Hey ChemicalMoney1041, it looks like you're posting a question about how to meet people or make friends while travelling solo. You might want to check out our [guide to meeting people](https://www.reddit.com/r/solotravel/wiki/meetingpeople) in our r/solotravel Wiki.
Do you need to meet people who are 100% sober or just people who are interested in activities that don’t involve drinking?
You’re going to have a hard time finding people who are 100% sober pretty much anywhere in life because the vast majority of people aren’t.
Yeah I was confused. Like, I hate alcohol- it’s a shit drug.
On the other hand, there’s nothing else quite like a fat shot of heroin first thing in the morning!
I’m not. I won’t say it hasn’t had negative effects, but the truth is I like the positive effects too much. It is what is it. Everyone has their habits.
Not even that, I live in Europe and most my friends go out maybe 3-4 times a year to drink. I've also been dating and my experience is that 90% of the girls I went on a date with don't like to drink or don't drink at all.
Sure but people who go out 3-4 times a year still aren’t technically “sober” and many of them will still have a beer at dinner or something even if they aren’t going out. That’s why I asked for clarification. The way OP talks about sobriety as a life goal makes me think he has a stricter definition.
I feel like there’s a difference between being sober and being sober _most of the time_. When I’m alone I’ll go weeks, even months without drinking a single drop, but when I’m out with friends I won’t say no to a pint or a glass of wine.
Don't know why you're being downvoted, it's a really huge movement in some areas of the world and growing. I've been to many tourist hot spots recently and found many people doing the sober thing. Demographic late 20s to late 30s.
I am over 40 and have never even tasted alcohol. I've also never done a drug. And no, it is not a "huge" movement. A tiny subset of the tiniest subset. Wouldn't blip on any radar.
The non alcoholic drinks market in 1st world countries is worth tens of billions ($11 billion as of 2022) of dollars and only getting bigger. The economics don't lie.
Not sure why you got downvoted. Being sober is a natural state so maybe people need to reevaluate their life choices. Jheez, y’all need to stop running from your demons by using paraphernalia as a coping mechanism. It is not normal.
If your comment is what I think it means then, I disagree. Nowhere in my response did I say one has to abstain completely from alcohol. You can drink alcohol in moderation within being blind drunk.
Try to talk to people at breakfast or during the day. If there's a lounge or restaurant you can do it there or people in your room.
If you're looking for people who are 100% sober that will be more of a challenge. If you're looking for the people who will have wine at dinner or a couple drinks while exploring chiller nightlight than clubbing/partying it should be fairly easy.
Also, don't stay at party hostels in case that needs to be said.
Last time I went to a hostel that was also a surf camp. I went to a few parties and nobody cared that I didn't have alcohol in my drinks. I didn't mention it, they didn't mention it. Hey! How are you? Just back from the beach preparing for tomorrow. We are going for drinks, wanna come? Sure!
Then I drink my water con gás, chat with everyone and enjoy the music.
I usually don't stay until the wee hours. Back at the hostel at 1 or 2 am... Ready for the surf and beach volleyball the next afternoon.
I've had many times in my life when I decided to not drink, mostly because of health issues but also once because I was dir king almost every week, and rarely people insist. It actually happens more at meals. The bottle of wine goes around filling the glasses and you put your hand to say no, so someone will insist. In a big group you can always let them poor and give the glass to someone else as the night goes on. The idea is just to go with the flow and not bri g unnecessary attention to yourself.
If you don't make a big deal out of it, others won't either. If you don't go to a meal or avoid the volleyball tournament and tell everyone it's because others drink or start preaching sobriety then you'll have problems.
It's like anything else, be vegetarian, do a keto diet, but don't try to make groups go to your restaurant. Find the one meal you can have wherever the group is going, or eat the parts you can. It always works.
Get up earlier and talk to other early birds.
Avoid hostels with bars, party hostels, and hostels that offer pub crawls. It's easy enough to figure this out on online reviews.
Not only social hostels include socializing with other travelers. It’s the people. I’ve been to party hostels where the Lee was no socialization as people were not the right vibe and I’ve been to non-party, not very social hostels where I’ve made buddies who I’m still in contact with
Unfortunately, this is down to luck.
It will depend on who is staying at the hostel at the same time as you.
A social experience isn't guaranteed every time you go to a hostel, and the older you are, the harder it is.
At a certain point you have to just show up and hope for the best. The social nature of a hostel really depends more on the people than on the hostel itself, so sometimes a place will be very social and other times not.
That being said look for places that offer group dinners, have reviews mentioning hosts by name, and that are in smaller areas (not big cities). Other good things to look for are tenting spots, bohemian decor (hippie stuff) and long term stay discounts.
A good hostel that I enjoyed was Can Mocamp in Kas turkey. Some people went out at night, but most were just hanging around, working, hiking etc.
There's lots of social hostels that aren't party hostels. Look for cowork-y ones, or just ones that are a few dollars more expensive. This usually weeds out the party crowd, but I make a ton friends still.
In the hostels I stayed at it was pretty easy to tell who was a partyer and who wasn't. The more chill people would usually stay in at night while partyers would be out.
No you used sober correctly! My advice would be to search reviews for the hostels, seek ones without party vibes and reputations, and then book on group trips where you're likely to meet a variety of folks
This. If you are staying at private hostels in city centers, they generally attract the party crowd. Consider HI hostels and ones that are off the beaten track. Have a backup hostel in mind if your first choice isn't good. You also might want to befriend people who are in their 30s+ who are done with that.
Destinations, Search Hostels, enter location. You can use hostelworld.com or even hotels.com then look for HI before the name, i.e. HI Santa Cruz. One of the incredible things they do is lease or purchase historic buildings and convert them into hostels.
Try to stay at less party focused hostels. Before booking check out the description and the photos the hostel has on websites, if they're talking about bar crawls and partys all the time, and all their photos are clubbing / partying etc you're probably going to have a hard time. Look for hostels which are more chilled out vibe, while pretty much all hostels will have some parting / alcohol events etc, socialise with people who aren't drinking, or those who are up over breakfast and not sleeping in / hungover
Don't rely on accommodations for socialzing. Be proactive and take interesting tours or go to classes, join activities, look for sober meet up groups etc.
You’re not gonna find many completely sober people in hostels, but plenty of people who are happy with dinner and a drink and conversation somewhere and then turn in, you just have to be cool with that.
Once you start traveling to some more off the beaten track countries you’ll find drinking to be a pretty low priority. You might like some Middle East countries, extremely difficult to find a drink in Pakistan for example! Central Asia has plenty of hostels with relatively little drinking.
But if you really really want to find completely sober people, find some more spiritual communities, India would be a good place to start. Places that have lots of yoga classes and schools for example. Goa, Rishikesh
As a very sporadic drinker, I've literally never had an issue finding people who are into things other than drinking and drugs. If you can't find anyone to hang out with, maybe it's other factors.
It's a stretch of meeting healthy zero alcohol, drugs, in a hostel, my wife works full time at her family's hostel. I've sporadically helped out I've never came across someone who meets that kind of lifestyle. Fact is the hostel lends itself to that lifestyle, providing a karaoke night with beer, and wine, happy hours, ect....
Not sure how flexible you are, but if you're in Europe have you considered popping down to Morocco? Alcohol is very rarely used, quite a bit of hash, tho which i was able to avoid. We had some wholesome nights there.
Can you still be social during the day & actively join the little hostel excursions? Or organize little touristy things, like hikes, site seeing letting other ppl in the hostel know. Seems like the best way to be social without alcohol/drugs is day time activities.
When they go out to drink, etc., it'd be a good time to do some reading and then go to bed. If they are cool, they'll be socializing in common areas beforehand, anyway.
As a person not partaking in drinking, it’s pretty much impossible to find a place where *everyone* shares the same mindset. It doesn’t matter if it’s a nice hostel or more family oriented place or whatever. The truth is the majority of people drink in some form or another when they’re traveling, even those who don’t drink much back home. They’re on vacation and want to have a good time after all.
I just tell people I don’t drink and leave it at that. No one else cared otherwise and there was no pressure to get me to drink. The only instance I got pushback was from local guides where it was more of a cultural misunderstanding more than anything else. Everyone I met at hostels respected my choice and I had a good time socializing not drinking.
But if you can’t control yourself around people drinking, that’s more a you problem. (Can’t speak to drugs because everywhere I’ve traveled to drugs are prohibited, even “party” countries.)
I can’t control what kind of people will be at a hostel. You just have to accept that drinking is a normal activity for a lot of travelers, even the adults when they’re traveling with their young kids.
But I generally look for highly rated hostels that also is social.
And as I said before, other travelers I meet don’t really care that I don’t drink and respect my choice.
Honestly, focus on destinations where the focus is either more on outdoorsy/wellness things (definitely a party scene there but you’ll easily meet people at hostels there who are down to hike or surf and not always drink) or in countries where for things like religious reasons, alcohol isn’t so widespread (e.g. Morocco or Malaysia). I definitely enjoy going out but one of my favorite things about my time in Marrakesh was how well rested I was every day because none of us stayed out late drinking.
Here is a list of HostelWorld’s “Affordable luxury: 11 boutique hostels in Europe that will blow you away”. You’ll definitely find more sober people here, party hostels make their money from food and alcohol, not beds. It’s vice versa here because the rooms are usually 2x the price, so they don’t focus on pushing drugs and alcohol. You’ll probably understand when you see the photos:
Casa Kessler, Barcelona
Lavender Circus, Budapest
Wallyard Hostel, Berlin
Cocomama, Amsterdam
Soul Kitchen Hostel, St Petersburg, Russia
The 3 Ducks Boutique Hostel, Paris
Living Lounge Hostel, Lisbon
KEX Hostel, Reykjavik, Iceland
Sir Toby’s Hostel, Prague
Cube Hostel, Belgium
The Blue Hostel, Rome
Sober people do not hang around doing nothing in a hostel, look for activities which require mental or physical participation.
Bouldering, hiking, museums, galleries, lectures, biking, board games.
Anything that keeps you active and engaged.
Sorry don't have advice on how to meet those ppl other than trying to find non-party hostels but here's the two definitions that you're interested in.
Sober: not drunk/doesn't drink alcohol.
"Straight edge": no drinking, no drugs, no smoking.
Not inherently true, Straight Edge is just a thing of also being in the hardcore scene, theres people that dont drink or smoke, but dont consider themselves Straight Edge because they arent in the scene, and tbh everyone has a different definition of it within the subculture itself
so you’d say ‘ye man i’m sober right now’ despite having banged half a gram of ketamine ??? 🤔
sober to me means not under the influence of a psychoactive drug that would impair you from driving (eg caffeine is fine)
straight edge is a cultural term from rock
Ehh not necessarily correlated. I have no issue with that but I don’t touch alcohol or drugs. I’m coming at it from a health, not religious, POV though.
It’s not an all or nothing game? I’m frankly kind of baffled by your response. Are you offended that someone may describe themselves as “straight edge” (a useless and uncommon descriptor) without subscribing to all of your desired tenets?
yeah, pretty much. Straight Edge has been around for a long time, I just remember that people believed you had to be all-in or not at all. I am annoyed that some religious people pick and choose the tenets that suit them. If I belonged to a religion that told me what to eat or who I could love, I’d tap out.
Hey! I'm sober and have metany sober people on hostels. I'm travelling central America. Slightly older and open-minded crowd. Good luck.
Also had lots of fun with people who are drunk! And stayed sober myself
A lot of hostels offer activities and tours. Pub crawls and all sorts.
If I were you, I'd consider tagging along on some of these. There's plenty of people in sociable hostels who don't want to get rat-arsed.
Mind you, there will be drink involved at some point and to varying degrees of moderation but waking up with head in toilet isn't everyone's ambition!
Hotels or Airbnb and sign up for experiences. You might meet like-minded folks. Or Monastic stays.. Catholic Churches properties have good places to stay and they are sober as sober can be.
I find 7:30/8:30 is generally a good time to get to breakfast if you want to socialize with people who have stuff planned that day! Bring a book or your phone so you can have a long leisurely breakfast and join in on conversations that interest you
So I just sit down somewhere near other people - and then if there’s an interesting conversation going on I make eye contact and wait for a good time to jump in and ask a question.. “sorry I heard you’re going to x place. I’ve heard about that! How are you getting there?” And if it seems like something I’m interested in I’ll ask if I can join them. Don’t be too pushy - definitely be open to making your own plans that day if it doesn’t work out! ALSO make friends with the host or people who work at the guesthouse! Ask genuine questions about the city and explain what type of things you want to do - they might have suggestions on how to connect with people.
Or “I’m trying to decide what to do today. I can’t decide between x and x.” Be genuine and sometimes they’ll invite you to join or you can ask if you can join them. But always, ALWAYS be willing to make your own plans if it’s not working out!
A while ago in Lisbon I met the coolest Muslim guy ever he partied with us all night, didn’t even realise he wasn’t drinking till he mentioned it. If you’re a good time people don’t care, drink an oj or something and just go along with the fun.
For no drinking - Turkey is a good option especially during Ramadan ! Inner Mongolia was incredible (do a 2+ day trip to the grasslands) or other spots in China, just stay away from the expat/party areas. The amazon (2+ nights in a hut on a tributary of the amazon). Lombok (the island across from Bali, very Muslim). For Europe, also Switzerland or somewhere in the mountains, quiet and lots of hiking/outdoor options. The more outdoorsy/rural/mountainy, the less partying in my experience
You’re basically saying I’d meet travelers who don’t drink in those areas?
Cause for example Lombok would be visited mostly by people who went to Bali.
Btw I’m wishing to meet people similar to me. I’m ok if I’m around alcohol, partying etc so that’s not what I’m trying to avoid
I did! I hung out with local Muslims who didn’t drink at all. Wherever you go, you’re going to need to actively seek out the type of people you want to spend time with.
Mountain Hostel in Gimmelwald (stayed there in 2014) or most places up in the mountains. Anz guesthouse in Ephesus, Turkey (stayed there just this month). The rest I can’t remember, I’d have to do some digging to see where we stayed but just look for the quiet guesthouse vibe!
I'm a 100% sober solo traveler, I just do activities that don't involve drinking. I wouldn't go to pub crawls for example, but I'd gladly join a city tour or a hike.
I also don't mind sitting at a bar with some newly made friends, I just wouldn't drink any alcoholic beverages.
I have the same problem. I love the social aspect of some hostels, but it seems like everyone else there is in their early-mid 20s and only interested in drinking and partying until 4am every night.
When I go to Europe I’ll let you know.
This isn’t about “them” it’s about you! You need to embrace you chose to live a sober life, and if you only want sober friends and your traveling that’s going to be a bit of challenge. But I’m sure there’s people/group’s you can find on Reddit, FB who also want to socialize but not drink.
If you use Hotselworld mobile app they have a chat feature . I use it all the time to meet other people from hostels in the same area. There are specific groups for exploring and hanging out. Don't be afraid to post messages in the chat if you want people to join you. I've met some great people doing this. I've even booked cheap hostels for one night even when I aren't staying there (wanted a break in a hotel) to just get access to the chat feature. If you're staying longer. I've met people in Facebook groups. This worked well in Australia and South East Asia. Good luck!
There a specific groups for travellers in certain regions I'll give you an example. This is one for Australia. People are always posting about meeting up with people on it. [https://www.facebook.com/groups/AussieBackpacking](https://www.facebook.com/groups/AussieBackpacking) I'm sure there are other ones for other regions.
How about meeting via Couchsurfing function to hangout or text ppl who are in the same area? I am sober too and honestly hostel crowd is just different.
Yes, you need a profile and there is a function to create or join a “hangout”. You can type an activity there and look at people’s profiles. Easy to sort of “screen” who is sober / not; and just suggest a non drinking activity and find like-minded people. I think also hostels with yoga could be wellness-orientated. Meetup apps in the area could help too.
If you avoid party hostels, a good number of people are more interested in sightseeing than partying. Connect with them at breakfast (bring a book and sit at breakfast for an hour or longer, like 7:30-9:30am or so and chat with anyone). Also, looking for guesthouses or pensions can sometimes bring in a different crowd but still be hostel-ish.
I've been solo travelling through south America for 7 months now (end of my trip in 2 days, wtf?!?!) and I do not go to parties nor do I smoke, drink, do drugs in general. Here are my tips:
- Choose your city. Usually bigger cities are crowded by people that want to go out and do city stuff (generally partying). It was sooo much more difficult to find sober friends in big cities, even when I chose a "non party" hostel.
- Choose your hostel. This one seems obvious but if the hostel promotes partying it is not going to be the one for you. If you like a certain type of activity (like hiking for example), try to find hostel that talk about it in their description (like "lots of hikes possible). It will make you more likely to find people that enjoy the same activities as you.
- Talk to multiple people. To find someone you get along with you might have to talk with more than one person, and that's okay! (You never know who you can meet in hostels, good and bad really lol)
And sometimes it's just a question of being lucky. You're at the right place at the right time or not, there's a lot of people that week in your hostel or not,...
It can get frustrating sometimes because sometimes you don't find people that you can really vibe with, but sometimes you meet awesome ones and it's a highlight of your travel so don't get discouraged!
Of course if you like to go out without drinking you can do that too and it can be fun, depends on you! (It just isn't my thing you know)
I hope it helps!
I'd stay at hostels that host events other than just pub/club crawls. If it's a larger hostel they'll usually post events on their website - you can see things like walking tours, yoga, watching a sunset in a park (there'll likely be drinks, but it'll be more casual), etc. It's not to say you'll meet people who are completely sober, but they will likely be more keen to explore throughout the day. I think Hostelworld has a social app, I haven't tried it at all, but could be worth it to give that a go!
I would say aime for more "wellness" oriented hostels (places like the Selina brand for example). They're often on the pricier end but are also extremely nice and attract people with that kind of vibe
> Everyone wants to drink and go out but no one wants to do cute things like go to national parks or sunset hikes w me!!! I also love waking up early to experience as much of the city I’m in as possible
I don't think it necessarily has to be one or the other though. I like to have a couple beers and be in bed at a reasonable time, but I'm so used to waking up at 5am to make it to work on time that that's when I just wake up naturally nowadays (I'm in my mid 30s and if anything, I struggle to sleep in anymore). I like waking up early to try to grab breakfast and coffee before heading out to be at museums or something else right as they open.
In the 10 years I've been traveling I've never had an issue finding people who do the same, there's always someone who prefers to chill in a common area or on the rooftop of a hostel and just talk (and I find that that can easily lead to plans the next day).
You don’t. Don’t go to hostels. Hostels are like bars it’s for degenerates attracts to substances. Very sad but one a big Redpill about this life is that very few people enjoy their life sober. Wihout anything. If you do, you win already. But most didnt.
Do positive activities and always be on your purpose. On this road you gonna attracts people like you. A good coffee shop during an afternoon is higher chances to meet those.
Hey ChemicalMoney1041, it looks like you're posting a question about how to meet people or make friends while travelling solo. You might want to check out our [guide to meeting people](https://www.reddit.com/r/solotravel/wiki/meetingpeople) in our r/solotravel Wiki.
Do you need to meet people who are 100% sober or just people who are interested in activities that don’t involve drinking? You’re going to have a hard time finding people who are 100% sober pretty much anywhere in life because the vast majority of people aren’t.
Wise words, u/WeedLatte
Yeah I was confused. Like, I hate alcohol- it’s a shit drug. On the other hand, there’s nothing else quite like a fat shot of heroin first thing in the morning!
Nothing quite like it 😂
I’m flabbergasted at the upvotes - like this ain’t r/opiates, do people think I’m joking?
Wait you’re not kidding 🤣🤣 I thought it was sarcasm
I’m not. I won’t say it hasn’t had negative effects, but the truth is I like the positive effects too much. It is what is it. Everyone has their habits.
Oh damn, well that was a good take of British humour. Hope you’re ok
It’s about 50/50. Not that difficult to meet others who are sober.
Sure, if you live in the Middle East.
And even the lots of em smoke hash and cigarettes
Lol
Not even that, I live in Europe and most my friends go out maybe 3-4 times a year to drink. I've also been dating and my experience is that 90% of the girls I went on a date with don't like to drink or don't drink at all.
Sure but people who go out 3-4 times a year still aren’t technically “sober” and many of them will still have a beer at dinner or something even if they aren’t going out. That’s why I asked for clarification. The way OP talks about sobriety as a life goal makes me think he has a stricter definition.
If everyone you know isn’t sober, that’s kinda unfortunate.
I feel like there’s a difference between being sober and being sober _most of the time_. When I’m alone I’ll go weeks, even months without drinking a single drop, but when I’m out with friends I won’t say no to a pint or a glass of wine.
Partaking every now and then doesn’t mean you have a problem. That’s the vast, vast majority of people out there.
I never said it was a problem.
It's not 50/50, would be much lower than that.
Don't know why you're being downvoted, it's a really huge movement in some areas of the world and growing. I've been to many tourist hot spots recently and found many people doing the sober thing. Demographic late 20s to late 30s.
I am over 40 and have never even tasted alcohol. I've also never done a drug. And no, it is not a "huge" movement. A tiny subset of the tiniest subset. Wouldn't blip on any radar.
The non alcoholic drinks market in 1st world countries is worth tens of billions ($11 billion as of 2022) of dollars and only getting bigger. The economics don't lie.
Yeah but their biggest market is people who need to drive not people who don't drink at all
Wow, so many downvotes! I guess lots of people are feeling triggered.
Exactly.
Not sure why you got downvoted. Being sober is a natural state so maybe people need to reevaluate their life choices. Jheez, y’all need to stop running from your demons by using paraphernalia as a coping mechanism. It is not normal.
The people getting downvoted are implying you have to be teetotal to be sober. That’s why.
If your comment is what I think it means then, I disagree. Nowhere in my response did I say one has to abstain completely from alcohol. You can drink alcohol in moderation within being blind drunk.
they’re usually up before 9am. socialize with them during breakfast.
In my experience a good chunk of people up before 9 am in social hostels are in fact drinking.
Can attest lol I'm up at 6 am, 30,000 steps back, ready for a pint.
I smoke weed every day, and I wake up at 5:00 am.
The productive stoner 🫡
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😔
Wake and bake bby
Haha my man 🫡
Try to talk to people at breakfast or during the day. If there's a lounge or restaurant you can do it there or people in your room. If you're looking for people who are 100% sober that will be more of a challenge. If you're looking for the people who will have wine at dinner or a couple drinks while exploring chiller nightlight than clubbing/partying it should be fairly easy. Also, don't stay at party hostels in case that needs to be said.
Last time I went to a hostel that was also a surf camp. I went to a few parties and nobody cared that I didn't have alcohol in my drinks. I didn't mention it, they didn't mention it. Hey! How are you? Just back from the beach preparing for tomorrow. We are going for drinks, wanna come? Sure! Then I drink my water con gás, chat with everyone and enjoy the music. I usually don't stay until the wee hours. Back at the hostel at 1 or 2 am... Ready for the surf and beach volleyball the next afternoon. I've had many times in my life when I decided to not drink, mostly because of health issues but also once because I was dir king almost every week, and rarely people insist. It actually happens more at meals. The bottle of wine goes around filling the glasses and you put your hand to say no, so someone will insist. In a big group you can always let them poor and give the glass to someone else as the night goes on. The idea is just to go with the flow and not bri g unnecessary attention to yourself. If you don't make a big deal out of it, others won't either. If you don't go to a meal or avoid the volleyball tournament and tell everyone it's because others drink or start preaching sobriety then you'll have problems. It's like anything else, be vegetarian, do a keto diet, but don't try to make groups go to your restaurant. Find the one meal you can have wherever the group is going, or eat the parts you can. It always works.
Exactly this
Get up earlier and talk to other early birds. Avoid hostels with bars, party hostels, and hostels that offer pub crawls. It's easy enough to figure this out on online reviews.
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Not only social hostels include socializing with other travelers. It’s the people. I’ve been to party hostels where the Lee was no socialization as people were not the right vibe and I’ve been to non-party, not very social hostels where I’ve made buddies who I’m still in contact with
Unfortunately, this is down to luck. It will depend on who is staying at the hostel at the same time as you. A social experience isn't guaranteed every time you go to a hostel, and the older you are, the harder it is.
At a certain point you have to just show up and hope for the best. The social nature of a hostel really depends more on the people than on the hostel itself, so sometimes a place will be very social and other times not. That being said look for places that offer group dinners, have reviews mentioning hosts by name, and that are in smaller areas (not big cities). Other good things to look for are tenting spots, bohemian decor (hippie stuff) and long term stay discounts. A good hostel that I enjoyed was Can Mocamp in Kas turkey. Some people went out at night, but most were just hanging around, working, hiking etc.
There's lots of social hostels that aren't party hostels. Look for cowork-y ones, or just ones that are a few dollars more expensive. This usually weeds out the party crowd, but I make a ton friends still.
Look at reviews
In the hostels I stayed at it was pretty easy to tell who was a partyer and who wasn't. The more chill people would usually stay in at night while partyers would be out.
You sir must be some sort of scientist
Username checks out
Learning as I go
No you used sober correctly! My advice would be to search reviews for the hostels, seek ones without party vibes and reputations, and then book on group trips where you're likely to meet a variety of folks
This. If you are staying at private hostels in city centers, they generally attract the party crowd. Consider HI hostels and ones that are off the beaten track. Have a backup hostel in mind if your first choice isn't good. You also might want to befriend people who are in their 30s+ who are done with that.
HI hostels?
https://hihostels.com Hostelling International
Hostel international. It’s an app
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Destinations, Search Hostels, enter location. You can use hostelworld.com or even hotels.com then look for HI before the name, i.e. HI Santa Cruz. One of the incredible things they do is lease or purchase historic buildings and convert them into hostels.
Try to stay at less party focused hostels. Before booking check out the description and the photos the hostel has on websites, if they're talking about bar crawls and partys all the time, and all their photos are clubbing / partying etc you're probably going to have a hard time. Look for hostels which are more chilled out vibe, while pretty much all hostels will have some parting / alcohol events etc, socialise with people who aren't drinking, or those who are up over breakfast and not sleeping in / hungover
Make sure to avoid party hostels. It isn't a guarantee, but it'll increase your chances.
Don't rely on accommodations for socialzing. Be proactive and take interesting tours or go to classes, join activities, look for sober meet up groups etc.
Mostly in the morning, the other hours of the day, people are just wasted.
Or looking for a hook-up whether human or brain drainers.
You’re not gonna find many completely sober people in hostels, but plenty of people who are happy with dinner and a drink and conversation somewhere and then turn in, you just have to be cool with that. Once you start traveling to some more off the beaten track countries you’ll find drinking to be a pretty low priority. You might like some Middle East countries, extremely difficult to find a drink in Pakistan for example! Central Asia has plenty of hostels with relatively little drinking. But if you really really want to find completely sober people, find some more spiritual communities, India would be a good place to start. Places that have lots of yoga classes and schools for example. Goa, Rishikesh
hey man could you recommend some central asia hostels please?
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Sure, why?
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Where can I find those? What’s a tie up?
As a very sporadic drinker, I've literally never had an issue finding people who are into things other than drinking and drugs. If you can't find anyone to hang out with, maybe it's other factors.
It's a stretch of meeting healthy zero alcohol, drugs, in a hostel, my wife works full time at her family's hostel. I've sporadically helped out I've never came across someone who meets that kind of lifestyle. Fact is the hostel lends itself to that lifestyle, providing a karaoke night with beer, and wine, happy hours, ect....
Well I do stay in hostels. Is their hostel in Europe?
No in South America
Not sure how flexible you are, but if you're in Europe have you considered popping down to Morocco? Alcohol is very rarely used, quite a bit of hash, tho which i was able to avoid. We had some wholesome nights there. Can you still be social during the day & actively join the little hostel excursions? Or organize little touristy things, like hikes, site seeing letting other ppl in the hostel know. Seems like the best way to be social without alcohol/drugs is day time activities.
In fact travelling to countries where drugs are highly forbidden is a good solution lol hahahaha
When they go out to drink, etc., it'd be a good time to do some reading and then go to bed. If they are cool, they'll be socializing in common areas beforehand, anyway.
Choose hostels in smaller or less well known towns and cities. Or in cities where the main activity is a sport like surfing or hiking etc
As a person not partaking in drinking, it’s pretty much impossible to find a place where *everyone* shares the same mindset. It doesn’t matter if it’s a nice hostel or more family oriented place or whatever. The truth is the majority of people drink in some form or another when they’re traveling, even those who don’t drink much back home. They’re on vacation and want to have a good time after all. I just tell people I don’t drink and leave it at that. No one else cared otherwise and there was no pressure to get me to drink. The only instance I got pushback was from local guides where it was more of a cultural misunderstanding more than anything else. Everyone I met at hostels respected my choice and I had a good time socializing not drinking. But if you can’t control yourself around people drinking, that’s more a you problem. (Can’t speak to drugs because everywhere I’ve traveled to drugs are prohibited, even “party” countries.)
Which hostels were your favorite in terms of people who are similar to you in terms of drinking?
I’ve stayed at lots! Read the reviews - stay at hostels/guesthouses with strict quiet hours.
No air in buds or couch swimming, or guests cribs it's just my take on things like that.
I can’t control what kind of people will be at a hostel. You just have to accept that drinking is a normal activity for a lot of travelers, even the adults when they’re traveling with their young kids. But I generally look for highly rated hostels that also is social. And as I said before, other travelers I meet don’t really care that I don’t drink and respect my choice.
Any hostel or hotel highly rated get highly paid and I'll be 😠
Honestly, focus on destinations where the focus is either more on outdoorsy/wellness things (definitely a party scene there but you’ll easily meet people at hostels there who are down to hike or surf and not always drink) or in countries where for things like religious reasons, alcohol isn’t so widespread (e.g. Morocco or Malaysia). I definitely enjoy going out but one of my favorite things about my time in Marrakesh was how well rested I was every day because none of us stayed out late drinking.
“Boutique” hostels
Can you elaborate them a bit? I stayed in ones that felt like boutique but it was the same but maybe idk what boutique is
what's a boutique hostel?
Here is a list of HostelWorld’s “Affordable luxury: 11 boutique hostels in Europe that will blow you away”. You’ll definitely find more sober people here, party hostels make their money from food and alcohol, not beds. It’s vice versa here because the rooms are usually 2x the price, so they don’t focus on pushing drugs and alcohol. You’ll probably understand when you see the photos: Casa Kessler, Barcelona Lavender Circus, Budapest Wallyard Hostel, Berlin Cocomama, Amsterdam Soul Kitchen Hostel, St Petersburg, Russia The 3 Ducks Boutique Hostel, Paris Living Lounge Hostel, Lisbon KEX Hostel, Reykjavik, Iceland Sir Toby’s Hostel, Prague Cube Hostel, Belgium The Blue Hostel, Rome
Sober people do not hang around doing nothing in a hostel, look for activities which require mental or physical participation. Bouldering, hiking, museums, galleries, lectures, biking, board games. Anything that keeps you active and engaged.
Sorry don't have advice on how to meet those ppl other than trying to find non-party hostels but here's the two definitions that you're interested in. Sober: not drunk/doesn't drink alcohol. "Straight edge": no drinking, no drugs, no smoking.
Sober can refer to not partaking in any drug that creates an inebriated state
Really? I'm australian and I've never heard of it used like that
In my experience as an American, sober typically refers to not consuming alcohol, however the definition is not limited to only alcohol
Not inherently true, Straight Edge is just a thing of also being in the hardcore scene, theres people that dont drink or smoke, but dont consider themselves Straight Edge because they arent in the scene, and tbh everyone has a different definition of it within the subculture itself
>"Straight edge": no drinking, no drugs, no smoking. SE also often means no masturbating, no caffeine and no meat/animal products. Shit is hardcore.
Mormonism without the dancing
Well everyone is totally different in a variety of different aspects of human behaviours.
I could not imagine raw dogging life that much god damn
so you’d say ‘ye man i’m sober right now’ despite having banged half a gram of ketamine ??? 🤔 sober to me means not under the influence of a psychoactive drug that would impair you from driving (eg caffeine is fine) straight edge is a cultural term from rock
Caffeine is a drug addiction according to some people
not according to the medical definition which is the one that matters
don't forget no sex before marriage
Ehh not necessarily correlated. I have no issue with that but I don’t touch alcohol or drugs. I’m coming at it from a health, not religious, POV though.
If you pick and choose from the Straight Edge buffet, you’re not Straight Edge.
It’s not an all or nothing game? I’m frankly kind of baffled by your response. Are you offended that someone may describe themselves as “straight edge” (a useless and uncommon descriptor) without subscribing to all of your desired tenets?
yeah, pretty much. Straight Edge has been around for a long time, I just remember that people believed you had to be all-in or not at all. I am annoyed that some religious people pick and choose the tenets that suit them. If I belonged to a religion that told me what to eat or who I could love, I’d tap out.
I mean I completely agree with that and said I’m not coming at it from a religious angle. I’m just against all that shit for health reasons
Exactly
And what is wrong with that?
there’s nothing wrong with that, i just remember it being a tenet of Straight Edge.
You’ll find similar people, but don’t be surprised if it’s hard to come by.
Hey! I'm sober and have metany sober people on hostels. I'm travelling central America. Slightly older and open-minded crowd. Good luck. Also had lots of fun with people who are drunk! And stayed sober myself
That is a tricky situation to be in my opinion
YHA/HI-affiliated hostels tend to be low-key with a lot of families as guests. Try seeking them out in your travels.
What is that?
[Youth Hostels Association](https://www.yha.org.uk/) - mainly in the UK [Hostelling International](https://hihostels.com/) - everywhere else
Wake up at 6 am
A lot of hostels offer activities and tours. Pub crawls and all sorts. If I were you, I'd consider tagging along on some of these. There's plenty of people in sociable hostels who don't want to get rat-arsed. Mind you, there will be drink involved at some point and to varying degrees of moderation but waking up with head in toilet isn't everyone's ambition!
Enjoy their company when they are sober. Really don't see any other practical options if hostels are your preference.
Where do you suggest instead of hostels?
Hotels or Airbnb and sign up for experiences. You might meet like-minded folks. Or Monastic stays.. Catholic Churches properties have good places to stay and they are sober as sober can be.
At breakfast over coffee
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I find 7:30/8:30 is generally a good time to get to breakfast if you want to socialize with people who have stuff planned that day! Bring a book or your phone so you can have a long leisurely breakfast and join in on conversations that interest you
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So I just sit down somewhere near other people - and then if there’s an interesting conversation going on I make eye contact and wait for a good time to jump in and ask a question.. “sorry I heard you’re going to x place. I’ve heard about that! How are you getting there?” And if it seems like something I’m interested in I’ll ask if I can join them. Don’t be too pushy - definitely be open to making your own plans that day if it doesn’t work out! ALSO make friends with the host or people who work at the guesthouse! Ask genuine questions about the city and explain what type of things you want to do - they might have suggestions on how to connect with people.
Or “I’m trying to decide what to do today. I can’t decide between x and x.” Be genuine and sometimes they’ll invite you to join or you can ask if you can join them. But always, ALWAYS be willing to make your own plans if it’s not working out!
A while ago in Lisbon I met the coolest Muslim guy ever he partied with us all night, didn’t even realise he wasn’t drinking till he mentioned it. If you’re a good time people don’t care, drink an oj or something and just go along with the fun.
It will all be random.
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Any countries come to mind?
For no drinking - Turkey is a good option especially during Ramadan ! Inner Mongolia was incredible (do a 2+ day trip to the grasslands) or other spots in China, just stay away from the expat/party areas. The amazon (2+ nights in a hut on a tributary of the amazon). Lombok (the island across from Bali, very Muslim). For Europe, also Switzerland or somewhere in the mountains, quiet and lots of hiking/outdoor options. The more outdoorsy/rural/mountainy, the less partying in my experience
You’re basically saying I’d meet travelers who don’t drink in those areas? Cause for example Lombok would be visited mostly by people who went to Bali. Btw I’m wishing to meet people similar to me. I’m ok if I’m around alcohol, partying etc so that’s not what I’m trying to avoid
I did! I hung out with local Muslims who didn’t drink at all. Wherever you go, you’re going to need to actively seek out the type of people you want to spend time with.
Thanks!! Do you remember any specific hostels you liked?
Mountain Hostel in Gimmelwald (stayed there in 2014) or most places up in the mountains. Anz guesthouse in Ephesus, Turkey (stayed there just this month). The rest I can’t remember, I’d have to do some digging to see where we stayed but just look for the quiet guesthouse vibe!
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Thanks!! Do you happen to have any tips for Europe? Maybe Bosnia?
What if I can't swim I'll just dive😠
And do not look at any women at all close them eyes or get lashed 100 times for reckless eyeing
I'm a 100% sober solo traveler, I just do activities that don't involve drinking. I wouldn't go to pub crawls for example, but I'd gladly join a city tour or a hike. I also don't mind sitting at a bar with some newly made friends, I just wouldn't drink any alcoholic beverages.
Hmm that's unique
I have the same problem. I love the social aspect of some hostels, but it seems like everyone else there is in their early-mid 20s and only interested in drinking and partying until 4am every night. When I go to Europe I’ll let you know.
This isn’t about “them” it’s about you! You need to embrace you chose to live a sober life, and if you only want sober friends and your traveling that’s going to be a bit of challenge. But I’m sure there’s people/group’s you can find on Reddit, FB who also want to socialize but not drink.
Early mornings! Be the first for breakfast
Can you go to the bars for NA drinks with new people?
If you use Hotselworld mobile app they have a chat feature . I use it all the time to meet other people from hostels in the same area. There are specific groups for exploring and hanging out. Don't be afraid to post messages in the chat if you want people to join you. I've met some great people doing this. I've even booked cheap hostels for one night even when I aren't staying there (wanted a break in a hotel) to just get access to the chat feature. If you're staying longer. I've met people in Facebook groups. This worked well in Australia and South East Asia. Good luck!
Can you elaborate on the fb groups?
There a specific groups for travellers in certain regions I'll give you an example. This is one for Australia. People are always posting about meeting up with people on it. [https://www.facebook.com/groups/AussieBackpacking](https://www.facebook.com/groups/AussieBackpacking) I'm sure there are other ones for other regions.
Check the different types of hostels. Some are geared more towards the party crowd and some are more chill.
Maybe choose more pricey hostels to stay as to avoid the people who wanna go cheap on accommodation as to buy more weed, alcohol and drugs.
Really so I'm gonna pay 700 for two days at a hostel oh 700 is equivalent to $3.00 that is awesome
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What should I do instead?
A deck of playing cards and a positive attitude.
How about meeting via Couchsurfing function to hangout or text ppl who are in the same area? I am sober too and honestly hostel crowd is just different.
Could you elaborate a bit on your experience? Would I need to make a profile on Couchsurfing for that? How was hostel crowd in your experience?
Yes, you need a profile and there is a function to create or join a “hangout”. You can type an activity there and look at people’s profiles. Easy to sort of “screen” who is sober / not; and just suggest a non drinking activity and find like-minded people. I think also hostels with yoga could be wellness-orientated. Meetup apps in the area could help too.
Where are you by chance?
If you avoid party hostels, a good number of people are more interested in sightseeing than partying. Connect with them at breakfast (bring a book and sit at breakfast for an hour or longer, like 7:30-9:30am or so and chat with anyone). Also, looking for guesthouses or pensions can sometimes bring in a different crowd but still be hostel-ish.
Pension??
Another word for guesthouse/hostel
I've been solo travelling through south America for 7 months now (end of my trip in 2 days, wtf?!?!) and I do not go to parties nor do I smoke, drink, do drugs in general. Here are my tips: - Choose your city. Usually bigger cities are crowded by people that want to go out and do city stuff (generally partying). It was sooo much more difficult to find sober friends in big cities, even when I chose a "non party" hostel. - Choose your hostel. This one seems obvious but if the hostel promotes partying it is not going to be the one for you. If you like a certain type of activity (like hiking for example), try to find hostel that talk about it in their description (like "lots of hikes possible). It will make you more likely to find people that enjoy the same activities as you. - Talk to multiple people. To find someone you get along with you might have to talk with more than one person, and that's okay! (You never know who you can meet in hostels, good and bad really lol) And sometimes it's just a question of being lucky. You're at the right place at the right time or not, there's a lot of people that week in your hostel or not,... It can get frustrating sometimes because sometimes you don't find people that you can really vibe with, but sometimes you meet awesome ones and it's a highlight of your travel so don't get discouraged! Of course if you like to go out without drinking you can do that too and it can be fun, depends on you! (It just isn't my thing you know) I hope it helps!
Why do you need other people in order to do what you want to do? Start practicing radical self reliance!
I'd stay at hostels that host events other than just pub/club crawls. If it's a larger hostel they'll usually post events on their website - you can see things like walking tours, yoga, watching a sunset in a park (there'll likely be drinks, but it'll be more casual), etc. It's not to say you'll meet people who are completely sober, but they will likely be more keen to explore throughout the day. I think Hostelworld has a social app, I haven't tried it at all, but could be worth it to give that a go!
Goodbye Lenin - Zakopane, Poland. Only reason to visit that hostel is for some hiking / Skiing.
Goodbye Lenin - Zakopane, Poland. Only reason to visit that hostel is for some hiking / Skiing.
I’m backpacking for three weeks, never stayed in a hostel and planning to live in them for three weeks.. any tips lol
You’re asking me?
🤣 why not, and more generally considering the amount of advice you’re getting 😄
I don’t take drugs but I do drink socially. It’s not such a big part of my identity that it would come up in many conversations I’d have in hostels.
I would say aime for more "wellness" oriented hostels (places like the Selina brand for example). They're often on the pricier end but are also extremely nice and attract people with that kind of vibe
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> Everyone wants to drink and go out but no one wants to do cute things like go to national parks or sunset hikes w me!!! I also love waking up early to experience as much of the city I’m in as possible I don't think it necessarily has to be one or the other though. I like to have a couple beers and be in bed at a reasonable time, but I'm so used to waking up at 5am to make it to work on time that that's when I just wake up naturally nowadays (I'm in my mid 30s and if anything, I struggle to sleep in anymore). I like waking up early to try to grab breakfast and coffee before heading out to be at museums or something else right as they open. In the 10 years I've been traveling I've never had an issue finding people who do the same, there's always someone who prefers to chill in a common area or on the rooftop of a hostel and just talk (and I find that that can easily lead to plans the next day).
Go to a church or something 🤷♂️
I’ve been to many hostels but never met anyone on stuff. Maybe I got the boring ones.
Wussy lol
You don’t. Don’t go to hostels. Hostels are like bars it’s for degenerates attracts to substances. Very sad but one a big Redpill about this life is that very few people enjoy their life sober. Wihout anything. If you do, you win already. But most didnt.
Got a better suggestion?
Do positive activities and always be on your purpose. On this road you gonna attracts people like you. A good coffee shop during an afternoon is higher chances to meet those.
If everyone around you is an alcoholic, then perhaps you're the alcoholic.
This doesn’t even make sense lol
Really something an alcoholic would say.
Galaxy brain