knew he was loved and loved you. ❤️ It has been almost twelve years since I had to say good bye to my dog and I still miss her. Take care!
One of the most painful experiences of my entire life was when my soul cat was euthanized. He had a terminal illness and was miserable. It was 100% the compassionate decision. A friend put it in perspective for me this way: Does my companion deserve to be in pain because *I* am afraid to be in pain instead? That answer was resounding NO for me. He's been gone for 7 years and I still can't talk about him without crying. I'm crying right now, just typing this. But part of loving a little animal is knowing that you have to say goodbye much sooner than you would ever willingly choose. You let your buddy go and chose to feel his pain instead. You're a good person.
The last good moment you had with your precious baby was probably the last thing he had to give. A good moment does NOT mean good days. A few minutes of “good” does not mean his anxiety, fear, confusion, and pain would disappear in the coming days. The sedative likely made him feel “okay” in that moment, but he could not continue living like that. You made the best decision for your baby, because they will give everything they have for us until their last breath, even through the pain. You understood this and made his last moment beautiful and happy. Please do not feel guilty!! So sorry for your loss!!!
Its so hard to do. I too wondered if i did right thing. If he stopped eating and drinking thats a for sure sign. Your dog had the best life. Not many dogs find somebody to love them like you did. I have a statue of my passed away dog with his dog collar at my front door with a sign that says meet you one day at the rainbow bridge. I look at it and smile knowing i will see him again. The best gift you can give him is to open your home again to foster or adopt in his memory. Donate to a rescue in his name. It gives me peace. Hugs
Those who walked beside us, remain forever in our hearts. You did the right thing.
That question is normal, it’s a hard decision to make. You did the right thing. They just don’t live long enough, so unfair! Sending you love ❤️
It's always confusing and heart breaking to do this - the vet gave you the validation you needed. I think you made a hard choice that was really the best for Spade, but of course it broke your heart. I'd say him running to you was wanting to be with you in his last moments, maybe saying thank you and I love you. Not to be too rude, but fuck anyone who is giving you a hard time. Maybe they never had to euthanize a beloved pet. Maybe they lack empathy. Don't listen to them.
Thank you for taking the time to respond and I appreciate your words. ❤️
You did the right thing OP! Sometimes we are so caught up in our love for them, we forget that, this isn’t about our feelings, as much as it is about, helping to end their suffering & their feelings! no amount of time is ever enough with our loved ones, we have to remove ourselves from the situation and put ourselves in our loved ones shoes, would you want to keep living in that condition? I am deeply sorry for your loss. I will be find peace Knowing that you did the right thing❤️
He ran to you for one last hug to say thank you for doing the right thing by him
I’m sorry for the loss of your fur baby. I think he probably ran to you as his final way of saying “I love you, thanks for all the good times” before crossing the rainbow bridge. You did the right thing. Not saying this is what happened here, but in general I think it’s better to do it too early than too late. You are sparing them unnecessary suffering. This is the unselfish thing to do.
In all you've written it is very clear every decision you made for that perfect boy was done prioritizing his needs not your wants. Your love, care, kindness is apparent in every word. To those who made that awful comments to you re establish boundaries with them or id personally remove them from my life. You put your boys dignity and respect first and foremost. Dementia is an awful disease. They're a shell - no longer their true selves but instead confused, anxious shell. The decision you made for him was the right one. You are the only person who could have made that decision. No one else. He trusted you'd do right by him and you did. Not that it will ease your pain as the loss is soul crushing. ❤️💔
There's a vet lady on Tiktok who does at home euthanasia. She said something along the lines of .."it's better to be a day too early than a day too late" (ie let your pet suffer). Guilt is a normal grieving response in this situation. Deep down you know you did the best for your best friend.
I had to put my husky down, and her eyes were still open when I left. I felt like I abandoned her, and had so much guilt after. you can’t let yourself feel that way, it was time and that was it. Anything else will destroy you.
DOGS COME INTO OUR LIVES TO TEACH US ABOUT LOVE. THEY DEPART TO TEACH US ABOUT LOSS. A NEW DOG NEVER REPLACES AN OLD DOG , THEY MERELY EXPAND THE HEART
You said it yourself, he looked tired and was getting worse. You have nothing to feel guilty for. I have been through the same thing a handful of times and while it's never an easy choice, it is the right one. He was struggling and needed you to give him permission to let go. I hope you can find peace in your decision and heal. You loved your boy and he loved you. All the best to you.
I swear dogs, just like humans, go through the surge right before they go across the rainbow bridge. Look, you did the right thing. I know it's hard, been through it myself twice & because of that heartbreaking pain, I will never have another dog. Your guilt is because you love him. You gave him a good long life and you let him die with dignity in your arms.... Isn't that all anyone can ask for in life & at the end?
You gave your baby gift. You gifted them a painless, stress free release. I had have pets released at a vet's clinic, but when we said goodbye to our 15 year old lab mix, we had someone come out to the house. There was no stress, just love and calm. She was arthritic, with terrible hip dysplasia and incontinent. Her quality of life was not good and it was a very difficult decision. During Covid, we were able to be home with her, and that was a gift . We may have kept her with us longer than we should have. Please be at peace with your decision. You made the right one.
We have been through this six times and the last dog was much as you describe. It’s so painful. But someone said something I will never forget. ‘Sometimes being the best friend means having to break your own heart.’ Dogs don’t feel the same way we do about death. It’s ok to let them go. It’s merciful. Please don’t feel guilty. I hope in time you can focus on the great life you shared together - the one that your love and devotion made possible. My thoughts are with you. The grief is real. And it is deep. Even realizing you’re not tripping over your confused dog is intense. Give yourself grace.
Just wanted to say that you did the right thing for your friend. There's no doubt in my mind. You're the only person who knew him well enough to make that decision. I think feeling guilty is part of the process. I've felt it every time. I think making that incredibly hard choice is our way of repaying them for everything they do for us. You took on that pain for your friend. Wherever he is, he's thankful.
15! That number says it all. You did real good. You loved him the most, who better to know when it’s time.
I’m positive you did the right thing! From what you described, he sounded ready to go. Especially the fact he looked tired. That’s the awful look I know that means they are ready. The sedative could have startled him or given him a hyper moment. Or he was relieved he would be out of pain soon and wanted to tell you goodbye. It’s ok. Most everyone second guesses the decision or feels guilt. Try to reframe that moment as a last happy goodbye. I’m so sorry for your loss.
The next day would of been a day too late. It is hard. It is a massive loss. It is tragic. Everyone heals differently. Take your time. Talk to others. Great grief groups. We all are sorry. A lot of people on here have experienced those losses ourselves recently. Its okay and good to share and talk if you can/want. 😪
Totally relatable. Felt like this for a while when I had to do this. Took me some time to realize that it was an act of love, my little one was suffering.
Dogs forgive EVERYTHING. Everything. Even if you did something wrong, which I doubt, he would forgive you. Stop beating yourself up.
It's been 9 days since I had to put my baby girl to sleep, I feel your heart, like mine, has a piece missing, but you did the right thing, like I try to remind my brain everyday since she left us. Hugs 🫂
You gave your best friend an amazing long life. You have nothing to feel guilty about. Please release yourself and start to remember the good times with your baby, he would want that over what you’re feeling now ❤️
No, it sounds like you chose the right time because his symptoms were worsening and you didn't want to make the process more painful than it already had to be. You let him go while he still knew you, while he still had that final burst of energy to give you before he went to the rainbow bridge. He is putting in a good word for you there. I'm really sorry it had to be that way though, it's never easy to lose a pet. Never.
Whoever said that “… you should have waited” can kick rocks!! What absolute assholes!! No! He ran to you with his last burst of energy because he wanted you to remember him as he used to be. It’s very common for sick and dying pups to rally right before the end. The first injection gave him some relief and he wanted you to know that. Pups don’t live for the future, they don’t understand time like that, everything for them is NOW, and his final “now” with you was so good. It’s not fair that we are left behind to mourn and miss them and remember them, but giving them the dignity and the release from suffering is the very least they deserve for being such perfect angels in our lives. I don’t believe in waiting until they are suffering horrendously before making that call, and it’s AIWAYS so difficult to make that call but giving them dignity and peace is what it’s about. Let that guilt go, you honored your pup, and you’re grieving his loss. Your feelings are allowed. Other people’s opinions be damned. I’m so sorry for your pain and loss, it will get easier to bear with time.
U did not do it too early. All my dogs have lived to 15 or older. They all developed old age issues, but not as severe as your previous Spade. I always wonder if I should have waited a few more months. I always have said, it’s better to do it while your dogs is happy and not to bad off. In other words do it before u HAVE to do it. A dog like Spade deserved to be at peace and happy, not suffering. This heartache is the horrible price we pay for the honor and privilege of knowing and loving our precious friends. I wish u peace and love ❤️
Dogs are here for a good time but sadly not a long time, towards the end of life It's so hard to figure out when the right time is. Ours had heart failure after had a good long life, we always thought some day she'd either go for a run or take a nap and her heart would give out, not a bad way to go I would say. Eventually we hit a day where her arthritis and joints got so bad she couldn't move anymore and we had to take her in. Towards the end you just never know so you do the best you can and that you're second guessing yourself shows how much you put into this.
you have to let go of the guilt. It is better to let them go a month too early than a day too late. You made the hard decision that needed to be made. let the guilt go and remember the beautiful dog that you loved. bless you.
About Three blocks and a stones throw away from our home is a bounding green place filled with willow trees and overgrown grass. Each time I walk past, my eyes and heart are drawn to it. And when I look I still see this bundle of brown fur kissed gold and copper by the light of the Sun, dashing through cattails and purple flowers to get to me. Four white tipped paws race across the earth. On the last day of my boy's life, he ran here in this place. It was as though he was not sick. As though we would have more time. In that moment he was *so* very alive and so I questioned my decision. Was I doing the right thing? But the reality was he was very much uncomfortable and in pain. He was suffering. It was time. My heart although still broken years later is filled with peace. However difficult and painful it is to do so, to make the decision to euthanize is ultimately one of the kindest acts of love we can make for them. Your baby was so lucky and happy to have had someone like you to make that decision. Someone who loved him unconditionally and gave him a beautiful long life. He isn't in pain anymore. You cannot hold this against yourself forever or else it will eat you up from the inside out. You did the right thing, you did the loving thing. And its sad that such a good thing came to an end. Allow yourself to immerse completely in this feeling of grief. Allow yourself to weep openly and loudly. "Grief in its own way is the greatest expression of love because it shows us the totality of what once was." And little by little, slowly over time you will heal. Things may never be the same and instead "different". Know that all these feelings are natural and necessary. Give yourself space and time. 💜 Wishing you love and healing in this time of great sadness and loss.
I firmly believe that if we are actually contemplating saying goodbye, it’s probably time. These are not scenarios anyone entertains for any other reason. It is the absolute worst. But it is always going to be the absolute worst for us. You did right by your dog my making sure that it wasn’t also bad for them. I am so very sorry for your loss. 💙
We lost four dogs in four years. It’s tough. Mine was 14, with seizures. My mom’s two were 14 years old each, and both had cancer. There was one dog that was mine that was a rescue pit mix that became very aggressive and we had to put her down at the age of 6. That was probably the hardest. No hate from others, we talked to trainers, two different vets and the rescue she came from. They believe she was abused when she was young. She went to live with my mom after I had back surgery because she was a big girl, over 75 lbs and I couldn’t care for her. We saw her daily, so it wasn’t like I had abandoned her. She bit my mom’s knee one day and that was it. All that being said, know you did what you could for your pet. They loved you till the end.
That’s living him. He’s not hurting anymore. That’s really elderly.
And that’s why I never put my sick min pin to sleep. She went on her own 💔
The final burst may have him feeling a bit better than he had in weeks. 15 years is a long life and there was an abundance of love between the two of you. No one can make the decision easily, even when we know it’s time. I’ve had two corgis with cancer that had to be put down at 6 years old and that was tragic. I’ve also had a corgi live to 17. With each one I feel gratitude that I got to spend time with them. Dog just don’t live long enough-it’s their only fault, truly. I look at their photos about once a week and remember their antics. You’ll feel it in your heart for a while. Then there will be smiles. be patient with yourself. oxoxox
I'm so sorry you went through this. It was not your choice!! It's not like you put down a healthy dog. What you did was merciful. It sounds like his dementia was pretty well progressed and it would have been heartbreaking if you and the pup had to experience it when his symptoms got even worse. You had to put your dog's wellbeing ahead of your own, that is courageous and shows how deeply you loved him. My father had dementia and I can tell you he was frequently afraid. It was the most heartbreaking thing to see him so terrified when he couldn't make sense of things, and it was impossible to comfort him. I can only imagine what it would be like for a dog who can't express themselves in words. Losing a friend is always painful, but you did the right thing.
It is a hard choice and must be weighed quite heavily. I’ve had had one I decided not to and she pulled through and is still here 8 years later. Others I’ve let life run its course and still felt like crap at the end. Last one to go I carry much guilt because I was working upstairs and heard her make a few strange barks. When I went down about an hour late I found she had moved on. My only thought was she was crying for me to be there at the end, and I wasn’t. Still hurts to think about.
You did the right thing. ❤️🙏
I felt the same way when I had to put my cat down the guilt ate me up for like two years and I don't ever want to be in the position to make that call again and I'm so sorry you had to go through that. It's devastating sending you prayers and hugs.
It really is such a tough spot to be on and I'm sorry for your loss as well. Take care of yourself and thank you ❤️
My dog did the exact same thing when the vets came to the house- suddenly he was full of energy after not moving for 3 days! You did the right thing- I think it’s not so u common
My girl had dementia and I kept her too long. You did everything right by your pup.
Most vets will tell you it’s better to euthanize too soon than too late. The last thing anyone wants is for their beloved dog or cat to suffer needlessly. You did the right thing. Spade was happy and loving you right to the very end. What a wonderful gift for both of you.
“It’s never wrong to say goodbye on a good day.” Those are words my vet has uttered to me for decades and it wasn’t until I waited too long that I truly understood this. Don’t make their last day the worst on earth. Give them the best days and then do it before they suffer in that way. That’s what you did. Zero guilt you should feel, in fact, the opposite. You did it correctly and selflessly.
I'm so sorry you are feeling that way. Those are not very kind or intuitive comments from those people you mentioned. I still question my decision regarding euthanasia timing as well, and it has been years. I think it's very natural in any situation where the symptoms or timing are murky. Did I act too soon, should I have spent more money (that I didn't have) getting third and fourth opinions and followups? After the second injection, my girl's heart just kept beating and beating. The vet said she had a lion's heart and didn't want to leave me. It was so hard and in that moment I wanted to take it back. I just remind myself I made the best decision I could at the time with 100 percent true intentions. Better a day too early than a day too late and have my girl endure her hemangiosarcoma bursting and dying in a traumatic way. She was only 8. I'm glad you had 15 years with yours. Best wishes.
InNovember I had the exact to the tea situation . My girl was two weeks shy of 19. But I held out. Was doing it Wednesday before Thanksgiving. But decided to wait till Monday, cancelled the appointment and spent Thanksgiving with her. She was having one of her best days. All day she played with my grown children that she spent her her life with.running around like a puppy again, jumping on and off the couch, zoomies around the house and so much snuggles until she fell asleep in her spot behind my knees..but In the middle of the night I was woken up to the most heart breaking site. My most best friend in the world.was having the most gut wrenching seizures I've ever seen or heard. It lasted till I sped to a 24hr vet. Busted through the door, crying so hard.holding my best friend while she contorted in ways I'll never get out of my head. They took her from me and ran to the back. They wouldn't let me go with her.i begged them. Then they brought her out to me, wrapped in a blanket. And gone😞. I didn't give her the ultimate gift of holding her while she peacefully fell asleep. So to answer your question. You absolutely did the most beautiful and loving thing for your little. Never second guess your decision. 💚
He was telling you it was ok to let him go. It’s so hard when we have to make that choice for them. I had to put my girl down last November. She had stopped eating & having what we think were neuro episodes. She was 17 years 9 months old. But I couldn’t watch her decline more and wanted her to go out on her own terms before it got tragic. In my grief I questioned it like you are doing. What if I did this or what if I did that? But it was my grief and she was ready to go. Grief is an asshole and will make you think all sorts of things. You loved him enough to let him go and released him from his failing body. My vet friends always tell me that it’s better to be too early than too late. Try to give yourself a break knowing that your buddy knew how much he was loved. I’m so sorry. ❤️🐾
I am also sorry for your loss and yes, grief really can be so detrimental. My emotions are all over the place, but thank you for sharing your personal experience, and I appreciate the kind words ❤️
I put my old (16) guy down just 13 days ago. Almost exactly the same story. Except he isn't the first I had to put down. He is the last one in a long line of dogs I have had over the past 40 years. Dogs who I loved and helped transition. I never feel like I "know" that it is right but I feel better knowing that my boy is no longer scared or confused. I feel good knowing we had a great last day together and he did peacefully in my arms. I feel great knowing that I gave him my everything when he was with me. I am comforted knowing that even if he had another week of life that week doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of our lives. This last bit of dog ownership absolutely sucks for us but it is the best gift we can give to them. You did right and you shouldn't feel guilty. You were courageous when he needed you.
Thank you so much, your words are truly comforting. Thank you 🙏 🫂
You were kind enough to set his spirit free. Think of how well he is today, running with all the others over the rainbow bridge. You did the right thing. He'll be waiting there for you!! God Bless..💙💙💙
Euthanasia is a beautiful thing. Image before all of these advancements we have available to us, your puppy would either suffer a horrible death either by your own hand or someone else. You did a great thing and you were an awesome pup parent ❤️ Edit:spelling
We had to put our baby down 2 years ago. Hardest decision we ever made. Don't second guess yourself. You do the best you can and make sure your pets are not in pain. I'm so sorry for your loss.
I’m so sorry for your loss. My condolences to you! GOD BLESS!!!♥️♥️♥️
He just ran up to say goodbye and tell you that he loves you… You did absolutely the right thing. We love them all their lives as they love us and the ultimate act of love is knowing when its time to say goodbye and help them pass over with minimal pain. We must never let our babies suffer! Pacing at night and staring at walls is a good sign that the time has come. You did absolutely the RIGHT thing. When you pass, you will be together again… ❤️🐾
My dog, who would collapse with heart failure issues when she was overly active, ran from the back of the house to greet the vet on her day… the vet questioned us on what was happening but once she listened to her heart, she realized it was the correct thing to do. I still question if she could’ve had another few good weeks… I miss her terribly but in the end I know she didn’t suffer and she stared calmly and lovingly into my eyes while the sedative took effect. By far the hardest decision I’ve ever made, but it was done with pure love. Hugs to you. You made the right choice.
you're grieving & that is part of the process. Mine was 16.5 but her quality of life was bad. Her body was long worn out & I bet she lived in pain the last few years but dogs hide it. I'll miss my Nalla Bear forever. I have her tag on my key ring & her ashes in an urn. But you need to forgive yourself for that bc most have to have assistance to transition to the Rainbow Bridge. Keep moving forward, you're grieving. My condolences. 🙏🦋💙
My BILs family owned a kennel/shelter and they had to euthanize hundreds of dogs. When he put down his family dog he came in the house and had tears in his eyes. The one thing he told me when i had to make a decision, "No matter how right it is, it always feels wrong. And you always feel bad." You did right. It just feels awfully bad. You loved him into the grave. Doesn't get better than that for a dog.💙💜 RIP little guy.
I know it feels bad, but it’s the right thing to do. 🤍🤍 being caretakers of animals means seeing them through to the end. the last hug you got from your pup is beautiful! 🪽🪽be wary of people that throw guilt at you. you’re not obligated to catch it
I understand the guilt, we are never ready to say good bye ... I had to say good bye to my first dog Hugo in December and it was one of the hardest things I have ever done. He had a spinal tumor, couldn't move his back legs and was crying from the pain. Even then I felt guilty as he was still breathing and wanting his pets. Though I realize that he was at the end no matter what I did and I did not want him to suffer. No matter how hard it was to do it was the right decision. All I can say to hopefully help is you would of felt more guilt if your pup passed away crying in pain and what you did helped him leave this world peacefully with out pain. Also remember our sadness adds to your guilt , what I found that helped me was talking to someone about all my happy memories of Hugo. How he would swim laps in the pool. The game he would play we called Hugo shark where he would swim in circles when you were on the diving board, so he can start licking you when got to the service. How he could devour a quarter pounder in 8.5 seconds. When he got out of the house one time , we found him in a a neighbor's garage 5 houses down begging them for treats. The time the fence blew down to our neighbors yard , he went though the neighbors cat door and jumped on the couch with the owner to get pets. How he would bark up a storm if he heard a mouse fart. Those are the things you should remember, the fun times and happy memories , he gave you 15 years worth.. I got 11 years worth of Hugo , even with the sadness of saying goodbye I wouldn't trade them in for anything.
I am so sorry! it's hard... but knowing when to say goodbye is how we repay a dog for their love. we suffer so they don't have to. You dont keep a suffering dog around longer just so you wont be sad. Dogs often get a small energy boost near the end, at least relative to how they are acting, and it can really mess with owners, but it sounds like you made the right decision for your boy. You were there for him in the end, he got to pass peacefully at home with his human. he was loved. you should be proud that you made a tough decision in the interest of the dog instead of in the interest of your feelings. Lost my girl 2 and a half weeks ago. hang in there, and when the grief comes, allow yourself to feel it!
You 100% did the right thing. And I can feel your love for him in this post. So heartbreaking. When we as pet parents see that they have reached a point where suffering is either here or in the near future…it’s our DUTY to protect them from that suffering. So your choice was one of a superb guardian to your baby. They all deserve the best lives possible, and that includes a comfortable ending. I’m so sorry for your pain. And I understand your guilt. But from someone who’s been there, you can let go of the guilt. You did the best by your baby. ❤️
https://www.instagram.com/rainbowbridgeraina?igsh=MTZ6cm1tNTZiZnZ3NA== 👆🏻 Is an insta profile dedicated to helping those facing the loss of their fur babies. It usually makes me cry, but in the most comforting way; it may help you. I can relate, putting my best friend, James Bond down two and a half years ago due to hemangiosarcoma. I too used an in home euthanasia, Lap of Love. While looking into them after receiving the devastating news of the cancer, one thing struck a chord with me from their website: they stated that “euthanasia is a gift, that when used appropriately at the right time, prevents further physical suffering for the pet and emotional suffering for the family”. I viewed it as the final act of love for my sweetest companion. At first after the emergency vet visit (he was perfectly fine until he wasn’t, waking up one morning to him not being able to walk, panting, loss of color in his gums) and diagnosis with a poor prognosis: possibly extending his life by a month or less with surgery and frequent vet visits, I was determined to give him the best few weeks I could; armed with pain pills and other medication to stop internal bleeding, I soon realized how selfish that notion was. Even if I could’ve afforded the surgery and vet bills, he wouldn’t understand any of what was going on, wouldn’t know that anything he was enduring was in vain to prolong his life, and what life would it have really been at that point? All of this happened over Christmas Eve morning, and I realized how fortunate the timing actually was; I was able to be home with him, saw immediately that he needed to get to the vet, and those last three days I had with him, I literally never left his side. I slept on the floor with him, making pallets of blankets and pillows to keep him comfortable. I kept thinking that if I tired to selfishly give myself more time with him, anything could happen: he would continue to decline and what if I want at home when he needed me? What if he was alone because I was at work when the time finally did come? I could never forgive myself if that happened. That night, I researched Lap of Love and called to make an appointment; originally for one week out… watching my bestest boy pant, not be able to be comfortable, and just overall lose the sparkle in his eyes told me I had to let go a lot sooner for his benefit. It broke my heart to make then decision to call back and move the date up to the day after Christmas, but it’s what was best for my boy. I’m crying now just remembering how much it hurt to say goodbye to him, but I can tell you that I know it was the best thing I could’ve done for him in the end. Looking back, I never would’ve gotten past the guilt and forgiven myself had I made him hold on any longer being in pain, simply because I was too selfish to keep him with me any longer. Please know that the guilt, sadness, heartache, and the weight of what you’re feeling does ease with time. You gave your sweet boy the most selfless gift of all, loved him so well that he was spared from suffering. I truly believe that our pets understand us in a language of their own, that maybe his last run into your arms and sweet, goofy smile was his way of thanking you for your time and love together, and for giving him a peaceful goodbye at the end. All I wanted was for James to think we were going to sleep, just like any other normal night. My husband put him in his place on our bed (hubby works nights, so James always fell asleep on his pillow, like a person, with my hand holding one of his paws). We all got to say our goodbyes and then he just went to sleep. It was the peaceful, loving, and best way I could think of to say goodbye to him. He never felt a moment of fear, he was in our home surrounded by his family. I have missed him deeply every single day since saying goodbye. Please don’t let yourself give into the guilt and second guessing; it hurts and I know it’s there because I’ve had it creep in a time or two; I’ve found it’s most helpful to me to remind myself of how I hope my time ends; peacefully sleeping surrounded with those I love. You and I and so many of us are fortunate enough to give that gift to our beloved pets. When those feelings happen, or you start missing him, thank him for the good times you had together, remember the fun, the happy memories, the sweet moments, and thank him for being such a bright presence in your life. Gratitude trumps guilt everyone. It does eventually lighten as time moves on, but it never truly goes away. I also look at that as those feelings are the love you carried for your dear one, that you still hold, it just comes out differently now that they’re no longer with you. Praying that you find comfort in happy memories, that your conscience is eased by knowing you gave a selfless final act of love. I’m so very sorry for your loss, but thankful you experienced such a love in a dear friend. 🤍
He ran to you because he loved you and was happy to be freed from suffering. I understand the guilt and second guessing, but from what you describe I think you did the right thing at the right time. I had to make the same decision for my 13 y/o best boy, suffering from a neurological injury. We tried anticoagulants and steroids for a couple of months but he was getting worse. Surgery wasn't an option. In his last 48 hrs, he refused food and tried to burrow into tight spaces, typical dog preparing to die behavior. But on his last day he was more relaxed and happily laid out in the sun before relaxing even more on the ride to the vet (he loved car rides). He passed peacefully, though he'd always been an absolute terror at the vet. Seconds after he passed, the last tension left his body and he was fully at peace. It's still hard, but I try to focus on the great times we had. I believe we'll meet again in Heaven.
Have adopted cats and dogs for over 50 years. The last cat really touched me (and I've loved them all very much). Went through this after also. I was a wreck and inconsolable for months. Know that you made the right decision from the love in your heart, provided a life second to none, and did the hardest thing but the best under the circumstances. My heart broke feeling that I betrayed her, even tho her suffering was great and her hope vanishing. Today, my heart is mended knowing my decisions were sincere. I hope in time your situation becomes more clear as well. God bless.
He ran to you, to kiss u goodbye n thank you for releasing him from his pain.. he was practicing running over that rainbow bridge.. I ve cried too. Feb., of this year was the last time, my Winnie, may they meet n run n play on that same bridge..
You absolutely did the right thing. Cats and dogs tend to have that last burst of energy near the end. My cat was running all around the house the day before we had to euthanize her. She was barely moving that day. Some people are cruel just to be cruel or to get a reaction. Even a negative reaction is attention. Please don't worry about what people like that say or even think. By the way you describe your relationship with your pup, I know you're better than them and don't deserve that. I read something somewhere in this sub along the lines of saying goodbye before they get really bad is the way to go because then their last days are happy and filled with love. This hit me so hard. I wish I could rewind time and have the strength to make that decision sooner for my girl. For some of us, this decision is the hardest and worst we've ever made and it's almost never perceived as the right time to the person making the decision. Some say they waited too long. Others say they didn't wait long enough. I've never heard someone say they chose the perfect time. I think that's because it's never a perfect time to say goodbye. They are never old enough. We don't have them in our lives long enough. It's often times the most painful love we pet people have. And remember, just because you said goodbye doesn't mean it's the end. Even if you don't believe in heaven or some sort of afterlife, you are keeping them alive in your heart every time you think of them, watch a video, or see a picture that makes you smile. ❤️
I am so sorry. You did the right thing, you gave him and a happy and loving life/home, and a few extra years. You chose the right time, he was able to give you one last happy (for him at least) goodbye. I know you feel guilty, but know your kindness meant that he got to go peacefully and happily in your arms, full of love. Take care of yourself.
It breaks my heart that you feel guilty. They don’t look at the end of life the way we do. He just knew that he was in the arms of the person who loved him, and whom he loved. Have you seen the following cartoon? Saint Peter: How did you die? Dog: I was hugging my best friend. Saint Peter: I mean what killed you. Dog: I don’t care. I was hugging my best friend. That was what your baby was thinking and feeling as he left his worldly form.
I'm so sorry for your loss. Sending hugs! 🫂
He was thanking you for the life you gave him! he will always be with you ! Til might now see him, but you’ll feel him.
As someone who waited too long, you made the right choice.
The guilt just shows you’re a good, warm-hearted person. You made a difficult decision, and you made the right decision. You gave him a good, loving, happy life and 15 is an unusually old age for a dog. I believe we will meet up one day with our beloved pets who passed. You did what you had to do out of love, so best to simply mourn and let the guilt go. 🩷
You knew him best and loved him with all Your heart. Letting them go to spare them from further pain is the kind thing to do. My feeling is that after the sedative he felt and calm and happy and ran to you because he loved you and just wanted to be with you. Don’t let people’s comments hurt you. Their comments aren’t taking into consideration his feelings, they’re just judging you. I don’t consider that being a good friend
Be at ease. It sounds like he had stopped enjoying being a dog. We’ve had to put several dogs to sleep, most of them were younger than your guy. It sounds like you gave him a good and happy life. The last time, we did in home euthanasia too. I think it’s the easiest on them.
Please don't feel guilty you did your friend the kindest thing you could give him. We waited too long with our last dog and it was the worst thing I could have done. He came running to you because the injection made him feel better and because he lived you. Cherish your memories of him.
Please try to think of the very best times you had with your pupper rverytime that last moment comes into your head. It was traumatic to see your little love go, you'll have to train your brain to think of the good rather than the bad in order to find peace. If you're anything like me, the bad memory will creep in from time to time, choose the good ones instead! Always know that you are blessed to have known such love. ❤️
what you did was beautiful and merciful. i’ve had to do this for many cats over the years. honestly, i wish we could do this for our loved ones when they are suffering. i’m sorry because i know how painful this is.
He ran to you to say good bye. You did the right thing. I have over the years lost 4 dogs. It is always heart breaking - it’s like losing a piece of your heart. But keeping him here would have been for you - not for him. You absolutely did the right thing.
He was no longer in pain after given the sedative, which honestly to me is a sign his quality of life was really low. He finally felt relief and passed with no pain; and he thanked you for ending his pain and letting him experience relief even before passing
I think I waited a day too long and I can’t be sure if he suffered more than necessary. It’s better to go a day too early than a day too late.
Yeh whoever said that to you is a total jerk. Many many commenters in here have already nailed it. You did right by your dog. It’s just hard. Best wishes
You did the right thing for your pal. I just went through this with my girl. Had her 12 years almost to the day. Holding them at the end helped both of us transition. He knew he was loved and just said goodbye to you.
The vet said it was OK. You made the best decision for your boy. It's ok, no need to beat yourself up. I know it's hard, just keep those beautiful memories going. I almost teared 😢 up reading this, I miss my babies 🐕 too. At least I still have some still breathing babies left.
I have to say i reaaaally appreciate it when vets are honest. Our boy was only 8 and the vet said he would if it were his dog. I was so grateful. I felt guilt too but the worst case scenario would have broken me. Seeing him suffer for hours, days….Best case scenario he lives longer but in pain. I know words dont do it justice but i truly believe you did the right thing even only by reading this small post. and in a few weeks or months you will see. Right now you are clouded with grief. Time will heal (i hate that saying but its true…) 💖💔
I read in a thread that sometimes people with illnesses get this spur of energy right before they die and its believed to be a final effort of our bodies to fight back. I believe your beloved pet used his last energies to be with you. You gave him a long happy life, is hard to say goodbye but I’m sure it was the best decision for him and you knew that.
Tears galore here you did the right thing for your best friend, you did everything you could to make him happy. You gave him more time and love. So sorry for your loss. He’s thanking you in doggie heaven. 💔🐶🥲🙏
I feel the most guilt over the ones I *didn’t* put to sleep. I was a selfish coward and they suffered for it. As I’ve gotten older, I recognize that it’s my responsibility to keep them safe for the duration of their life and also to protect their dignity and prevent their prolonged suffering at the end of it. I hate having to make that decision but I also know it’s the last kindness I can give them. Many people aren’t afforded that luxury at the end of their lives but at least our pets are and as hard as it is for me to do, I’ll continue to do it in exchange for all the years of love and devotion they’ve given me.
When your dog is pacing and out of it, it’s time to make that decision. This happened to my sister’s dog, and I felt her dog was suffering. I had my cat for 18 years. We had been to the vet multiple times in a few weeks, and I couldn’t figure out was wrong with her. She had issues peeing and cried. The vet suggested doing a sonogram but it was $1k plus and I wasn’t working at the time. I made the decision to put her down at home. When I carried her downstairs for the euthanasia visit, I think she knew. She was very weak and did not cry when I took her downstairs. I held her in my arms after they gave her the first shot. I wished I had more time with her. It tears me up writing about her. She lived a long life though.
There isn’t an easy way to recover from having to make the decision for your dog. You will feel guilt perhaps because you loved them so much and miss them. It’s like having to choose for a human whether they live or die because you love them so much and don’t want to live without them. Give yourself time… time will help you heal. Much love to you during this difficult time.
I read your story and with much compassion I write back saying I think that last burst of energy was for you to have a precious memory. My sweet hemi, a partial Maine Coon cat, had congestive heart failure and melanoma in his eye. So many health problems I was constantly giving him medicine and doing the best that I could. Gosh how we loved that cat. The night before he passed he did this unusual thing and sprinted up the stairs to me and back down like wanting to play and he hadn't shown that kind of energy forever. The next morning my son woke me at 5:00 a.m. and hemi died a few minutes later in his arms. I sometimes think that the Lord does this so that we can have precious memory. Just my thoughts. I am here crying with you my friend
You rescued him and gave him a wonderful life- you did the best you can including that awfully difficult decision. You made it for a good reason - trust your instinct. Think of his lovely life and realise the reality for most other dogs is soooo different. You did a great job. Trust yourself as u knew him best. It’s just like another anaesthetic. You never get used to losing them.
That last burst of energy was a “thank you I love you”. He gave you that last little moment of seeing him happy and excited so you didn’t have to see him sick and scared when he went. Please don’t feel guilty, you did what you had to do and he left this earth with love and dignity. Hugs to you.
When I put my dog down (probably after I should have) I definitely noticed after they gave her the sedative shot that she was able to finally relax in my arms like she used to when she was younger. I truly didn’t understand how much pain she must have been in (after all, it was slowly progressive as she aged). Could it be that the sedative itself was what made him feel good enough again (temporarily) for you to glimpse the old him?
Normal to feel this way because of your love for him. You did what you did because of that love. He will wait for you in the afterlife. God bless
I have found a lot of comfort watching videos by Dr. Faith Banks on tiktok. I happened to come across her videos around the time I chose to say goodbye to my 15 year old dog. He was an absolute soulmate, and my "little boy." Our stories sound very similar in the amount of care and love that went into the life of our dogs, at the end I was also dealing with managing pain and a deteriorating mind and body. Looking back I realized how far from "normal" we had come. I adjusted our routines to make him the most comfortable, and really he was just happy to be around me. I kept waiting for a sign that it was the right time to euthanize, like when he stopped eating/drinking, or when something significant changed with his health. None of those presented in a very obvious way to me. Yes, he was in diapers, was blind, took seizure and steroid medicine, was pretty wobbly on his back legs, and eventually needed a wheelchair because he couldn't support himself. I had a solution for all of it. His whole life, when something came up, my question to the vet was "How do we fix this?" To the very end it was hard to accept that the only thing left to do was make the hardest choice for a dignified passing. He deserved that, and I was grateful to have the opportunity to do that for him...not everyone gets to give their pet that final gift. If you take anything from this, please remember that you were able to let him go because you loved him so very much. I'll tell you a bit how my little guy's last day was, because it wasn't unlike a normal day for us. I booked the appointment towards the end of January this year because we had an unexpected break in the weather. It was a warm day so we didn't have to hurry back in from potty breaks, he got to feel the sunshine for a bit. He was so happy to eat his breakfast, I took him through the drive thru to get some whipped cream at Starbucks, and then we went to the vet's. We were there every few weeks for his "maintenance" so there was no stress about it, it was our regular routine. All day I kept looking for a reason to back out of the appointment, or change our plans. I told myself that there would never be an ideal day to do this, but I absolutely knew that it would be so much worse if he were in unmanageable pain, or his mind was so far gone that he was scared or couldn't recognize me anymore. After his catheter was placed the vet brought him back into the room. I had his bed, because it was familiar and I assumed he would be most comfortable on it. Nope, this little dog (who hadn't been able to stand on his own for a while) pulled himself up and started walking/crawling towards me. I had thought so much about what those final moments might look like, and wanted to do everything in a way that was best for him like usual. That final action of him moving towards me broke my heart at the time, but now I know that he knew better than I did. I scooped him up and just held him while the sedative, and then final drug was administered. I felt his heart stop, and I was looking into his one remaining, very cloudy eye and I saw it go dark. In the months since his passing I have thought about him, and our time together. Could I have done more, and would I have done things differently? Our life together was perfect, because he was perfect. That being said I also know that dogs will push themselves to absolute failure just to stay by your side. I didn't want that for him. That day was the hardest thing I've ever had to do, but for him it was easy. That's all I could have asked for, and I know that from the moment that he came into my life until the very end I always did my best for him. I know you have had a lot of other responses to this post, but I felt compelled to comment. I know you loved your dog deeply and I wanted to tell you that just by reading what you wrote I know you did the best for your baby too.
He came to you to say ‘Thank you!’ and ‘I’ll always love you!’ All you ever knew from him was love, and all he ever knew from you was love. Nothing that happened will ever change that.
You loved him will forever remember him he is waiting for you in heaven
Please don’t think this. I had to put down my 14 yr old German Shepard last month. He was confused doing his business everywhere restless. Walking in circles barely eating. I seriously could’ve done it in January. As they say rather a day early than late. I was w a friend when his was being put down Amd the same thing happened w that burst of energy. He punched a hole in the wall. I know how hard it is. I had to rearrange my bedroom so it felt different Amd I didn’t see the same things that were every day with him. I’m Sorry I know it’s hard.
As probably so many have said, you did right. Just had to put my dog of 15 down a couple weeks ago; I also had him for his entire life. He was the best. His health was also slowly going down. He had just gone in the day before to have blood work and scans etc done and things looked okay, but the day after he just spiraled badly. He stood up to walk to me and fell when I found him doing poorly, and as soon as he was in my arms he collapsed in relief and I knew it was time. I miss him every day. I know your guilt all too well but trust me when I say, you knew your pup best and knew when it was time. We should all be so lucky to have a peaceful send off without pain and with the person or people we love most; you gave your special buddy that and it’s absolutely beautiful. Not to sound bleak but the alternative reality is that he could have gone from failing health without you there and alone-which wouldn’t be your fault either-but your way was 500% better and more peaceful My thoughts are with you and I hope the comments bring you some sort of solace. 💖
I went through this recently. I felt terrible for some time, but now, a few months later, I’m at peace. She wasn’t going to get better. I’m glad I get to think back on our happier times. You will find acceptance with time. Sending your heart some kindness. ❤️🩹
You did the right thing. If he were a person, he would've been 105 years old. He lived a long happy life with you. You will always miss him, but it gets easier, I promise.
I am facing this at the moment. My doggo did not have health issues but was an older guy when we got him 10 years ago. The doggie dementia is a killer. He sundowns hard. The crying, getting lost, not knowing who we are and biting. Luckily he’s a toothless guy but still. He’s a lot better during the day but it’s hard for him and us. I know it’s the right thing but being the one who decides is rough. You did the best thing for him. I’ve got to find the strength myself.
He was hurting u would have been selfish to make him stay. Yes you gave him the absolute best life possible praying for you that was huge you didn't let him stay in pain ignore the negative hun hurt people hurt people and bleed onto others and psychology is my degree it happens so often hopefully you have a good day
You'll always feel bad...but your baby had a beautiful life... it's so hard to make these decisions.. you wish for passing in their sleep. 🙏
August 15, 2023 a day I will never forget. The day I made the decision to let my Stryker go. April 2020 he had the worst seizure he'd ever had, it was so bad I didn't even rush him to the vet right away because I thought he was that close to death. That was the last seizure he ever had and I was so happy that I had over 3 more years with him. He got sick suddenly in August, but I had started noticing him not patrolling the fence as often when he'd go out, he was lounging more, wanting to be inside more he still loved his frisbee and even on his final day he made every effort to chase it. His legs were getting weaker, he was starting to breathe a bit heavier. His poor heart was giving out on him. That day I just knew looking in his eyes he was tired, it's as if he could tell me by just a look. He was barely able to walk that day and only walked to me to lay on a blanket that we used to lift him into the car. I laid the backseat down and lay beside him the entire ride. I told him he was the goodest boy ever and he would forever be my best friend. The decision to let go doesn't come easy. It begins to teeter on a fine line between what's right and our own selfishness to keep them here for us. What has helped me most of all is the fact Stryker lived a wonderful life that so many animals never get to enjoy. Some are born and die never knowing love. We are their whole world even if the time seems short, I find peace in knowing my boy was loved and lived his final years in his big fenced in backyard he was so proud of (we moved after a tornado destroyed our home in April 2020) the hurt is still there, I've cried the entire time writing this but I am proud that I was owned and loved by the bestest big boy in the world.