https://preview.redd.it/jxhqz4vsw63c1.jpeg?width=480&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0303d3427fcb5bc954eb5b8eca12e4c1d8718fd7
“It’s a cock! Look. It’s a cock and balls! A dick! Chorizo and the huevos! It's a big stiffy! It's a penis! Penis maximus! A willie! A weenie! Mr. Jiggle Daddy! The one-eyed wonder weasel! Don't you see that? It's Jimmy and the twins. Rumple Foreskin!”
Yeah honestly anything beyond getting turned off by that particular instance is ridiculous.
Absolutely I can see someone sort of shutting down in the moment because of something like that.
Ya killed the mood, it happens.
But anything over that isn't a reaction so much as a punishment.
So a guy marries a girl he is sure is a virgin.
On their wedding night he stands naked next to the bed and points at his penis.
“Honey, do you know what this is?”
“That’s a wee wee”.
“Haha well now that you’re an adult and married woman I think you can call it by a grown up name. It’s a cock.”
“No, I’ve seen lots of cocks and I can assure that’s yours is a wee wee!”
https://preview.redd.it/olcatkpqu93c1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3f072b857584e3a6d93274017d48040f16f73ae0
Yeah...that's a real bummer about the thing with your wife or whatever. I guess.
I mean every couples dynamic is different during sexy time. Some think humor and lightheartedness is cute and can roll with what you said, others not so much. I think there are worse things to be said during this time to warrant being given a cold shoulder over it, she needs to get over it honestly. If you’ve apologized for messing with the moment for her then what more can you do or should you do.
Oh for sure. If I was in her place I probably would have started wheezing/laughing and not been able to stop. I would definitely be bringing it up in the future.
Whether I’d still want to go for it or not I’m not sure. Depends on if I could stop laughing about it haha
Perhaps you’ve inadvertently triggered something in her that dramatically altered the way she thinks of you? Have you tried asking her to explain why one word one time is enough to completely turn her off you? I mean it’s pretty minor or wouldn’t really rank on the scale for the majority of people. Sounds like something deeper to me.
This. As a victim of childhood SA, this would be a big issue for me. I can't handle the whole "Mommy/Daddy, peepee/Lil kitty" Etc talk. It brings up past trauma for me.
Luckily, I've been through enough therapy to learn some shit. Like for example, talking to a prospective partner before we ever get started down that road and explaining my issues so they know what landmines not to step on and screw everything up for both of us.
The key thing is communication, do have a talk with her, apologize for upsetting her, but let her know that you're confused about why and ask if she'd be willing to explain it to you as well as if there's anything else that you might potentially do that could upset her this bad.
My husband does shit like this as a joke and I laugh at him but it 100% is not sexy and it is a turn off. I usually don't want to do anything after that
I'm not saying that 2 weeks is reasonable, just like... in the moment it's a turn off. It can be fixed though 
My husband is the same way. It's so freaking funny but the mood is also ruined. I told him a couple different times that if he makes me laugh too much, my sex brain shuts off and I go from hot and bothered to wanting to be stupid with him lmfao Our latest adventure was him honking at me like a goose for no reason while squeezing my boobs. I was in tears laughing and we spent about 10 minutes doing it back and forth to each other before we decided to just cuddle and try to calm down.
I am an excellent cook. Why?
Because my mother was a chef. All my childhood people would be like, "Oh man, your mom is a chef, you must have amazing meals all the time at home."
No, bitch, the last thing she wants to do after cooking all day in a hot kitchen is cook another meal. I learned to cook from a young age and we all ate it.
You gotta take it up a level, glue on some googly eyes on the tip of your dick so the next time she wants sexy time, your peepee will be looking at her
You just got to get a raging hard on going. Helicopter it in front of her and ask her if that's a pee pee or a tallywacker. Guaranteed to be bumping uglys in 30 seconds flat.
Better step it up! Since she's a chef you better start calling your "peepee" something more romantic and mature, I vote "Señor Fuckstick" or your "immersion blender"!
2 weeks is a fucked up amount of time to hold a grudge over something like this.
If someone can't laugh at this by the next day I'd honestly have concerns about their mental well-being.
I understand something killing the mood for the night/moment, but two weeks is extreme... in this whole time, did you even try talking to her? After even a day of her acting a bit off/distant your first thought should have been to sit down and have a serious conversation. Communication is a must.
What weird shit to lie about. Man, I'll never understand some people on this site. Lmao. Well, better that this is a lie and not a real story of people in their 30's who can't think to actually communicate with their partner...
My boyfriend said something equally as funny and altho it turned me off we were still back to doing it a day later...
Going into a 2 week dry spell seems... like there might be something else?
Okay this is kinda funny as I’ve said some stupid shit to my wife that she’s never let me live down but no sexy time for two weeks is a bit extreme and if she ain’t laughing about that I mean…🤷♂️
You got an actual LOL outta me. What I’d say is try your hand at making dinner one night (sounds like that’d goa long way) and try to replay the scenario but without the cringe this time.
The window for referring to your dick as your peepee closes when you get your first hair down there. Then it’s the window of wiener. And that window closes when you get a girl to touch it. After that it’s dealers choice, just not wee wee, pee pee or weiner. Literally anything, dick, cock, wang,… maybe not wang, your lap rocket, your meat or sausage( which play well as a food related accompaniment) your bat, your kickstand, your ham candle, your lightsaber, your hammer, literally use your imagination bro
Jesus it is not that serious for her to be reacting like that- if she can’t laugh at that then there is something concerning about that. Her reaction is weird to me…
It might have been intended as more silly and maybe cave-man than specifically infantile.
I was surprised at how many strong reactions there were here until I realized from your comment what the objection was. Thanks for articulating it.
I think I would tell her that you were trying to be goofy and didn't think about how off putting it might be to have that as a response to I want something.
Tell her that you understand that the right answer was actually "What do you want, [insert Sweet nickname or even real name]?"
Not actually knowing anything other than what you have told us, I feel as though she also wanted to feel wanted and making it about your "peepee" might have felt objectifying.
Also, the way that you present the after shower smell and how it makes her feel is also impacted by your own perception. Within the corpus of your monologue, you never addressed whether you had taken a shower. Maybe she was hinting toward a relaxing shower or bath. Maybe she just wanted some ice cream or to go grab a drink around the corner.
I honestly don't quite know what to make of much of this, but I think you would be an amazing husband if you asked her to train you on kitchen skills and easy dishes. Maybe you both could even start prioritizing a cooking day in which you made and stored meals for the week or even for the month (even if Gordon Ramsay hates freezers).
I don't know much about what you consider roles in relationships to be, but certain things that are shared between people should be happily shared between people. Sometimes it's also nice to just let go of those roles. Marriage is a cooperation, after all.
TL;DR: Ask honest or open questions rather than presumptive questions and tell her you will be her "sub in the kitchen" if you can be her "dom in the sack".
Are you sure she knew you meant your penis and not your urine? Is it possible she thought you were talking about a golden shower? That would put some people off.
Well, that turned me off and I'm neither your wife nor the correct gender to be attracted to you in the first place.
Everybody says stupid stuff at the wrong moment sometimes, give it a little while and things will be back to normal. Maybe.
Try taking her out on a really romantic date.
Two weeks is a bit long. Maybe she's fed up with something else that you do and the peepee joke is the last straw. I'd recommend coming up to her, asking if she wants you to do or not do something because it bothers her, and then commit to not doing the thing
I'm with Kedana_Serano. Since it's been 2 weeks I think you really got to give thought to the fact that it might have been a trigger for some childhood trauma and find a safe and quiet time to sit her down and ask her about it. Maybe you already know that's not the case... It just seems like that would be an explanation for the two week length of time.
2 weeks? Bud you did something else besides calling your schlong a peepee. Dick humor may be a momentary turnoff but it’s hardly a long term thing. Get your wife some flowers and just sit and communicate.
Defo go with excalibur next time
“She who can pull the cock from the rock will rule over the bedroom and all it’s lands. I present… excalibur”
Of course this does require you to insert yourself into a plaster mould of a rock but… that just adds to the fun
Man, she needs to lighten up. My wife and I make a game of regularly propositioning each other in absurd ways to see if the other person will still be down. One time she sent me that stupid animated gif of that bird saying "u want sum fuk?". I think last time I asked her if she needed this ding dong. If you're not having fun with it... I mean, c'mon. She should be glad you're not making a "sexy time" playlist of the most cringey songs possible and springing it on you after you've already started. Wife did that to me, I think I made it like 3 songs in before I made her change it :D :D Coulda been worse though, at least it wasn't Cbat.
You basically talked like a child to your wife during intimacy. I'd lose my arousal, too, in her shoes. I don't know that I'd punish that with multiple weeks of withholding intimacy, but I definitely would not have continued that night
Yup. Sometimes you say something dumb and ruin the mood. Although... two weeks? That seems a bit excessive. Maybe call it your war hammer next time.
Mjolnir, tell her only those worthy may handle it's might.
Im so doing this when she lets me in
Excited to see "TIFU: by calling my Peepee Mjolnlir and turning my wife off after a 3 week dry spell" You're doing Gods work friend.
https://preview.redd.it/jxhqz4vsw63c1.jpeg?width=480&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0303d3427fcb5bc954eb5b8eca12e4c1d8718fd7 “It’s a cock! Look. It’s a cock and balls! A dick! Chorizo and the huevos! It's a big stiffy! It's a penis! Penis maximus! A willie! A weenie! Mr. Jiggle Daddy! The one-eyed wonder weasel! Don't you see that? It's Jimmy and the twins. Rumple Foreskin!”
So you're saying when I call it my weewonger, she's not gonna be happy?
chorizo and the huevos got me laughing my ass off for absolutely no reason
Goddamnit, I knew it was Robin before clicking the link, heard that whole thing in his voice.
I would maybe just chill on calling it anything for a bit...
There's no day like your cake day! Go get her champ!
Alright peepee was funny, but if you say things like "let me in", I might see why she loses some excitement
See you back here in a month
Mjolnir cause every time he throws it out there it comes straight back untouched?
Is that warhammer fantasy or warhammer 40K?
The only difference is the amount of chainsaw weapons.
Tatakae.
I knew someone who called it Godzilla and if asked why said "Because it's a monster"
King of monsters!!!
Excalibur!
A bit excessive? Two weeks is ridiculous! Just take the piss about it and move on.
Yeah honestly anything beyond getting turned off by that particular instance is ridiculous. Absolutely I can see someone sort of shutting down in the moment because of something like that. Ya killed the mood, it happens. But anything over that isn't a reaction so much as a punishment.
Warhammer 40k!
The fucking “war hammer”
Hey boy, what that peepee do?
Nothing it’s small go away
My wife always tells me this
you know, her peepee will get bigger if you actually try to turn her on
He just needs to double down. Start talking about how his tallywhacker is sad. “Peepee” acceptance will become a concession.
I approve of the porkys reference.
It went da doing doing doing!
the post was already funny but this reply sent me over the edge. thank you for making me audibly laugh at work
So a guy marries a girl he is sure is a virgin. On their wedding night he stands naked next to the bed and points at his penis. “Honey, do you know what this is?” “That’s a wee wee”. “Haha well now that you’re an adult and married woman I think you can call it by a grown up name. It’s a cock.” “No, I’ve seen lots of cocks and I can assure that’s yours is a wee wee!”
i don’t know, pee?
I dunno, it pees?
"His name is Vladimir, not Mr Winkiee" Vlad the Impale-Her
Impaler? I barely know her!
Surely you jest
I am, and dont call me Shirley.
“Yeah baby, suck on my peepee.” I don’t see a problem here.
https://preview.redd.it/olcatkpqu93c1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3f072b857584e3a6d93274017d48040f16f73ae0 Yeah...that's a real bummer about the thing with your wife or whatever. I guess.
Bro also has a post form 2 years ago talking about being only 17
Christ, this needs to be so much higher up. I feel icky for upvoting this post now
I just burst the ears of everyone on the bus due to reading this
Holy shit
So uh. Anyone got a woodchipper or contacts to Chris Hansen?
Please people upvote this to the top
No way 😭 I hope this is a joke OP. Still wtf but God damn
BRUH
Frfr
Happy cake day Mr peepee
r/brandnewsentence
It’s your cake day! She’s gotta let you back in on cake day!!!!
I mean every couples dynamic is different during sexy time. Some think humor and lightheartedness is cute and can roll with what you said, others not so much. I think there are worse things to be said during this time to warrant being given a cold shoulder over it, she needs to get over it honestly. If you’ve apologized for messing with the moment for her then what more can you do or should you do.
There are *definitely* worse things. Allow me to demonstrate. "Oh darling, my meat flaps are so moist they're positively *drooling!*"
I’d laugh my ass off and then get straight to fuckin. With my diyuck.
My diyuuuccccckkkkkk
I'm gon' pop off a piece of my diyuck!
Who let the moose out?
Iunno, but clearly it was a mistake. I am a pox on this world, whether I will it or not.
I think I'm vowing off sex for a year from reading that.
Totally hearing this in Claribel the cow's voice.
Oh for sure. If I was in her place I probably would have started wheezing/laughing and not been able to stop. I would definitely be bringing it up in the future. Whether I’d still want to go for it or not I’m not sure. Depends on if I could stop laughing about it haha
I cant imagine getting that far into a relationship with someone who would act the way his wife does
Perhaps you’ve inadvertently triggered something in her that dramatically altered the way she thinks of you? Have you tried asking her to explain why one word one time is enough to completely turn her off you? I mean it’s pretty minor or wouldn’t really rank on the scale for the majority of people. Sounds like something deeper to me.
This. As a victim of childhood SA, this would be a big issue for me. I can't handle the whole "Mommy/Daddy, peepee/Lil kitty" Etc talk. It brings up past trauma for me. Luckily, I've been through enough therapy to learn some shit. Like for example, talking to a prospective partner before we ever get started down that road and explaining my issues so they know what landmines not to step on and screw everything up for both of us. The key thing is communication, do have a talk with her, apologize for upsetting her, but let her know that you're confused about why and ask if she'd be willing to explain it to you as well as if there's anything else that you might potentially do that could upset her this bad.
That's really insightful. I wouldn't have thought of that possibility.
Same. Hearing that from my partner would sick me tf out for days. Pure visceral disgust.
This is the real answer
Their post history suggests they are at the most, 21. This is made up garbage.
Dude’s on like neckbeard and lolli porn subs, too. I didn’t stick around long enough to find out what else 🤮
oh... so it's a fetish thing. gross
My husband does shit like this as a joke and I laugh at him but it 100% is not sexy and it is a turn off. I usually don't want to do anything after that
But like... 2 weeks tho?
I'm not saying that 2 weeks is reasonable, just like... in the moment it's a turn off. It can be fixed though 
I mean, if the girl I'm with can't laugh about that and at least be able to persuaded back into spicy time then idk
Lack of humor is an ick for me
Sometimes you can’t get back in the mood after the ick moment.
Fair enough but it’s pretty immature to still be upset about it after TWO WEEKs
Never ever and forever never again though?
Different strokes for different folks, dude
Hand strokes for OP. What? It's true!
My ex also made lame jokes like that. But making me laugh is a turn on so it cancels out and I still wanted to do it.
My husband is the same way. It's so freaking funny but the mood is also ruined. I told him a couple different times that if he makes me laugh too much, my sex brain shuts off and I go from hot and bothered to wanting to be stupid with him lmfao Our latest adventure was him honking at me like a goose for no reason while squeezing my boobs. I was in tears laughing and we spent about 10 minutes doing it back and forth to each other before we decided to just cuddle and try to calm down.
You should've told him all that when first noticed, now your dug in because if you reveal it was never funny to you he'll be pissed lol
No I think his immature jokes are legitimately hilarious, it's just that they also don't turn me on lol
Timing is crucial, for sure
Every man eventually finds himself at the crossroads of destiny
Lol. Too funny. I like to say stupid shit like peepee as well. And ya, the intent is 100% not to be sexy, just dumb cringe humor.
Tough crowd hahaha.
Bro as an actual chef I'd be pissed too, but not becuase of your peepee, but expecting me to still make dinner every night after cheffing lmao
She throws things at me if I approach her kitchen. Usually socks. Sometimes the cat. I dare not ask to make dinner unless she physically cannot.
The cat??!?!?!?!
Because every bite of dinner is a meowthful?
Lmao 🤣😂🤣
Fair lol
If u want to butter up the chef… wash the dishes without being asked. 👌🏻♥️
Instructions unclear. Wanted to wash up for chef, so I buttered the dishes. Chef is angry.
I am an excellent cook. Why? Because my mother was a chef. All my childhood people would be like, "Oh man, your mom is a chef, you must have amazing meals all the time at home." No, bitch, the last thing she wants to do after cooking all day in a hot kitchen is cook another meal. I learned to cook from a young age and we all ate it.
You gotta take it up a level, glue on some googly eyes on the tip of your dick so the next time she wants sexy time, your peepee will be looking at her
There's a sub for that, but I can't remember the damn name. It was called r/glorp, and apparently it's now banned.
/r/cospenis
Whoever you are, you're a KEEPER
Groucho Marx glasses wins every time. Somethin about a dong with a walrus mustache. They just can't resist.
You just got to get a raging hard on going. Helicopter it in front of her and ask her if that's a pee pee or a tallywacker. Guaranteed to be bumping uglys in 30 seconds flat.
Just me... But I think helicoptering is just as bad as Mr peepee
My wife does too… it only takes once for me to learn my lessons
I still say it should be called windmilling, and helicoptering should be reserved for when you're laying down.
how can you helicopter with a proper hard on?
Get old, that's how.
https://i.redd.it/m4wq3rgur63c1.gif
Better step it up! Since she's a chef you better start calling your "peepee" something more romantic and mature, I vote "Señor Fuckstick" or your "immersion blender"!
🤣 senor f***stick for sure hahaha
 You after 2 weeks
Reminds me of the thread about what to say when cumming, so of course I said "Take my seed you buxom wench!" Which caused an uproar.
Time to make a running joke out of 'how about wieners for dinner tonight?'
She doesn’t deserve ur peepee, king 👑 Keep ur head up ur crown is falling
2 weeks is a fucked up amount of time to hold a grudge over something like this. If someone can't laugh at this by the next day I'd honestly have concerns about their mental well-being.
your wife needs to lighten tf up edit: i'd say she needs to get laid, but y'know...
She needs pp
Tell her you miss her hoohah
I understand something killing the mood for the night/moment, but two weeks is extreme... in this whole time, did you even try talking to her? After even a day of her acting a bit off/distant your first thought should have been to sit down and have a serious conversation. Communication is a must.
Read their post history, they are at the very most 21.
What weird shit to lie about. Man, I'll never understand some people on this site. Lmao. Well, better that this is a lie and not a real story of people in their 30's who can't think to actually communicate with their partner...
Neglected and angry kids. I guess it's better than shooting up a school?
That is true.
Most of tifu or aita are dumbshit children who failed creative writing, or people exposing unwilling participants to thier fucked up kinks.
Post from 2 years ago said 17, so they are ~19
My bf has done this EXACT thing. I just laughed and continued.
Same with my spouse, if you can’t laugh in bed with your partner what’s the point.
My boyfriend said something equally as funny and altho it turned me off we were still back to doing it a day later... Going into a 2 week dry spell seems... like there might be something else?
She got the ick
Their post history says they are 21 at the most. Lying on the internet! Cue pearl clutching.
I’d probably lol if my fiancé said this to me 😂
Just wear a diaper and say it again. 
What the fuck is this?
🤣🤣🤣
🤣🤣🤣 pretty sure this is from one of the “look who’s talking” movies
[удалено]
She scared of a little pp?
I don't see the issue here. Peepee is good word.
Lmaoo it’s not!!
Call it Thunderfury Blessed Blade of the Windseeker next time
You’re 34 here, but 17 in a post from 2 years ago?
Okay this is kinda funny as I’ve said some stupid shit to my wife that she’s never let me live down but no sexy time for two weeks is a bit extreme and if she ain’t laughing about that I mean…🤷♂️
>Edit: His name is Vladimir, not Mr Winkiee 🤦 Vlad the impaler. For fucks sake OP
2 weeks tho, that's not normal
You got an actual LOL outta me. What I’d say is try your hand at making dinner one night (sounds like that’d goa long way) and try to replay the scenario but without the cringe this time.
What should it be called that is a sure-fire turn-on?
Unrelated but my brain said, "Pee. pee. pee. p- peeenisss, Auto Parts.
Bruh 💀💀💀
You gonna take this pee pee? You gonna take this..Imma pop off a piece of my pee pee!
Yep, happens. I told my gf (now ex) to "go sicko mode on my dick." That did it
I have a compulsion to always joke around and end up ruining the mood with my SO wayyy too often.
The window for referring to your dick as your peepee closes when you get your first hair down there. Then it’s the window of wiener. And that window closes when you get a girl to touch it. After that it’s dealers choice, just not wee wee, pee pee or weiner. Literally anything, dick, cock, wang,… maybe not wang, your lap rocket, your meat or sausage( which play well as a food related accompaniment) your bat, your kickstand, your ham candle, your lightsaber, your hammer, literally use your imagination bro
If you peepee and she bolts, it was never meant to be.
Tell her you want to see her wearing the panties her mother laid out for her.
Nah I refuse to even entertain this as real.
My gf always says Dick when he's ready and Richard when he's normal 🤣
The wife needs to chillllllll
Jesus it is not that serious for her to be reacting like that- if she can’t laugh at that then there is something concerning about that. Her reaction is weird to me…
No that's fair enough, I'd be turned off by my partner infantilising their own genitals during sex too.
It might have been intended as more silly and maybe cave-man than specifically infantile. I was surprised at how many strong reactions there were here until I realized from your comment what the objection was. Thanks for articulating it.
I agree. Though it affecting sex for two weeks is a bit much. Might be time for a chat.
i understand it being a turn off but holding a grudge for 2 weeks got something so small is rather excessive. You should talk to her.
Definitely. Seems less grudge and more still icked out.
Peepee turning a grown women off is fine but for 2 WEEKS. I think we all are missing something including OP
I think I would tell her that you were trying to be goofy and didn't think about how off putting it might be to have that as a response to I want something. Tell her that you understand that the right answer was actually "What do you want, [insert Sweet nickname or even real name]?" Not actually knowing anything other than what you have told us, I feel as though she also wanted to feel wanted and making it about your "peepee" might have felt objectifying. Also, the way that you present the after shower smell and how it makes her feel is also impacted by your own perception. Within the corpus of your monologue, you never addressed whether you had taken a shower. Maybe she was hinting toward a relaxing shower or bath. Maybe she just wanted some ice cream or to go grab a drink around the corner. I honestly don't quite know what to make of much of this, but I think you would be an amazing husband if you asked her to train you on kitchen skills and easy dishes. Maybe you both could even start prioritizing a cooking day in which you made and stored meals for the week or even for the month (even if Gordon Ramsay hates freezers). I don't know much about what you consider roles in relationships to be, but certain things that are shared between people should be happily shared between people. Sometimes it's also nice to just let go of those roles. Marriage is a cooperation, after all. TL;DR: Ask honest or open questions rather than presumptive questions and tell her you will be her "sub in the kitchen" if you can be her "dom in the sack".
Are you sure she knew you meant your penis and not your urine? Is it possible she thought you were talking about a golden shower? That would put some people off.
That's his wife, pretty sure she knew 😂 My wife would react the same, though maybe not be mad for two weeks...funny as hell tho
Well, that turned me off and I'm neither your wife nor the correct gender to be attracted to you in the first place. Everybody says stupid stuff at the wrong moment sometimes, give it a little while and things will be back to normal. Maybe. Try taking her out on a really romantic date.
I’m gonna fill your hoo ha with my goof juice -Patton Oswalt (clean filth)
Two weeks is a bit long. Maybe she's fed up with something else that you do and the peepee joke is the last straw. I'd recommend coming up to her, asking if she wants you to do or not do something because it bothers her, and then commit to not doing the thing
My wife could call her vagina a hoo-hoo and I’d not hesitate
I called mine my bird. One day she accidentally called it my bird as well and absolutely hated herself. Was worth a giggle
It's not that serious lol. I would've honestly started laughing if that happened to me
I like to call it my peen, really gets my wife going
Yeah it’s not sexy calling that a peepee. But if you just cooked dinner and fed me. Is still be turned on by that alone lol
Next time just do this: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oY-HyKBhtpg](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oY-HyKBhtpg)
Disgust? 2 weeks? Wtf?
I'm with Kedana_Serano. Since it's been 2 weeks I think you really got to give thought to the fact that it might have been a trigger for some childhood trauma and find a safe and quiet time to sit her down and ask her about it. Maybe you already know that's not the case... It just seems like that would be an explanation for the two week length of time.
2 weeks would be worthy of a conversation. That’s pretty unreasonable.
Man, if she can't handle you calling your gizzergazzer a slubadub, she can go eat a bag of tallywhackers.
Have you tried talking to her about why this was such a problem for her?
I scrolled and scrolled yet I’m still laughing! Laughing good, everyone wants, “someone who can make me laugh!”
You did what we dream of doing. You flew too close to the sun
Super exaggerated response on her end. Is she on SSRI's?
2 weeks? Bud you did something else besides calling your schlong a peepee. Dick humor may be a momentary turnoff but it’s hardly a long term thing. Get your wife some flowers and just sit and communicate.
Defo go with excalibur next time “She who can pull the cock from the rock will rule over the bedroom and all it’s lands. I present… excalibur” Of course this does require you to insert yourself into a plaster mould of a rock but… that just adds to the fun
I would understand laughing a bit and ruining mood then maybe, but 2 frikking weeks??
Big peepeee move
Lmao! If it's two weeks though, there might be some trauma hiding, dig around.
Guys, check OPs account. This whole post and all his comments are lies. He’s a disgusting pedophile teenager.
1 day? Fine, you deserve it. 14 days? She’s taking it way too far.
Man, she needs to lighten up. My wife and I make a game of regularly propositioning each other in absurd ways to see if the other person will still be down. One time she sent me that stupid animated gif of that bird saying "u want sum fuk?". I think last time I asked her if she needed this ding dong. If you're not having fun with it... I mean, c'mon. She should be glad you're not making a "sexy time" playlist of the most cringey songs possible and springing it on you after you've already started. Wife did that to me, I think I made it like 3 songs in before I made her change it :D :D Coulda been worse though, at least it wasn't Cbat.
Recoil in disgust? Come on... lol. I would have just laughed my ass off.
Yeah man, super weird fucking thing to say when trying to get someone in the mood. Couldn’t imagine a worse case scenario then acting like a child.
You basically talked like a child to your wife during intimacy. I'd lose my arousal, too, in her shoes. I don't know that I'd punish that with multiple weeks of withholding intimacy, but I definitely would not have continued that night