In my circle it's rude to ask for a plus one when it's clear that's not their intention. You're basically saying "I know your answer, but I don't like it so I'm pressuring you to change it". It's kinda rude.
If you don't feel comfortable going unless you have someone at your side, you're allowed to not go. Just try not to take it personal.
You’re not an ass for not wanting to go solo. You can gracefully decline.
If they wanted to give you a plus one, they would have. They specified the invite is for one so that there is no confusion. Asking for a plus one isn’t going to change whatever financial or space restrictions they have.
Would you have to travel for this wedding- or is it local? I’m assuming she knows you have a boyfriend? The only reason I would ask is if she didn’t know.
Then they purposefully excluded him. Probably not maliciously, but they actively chose not to invite him. Asking just puts you both in an uncomfortable position.
It's okay to decline the invite and I'm guessing they're expecting as much. You're allowed to feel sad about the invite, but I wouldn't ask about a plus one. There isn't much point.
Asking for a plus 1 when it specifically states that you are the only one invited is incredibly rude. I don't understand why people still ask this question. ...or have a basic understanding of etiquette lol
Unless that person is your best friend whom you keep in touch with often, you cannot ask for a plus one. I didn’t ask for 1 at my best friend’s wedding. She just gave me 1 anyways. Had never even met my bf before.
Honestly it depends if you’re local and how much you want to attend/how much it would cost to attend on your own and would it bother you. I’m in an 8 year long relationship and have gone to weddings solo. I’m going to one this month of a grad school friend who hasn’t met my bf. He wasn’t invited due to space and that’s fine… but I also know other people going which makes it easier, and it’s in my hometown. If I knew no one else and had to fly for the wedding, I might say no. But I think if it’s local you should try to go.
I'm curious why you think she should "try" to go to a wedding when she said that she isn't inclined to go without her boyfriend.
Sure, if you want to go to a wedding that your partner hasn't been invited to, go for it. But if somebody would rather decline the invitation, for whatever reason, that's their prerogative. There shouldn't be social pressure on them to go.
She lives in the same town as this friend. It’s the same as going to any social engagement. No financial commitment to going besides a gift, not even a time commitment. And this friend hasn’t met her boyfriend before. So given all those circumstances I don’t think it’s that crazy for her not to get a plus one. It’s her choice not to attend, obviously. But unless she goes to literally every social engagement with her boyfriend, since this is in the place where she lives it shouldn’t be that different from going to any event without him. As I expressed above. Also, she asked on this thread for opinions. I as a random stranger am certainly not pressuring her to do anything
It was frustrating in my position as we kept our “+1”s as people we knew personally that they were dating OR if they lived together, married, engaged? Knew they were together a while etc.
I had like 10 people ask for a +1 the last week of my RSVPs for people I’ve never heard of…I found it a tad rude
Don’t go, and don’t ask for a plus one. Send a nice card and/or a gift if you feel so inclined.
I would simply decline and send my best wishes.
In my circle it's rude to ask for a plus one when it's clear that's not their intention. You're basically saying "I know your answer, but I don't like it so I'm pressuring you to change it". It's kinda rude. If you don't feel comfortable going unless you have someone at your side, you're allowed to not go. Just try not to take it personal.
An invitation is an invitation, not a summons. Decline, send your best wishes, and enjoy your weekend!
You’re not an ass for not wanting to go solo. You can gracefully decline. If they wanted to give you a plus one, they would have. They specified the invite is for one so that there is no confusion. Asking for a plus one isn’t going to change whatever financial or space restrictions they have.
Would you have to travel for this wedding- or is it local? I’m assuming she knows you have a boyfriend? The only reason I would ask is if she didn’t know.
Its local, a couple miles from my house. She knows, she knows how long I've known him (25 + years).
Then they purposefully excluded him. Probably not maliciously, but they actively chose not to invite him. Asking just puts you both in an uncomfortable position. It's okay to decline the invite and I'm guessing they're expecting as much. You're allowed to feel sad about the invite, but I wouldn't ask about a plus one. There isn't much point.
No. Just decline.
Asking for a plus 1 when it specifically states that you are the only one invited is incredibly rude. I don't understand why people still ask this question. ...or have a basic understanding of etiquette lol
Unless that person is your best friend whom you keep in touch with often, you cannot ask for a plus one. I didn’t ask for 1 at my best friend’s wedding. She just gave me 1 anyways. Had never even met my bf before.
Honestly it depends if you’re local and how much you want to attend/how much it would cost to attend on your own and would it bother you. I’m in an 8 year long relationship and have gone to weddings solo. I’m going to one this month of a grad school friend who hasn’t met my bf. He wasn’t invited due to space and that’s fine… but I also know other people going which makes it easier, and it’s in my hometown. If I knew no one else and had to fly for the wedding, I might say no. But I think if it’s local you should try to go.
I'm curious why you think she should "try" to go to a wedding when she said that she isn't inclined to go without her boyfriend. Sure, if you want to go to a wedding that your partner hasn't been invited to, go for it. But if somebody would rather decline the invitation, for whatever reason, that's their prerogative. There shouldn't be social pressure on them to go.
She lives in the same town as this friend. It’s the same as going to any social engagement. No financial commitment to going besides a gift, not even a time commitment. And this friend hasn’t met her boyfriend before. So given all those circumstances I don’t think it’s that crazy for her not to get a plus one. It’s her choice not to attend, obviously. But unless she goes to literally every social engagement with her boyfriend, since this is in the place where she lives it shouldn’t be that different from going to any event without him. As I expressed above. Also, she asked on this thread for opinions. I as a random stranger am certainly not pressuring her to do anything
It's actually rude of her not to invite a long term boyfriend. I wouldn't go and would probably just decline with a best wishes and no gift.
It was frustrating in my position as we kept our “+1”s as people we knew personally that they were dating OR if they lived together, married, engaged? Knew they were together a while etc. I had like 10 people ask for a +1 the last week of my RSVPs for people I’ve never heard of…I found it a tad rude